Fairlady

'I did a 10-day water fast'

I haven’t eaten in eight days and I feel on top of the world. Right now I am standing in the shower, letting the water course down my body. It is close to scalding but I need the heat. I am cold to my bones. It is mid-summer but when I get out I will rub myself down and pull on leggings, a thermal vest and a sweater. Low body temperature is a side-effect of my current health regime.

I am on a medically monitored water fast. Water fasting is a pretty simple concept, really. Nothing but water passes your mouth for a period. Nothing. You can do it for 12 hours or 30 days. Illusionist David Blaine survived on only water in a glass box for 44 days in 2003. Surely I can do 10 days at a clinic in Mossel Bay?

As I get out of the shower I hop on the scale. I’ve lost 7kg since I started, my mouth tastes like a skunk may have died in it and my sweat stings like acid coming out of my body. I am sure I smell skunk-bad all over. This morning what looked like a cluster of luminous green pods of algae exited my bottom. I’m having serious second thoughts. But I am eight days in, with two days left, I paid a small fortune to be here and I’m determined to

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