LEARNING TO BREAK FREE
Most of us have developed coping strategies that we call upon when things aren’t going well for us.
‘As a one-off, even if it’s not particularly helpful, treating yourself to a new outfit, or an indulgent cream cake, is usually fairly harmless,’ says psychotherapist Sarah Robins. ‘This only becomes a problem if you find yourself slipping into destructive habits whenever anything knocks you off course. In therapy, these are known as self-defeating behaviours (SDB). So that rather than providing the positive outcome you want, the behaviour will actually diminish your ability to thrive.’
Sarah adds: ‘If you continually shy away from certain situations or experiences by indulging in an SDB, whether that is substance abuse, procrastination or avoidance, you are not living your best life. So, the first step is to acknowledge there may be an issue and then find a therapist who can help you find a path to a healthier future.’
Feel Good You chats to four women who overcame their own SDB…
ADDICTION
‘I wouldn’t show up because I was hungover’
