Stop Bullying: A Guide to Parents, Educators, Students and the General Community.

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Books authored and co-authored by Angela Ramsay

Adult Learning

University of the West Indies

Community Development Strategies

University of the West Indies

Adult Education in the Caribbean at the Turn of the Century

UNESCO 2001

The Dilemma of Science

Ian Randle, UNESCO sponsored

Understanding HIV/AIDS and Drug Abuse

UNESCO

We Can Stop Violence

UNESCO

Help for Anxious People

UNESCO

Good Practice in Achieving Universal Primary Education

Commonwealth Secretariat, London,

7 Continents and More, A Book of Poetry

Self Published.

The Entrepreneurial Journey of Oliver Jones

Scotiabank Chair, University of Technology, Jamaica.

Solving Hard Conflict

LMH Publishers, Kingston

Stop Bullying in Caribbean Schools

Dispute Resolution Foundation, Violence Prevention Alliance

Dr. Angela Ramsay is a licensed professional solution-focused coach.

She has a 6 Sigma Black Belt in Quality Management.

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Angela Ramsay, PhD

Dispute Resolution Foundation (DRF)

December 2013

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First Published in Jamaica 2014 by

Dispute Resolution Foundation (DRF)

Kingston, Jamaica

E-mail: drf@drfja.org

© Text by Dr. Angela Ramsay and The Dispute Resolution Foundation

All Rights Reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced,

stored in a retrieval system, or otherwise transmitted, in any form or by

any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise,

without the permission of the Author and the Publisher.

Please send the DRF an e-mail if you found this manual useful

(or even if you did not). We would like to hear from you!

Disclaimer: No liability will be assumed by the agencies involved

in the preparation of this manual or by its authors arising from the use

or interpretation of the information contained in the manual.

Design by Robert Harris

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Contents

Foreword

Preface

Acknowledgements

Definition of Terms

How to Use This Book

Introduction to Bullying

The Effects of Bullying

We Can Stop Bullying in Caribbean Schools

How Parents Help

How Principals Help

How Teahers Help

How Guidance Counsellors Help

How Students Help

How the General Community Helps

Appendix A: The Numbers – And How They Can Be Reduced

Appendix B: Calming Excercises and Poems

Appendix C: Resources

Notes and References

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Foreword

Dr. Angela Ramsay is a thinker who translates her many ideas into writing and into action. She comes from a long tradition of persons who have contributed value to Jamaicans and to others.

This book is one of Dr. Ramsay’s many publications and addresses a subject of great importance to families, schools and the people of the Caribbean.

Our idyllic countries with our abundant flora, fauna, water, natural resources, beautiful landscapes and interesting built environment are home to unique

people. With our vibrant culture, talent in the sciences, arts, sports and other productive areas, we are made up of indigenous people and people from many lands who call this home.

The call for Justice in these Caribbean lands requires us to promote and

protect the Rule of Law, human rights, children and the vulnerable through affirmation, communication, cooperation and respect for each other and our institutions.

This wonderful book embeds concepts of dispute resolution, restorative

justice and participation. It is easy to read and designed to allow various stakeholders, school-based professionals, family members, persons directly involved or affected by bullying, policy makers and service providers, like the Dispute Resolution Foundation (DRF), to address the matter of bullying in all its subtle and apparent forms – from refusing to share a school bench to cyber bullying.

Dr. Angela Ramsay through this book – a labour of love – generously donated to the Dispute Resolution Foundation, a Caribbean organization legally created in 1994, nurtured locally and serving the world, and Violence Prevention Alliance (VPA) an umbrella organization created in Jamaica under the auspices of a global movement for knowledge-based approach to violence through partnerships, have shown us all the way.

As citizens of the Caribbean we can play our part to make our nations safer for children, more productive and happier.

Let us honour the efforts of our governments, civil society, corporate social investors, international development partners and citizens to keep our fabric strong.

This generous gift from Dr. Angela Ramsay will help us do our part.

Thank you for your support as proceeds will support the programmes of the DRF and the VPA.

Donna Parchment Brown

Director of the Justice Reform Implementation Unit,

Ministry of Justice

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Preface

I solve conflicts between adults. I teach Caribbean educators who are dedicated to their students and schools. I also have private sector clients, who often visit me not to discuss their own conflicts and difficulties, but the bullying episodes in which their children are involved. They bring their children to visit me, so that I may coach them how to react when targeted, or how to reduce their levels of aggression at home and at school.

I realized that a book about bullying in Caribbean schools was greatly needed. As you will read, some students who bully become substance abusers or promote themselves into more serious acts of violence. Targets may be emotionally affected by negative school experiences for years, even for the rest of their lives. Bystanders who simply watch the bullying tend to get into the habit of doing little or nothing to help their communities.

Bullying has been around since schools began. I have always heard tales about bullying, not only about students bullying each other, but students attacking teachers as well. My mother told me that when her uncle was a school boy, he knocked down a male teacher. We do not know if student aggression is worse now than it was during my uncle’s school days, but the advent of cyberspace has added a new dimension to bullying. Furthermore, the level of violence has increased in the Caribbean over the past three decades, and you will read that the level of bullying in schools has a relationship with national crime levels.

The purpose of this book, which is a gift to the Dispute Resolution Foundation and the Violence Prevention Alliance, is to present a source of information about the prevention of bullying in Caribbean schools. My original idea was to write a short book for students over the age of fifteen and their teachers and principals, who could advocate for or implement whole-school bullying prevention programmes. It occurred to me that a book devoted to principals, teachers and students would not have the desired impact if other stakeholders were not involved. If each stakeholder understands the opportunities and challenges associated with the roles of other stakeholders, we will reduce bullying in schools much more successfully.

Chapters 3 to 7 contain sections referred to as Practicalities, which contain how to tips on performing one or two specific recommendations contained in those chapters. The Student Practicalities, called the Refocusing Exercise, helps them to plan exciting projects rather than focus their energies on gratuitous aggression or other negative behaviours and actions.

The book ends on a positive note. Fortunately, in the Caribbean, the aggression of young persons is being addressed by the growing numbers of NGOs, civic organizations and educational institutions that work towards civic responsibility, conflict resolution and violence prevention.

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Acknowledgements

There are many persons to be acknowledged in a book of this nature. First and foremost is Mrs. Donna Parchment-Brown, CD, ACIArb, who has paid for the design of the book out of her own pocket! This remarkable gesture however is not surprising from a co-founder of the Dispute Resolution Foundation in Jamaica, and through her efforts as Chief Executive Officer 1994–2013, achieved tremendous strides in Dispute Resolution in Jamaica. Though Mrs. Parchment Brown is now the Director of the Justice Reform Implementation Unit at the Ministry of Justice, she continues to take an active interest in the efforts of the Dispute Resolution Foundation.

Mr. Paul Hines, Chief Executive Officer of the Dispute Resolution Foundation, is to be congratulated for his highly proactive stance in getting this book published. I also acknowledge the work of the Violence Prevention Alliance, led by the indefatigable Chairperson, Dr. Elizabeth Ward, in helping to successfully reduce violence in several Jamaican communities.

To be acknowledged also are the editors. A splendid job of editing was done by Mrs. Chris Maher, volunteer extraordinaire at The Women’s Resource and Outreach Centre’s Homework Programme. No errant word or comma could escape the eagle editing eyes of Mr. Horace Levy, Executive Member, The Peace Management Initiative, and author of several books and articles. A wonderful quality of both editors was their cheerfulness in addition to their generosity of spirit. The designer Mr. Robert Harris has of course done his usual remarkable job.

The other persons to be acknowledged are the hundreds of teachers, parents and students who have visited me over the decades and who have provided useful and relevant material to place in the book. These persons have dealt with uncomfortable, unpleasant and sometimes traumatic experiences associated with bullying episodes, therefore providing excellent reasons for the reduction of bullying occurrences within the Caribbean region.

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Definition of Terms

The following describes how terms are used in this book:

Parent: A biological or adoptive parent, or guardian.

Perpetrator: A student who bullies other students.

Principal: The head of an educational institution. Vice Principals and Deputy Heads are also included in the term.

School: A primary, secondary or tertiary educational institution.

Student: A person attending a primary, secondary or tertiary educational institution.

Target: A student who is bullied by another student. The author does not use the term victim because of its highly negative connotations: victims are often perceived as permanently weak or helpless.¹

Teacher: Educators at all levels in the primary, secondary and tertiary educational system.

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How to Use

This Book

Ideally, each reader should review not only the introduction but also the responsibilities of each stakeholder to receive a wider appreciation of the role that each stakeholder assumes in the prevention of bullying. Students over the age of fifteen should read the chapter entitled " How Students Help ", written in a different style from the rest of the book.

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Introduction to Bullying

What is Bullying?

Bullying is a wrong we can set right.

Bullying is the verbal, physical or emotional harassment of any person on a regular basis for days, weeks, months or years. Some Caribbean students use the word bullying to define harassment at school, and others use terms such as pick on me, trouble me and get on my case.

Bullying is different from the regular conflicts that happen among children and teenagers. Much bullying is unprovoked. In addition, perpetrators engage in conflicts that they are sure to win, and are often merciless in their tactics and strategies. When a student is bullied, there is almost always a great imbalance of power. Targets are unable to defend themselves because they are physically weaker or are harassed by two or more perpetrators.

What Bullying is Not

• It is not constructive conflict, which is the beneficial kind of conflict that allows us to create new ideas and bring new views to the table.

• It is not normal child play: it has the edge of cruelty, and can be relentless

• It does not represent the whole child. There are other aspects to the personalities of perpetrators and targets that are strong, capable or endearing.

• Fortunately, it is not unsolvable: in fact, bullying can be reduced substantially in schools.

Direct and Indirect Bullying

There are two kinds of bullying: direct and indirect.

Examples of direct bullying:

• Physical Harm includes hitting, pushing, kicking and similar actions. Sometimes the deed does not inflict much physical pain, such as dumping a fellow student in a garbage container: the objective is to humiliate the target.

• Property Damage involves destroying the target’s belongings.

• Verbal Abuse is using words with the intent to emotionally wound the target.

Some students do not view indirect bullying as wrong, believing that if they have not physically touched another student or destroyed his or her property, they are not bullies.²

Examples of indirect bullying involve:

• shunning

• damaging the reputation of another student by spreading malicious gossip

• writing graffiti on a wall.

Specialized Forms of Bullying

There are also specialized kinds