Always Enough, Never Too Much: 100 Devotions to Quit Comparing, Stop Hiding, and Start Living Wild and Free

EVEN WHEN YOU MAKE MISTAKES

Jess

There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death.

—ROMANS 8:1–2

These verses of Romans 8 were the first I really memorized as an adult, and they changed my life. It was in a season when I was moving past just believing the gospel and learning to receive the good news for myself. I’d been a believer in Jesus for almost ten years, but I’d found myself broken and busted after a decade of cracks and mistakes. I didn’t understand why I was still struggling with some of the same old stuff. I didn’t understand why I just kept messing up. I was tired of me and sure that the Lord was too—not to mention the humans who had to put up with me every day.

I’ll never forget my husband sitting me down and saying, Jess, you believe the gospel, but you don’t like receiving it. You’re a new creation, but you’re going to need grace for the rest of your life. There is no condemnation for you. We all make mistakes, and we’re all going to keep making mistakes.

In that moment, as I sat on our cheap brown couch we’d gotten off Craigslist, the Lord opened my eyes to the actual beauty of the gospel. Suddenly it was like I could see the world in color. I could see my need for Him, not with disdain, but with eyes of gratitude and joy. I could perceive other people’s cracks and mistakes without getting incredibly frustrated with them, and instead could see them covered in the same grace that I so desperately needed.

I began pacing around my house repeating those words—There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.

Have you made a mistake or a misstep? Maybe it’s small, but lingering in your soul. Maybe it’s huge, and the idea of calling it just a mistake is causing tears to well up in your eyes. What I love about the word mistake is that it speaks to some surprise on our part. Maybe we did the thing willingly and knowingly, but it’s not what we thought we’d do. Maybe you hurt someone, but you certainly didn’t premeditate it for months. We can often be surprised that we still have a fallen nature. We can be surprised by our mistakes. But do you know who isn’t? The One who extended grace.

We can be surprised by our mistakes. But do you know who isn’t? The One who extended grace.

When Jesus hung on the cross for you, when He purchased your place in the family of God, the Father knew about every single mistake you’d make—small, big, devastating, even the ones you wouldn’t know to repent of. And He said that you are enough to die for, worthy of saving, found in need of grace—not because you’ve done everything right, but because He made you and loves you. Your mistakes can’t keep you from Him; He’s said that there is now no condemnation for you.

EVEN WHEN YOU DON’T HAVE ENOUGH ENERGY

Hayley

I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.

—JOHN 15:5

The American ideal is a shiny, efficient, productive penny. We want to have a big impact and a bright future. We want to be valuable world-changers on mission for the Lord. The thing is, our idea of our mission doesn’t always look like the mission God has planned.

God doesn’t promise that we’ll have healthy, able bodies. He doesn’t promise that this life will be without sickness or injury. We live in a broken place where death creeps ever nearer. But He doesn’t see our value based on our vigor.

Sometimes our ability to work for the Lord is diminished to a point where we’re only able to be for the Lord. But this doesn’t worry Him at all. God has assigned an inherent value to your life as an image-bearer of Himself. There is nothing you could do to make Him love you less . . . or more.

And that or more is serious business. For productivity-obsessed people who like to live by to-do lists and achievement awards, this inability to impress God can feel heartbreaking. But for someone who lacks energy or is dealing with life’s harsh medical possibilities, this can feel like a balm. You don’t need to shine yourself up or work extra hard to be good for God. Jesus already accomplished that for you the moment you believed in Him and followed His call.

Your exhaustion does not diminish God’s good work in your life. I promise. He promises! You could be unable to utter a word, relegated to a hospital bed, and even unconscious, and His ability to work through you would not be lessened one iota. This is a reality of His upside-down kingdom.

Your exhaustion does not diminish God’s good work in your life.

The abilities we have often get in the way because we demand to use them. But when we’re unable, God shines brightly through us in a manner that is unmistakably Him.

So don’t fear if it feels like you don’t have enough energy for the call God has on your life. Where you are weak—and aren’t we all?—He is strong.

Rest knowing He is with you and His Spirit is in you. He is mighty in you precisely because you are weak. You are a willing vessel, emptied of your ability but filled with His. What a comforting place to be. The end of striving marks the beginning of abiding.

EVEN WHEN YOU’RE NOT THE MOST THOUGHTFUL

Jess

If it is serving, then serve; if it is teaching, then teach; if it is to encourage, then give encouragement; if it is giving, then give generously; if it is to lead, do it diligently; if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully.

—ROMANS 12:7–8

She’d slip a card in my purse when I wasn’t watching. She’d text me words of encouragement or a prayer, and I’d forget to even respond. My friend Karen would remember some really small detail of something I said I liked, and she’d go out of her way to get it for me.

I beat myself up for months for being so different from her, feeling inadequate to be her friend, and honestly feeling unworthy of even being in the same community as her. Karen must think I’m the worst, I thought. Other women must see me in comparison with her and wonder why in the world I’m the pastor’s wife and the women’s ministry leader when this other gal is shepherding and loving women so well.

In the wake of her loving shadow, I felt like everything I did was too little and too late. To be frank, it felt as though when I was trying to love people by writing notes or buying gifts, I was just doing those things to be like Karen. They didn’t feel genuine.

I didn’t realize how truly broken I was until I heard another woman compare herself to my sweet friend out loud. The second friend was so good at giving wisdom. She shined when she was sharing compassionate and wise counsel, and I’d never once felt unloved or unseen by her because she hadn’t bought me a candle or slipped me a notecard.

Then I realized that in comparing ourselves to Karen, we were robbing ourselves of the opportunity to worship God by seeing how uniquely He’d made our thoughtful friend. Rather than praising Him for giving her the beautiful talent of thoughtfulness, we were turning it into anti-worship. We were doubting how He’d made us, and we were so busy doing it, we stopped being our kind of thoughtful altogether.

What kind of thoughtful has God made me? I’m great at dropping everything for my friends. When they’ve had a hard day or their marriage is in crisis, they know they can call me at 2:00 a.m. and I’ll be there. If they’re having surgery, I’ll fly there to be with them. I’ll walk out of my own meeting to celebrate their meeting that went super well. It’s just my varied nature of thoughtfulness. Does that mean that I stop trying to love well and grow in other areas of friendship and relationship? Absolutely not. But it does mean that I acknowledge the ways God has made me and the grace He’s given me to love with what I’ve got.

I know this for certain: you were made in the image of God, and you’ve been made good at loving others by the power of the Holy Spirit.

I wonder how He’s graced you to love well. I wonder what your gifts of thoughtfulness and sacrifice look like. I know this for certain: you were made in the image of God, and you’ve been made good at loving others by the power of the Holy Spirit. It’s just up to you to agree with that proclamation. You are thoughtful and kind; step into it with a worshipful heart.

EVEN WHEN YOU DON’T HAVE ENOUGH FRIENDS

Hayley

There is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.

—PROVERBS 18:24

There have been years of my life when I have felt utterly alone. I had my husband and my kids, but I felt I had no soul friends. I had no one to mourn with, and I had no one to celebrate with. I didn’t even feel like I had anyone to go to dinner with.

This all started innocently enough. I was feeling a little hurt by community and a little unseen. So, instead of challenging myself to stay put and go deeper with people, I retreated. I fled to the comfort and quiet of my head and home. I am content being by myself, so it took me awhile to realize that what I was feeling was profound loneliness. It surprised me.

Jesus was not immune to loneliness. He had throngs of people with Him all the time. One time He even went into a boat and pushed off the shore in order to get some space so He could preach. He knew what it was like to be wanted and seen.

But even His real-life, close, intimate friends couldn’t totally relate to Him. He always seemed to know more than they did. He was teaching them. He was with them, but He was also set apart.

In the Upper Room, which was really just the upstairs of a townsperson’s house, He enjoyed His last meal with His friends. He loved them, but He also knew that many of them were going to leave Him and deny knowing Him. He was going to be plunged to a deeper level of loneliness than He’d known at that point.

As it turns out, Jesus lost one good friend—and that friend, Judas, completely betrayed Him. Peter, while still loving Jesus, denied knowing Him when the stakes got too high. Jesus couldn’t count on His friends to know Him, see Him, or love Him.

It’s true that Jesus knows our every disappointment, every temptation, every pursuit. He lived a real, human life and endured all the trials we do. We can go to Him when we are lonely, when we’ve been turned down or spurned. We can go to Him when we’ve been betrayed; He promises never to do that to us. He is an utterly safe Friend who can fulfill all our needs.

Jesus knows our every disappointment, every temptation, every pursuit.

In my loneliness, He showed me how I’d isolated myself and lovingly challenged me to put down roots and invest in the women around me. What felt impossible began to feel real, and suddenly I had the friendships I’d desired. These friendships were even better than I’d hoped because they began with obedience instead of like-mindedness and similarity. I wasn’t seeking people to love me; instead, I was seeking to love others.

We hope for an abundance of good friends on earth. God created us to desire community and to be known. But as important as friendships are, ultimately it is Jesus who satisfies. He is the one true Friend who will never turn away, never back down, never stop hoping. He is the end to loneliness in our hearts.

EVEN WHEN YOU DON’T FEEL LIKE A CHURCH GAL

Jess

Jesus said to them, It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.

—MARK 2:17

I was a mess before I met Jesus. I was only fifteen, but my life was filled with all the typical brokenness that you’d expect someone far from God to turn to. Drugs, sex, alcohol. Check, check, check. I’d spent time in the back of a police car. I skipped school more than I sat in class. I lied through my teeth to my parents, who thought I was just your average teen.

And then, miraculously, one day Jesus grabbed my heart. I literally said to Him, Fine. I give in. We’ll try it Your way instead. That is my beautiful salvation story. I’d been holding out on Him; I knew He was real and ready for me, but up until that glorious moment, I was not open to a relationship with Him.

Once I gave my life to Jesus, I knew that it was time to clean up my act. My family began going to a different church, and I met some incredible Jesus-following friends who were my age. I deduced very quickly that they did not engage in the activities that I did, so I knew something had to shift. Something had to change.

Sadly, through no fault of anyone else’s, I deduced that the church was more of a pageant where we paraded our holiness and less of a hospital for the heartsick. I hid my addictions and my brokenness because I was scared for anyone to really see how busted I was. And what was the saddest thing about this? I missed out on the healing that Jesus had to offer because I assumed that if the people couldn’t handle my wounds, He couldn’t either.

I lived this way for years . . . until I cracked. I lived this way for years . . . until I came across today’s verse.

God the Father didn’t send His Son to be a beauty pageant judge. God didn’t send Jesus to bind together the tidy and the healthy to build a beautiful church. God sent His Son to heal the brokenhearted, to mercifully tend to the sick, and to establish the church as a gathering place for people to come as they are to receive Him in His fullness.

God sent His Son to heal the brokenhearted, to mercifully tend to the sick, and to establish the church as a gathering place for people to come as they are to receive Him in His fullness.

Guess what? There is no mold for a woman in the church that you have to fit into. If you’re a woman who needs God, you belong. You are enough as you are because Christ is within you. If you feel broken, remember that we all are. If you feel busted, don’t believe anyone who says that they’re not. You belong because He says you do,