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    Keeping Your Word: One of the Greatest <Br>Gifts You Can Give <Br>To Your Children
    Keeping Your Word: One of the Greatest <Br>Gifts You Can Give <Br>To Your Children
    Keeping Your Word: One of the Greatest <Br>Gifts You Can Give <Br>To Your Children
    Ebook147 pages2 hours

    Keeping Your Word: One of the Greatest
    Gifts You Can Give
    To Your Children

    By Maureen Murphy DeLucia

    ()

    Read preview

    About this ebook

    Why not make a masterpiece of your life as a parent? In this book you'll discover... How many things you are already doing right as a parent... How you and your family can lead a calmer life... How you can strengthen your relationship with your children... How you can emphasize love and minimize the emotional aspects of parenting... How you can examine the values you wish to pass down to your own children...

    The key to becoming the best parent you can be is to develop the habit of consistency. When you say what you mean and do what you say, it gives your children a message of clarity. When you "keep your word," you teach your children about honesty and integrity in your everyday lives.

    As parents, when you truly live the values you believe in, and model them on a daily basis, you are giving your children two of the greatest gifts you can ever give them.

    DeLucia condenses over three decades of study and experience with parents and children to help you enhance the parenting skills you already have. You'll learn how you can make your most important vision of being the best parent you can be, a reality.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisheriUniverse
    Release dateMar 22, 2005
    ISBN9780595795543
    Keeping Your Word: One of the Greatest <Br>Gifts You Can Give <Br>To Your Children
    Author

    Maureen Murphy DeLucia

    Maureen and her husband, Tony, have two sons. She has taught kindergarten for 31 years. Maureen was the recipient of the 1996 Teacher of the Year award in Wallingford, Connecticut.

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      Book preview

      Keeping Your Word - Maureen Murphy DeLucia

      Contents

      Acknowledgements

      Preface

      Introduction

      1

      LOVE

      2

      DISCIPLINE

      3

      EMOTIONS

      4

      VALUES

      5

      RELATIONSHIPS

      6

      CHILDHOOD HISTORY

      7

      GRIEF

      8

      FAITH

      9

      SCHOOL

      10

      CHILDREN AND MONEY

      Conclusion

      Dedicated

      with love,

      to my sons

      TJ and Drew

      Acknowledgements

      I would like to thank the following people for their support and encouragement, without which this book could not have been created.

      Elizabeth and William Murphy for being the best parents they could be.

      My husband Tony, for his loyalty and dependability.

      Beth MacDonald, Tim Murphy, Pat Murphy and Bill Murphy for their encouragement and love during this project.

      Marilyn Bolles, whose commitment to this book has gone beyond words…Her perseverance and patience uplifted me countless times.

      Kathy Banks, for her invaluable feedback and the countless hours she spent editing.

      Sally Wells, Pat & Fran Stupakevich, Nancy Linton, Lori Farkash, Jan Murphy, Cliff Overstrum, Noel Cain, Keeley Dunleavey, Diane Baum and Johnna Schlosser for their enthusiastic support of this book.

      To all of my kindergarteners from the past 31 years, for sharing their innocence, hugs and irrepressible love for life with me.

      To all of my kindergarten parents who offered encouragement as this book was being created-I extend my heartfelt thanks.

      Preface

      I have been a kindergarten teacher for thirty one years and have two terrific sons of my own. Throughout these many years parents have worn a path to my kindergarten door with questions and concerns about parenting. They have sought advice and shared their many frustrations as parents.

      I feel like I’m carrying around pages of script inside my heart. For years I have jotted down useful information and quotes about parenting on index cards and put them on my refrigerator as friendly reminders. After several years of little scraps of paper floating around, I decided to gather all of the ideas into one place. This collection of ideas has grown out of my experiences as a mother and a kindergarten teacher. It has all sprung from the stuff of my life. In many ways it is about how my children have taught me to pay attention.

      Since the 1950’s thousands of books on every possible aspect of childrear-ing have been published. The question remains: Are we raising more loving children as a result? I’m not sure…But that has not discouraged me from attempting to make my own contribution. The truth is that no one raises a child alone. Connectedness is of vital importance. Most parents reach out to others to learn along the way. Parenting is a life-long process of struggle and joy all wrapped together.

      Introduction

      For many years there has been a pounding in my heart to instill in my children that they keep their word. In our society it is so customary not to do so. People say things they don’t mean or that are untrue all of the time.

      Truth is a virtue that must be in the heart and mind of every child. What we say, how we act, how we talk, whether we are honest, these are all the things that define truth in our daily lives. If these seeds of truth were planted in all children, we would have a world filled with many more people who truly keep their word.

      The thread of keeping our word will resound throughout this book in the many areas we explore together. It will show up when we talk about ways to love our children, discipline, siblings, teenagers and emotions in parenthood.

      When we instill the practice of keeping our word with children, we are doing them a tremendous service to guide them the rest of their lives. Attention to the truth creates individuals who are dependable and responsible people. It is inward qualities that we are describing here, such as good manners, thoughtfulness, and being considerate of others. To be kind, not to be influenced by other people, but to think for themselves, that is what we want for our children.

      Since all parents’ backgrounds are not alike, it’s important to acknowledge what is unique about you and your family. It is hoped that this book will provide an opportunity to reflect on your upbringing and your values in relation to how these things directly affect your parenting.

      As parents, we need to take an inventory of our own values. We need to examine fully what virtues we truly want to pass on to the next generation. Living the values we believe in and modeling them on a daily basis are two of the greatest gifts we can give to our children.

      We need more

      love and loyalty

      in our lives today.

      A good place to begin

      is at home.

      Take time to

      love your family.

      ~Mother Teresa—

      1

      LOVE

      …hold onto whatever resonates with you…

      Now that we are going to be spending some time together, why don’t we do it right here in my kindergarten room. We call it the love room. I’m usually moving around the room, preparing for the children’s arrival, but during your visits, you can sit and relax in my old wooden rocking chair. I’ll do most of the talking, and you just reach out and hold onto whatever resonates with you…and let the rest go…

      Acknowledgment

      Don’t you just hate it when grownups pretend…

      A beautiful little girl named Ranee taught me a powerful lesson twenty-five years ago about ways to show love to children, or should I say how not to show love. It happened one sunny day in kindergarten. She approached my desk with love and laughter, and as she twirled around with sheer delight, she said, Mrs. DeLucia, don’t you just love my pretty, blue dress? I barely lifted my head to acknowledge her, and said, Yes, Ranee. Without skipping a beat, Ranee turned to the little girl next to her and said, Don’t you just hate it when grown-ups pretend they see you when they really don’t?

      In just those few words Ranee had jolted me with a lesson for a lifetime. I am so grateful that she made me take notice of how important every precious, present moment is with children. I have tried never to forget the message the five-year old girl taught me that day. The truth is there is pain associated with the countless ways adults make children feel invisible. Therefore, one concrete way to show love to children is to acknowledge them. Even five-year olds know the difference between sincerity and insincerity.

      So rather than make the same mistake I did with Ranee, be sincere with your comments to children. From the earliest time, instill in them that they have something unique to offer. Help them understand and believe that while all people are in essence alike, each is also uniquely special to this planet. You can do this by spending time alone with each child. When you make the child the center of your attention, even if it’s for a short time, you bless him.

      In addition, when you are with them, take every opportunity you can to catch them at being good. At home, make time with your children. As you are doing things in your home to create a warm and loving atmosphere, do things together as a family. Create traditions that children can count on. For example, establish supper together at a certain time; establish that stories will be read before bed; take a family walk together on the weekend, or make sure everyone takes an interest in the hobbies of one another. Eventually, children will not only appreciate these family traditions, but also

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