Leota Douglas

Professor: Susan Lago

ENG-1100 College Writing
2/12/2014
Main Goal of Parenting
Parenting a topic that can be seen as a controversial issue when discussed, because there
is no formula used to become a perfect parent. The free dictionary defines a parent as one who
begets, gives birth to, or nurtures and raises a child; a father or mother. This is a generalized
overview of what a parent is, to determine the deeper complex meaning of a parent we look to
experiences, society and the overall nature of the child. The main goal of parenting is to raise a
child in a respectable and loving way, so that the child will go out into the world and be equipped
with the tools needed to become upstanding citizens of society. Three key components I believe
contribute in achieving the main goal of parenting, these are quality education, safe and nurturing
environment, and developing social
For this to be accomplished I believe that they are key components that should be
incorporated into the parenting style to achieve this goal. The first component is providing a high
quality of education to a child. As Amy Chua stated Chinese mothers believe their children can
be number 1 in every subject, so therefore they take the necessary steps to ensure the children
excel in everything they do. Following this idea, parents should be proactive in the quality of
education their child is receives. When I think of this I draw a comparison to how my mother
approached education growing up. My mother always stressed the importance of being educated,
a quote I remember her saying they can take everything for you but not whats in your head.
To achieve a quality education goal my mother saw to us we attended school daily it was no
reason to stay at home unless of an illness. The completion of home work was a daily task, if no
home work was assigned my mother made us work on spelling and multiplication facts.
I have also experience parenting that lacks involvement in the academic lives of their
children. Working in a literacy based program, there are parents who become upset when their
childs home work is not completed because being picked up, and I have also had children who
expressed the lack of support in the home in terms of home work and encouraging reading. A
motto I came across is education is the key to success, without securing quality education for a
child the amount of opportunities afforded to them will significantly decrease.
All children should be afforded the opportunity to be raised in a safe and nurturing
environment. The safety aspect of this component can be accomplished in a relatively easy way.
Proving a clean and safe place, free of harmful and hazardous agents in which they can
comfortably dwell. A child can be compared to a plant, for the plant to grow and blossom we
provide the necessities needed for the transformation to occur. Its the same approach to raising a
child, we must prove love and support in all aspect of the childs life so that they can feel
motivated and loved. This reassures them they anything to can be attained. They have a support
system backing them, to encourage fulfillment of hopes and dreams. Parents must relay
expectations and rules to a child in a way they can receive it without feeling threaten and bullied.
Driving fear into a childs head is not a good trait that a parent should use. Instead provide clear
understand, being firm but still express love and compassion in the event a child fails at
something in life. Which is why I disagree with the verbal and physical punishment handed
down to the children in Amy Chuas piece. A child should never feel degrading; tearing a childs
self esteem down is no way to motivate a child into performing better. From personal experience
I never achieved straight As in school, my mother stressed the importance of education but at
the same time understood we are not perfect. I was comforted and motivated to do better by my
mother explaining that I have the ability to perform better academically.
The final component is developing social qualities. We cannot avoid society its
something that will always be there, so we must develop qualities to make us better form a union
with society. The lead by example method comes to mind when thinking of this component. We
must set examples of how to act in social settings, by displaying the adequate tools children will
begin to learn how adjust to certain situations. Allowing children to engage in social contact with
their peers and other individuals is also another way of learning. In some cases its trial and error
for the children, if they react to something in a social setting and it is frowned upon they will
adjust and find other ways that work to make handle society without feeling overwhelmed or
shutting down. David Brooks explained the importance of social qualities in his response to Amy
Chuas piece. He states that a group is more successful when the members are good at reading
each others emotions. And social skills are not taught formally, but through experience.
Sheltering a child and avoiding social situations will in the end prove to be a challenge for the
child when throw into a setting as such.