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Richard Porter
Professor Onwuzuruoha
English 1010
July 18
th
, 2014
Minefields
Politics and peoples views are always a minefield to navigate. Friendships and families are often
destroyed with a simple misspoken piece of information regarding a hot button political topic
mentioned in casual conversation. Have you ever been standing in a place talking, as adults do, to a boss
or coworker when one says something about the sitting President in disagreement with the views of
another person engaged in the conversation? With no notice at all the conversation, which could have
been about their childrens homework, turns into a witch hunt like inquisition into the educational
policies of sitting politicians. Regardless of your own political beliefs, all sanity and reason gets tossed
out the door as people begin to place their political beliefs above the friendships and family
relationships they have valued for much longer than a lot of these politicians will hold office. Navigating
these conversational minefields and diffusing any you may accidentally step on has become more and
more a valuable commodity in todays world. With more and more things becoming perceived, whether
its true or not, as government involvement it can be difficult to know if you are stepping on that
landmine or not.
There was a time I was engaged in barbeque activities on a Sunday. My neighbors and I
barbeque every Sunday and this was not an uncommon occurrence for us to find ourselves outside
enjoying the day with food. This day was a little different. While we were winding down, we found
ourselves discussing policies of the school district we live in. My neighbor is a teacher in the West Jordan
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school district and is intimately aware of the workings more so than myself or several of the people
discussing the topic. As a parent, I began outlining some of the disappointing things Ive dealt with as a
result of some of the school policies my son has been forced to endure over his short time in elementary
school. My neighbor addressed some of the concerns my wife and I held about these issues. As we got
further and further into the discussion, my neighbors wife became more and more agitated about the
policies that she found most frustrating that directly affected their family, as he is a teacher. It seemed
to me at the time this conversation was spiraling to a place it was not intended to go originally. We
continued to talk further about the school district on a local level until someone brought up a federal
education policy as a talking point. This was the landmine needed to blow the conversation up from
small smoldering fire, to raging ten foot high bon fire. The topic quickly changed from the education
policy to the policies the sitting President was enacting, not just on education, but all aspects of his
administration. Whether I agreed with the speculations being offered or not, the conversation which
began with concerned parents talking about the situation at their childrens school, had turned into a
political diatribe and commentary about everything a person could disagree with the federal
government on.
When the conversation took a turn I became uncomfortable. These types of situations often end
poorly and there was a lot riding on the outcome of this situation. These were my neighbors. These
were the people I barbequed with every Sunday. These are the people whose children play outside with
my children every day. Some of the greatest food Ive ever eaten has come from association with these
people and all of this seemed to be spiraling toward jeopardy because of a few concerns two parents
had about a school. What do you do? Disagree or not with what is being said, I felt like anything I could
say would only be adding fuel to the fire. I dont typically find myself championing an idea until I have
gather sufficient facts to form an opinion, so participation half way seemed out. The person speaking
was getting louder, and more fervent in their statements about the problems with our country. What
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to do? When you want to be the calm voice of reason, but cant, how do you bring it back down to
normal levels of conversation? In this case I was saved by the sunset. I held on politely nodding in
agreement with some of the less explosive things said, and bode my time well, waiting for the sun to
vanish, and bed time for the children to be called. It worked. My wife politely interrupted and stated it
was time to go to bed for our children. We would have to leave the rest of the conversation for another
time. Success! I had made it. I felt like a soccer team who had succeeded at running out the clock with a
two goal lead. Defense makes that possible, and I had mounted one in this conversation. Politely
nodding in agreement with the less explosive ideas, slightly suggesting alternatives in line with what the
person speaking was talking about, and playing it safe with silence, had gotten me through regular time
and ensured future events involving the art of the grill. When we walked inside, I looked at my wife and
said, That was rough, but I made it without ending our friendship by saying something stupid. She
thanked me for that.
What have we learned from this situation? How can minefields of all kinds be navigated by
regular people thrust into bon fire like conversations? In the heat of the moment the key is to keep your
cool. Adding fire to the situation by stating inflammatory things, only makes the people already heated,
hotter. Bide your time without giving up what you believe in the situation. Make polite statements in
line with the idea but dont compromise your stand on an issue. Most important of all, find an exit
strategy that wont offend. Get out as soon as you can to ensure your family and friendship bonds
arent.