Lichter 1

Progression 1 revised
Dylan Lichter
Professor Ditch
English 114A
14 September 2014
Parents Inscribing Our Futures Mind
At a young age a child is taught by their parents to be either masculine or
feminine. Girls are dressed in dresses or skirts with vibrant colors like pink or purple.
Guys are dressed in jeans and t-shirts with darker colors like blue or black. Parents are
the deciding factor in this as kids can't dress themselves and they have no idea about the
world yet just two individuals is all they know. Many people have tried to raise
awareness about this like Aaron Devor ''Becoming a member of society" and Emily W.
Kane. No Way My Boys Are Going to Be Like That they both explain how parents
influence our children's minds and how their actions affect how children see the world
and how Parents shape their child into either masculine or feminine roles. I can see in my
own life how parents are shaping gender roles at a young age influencing children to only
fall into their stereotypical gender that society has enforced.

Emily W. Kane, No Way My Boys Are Going to Be Like That is a strong

example of how parents shape their child into either masculine or feminine roles. A father
explained to Kane that when taking his son to a clothing store I try to shy my son away
from the Power Puff Girls shirt or anything like thatI would steer him away from a
pink shirt as opposed to having him wear a blue shirt (93). This is a strong example of

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how parents shape their children. This father is teaching his son that boys do not wear
Power Puff Girls or pink clothes. This is a strong example of pathos for men since most
men were brought up the same way and taught to steer clear of certain colors because
they may come off as feminine. Parents shape their boy's masculinity by saying, stop
crying like a girl(95). As if girls are the only ones to cry in the world this is probably the
biggest thing in the book of masculinity that men dont cry they have to be strong and
tough. They have to take the pain like a man and bite their lip.

Children aren't born knowing what gender is they learn it like everything else in
life Aaron Devor stated that, children begin to settle into a gender identity between the
ages of eighteen months and two years. For me its a whole different story being put up
for adoption at a young age kind of prevented this from happening I would wear some
random clothes everyday until the age of 4 when my parents adopted me I really didnt
know what boys wore and girls wore so it was just up to them to decide. Of course I kind
of knew what a girl was and a boy but it never really sank in at this young of an age so
when growing up it was never really set into my mind I remember that in the second
grade I would wear a pink shirt pretty much anytime. I could write, real men wear pink
across my chest in black writing and I would be proud. My favorite color was pink until
my parents told me how ridiculous I look and threw out my pink shirts I had to like blue
or green, which is considered a masculine color in society today.

I can never cry anymore, even though when i was a child I did cry a lot.
Eventually, every time I was about to cry everyone would say oh no here comes the

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water works, Everyone in my family would tell me to stop being a girl and stop
crying, Of course I never could stop crying. I think I wasted all my tears or it was inscribe
in me not to cry because now I can never cry even if I really need to I think that I am
subconsciously repressing the sadness. Parents think that by making their children not cry
it presents them to be masculine. But if the child is a girl they get to cry all they want and
no one bats an eye. The only time boy maybe able to cry is if they break a leg playing
football.

Parents put their children in specific sports at a young age, if the child is a boy
they usually are put to play football, basketball, soccer or baseball. If the child is a girl,
they usually are put in dance of some sort. Although some boys do dance their peers look
them at to be more feminine. Their peers look at girls who play football or an aggressive
sport as a tomboy. Parents tell girls not to be aggressive since the aura of aggression,
violence, and daring, and who conscientiously avoid anything associated with femininity
are seen as exuding masculinity as Devor explains in his article Becoming Members of
Society. Devor states that the common belief is that feminine characteristics are
thought to be intrinsic to the female facility for childbirth and breastfeeding. Hence it is
popularly believed that the social position of females is biologically mandated to be
intertwined with the care of children. This has created the stereotypes that all women
have to be great nurtures and men arent the ones who take care of the children. This is
why children toys are so different girl toys are based around nurturing like toy babies and
dolls.

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I can see how I am conforming to societies standards. As now I have a 2-year-old
nephew I can see how I am teaching him to be masculine and how we encourage him to
be masculine. I see how went I buy or pick out toys for him they are masculine and I
stay away from things that come out to be as feminine. I try to get him toys that I got
when I was little. Action figures not dolls, cars and planes not fairies. If he plays dress up
its as buzz lightyear not a princess. Already I see how we know what sports he is going to
play and even at a young age my brother has already told us how he is going to help him
stretch so that he can be good at football. Even before he was born we had already talked
about how he is going to play football and as his parent he can do this, which is falling
into societys standards of masculinity.

Parents teach their sons that girls will be dependent on males for support and
protection. Also its goes the other way around parents tell their daughters to find
someone who can protect them. Of course people do need protection because there are so
many bad people in the world who try to inflict pain or do it for personal gain but to teach
them that they have to depend on someone else instead of themselves may no be the right
way to go about it because you are not teaching them how to protect themselves chances
are the parents of the male arent teaching him how to protect a women it is supposed to
be instinctive. This is why people say that women arent as strong as men because men
are supposed to be stronger based on societies standards, which puts the pressure on men
to be able to protect women.

In the end we have to be open to new types of parenting for our children. We

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should not limit them because of societies standards of feminine and masculine. We
should be open to new things, as parents since we are shaping the future and the future is
supposed to expand wider then our knowledge not stay the same as our stereotypical
society. Parents are shaping gender roles at a young age influencing children to only fall
into their stereotypical gender that society has enforced and we have to change that. It
may not be in a day or even a year but as long as we keep pushing out knowledge about
gender and how society enforces gender we can have a future of no gender.

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Works Cited
Groner, Rachael, and John F. O'Hara. Composing Gender. Bosten/ New York: Leasa
Burtin, 2014. Print.