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Max

Research
Love is one of the most profound emotions known to human beings. For some, romantic
relationships are the most meaningful element in their lives, providing a source of fulfillment
outside of ourselves. But the ability to have a healthy, loving relationship is not all innate.
Failed relationships happen, and most of us have to work consciously to master the skills
necessary to make them flourish. The good news is that with effort and perseverance, you
can learn what you need to know to make your relationship last.

Nature doesnt make the human nature like this without a true cause. It happens so with a clear
purpose behind it and this is what I am going to be talking in this article today. I will illustrate
some of the reasons why were attracted not to everyone but with certain people and the things
that attract people to each other.
In one of my articles, why do we find some people attractive?, I explained how our cultures, our
emotional needs, environment and the circumstances in which we were brought up influence the
way we get attracted to others and the same reason behind these factors also influence our
connection with other people.

What attracts people to each other?


Knowing why we are attracted to certain people is not something that cant be learned or
understood by everyone. Its nothing more than examining our relationships with other people
and see how we benefit from them. But dont look any further because, in this article, I am going
to explain them to you, right?

Our physical appearances: During my research, I discovered that one of the factors
which greatly contributes as to why people get attracted to each other is our physical
appearance. This is the number one factor that makes us perceive others as interesting.
Its this same criterion that starts almost every relationship, if not all. Its true that not
everyone puts much emphasis on physical appearances, still its what draws the majority
of people to each other., I explained how a person can manipulate physical appearance
in different forms and postures to make someone finds him/her attractive even when they
never thought of it.
Nearness distance: Another factor that makes us attracted to others is the physical
proximity that we keep with the person. That is why when a student moves to another
school, he/she soon makes new friends because of the physical proximity that they share
daily and this is the same reason why we tend to find our neighbors and friends more
attractive due to the proximity level we have with them.

Max

The common interest we share: People can only be drawn or attracted to each other
when they share common interest and values. Until someone finds some common
interest that both of you can offer, else, they wont find you attractive/interesting. For
example, a student facing difficulties with a certain subject will automatically be attracted
to another good student in this subject because at least they share common interest. And
that is why we tend to be attracted to the people who possess what we need.
Attraction and criteria: Another important reason as to why people get attracted to each
other is when they match the list of qualifications stored in our minds calledsubconscious
criteria. When someone matches the greater percentage of these qualifications, we
automatically find the person as being interesting while on the other hand, if were in
search of a partner and found someone who does not match these criteria, automatically,
the person becomes disqualified even if they appeared to be loved by other people.
Attraction and Familiarity: Another factor that attracts people to each other is
familiarity. This is so because when we are searching for a friend or partner, we
unconsciously look for those who are familiar to us or resemble the people we love.
During this process, well not find someone attractive having contradictory values.

Final words on what attracts people to each other


Therere other minor factors that may cause people to become attracted to others, but for the
sake of time, I cut them down by just mentioning only the main factors. The above mentioned are
relevant because if you go deep into this topic, you will equally see that what is stated above are
the main facts.
The points mentioned could also be used to attract someone you love. So, if this is your case, all
you have to do is to adjust some of these influential factors until your victim is drawn to you,
right'.
Relationships exist on a spectrum, from healthy to unhealthy to abusive -- and everywhere in between. It can be
hard to determine where your relationship falls, especially if you havent dated a lot. Explore this section to learn
the basics of dating, healthy relationships and drawing the line before abuse starts.

Is My Relationship Healthy?
In a healthy relationship:

Your partner respects you and your individuality.

You are both open and honest.

Your partner supports you and your choices even when they disagree with you.

Both of you have equal say and respected boundaries.

Your partner understands that you need to study or hang out with friends or family.

You can communicate your feelings without being afraid of negative consequences.

Both of you feel safe being open and honest.

Max

A good partner is not excessively jealous and does not make you feel guilty when you spend time with family and
friends. A good partner also compliments you, encourages you to achieve your goals and does not resent your
accomplishments.

What makes a relationship successful?


1. Tell your partner you love them.
Although its true that actions speak louder than words, words often speak
more clearly than actions. Take a moment every now and then to verbalize your
feelings for your partner. A simple I love you or You mean the world to me can go
a long way towards making your significant other feel wanted, cared for, and secure
in your relationship.
2. Show some affection.
Small acts of physical intimacy the hand on the small of the back as you brush by
in the hallway, your arm around their shoulder on the sofa, your hand on their thigh
when seated side-by-side, holding hands while walking down the street give your
partner a warm feeling and convey the love and affection you feel for them. The
littlest touch can be as important, or evenmore important, than the longest night of
sexual intimacy.
3. Show appreciation for your partner.
Let your partner know on a regular basis what it is that you like most about them
what you admire, what makes you proud, what their strengths are in your eyes.
Building a romantic relationship isnt jsut about the initial bonding its about
encouraging and supporting each others growth over the course of your lives. Help
your partner achieve his or her potential by constantly building them up.

Max

4. Share yourself.
Dont keep your likes and dislikes, dreams and fears, achievements and mistakes, or
anything else to yourself. If its important to you, share it with your partner. More than
that, be sure to share more with your partner than you do with anyone else. While
there is certainly a need for some personal space in even the closest relationship,
give as much of yourself and your time as you can bear to your partner.

5. Be there for your partner.


Its obvious what you need to do when your partner faces a major life challenge like
the loss of a job or the death of a loved one. But its just as important to be
supportive when your partner faces lifes little challenges, too an argument at work,
a rough commute, a misplaced check. Dont let yourself be a doormat, and definitely
dont stand for physical or verbal abuse, but thicken your skin a little and be the voice
of calm and reason when chaos strikes. Listen to whats bothering them and offer
whatever help even if its just sympathy you can.

6. Give gifts.
Take advantages of opportunities to give material tokens of your love. Just the right
book picked up at the bookstore, a special dessert, a piece of jewelry or clothing you
noticed at the store anything small or large that tells them you were thinking of
them. Leave a love note for them, or send them an SMS at work to I love you
again, the little reminder that theyre always on your mind will help your partner feel
better about themselves and secure in your relationship.

Max

7. Respond gracefully to your partners demands and shortcomings.


A big killer of relationships is unreasonable expectations. Unless you married a
robot, your partner comes pre-loaded with a whole range of human failures and
foibles. These are features, not bugs! Learn to recognize and appreciate your
partners quirks for what they are: an essential part of who they are as people. Since
our weaknesses are often at the core of our deepest insecurities, make sure you
dont pick on or otherwise go out of your way to highlight your partners flaws.

8. Make "alone time" a priority.


No matter how busy both of your lives are, make sure you commit at least an
evening every week or two to be alone together. Have new experiences, share your
stories, and just generally enjoy each others company.

9. Take nothing for granted.


Cultivate a daily sense of gratitude for your partner and the thousands of little
blessings he or she has brought into your life. Remember that, if youre happy in
your relationship, your partner is doing a thousand little things for you every day to
make your relationship work (as, hopefully, you are for them). Never take that for
granted a relationship is work of the highest order, and the second you stop it
starts to slide away.

10. Strive for equality.


Make sure you follow the Golden Rule in your relationship: do unto your partner as
you would have done unto you. Strive for a fair division of household duties and

Max

other tasks, and dont expect or demand special considerations youd be unwilling to
offer in return.