Zachery Westdyke

EDUC 347
Connections Paper 1
With the unpredictable weather and copious amount of snow, I have only been to my
school placement once. However, that does not necessarily reflect how much I have experienced
during my time there. While I have learned a lot, there was one moment that I can think of that
relates to something we have already read about from Barbour et al. It relates to some of the
ideas presented in Chapter 10: Establishing and Maintaining Collaborative Relationships.
After the end of the school day, I spend about 15 minutes with Kim (my teacher
supervisor) discussing how the day went, how the kids are doing, things like that. During this
time, Kim talked to me a lot about one student in particular that I was working with that day.
The student (who I will refer to by the pseudonym J) has difficulty concentrating and sitting
still for any period of time longer than about 5 minutes. Most of my efforts during class time
were geared towards keeping him engaged with the assignment and lecture. J struggled to keep
his feet from tapping the floor or kicking the chair in front of him, and, on several occasions, J
even told me that he really couldnt sit down.
Immediately after school ended, Kim was speaking with another teacher who has J as a
student. They were explaining to me how they have been trying to get medication for J for
several months, and how his family has been largely unresponsive to their suggestions. They
said they have been back and forth with Js mother over e-mail and phone, but cannot seem to
meet with her in a face-to-face setting. This interaction immediately made me think of the
discussion we had in class about teacher-parent communication, and how to handle a situation
where the parent might be in disagreement with or unresponsive to the teachers suggestions.

I then wondered why Js mother might be unresponsive to several teachers advice, and it
reminded me of a quote from Barbour et al.: Some families may be working through the grief
that can accompany the realization that a child is going to require special care and services (pg.
294). Could this be the case with Js mother? In other words, is her external unresponsive
behavior simply a result of her internal struggle with accepting the idea that her son might have a
disability that is hindering his ability to learn? But, as Barbour et al. suggests, it is very
important to also consider factors in the teacher.
There are two very simple and immediate techniques that teachers can use to improve
communication with parents. One is to ask instead of tell. The other is to listen instead of talk
(pg. 295). This quote from Barbour et al. made me wonder about the way in which Kim and her
colleague have been approaching Js mother about their concern. While I trust that Kim isnt
telling anyone to do anything, there are no doubt teachers who might. And it should be pretty
clear why a parent might be much less responsive towards a teacher who is telling them to do
something. Overall, this experience has demonstrated the fragility of teacher-parent
relationships, and how careful a teacher must be in choosing their words in order to foster a
collaborative as opposed to competitive relationship.

Reference
Barbour, C., Barbour, N. H., Scully, P. A. (2011). Families, schools, and communities: Building
partnerships for educating children (5th ed.). Upper Saddle River, NJ: Pearson
Education, Inc.