Coweta County

Newsleader
MASSIVE FIRE IN MONTERAY, CA
Saturday, April 13, 2017 McGraw/Hill
International (a key player in the
standardized testing industry) experienced
expensive property damage due to a fire that
began late last Friday evening. Police
officers now suspect that the fire was
intentionally caused and are looking for two
young men of medium height and body who
were sought leaving the scene of the crime.
Luckily no employees of McGraw/Hill were
harmed. However, thousands of important
documents and testing supplies for
upcoming standardized test were kept within
the walls of McGraw Hills home office in
Monteray.
WEEKLY OBITUARIES
Standardized testing, age 52, of Washington
D.C. died tragically in the plane crash of
flight 447 en route to Los Angeles,
California on Sunday November 9, 2017.
The funeral arrangements will be made by
Stewart Funeral Home, details of funeral to
follow. Please direct all condolences to 1600
Pennsylvania Ave, Washington D.C.

Student Apathy, age 47, of Radnor,

Pennsylvania died tragically in the plane
crash of flight 447 en route to Los Angeles,
California on Sunday November 9, 2017.
The funeral arrangements will be made by
Donohue Funeral Home (Wayne, PA),
details of funeral to follow. Please direct all
condolences to 20 Ryan Ranch Road,
Monterey, CA.
83 YEAR OLD MAN SURVIVES
PLANE CRASH
Accurate Assessment, age 83, of Riceville,
Iowa boarded flight 447 from Washington
D.C. to Los Angeles, California on Sunday
November 9, 2017, and just as every other
passenger he was assured the flight would
be clear and without trouble. When the plane
reached climbing altitude the passengers
began to feel some turbulence but the
captain came over the intercom system and
assured them that it was nothing to worry
about. I can remember the captain telling us
that we were in for a small storm up ahead
and to make sure our seatbelts were
fastened, Assessment said. Little did
Accurate Assessment know that the storm
would bring the plane down in a small
Kansas town several hours from Topeka.
Assessment was one of many survivors in
the plane crash that day. Miraculously, there
were only two men who died in the crash of
flight 447 and the current investigators now
posit that those two men, one Standardized
Testing of Washington D.C. and one Student
Apathy of Radnor, Pennsylvania, were killed
because of their failure to follow the pilots
instructions. The flight 447s pilot, Loveof
Learning, said of the unfortunate deaths,
Its really upsetting about Standardized

Testing and Student Apathy. I express my

deepest condolences to each of their families
and all of their friends. If I had that day to

do over again I would remind each of those

men to fasten their seatbelts as we flew into
that storm.