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Running head: SIBLING RIVALRY 1

Cause and Effect of Sibling Rivalry


Riley Clifford
First Colonial Student
December 17, 2014

SIBLING RIVALRY 2
Abstract
Roughly, every human who grew up in the world with a sibling can advocate that there is
no stopping sibling rivalry. Humans are born with the natural instinct to ceate and resolve
conflicts. With this instinct results the tension between siblings. There are numerous reasons
behind sibling rivalry occurring and most cases revolve around jealousy and the need for
attention. The will to be unique, along with the constant jealousy and attention seeking creates
the sibling rivalry. Everyday actions and the way the family acts also influence the behavior of
the children toward each other. With every cause comes an effect and with sibling rivalry there
are positive and negative effects. Fortunately, the results are typically positive and positive
relationships emerge, but there are certain cases where negative results show. There is no
avoiding the rivalry and parents may do their best to dull the root of the problem but in the end
the rivalry and struggle is often worth the positive relationship.
Keywords: sibling, rivalry, jealousy, attention, fighting

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Cause and Effect of Sibling Rivalry
I wish I was an only child. Why does my younger sister get more freedom then I do,
or even more aggressive statements like My older brother is being such an asshole today are all
phrases that can be heard from the mouth of a child with one or more siblings. Any person who
grew up with a sibling, I am sure can attest to the fact that sibling conflict or rivalry is a large
part of a siblings relationship. The tension and physical or emotional conflict is inevitable for
several reasons. The jealousy, uniqueness, attention factor, and family life are all aspects that
contribute to sibling rivalry, and with every cause there is an effect. The continuous sibling
rivalry produces positive benefits, positive relationships and a unique life. The negative
outcomes are bad relationships or underachievement in life.
Why do Siblings Fight
Children are competitive beings and focus, primarily, on equality and the actions of their
brothers and sisters. The causes are impossible to prevent, however sibling rivalry is not always a
bad thing. The instinctive, competitive factor often gives children with sibling rivalries an edge,
if used correctly. Saying this, siblings battle head to head or through their parents as sign of
jealousy, inattentiveness, or just pure nature.
Jealousy is the driving factor in almost all mental conflicts that occur in the household.
Often, a child believes that his or her brother or sister is better, smarter, funnier, more driven, or
will have more overall success in life and that causes tension in a childs mind. One child may
be looked at as the golden child and the idea of having a sibling who outshines him or her as
an individual triggers the competitive nature, thus resolving in some form of conflict, such as
physical encounters.

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Along with jealousy is attention. Attention comes into play from the aspect of how the
child feels the parent treats him or her in a relation to the siblings. Often, a parent, whether they
mean to or not, gives more attention to one child than another. This can be seen in a situation
where a three or four year old is dissatisfied with an upcoming baby because the young child is
receiving less attention. The quote, Why does my younger sister get more freedom then I do is
an example of how children feel less attention and that sense of less attention causes aggravation.
Loss of attention can also lead to a childs attempt to gain attention, such as starting a fight with
another sibling or teasing.
Each child is competing to define who they are, they try to find their own talents,
activities, and interest. They want to show that they are unique (Boyse, 2014). This quote
exemplifies another factor of sibling rivalry, individuality or uniqueness. It is part of a way to
stand out. All siblings want to be different in their own way whether it is playing a different
sport or living a separate lifestyle. Several families contain an athlete, a scholar, or maybe a
socializer. Point is, siblings develop their own expertise to stand out and this competition creates
tension and conflicts between siblings.
The dynamics of the family household are influencing factors on the behavior of children.
If the children become bored, stressed, hungry, irritated, etc. then their natural will to tease and
stir up fights will increase. Also, the behavior of their role models affect their ability to resolve
fights. If parents of children yell a lot or a family member they see a lot yells or supports
physical behavior then fighting will occur more frequently.
Outcomes of Sibling Rivalry
Sibling rivalry is within just about every household that contains two or more children
and the degree of which the rivalry occurs may be a positive influence or a negative one.

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Childhood is the building blocks of life and it is the time when personality and character
develop, which makes the effects of sibling rivalry that much more important. Child rivalries are
most relevant when the siblings are close in age. As children, the minds of siblings are premature
and their actions demonstrate the fact. However, once their mind matures, siblings often bond off
of their childish relationships and the many fights that occurred in their childhood.
The positive influences of sibling rivalry are individuality and positive relationships. The
constant bickering and battling tends to ease as siblings grow up and they begin to appreciate
each other more and more likely than not, a positive relationship evolves. Also, with the several
years of rivalry comes the skill to deal and cooperate with other points of view or personality,
which can be vital in certain aspects of life. Aside from a positive relationship, it enables
children in a family to explore different areas of expertise. One may grow up and be an
outdoorsy type, while the other is a city dweller that loves working, or even an author.
Unfortunately, to every positive there is a negative and in this situation there are two
large negative effects. First, there may be a bad relationship. A loss of communication or overall
neglect may form if the sibling rivalry as children carries over into adulthood. Also, sibling
rivalry may cause underachievement. With an older or younger sibling who is far more
successful than the other, that sibling may fall far short of the life they planned on and seem
useless compared to their sibling.
Conclusion
Every parent with more than one child has at some point experienced the agony of sibling
rivalry in the household. It is an inevitable situation but can only be handled once it arises. The
causes of attention, jealousy, uniqueness, and family life create much of the battle that occurs.
Fortunately, mostly good evolves from the competitive nature of sibling rivalry but there is a

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chance it may have a negative impact on a person for the rest of their lives. Ones brothers and
sisters are some of the most important and influential people in their lives and the years of battle
often result in an everlasting, loving relationship.

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References
Boyse, K., R.N. (2014). University of Michigan Health System. Retrieved December 11, 2014,
from http://www.med.umich.edu/yourchild/topics/sibriv.htm
Negative Effects of Sibling Rivalry. (2008, December 07). Retrieved December 15, 2014, from
http://www.thelaoroflove.com/articles/negative-effects-of-sibling-rivalry
Pendley, J. S. (2012, August 01). Sibling Rivalry. Retrieved from
http://kidshealth.org/parent/positive/family/sibling_rivalry.html#
Rimm, S., Ph. D. (n.d.). The Effects of Sibling Competition. Retrieved from
http://windows.microsoft.com/en-us/internet-explorer/ie-9-welcome-upgrade.3
Sibling Rivalry and Other Sister-Brother Problems. (n.d.). Retrieved December 15, 2014, from
http://www.webmd.com/parenting/guide/sibling-rivalry?page=3

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