DECONSTRUCTING

YOUR
ANALYSIS ESSAY

English III
Mrs.
Oualline &
Coach Svien

THE RUBRIC
Your essay was scored based on the following criteria:
THESIS STATEMENT (10 points)
TOPIC SENTENCES (10 points)
EXAMPLES (30 points)
QUALITY OF ANALYSIS (30 points)
CORRECTNESS OF STYLE (20 points)

Today, you are going to DECONSTRUCT and SCORE

your own essay based on the RUBRIC.

THESIS STATEMENTS
First we are going to take a look at your THESIS
STATEMENT.
Highlight your thesis PINK.
Now READ THROUGH YOUR THESIS looking for the
following:
The authors name and the title of the work
F. Scott Fitzgerald
The Great Gatsby

A thematic idea
Hope, Carelessness, Honesty, Etc.

A statement of THEME

THESIS STATEMENTS
Here are some really good examples:
In The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald presents the idea
that hope drives a person to do great things, but it may
also set a person up for great disappointment.
In The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald suggests that
distrust can cause a person to damage close relationships
which can eventually lead to a lonely existence.
In The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald suggests that the
obsession with a single dream can eventually lead a person
to disillusionment and ruin.

THESIS STATEMENTS
Here are some really good examples:
In The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald presents the idea
that hope drives a person to do great things, but it may
also set a person up for great disappointment.
In The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald suggests that
distrust can cause a person to damage close relationships
which can eventually lead to a lonely existence.
In The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald suggests that the
obsession with a single dream can eventually lead a person
to disillusionment and ruin.
The title of the
novel is underlined
or italicized.

THESIS STATEMENTS
Here are some really good examples:
In The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald presents the idea
that hope drives a person to do great things, but it may
also set a person up for great disappointment.
In The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald suggests that
distrust can cause a person to damage close relationships
which can eventually lead to a lonely existence.
In The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald suggests that the
obsession with a single dream can eventually lead a person
to disillusionment and ruin.
The name of the
author is
included.

THESIS STATEMENTS
Here are some really good examples:
In The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald presents the idea
that hope drives a person to do great things, but it may
also set a person up for great disappointment.
In The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald suggests that
distrust can cause a person to damage close relationships
which can eventually lead to a lonely existence.
In The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald suggests that the
obsession with a single dream can eventually lead a person
to disillusionment and ruin.
The statement
includes a clear
thematic idea.

THESIS STATEMENTS
Here are some really good examples:
In The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald presents the idea
that hope drives a person to do great things, but it may
also set a person up for great disappointment.
In The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald suggests that
distrust can cause a person to damage close relationships
which can eventually lead to a lonely existence.
In The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald suggests that the
obsession with a single dream can eventually lead a person
to disillusionment and ruin.
Includes a FULL
statement of theme
connecting to a
universal message

THESIS STATEMENTS
Now evaluate your THESIS STATEMENT
based on the following rubric:

Excellent

Generic

No
Thematic
Statement

No Thesis

TOPIC SENTENCES
Each BODY PARAGRAPH should have a TOPIC
SENTENCE, the mini-thesis stating the purpose of
the paragraph.
Highlight your topic sentences BLUE.

TOPIC SENTENCES
Here is an example using the topic sentence format
that I gave you in class:
1. In the story, the character of Gatsby is hopeful.
#
2. Gatsby, however, never realizes that his hopefulness will
#
eventually lead to his own downfall.

TOPIC SENTENCES
Here is an example using the topic sentence format
that I gave you in class:
1. In the story, the character of Gatsby is hopeful.
#

Thematic
idea from
thesis

2. Gatsby, however, never realizes that his hopefulness will

#
eventually lead to his own downfall.
Statement of
THEME from thesis.

TOPIC SENTENCES
But you could also construct unique topic sentences
to fi t your essay and writing style.
1. Gatsbys obsession transcends reality, and his dream
version of Daisy can never live up to the real Daisy.
#
2. Gatsbys inability to diff erentiate between his dream and
#
reality leads to great disappointment and, ultimately, his
death.

TOPIC SENTENCES
But you could also construct unique topic sentences
to fi t your essay and writing style.
Thematic idea from
thesis
reality, and his dream
1. Gatsbys obsession transcends
version of Daisy can never live up to the real Daisy.
#
2. Gatsbys inability to diff erentiate between his dream and
#
reality leads to great disappointment and, ultimately, his
death.
Statement of
THEME from thesis.

TOPIC SENTENCES
Now evaluate your TOPIC SENTENCES
based on the following rubric:

Excellent

Generic

Not
Connected
to Thesis

No Topic
Sentences

EXAMPLES
You should have chosen EXAMPLES from the novel
that are RELEVANT to your topic.
You also should have included CONTEXT for each
example.
Highlight your context Yellow and examples GREEN.

EXAMPLES
Here are some examples of INEFFECTIVE use of
context and direct quotation for your essay examples:
In Chapter Six, Gatsby reveals that he wants to repeat the
past. Cant repeat the past? he cried incredulously. Why
of course you can! (110).

Ineffective REPETITION.
The quotation is NOT EMBEDDED.

EXAMPLES
Here are some examples of INEFFECTIVE use of
context and direct quotation for your essay examples:
In Chapter Six, Daisy attends Gatsbys party. She doesnt
like it. She is really bored. This upsets Gatsby. He wanted
nothing less of Daisy than that she should go to Tom and
say: I never loved you. After she had obliterated four
years with that sentence they could decide upon the more
practical measures to be taken. One of them was that, after
she was free, they were to go back to Louisville and be
married from her housejust as if it were fi ve years before
(109).

The context is TOO WORDY.

The quotation is TOO LONG.
The quotation is NOT EMBEDDED.

EXAMPLES
Now, an example of HIGHLY EFFECTIVE use of context
and embedded quotation:
After Daisy and Tom attend the party at Gatsbys house,
Gatsby is melancholy. He desperately wants Daisy to
[obliterate] four years with Tom so that he and Daisy could
go back to Louisville and be married in her housejust as if
it were fi ve years before (Fitzgerald 109).
The context is brief, but provides the relevant information
necessary to put the quotation into context.
The quotation is cut down and embedded into the natural
sentence structure of the essay.
The flow from context to direct quotation is smooth and
seamless.

EXAMPLES
Now score your EXAMPLES based on
the following rubric:

Excellent

Good, but
not
embedded

Ineffective

Completely
disconnect
ed from
topic

QUALITY OF ANALYSIS
(COMMENTARY)
After EACH EXAMPLE, you
should include COMMENTARY.
The purpose of commentary is
to explain the CONNECTION
between your specifi c
examples and your thesis.
Highlight all of your
commentary ORANGE.
You should have more ORANGE
than you do GREEN.

QUALITY OF ANALYSIS
(COMMENTARY)
Here are some examples of INEFFECTIVE commentary.

In Chapter Six, Gatsby reveals that he wants to repeat the

past. Cant repeat the past? he cried incredulously. Why
of course you can! (110). This shows how Gatsby wants
to repeat the past.

The commentary is WAY TOO BRIEF.

The commentary merely REPEATS the
quotation.

QUALITY OF ANALYSIS
(COMMENTARY)
Now, an example of HIGHLY EFFECTIVE use of commentary:
After Daisy and Tom attend the party at Gatsbys house, Gatsby is
melancholy. He desperately wants Daisy to [obliterate] four years
with Tom so that he and Daisy could go back to Louisville and be
married in her housejust as if it were fi ve years before (Fitzgerald
109).
Gatsby spends so much time and energy imagining a life with Daisy
that he fails to realize that Daisy has her own life. His unwillingness
to see her as a person with a life beyond a one-month romance
makes the success of the current relationship impossible. Gatsby is
not content with Daisy loving him or wanting to create a life with
him in the present because he is consumed by his desire to
recapture the past.
This commentary is thorough and fully explores the quotation
provided.
The commentary is longer than the quotation.

QUALITY OF ANALYSIS
(COMMENTARY)
Now evaluate the ANALYSIS or
COMMENTARY based on the rubric:

Excellent

Generic

Too brief

Off Topic

CORRECTNESS OF STYLE
The last element you need to evaluate is your:

Grammar
Usage
Punctuation
Spelling

Mark any errors you fi nd in your essay.

CORRECTNESS OF STYLE
Now score the STYLE of your essay
based on the following rubric:

YOUR SCORE
Based on the rubric, what do you think
your scores SHOULD BE?
Add up all of the points to determine
your estimated grade for this essay.
How did you do?

YOUR (ACTUAL) SCORE

Hopefully you have LEARNED SOMETHING from this
process.
If you LEARNED SOMETHING, then you are
SUCCESSFUL.
However, if you received a FAILING GRADE, then
take this opportunity to come in and rewrite your
essay. Using what you have learned, your NEW
ESSAY should be much better.