FHM Philippines - January 2016

JAN UARY 2016 www.fhm.com.
ph
THE NO. 1 MAGAZINE IN

THE PHILIPPINES
#fhmjennylynisthesexiest
THE NEW
SHARING ECONOMY:
RIDE UBER/
LIVE IN AIRBNB
COMEDIANS
OF THE OLD SCHOOL
GROUND RULES
FOR SEXUAL CONDUCT
GENTLEMEN 2.0
the sexiest
{& fittest}
in the land
99 7701
770111 99 768009
768009
18 + Con t e n t s A R e no t sui tA bl e f oR minoRs
getting better each time
12
12
mercado
P150
ISSN
ISSN 0119-7681
0119-7681
jennylyn
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c o nt ents 0 1 / 1 6
56 SHARE A CAR/HOUSE,
EARN EXTRA CASH.
The new entrepreneurial
philosophy driving
Uber and Airbnb thats
disrupting the business
status quo.
60 DUDE FROM THE

80S VS. THE
MILLENNIAL BRO
Who's got more appeal? We
let the girls decide.
64 CLOWNS FROM THE

OLD CARNIVAL
Kids, meet Long Mejia,
Dennis Padilla, and Jimmy
Santos. Your rents thought
they were a riotyou
should, too.
36
JEN N Y LY N
M ERCA DO
T he c ou nt r y's
s ex ie st
s hows of f her
t r iu mph a nt
for m
72 THE DEFINITIVE
RULES OF THE MATING
GAME
Because we are doomed to
always chase after women,
weve compiled yet another
set of maxims for sexual
conductand this time
were setting them in stone.
76 MAN TEST
Lets see how the youngest
Medina would fare in the
ultimate hombre test.
78 MAYUMI YOKOYAMA
We pick another fragile
cherry blossom from the
Land of the Rising Sun.
84 SHANE RAMOS
Former Wowowillie dancer
knows how to make her
first time bigtime
P H OTO G R A P H Y : M A R K N I C DAO , C H A R LE S B U E N C O N S E J O
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JANUARY 2016 FH M 5
STA RT E R
LO U N G E
Youll probably spend more

time staring at her eyes
than anywhere else.
Trust us, heres the landian

cheat sheet you should
tattoo on you.
18 INFOGRAPHICS
26 ANIMAL SEX
We deal with deathor how

close you might have come
to meeting him head-on.
Learn the feral ways of

dogs, monkeys, bats, cats,
snails and more!
20 NEW YEAR FIX
28 LADIES
CONFESSIONS
16 LISA DILLON
How to: clean up postfireworks mess; stretch a

holiday-strained budget;
recover from gluttony;
catch up on sleep.
23 BAR ROOM JOKES

In the bag this month:
gags in story form, quick
standup punchlines, and
#hugot.
24 FLIRT4REAL
Intimate stories you want

her to whisper in your ear.
AC C ES S
30 READS FOR GOOD

BEGINNINGS
A checklist of paperbacks to
start the year right.
32 WILL SMITH
Here's another Will
Smith starrer to hope an
award for. Catch him in
Concussion.
6 FH M JANUARY 2016
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33 CHEATS
The band with Saab
Magalona in it are doing
Singapores Laneway
Festival this year!
34 GAMING MADNESS
2016
With many good titles out
this year, you can quit real
life and you won't miss a
thing...
STYLE
89 JOGGERS' DELIGHT
RRJ offers a respite from
jeans
UPGRADE
100 HEALTHY EATS

AT YOUR DOOR
What saved our lives
this month: food delivery
options that arent burger
and fries.
104 HOW I DID IT

Rakista.com founder Harold
Solomon on using tech to
rock.
106 HOT METAL

New Year means new
gearhere's what's good
108 FORD FOCUS
90 NIGHT FURY
Empty streets. Mad street
style. Uy, hipster!
GIRLF RIE ND
The new Ford Focuss turbo

boost.
110 GEEK
96 MICHIKO MAGNO
We consult our 4K
resolution crystal ball for
the years tech trends
Filipino-Japanese-Korean.
Shes every bit an Asian babe.
112 TRUE!
Major flubs, disclosed.
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P H O T O G R A P H Y : I V E S T R U O N G , H E I D I A Q U E N D E , A R T U N E P U M U C E N O ; I L L U S T R AT I O N S : A J B E R N A R D O
c o n te n ts 01 / 1 6
T H E TEAM: WHAT FHM ers HAVE BEEN U P TO T HI S M ON T H
The timeless
Jennylyn Mercado
had us all seeing red
during her fourth
cover shootwere
still waiting for
the blood to come
back down from our
noggins!
December cover girl Kim Domingo

stopped by the office to spread
some holiday cheer and souvenir
photos
The annual team FHM kris kringle! This years haul features
makeup, cat food, multiple sets of cleaning essentials, a
very long belt, and one desk fan with LED lights and a USB
charging outlet!
BAs brood with Tito Bitoy! Okay,

hes not really their ninong but hes
obviously kid-trained from his yaya
to Angelina days...
Ash puts his height to
practical use: by being a
human lightstand for the
months editorial.
Top Gear vs FHM 2 : Beer

Pong. Were happy to say that
our winstreak against our
motoring friends continues!
Style editor
Ash pays for
taking all those
sleeping-onthe-job-photos
of the staff by
being caught in
one of his own.
Zzz.
Publisher Aeus enjoys the

seasons climes during Mr. and
Mrs. Cristobals Tagaytay wedding.
Mabuhay ang bagong kasal !
8 FH M JANUARY 2016
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I S B R O U G H T T O Y O U B Y. . .
Team Editor Allan A. Madrilejos
Managing Editor Allan P. Hernandez
Art Director Paul C. Villariba
Associate Art Director John Laurence O. Patulan
Senior Features Editor Khyne L. Palumar
Assistant Style Editor Mikey Ashlie L. Mahinay
Editorial Assistants, Pong M. Castillo, Chise A. Alcantara
Celebrity Coordinator Allan Altera
A N D F U T U R E - P R O O F E D B Y. . .
Managing Editor BA Borleo
Associate Section Editor Gelo G. Gonzales
Senior Staff Writer Ron Jay B. Eduvas
Staff Writer Neps N. Firmalan, John Paulo Aguilera, Mary Rose A.
Hogaza
Video Production Specialist Engelheart V. Jarilla
WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM...
Words Mary Rose Hogaza, Wayne Joseph Tulio, Paulo Aguilera,
Abby Mendoza, Anton D. Umali, Cam Arcilla, Toni Antiporda, Vince Sales,
Illustrations Louis Arenas, Aj Bernardo, Melvin Calingo, Carlo Maala.
Gilbert Daroy Pictures Dondee Quincena, Heidi Aquende, Jerico Montemayor,
Mark Nicdao, Paul Mondok, Charles Buenconsejo, Ejay Leung, Mark Jesalva,
Artu Nepomuceno, Aaron Ebio Styling/Makeup/Hair Vanessa Michelle,
Genie Ranada-Babista, J-Em Sta. Ana, Rhina Montemayor, Georm Imperial,
Aj Alberto, John Valle, Cristine Duque, Debra Bernales, Janina Dizon, MJ Rone,
Iya Yujuico, Gela Munoz, Patrick Ebio, Julie Ebio,
F H M I N T E R N AT I O N A L N E T W O R k
International Director Simon Greves International Digital Director
Gary Broughton International General Manager Mark Beard
International Digital Manager Graham Kirk International Content
Executive Ryan Chambers International Digital & Content Executive
Erin Viljoen International Technical Administrator John Goodchild
International Editors (Australia) Guy Mosel, (China) Jacky Jin, (Czech
Republic) Dalibor Demel, (France) Laurent Giraud, (Germany) Hans Fuchs,
(Holland) Sander Kersten, (India) Kabeer Sharma, (Indonesia) Richard
Sam Bera, (Latvia) Sandris Metuzals, (Malaysia) Rajesh Taluar, (Norway)
Martin Thronsen, (Philippines) Allan Madrilejos, (Romania) Paul Breazu,
(Russia) Slava Rovner, (Singapore) David Fuhrmann Lim, (Slovenia) Uros
Majcenovic, (South Africa) Hagen Engler, (Spain) Rafael Benitez, (Taiwan)
Saffron Lee, (Thailand) Jakaphatchara Buranabutr, (Turkey) Berk Iybar,
(UK) Joe Barnes
SUMMIT MEDIA
President Lisa Gokongwei-Cheng Publisher Edna T. Belleza
VP for Operations Hansel dela Cruz Junior Associate Publisher
Aeus Kevin Reyes Digital Publisher Adel De Jesus Deputy Group
Digital Publisher Amina Rillo Web Business Operations Manager
Dennison Ko Web Programmer Christopher Porto Production
Director Elizabeth Rellis Assistant Production Manager Jane M. Puno
Production Coordinator Arnel Laigo Production Graphic Artist Louis
Arenas Administrative Services Manager Whilma M. Lopez Admin
Assistants Michiel Lumabi, Marlyn Miguel
ADVERTISING
Group Advertising Director Florence Bienvenido Adv. Director-key
Accounts Group Regie Uy Adv. Mangers Maiza G. Mueco key Account
Specialists Joey Anciano, Junn de las Alas, Alex Revelar,
Annie Santos, Suzette Tolentino Senior Account Manager (Print)
Ginger Taduran, Bem Caharian, JJ Dinglasan Senior Account Manager
(Digital) Lucas Reyes Junior Account Managers (Print) Melinda
Kitane-San Diego, Junior Account Managers (Digital) Onnie Del
Mundo, Dianne Suegay, Angela Lagahid, Adv. Executive Assistant
Rita Barbacena key Accounts Assistants Maricel Adaniel, Ashley Balla,
Chinggay M. Cabit Adv. Assistants Lorena Santiago
Adv. Traffic Supervisors Eliziel del Rio, Myra Gorospe
E V E N T S D E PA R T M E N T
Assistant Marketing Manager: Leah H. Basco Jr. Marketing
Associates: Sirius Langkay, Gladys Lapitan, Siena Mirano,
Kieffer Albert Nonato, Abigail Pinili
M E D I A R E L AT I O N S
Media Relations Manager Grace Enriquez Media Relations
Associate Nicole David
TRADE MARkETING
Trade Marketing Officer Candace Lobendino Sr. Trade Marketing
Associates Caz Marino Trade Marketing Associate Kamille Guirnalda
Trade Marketing Ass. Jamie Islo, Angelica Anne Casacop, Daryl Lincod
Jr. Trade Marketing Project Coordinator Patric Malicdem
C R E AT I V E S O L U T I O N S
Team Art Director Jaykee Evangelista Copywriter Miguel Escobar
Digital Art Director Rey Etable Associate Art Director Jerome de Dios
Carlo Maala Senior Web Designer Teddy Garcia Producer Tara Llavore
C I R C U L AT I O N
Circulation Manager Alma M. Madelo Deputy National Circulation
Manager Glenda Gil Circulation Manager-GMA Alaine Mae Lozada
Provincial Sales Manager Alexis Martinez International Distribution
Specialist Ulyssis Javier Distributors Group Head Caroline Herrera
key Accounts Group Head Malou Rubinos Subscriptions Group
Head Hanna Montecer Circulation Supervisor Mary Fatima Flores
Systems Administrator - Interactive Editions Rico Cruz, Ron Silang
key Accounts SpecialistVivian Manahan, Charlotte Barlis, Noreen
Sescon-Peligro, Jinky Rose Calugtong, Jennifer Tolentino, Jenny Reparep,
Lhon Bituin, Nathaniel Embiado, Felix Tong II Distributor SpecialistNorth Luzon Mark Elliot Villola Distributor Specialist-Central Luzon
Gian Carlo Peralta Distributor Specialist-Central Visayas Robert
Revilla Distributor Specialist-Western Visayas Ivan Dela Pena
Distributor Specialist-Central Mindanao Eric Ferdinand Gasatan
Newsstands Supervisor Joel Valdez Sales Representative-GMA
John Lakhi Celso, Edward Caringal, Anjelyn Joy Carino Subscription
Coordinator Jofet Abad-Legaspi, Joyce Ann Ramos, Raquel Lorenzo
Distribution Account Analyst May Ann Ayuste Circulation
Administrative Assistant Marjorie Abueme Circulation
Administrative Assistant Elnie Marie Santos Export Sales Assistant
Legui Brylle Gonzales Telemarketer Michelle Jayin, Ruby Rose Frias
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letterS 01/16
Get in touch!
FaCebook.Com/
Fhm.Ph
ins tagR am@

FhmPhiloFFiCial
tWitteR.Com/
FhmPhil
Fhm@summitmedia.
Com.Ph
6F & 7F Robinsons
CybeRgate CenteR
toWeR 3 PioneeR
ComPlex, PioneeR st.,
mandaluyong City 1550
wow!
KI MTA S T I C
!
B A BY
VERY ARTSY
Heres a picture of my
artwork and the magazine.
Jion Raqzle Sobida
Orquilla, via email
KIM, HES
CALLING YOU
Pa-autograph naman, Kim!

Antonino Benavidez, via
email
B EST O F 2 0 15
I felt very happy when I saw the legendary
Ina Raymundo headlining your November
issue during my birthday month. I think
your December issue with Kim Domingo (who
I saw at BroCon), is the #BestIssueOf2015.
Aside from Kim you featured #DessertDuo
and August & September Hotties Karen
Punzalan and Hazel Cha, as well as Sponsor
babes Dasuri Choi, Divine Smith, Lhea
Bernardino, and Rachel Anne Daquis. All of
them are the #BOMB! But wait, you forgot to
feature March and June Hotties Tricia Santos
10 FH M JANUARY 2016
GREAT BUYS
and Mayumi Yokoyama, so I do hope the two

will grace your covers some month in 2016,
and Coleen Garcia and Julie Anne San Jose
for the 16th Anniversary issue in March.
You made 2015 very special to me when
FHM #NewCrush Angels and the best Hotties
assembled, from Yuri Choii to Kimberlee
Arcillas. Thanks and more power FHM, and
have a great year ahead!
Good evening! Share ko

lang po itong nabili ko.
Hay, Kim Domingo
Czeon Santos, via
Facebook
P.S. Special shoutout to Jean Saturnino!

Jigz, via email
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fhmphilofficial
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STACK IT UP!
YOUR NAMES RHYME! #JenKen
Supportive wife here! My husband Ken Gementiza is a

certified FHM fan will be celebrating his birthday this coming
December 25. I hope you could post this on your next issue.
This will surely surprise him. Happy birthday, Dada! We love
you! Thank you so much and more power!
Jen, via email
GREAT FINDS
Nahanap ko sa cabinet,
ha ha!
Christian Dignadice, via
Facebook
HONEYKOY
Ive been a fan since 2004

and I see to it that I get a
copy every month. My hubby
and I will be celebrating our
first wedding anniversary
on December 8 and I want
to surprise him. I hope
to see our picture. Happy
Anniversary, HoneyKoy! I
love you to the moon and
back!
Mayette De Pedro, via
email
www.fhm.com.ph
Just want to share how

the spines of my 3-year
FHM collection look like.
Looking forward to another
year of surprises with you!
Also hoping that HBD girl,
Patricia Tumulak, will grace
your cover. Happy New Year!
Jay El Cortez, via email
WHO THE HELL

IS THAT?
FEED YOUR MIND

This is how we read FHM
at Fitness Unlimited!
Shoutout to our coaches,
staff,and members! Happy
New Year!
John Chan, via email
YOURE MY
INSPIRATION
BAWAL MADAMOT!
HIS SUPERGIRL
Ive been collecting your

magazine for almost two
years now dahil sa ayaw
ipahiram sakin ng tropa
ko yung mga FHM niya.
Eight years na siyang
nangongolekta. Mga babies
daw niya yung mga yun.
Anyway, heres a picture
of us in Christmas Village,
hope you can include it.
Thanks FHM! More power!
Fernando Estuesta, via
Facebook
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I want to greet my girlfriend

a happy birthday. She is my
motivation and inspiration.
I love you so much. Thanks
FHM.
Rand Sebastian, via email
Good looks? I dont seem

to have that. Money? Just
enough to grab you a
sundae float. But I promise, I
will always look at you with
as much love and excitement
as I did the first time I saw
youthe first time I fell in
love with you, my forever
crush. My Christmas wish is
to tell this to the entire FHM
nation.
Arlex Tipgos, via email
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fhmphilofficial
This photo was taken last

year at our Fish Show
at Robinsons Magnolia.
I actually know this girl
personally because
she happens to be my
schoolmate at PSBA-QC.
Shes one of the models
of our Stingray Division
Unfortunately, when we
had this picture, that
guy behind us looks like
he really wanted to get
between us.
Perpetuo Amor Cruz
Cabaccangm via Facebook
FRIENDS DAW...
My friends Birthday is
coming up on January 12,
and it has always been her
dream to see her picture in
FHM. I hope matupad ko
ang wish niya. This is my
message to her: Cele, this
is it! Making my promise
come to life, ha ha. Happy
birthday! Sana napasaya
kita sa gift ko. Thanks FHM!
Eizel Fuentebella, via
email
JANUARY 2016 FH M 11
BOOM!
Enter a fun year bursting with colors! Come play with Venicia, Yassi, Hedem, Nika, Shane,
and Jelai as they sweeten up the pages of the 2016 PREMIERE Condoms Calendar.
Bounce around with the babes who know exactly how to brighten up your year.
PREMIERE
EARTHQUAKE
Vibrating O-ring for

earth-shattering
experience.
PREMIERE DOTTED
PREMIERE CRUISE
CONTROL
Condoms with raised

pleasure dots for a more
intense experience.
PREMIERE NICE & TIGHT

Condoms lubricated with
SENSITIGHT TM that helps
create a tightening
effect on women.
Condoms with a special

additive to prolong
performance.
PREMIERE ULTRA THIN

Ultra Thin condoms for a
more sensitive feel.
STARTER
Wi s d o M Yo u
s H o u l d nt
l e ave H o M e
Wit H o ut
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u
p
s
e
y
E
e
e
r
H ,
y
s
o
B
Giselle Pia is a study in the
appreciation of genetics
Were not into hyperbole

around here, but halfGerman model Lisa Dillon
has some of the loveliest
lookers weve ever seenthe color of
her irises, the shape of her lids, its
crazy. Lisa thinks we should stop
staring at our smartphones in 2016,
and were inclined to do exactly that.
As long as were around her, of course.
photography:
DONDEE QUINCENA
interview:
ASH MAHINAY
styling:
VANESSA MICHELLE
www.fhm.com.ph
What are your New Years

resolutions for 2016?
My New Years resolutions are to
read more and spend less time on
social media.
Its a good resolution to have. What
did you notice yourself doing that
made you want to cut back on social
media?
Its important for me as a model, but I
noticed I was on it more than I needed
to be!
Do you think people need to lessen
their use of social media in general?
I think it depends on the person. As
I said, for me, it helps my modeling
career but I know that I have a life
other than Instagram and I remember
to put it down to spend time with those
that I love.
Where are you going to be for
the festivities? Do you go for the
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big parties or a more intimate

celebration?
Im more of an intimate celebration type
of girla few of my close friends and
family is all I need to have a great time.
Does this mean you arent the typical
party girl that people like to think all
models are? Whats a night out like?
I like a good party here and there but
Id rather just have a hang sesh with
some friends.
What are some of the highlights of
the past year for you, and what are
you excited about this year?
My highlight from 2015 would be
moving to California from ChicagoI
miss the city, but I do not miss the
weather. For 2016, Id love to travel to
new places Ive never been before.
Who do you plan to travel with and
why?
I like to travel with my boyfriend
because I like sharing experiences with
him. The next places I want to see are
Australia, Paris, and Amsterdam.
Are you the type to wing it while
traveling or do you prefer a more
planned trip?
Im always a go with the flow kind of
girl!
And do you hang on to your phone a
lot or is it a time to disconnect from
the grid?
Id say Im in between! FH M
Lisa Dillon
My new Years resolutions are
to read more and spend less
time on social media
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ADVERTISING FEATURE
DOWN
CY Ortega working out with his fellow

FREEGO #SuperShapeMe contestants
BY
Erwan Heussaff, Chris Tiu, and Freego VP

for Marketing Marty Tio
FIND OUT HOW FREEGO

#SUPERSHAPEME FITNESS
CHALLENGE WINNER CY
ORTEGA MANAGED TO
SHED THE FLUFF
Cutting a ne gure in a pair of faded
black jeans and a crisp shirt and tie, CY
Ortega held back tears as he was named
the mens division winner of FREEGOs
recently concluded #SuperShapeMe 2015
Fitness Challenge at an energy-charged
nale at URBN Bar and Kitchen, Bonifacio
Global City. The 27-year-old nurse lost an
impressive 38 lbs. in two months through
supervised and monitored exercise and
diet regimens. He won a trip for two to
Coron, Palawan and FREEGOs complete
Body Circuit collection.
Ortega claims that his late fathers
health complications were the impetus
for him to start taking his own health
seriously. He had hypertension, heart
and kidney failure, and he was only 65.
I told myself I didnt want that to happen
to me. For a time, he seemed destined
to a similar fate. Ortega suffered all the
classic symptoms of obesity. Even simple
movements made breathing difficult,
he admits. He was also the butt of conurses jokes. They gave me nicknames
depending on the color of scrubs I wore
for the day, he says. I was Piglet when I
wore pink, Jollibee when I was in red, Pooh
when I wore yellow, and Barney when I was
in violet.
Browsing through YouTube one day,
he chanced upon a video that would
change his life. After a successful run
in 2014, FREEGOs #SuperShapeMe
Fitness Challenge was back, this time
CY Ortega is in the best shape

of his life thanks to the Freego
#SuperShapeMe Challenge
WE WERE ONLY ALLOWED

TO EAT LEAN MEAT AND
VEGETABLES, WHICH I HATED
THE MOST. IT LEFT ME WITH NO
CHOICE BUT TO SUCK IT UP.
as a nationwide campaign for both men
and women. This years competition
drew over 1,000 applicants from all over
the archipelago and put them through a
stringent screening process that whittled
them down to 10 men and 10 women.
SHAPING UP
The next 60 days were gruelling for Ortega,
who typically resorted to fad diets and
was not a fan of working out. Basketball
star Chris Tiu came in as his tness coach,
putting him through cardio workouts,
strength-training routines, and CrossFit.
It revealed just how out of shape Ortega
Before
After
was. It was very difficult to tolerate, and

it usually left me dizzy and nauseated, he
admits. But through proper hydration, I was
able to overcome every exercise. Likewise,
Ortegas strict diet designed by nutrition
expert and food blogger Erwan Heussaff
proved a challenge. It was extremely
plain and unsatisfying most of the time.
says Ortega. We were only allowed to eat
lean meat and vegetables, which I hated
the most. It left me with no choice but to
suck it up.
Ortega still intends to take it further: his
goal is to drop 12 more pounds, and he has
aspirations of getting into triathlon. Ive
also become mindful of my diet, he sa.
Ive bid goodbye to processed foods, rice,
and soft drinks, and am trying to discover
the tastes of vegetables and spices.
The 60-day #SuperShapeMe Challenge
is done, but I have the rest of my life to
challenge myself.
starter
Brushes with
death
1st degree:
H ow c lose we re you to
k i c k ing t h e bu c ket ?
Close callsyou
can never really
tell whether youre
lucky or unlucky to
have experienced
them. Either way,
they make you really
feel your mortality
for a moment, and
then after a while of
desperate existential
questioning, you get
on with your life as if
nothing happened.
To get a grip on
near-death
scenarios, we talked
with a registered
nurse and emergency medical technician who rides in an
ambulance almost
every day, Adriel
Kenneth Aragon.
He's seen it all,
from hyperventilating teenagers who
think theyre going
to die because
their air-conditioner
broke down to
people whove been
dragged underneath
cars and lived to
tell the tale. Lets
see how thankful
you guys should
be after you realize
how close you really were to actually
kicking the bucket...
WORDS:
CHISE ALCANTARA
ILLUSTRATIONS:
LOUIS ARENAS
18 FH M DECEMBER 2015
1st degree:
allergy
1st degree:
The electric
current causes
your muscles to
constrict, which
makes it harder
to let go of the
object causing
you pain parang
pag-ibig.
Minor to major
skin irritations
that manifest
through rashes,
redness, and
bumps.
2nd degree:
2nd degree:
electric
shock
Shortness of
breath can also
be an effect of
an allergy since
air passages
tend to swell
because of a
high amount
of histamine in
your body.
2nd degree:
A higher voltage
of electricity,
like one from
telephone lines,
could cause
second to third
degree burns to
your skin.
A minor or major
fracture on the
bone(s) that
were directly hit
by the vehicle.
3rd degree:
3rd degree:
That annoying
itch should be
the least of
your worries
when it comes
to allergic
reactions.
Turning red is
almost always
better than
turning blue.
3rd degree:
"Parang siyang
(your foot)
saging na
nabalatan," says
Nurse Aragon.
"Dumadaloy kasi
yung electric
currents sa loob
ng katawan
mo kaya kapag
dumating sa
dulo puputok
siya."
Bruising on the
part that made
contact with the
vehicle.
Electric
current travels
from the spot
where the
object made
contact with
the charge,
but the energy
goes through
the object
and gets
released at the
farthest end;
which is why
sometimes
even if
your right
hand gets
electrocuted,
your left hand
or foot takes
the brunt of
the damage.
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Air passages
close due
to extreme
inflammation,
which cuts off
oxygen to your
brain.
Aside from
multiple fractures,
the body could
be thrown over
or mowed down
by the car, which
could cause
permanent spine
and head injuries.
www.fhm.com.ph
1st degree:
car crash
1st degree:
heat
stroke
Cramps are
caused by the
body expending
energy and
failing to
replenish the
nutrients it has
lost.
2nd degree:
Apart from
the speed and
size of the
vehicle hitting
you, the way
you distribute
your weight
throughout
your body at
the point of
impact could
greatly affect
how serious
the damage
could get.
Nurse Aragon
explains,
"Kung yung
weight mo
nasa foot
ng leg na
tatamaan,
lalabanan niya
yung force ng
sasakyan kaya
mas madali
siyang mababali."
www.fhm.com.ph
Your body
becomes
exhausted
because its
trying to regulate
your body
temperature. This
also brings about
dizziness and
thirst.
3rd degree:
This is why
it is always
important to
keep water
and snacks
nearby especially when
the harsh
Philippine
weather rears
its ugly head.
"Madalas
hindi enough
yung paginom lang ng
water kapag
sobra ka
nang pawisan.
Kailangan
may electrolytes inumin
mo para mareplenish yung
pinawis mong
minerals.
After an
estimated three
to five minutes
of being cut-off
from oxygen,
the brain could
be affected by
treatable trauma
involving motor
and sensory
skills.
1st degree:
drowning
2nd degree:
food
poisoning
However five
to ten minutes
without oxygen
could cause
irreversible
trauma, which
means it cant be
treated through
therapy.
2nd degree:
Rejection of
poison from
body, which
is caused by
vomiting and
your good ol
LBM.
3rd degree:
If youre not dead

after ten minutes
of no oxygen,
youre probably
going to be a
vegetable when
they revive you.
Collapsing
signals your
body to give up
because of its
failure to keep
itself at a safe
temperature.
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Your body
acknowledges
that there is
foreign matter
inside of it that
you need to let
out (signaled by
stomach aches
and utot).
"Kung less
than three
minutes ka
lang nawalan
ng oxygen,
most likely
wala namang
mangyayari
sa'yong
masama pero
kung more
than that,
baka kulangin
na ng oxygen
yung utak mo
at magkaroon
siya ng damage. Marami
na akong nakitang naging
gulay kahit
ilang minutes
lang silang
nalunod bago
maligtas,"
says Nurse
Aragon.
fhmphilofficial
3rd degree:
Weve all
gone through
this. First
stage would
be doubting
yourself,
second would
almost always
be rejection,
and third is
when you
finally give
up. Yup, food
poisoning can
be a bitch.
Food poisoning,
if left untreated,
could cause
extreme
dehydration and
death.
DECEMBER 2015 FH M 19
starter
WORDS:
MARY ROSE HOGAZA
ILLUSTRATIONS:
AJ BERNARDO
p ro b l em #1
Firework
debris,
firewo rk debris
every where
SOLUTION: While
semi-legally setting off
big explosions might be
the best part about New
Years celebration, no
one could say that about
the cleanup afterwards.
We asked a ten-year
kasambahay named
Jennifer Tamsi for tips
in cleaning the debris.
Ipunin muna lahat ng
kalat sa isang sulok
tapos pag malinis na
lahat ng paligid, ilagay
sa sako. Ibaon dapat sa
lupa, huwag susunugin
kasi delikado, Ms. Tamsi
advices. Well, better start
digging dude.
how to
fix everything
you broke during
the holidays
O n c e t h e drunke n k ar aoke t une s die down and t h e smoke c l e ar s , you ll find
t hings are n t wh at t hey use d to b e . H e res how to g et b a c k o n t r a c k . . .
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fhmphilofficial
www.fhm.com.ph
proble m #2
Cash, depleted
SOLUTION: Now that

the holiday splendor has
settled down, we are pretty
sure you are checking
your bank statement and
credit card bills with wide
eyes. Before thinking of
borrowing money with
interest, check other
options. Look into your
unnecessary stuff that can
be disposed and turned
into cash. You may post it
on buy and sell websites,
says Marilyn Tanglao, a
financial advisor. Check
on other loans or credit
card facilities that offer
lower interest rates and
staggered payment. Look
into personal loans or
Installment plans, balance
transfers, credit to cash,
and others.
p ro b l e m # 3
You feel
bloated
SOLUTION: To remedy this doesnt
mean skipping meals. According
to Nutrition Officer II Jana Culla
of the National Nutrition Council,
Hindi advisable na hindi ka totally
kakain. Better eat small, frequent
meals that are high in fiber para
hindi ka ma-constipate. Also, avoid

eating raw vegetables because it
contributes to the heavy feeling, so
cook them even for a minute lang.
Culla says. A 30- to 45-minute
walk is enough exercise in a day. I
also recommend yoga at home.
p ro b l e m # 4
You werent able to

sleep well
SOLUTION: Make sleep your top
priority for the next few days. It's hard to
do your goals if you're feeling drained.
According to the National Sleep
Foundation, an organization dedicated
to improving health and well-being
through sleep education and advocacy:
adequate sleep guards off a multitude
of other problems including disease
and weight gain (from the carbs during
the numerous Christmas and New Year
handaan). A healthy sleeping routine
includes at least seven hours of sleep
per cycleeight if youre over 50.
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fhmphilofficial
starter
proble m #5
A broken heart
SOLUTION: Dude, youve

got to move on. She
left you. She no longer
feels the same for you.
Shes now happy with
another man. What keeps
you holding on? We
interviewed our friend,
Joelan aka Mr. Sawi to the
Bones, to see if he
has any tips for us; Make
yourself busy. Go out with
your friends, mag-overtime
ka sa work para hindi
masyado maisip yung
sakit na naidulot niya.
Huwag ka muna pumunta
sa mga lugar na maraming
couple, ma-iinggit ka lang.
Umiyak ka kung gusto mo
tapos sa susunod na mga
araw, tatawanan mo na
lang sarili mo, like this,
Oha ha!
proble m #6
You h ave a ha ng ove r

SOLUTION: Ask any seasoned drunk who
nurses virtually zero hangovers and the
response will be: drink water during and
after each tagay session. A very good point
that science backs up because alcohol is a
diuretic (leeches out fluids in the body).
p ro b l e m # 7
You get the runs

SOLUTION: Most of us will experience
diarrhea after eating all the suspicious
leftovers that your mom told you na
pwede pa. If you cant immediately see
a doctor, Nurse Stephanie Hogaza from
Al Mouwasat Hospital advises either of
these options as first aid: the BRAT diet,
or Oresol Therapy. BRAT stands for
Banana, Rice, Apple, and Toast. When
you are suffering from loose bowel
movement, you need to limit your intake
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fhmphilofficial
to food that wont irritate your stomach.

These four are great options because
they are low-fiber food that can help
make your stool firmer, Hogaza says.
Meanwhile, Oresol therapy is needed
to replace the fluids youve lost. All
you need to do is mix one teaspoon of
salt, eight teaspoons of sugar, and one
liter water. Stir the mixture till the sugar
dissolves, Hogaza advises.
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starter
HU
WAW
UGOT
H
IRITS
To r t ang torpe
Yung mga pinapasukan
kong relasyon parang
talong.
Sa simula pa lang, talo
na ako.
JuskoLord, via
Facebook
ILLUSTRATION: MIKKE GALLARDO
Bar room jokes

L a u g h
o u t
Well that socked
l o u d e s t
A young couple decided to get married. As the

big day approached, they grew apprehensive.
Each had a problem they had never before
shared with anyone, not even with each other.
The groom-to-be, overcame his fear and asked
his future father-in-law for advice. Father, he
said, I am deeply concerned about the success
of my marriage. I love your daughter very
much, but you see, I have very smelly feet, and
I'm afraid that my future wife will be put off
by them. No problem, said his father-in-law,
all you have to do is wash your feet as often as
possible, and always wear socks, even to bed.
Well, to him this seemed a workable solution.
The bride-to-be, overcoming her fear, decided to
take her problem up with her future mother-inlaw. Mom, she said, When I wake up in the
morning my breath is truly awful. Honey,
her mother consoled, everyone has bad breath
in the morning. No, you dont understand.
My morning breath is so bad, Im afraid that
my new husband will not want to sleep in the
same room with me. Her mother said simply,
Try this; in the morning, get straight out
of bed, and head for the bathroom and brush
your teeth. The key is, not to say a word until
youve brushed your teeth. Not a word, her
mother affirmed. Well, she thought it was
certainly worth a try. The loving couple was
finally married in a beautiful ceremony. Not
forgetting the advice each had received, he with
his perpetual socks and she with her morning
www.fhm.com.ph
silence, they managed quite well. That is, until

about six months later. Shortly before dawn,
the husband wakes with a start to find that
one of his socks had come off. Fearful of the
consequences, he frantically searches the bed.
This, of course, woke his wife and without
thinking, she immediately asks, What on earth
are you doing? Oh, no! he gasped in shock,
Youve swallowed my sock!
Bentables, via Facebook
Puny puns
There was a prison

break and I saw a
midget climb up the
fence. As he jumped
down he sneered at me
and I thought, well thats
a little condescending.
Chikababes, via
Facebook
Brainwashed
I used to think the brain

was the most important
organ. Then I thought,
Look whats telling
me that.
BulletForMyBible,
via Facebook
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twitter.com/fhmphil
Not included
I totally understand how

batteries feel because
Im rarely ever included
in things either.
Gregory, via
Facebook
B u m o to nang
tama
Para kang pulitiko.
Ang dami nang niloko,
ang dami pa ring may
gusto.
PleaseLang, via
Facebook
B u l a g- bulagan
Kung magkaroon man
ako ng third eye, ilalagay
ko ito sa puso ko.
Para hindi na ako
mabulag sa pag-ibig.
OhYeah, via
Facebook
N A IA
Laglag-bala?
Tanim-bala?
Dahil sayo, mas takot pa
rin ako sa alaala.
#HugotLalaki, via
Facebook
DIRTIEST JOKE
SHE
K N OWS
The twins
My friend at the singles

club was blithely chatting
away, oblivious to the
fact that her nametag
had slipped down over
one of her breasts. I was
wondering if I should ask
her what she named the
other one.
Ralph, via Facebook
fhmphilofficial
San nagtatago ang

malilibog na mga multo?
Eh di sa spuke (spooky).
Donna, 24, Preschool
teacher
Put your phone

down and give
your thumbs a
rest. Here are
in-the-moment
landian hacks to
make you pogi ,
presently...
How to
flirt in
real life
w or ds : WAY N E J OS E P H TU LI O
Flirting in the age of

smartphones has reduced
most men to exchanging
LOLs and wink emojis with
girls they meet on Tinder.
Even if youve met her say,
at an office party, youre
likely to start or continue
the flirting process in
the comforts of Viber
chatbut only after youve
stalked her Facebook
profile. But what if things
were offline? Youve just
met a hot woman and
shes right there in front of
you, would you know the
first thing to say? We do
2
Never start a coNversatioN with a
pick-up liNe or weird questioN
It screams manyak, pre. Men often forget that women are
intuitive, says Zo Aguila, public relations consultant. If you
seem sleazy or youre suddenly in her face from out of nowhere,
shell have her guard up. If shes with her barkadathe walls will
be even higher.
Your move: Slide into her comfort zone by being friendly.
Youre likely in the same place because of a common person or
a common reasonso start there, Aguila says. Simply say hello,
ask about that common thing, and introduce yourself.
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R es is t t h e urg e t o
t alk yo u rs e l f u p
Hey, youre nervous right?
Your move: Find
common ground. Gino
Quillamor, co-host of
RX 93.1s The Morning
Rush suggests you ask
what school she went to
instead. You can play
up people you know
who went to her school
and ask if she knows
them. Then pick up the
conversation from there.
www.fhm.com.ph
l o u n G e D At e h A C K s
Forget about
impressiNg her
Youre finally talking! Thats a
good thingbut you could hit a
wall. To keep things going, forget
about trying to impress her.
Your move: Be curious. A
gorgeous woman attracts
competition, possibly some
gawking. But you can show her
that youre different from the
others by engaging her in real
conversation: If a guy is curious
enough to know about my day,
what Im thinking, and my say on
certain topics, it gives me a hint
that hes interested, says Aguila.
Another upside:
youre making
her curious
about you, too.
flirt with
eVery inCh of
your BoDy
4
Be suBtle when you
fish for info
When a girl seems engaged in everything youre saying,
your mind can go haywire wanting to know if shes
single. But asking her outright can be a bit much,
especially if youve just met.
Your move: Mention the word boyfriend in a question.
Its an indirect way of asking her if shes single. Ask
Is your boyfriend picking you up tonight? suggests
Aguila. If she says that shes unattached, then thats
your cue to keep the flirting going. Dont think she
wont know youre fishing for information, though. But
doing it subtly invites less turnoffs.
Subtle moves like

these should cue her
in that youre not for
All in A gAze
David Cohen, author

of Body Language:
Overcome Common
Problems, suggests you try
this: Hold her gaze for a
second (too long and shell
think youre a creep), then
look away. Do it again and
smile, if she smiles back,
then you can introduce
yourself.
look more open
doNt liNger
When a gorgeous woman
happens to be engaged
in a conversation with
you, its easy to want to
stay right beside her.
But what that hints to
her is that youre clingy.
Not cool, man.
Your move:
Disengage whenever
you can. Even if youve
hit it off right away
and youre in a group
setting, its best to
www.fhm.com.ph
pique her curiosity. Mingle with

others, say something smart
in a group conversation, and
make it appear picking her
up is the last thing on your
mind. You dont have to
be the life of the party,
but a girl can get curious
if you look like youre
genuinely having fun
and you engage other
people around you, says
Aguila.
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First up, dont slouch and

stand tall. Nervous as you
are, always appear like
youre open to talk. Dont
cross your arms when
youre talking, and lean
forward if its crowded and
noisy, advises Aguila.
Touch her like

A genTlemAn
Subtle touching can

easily hint youre into her.
But make sure to keep
it clean. A light touch on
the shoulder and on her
forearm is cool. If she
reciprocates, shes into
you, too.
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fhmphilofficial
6
B e slig h t l y va g u e
wh en c lo s i n g a d a t e
Youre both single and she
seems fun to talk with
now comes the tough
part: asking her out. Do
it wrong and uuwi kang
sawi.
Your move: Make
your invite seem like a
non-date. Movies are a
common excuse to hang
out. If you find shes into
a certain type of flick,
then dont directly ask
them out on a date, just
say it in passing, advises
Quillamor. Say one of
these days, we should go
out and watch this. It hints
that youre interested, but
harmless enough to get
her thinking. The less
interested you appear,
the more mysterious you
seem. Quillamor adds.
LOUNGE
S
This year of the

fire monkey,
we deep-six the
astrology and
look to earthlier
habits of our
neighboring
species...
Diddling
according to
animals
w o r d s : K H Y N E PA LU MA R
p h o to g r a p h y : H E I D I AQU E N D E
L E G E N D
f
flirting
s
sex
p r o p s a nd st yl i ng:
G E N I E R A N A DA -BA B I STA
p
pairing
R es p ec t a nd ke e p
t ab o f u rg e s
D O G LI FE,
M AT I N G
LIFE
As seen in: dogs

Breeders call it play mountingpuppies as
early as five months jump fellow puppies
from behind doggy style without malisya for
purposes of play and socialization. But also,
because animal biologists believe its instinctive
dry run for adult-style doggie. Puppies unable
to practice play mounting, according to The
Whole Dog Journal, become problematic
with dominance, control, and
emotional reactivity (how they
react involuntarily to things outside
themselves).
s
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fhmphilofficial
Birth to five
months
Patay malisya,
non-sexual
genital licking.
Five months
to 12
months
Wet and dry
humping,
genital licking,
periods of selfdiscovery.
1 year to 7
years
Active mating
period, twice
a year oestrus
period (in heat)
in females,
stuck-together
sex when male
dog penises
swell inside the
female.
7 years up
Female species
libido tapers off,
mating in males
dependent on
stability of hind
legs, occasional
stuck-genitals
sex.
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As seen in: monkeys

The reason monkeys have yet to
outnumber us Planet of the Apes-style
besides humans laying waste to over
200,000 primates in animal testing labs
every yearis because when food (fruits,
nuts, insects) is in short supply and housing
(trees) doesnt exist, female
primates vaginas literally
dry up. Even while in heat,
female monkeys will stop
going into oestrus until
her basic ecological
needs are met.
E x t en d o r a l , t o
e x t en d pe n i l e p l a y
As seen in: fruit bats
Biologists at the Guangdong Entomological
Institute in Guangzhou conducted a
research on Chinese fruit bats by hitching
cameras in bat habitats, hoping to learn
more about them. What they gleaned: the
longer females stuck their tongues out at
the males genitals, the longer time the
couples spent copulating, adding roughly
six seconds of diddle for each second of
fellatio.
P rovide adequ ate

fo o d an d sh elter
R E A L- W O R L D
S EXUAL
SADISM
Besides engaging
competing monkey rivals
in fist and elbow fights,
male primate species the
likes of baboons will kill off
one or massacre
a number of
younger,
mating age
primates to
get a female
monkey or
the entire
female
population to
mate with him.
p
DOWNSIDE
UP, HAREM
STYLE
The spectral bat is one of
few bat species that mates
with just one partner. But in
largely 1,000 species, mating
is done with multiple
partners: one after the
other, or with multiple
bats at once, while
hanging upside
down.
S low an d
stead y
fe r t i l i z es
eggs
If you
have to
P.D.A.,
go all
the way
As seen in: snails

Hermaphrodite sexing snails
communicate mating intentions
by shooting darts from an internal
muscle sac, poking the intended
partner. The receiving snail sends
out another dart to confirm it is
ready for mating. Once successful,
they slink together between
an average of two- to 12-hour
stretch. After half a day, up to 100
eggs at a time are fertilizedinside
both snails.
As seen in: cats

Domestic male and female
felines will let out caterwauls
or unusually ugly and grating
meow sounds when mating.
Larger cats/tigers will howl
at each other in the premounting/flirting stage.
Hissing and prissy sounds are
audible too, making it sound
like two felines are fighting
when theyre actually mating.
KI N K I N
TO R S I O N
Gastropods
mollusks, or
most snail and
slug species
can rotate their
internal organs
180 in the main
cavities of their
bodies, so much
so that a snail
can touch its
anus (located on
the hump inside
its shell) with its
mouth.
P ractice self
love
As seen in: fish
Some fish species are
born with non-binary
genitals, packing either:
female organs, male
organs, or a single
genital that can change
from male to female
in the course of its
lifetime (see: a type of
sea bass, serranidae).
There are also unisex
fish that reproduce by
sexingthemselves.
s
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CARING DISPLAYS
Smelling, purring, rubbing
against each other,
neck-biting, licking, and
grooming are all outward
physical evidence of
feline approval.
fhmphilofficial
MOUTH
TO MOUTH
INCUBATION
Catfish secure their
young post-mating by
dividing fertilized eggs
in different water
nests, so they get
enough oxygen.
about to come. I naughtily

bit my lip and firmly grabbed
his cock and gave him some
finishing strokes. He covered
his mouth with his hand to
stop himself from letting out
a moan. I could feel his pubic
hairs sticking together because
of his jizz. I gathered as much
of his semen from his briefs as
best as I could so he wouldnt
be too awkward walking
around. I excused myself
and washed my hands in the
bathroom.
Kat, via Facebook
,
LADIES
CONFESSIONS
Hiding crotches in plain sight
Ill take care of you
I have never actually had sex

with my boyfriend, but weve
done almost everything except
actual penetration. The first
time I gave him something
was during a movie night
out with friends. We werent
together then but we had an
inkling that we liked each
otherwell, at least wanted
to do some stuff together. We
were sitting on the couch while
our other friends were on the
floor. I started massaging his
28 Fh M JANUARY 2016
I have always been a naughty

girl. I started reading romance
novels early. I would always
feel something down there
whenever I read them, and I
would always keep my legs
together, while imagining
someone massaging my
breasts. I stumbled upon
this video of a guy licking
a womans breasts. I felt my
panties dampen. I easily get
wet even when Im not aroused,
but this time it was flowing out
of control. I touched the wet
line between my pussys plump
lips. I went to the bathroom
to shower, but when I started
to wash down there, I felt a
sudden urge to keep rubbing
it. The pleasure spread all
across my body, I kept rubbing,
my juices kept on flowing. I
moaned as I rubbed harder and
faster until I felt, what seemed
like an explosion inside of me.
I was dazed by the extreme
satisfaction I felt, I clung to
the faucet handle near me, to
keep my balance. I shyly took
a whiff of the finger I had just
used to make myself orgasm
for the very first time, and it
had that distinct smell. Since I
discovered how to masturbate,
I know I cant and wont stop
doing it.
Specter Donna, via Bullboard
willing to learn
thigh, he was startled at first,

but I signaled him to stay
calm. He understood and I
started massaging his bulging
member inside his pants. I slid
my hand inside his underwear
and stroked him. He started
reaching for my thigh but I
led his hand away, I wanted
to be in control. He started
moving closer to me, panting
softly. I quickened my pace,
and his breathing got heavier.
He looked at me and smiled
nervously, I could feel he was
facebook.com/FHM.ph
ALwAyS hErE
tO LIStEN,
LADIES!
Keep sending
your escapades to
fhmladiesconfessions
@gmail.com or
Facebook.com/fhm.ph
twitter.com/fhmphil
fhmphilofficial
I was the bunso of my college

block and everybody treated
me like a kid, except for this
one guy who I felt was extra
nice to me. He asked me if I
ever had a boyfriend, and I
said Ive never had one. He said
he wanted to be my boyfriend.
I accepted because I was really
kilig at that time. I gave him
my first kiss, and we got to
second base a few months
into our relationship. We kept
things a secret since I come
from a really strict Chinese
family, and I didnt want my
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Self discovery
he started reaching
for my thigh but I
led his hand away,
I wanted to be in
control.
family and friends to know I

had a boyfriend.
I had been waiting for him at
the library so he could drop me
off at my house one evening.
We got into his car, we kissed
and I slid him a bit of tongue.
I laughed and said, Uy,
may gusto ka bang gawin?
I teased, Katulad ng ano?
and kissed him again more
passionately; I felt his dick get
hard underneath his shorts. He
asked, Gusto mo sa apartment
ko na lang kita ihatid? I got
nervous and said, I dont
know; hindi pa yata ako
ready. Okay, I understand,
he said while starting up the
engine. I felt as if he was really
disappointed, so I wanted to
at least do something for him.
While he was driving, I put
my hand on his thigh, and
started going for his groin. I
held onto it, and he moaned.
I unzipped his shorts and
saw his underwear bulge just
pop out. I massaged it a bit
more, I slid out his dick from
his brief. It sprung up and I
giggled. My lips got closer to
his cock. He was surprised and
asked me, Marunong ka pala
nyan? I answered, Syempre
naman! Even though I had
no idea what I was doing. I
www.fhm.com.ph
started licking his dick, it

tasted weird but I liked the fact
it was really hard, it felt like
it really wanted to get sucked,
so I did it. I sucked a dick for
the very first time, I heard
my boyfriend groan as he
said, Walang ngipin, please.
I apologized and was really
embarrassed, He answered
assuringly, Dahan-dahan
lang. I used my tongue and
mouth, and he moaned as if
I was doing a good job. After
a while, I really got into the
rhythm of it, and he seemed
to be enjoying it a lot more.
He finally said, Mag-cu-cum
na ako. I kept going, this
time, a bit faster; I felt the car
jolt a bit. He tensed and came
inside my mouth. Even though
I was readying myself for it,
I gagged a bit and started
coughing. I looked up at him,
and I promise, I have never
seen a bigger smile on his
stupid, handsome face.
Fei fei, via Facebook
MEANwhILE,
IN LADy
PArtS I.Q.
Pelvic floor
muscle
re l a xa t i o n
Face sitting
exposes your
womans labia
minora (vag inner
lips) onto your
tongue or facial
lips. This allows
your womans
pelvic floor
muscles (major
muscles of the
crotch) to sag and
relax while you
administer oral.
An appetizer
My hubby and I finally got

a night out alone away from
the kids so we decided to eat
at an expensive restaurant.
The waiter seated us and we
took a look at the menu. The
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twitter.com/fhmphil
fhmphilofficial
place was pretty pricey so we

decided to skip the appetizers
and go straight to the main
course. The waiting was
longer than we expected and
we ran out of things to talk
about. Bored, I played footsie
with him. I started getting
a bit naughtier and placing
my feet higher and closer to
his groin. He was starting to
dirty talk me into giving him
one of my signature foot jobs,
I was hesitant at first but I
eventually gave in. I started
stroking his penis with my
feet from underneath the table.
It was a lot more difficult
than I had expected, and my
legs were getting a bit tired,
but he begged me to keep
going since he was close to
orgasming. I kept at it but the
waiter suddenly arrived with
our food. We tried to stay as
composed as we could possibly
get, but I felt like he was
suspecting something. Good
thing he didnt check what
was going under our table.
My husband jokingly said,
Sayang. Ambilis ng pagkain
dito. I replied, Okay lang,
hun. May dessert pa naman.
WatchaGonnaDo, via
Facebook
JANUARY 2016 Fh M 29
ACCESS
Y O U R
M O N T H LY
V I P
J A N U A R Y
2 0 1 6
P A S S
01
bO OK S
Turning
over a
new leaf
JOTTIng dOwn yOur
annual reSOluTIOnS?
hereS a lIST Of paperbaCKS
TO reMInd yOu hOw nOT TO
bOTCh ThOSe gOalS
2 B e le s s
pa k i a l a m e r o
Project 17, by Eliza
Victoria
A babysitter finds out
"Curiosity killed the cat"
the hard way with the
28-year-old schiz-affective
brother of her employer.
Sometimes, the less you
know, the less trouble.
3 lend a helping hand
Rogue Lawyer, by
John Grisham
He aint Breaking Bad's
Saul, but street lawyer

Sebastian Rudd's
clients include a sinister
juvenile, a crime lord,
and an unwitting SWAT
assaulter. Why? Because
he believes everyone
deserves a fair trial.
4 str e s s l e s s
The Bubble Bible, by
Michael V.
Bitoy has pretty much
played all of us in his
countless Bubble Gang
sketches: Junie Lee, Mr.
Assimo, Cecilio Sasuman...
He gathers them once
more in this side-splitting
compendium.
5 e at h e a lthy
Salt Sugar Fat: How
the Food Giants
Hooked Us, by
Michael Moss
The Pulitzer Prize-winning
investigative reporter
delves into why we just
can stop munching on
processed food.
6 r a m B le le s s
a n d p o st m o r e
i n s i g ht F u l stu F F
The Tweetable Pope,
by Michael J. O
Loughlin
O Loughlin breaks down
each of the affable
Pontiffs 140 characters
in a scholarly and spiritual
context.
facebook.com/FHM.ph
twitter.com/fhmphil
WORDS : PAULO AGUILERA
1 F i g u r e o u t yo u r
l i F es p u r p o s e
Avenue of Mysteries,
by John Irving
Set in the Philippines, it
tells the story of Juan
Diego, a Mexican who is
in the country for some
soul-searching. If the
protagonist's sister Lupe
has the ability to read
minds, Diego himself has
to rely on his thoughts to
unravel his future.
fhmphilofficial
www.fhm.com.ph
02
C OM ICS
Put it on paper
7 spend more time

w ith m o m a n d p o p s
For One More Day, by
Mitch Albom
How would you go about
if you were given a chance
to spend another 24 hours
with a deceased loved
one? Chick Benettos life
was crashing down when
he's taken back in time
and reintroduced to the
value of his existence.
8 s h e d yo u r B a By Fat
Born to Run: A
Hidden Tribe,
Superathletes, and
the Greatest Race
the World Has Never
Seen, by Christopher
McDougall
The reclusive Tarehumara
tribe of Mexico are born
runners. With the author
setting off to learn their
ways, he finds his inner
athlete and discovers the
true essence of running.
www.fhm.com.ph
9 l ay o F F th e
c i g a r et te s
Thank you for
Smoking, by
Christopher Buckley
This political satire
centers on a lobbyist
who champions tobacco
and its benefits. Brutally
hilarious, the novel also
puts a spotlight on
several other industries
supposedly damned by the
media: alcohol and guns.
10 s ta rt s a v i n g u p
Mount Pleasant, by
Don Gillmor
Protagonist Harry Salter
thought his inheritance
would salvage him from a
ballooning debt. But after
being left with a measly
$4,200, he probes into the
baffling loss of his fathers
money and unravels a
mess far more personal
than financial.
facebook.com/FHM.ph
Ang
badass na
buhay ni
lam-ang by
Carlorozy
Clemente
What
were you
thinking
when you
came up
with your
comics?
Gusto ko
kasing
i-remake
yung comics
na ginawa
ko nung bata
ako tungkol
sa history
lesson kay
Lam-Ang,
pero with a
twist.
If you were
teleported
into your
comics,
would you
be happy or
sad?
Masaya dahil
pinaghalo
ko yung
mundo nina
Lam-Ang at
yung modern
world. Ang
dami kasing
possibilities!
twitter.com/fhmphil
Libog by
Rawrr
Enrique
If you had
the chance
to copy the
style and
talent of
any comic
creator,
who would
it be?
Frank Miller.
Akala ng iba
madali yung
ginagawa
niya dahil
black and
white, pero
ang hirap
paglaruan ng
contrast at
lighting.
What are
your hopes
for your
comics?
Gusto ko
talagang mamainstream
pero yung
mga tema
ko, hindi
naman pang
mainstream.
Gusto kong
malaman
ng tao na
merong
comics na
ganito.
fhmphilofficial
Zombinoy
by
pelikomiks
studios
Who
inspired the
characters
in your
comics?
Yung isang
character
naming
hippie,
inspired by
my uncle.
Medyo drifter
din kasi siya.
Yung ibang
characters
based din sa
pinaghalong
ugali ng mga
friends namin.
May galit
ba kayo
at nilagay
ninyo sila
sa may
zombie?
Hindi naman.
Actually,
tribute pa nga
yun sa kanila
dahil pati
mannerisms
at sayings
nila sinasama
namin, at
natutuwa
naman
sila kapag
nababasa nila
yun, ha ha!
Network
wars by
Angelo de
Los Trinos
aka AD3
What
ispired
your story?
Actually,
naglalaro
kami ng
Team
Fortress 2
tapos may
nag-joke
lang, kung
sakaling yung
magkalabang
red at blue
team, naging
ABS-CBN
at GMA na
lang.
What are
your hopes
and dreams
for your
work?
Hindi lang
para sa amin
pero para na
rin sa grupo
kong The
Desk, sana
sumikat pa
kami para
makaipon at
makagawa
pa kami
ng bagong
comics.
WORDS : CHISE ALCANTARA
The up-and-COMIng IndIe COMIC

CreaTOrS aT KOMIKOn 2015 TalK Of
begInnIngS, wIShful ThInKIng, and whaT
MaKeS TheIr IMagInaTIOnS run wIld
AC C ESS
03
Dogs more famous than you

*aNd ONE LION
SUPERHERO DOGS
TE LEVI S ION
The Will Smith show

S LY H O U N D S
S I L LY M U T T S
STarS ThIS mONTh

IN CONCuSSION, aS
a brILLIaNT fOrENSIC
NEurOpaThOLOgIST.
hErE, a LIST Of wOrkS
ThaT aLrEady wON hIm
a gOLdEN TrOphy IN
Our bOOk...
The Peanuts
Movie out
in theatres
January 8
P L AYF U L P E T S
4
1
1 Hitch as Alex
Hitchens
Should be on any
mans list of movies
on self-improvement
and avoiding allergic
reactions.
Winning line: Because
thats what people do.
They leap and hope to
God they can fly. Because
otherwise, we just drop
like a rock... wondering the
whole way down, "Why in
the hell did I jump?"
2 Pursuit of
Happyness as
Chris Gardner
Highly aspirational and

inspirational. #Feels
Winning line: Dont
ever let somebody
tell you you cant do
somethingYou got a
dream, you gotta protect
it. If you want something,
go get it. Period.
3 I am Legend as
Robert Neville
Made living alone

bearable (thanks to his
dog, Sam). So when his
pooch died, your mantears fell on cue.
Winning line: [quoting
Bob Marley] The people
who are trying to make
the world worse are not
taking a day off. How can
I? Light up the darkness.
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twitter.com/fhmphil
4 Seven Pounds as
Ben Thomas
Heavy-on-the-chest
drama where Wills
character accidentally
kills seven innocent
people in a car mishap.
He then plays the
empathy card by donating
his organs to the victims.
Winning line: In seven
days, God created the
world. And in seven
seconds, I shattered mine.
fhmphilofficial
5 Ali as
Muhammad Ali
Took on Alis wit, swagger,

and athletic genius,
depicting the boxing
great with justice.
Winning line: Want
me to go somewhere
and fight for you? You
won't even stand up for
me right here in America,
for my rights and my
religious beliefs. You
won't even stand up for
my right here at home.
www.fhm.com.ph
WORDS : ABBY MENDOZA AND PONG CASTILLO
04
M US IC
LARP!*
HangIng oUt wItH gaMe fanS

and roCk band CHeatS
INTERVIEW: ASH MAHINAY
If youre one of the Lanewaygoing types, then a bright spot

in the Singaporean music fests
lineup is the presence of local
indie rock band Cheats. Known for
their energetic stage presence
which youd expect from an eightpiece ensemble spearheaded by
two rowdy frontwomenwe think
theyre the perfect export to get
everyone hyped. But if you cant
make it out there, theyre here to
remind you that we dont need to
go far for quality sounds.
We heard that Cheats came
from video game loving, so
whats everyone playing?
Saab Magalona: Dota 2 and Life
is Strange.
ernest aguila: DOTA!
Jim bacarro: NBA 2K16
because if this music thing doesnt
pan out, the NBA is still an option.
Manny tanglao: MGSV: The
Phantom Pain and 2K too.
Candy gamos: Plague Inc., ha ha!
Mau torralba: Skyrim again, just
because its the best game my PC
can afford to run right now due to
it being old.
Jason Caballa: Im the only band
member who doesnt play video
games. I like toys, though
Does your manager have to
wrangle you guys away from
gaming to work on the band?
Saab: Thankfully, no.
Jim: Gaming, no. Other things, yes.
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Jason: No. Jim does a good job of

doing that already, ha ha!
Mau: We love playing music
together as well, so the transition
from gamer-mode to band mode
is not hard.
Theres also eight of you.
What does that bring to the
table?
Saab: Good: its always a riot.
Bad: its always a riot!
Jim: We keep making new songs,
but its hard to get everyone
together to finish said songs.
Jason: I love the wall of sound
that we create onstage. Also, if
one of the guitar players breaks
a string, another can easily
compensate. The bad? Maybe
were a little harder to schedule
for shows or practice sessions
because were twice as many as a
typical band.
ernest: It feels like were one big
family.
So youre heading to
Laneway. Thoughts about
gigging abroad?
Jason: Were excited, definitely,
but its not our first show abroad.
We played a club show in
Singapore last October 30.
Saab: Its going to be totally
different with a bigger stage
and crowd.
Candy: Its our first big show
abroad. I can't wait to see how its
going to pan out!
Manny: Its slowly sinking in how
much of a big deal this is for me
facebook.com/FHM.ph
*Live-Action Role Playing but in this case, Rock Playing
ACCES S
Clockwise from top:

Ernest Aguila,
Mau Torralba, Saab
Magalona, Candy Gamos,
Enzo Hermosa, Jason
Caballa, Manny Tanglao,
and Jim Bacarro
and the band.

Fans love your live
performances, what do you
think a good live set has that
hooks people?
Saab: I think they like seeing us
have fun on stage.
Jim: When you know the band
loves what theyre doing, you can
forgive the technical mistakes and
it's pure rock and roll.
Jason: Great energy and its
a give-and-take relationship
between performer and audience.
Candy: I think it's all because of
Enzo, ha ha!
Any nerves about performing
for a foreign crowd?
Jim: Yes, because I still get
nervous before any show. And
thats a good thing, right?
Manny: I still get nervous playing
for the local crowds!
Jason: Syempre, meron. But we'll
make sure to have fun, first and
foremost. If were feeling any
pressure, its probably to give a
good show to be able to set a
good precedent so that Laneway
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fhmphilofficial
will get at least one Pinoy act

every year.
More and more music fans
are heading out of the country
to watch festivals, what do
you think this means for the
local scene?
Saab: I think its a bit sad that
we needed to be included in an
international music festival for
some people to even notice we
existed. Theyre like, see you at
Laneway! and were like, you can
watch us here, you know?
Candy: I think its alrightas long
as these music fans go to the
local gigs as well.
Jim: I think this is just a result of
the explosion of music streaming
sites. Its pretty cool in a way but
hopefully they realize that their
next favorite band is just playing
along Katipunan or Guijo street.
Jason: We have enough music
festivals here. Local festivals like
Wanderland and Bazooka Rocks
seem to be well attended.
ernest: Were at your local bars.
Itll be cheaper to find us there!
AC C ESS
06
GAM E S
Wishing for
release(s)
JAN UARY
M AY
APRIL
JUNE
No Mans Sky
This procedurallygenerated space
explorer promises
unlimited gameplay
for the summer.
Uncharted 4:
A Thief's End
The best
looking mud
in an actionadventure game
ever!
MARCH
Star Fox Zero

Fill the lack of
spaceflight games
by going back to the
original flying fox.
Quantum Break
Max Paynes
developers go from
bullet time to full
time control.
MARCH
XCOM 2
This alien-fighting
strategy game can
totally be your date
on Valentines.
Hyrule Warriors
Zelda mashed
up with Dynasty
Warriors? Sounds
like a romp!
APRIL
Mirror's Edge
Catalyst
Parkour around
in one of the best
looking games of
2016, guaranteed.
Als o
com i ng
FE B R UARY
AU G U ST
Tom Clancys
The Division
MMO style squad
shooting in a NYC
thats been wiped
out by biological
terror.
DECEMBER
Deus Ex: Mankind

Divided
The return of Adam
Jensen, 10% man
90% machine super
agent.
Mass Effect
Andromeda
The beginning of a
new trilogy and the
ultimate Christmas
present for all.
PO KE M O N G O
TH E LAST
GUARDIAN
O v E R w ATC H
AT TA C K O N
TI TA N
H O R IZO N ZE R O
DAwN
PERSONA 5
F I N A L FA N TA SY
Xv
facebook.com/FHM.ph
twitter.com/fhmphil
DISHONORED 2
fhmphilofficial
G E A R S O F wA R 4
www.fhm.com.ph
WORDS : ASH MAHINAY
MArk off your GAMinG

cAlEndArS, thE firSt hAlf
of thE yEAr proMiSES
Much GAMinG GoodnESS,
but thE rESt of thE yEAr
in proMiSEd titlES lookS
crAzy AS wEll
winning
BL ACK TU RTL E NE CK SW IMS UI T BY MAR TI N B AUTI ST A
streak
PHOTOG RA PH Y
M A R K N ICDAO
sTYl inG
A j A LBERTO
sTYl i nG As s O C iA TE
j US T I N E DIAMAL O N
MAKEU P
C R I S T I N E DUq UE
HA iR
j O h N vA L L E f O R L O REAL
p R O f E SSIO N N EL
OUR LOvE AffAIR WITh MULTI-AWARD WINNINg ACTRESS

AND SExIEST IN ThE LAND WINNER jENNYLYN MERCADO
REAChES A TANTALIzINg CLIMAx IN hER fOURTh COvER AppEARANCE.
gENTLEMEN, WE ThINK YOULL AgREE WhEN WE SAY,
ThIS DESERvES A STANDINg OvATION
his marks the 8th anniversary of

Jennylyn Mercados FHM cover debut
in January 2008. Looking back, a
lot has happened to Jen since she
first posed for us. She gave birth
to a bouncing baby boy, starred in
B L A C K C UT O UT S W I M S UI T B Y DE N N IS CEL ESTIAL
numerous television shows, and

landed several endorsement deals.
She busted out critically acclaimed
indie flicks while at the same time
conquering the box-office. On her
spare time, she even managed to
compete in triathlons.
Among all her triumphs and
accolades, however, it was her Best
Actress win at the 40th Metro Manila
Film Festival that got her a premiere
spot on the pop culture radar. The
movie: English Only, Please, a
lighthearted romantic comedy about
a language tutor who falls head over
heels in love with her non-Tagalogspeaking balikbayan student. Sounds
pretty basic? Well, it is and it isnt. Yes,
its a conventional rom-com aimed to
please a predominantly female movie
audience. Yet it was an unexpected
vehicle for Jennylyn to showcase
her natural talent for inducing
laughter that rode on the pulse of the
zeitgeista generation all too obsessed
with unabashed displays of emotion
expressed through #feels and #hugot.
And since were on the subject,
FHM was lucky enough to have its
own public display of emotion when,

last year, the magazine finally crowned
Jennylyn Mercado Sexiest in the
Land for 2015. So not only was she
considered one of the most talented
actresses of her generation, but she
was exalted as the countrys finest
female specimen. Indubitable sex
appeal and award-winning thespian
chops: a career combo for success.
And here she is yet again,
returning the favor tenfold. It may
have taken a little over seven years for
her to claim the top spot, but as you
can see, it was well worth the wait.
First off, congratulations for being
the Sexiest Woman in the Land for
2015! How did it feel?
Thank you! Siyempre nagulat ako.
Every year, Im always either number
3 or number 5somewhere in that
range. So I didnt really expect to win
because hindi rin naman talaga namin
kina-career yung sa voting. Im not
sure kung kina-career ng mga fans
and the readers.
Well, based on the results, they did.
Jennylyn
When I found out the results, I was

on my way to New York for a shoot.
Naka-T-shirt lang ako kasi I needed
to wear something comfortable for
the long flight. Sabi ng manager ko
that I had to do an interview before
boardingI thought the interview
was going to be about my shoot so
I agreed. All of a sudden, dumating
yung media and they asked how I
would feel if I won the number one
spot on FHMs 100 Sexiest list. Sabi
ko, Okay lang. Eh di, thank you!
Tapos ako na nga pala and then
naglabasan yung staff ng FHM to
congratulate me! Ano ba kayo? Sana
nakapaghanda man lang ako! Sana
nagsuot ako ng dress man lang di ba?
Wala ako sa ayos! Ha ha!
Were glad that we were able to
surprise you and catch you off
guard. Does being named Sexiest in
the Land put pressure on you to keep
your body in check?
Oo naman. Kung number one ka,
hindi ka pwedeng tumaba! Ha ha!
Kailangan fit ka, alagaan mo dapat
yung sarili mo. I put in double the
effort to take care of myself.
What was it like performing at the

100 Sexiest Victory Party? How did
it feel to be onstage with hundreds
of adoring fans screaming your
name?
They requested that I sing, that I do a
song number, so I did. Mas kinabahan
ako dun sa paglakad!
Why?
Im not very confident walking in high
heels. Sanay ako wearing flats. Pag
naka-heels na ako, ibang usapan na
yan! Im always afraid that Im going
to fall. Nasa isip ko palagi, Shit,
madadapa ba ako? or Dahan-dahan
lang Iba yung nerbyos!
Well, the nerves didnt show at all
during the party. And your body, as
always, was pretty tight! Can you
tell us more about how you stay in
shape and keep yourself sexy?
I really dont do diets so I need to work
out more than usual. Mahilig ako sa
sweets and Im the type of girl who
eats hindi yung hanggang busog
lang, kailangan punung-puno yung
feeling. I went into extreme sports
because bagay siya sa body type ko.
Its effective because I lose weight with
minimal effort. I just need to finish

training and the race tapos petite na
ako! Ha ha!
Are triathlons as mental as they are
physical?
Yes. Its 90 percent mental. Ive joined a
lot of races where it felt like it wouldnt
end my brain was already telling me:
Youre tired. Stop. Tapos titigil ako
at iiyak kasi gusto ko nang tapusin
before my cutoff time. When you think
youre tired, magiging pagod talaga
ang buong katawan mo at aayaw na
siya. When you tell yourself that you
can do it, you can really finish. Tapos
parang kaya pa ng isang round ulit!
Ganun yung feeling! Thats how I
proved to myself that its mental more
than physical.
How did your life change when you
won the Best Actress award for
English Only, Please at the 40th
Metro Manila Film Festival?
Wala naman! Things are still the same.
Theres just more pressure because
everyone expects na perfect ako umarte
lagi. Ay hindi eh! Sorry! Forever pa rin
akong nag-aaral when it comes to my
craft.
R ED CUT OUT SW IMS UI T BY D EN NI S CE L EST IA L
Jennylyn
I think men
should watch
rom-com films
for a change.
When you
think about
it, they kind
of mirror how
relationships are
in the real world
RE D O NE S hO ULD ER SW IM SUI T B Y DA RY L MA AT
Jennylyn
RE D S UI T, A NN E KLE I N
Jennylyn
TA Ng gA SI DE BOO B S WI MS UIT BY jO T L OS A
Jennylyn
Jennylyn
What was running through your

head when they announced your
name during the ceremony?
Finally! Sabi ko talaga sa sarili ko,
Finally! First time ko gumawa ng
comedy tapos dun pa ako nanalo. Eh
ang dami kong ginawang mga heavy
drama and I didnt garner any acclaim
so siguro nga doon na talaga ako
papunta towards the lighter side of
the acting world.
What excites you about doing
romantic comedies? Youve done
and released three of them [English
Only, Please, The Prenup, and
Walang Forever] in the last yearand-a-half. Why does the genre
appeal to you?
For one, its lighter. Para kang
hindi nagtratrabaho. Mas fun yung
experience sa set. Hindi yung mayatmaya sinasampal ka, sinasabunutan
ka, at umiiyak. Its different. I feel
like mas nailalabas ko yung true self
ko, yung tunay na ako. Light naman
talaga kasi ako kasama in real life.
This kind of work, for me, comes more
naturally.
If it comes to you so naturally,
do you ever see yourself in the
characters you play in these romcoms?
Yes! The character of Tere in English
Only, Please, thats me! Let me share
the story of how that character
came to life. That role was very
experimental because during the
shooting of that film, hindi ko alam
na meron pala silang hidden camera
rolling sa loob ng dressing room ko.
So nakukuha nung camera yung
mga times na ginugulo ko si Derek
[Ramsay], yung mga staff. And then
after, tinawag ako ni direk [Dan
Villegas] tapos pinakita niya sa akin
yung footage. Sabi niya na yun ang
gawin ko, yan si Tere!
Theres this notion that men dont
enjoy rom-coms, but what sort
of lessons can guys pick up from
watching these kinds of films?
Kasi pag romantic comedy films,
nakokornihan or nababaduyan ang
guys. Pag sa girls, gusto nila kasi
nakakakilig. I think men should
watch these films for a change. They
should try to absorb what goes on in
the story. Kadalasan, what happens in
the movie is what can happen in real
life. The truth is, relationships are and
can be funny. As a couple, youll fight,
but then youll laugh about it after.
When you think about it, rom-coms
kind of mirror how relationships are
in the real world.
Walang Forever, which was shown
in the 2015 Metro Manila Film
Festival, is your second rom-com
under the direction of Dan Villegas.
It seems like youre his muse.
Whats it like working with a

talented filmmaker who is changing
the game when it comes to this
genre?
Si direk Dan, pag nakatrabaho mo
mukha siyang masungit, pero ang
sarap niya katrabaho. Maloko siya
kasi bata pa rin siya. Its amazing
to work with people who create that
light environment. Para lang kaming
naglalaro. Sorry for the term, pero
para lang kami nag-gagaguhan on
the set. Hes the type of director who
feels whats going on in the scene. He
knows the emotions, asks you what
you think, and taps into that. He
gives you the freedom to play with
the role.
This is your fourth cover for FHM
and a lot has changed in your life
since then. Does showing skin for
the camera and channeling your
sensual side ever get comfortable?
Yes. It gets easier.
What has the experience been
like? We first featured you as a
StarStruck alum, and now youre an
award-winning, top-billing actress.
Youve kind of grown up with the
magazine.
Well, the first cover, thats before I
even got pregnant with my son. I
even think I was pregnant during the
shoot and just didnt know it. That
time, ayokong magpakita ng kahit
ano! The second, nanganak na ako,
so I had a lot of inhibitions because
of my stretch marks from childbirth.
Dumami yung limitations! For the
third cover, which was a little over
two years ago, I was already fit. I was
more confident.
And what about this time around?
You seemed to have your game-face
on during the whole shoot.
Okay na ako! I was super comfortable
with the team, especially with Mark
[Nicdao, photographer], who shoots
most of my stuff.
Dont you find it weird and kind
of ironic that, the older you get,
the more confident you are in your
sexiness?
Ha ha! Yes, it is kind of weird. I think
its because marami na rin akong
pinagdaanan and I feel like before,
when I didnt have a kid, medyo
mataba ako so I wasnt confident.
Pero nung tumagal, I got in shape
and became more conscious and
confident with my body.
What advice can you give girls who
are scared of getting in touch with
their sexual selves?
As long as youre comfortable, lalabas
na yung confidence. Embrace your
body type. Embrace kung ano talaga
at kung sino kayo. Mahalin mo lang
yung sarili mo tapos positive na ang
lalabas rin mula sayo.
Would you say that theres a lot of

acting involved in terms of posing
for FHM? Do you need to get into a
certain character?
Its more about movement and
attitude. Whatever is going through
your head should be projected toward
the camera so the audience can feel
it. Wala lang lines and walang damit
masyado! Ha ha!
Now that youve been doing a lot
of rom-coms, is there any fear of
being typecast into a certain box?
You know, the she-can-only-doromantic-comedies-and-nothingelse box?
Okay lang sa akin. Walang fear of
being typecast. Payag ako kung ako
pa ang susunod kay Pokwang, ha ha!
Youre naturally funny, which is
needed in creating a successful romcom, but would you call yourself a
romantic?
Oo naman! Wala lang akong karomansa ngayon! Ha ha! Pero
romantic talaga ako, maniwala kayo!
Lately, Pinoy pop-culture seems
to be obsessed with the concept
of hugot. What do you think are
the positive and negative effects of
being too open about and playful
with our emotions?
Sa negative munaminsan
sumosobra na. People sometimes
expose their emotions too much.
Sometimes it should be kept inside,
be kept private. Yung tipong magpo-post ang isang tao sa Twitter
ng hugot tapos iisipin mo Anong
pinagdaraanan nito? Ano ba yan!
On the positive side, however, its
nice because it can make you laugh.
Theres a comedy aspect to it.
The latest movie is called Walang
Forever. Sorry, but in the spirit of
your new romantic comedy, we have
to ask, naniniwala ka ba sa forever?
No. Nothing is permanent in this world.
Lahat naman tayo mamamatay di ba?
Lahat ng gamit at bagay mawawala at
masisira. Mayroong pang-lifetime, pero
sorry, walang forever.
That being said, you were joking
a while ago during the shoot that
this will be your last cover for FHM.
Why are you breaking up with us so
soon?
Ha ha! Hindi naman sa ganun. Hindi
na din ako bumabata, so bigay naman
natin sa mga mas deserving. I can
say that doing FHM was one of the
best experiences Ive ever had. Baring
myself for the camera used to be one
of my biggest fears, but after doing
FHM, when I saw how tastefully
done the photos were, masasabi ko
na naging tama ang desisyon ko. Its
rare that youll have an opportunity
like this in your life, so might as well
grab it. Minsan lang yan. FHM
Jennylyn
W O R D S : P O N G M . CASTI L LO
P H O T O G R A P H Y : PAU L M O N D O K
Uber. Airbnb. Two

entrepreneurs roll in
this age: bypass the old
rules of establishment
with a swipe on your
smartphone. We survey
the new caveat emptor*
philosophy and see how
it works Pinoy-style
* Let t he b uy er be wa r e. The b ed ro ck p rin cip le o f fr ee e nt er p ri se
examples of how
RIDING THE SYSTEM

Uber is a ride-sharing smartphone application that originated in San Francisco,
California in 2009, founded by Travis Karanick and Garett Camp, to ease the
everyday commuters dilemma: hailing a cab. It was initally called UberBlacks
because it serviced its customers with black luxury cars in the SanFo area,
providing Uber riders with the experience of a chauffer ride.
It breached traditional government regulation by employing drivers who qualified
to operate an Uber unit according to the companys terms and conditions without
having to go through the rigorous process of applying a government franchise. In
less than four years, Uber has expanded its operations across the globe, starting in
Paris, to Asian cities including Metro Manila, and is now worth over $50 billion.
According to the terms and agreement of Uber operations, 20 percent of
your weekly earnings will automatically be remitted to Ubers online bank account.
Thats their share in the business, explains Velarde. Then 60 percent of what is
left in your Uber Wallet goes to the operator, and the rest go to the driver. He says
that there are days when his Uber driver meets the quota in the first four hours on
the road. As for the surgeor the conditional increase in Uber fares depending on
Since Airbnb was founded, it has
passenger demands and traffic situationthe same distribution of profit applies.
already hosted over 60 million
It took me a little over a month to accomplish the paperwork, says Velarde.
guests worldwide, with Asia as its
Applying to operate an Uber unit starts with an investigation of your car.
fastest growing market in 2015.
You have to submit interior and exterior photos of the car along with the car
registration, he shares. After that, you have to
apply your car under the category Transportation
Network Vehicle Service (TNVS) in the
Department of Trade and Industry (DTI) and the
Basti Velarde, 27, an interior designer at a
Land Transportation and Franchising Regulatory
multinational design firm based in Ortigas,
Board (LTFRB).
purchased a brand new Toyota Innova mid last
The first few steps are for the accreditation
year, plunking a downpayment of P100,000
of the provisionary authority (PA)or permission
and amortizing P18,000 a month to pay off the
to operatewhich took Velarde two and a
balance. He was looking to provide his young
half months to accomplish. While you need to
family with their own ride, but he was also well
accomplish a certificate of public convenience
aware that paying off the cars amortization would
(CPC) to complete your business permit, you may
put a dent in his finances. So I enrolled my Innova
start operating your unit once your Uber account
in Uber, and now I realize that I would have had
gets activated five days after applying for the PA.
difficulty paying for the car if it were not for the
Karun Arya, Uber communications lead
ride sharing service, Velarde says.
in South Asia, said in an interview with the
On his first month of operations, Velarde
Philippine Daily Inquirer last year: In Manila, the
earned P40,000 net, but he still keeps his day job.
response we have received both from riders and
I commissioned my uncle for the job. He drives our
drivers has far exceeded our expectations and
Uber unit five days a week. We have a quota of at
we continue to see tremendous growth.
least 15 passengers a day. So far, our business relationship has been going well. The money he earns
As of writing, the Uber office in the
from Uber ensures that his cars monthly amortization is met, and he gets to help his uncle out.
Philippinesand in Asia, for that matterhas not
Anne Patulan, 32, an OFW based in Macau, purchased a 24 sq.-m studio condominium unit at
disclosed any information of the industry growth
The Beacon Tower in Makati in 2013. She bought it for P2 million and pays a monthly amortization of
in the said region in terms of company profit.
P30,000.
About the same time as Uber, Airbnb was
I bought the unit for personal use. I wanted a place to stay in whenever I come home, Patulan
founded by Brian Chesky, Joe Gebia, and
says. But coming home to Manila only once or twice a year made her rethink her investment. I
Nathan Blecharzyk in San Francisco, California,
enrolled it to Airbnb to help me with the mortgage. On average, she gets three Airbnb guests in a
in 2008. Airbnb, which is a term short for
month, mostly international tourists. Her Airbnb rate is at P1,600 per night, which can be paid online
air mattress bed and breakfast, is an online
via credit card transaction. My Airbnb bookings already cover half of my monthly amortization, but I
marketplace for people who wants to share
dont really want to call it a business. Im renting it out only when I am not around. If it were a business,
lodging, whether as hosts or guests, while
I would charge more to cover the entire mortgage. To me, [Airbnb] is only a help, I cant solely depend
transacting a peer-to-peer business. Airbnb aims
on it to pay the bills, Patulan says.
to serve budget-minded travelers and property
Uber and Airbnb are two prime examples of the new online sharing service platform that is
owners looking for another tool to earn income.
currently disrupting the status quo of free enterprise. Dubbed as the new sharing economy, these
In the last quarter of 2015, the Department
online sharing services are bypassing the rules of entrepreneurship, ownership, and even government
of Tourism recorded almost 400,000 tourists
policies by placing the power directly on the ones doing business and using the service through the
arriving in the Philippines, with Koreans being
power of smartphone technology.
the top visiting market. This number generated
Smartphone applications make things so much easier. In a way, developers like Uber and Airbnb
earnings of up to P168.75 billion. Airbnb sees
have set up the online infrastructure that makes it easy for anyone to be entrepreneurial, says Art
Asia as an important region for its market with 400
Ilano, professor of marketing management and strategic planning at the University of the Philippines.
percent growth across the board, says Airbnb Asia
The barrier to entry has been stripped away. So now anyone with a car can do ride-sharing, and
communications officer Lena Snnichsen, the
anyone with spare accommodations can play hostel. Which is what Velarde and Patulan are doing.
Philippines is among the faster growing markets.
In a way, the new sharing economy also puts less pressure on the dream to own things.
Professor Ilano explains that the growth of
According to financial guru Robert Kiyosaki in his book Rich Dad Poor Dada man known for his
Airbnb in the Philippines can be rooted in the fact
contrarian, often controversial, views on many things money-related the dream of owning a home
that investing in real estate has become more
is an expensive and misguided dream. It requires you to plonk down a lot of money, which essentially
affordable in the past decade, prompting investors
could just be invested in something that is more economically productive for you. There are people
to make use of their properties in more ways than
who buy cars and could barely afford the monthly dues. Ilano says that the more practical decision is
one. Sometimes its better to just rent things and
to put your money into a vehicle or tool that potentially earns you profit.
pay for the things on an as-needed basis, he says.
[Uber and Airbnb] is a way of making money work for you, Ilano says.
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the new economy

Its like the concept behind time-sharing condominiums.
Why own a condo full-time when you only use it once or
twice a year?
Enrolling your house or apartment unit in Airbnb
is easy, says Patulan. You just have to sign up for an
Airbnb account online, which you can opt to use as
a guest or as a host, she adds. Registration is free,
and Airbnb even sends over an official photographer
to take photos of your unit you can use on the
website. You just have to submit a valid ID to verify
your identity, and may start hosting immediately after
application has been processed, she says. For guests,
on the other hand, you are free to browse through over
one million listings worlwide.
Hosts are paid through bank deposits, credit card
transactions, or money transfers. Patulan says that only
three percent service fee from that goes to Airbnb to
cover the cost of processing the payment transaction.
Airbnb listings have a wide range of prices to cater to
all kinds of travelers, adds Patulan.
Property consultant Chris Villamor shares that out
of the 2000 units for the two towers at The Beacon,
only about 60 percent are lived in by actual residents.
The rest of the unit owners have their spaces rented,
Villamor says. Technically, most condominiums dont allow
the space-sharing system because there is a minimum
lease term of six months. But since Airbnb doesnt affect
the business negatively, we take it as a sign that our
properties are exposed to potential foreign buyers, he
says. So, we just double our security measures to the
Airbnb clients of The Beacon unit owners, says Villamor.
After almost 40 succesful Airbnb hostings this
year, I can say that the new sharing economy is
teaching customers and operators to trust strangers.
You have to trust how the system works, says Patulan.
Transportation Franchise and Regulatory Board (LTFRB) in accepting applications of interested

ride-sharing services operators for at least 20 days. The petition was passed by Angat Tsuper
Samahan ng mga Tsuper at Operator ng Pilipinas Genuine Organization Transport Coalition,
Incorporated (STOP and GO) because the sudden increase in the operation of the transportation
network vehicle services (TNVS) units have caused other public utility vehicles a significant loss in
income. Less than three months prior to the TRO, the LTFRB accredited ride-sharing smartphone
application Uber as a Transport Network Company (TNC) to legitimize its operation in the country.
As of this writing, 4,465 accredited TNVS units are left unaffected of the TRO while 3,500
applications for TNVS operations are put on hold.
Romy Ramos, 48, former driver of a metered taxi, says that their income significantly
decreased since the popularity of ride-sharing services. Mas humirap na ang kumuha ng
pasahero kasi mas marami nang nag-u-Uber o kaya Grab[Taxi], he shares. Yung boundary
namin, hindi na kakayanin makuha ng dose oras lang sa daan. The taxi company where
Ramos used to work required him to hit at least P2,300 per day, P700 of which he was able
to take home. Ipinatupad na nila ang P10 rollback sa pasahe ng taxi, pakiramdam namin nun
nabawasan pa yung kita namin, shares Ramos. He added that the taxi transport system in the
country pushed drivers to work beyond their required hours just to meet the boundary and be
able to put food on the table. As of this writing, its been two months since Ramos resigned as
a taxi driver.
On the other hand, Uber operator Velarde says that security and convenience are what you
pay for their services. The reason for the rapid expansion of this kind of service not only lies in
its profitability on the part of the operators and drivers. Uber users find great security in terms
of payment transaction, ride experience, and customer feedback, he says.
Patulan also thinks that aside from earning money by sharing your personal properties, the
new economic system promotes social entrepreneurs. I guess people now are more practical.
If you come to a place and one of your main goals is cultural immersion, then the peer-to-peer
system is the way to go, says Patulan. Also, if youre not going to stay in the room the entire
day, who would need a hotel accommodation that can charge you thousands more only for
plush pillows?
While the sharing system are opening the doors of business to mavericks and newbies, it
greatly affects the sustenance of old players in the industry. In an ideal setup, Professor Ilano
says that it should be easy for big players to retool, like how GrabTaxi allows its metered units
to operate like chauffered private vehicles. Come to think of it, hoteliers should be open to the
idea of hopping into Airbnb by flooding the market with its idle rooms. If anything, big players
should have a natural economic advantage as they have better-managed costs, he adds.
Also, the application of this can extend to other things and services. Anything that involves a
large cash outlay but with minimal daily use can be part of the sharing economy. Think heavy
machinery, specialized tools, specialized facilities such as recording studios.
In the future, anyone can do business just by thinking it. Forget economics and government
policies. But until then, its still caveat emptorlet the buyer beware. FHM
THE NEW CONSUMERS

Mariver Reyes, 26, an IT consultant at a call center
in Taguig, takes either Uber or GrabTaxi going home
from work every night. I prefer booking rides instead of
hailing a cab, especially since my work ends at 3 a.m.,
she shares. Its safer because driver and vehicle details
are directly emailed to you, plus you have an option to
pay via credit card.
Uber initially allowed only credit card transactions
in their application for booking a ride, while GrabTaxi
initially transacted on a cash-only basis. In the last
quarter of the year, both ride-sharing applications
made cash and credit transactions available to the
market. While booking details are readily available for
customers reference, both Uber and GrabTaxi ensure
consumer feedback via their in-app rating window that
appears after each successful ride. Reyes says that as
a consumer, these kinds of apps give more power to
the rider and the driver. Giving feedback is available
for both ends, filtering the system. Velarde adds: At
least with Uber, delinquent or low-rated drivers will
be suspended after a certain number of low ratings
or complaints. We were briefed about that, making us
more careful and considerate as operators and drivers.
Airbnb gives similar services and perks to its consumers, says frequent
traveler Jennica Santos, 23. Reviews are readily available online, so you would
know how your experience will go before making any commitment in booking a
place, she says. Santos believes that aside from the more affordable rates available
in Airbnb, this kind of accommodation allows you to immerse in the culture of the
locals instead of locking yourself up in the hotel room. Ang mentality kasi is susulitin
mo yung hotel room, mahal kasi ang bayad, Santos says.
According to Ilano, big

traditional players should
think of ways to jump in the
new economy to sustain
business and market.
Online applications are

able to reach users from
as many as 50 countries
for Uber, and 190
countries for Airbnb.
BREAKING THE ECONOMY

In December 2015, a temporary restraining order (TRO) on ride-sharing
services Uber and GrabCar was issued by a Quezon City court to halt the Land
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WORDS: ASH MAHINAY
ILLUSTRATIONS: MELVIN CALINGO
nextge
nextge
Millennials have developed new skill sets very different from their fellow dudes of, say,
in AthLeticS
OLD DUDE IS A
Basketball/Football/Team
Sport Player
Athletically, being an alpha male
used to mean one thing: play
ball for the team. It might not
have been the school varsity
squad, or perhaps they rode the
bench, but sporting bros were
sure to have the coveted playerissue varsity jackets and jerseys
that girls love to borrow and
look cute inat the same time
getting definitively marked as the
property of Mr. Jersey Number
24. Going past academic days,
you have the weekend warrior
(or night scrimmage player), who
has the above average fitness
level to show for it, as well as the
humblebrag opportunity to flex his
sporting prowess by inviting a lady
over to watch his gameslyly giving
her eye contact whenever he sinks
a killer three.
MILLENNIAL BRO IS A
Crossfitter/Gym buff
There are many modern bros who
dont play any sports and instead
devote themselves to countless
hours pumping iron in pursuit
of fitness and bodily aesthetic
perfectiontheyve got abs for
days, sculpted pecs, bulging
biceps, and possibly chicken legs
from skipping leg day. Relationship
goals dont revolve around the
girl cheering from the sideline;
rather, Crossfit (and general gym
rat behavior) becomes a couple
activityman and woman can
stare into each others eyes while
furiously attempting 100 crunches.
Its not as glamorous as dropping
shots all over hapless defenders,
but doing a clean and jerk of twice
your dates bodyweight is sure to
stir some of their primal desires.
TradiTional aThleTe or
modern gym buff?
Im an athlete. I want someone
who I can train and be
comfortable with.
PAULETTE
SCORE OLD DUDE 1 MILLENNIAL 1
I dont really excel in many

sports, so Id rather choose
the gym buff since Im a lover
of fitness myself!
PRINCESS
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engent
engent
two decades back. But do the ladies dig all their 2.0 stuff or does old school still rule?
THE PANELISTS
in the kitchen
PAULETTE QUINTO
Model, PMAP Discipline Officer,
Mafae Management
JAZ REYES
99.5 PLAY FM DJ
PRINCESS LEGASPI
Model, TV/Events host
OLD DUDE CAN

Cook actual food
Im cooking is one of the most
legitimate reasons ever for a
girl to head into a dudes man
cave. It implies preparation, hard
work, and that a guy appreciates
a girl enough to slave away in
the kitchen for her. There is no
guarantee that he will be cooking
a delicious meal, and it could even
be a total disaster, but knowing he
can save you from starvation if ever
you were marooned on a desert
island together is always worth at
least 100 man points. Guys who
cook often stick to simpler dishes
(AKA pasta, pasta, and pasta), but
you know what they all say about
them anyway: pwede na magasawa!
MILLENNIAL BRO CAN

Make those latte things na may
design
Even though every human being
likes to eatbecause, you know,
survivallisting down food as an
interest is now a thing because
weve been spoilt for choice with
so many eating options popping
up. In an ironic twist, many foodies
have actually lost the knowledge
of creating their own foodinstead
theyve curated an expansive list of
feeding spots to sate their dates.
Plus, aside from always having
an answer (or three) to Saan
tayo kakain? foodie bros have
mastered arcane techniques such
as creating delicate latte art, which
is infinitely more impressive than
cooking an omelet for the morning
after. Looks wise, at least.
Home-cooked
or home-brewed?
They say that the way to a
mans heart is through his
stomach. Well, apparently thats
also one route to take to get to a
womans heart, right?
PAULETTE
Home-cooked, by far! All

my relatives overseas have
amazing husbands who can
cook up a storm. Besides, I
like mine black, so no thank
you for any milky design that
just ruins the coffee.
JAZ
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in MUSic
WordS or PicTures?
I believe I had fallen in love with
many writers simply by how they
spew out words and weave them
together. Definitely, someone who
isnt lazy and uses intelligent
instead of very smart is
something I am very drawn to.
in the ARt S
JAZ
OLD DUDE MASTERS

Writing and/or drawing
A dudes method of self-expression
back then meant scribbling down
his thoughts in a notebook or
drawing them on a classic blue
Corona sketchpad (spiral-bound, of
course). Fellow dudes discovering
the artistic treasure would
likely cause him to implode in
embarrassment, but if you happen
to be a girl he likes, then romantic
dude may reluctantly share them
with you. Majority of his work may
be baduy as fuck, but theres
something nice about a guy who
takes the time out to make things
with his handsespecially if they
happen to be for and about her.
OLD DUDE CAN

Play the guitarand harana the
girl by the bintana
To be clear, we arent talking about
career band guys here because
they can be real pricks; were
talking about the dude who can
strum simply as a personal hobby.
Said guitar skills come in handy
when impressing a girl because he
can regale her with his very own
rendition of Thinking Out Loud
during alone time. Him singing
along with his string-plucking
skills is a whole different matter
though
MILLENNIAL BRO
CAN
Produce electronic beats
Born in an era of optional music
classes, this bro could have never
picked up an instrument in his life
but hell be the guy who gets to
man the decks in all the birthdays
and office parties. He always has
the newest and catchiest tracks
that youve heard somewhere and
desperately want to find out the
title and who the artist is. Aside
from his DJ-ing prowess, he can
even make his own remixes to
include in heartfelt Spotify playlists
dedicated to his babe.
StringS or beaTs?
A man who takes the courage to sing even
if he sounds really bad is the sweetestand
definitely knows how to use his fingers!
MILLENNIAL BRO
MASTERS
Instagram and photography
This bro constantly pauses and
snaps random things because
you can never have too many
profoundly captioned uploads
on Instagram. Everyones a
photographer these days, but it
still warms a girls heart in a major
way when he uploads a perfectlyshot candid of her looking real hot
and she didnt have any idea he
took it. If the girl is the private type,
then prepare for her wrath, albeit
it comes with everyone calling you
their couple goals because its oh
so sweet.

PAULETTE
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nextgengent
On DAteS
On LAte niG ht tALk S

OLD DUDE WILL
Call you on your
cellphoneor landline
The day is long and the
commute longer, but what
the dude awaits is the
nightly conversationactual
talking on the phone! If his
household is baller, then he
has a cellphone or wireless
telephone to his ear while he
sits on his bed. Otherwise
hes in the kitchen/sala,
lowering his voice whenever
someone passes by.
MILLENNIAL BRO
WILL
Chat 24/7while talking
to other people too
Through the wonders of
mobile data, couples never
need to be out of touch ever
again. Days become running
conversations, which fills the
need for interactioneven
through incomprehensible
strings of emojis. The
downside: bros attention is
highly unlikely to be directed
exclusively towards his lovely
chatmate at anytime.
callS or emojis?
Tone changes and subtle laughs
allow me to feel my man better!
On BReeZY MOVe S
OLD DUDE INVITES
YOU
to the movies
Seeing a flick the old school way
means anticipating and planning
for the next big release. It also
involves the hassle of lining up
for tickets, getting crap seats,
and the possibility of noisy
mouth-breathing people beside
you. The trade-off? Seeing a
movie on the big screen with
a booming sound system still
makes it more enjoyable despite
having high-definition at home.
The whole process of dinner
and bringing the date home after
the film is also added value and
quality chancing timeand
gastos
MILLENNIAL BRO
INVITES YOU
to hang and watch TV series
and torrents
AKA Netflix. This manner
of ingesting media is more
spontaneousmaybe less
special, in a way, but also
more intimate. No pakipot in
the your-place-or-my-place
departmentman and woman
are guaranteed to be together
on the couch (sometimes even
in bed) and oozing hormonal
signals if its time to take it to the
next level. Though if neither lives
independent, then things can
easily get messy fast!
PAULETTE
O L D DUD E T RIES T O
Small talk about stuff
happening in the world
And by stuff happening in
the world, we mean, What
did you have for lunch? and
not the geopolitical situation
in Syria. On the flip side,
this shows the lady that hes
been thinking about her and
really wants to talk, which
may elicit kilig or disdain.
MILLENNIAL BRO
LINKS YOU TO
Youtube vids, listicles
and will tag you too
This bros tactics star the
infamous Lets? This
could be done through
private message, but he
chooses to leave it out in
the openit shows that he
wants your attention. Now.
movie seaTs or bed SHeetS?
Pa-simPle or direct?
Im a low maintenance girl. Id

rather watch GoT with you under
the sheets than spend 200 bucks
wrapped in your jacket.
Id rather he has bala and

knows what he wants to talk
about before talking to me.
JAZ

PRINCESS
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PH O TO G RA PH Y
CHARL ES
B UEN CO N SEJO
INTERVIEW
K H Y N E PAL UMAR
S TY L ING
DE B RA BERN AL ES
G RO O MING
A N NE CASTA O
PR O P S TY L ING
G E N IE RAN ADABABISTA
old school
Weve
assembled
fine examples
of character
comedians
whove been
making people
laugh for a
long while
now. Theyre
still on TV, and
they still make
you laugh.
Why are they
still funny?
Heres why...
lol!
the
to
g
n
i
d
r
o
acc
y
m
m
i
J
If today a six-foot-man showed up in a sideways baseball cap,

with his basketball shirt tucked inside his high-waisted pants, then
laughed in a witchy male voice and ended every sentence with I
love you three times a day!, youd probably be more suspicious
than youd be giggling. But this is us describing Jimmy Santos
as a combination of his 80s Mars Ravelo character Bondying, his
early careers turn as TVJ villain, and his natural love for laughs and
basketball. He tells us that he nicked the I love you catchphrase
off doctors prescriptions. Di ba sinasabi ng doktor, O iho, inumin
mo ito three times a day. So sabi ko, I love you three times a day!
[launches into witchy male giggle] And as its becoming clearer that
we cant show you how funny Jimmy Santos is just by talking about
him. We let him do the talking
How much of phrases like I
love you three times a day was
scripted, and how much of it
was impromptu?
Meron silang script na binibigay
sa akin, tapos nag-su-suggest
ako ng mga linya sa mga writers,
pumapayag naman sila. Kadalasan
binabago ko lang yung dulo,
pero minsan nag-iiba man yung
linya, yun pa rin ang pinupunto.
Halimbawa yung linya: Para sa

lahat. Sasabihin ko Its for every
all! O kaya pag magpapasalamat
ako, sasabihin ko Thank you for
your complimentary tickets!
And youve done pretty iconic
commercials back in the
dayall of them with the same
script-tweaking formula?
Oo, ganun pa rin. Yung unang
ginawa kong commercial, sa McDo
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naman, ako unang nag-localize ng

McDonalds. [motions an M over
his head] Binalik ko yung I love
McDo three times a day! Sa Birch
Tree naman naalala ko yung by
word ko dun. (in upbeat, lambast
English voice) Holy Cow! From the
Europe-speaking cow of the green,
green grass of home! Drink Birch
Tree. Its for every all. Dun naman
nagsimula yung every all, kasi sabi
dun sa script para sa lahat. So
ginawa ko its for every all.
And every all must enjoy your
sense of humor. Is that the
secret to staying in the industry
for as long as you have?
Oo. Yan ang kailangan sa industriya
natin. Kailangan friendly lahat.
Ke maliit, ke malakilahat dapat
pakikisamahan mo. Lalo yung mga
crew. Dapat magawa mo yung
trabaho mo nang maayos para
happy lahat. Kasi hindi naman
pera ang pinag-uusapan dito. Ang
importante, maayos yung samahan.
How has the samahan from
TVJ to Eat Bulaga! progressed
so far? Are you planning to
do different things now that
youre out in the barangays in
Juan for All, All for Juan?
Dati kasi, yung tatlo [Wally, Jose
at Paulo], sila yung nagtatakbuhan
sa barangay. Pero ngayon sa bago
nilang mga karakter [as lola Nidora,
Tinidora, Tidora] kailangan nilang
magbihis, mag-makeup. Eh mainit,
kung tatakbo pa sila, huhulas at
huhulas yung makeup nila. So
ang ginawa kami na lang ni Anjo
[Yllana] yung tinoka sa takbuhan.
Is there a new project in the
works that wed be excited to
hear about?
May mga offers. Kasi rito sa
ginagalawan nating hanapbuhay
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ang importante wag ka mawala

sa sirkulasyon. Basta simple at
matiyaga ka rito. Itong ginagalawan
nating hanapbuhay, walang
katapusan itong pag-aaral. Kung
may nakikita ka pang gustong
gawin, walang tigil yan. Dapat
tuloy-tuloy. Yung ibang hindi mo pa
nagagawa wini-wish mo yan para
magtuloy tuloy at matuto ka.
Youre too likable. Have you
never made an enemy?
Ako kasi kaibigan ang hanap ko
hindi kaaway. Kasi ang kaaway
madali. Magbato ka lang ng isang
bote sa kalye, away na yun. Pero
yung kaibigan mahirap hanapin.
Kailangan sincero ka at hindi
makikipag-plastikan. Ngayon
halimbawa, may hindi ka gustong
tao. Madali lang yan: kunin mo
yung cellphone mo: Hello? Hindi
kita marinig! Hello? Sandali, lalabas
ako Yung labas mong yun, hindi
ka na babalik. Kasi pag may times
na may hindi ka gusto bakit ka
makikipag-plastikan? Pero kung
gusto mo naman yung mga tao,
bakit ka iiwas? Kailangan sincero
ka everytime makikipagkaibigan.
And how sincere are you about
comedy?
Mahal ko ang comedy. Bungisngis
talaga kasi ako. Pero para sa
akin ang comedy depende yan sa
sitwasyon. Minsan yun pang hindi
scripted yung ang mas nakakatawa.
Halimbawa may ordinaryong
taong nagagalit-galitan. Sasabihin
niya Ako nga wag mo bibiruin ng
ganito! Wala akong tulog! Galit
na galit yun. Sisigaw ako, Sige!
Anong gusto mo? Walang tulog!
O walang gising? Mapapabulong
siya, Walang tulog. O bakit ka
nagagalit? Matatawa na yun. Yun
ang tinatawag na natural.
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comedy
drama
LONG
Bobet Mejia won a Golden Dove Award for Best Actor in a Dramatic
role. That person isnt comedian Long Mejias father, brother or cousin.
That was Long Mejiaa few years back, when he played out Rene
Requiestas life story in Maalalala Mo Kaya, his full-set-of-teeth smile
turned into awards worthy of uhog and luhathe kind of misery you
wouldnt expect him to do, but wont doubt he could pull off either.
Asked if this means comedians are better at drama than actual
dramatic actors he answers, Sa tingin ko, oo. Kasi si Tito Dolphy di ba
ibang klase magpatawapero pag nagdrama, sobra ring bigat. Pero
ako sa simulat sapul talaga mas gusto ko na maging komedyante.
Puhunan ko na yung comedy.
Why do you say puhunan mo
na yung comedy ever since?
Kasi hindi pa ako artista, nakilala
na ako dahil sa pagpapatawa.
Naipapasok ako sa inuman o
kasal ng mga barkada ko kahit di
ako imbitado dahil gusto raw ako
magpatawa. Hanggang sa yung
mga napapalapit sa akin, yung
mga natatawa sa akin, naging
close rin ako sa mga pulitiko, at sa
mga artista noon. Maski ngayon,
marami akong na mi-meet dahil sa
pagpapatawa.
Who came up with the name
Long?
Yung aking dating director na si
Ipe Felino, director ng Kool ka

lang nung araw. Kasi kasama ko
si Dagul dun sa show, ang dapat
talagang pangalan ni DagulShort.
So ako Long. Pero yung tawag
sa akin nung araw, Bobet Mejia,
Bulacan boy kung tawagin.
What makes comedy, good
comedy?
Sa akin yung bitaw. Sa timing. Kasi
kahit gano kalakas yung comedy,
pag hindi maganda yung bitaw,
wala lang. Sabi nga nilawaley.
Pero meron naman kasing joke
na hindi nakakatawa pero pag
binitawan mo nang maganda, yun
ang tinatawag naPasok! Kasi
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marami akong nakakausap na

hindi lang komedyante, matataas
na tao, matalinong tao, minsan pag
binitawan ko ng joke, kahit corny,
kahit kwento pa nung araw yun,
minsan sasabihin pa nila, Long
alam ko na yung joke na yan eh,
pero nung binitawan mo natawa
ako. Kasi walang lumang joke.
Nasa nagpapatawa yan palagi.
But you were saying earlier
that comedians made good
dramatic actors. Does that
mean you need a level of
maturity, na marami ka
nang dapat pinagdaanan for
you to become an effective
funnyman?
Kailangan, oo. Kailangan yun para
maging effective, kasi dun ka
hinahamon ng sarili mo. Pag ako
nakaharap sa camera, hinahamon
ko yung sarili kong, Oy, may
problema tayong kailangan ayusin.
Karaniwang problema ng tao:
Problema ng bahay, problemang
may asawa. Pero yung komedyante
sa akin, Oy mamaya ka na,
nagpapatawa pa ko rito eh. Kasi
pag harap mo ng camera ang
buhay napakasimple. Walang
problema, lahat nakakatawa.
And to be completely funny,
you should be
Para maging nakakatawa ka,
kailangan nakakatawa ka. Wag
ka magpapatawa ng pilit. Kasi
naniniwala ako na ang comedy
hindi pilit. Pag hindi bagay sayo
i-share mo. Kasi hindi rin naman
lahat ng comedy babagay sayo.
How do you know which type
of comedy isnt for you?
Pulsuhan. Minsan madaling
malaman na may joke na alam
mong hindi para sayo. May joke
na pang beki na hindi ko pwede
bitawan. Alangan naman sabihin
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ko, Luis Manzano, I love you! Pero

kung yung kaibigan kong si Neggi
ang nagsabi, nakakatawa.
So is it harder to make people
laugh as a straight male, than
it is for gay comedians?
Oo, mas mahirap magpatawa ang
lalakikasi ang beki maluwag sila
magpatawa. Kahit mapikon sayo
yung audience hindi ka papatulan
dahil beki ka nga. Hindi tulad
kaming mga lalaki, pag nagpatawa
ka tapos nasaktan yung lalaki baka
magsuntukan kayo. Yung isang
beki na nagso-show, na papansinin
na may magsyota at yung lalaki
hindi naman kagwapuhan tulad
konilalaglag nila yung lalaki. Ang
ganda mo iha, siguro ang daming
pera ng lalaking yan, bakit mo
nagustuhan? Pag ako bumitaw
nun, mapipikon sa akin yung lalaki,
Sira ulo itong si Long ah. Akala mo
gwapo ka! Malamang kung may
bodyguard yun ipabugbog ka sa
labas. Kaya ang ginagawa na lang
namin, sasabihin ko Idol ko yang
kasama mo miss, sana maging
ganiyan din ako. Katulad mo, boss.
Ang swerte mo! Tuluyan mo na
yan. Tatawa siya.
And what makes Long humor
different from your male
contemporaries?
Ang Long na humor sa akinsana
nga mahilera ako sa mga tulad
nilamini-mix ko yung mga idol
kong sina Dolphy, Chiquito, Apeng
Daldal. Para akong nagtitimpla
ng juice. Magmi-mix din ako ng
konting Dennis Padilla, konting
beki, lalagyan ko ng konting
gandang lalaki ni Luis Manzano.
Pag pinagsama-sama mo yun,
patakan mo pa ng konting Eddie
Garcia, patakan mo pa ng Joey
Marquez, pagkatapos ng timplahan,
ilagay mo sa baso ng Randy
Santiago, samahan mo ng kaunting
Tito, Vic, and Joey, yun na yun.
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being
funny
dennis
If Binoe was the Bad boy of Philippine cinema, Dennis Esteban
Baldivia better known as Dennis Padilla (related to Robin only as film
sidekick), tells us I was called the Bad boy of Philippine comedy. It is
difficult to take this title literally when you come across a four-decadeold-in-the-business actor who smiles all the time and calls himself
pilyoyou sometimes forget hes one of those veterans. The kind
whos been dishing laughs since the 70s, working in over a hundred
television shows and films, a pretty prolific feat. Minsan nagjo-joke
sina Luis sa Deal or No Deal na senior citizen na ako. he tells us.
And then theres that little detail about having a late great veteran
comedian for a father
Being Dencios kid, did
comedy come naturally or did
you initially thought of doing
something else just to separate
yourself from who he was then?
No, I didnt try to be different kasi
yun talaga ako. Kinder pa lang
nagpapatawa na ako. Sa classroom.
Im really very talkative, malikot,
hirap ako mag-stay sa isang lugar.
Palagi akong na-pe-face the wall.
Uso yun nung araw pag maharot
ka. Face the wall! But I always find
fun kahit sa most difficult times.
Everytime I enter the classroom,
everybodys smiling kasi maloko ako
at mabiro. Eh during that time, my

dad [Dencio Padilla], was popular
because he was the sidekick of
Fernando Poe, Jr.and during that
time, prime ni FPJ. So my teachers,
and the security guards would
say: Alam mo, manang-mana
ka talaga sa tatay mo. I never
thought of it as, kailangan kong
labanan yun. Pero yung kaharutan
ko, through experience and dahil
sa pakikisalamuha ko sa iba pang
beteranong artista, na po-polish siya.
At which point were you
sure you were starting to get
recognized as Dennis Padilla
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and not Dencios son?

Well, when I started with GMA7kasi
I started with Lunch Date, which
was hosted by Randy Santiago,
Tina Revillathat was the time na
nabigyan ako ng skit portion, dun
ako nabigyan ng exposure. Dun ko
nalaman. Kasi mararamdaman mo
pag yung ka-eksena mo, and even
Randy Santiagosiya yung nagbigay
ng break sa akin sa noontime show
na yunnatatawa siya. And then
nagkataon na one of the main hosts,
nawala. So from being a skit player,
inakyat ako to replace one of the
hosts. Dun ko napatunayan yung
sarili ko. Lunch Date eventually
became Salo-Salo Together. Tapos
yun na, from hosting, I got one after
another, yung pinakasikat was Kool
Ka Lang.
And you also did a lot of
sidekick roles. Is there more
freedom in doing comedy as a
sidekick vs comedy as bida?
Well, yes and no. Ang responsibility
kasi ng sidekick kailangan maging
comic relief ka talaga to begin with.
Sometimes pag masyadong bloody
yung action scene, kapag nilagyan
mo ng comedy sa dulo na-didissolve yung morbidness. So sa
mga action movies, andun talaga sa
sidekick yung task na magpatawa
para gumaan yung eksena. Pero
at the same time, kung natural
comedian ka naman, mapabida or
sidekick, madali lang magpatawa.
Do you think its easier to
make people laugh back
in the day than it is in this
generation?
Yes, actually. Kasi ang attention
span ng tao ngayon, seconds na
lang. Nung araw kasi minutes pa.
But because of modern technology:
laptop, cellphone, Internet, ang
attention span ng tao umikli;
kaya sila nagsasawa agad. Kaya
kailangan ngayon pag bumato ka
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ng comedy mas maiikli. Hindi tulad

dati yung establishing ng comedy:
1, 2, 3, 4, 5. Saka pa lang bibitaw
ng punch. Ngayon 1, 2, 3. Bitaw!
Ganun na comedy ngayon. Tak,
tak, tak. Kaya nga nauso yung mga
pickup lines, kasi within three or
four seconds kailangan naibato mo
na yung punchline. Kaya ako nagiisip din ako ng bagong ibabato ko.
Whats the most bagets joke
youve let slide?
Pinakabagets? Minsan gumagamit
ako ng mga terms na hindi ko
naman usually ginagamit like
charuz. Minsan napapaisip din ako
kung bagay ba sa akin yun? Pero
pag binibitawan ko naman, I can
get away with it. Tapos yung mga
pickup line na: Sana axis ka na
lang. Bakit? Para sayo na lang
umiikot mundo ko. So nag-a-adjust
din ako.
Besides timing and delivery,
what makes an effective
comedian?
You have to respect yung kaeksena mo. Thats the biggest part
of comedy. Especially if youre
working with a senior comedian, be
sure na hindi siya ma-o-offend sa
ibabato mo. Itanong mo muna sa
kanya. Sir, okay lang po ibato ko
ito? lalo na kung medyo personal.
Hindi pwedeng funny ka at
somebody elses expense.
But you tell us youre the bad
boy of comedy. That doesnt
translate to ruffling feathers?
Hindi eh. Bad boy, oo. Pero
hanggang pilyo lang akopagkaone point na lang bastos na, I
stop. Kumbaga kung may axe,
inaakma ko lang yung taga, pero di
ko siya isusugat. Kasi yung ibang
comedian nakakasugat na siya.
Yung joke ko hanggang amba lang.
Bago ka masugatan, I stop, I begin
with another joke. FHM
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FHMS
DEFINITIVE GROUND
RULES FOR
SEXUAL CONDUCT
W O R D S JOHN PAULO AGUILERA
I L L U S T RAT I O N S J U N O AB R E U
After we set these in stone, we expect to end all confusion

regarding the mating game. Not that we think well ever
stop chasing after women, because thats an obvious
inevitability...
01
Pu t y o ur b e st
underwear
f o r wa r d . B a c o n
b r ie f s is gr e a t a n y
o t h e r t im e e x c e p t
wh ile d oi n g t h e
deed.
02
Comparing notes
AKA kiss and
tell between bros
is weird. Imagine
showing a picture
of your girlfriends
nudes to your
barkadahell, no.
A little massage and rub go
a long way (read: awesome
foreplay).
04
Give and take
is essential.
Heed her
requests in
bed, if you
want her to
oblige yours.
Its no surprise that
most people like being
completely undressed while
doing it. Less clothes, less
hassle.
06
Kiss and spoon

after. Sometimes,
she appreciates
these simple
gestures more
than sex itself.
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You dont want your

stomach to be stuffed
when youre about to
do it. No matter how
much at ease you are
with each other. Its
polite courtesy that
neither of you is gassy,
or reeking of ulam .
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She hates it when you

point out her flaws and
insecuritiesor pinch her
love handles, muffin top,
arm flab. It actually kills
the vibe even if its just
meant for lambing.
If ever youre the

adventurous type and
would like to do it in
less discreet places
(by the beach, evening
Edsa traffic), just make
sure to have an escape
plan (palusot) or an
emergency exit.
Pubic protocol: If you

want your partner
shaved and clean
down there, keep
in mind that she
expects the same
from you. Though
majority of men
prefer a caveman
approach when it
comes to their bush.
Take the initiative. Be

the first one to caress,
to impress.
Cleanliness is next
to godliness literally
holds true. Youll be
in for some intense
exploration of each
others spiritual
temple, so a quick
shower before doing it
wouldnt hurt.
No need for pre-game

chicken chokin. Ayaw
mo naman sigurong
kapusin, di ba?
Checking the time is

a no-no. Remember,
youre not in a marathon.
Pwedeng umihi (muna)

rito. The less filled
your bladder is, the
lower the chances of
an unwanted timeout
during the main event.
No playing Hayden
cam, unless both of
you are okay with it.
Your claim to shame
is just one cellphone/
laptop repair away.
N o f o rc e d o r a l
e nt ry. H a nds o f f
he r he a d while
she s giving
yo u he a d.
B e a b o y s c o u t wi t h
condoms. If you had the
courage to ask her out,
s u r e ly y o u c o u ld m u st er
s o m e t o b u y a t a n earby
c o n v e n ie n c e s t o r e .
Please, dont go Hulk
Hogan on her lingerie. Hers
actually cost as much as
three of your favorite boxers
combined.
20
Some actually like having

something to chow on
after (even though you just
basically ate one another).
Pizza or a bucket of
chicken, maybe?
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R ULE S F O R S EXUA L C O N D U CT
30
Drunk sex is usually bad

sex. Two bottles or shots to
set it up is just enough.
Dont put on clothes

immediately after the deed.
It will make her feel like a
hit-and-run victim if you do.
Relish being au naturel for
the moment.
23
Women prefer coming
first; most of the time
its game over when
its the other way
around.
No room for long (and

obviously, dirty) fingernails
if flicking the bean is part of
your plan.
25
A hickey is not
territorial marking,
so be mindful
where you put it.
Your excessive
sucking might
mean days of
inconvenience for
your partner if the
love bite is not
thoughtfully placed.
Your bedroom is a
reflection of your
personality. Make sure the
room is tidy, the sheets
are clean, and overall, it
smells bagong-laba, before
inviting her over.
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Sw i t c h p h o n e s in t o
si l e n t m o d e . Y o u d o n t
want a call from mom
o r a n e x r u in i n g t h e
mo me n t , d o y o u ?
Doing it at her place, especially if she still lives with the
folks, requires being superhero-esque: spider-senses (to
know if someone is coming), The Flash-like speed (putting
on your clothes), and Batmans poker face (as if nothing
happened).
Speaking
of foreplay,
there are
women who
dont orgasm
from sexual
intercourse
alone. There
are times you
need to step
up your extracurricular
activities.
29
For Chrissakes,
no sharing of
toothbrushes!
Sure, youve
essentially
swapped spit
the whole night,
but it doesnt
mean youd have
to completely
forgo your sense
of hygiene.
facebook.com/FHM.ph
twitter.com/fhmphil
fhmphilofficial
The FHM man test

This months challenger...
ALEX
M ED I NA
Badass acting chops is in his bloodline, alright, but could the youngest of the
Medina brood prove as badass in our ultimate hombre test?
Not man
Not man
Man
Man
Not man
Would you ever carry

your girlfriends purse
at the mall if she asked
you to?
Yes, but maybe Ill give it
a maximum of five times.
Man
Not man
Not man
Not man
If the world were to end

tomorrow, what would
your last meal be?
Potato au Gratin, roast
beef with caramelized
onions, strawberry
milkshake, Chicken
Kiev, gelato.
Not man
Not man
If you could blow up one

thing, what would it be?
All the firearms in the
world.
Man
Not man
12/15
Sure, the guy cant
imagine life without
powdered armpitsbut
LOLing over spilled
blood? Tibay , ser .
THE MAN TEST
LEADERBOARD
Have you ever worn your

briefs on top of your
pants and pretended to
be a superhero?
Yes. Spider-man, FTW!
Man
Not man
Have you ever sniffed

used underwear?
Ah, the pleasure it
gives! I smell my own,
mind you.
Man
Not man
What fictional villain

scares you the most?
Id hate to meet a
vampire on a dark
street. Have you ever
seen 20 Days of Night?
That shit is scary!
Man
Man
Not man
Whats the title of the

weirdest porno youve
watched?
Type Ko Girlfriend Mo.
Man
Not man
Can you name one highranking FHM woman

youve had an
unforgettable experience
with?
I was hoping you guys
would help me out on
that department
Whats the worst thing

you were teased about
as a kid?
I looked wimpy thats
why kids pick on me. I
mean, I looked wimpier
before. But theyre all
good friends now.
Man
Have you ever taken

secret selfies?
Hindi eh. Its on
Instagram.
Man
Man
Whats the name of the

coolest pet youve ever
had?
Best everProzac. I
miss him. See you soon,
bud.
Have you ever farted

openly in public?
Not exactly openly
its always the ninja
farts that deal the worst
damage.
Man
Not man
Which romantic comedy

makes you feel giddy
inside?
More than giddy, it
makes me hopeful for
love50 First Dates.
Man
Not man
Se f Ca d a y o n a
Tirso Ripoll
Wally Bayola
Dan Villegas
J a y Co n t r e r a s
Boy2 Quizon
Jose Manalo
Ranidel
de Ocampo
Ch i t o M i r a n d a
Alex Medina
A l d e n R i c h a r ds
RA Rivera
Gloc-9
Loonie
M e d w i n M a r f il
Brandon Vera
1 5 /1 5
1 4 /1 5
1 4 /1 5
1 4 /1 5
1 3 /1 5
1 3 /1 5
1 3 /1 5
1 3 /1 5
1 3 /1 5
1 2 /1 5
1 2 /1 5
1 2 /1 5
1 2 /1 5
1 2 /1 5
1 2 /1 5
1 1 /1 5
INTeRVIeW: PONg CASTILLO
Man
Have you ever had blood

in your hands that was
not yours?
LOL! Many times.
ILLUSTRATION: LOUIS AReNAS
Whats the longest

youve gone without
wearing deodorant?
Three days. I use a
powder deodorantits
a necessity. I dont know
how Id live without such.
Fil-Jap model
Mayumi Yokoyama
makes a stronger
case for obsessing
WNic
in all things
Japanese
thE
here
Things
e
A e
R
Photography: E JAY LE U N G OF M I D N I G HT B ON K E R S
Interview: P ON G CA ST I L LO
Styling: D E B R A B E R NA LE S
Makeup: J A N I NA D I Z O N
Hair: M J R ON E F OR CY N OS I N S I D E H A I R CA R E
Mayum i
Here at FHM HQ , we try our best to be

congenial internationalists.
That is, we work to be good
friends with women of all
nations, and you know weve
had more than our fair share of
them. But if youve been paying
attention, its our fellow Asians
that are winning us over lately.
Eyes are really expressive, they
show personality and emotions,
says carshow model Mayumi
facebook.com/FHM.ph
in between takes, breaking the

silence as the team admires her
from behind the camera. Siguro
its the innocence and mystery in
our eyes that draw people in. Our
expressions make you want to
know more about us, she adds.
Its obvious what we are all
crazy for. Its the look in those
eyes
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www.fhm.com.ph
Mayum i
We always see you in car shows. Are

you a car enthusiast?
I drive a Honda Civic, but I only know
basic car maintenance. Car shows are
just fun. Iba yung vibe to have all these
car geeks around you. They are very
passionate and intense.
Do you agree when they say, Ah,
babae kasi... when it comes to
women driving and maintaining a
car?
I dont think girls are any less careful
or skilled when it comes to driving.
Were actually very observant, so pag
may narinig or naramdaman kaming
parang mali sa kotse, pinapa-check
namin agad yan! Siguro more girls
are just less technical when it comes to
cars.
But ironically, more girls are
impressed by nice carsagree?
Well, that could be true for most of
us. Im a fan of sports cars, but if I
have the money for it, I wont drive a
Maserati or a Ferrari. Id rather get to
have a Nissan 370Z or a Toyota 86!
Lets talk about how the shoot went.
You remarked how gravure-like the
photos turned out
Everything just feels comfortable.
The styling and the whole concept
are laidback yet sexy. I love it! I hope
you bring back your gravure specials,
though. Id like to be in it with my best
friend Marilena [Shirakawa, also a
carshow model]!
If we do, we promise to let you know.
Just last year we had Japanese AV
idol Maria Ozawa on the cover. How
in touch are you with your
Japanese roots?
I was born in Yokohama, Japan. Of
course, Japanese household manners
are still practiced in our family. We say
itadakimasu before meals. It means,
Lets eat, and is a polite term of, to
receive. It is meant to show appreciation
for having food on the table.
You sure know how to show your nice
side, but we hear Japanese girls have
a naughty alter ego in the bedroom.
Is it true?
Ha ha! Thats true! We look innocent
and young, so its extra surprising
when we show aggression. When my
naughty side kicks in, oh boy, you
must behave and obey my rules, ha ha!
How naughty or nice can you get?
Lets just say that if youre lucky
enough to be with me in the bedroom
then you can see me lounge in my
white nighties or walk around the
room naked, ha ha! Being comfortable
is the sexiest and naughtiest you can be
with you partner.
Tell us, how do we get chummy with

a girl?
Spoil her. Mabilis kaming kiligin. Also,
always surprise her. If you mean to
get chummy with me, heres a hint: I
have a thing for being mabango and
hairless, ha ha! (winks)
How do you spend quality time with
your man?
I like eating out. Id take my guy to a
nice ramen place or go on movie dates
with him. I also love road trips. FH M
facebook.com/FHM.ph
twitter.com/fhmphil
fhmphilofficial
www.fhm.com.ph
We look innocent and young, so its extra surprising

when we show aggression. When my naughty side kicks
in, oh boy, you must behave and obey my rules, ha ha!
www.fhm.com.ph
facebook.com/FHM.ph
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fhmphilofficial
S h an e R a m o s
has got our
h e ad i n t h e
clouds
TIME
to
FL Y
Photography: E JAY LE U N G OF M I D N I G HT B ON K E R S
Interview: A S H MA H I NAY
Styling: BADJ G E N ATO
Makeup: R IA AQU I N O
Hair: R H OY CE R VA NT E S
S H A N E
R A M O S
Ever hear of the term one

and done? This is where
someone does anything once
and never again. Sometimes
the single take is due to
massive failure, it could
also be too frightening to
do again; sometimes its
situationallike you cant
afford to throw that Project
X-level party one more
time because youre on the
barangay watchlist. But
in Shane Ramos case, its
because shes achieved her
dream to shoot like this and
tells us shes ready to move
on to the next thing right
away. Thats right, this is
the first and last time well
see herbut its one hell of a
memento.
I remember you told me this
is your first shoot that you
deemed sexy, why did you
wait so long?
I found that entering this kind
of industry is not easy, so it
took me a lot of courage to
finally decide to do this shoot
and upgrade my modeling
career even further.
And what convinced you to
do it?
What I did was ask my
mentors for advice. I
researched and asked around
to make sure of what to

expect with a shoot like this
and learned that entering
this comes with a lot of
responsibilities to carry.
Maintaining a sexy body and
healthy lifestyle must come
first now, ha ha! It also took
me a lot of time to boost my
confidence and self esteem.
You said you thought you
had nothing to show but we
really disagree with that.
Two obvious reasons are in
front of us right now
Ha ha! Minsan kasi
dinadaga yung dibdib ko
malaki lang talaga siya pero
duwag. But it just came to
a point that where I asked
myself: Why not take the
break? Im very grateful for
this opportunity given to
me.
Especially since you
believe that modeling is
not forever...
Yes, we all know modeling
is not a lifetime career for
We all know
modeling is not a
lifetime career for
mostwe all need
a backup! I started
as a dancer on
Wowowillie, but,
ever since college,
my dream was really
to travel the world.
mostwe all need a backup!

I started as a dancer on
Wowowillie, but. ever since
college, my dream was really
to travel the world.
And thats your next goal
right?
Yes, because I put it on my
real life bucket list too. I just
love to travel and another
one of my goals is to bring
my family too. Thats the
main reason why I want to
become a flight attendant. If
theres one thing I plan for
my future, it is to fly soon,
ha ha! FH M
NEWS
W H AT TO BU Y AND HOW TO WEAR IT
WORDS
AS H MAH I NAY
P H OTO G R A P HY
MAR K J E SALVA
JOGGER
PANT S
P8 9 9 .75
run
every day!
G i v e y o ur p a n t s a b r e a k
w i t h R RJ s ne w l i n e
www.fhm.com.ph
facebook.com/FHM.ph
If youre looking to make a

change in your style this year,
we recommend pulling the
trigger on a pair of joggers
or like, five, one for every day
of the week. Repeat the life
out of them, because no one
can really say that daily
joggers are sloppier than
wearing the same beater pair
of denims. In fact, a cozy
twitter.com/fhmphil
fhmphilofficial
heather gray pair of these

RRJ Strike Series joints may
even be slightly dressier than
your jeans because your
comfiest jeans usually arent
likely to be your most
presentable pair. These
joggers are way more
susceptible to grime and filth
because of the light shade,
but then thats why you
should walk home with a full
stack of them.
F HYMlE
ST
H unter
in the
N i ght
Exploring st reet st yle
PHOTOGRAPHY: ARTU NEPUMUCENO
WORDS: ASH MAHINAY
MAkEUP: IYA YUjUICO STYlING: GElA MUOz MODElS: VINCE VANDORPE Of MERCATOR AND jENNICA SANCHEz
F HYMlE
ST
Wh e n was the last tim e

you ditched a ride and just walked around a neighborhood
at night? Take advantage of New Years good vibes and
roam under the lights of fireworks; heres the gameplan:
Uber your way to a hotspot to free yourself from the
tyranny of parking. Pick a random place, preferably with an
outdoor seat to keep your sense of adventure from being
dulled by the cold embrace of the A/C. Bounce over to a
different spot on foot and repeat. Most importantly, be well
dressed so people wont mistake you and your pals for a
bunch of vagrants.
OPENING SPREAD:
THIS PAGE
On Jennica:
Stussy Shirt,
P1,950, Trilogy;
Boyfriend Jeans,
P795, COPPER;
Reflective Sunnies,
Wholesalebuying.
com, P350
On Vince:
Premium Baseball
Jersey, P1,200, QTR
Clothing
On Vince:
Crooks & Castles
Pullover, P1,998,
The Rail; Illest
Cargo Joggers,
P1,998, The Rail,
Diamond Leather
Sneakers, P3,698,
The Rail;
Reflective
Sunglasses,
Ray-Ban
On Jennica:
Knit Crop Top,
P300, EFFY;
Leather Skirt, P620,
COPPER; Baseball
Cap, P250, CAIA
The Label; Bomber
Jacket, Topman
F HYMlE
ST
On Vince:
S/S Hoodie,
P1,300,QTR
Clothing; Vans Army
Green Shorts,
P2,298, The Rail;
Lunar Force One,
Nike
On Jennica:
Blue Co-Ords, P495,
COPPER; Grey
Cardigan, P350,
Mental Clutter;
Superstars, adidas
On Vince:
Diamond Mint
Coach Jacket,
P3,598, The Rail;
Stussy Tee, P1,950,
The Rail
FHM
A
JANU
RY
Michiko
Magno
She lets you know what youre missing out on
eing a mix of several

Asian bloodlines, most
predominantly Korean,
Japanese, and Filipino,
you would never expect
that this Oriental beauty would have
a feisty side to her, that is, once
we got her a bit more comfortable.
Because Michiko Magno has an aura
of innocence surrounding her petite
frame, which made it so fun getting
to know her and getting a glimpse of
her naughtier and sexier side that she
only shows to a few lucky gentlemen.
Without further adieu, lets get to
know this happy little surprise a bit
more shall we?
Have you ever been to Japan or
Korea?
Ive been to Korea but only to the
tourist sites. Ive never been to Japan
where my father is.
So youve lived here in the
Philippines all your life?
Yes, with my family. Im a city
girl through and through. Laking
Marikina po ako.
You look really young. Are you still

in school?
Im 22 years old but I stopped 2 years
ago since I wanted to be a model.
What do you like about modeling?
I want to be famous, especially in the
magazine industry, ha ha! Right now,
I think Im doing okay for myself since
the job can support my lifestyle.
Well, thats great then. So how did it
feel to finally get to pose for us?
Syempre masarap sa pakiramdam, ha
ha! A lot of people will get to see the
feature, including my ex, ha ha!
Oh, do we sense a bit of bitterness?
Not really. I just want him to see kung
ano na ako ngayonwhat hes missing
out on.
Oh, thats pretty cold. Have you
changed a lot from the way you
before?
I used to wear simpler clothes and I
didnt really like exposing skin. But
now, I think yung pagpapaganda at
pagpapa-sexy na ang nasa isip ko.
Sometimes, Ill go to gym and other
times I would go play badminton to
keep my figure.
We bet you have a pretty big
Quickfire
Round
Sashimi or
Galunggong?
Galunggong
Dirty or Clean?
Clean
Lights on or
Lights off?
Lights off
Brain or Heart?
Even though
being practical
is good, the
heart is what
reminds us that
were alive.
A A R ON E B I O
CH I S E A LCA NTA R A
ST Y LI N G :
PATR I C K E B I O
MAK E U P AN D H AI R :
J U LI E E B IO
FHM
A
JANU
RY
audience watching you when you

smack the shuttlecock around. Are
guy friends making their move now
that they know youre single?
There are some but as of now, hindi
pa ako interesado. Kumbaga, I enjoy
being single for now. Dati kasi
sobrang nakatali ako.
So how are you enjoying being
single?
Simple lang, kasama ko lang yung
mga friends ko araw-araw. Gala rito,
gala roon, pa-food trip-food trip,
tamang enjoy lang, ha ha.
That seems to be the thread with
girls after breakups, nowadays.
Yeah, its usually the time to improve
on yourself and focus on your career.
Minsan dun mo lang mapapansin yung
mga kailangan mong baguhin sa sarili
mo, so take your time.
Do you have any New Years
resolutions for 2016?

Im planning to fly to Japan so I can
visit my father.
What do you like best about the
Japanese culture?
I really like their food. I love sushi
and noodles, and also they have very
different tastes in fashionmaybe
because they can layer because its so
cold there, ha ha!
Yeah, the weather there would be
great for cuddling. Do you think that
makes Japanese women are more
malambing?
Yeah, the way Japanese talk is very
malambing and sweet; nakatutuwa
silang pakinggan!
Yeah, weve seen a lot of women be
malambing to men all the time on
some videos on the Internet weve
watched.
Oh, like porn? Ha ha!
Well now that youve mentioned it

have you watched any?
Yeah, ha ha! I think I saw some a while
back, when I was 18 or so with some
friends, ha ha! I think theyre pretty
sexy. Especially the way they emote,
yung umiiyak-iyak pa, nakaka-horny!
Oh well, by any chance are you the
same in bed?
Ha ha! Actually yes, especially when I
get a bit drunk!
And how do men react when you get,
um, emotional?
Well, siyempre todo bigay at
nakikisabay rin sila sa akin, ha ha!
Do you like it rough?
Oo, sobra! I really like to lick his ears
and pinch his body all over. And I want
my guy to pull my hair and tell me
masarap ako, ha ha! FH M
Michikos
life this
month
Come to bed na...
facebook.com/FHM.ph
Wanna scratch my ears?

twitter.com/fhmphil
fhmphilofficial
You can call me bi(pole)ar

www.fhm.com.ph
Breakfast
Egg burrito in wholewheat tortilla with

salsa
Morning snack
Cinnamon choco
oat square;
peppermint
BROkie (brownie
cookie)
Eggs for complete protein

gain, and whole-wheat
tortilla for good complex
carbs. The cilantro salsa
will add flavor sans excess
calories.
Fiber-rich and baked,

these are perfect for
energy-boosters. Plus
its vegan!
WIN AT LIFE
THE
LAZY
MANS
FOOD
RESOLUTION
Lunch
Salisbury steak
with beans and
corn on a cob
Homemade patties
from lean portions
of beef grilled to
perfection, partnered
with nutrient-filled
carbs and/or vegetable
side dish.
Move over fast food, weve

listed down diet delivery
services that will help you
start the year rightand with
the least amount of effort
Afternoon snack
Grilled chicken
sandwich with
sweet potato fries
This mini sandwich
will fill you up with
enough protein and
carbohydrates during
quick breaks.
PHOTOGRAPHY:
HEIDI AQUENDE
WORDS:
CAM ARCILLA
Dinner
DIET DIVA
Grilled steak with

mashed potatoes
and side salad
These high-protein
dinners are best
consumed after a
workout as the body can
digest better and absorb
more protein for muscle
recovery.
It may sound a bit girly but Diet Diva just launched their Lean Machine
programa protein-rich diet meal plan prepared for men who work out.
The plan was to keep it simple, affordable, and convenient, but no
ready-made food. It tastes so good, it's like you're not even dieting,"
Diet Diva founder, Kakki Teodoro says.
Price:
P500-700/day
Calorie count:
2000 kcal
Delivery locations:
Metro Manila, with additional
charge in nearby areas
Dessert
Kiwi raspberry
yogurt with dark
chocolate maple
granola
Fresh fruit, high-protein

yogurt with added fiber,
and a punch of maple
granola sweetener, this
snack will help repair
muscle tissues and
restore blood sugar
levels after a workout.
BREAKFAST
Breakfast
Oatscaldo
(Arroz caldo
thats made out of
oatmeal!)
A breakfast dish thats
made of raw oats,
garlic, ginger, spring
onions, and egg for
protein, to jumpstart
your day.
Morning snack
Squash
pancakes
Made from only

two ingredients:
squash and eggs.
Lunch
Lean beef karekare
LUNCH
The beef serves as

the main component,
which is a high source
of protein, cooked with
ground peanuts, yogurt,
and vegetables such as
pechay, sitaw, and okra.
This is often matched
with brown or corn rice.
Afternoon snack
Malunggay
biscuits
Malunggay is known as
a superfood because
its rich in antioxidants.
Dinner
Chicken sisig
DINNER
Diced chicken breast

mixed in yogurt,
vinegar, egg white,
carrots, beans, and
chili. Served with brown
or corn rice.
HAPPY DIET DELIVERY

Their aim is for everyone to join the healthy revolution. Happy Diet
Delivery boasts of their meals that mainly consist of Filipino cuisines.
Marketing head Patricia Kalingking says they were surprised that
most of our clients range from ages 40 to 60. Everyone is becoming
health conscious.
Price:
P500 / day
Calorie count:
1200, 1500, and
1800 kcal
Delivery locations:
Metro Manila
UPGRADE
Breakfast
Paleo Manila
Fresh Catch Pesto
Tuna Cakes with
Chopped Salad
Local tuna is molded

into patties, minus
the additives, fillers or
extenders, then herbs
and spices are added
for flavoring. It is paired
with their all-natural,
dairy-free, vitamin-filled
pesto and salad.
Morning snack
Paleo Manila
Lemon Bliss Balls
Paleo Manila's lemony

bliss balls is a good
source of energy being
that it only consists
of nuts, dates, and
lemonall natural and
dairy-free ingredients.
Lunch
Paleo Manila
Korean Bibimbap
with Special
Gojuchang Sauce
A diabetic-safe
version of the Korean
traditional dish. Lean
beef, spinach, carrots,
shiitake mushrooms,
on a bed of Paleo
cauliricemade
of 100 percent
cauliflower florets.
Afternoon snack
Paleo Manila
FitFlexFlax
Honey Craisin
Bars
It provides fat-burning
properties from alpha
linolenic acids (ALA)
and dietary fiber,
making it a go-to
supplementary snack
post-workout.
Dinner
Paleo Manila
Jerk Chicken
with PaprikaSpiced Yucca,
Caramelized
Onions and Grilled
Pineapple Rings
The chicken is sweet
yet spicy. The dish
is served with grilled
pineapplehigh in
antioxidantsand
paprika-spiced
yuccaa starchy tuber
that is rich in vitamin C,
dietary fiber, folate, and
potassium.
PALEO MANILA
Paleo Manila (pronounced pel-yow) promotes the paleolithic

lifestyle (the caveman diet), bringing in all-natural food that can be
customized according to the health conditions of their clients. And
did we mention that Paleo doesn't count calories? Yup, they just limit
the serving sizes of the food, which is awesome for us heavy eaters.
Maden Krista Velando, Paleo Manilas research and development
supervisor, guarantees "that clients will feel satisfied with our food.
Price:
P3,750/ week for
regular portions;
additional payment for
customized meal plans
Serving portions of
protein per meal:
100-250 grams; 1.5 x
regular portion for athletes
and those working out
Delivery locations:
Metro Manila, Rizal,
until Laguna
BREAKFAST
Breakfast
Grilled chicken
with cranberry
cream sauce
sandwich
The chicken breast

compliments the sweet
and tangy flavor of the
sauce and the fresh
vegetables add the
crunch and texture
needed to complete
this hearty, healthy
sandwich.
Morning snack
brownies
These baked
brownies in semisweet chocolates
will give you a kick
of energy in the
morning
Lunch
Lemon rosemary fish

fillet with red rice
LUNCH
The fish is baked then

smothered in a zesty lemon
rosemary sauce, matched
with red rice to fill enough
carbs needed for the day.
Dinner
Afternoon snack
Pork sinigang, a
popular Filipino
dish, often comes
in soup form. But
Lunchbox Diets
version of sinigang
incorporated the
soup with red rice,
while the seasoned
pork and blanched
vegetables are
separated.
A popular snack for

health buffs, yogurt
is a good source
of bone-building
calcium and powerboosting protein.
Dried pork
sinigang
DINNER
Creamy
Delight yogurt
CONTACT
Diet Diva
09177033482/
09178073817
dietdivaph@gmail.com
Happy Diet Delivery
09279184787
happydietdelivery@
gmail.com
Paleo Manila
09256987624
paleomnl@gmail.com
Lunchbox Diet
09177731190
archibenj@yahoo.com
LUNCH BOX DIET

Lunchbox Diet believes that dieting requires proper training for your mind,
your eyes, and your belly. General manager Benj Sanvictores says that by
enrolling in their meal program, we will help you control what you eat for the
day. When you get used to the mealsespecially when youre already visually
trainedyoud be able to improve your digestion.
Price:
P1,700 /week
Calorie count:
1,200, 1,500, 1,800,
and 2,000 kcal
Delivery locations:
Metro Manila; additional fee
of P50 for nearby areas
UPGRADE
HOW I DID IT
This software
engineer is
bringing Pinoy
rock n roll to
the digital age
I started out as a fan. When I was
in college, I was a fan of local bands
like Wolfgang and Slapshock, among
others, and I used to go to all of their
gigsnow, I'm the one organizing and
promoting these events.
When I graduated, I became
a software engineer, and thats
when I decided to create a website
that can be a forum for rockers like
myself online.
By word-of-mouth, Rakista.
com gained followers. Eventually,
there came the demand for gigs, so
I invited some local bands to play,
and I guess thats how the Rakrakan
Festival got started.
Rakista Radio was just a feature
we added to the forum in 2012.
But then I saw that there was a
demand for online radio, especially
among overseas Filipino workers who
miss Original Pinoy Music.
Its 100 percent Pinoy rock n
roll, dedicated to Pinoy bands,
because we also saw the need for
local bands to have a platform to
spread their musicthey still had a
hard time getting their stuff out there.
When I started, I only really
knew about web and software
development. I didn't really know
anything about handling bands and
organizing events, but these are
things I learned from the bands I've
worked with over the years.
Our main product is actually the
technology, so we have the website,
and then the online radio and the
mobile app. With Rakista Radio, it's

not like you'd just listen to music,
it's interactiveyou can make song
requests, dedications, and even chat
with people through the app.
Organizing gigs can be risky
since there's a lot of expenses,
but we still earn a lot from ticket sales
since there's already thousands of
attendees, especially for the Rakrakan
Festival. I can say that ads are still
our lifebloodwe have partners who
advertise in the website and in Rakista
Radio. But we also earn by doing
other services like web development
and social media management for
bands and other clients.
Social media helps, as long as
you post informative and engaging
content, as opposed to just promoting
your product. Rakista has more than
800,000 followers on Facebook,
facebook.com/FHM.ph
twitter.com/fhmphil
CV
Harold
ridz
Solomon,
36
Currently:
Founder and
CEO, Rakista.ph
Founder and
developer,
Rakista Radio
Founder and
lead organizer,
Rakrakan
Festival
Formerly:
Software
engineer
fhmphilofficial
while Rakista Radio has around

230,000.
We take care of both the bands
and our listeners. We might
promote local indie bands, but we
also make sure that their stuff is of
good quality for our listenerseven if
it's just a home recording, as long as
it's of good quality, we'll play it.
It's far from the sex, drugs,
and rock 'n roll lifestyle people
imagine. If I were a famous musician,
maybe I can get away with it, but I'm
actually running a business here.
If you're passionate with rock,
then you'll continue to rock. I've
met a lot of great bands over the
years which didn't really make it, or
didn't have any money, but they still
kept on rocking because of their
passion for the music.
www.fhm.com.ph
P H OTO G R AP H Y: H E I D I PAS C UAL-AQ U E N D E ; I N TE R V I E W: TO N I ANTI PO R DA
I was amazed that nobody

owned the domain name
Rakista yet. Well, this was back
in 2007. So I took that opportunity,
developed the website, and that's
how our online music community
Rakista.com started.
UPGRADE
D E-G R I M E
E ASY
Dyson Fluffy DC47

If its a vacuum upgrade
youre looking for, then a
cordless make like this
one from Dyson, which
boasts of a digital motor
that spins at 120,000 rpm
(five times faster than
a formula 1 car engine)
shouldnt be too shabby.
The fluffys changeable
vacuum heads suck up
dirt, soft-dusts blinds, and
dirt brushes indoor grime.
No longer will you have
any need for walis.
Score for: P3 8,5 00,
Dyson Concept Store,
Rust ans, True Value
Year of
better gear
Start the year fresh with the latest
consumer electronics to fulfill
resolutions with
WORDS: KHYNE PALUMAR ASH MAHINAY
G ET N I C KE D
I N T H E FAC E
L E SS
WO R K M O R E
E F F I C I E N T LY
Western Digital
MyBook Pro
A thunderbolt drive
that fixes your storage
solution, which means
no more puny USB
sticks. With 6 to 10TB of
storage working at 7,200
RPM that cuts out the
time it takes to transfer
large videos, photos,
and audio files. Are you
a content professional/
media junkie or arent
you?
Score for: P3 1,4 9 0
(6TB), P4 0,4 9 0 (8TB),
P47,9 9 0 (10 TB)
Philips series 7000

SensoTouch wet & dry
electric shaver
Precision-cuts uneven
facial hair at a swipe of its
triple rotary blades, so you
wont have to manually
mow down fuzz. The
GyroFlex 2D contour tech
adjusts to slide on the
surface of your face. Tap
washable and charges an
hour for every 50-minute
of cordless use.
Score for: P6,8 9 9,
True Value, Philips
distributors
www.fhm.com.ph
E D I T YO U R
APPLIAN C ES
Dyson bladeless fan

Fans without blades look
disappointingly lesser
than their conventional
counterparts, and were
sorry to say this bladeless
release from Dyson is
a perfect example of
that: Its lighter, eats up
less energy, and you
barely know its working
because it produces 75
percent less noise. But
you get to pick from 10
airflow settings.
Score for: P19,9 00
(A M6), P2 9,5 00 (A M7),
Dyson Concept Store,
Rust ans, True Value
L E AV E T H E
WI R E S AT
HOM E
Lenovo VIBE P1
The folks over at
Lenovo think one of
your resolutions this
year should be freeing
yourself from power
banks and charger wires
for the whole daythats
why the standout feature
of their new VIBE P1
is a chunky 5,000mAh
battery. The P1 can even
charge up other phones
from its bountiful energy
reserves and get it all
back quickly with a 24W
quick-charge function.
Aside from ditching your
old phones battered
battery life, youd also
be swapping its scuffed
plastic for a fresh start
with the P1s sexy metaland-glass construction.
Try not to drop it during
the festivities!
Lenovo distributors
HOOK UP
YO U R W O R K
DESK
JBL Pebbles White

Give your inner ears a
break from buds and
listen to music from
a pair of Harmanengineered speakers set
in your slave pit. These
6 x 9 inch pebbles are
easy plug-and-plays that
sound off crisp sounds
and deep bass. And
while it isnt cordless, the
smart cable management
design should leave your
desk with one less clutter.
Time to work.
Score for: P2,5 9 9, J B L
I M P R OV E
YO U R
BA L A N C E
BONUS
N O NT E C H!
Hovertrax 2 wheel
self balance electric
scooter
Essentially a more
affordable Segway
without the balancing
handles, but officially, a
self-balancing scooter.
Letting you roll on
FI N ISH
W HATS O N
YO U R P L AT E
Fat Out
Because your insides can
now accommodate them
thanks to a synthesis of
psyllium husk, oat fiber,
green tea extract, etc
that gives your digestive
system a hand, edging
out toxins and bad
cholesterol. A capsule
every meal controls
appetite and speeds up
metabolism.
www.fhm.com.ph
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twitter.com/fhmphil
fhmphilofficial
LED-headlight blinged,
scratch-resistant shell
that sits on top of two
heavy alloy wheels for
two hours every charge.
Comes with built-in
Bluetooth speakers so
you can draw attention
to yourself while rolling
obnoxiously by. Best
ridden with a helmet.
Lazada
UPGRADE
We have
boost!
The new Ford Focus welcomes you to
life with forced induction
WORDS: ASH MAHINAY
For 2016,
the new Ford
Focus has
gotten an
update to one
of the nicer exteriors in
the compact category,
and more importantly,
theyve ripped its
previous powerplant
out and plopped an
eager 1.5 liter EcoBoost
in. The average Pinoy
driver has probably
never driven a sedan (or
in this case, hatch) with
a turbo heart before, so
heres our guide to living
with forced induction.
We arent going to
explain how it actually
works, but rather how
youll feel it with your
butt in the drivers seat.
HOW THIS AFFECTS

YOU
Say you need to overtake a
slow Sunday driver: you pull
out, accelerate, andwait a
bit for the car to catch up to
your intentions. With a turbo
car, you get more power
sooner, and the passing
move becomes less sketchy.
In general, its faster and
thats always good, duh.
THE TURBO CHARGER EFFECT

HORSEPOWER
TURBOS AND THE

POWER CURVE
Engines dont make power
in a totally linear fashion.
Mash the gasespecially
for smaller matipid
engines with 1.5 liter
displacementsand the car
will only really start to move
when it hits max torque
and horsepower; thats at
around 3000 RPM or more.
A turbos effect is flattening
out the power curve with
its boostthus giving you
more power whenever you
need it.
W/ TURBO CHARGER
MAX TORQUE
W/0 TURBO CHARGER
RPM
GAS
facebook.com/FHM.ph
twitter.com/fhmphil
fhmphilofficial
www.fhm.com.ph
WAIT, SO HOW IS IT ECONOMICAL?

Big honking engines, like the 5.0 in a Mustang for
example, have flatter power curves because of sheer
displacement, but they also carry a gas mileage penalty.
Whenever a turbo kicks in, it does use more fuel than
a non-blown enginebut since its not on all the time
either, you can still enjoy the frugality of that small
displacement motor when not getting on the gas. In this
case, the 180 PS and 240 Nm of torque from its 1.5
liter EcoBoost engine make it more powerful than an
equivalent naturally-aspirated 2.0.
DID WE MENTION IT CAN PARK ITSELF?
A self-driving car probably couldnt survive Manila traffic,
so Fords geeks have given the Focus self-parking
capabilities instead. The Enhanced Active Park Assist
lets you not just experience hands-off perpendicular and
parallel parking, but also Park-Out Assistbecause if its
robot brain can get you into a slot, then it sure as hell can
get you out of there. Come with me if you want to live.
Build it and they will come

Nissan Philippines does a little CSR to
drive some dreams to reality
P RI CE :
1.5L Focus
GTDI
EcoBoosvt
Sport+ AT
P1,278,000
The boys from Nissan have got a formula that, though

it might not directly translate to vehicle sales outright,
will fuel a future that will: help build houses for the
poor and boost their hopes that they can work to make
their lives better. Theyre doing this in partnership with
Habitat for Humanity, and so far four houses have
been built in barangay Payatas in Quezon city.
We believe in improving the lives of our fellow
Filipinos, more so for those coming from the lowincome sector, and we do this by helping them build
their dreamowning a home they can call their very
own, says NPI President and Managing Director,
Antonio Zara. This is our way of giving back to the
community, by upholding our brand promise of turning
what if into what is for those in need.
And if the new owners of the homes do succeed
in making their lives better, they will become the new
middle class, with education and money to spend.
Then they will buy a car. Brilliant.
TURBO CHARGER MAN
ILLUSTRATION: MICHAEL EDWARD ATIENZA
www.fhm.com.ph
facebook.com/FHM.ph
twitter.com/fhmphil
fhmphilofficial
UPGRADE
Your 2016
tech forecast
Fortunes change quickly in todays cutthroat world of tech.
One day youre cool like Vanilla Ice, the next day youre
an Internet meme, or um, Nokia. Will you get your
moneys worth in that next shiny purchase? Heres the
E V E RYD AY G E A R
IN Virtual Reality
Weve been promised a
future where we put on a
clunky headset to transport
ourselves to another world.
In 1992, Lawnmower Man
speak, we called it virtual
reality. Today, that promise
just might come true, thanks
to a Facebook company
called Oculus and their VR
headset, the Rift. All thats
left is for Oculus to sell
the thing to consumers,
which well see sometime
in early 2016. Sony, Valve
and Microsoft are also
in the virtual/augmented
reality game with their own
headsets, so get ready to
rumble!
OUT The Kitchen Sink
More and more tech is on its
way out. Youve got wireless
charging all set to kill your
bothersome phone charger.
Youve got mobile payment
services like Google Wallet
and Apple Pay poised to
kill plastic credit cards. And
Blackberry? They released
a new Android phone. Still
out, sorry.
411 on what will soon be uso and laos in tech so far
HANDHELDS
IN Mobile
Thought the iPhone wasnt a
thing anymore? Think again:
Apple sold 13 million units
of the iPhone 6S in its first
three days of sale, breaking
all kinds of records.
Everything is about mobile
phones nowadays, and the
entire tech world is moving
in that direction. Cloud
services are becoming
more popular. Apps are
multiplying like rabbits.
Websites are becoming
mobile-friendly.
OUT Tablets
Sure, Apple made an iPad
Pro this year, and good old
Microsoft has our attention
with its upcoming Surface
Pro 4, but make no mistake
about it, tablets are on the
way out. With smart phones
getting bigger and bigger,
consumers see little sense
in buying a phone and a
tablet when they basically
do the same thing.
WORDS:
VINCE SALES
ILLUSTRATIONS:
CARLO MAALA
W O R K A N D G A M I N G H A R D WA R E
IN Laptops with oomph
Youd think laptops would be
next on the chopping block,
but people still turn to them
to get some real work done.
Laptops will be interesting
in 2016 for one reason:
nerds have finally figured
out how to get a decent
video card to fit inside.
Gaming company Razer
did it first with their Blade
laptop. Then Microsoft
showed everyone how to do
it with the Surface Book.
OUT Gaming consoles

Soon your laptop could have
as much video processing
power as your PS4 and
Xbox One. Gaming consoles
still have some life in them,
but experts say this could
be the last generation of
boxes known as gaming
consoles. In the future, youll
be buying a service. Or
playing on your phone. The
Wii U? Sorry, thats been out
since day one.
facebook.com/FHM.ph
twitter.com/fhmphil
fhmphilofficial
www.fhm.com.ph
C O M M O D ITI E S
IN The Sharing Economy
Uber, the ride-sharing app,
has been so successful its
poised to change chunks
of the worldwide economy.
Now everyone is looking
for what else they can give
the Uber treatment. Would
it work for yaya services
(Yuber)? How about for
plumbers (tUber-o)? And
theres already an Uber for
house rental/hotel rooms
its called Airbnb. Geeks call
it 'The Sharing Economy,'
and its set to disrupt and
change everything.
OUT Owning Stuff

Oh, the kids of today. They
have zero interest in owning
a Laser Disc copy of The
Karate Kid, or the BluRay Coppola remaster of
The Godfather. But it goes
further than that. Millennials
have been reported to often
forego buying a house or a
car. Why buy a car when you
can Uber? Why buy a house
when you can rent and
travel the world? Why buy
a vacation home when you
can Airbnb?
V I S U A L E NTE RTA I N M E NT
IN Streaming
It seems only yesterday
when CDs and DVDs were
on the way out, and music
download services like
iTunes were hot property.
Now downloads are on
the way out and streaming
services are in. Spotify rules
the roost, but youve got
plenty of alternatives, like
Apple Music and Amazon.
Even YouTube is beefing up
its streaming with an adfree service called YouTube
Red. And the streaming
doesnt stop with music.
You can stream movies, TV
shows, pornography, and
even video games. Did we
mention pornography?
of how to get computers

into your watch, shoes,
glasses and underwear. Hey,
at least someone is trying to
get into your underwear.
OUT Cable TV
With everyone streaming
music and TV on their
phones, who has the
patience to wait for a show
on cable? With Netflix,
and local alternative iFlix,
cutting your expensive
cable connection looks
pretty darn attractive. And
its not just the distribution
of shows via streaming
that's changing. Netflix has
begun to produce its own
content (Daredevil is one
of the more successful
shows) and there are no
signs they're stopping. That
could make Netflix the next
HBO (maker of medieval
violence porn show, Game
of Thrones). Plus, cable TV
never really caught on in the
Philippines, so wawa naman
them.
www.fhm.com.ph
WEAR AB LE TE C H
IN Wearable Tech
Wearable tech promises a
gleaming future where you
can waltz into a store, grab
something, and buy it with
a wave of your wrist. Aside
from being a marketers
dream, wearable tech lets
your gizmos know what
youre doing, zero in on
where you are, as well as
figure out wacky things
like how healthy you are,
or if you need a hug. Tech
companies everywhere are
trying to crack the problem
facebook.com/FHM.ph
twitter.com/fhmphil
fhmphilofficial
OUT Wearable Tech

How can wearable tech
both be in and out at
the same time? Simple:
Everyone wants to make
it, but no one is buying it.
Sure, theres your buddy
who swears by his Fitbit.
And Apple Watch sales have
been successful enough
to warrant an update to
the device, but right now
wearable tech looks very
much like an expensive
experiment. Apple has
been uncharacteristically
secretive about actual
Apple Watch sales numbers.
And everyone knows what
happened to Google Glass
it went the way of the
Segway. Were making a
prediction: despite everyone
jumping on the wearable
tech bandwagon, it will soon
be out, like hairspray and
shoulder pads.
True Stories
It was a Friday night. After an exhausting
work week without a single good nights sleep,
my officemates and I decided to let it rip in a
videoke bar. After some singing and drinking,
the alcohol finally started to kick in. I must
admit that I turn into quite the dancer when Ive
had a drink or two. My officemates dared me to
do a cartwheel. I failed and all the alcohol went
straight to my head and then things started to
get blurry. After karaoke, we decided to go to my
officemates place. I started vomiting everywhere:
in the taxi, on the street lamp by the corner, on
the road, until we reached our friends house. I
collapsed right then and there, but during the
night I would wake people up just to vomit. The
last thing I remember was dragging myself in
the toilet and falling asleep below the sink right
beside the toilet bowl. My friends didnt forget
to commemorate the moment by taking photo of
me sleeping. They made it a meme and shared it
with the officemates who werent there. Such nice
friends I have.
Engell, via Facebook
Hot n cold
A few years back, we

had a school camping
trip with our graduating
batch. The plan was to

build lasting memories
with the people weve
known for so long before
we went our separate

ways. I was in an all-boys
school so as you would
expect, we were quite the
rowdy bunch, especially
when it came to pranking
one another. One time,
my classmates and I
were goofing around
in the bathroom, and I
was waiting for my turn
to use the shower. My
friend Sam told me I
could use the cubicle he
was in. I went inside and
turned on the water, and
I kid you not, the first
drop of water made me
scream like I was getting
murdered. Apparently,
the heater only had two
settingsNarnia-cold or
Mordor-hot. After I got
out of the bathroom, I
saw Sam, laughing it up
like a hyena on crack. Ill
tell you guys how I got
back at jackass in my
next entry!
Prodo, via Facebook
TRUE
STORY
Sohow does it
taste?
My cousin and I were

making some crazy
concoctions with our
new blender. We were
blending some really
weird stuff like ice cream,
chocolate, Tabasco sauce,
oranges, bread, and some
other stuff. We were busy
just looking for things
to put insidetesting if
it really was one of the
most powerful blenders
in the market! We were
about to let it rip, when
I thought it would be
awesome to put some
nutmeg in there to add
to the earthy texture of
the drink, but my cousin
pushed the button while
I was taking off the lid.
Long story short: the
concoction splattered all
over my face.
JuzyJuiz, via Facebook
Just like ukay
I just finished my workout
Jhane
Santaguiel
Once during a show, I
was dancing on stage
and my leggings suddenly
ripped open because
of a move I did. Luckily
only a few people in
the audience saw what
happened, but the staff
backstage saw everything
and were laughing it
up. I ran backstage
during song transitions!
I couldnt change my
leggings because there
was no breaks in-between
those songs so they duct
taped the hole in my
leggings and I got back
on stage, and just kept
dancing, ha ha!
at my gym. I tossed my
workout clothes into the
gym laundry basket
where you usually pitch
the gym clothes you
borrow from the front
desk. I got dressed and
was driving off to work
when I realized that I
didnt borrow my gym
clothes that day and
instead wore my own and
that I had left my wallet
inside my shorts. I went
back to the locker room
and waited for the people
to get out before I started
rummaging through the
stinky gym clothes to find
my own. I was making a
mess tossing out used
clothes when some gym
people walked in on me
checking out the used
gym clothes. I found
my walletbut not after
being red in the face
and embarrassed by the
looks the guys at the
gym gave me.
Punani, via Facebook
facebook.com/FHM.ph
twitter.com/fhmphil
fhmphilofficial
www.fhm.com.ph
I L L U S T R AT I O N : G I L B E R T D A R O Y ; J H A N E S P H O T O : J E R I C O M O N T E M AY O R
Memed
You
are the
punchline

FHM Philippines - January 2016

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JAN UARY 2016 www.fhm.com.

THE NO. 1 MAGAZINE IN

18 + Con t e n t s A R e no t sui tA bl e f oR minoRs

getting better each time

60 DUDE FROM THE

64 CLOWNS FROM THE

Youll probably spend more

Trust us, heres the landian

We deal with deathor how

Learn the feral ways of

20 NEW YEAR FIX

How to: clean up postfireworks mess; stretch a

23 BAR ROOM JOKES

Intimate stories you want

30 READS FOR GOOD

100 HEALTHY EATS

104 HOW I DID IT

106 HOT METAL

The new Ford Focuss turbo

T H E TEAM: WHAT FHM ers HAVE BEEN U P TO T HI S M ON T H

December cover girl Kim Domingo

BAs brood with Tito Bitoy! Okay,

Top Gear vs FHM 2 : Beer

Publisher Aeus enjoys the

ins tagR am@

Pa-autograph naman, Kim!

and Mayumi Yokoyama, so I do hope the two

Good evening! Share ko

P.S. Special shoutout to Jean Saturnino!

YOUR NAMES RHYME! #JenKen

Supportive wife here! My husband Ken Gementiza is a

Ive been a fan since 2004

Just want to share how

WHO THE HELL

FEED YOUR MIND

Ive been collecting your

I want to greet my girlfriend

Good looks? I dont seem

This photo was taken last

Vibrating O-ring for

Condoms with raised

PREMIERE NICE & TIGHT

Condoms with a special

PREMIERE ULTRA THIN

Were not into hyperbole

What are your New Years

big parties or a more intimate

CY Ortega working out with his fellow

Erwan Heussaff, Chris Tiu, and Freego VP

FIND OUT HOW FREEGO

CY Ortega is in the best shape

WE WERE ONLY ALLOWED

was. It was very difficult to tolerate, and

If youre not dead

SOLUTION: Now that

hindi ka ma-constipate. Also, avoid

You werent able to

SOLUTION: Dude, youve

You h ave a ha ng ove r

You get the runs

to food that wont irritate your stomach.

ILLUSTRATION: MIKKE GALLARDO

Bar room jokes

Well that socked