Philip Bachman

UWRT 1102
DAlessio
3/17/2016
Final Essay
Feminism is a huge issue in todays society and it takes many forms. The topic I chose to
pursue and research more about is prostitution in Thailand. We may not think about it, but
prostitution is a huge part of Thailand and its economy. The main argument discussed is whether
or not it should be legalized or not. Through various genres such as films, literature and news
articles I hope to show how it influences society in a larger context.
I have learned a lot about prostitution since beginning this project. My research has
shown me that Thailand prostitution is very different from the rest of the world. often forces
women and children into prostitution for various different reasons. In the YouTube documentary
Thailand Documentary Darker Side of Bangkok, it expresses how prostitution is illegal in
Thailand. Although technically illegal it is openly practiced throughout the country and
regulated by the government because it makes them billions in tourism dollars. I have also
learned that many of the women currently in prostitution were forced into the life by their own
family. An article from the Chicago Tribune titled Prostitution is their only escape tells the
story of a young girl who is only thirteen years old and was sold into prostitution by her father
because he was very much in debt and her mother was very sick. The book Kamkaew also shares
a similar story of a young girl forced into prostitution because her family could not make ends
meet.

The rhetoric affects your understanding of the topic in several ways. The rhetor of most
of these stories are the women themselves sharing their own personal experiences. Having these
women share their stories creates a much deeper meaning and a stronger message. In the
documentary Whores Glory the prostitutes from all over the world share their experiences, but
they also share their needs, troubles, and hopes for a better life. The rhetoric affects the purpose
and message of the writing. Often the message is to bring light to their situation and try to make
a change to stop prostitution.
These documentaries and articles give me a glimpse into the perspective of these
prostitutes and what they have to endure. In addition to this, it can also help these women and
women who in the future may be forced into prostitution. Documentaries and news articles are
great genres to use to raise awareness and inform people about what these prostitutes are
experiencing in Thailand.
The only thing I view as a positive representation of prostitution is how much money it
makes for Thailands economy. It is estimated that 10 percent of Thailands gross domestic
product comes from money earned from prostitution. In addition, over 300 million dollars
earned each year by the sex workers is sent back to their families to support them. As a business
major, I can somewhat relate to as to why they have not simply put a stop to prostitution. A
business that generates over 6.4 billion dollars annually is simply not stopped especially when
the local people view it as something that has always been and will always be (havocscope 1).

Comments:
-I think throughout your paper you should try to give more insight about your personal thoughts
about your topic
-When you write your next draft, make sure to include your research on topics within the
prostitution. You included the genres that you need which is good, but you need the research as
well. Also, it was kinda dry with that you didnt include any of your own opinion, you only
stated what you learned from reading or listening to something. You can keep what you learned
in your paper, but add how it made you feel when you read it and your thoughts on each topic
(including the research part).
Alicias comments: I think you have a good idea as far as the research you are aiming to use.
Overall you need to find a structure of how you want to portray your message. I think you should
go over the guidelines in our inquiry project packet and use that to help you break down both
your opinions and actual facts. So far this is very opinionated and repetitive but no need to stress
because you going to do awesome! Minimal errors and you did stay on topic. Also it does like
you are using a lot of research findings one after the other. Try to put in some I statements and
personal experiences and take-aways
-maybe add a little more of your own opinion on what the govt should do, and make sure to add
your workscited page, I aslo think you should go into a little more depth about the rhetoric.
Maybe talk about their language
- a lot of good information used! Its a good start, Id just recommend fleshing it out a bit more,
maybe with a few more quotes, as well as your own opinion on the practice as well as the
sources youve used. Were they effective, persuasive, etc. good base!

- You have some very good research so far. I would say to make sure you include your own
thoughts on the topic and expand on your research and genres.