Jordan Schnakenberg

Schnakenberg 1

Prof. Melton
ENGL. 5
2/19/16
Essay#1
Weve all been there: you walk into class, arrogantly thinking Im going to get an A on
this test. You have all the notes that the teacher allows you to bring and youre ready, or at least
you think so. You finish with time to spare and you hand your teacher the test with a smile
thinking you did great. Only to find out that the A that you thought would be at the top of your
paper, is actually a D. This was me last semester in my Intro to Western Civilizations class and
this essay will explain how I went wrong and how I have improved since then in my writings by
using the feedback that I was given.
The assignment was a 50 minute timed in class essay. At the beginning of the semester
we were given a list of four possible essay prompts that would be on the midterm. Of those four
she would pick two for us to choose from, so you had to be prepared for three out of the four so
that at least one of your studied for prompts would be a choice. Since we had the prompts to
study from the first day of class, naturally I waited until the last week before even reading the
questions. We were also allowed to bring one, front and back, page of notes, of which I only used
a page and a half. The information that had to be included needed to be from the lectures, text
book, and other course readings that I didnt read. I thought that I could make the essay work
with only lecture information and text book citations, however I thought wrong. Linda Flower
was all to correct when she stated that The ability to adapt your knowledge to the needs of the

reader is often crucial to your success as a writer. (196). I did not meet the needs of my reader
when I did not use citations from our reading material.
As my planning of the essay left a lot to be desired, the execution was also lacking. I
finished writing with probably ten minutes to spare which could have been used for revisions or
at the very least a final read through. But as Donald M. Murray wrote, When students complete
a first draft, they consider the job of writing done (56). This was one hundred percent of the
mindset that I had when I finished. But being that my final grade was a sixty-nine percent, one
last read for grammar checking purposes could have given me that one extra point to have at
least a passing grade. It was from that point on that I re-read every paper before turning it in, just
in case that one missing word gets put in or that delicate word gets erased that could mean the
difference between pass or fail.
According to Ann Lamot, from a shitty first draft is how people end up with good
second drafts, and terrific third drafts (21). And the draft that I turned in as my midterm exam
fits the criteria to be a shitty first draft according to Lamot. I believe that besides proofreading
after I was finished; I also could have put a lot more time into the preparation beforehand. I
should have started putting together my notes sheet at least two weeks earlier and kept adding to
it every day to ensure that every idea that I had got added to the notes as opposed to writing it at
ten oclock the night before and adding extras with pen before class.
Though I thought I was going to get a really good grade on this assignment from my
history class, my hopes where quickly destroyed when I saw that I had gotten a D on the paper.
And although this was a terrible feeling, it was probably good that things worked out the way
that they did. This is because through the feedback that I got on this essay, I was able to use the
comments to make the class final, which was the same task, a well worded and well prepared

work of art. I learned that you have to listen to what the teacher expects and put every necessary
piece in there because if you dont, you will be unhappy with the grade. My mistakes are that I
didnt use class reading citations, I didnt prepare enough or give myself enough time to prepare,
and if the class requires reading then I actually have to read. After this experience I have worked
on all of these things for the remainder of my essays so far and will continue to do so for the rest
of my college career.