30/03/2011 18:21
psychologytoday.com
The Ultimate Guide to
Recommendations
It doesn’t matter whether you’re applying for a job
as a babysitter or a CEO. At some point in your life,
you will need someone to express support for your
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credentials. As a letter writer, whether you’re trying
to help a colleague or an employee achieve a desired
goal, you will be in the position of holding that per-
son’s future in your hands with the quality of your
letter.
I
n the past two blog postings of mine, I’ve covered
key topics related to the application process-- in-
terviews and personal statements. This posting
addresses that crucial third component to job hun-
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ting success.  I’ll show you how to use psychology
to ensure that your letters provide that final push
you need to get the position you seek, whatever
it is.  I’m combining advice for «requesters») «re-
Printed with
commenders», but each can benefit.   Requesters
will learn how to ask more effectively for letters of
support and recommenders will learn how to write
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201101/the-ultimate-guide-recommendations
more effectively.  I’d also advise recommenders to
share this blog with your students, employees, or
advisees to help them get an inside track on the jobs
and positions they most desire. This will also make
your life much easier, as you will shortly find out.
Advice for requestors:
We’ll use the common scenario in which a student or
job hunter is applying for multiple positions. Many
people applying for jobs, promotions, internship po-
sitions, or university admission apply to more than
one at a time. For a competitive position you might
apply to as many as 12 different places. However,
even if you’re only applying for one position, the
same rules are in order.
The most important issue for you to consider is to
decide who to ask for a recommendation.  Are you
better off with a higher-up person whose name is
more widely known but who doesn’t know you?
Or would your letter be stronger if it came from
a lowlier source who knows you extremely well?
One approach is to have the lower-ranking person
actually write the letter which the higher-up per-
son then signs. The problem with this approach is
that it can be construed as unethical. The famous
person doesn’t know you at all but is giving the im-
pression to the reader that he or she has observed
your actions on a daily basis and can vouch for your
terrific qualities. A way around this dilemma is to
have the higher-up person author the letter and in
the body of the letter, state that he or she is relying
on the lower-ranking person’s say-so. In this case,
though, you would be well advised to make an ap-
pointment with the big shot so that you have made
some actual, direct contact.  This strategy is actually
an excellent one from a psychological point of view.
By making this personal contact with the big boss,
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psychologytoday.com
The Ultimate Guide to Recommendations
you might wander into some new and unexpected
opportunities for advancement.
You might wonder here about timing. If you finish
one job or school position and don’t need a letter
right away, but will in the future, when should you
ask for it? My advice is simple-find out what your
recommender prefers. I personally think generic let-
ters of recommendation that don’t address a specific
position aren’t all that good, so I suggest that people
wait and ask when they need the actual letter. In
the meantime, stay in touch with your recommen-
der and don’t just contact him or her solely for the
purposes of getting the letter.  That way, the person
is sure to remember you!
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Alright, you’ve got your recommender(s) lined up.
Time to pop the question. Make the request in a
straightforward, simple, clear, and organized man-
ner.  Put it all together at one time. Don’t ask for a
letter for one position on Tuesday and another let-
ter for a different position on Friday.  Don’t ask for
a letter and then announce a couple of weeks later
that you changed your mind and no longer want to
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apply for that position and now need a completely
different one. If you know that you are applying for
several positions, wait until you have all the relevant
forms and info to distribute.
Printed with
When you make the actual request, ask if the recom-
mender feels comfortable writing you a good (i.e.
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201101/the-ultimate-guide-recommendations
30/03/2011 18:21
positive) letter for the position.  Your closeness to
the recommender will determine how you actually
word the request.  If you get a «no» or sense some
reluctance, you might want to reconsider whether
you should ask this person to complete the recom-
mendation.
Let’s hope the answer was an enthusiastic «yes!»
Put together in an easily accessible manner all of the
documents that you submitted for your application
and give these to your recommender. Find out if your
recommender prefers to see these as hard copy or
as e-files and then send them in the preferred man-
ner. These documents should include, as necessary,
your own personal statement, your resume, and
your transcript (if required). They should be the
exact documents you submit in your application. 
I also advise you to indicate, either in your request
or as a separate document, the exact nature of your
relationship with the recommender. Professors and
employers won’t have in their heads the dates of
your work together, but they are usually asked to
provide this info in their recommendation. Don’t
make these people have to guess or consult their
records.  Again, from a psychological point of view,
your attention to these details will show that you
actually are organized, attentive to detail, and have
all the other positive qualities about yourself that
you want the recommender to verify. It’s great im-
pression management to be organized when you’re
asking for something important from a boss.
With regard to the actual forms themselves, some
positions require letters only; others involve com-
plex documents with multiple parts which are either
online or paper.  If hard copy letters are involved,
provide a list of all people to whom the letters should
be addressed.  Give the recommender stamped, ad-
dressed envelopes and put the return address of
the recommender on the envelopes.  Make sure
that everything you’ve obtained is up-to-date and
accurate.
Here’s another common question: Do recommen-
ders resent being asked for multiple letters from
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psychologytoday.com

The Ultimate Guide to Recommendations

one person? The answer is no, they do not. Most

recommenders don’t mind adapting the basic letter
they’ve written to the specific purpose.  However,
make sure that you remind the recommender to
proofread the letter before sending it off.  A letter
that says you’d be a great employee at Gotham City
Bank would not go over very well if read by an em-
ployer seeking to fill a position at Metropolitan Bank.

If forms are required in hard copy, put them neatly

in order in a folder along with their envelopes. You
can get creative with the way you organize these
by color coding or using attractive notebooks or
file folders. For online requests, you won’t have to
do this. But if there is a mix of online and hard
copies, then you have to include the online form
descriptions in this little portfolio you prepare for
your recommender. Psychologically, this step is
important because you are reducing the cognitive
load on your recommender. People trying to help
you in your career are probably busy, and will ap-
preciate this courtesy. They’ll also be less likely to
make mistakes.

Occasionally, recommendations are requested over

the telephone. There are sometimes issues of confi-
dentiality in phone or email requests. You need to
assure your recommender, in written form , that
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you waive your right to see or find out about this

communication.


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