Title: Things You Shouldn't Do With Your Best Friend's Older Sister Pairing: Merlin/Morgana Rating: NC-17 Warnings:

Awkward, sweaty smut. Summary: Modern-day AU - Merlin certainly didn't mean to lose his virginity to his best friend's older sister. It just kind of... happens. A/N: Written for merlin_rarepair 's AU challenge. This is the first three quarters of it - the conclusion is under construction, but don't worry, it's NEARLY done.
Things You Shouldn't Do With Your Best Friend's Older Sister

Its not that Merlin meant to lose his virginity to his best friends older sister. It just kind of happened on its own.

To this day, in fact, he has no idea how it came about.

He knows that, his second week of uni, when Arthur invited him back to his fathers mansion to play video games, Morgana was there, eating sushi in the kitchen, when they came in to find sustenance to keep them going through Halo II. Somehow managing to make glasses, bare feet, a mans shirt and jogging bottoms look sexy, shed cast him an evaluating stare as Arthur had waved a hand Merlin, Morgana Morgana, Merlin and Merlin had had the distinct impression she was eyeing him up like a cat eyes up a fresh saucer of cream.

He hadnt been sure whether to be flattered or terrified.

Not that shed even said anything to him at the time.

A week later shed been in tight jeans and a polo-neck, fixing her hair in a hall mirror as he and Arthur headed past her and out the door.

You look fine, Morgana, Arthur had rolled his eyes, Christ.

Morgana had ignored them, and Merlin had been temporarily transfixed by her legs before being forced to look away so that he didnt trip and break his neck on the stairs.

It continued on like that for a few weeks. Merlin came round to play video games with Arthur and Morgana might or might not be there. Once or twice he encountered her on his own if Arthur sent him off to the kitchen for beer, or if he went to the toilet. He might spot Morgana through an open door, or she might be in the kitchen on her own, sometimes cooking sometimes at the table with her laptop.

Here, taste, shed dipped a wooden spoon into something on the stove and thrust it in front of his face hed obediently
opened his mouth. Any good?

Um Merlin floundered he had no expertise when it came to evaluating the quality of Bolognese sauce, really. Yeah
um yeah, great, fine.

Good, shed gone back to stirring, dismissing him with the regal wave of one hand.

Merlin had stared at her for a minute longer then scurried away.

But he doesnt understand, really, how they went from such brief scraps of interaction to her letting him one afternoon when hes arrived half an hour earlier than planned, telling him Arthur isnt back from rugby practice yet, and taking him up to her room.

He lets her because he doesnt know of any reason why he should object to being taken up to a girls room even if he hardly knows the girl in question.

Hes never seen Morganas bedroom before. Blue walls sanded floorboards big, four-poster bed; oak writing desk with a laptop and stacks of paper; a wardrobe that looks like he could lie down inside without issue. No posters on the walls but a few framed photos frozen faces in black a white people who look like her, and people who dont. A dream catcher in the window and another hanging from the light fitting.

She closes the door behind them then kisses him mouth soft and wet.

He doesnt know how to respond to that, so he just blinks at her, stupidly, until she grins, still close enough for her eyelashes to be grazing his cheek. Then she begins to unbutton her blouse and Merlins mind crashes back into touch with his body enough that he manages to beg an explanation for what is clearly a case of temporary insanity on her part.

Dont you want to? She asks, as she peels the blouse of her smooth, milky shoulders.

What? No I mean yes I mean he stutters, stumbles, feels his tongue turning to led in his dry mouth.

She laughs, pushing him until the backs of his knees come into contact with the edge of her bed and he sits down before he can collapse she straddles his legs. So be quiet, then.

But Arthur He manages, between her mouth and her hands tugging up his t-shirt and oh, god, is this actually
happening?

Weve got time, she promises, against the plain of his neck. Relax, Merlin.

Easy for you to say, he mumbles and she laughs.

It took him six months to get this far with the last girl he was with and he never got past her bra. Suddenly a girl hes known four weeks and had three monosyllabic conversations with is undressing him?

Apparently yes because shes got his belt off and has pressed her hand against where he is already embarrassingly hard.

Should he tell her hes never had sex before? Is that important? It might be. Its not like he has any idea what hes doing porn is the only thing he has to go by for a guide as to what to do in situations like this and this isnt like the movies. What if shes expecting something amazing?

She drags him up the bed, pulls him down on top of her and kisses him and kisses him pushes his jeans down and holds onto him through his boxers grin bright and impish.

Morgana, Ive never Merlin swallows, blinks, Ive never before with

Morgana pauses, propping herself up on her elbows, really?

Merlin nods, his cheeks flushing. I dont know whether if maybe you dont want to

What? No oh, Merlin, its fine, she giggles, its fine, honestly.

Its just I Merlin says, I dont really know what Im meant to be um, doing really.

Morganas grin is wicked but welcoming. She wraps her arms around his shoulders and presses her mouth against his ear. Then Ill just have to teach you, wont I?

The last of their clothes come off without much further hesitation and Merlin shakes and thinks oh god those are Morganas breasts and hides his face in her neck because hes half expecting a slap for looking. She pushes him off a few moments later and fishes in the drawer of her bedside table retrieves a box of condoms. You know how to

Oh right yeah, he nods, sitting up, praying to God that he actually does know how to put one on, because its been like
three years since they had this lesson in sex ed. at school and and

Pinch the end, roll down

Despite his shaking hands he manages it, feels a small flush of triumph Morgana is grinning at him again.

Now, she lies back against the pillows and holds out an arm, you come here and we can just

He does, and she kisses him, combing her fingers through his hair and reaching down with her free hand to press his cock up against where she is warm and slick and open.

Just push, a little, she advises, quietly, and he does thinking oh god, oh god, oh god it feels like like just this
wet, sort of soft and not as tight as they talk about in pornos but but still close and really, really good and

Okay so, after this bit he has some idea as to what to do because it doesnt really take a genius to know how to move in and out a bit he hesitates a moment to make sure and Morgana puts a hand on his hip and murmurs go on, then, into his ear so he blushes and does it.

She lets out a warm breath and closes her eyes. There, she sounds like she would purr if she could, thats not too bad, is it?

N-no, he stammers back, trying desperately to keep his voice from rising to a squeak. She keeps lifting her hips a little to
meet him and that that feels amazing.

The rest of it is mostly silent but for the occasional sharply hitched in breath or Merlin trying not to moan into her shoulder. The bed creaks a little and somewhere outside a dog barks. There is a sort of wet sound and the shuffle of the sheets beneath them.

After maybe a minute or so Morgana says There there! And then Merlin cant hold himself back anymore and he comes, gasping and shuddering and losing all sensation in his hands and feet as for a moment, the world goes brilliant gold.

Hes left in a breathless, sweaty heap on Morganas duvet as she gently pushes him off her and he cant really find it in himself to move into a more dignified position.

Alright? Morgana asks him, after a moment.

Um Merlin doesnt open his eyes, yeah um

Good, she sounds pleased and a moment later he feels her hand on his shoulder, giving him a quick, affectionate pat.

God, he feels like a well-behaved puppy

Carefully, tentatively, Merlin unfolds himself opens his eyes sits up runs a hand through his hair. He realises he still has the condom on, and that its leaking now that hes gone soft again embarrassed, he slips it off hides it in the palm of one hand.

Morgana is reclining against her pillows still, pushing thick dark hair out of her eyes. He finds it hard to look at her naked.

Can I ask you something?

Mm? Sure, she waves a hand.

Um he blinks at her, how how come youve got a different accent from Arthur and your dad?

She snorts, then shrugs. Uthers my godfather. He adopted me when I was twelve my parents died she waves a hand, boating accident. I worked hard to keep my accent didnt feel like I wanted to lose anything else, you know?

Yeah, yeah, Merlin looks down, a little appalled for her. Arthur has never said anything about Morgana being adopted
Merlin always just supposed that they had grown up in different places Morgana with their presumably Irish mother; Arthur with their English father.

Well that would be my tragic back story, Morgana smiles, dryly, whats yours?

Oh Merlin shrugs, horribly aware of how naked they both still are, I dont really have one. Dad left when I was
little. Lived with my mum till I got into university now my uncle puts me up during term time. He stops, takes a breath. Why did you want to he waves a hand, as if to encompass the room, themselves and everything that they have just done.

Morgana sits up, and edges over to him on the bed. I thought youd be interesting. And you were. She leans closer and

kisses the place where his shoulder sweeps up into his neck.

He doesnt have the guts to kiss her back just turns his head to touch his nose to her hair line for a moment. The air is starting to get cold on his skin. One of his legs is itching.

The crash and thud from downstairs makes them both jump.

Arthurs back, Morgana tells him, unnecessarily. Go on get dressed.

He doesnt look at her whilst he dresses fumbling because hes still holding the condom and scurries away without saying anything. He flushes the condom down the loo in the bathroom down the hall, then sits on the edge of the bath with the door locked, looking at hard white floor tiles and thinking about her kissing his neck.

There is no expectation, on Merlins part, that it will happen again. He has the impression that Morgana had seen him as a temporary amusement no reason to suppose that she will have any thought of repeating the performance, particularly given that Merlin suspects it was less than spectacular for her. She hadnt cum, or anything, he doesnt think in fact hed done pitifully little for her throughout the entire event. Stupid, really. He should have thought.

Except that it turns out that thought is difficult to accomplish when a beautiful woman has just made it clear that she wants to have sex with you.

Still, the bottom line is that it wont happen again. And also that he cant tell anyone about it, which is annoying. Arthur has been mocking him for being a virgin since he found out that Merlin was one now hes finally not anymore, and he cant tell Arthur and shut him up, because Arthur will demand to know who the girl was and then beat the snot out of him.

For a few days, the incident remains at the forefront of his mind, confusing and uncertain. It leaves Merlin with an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach as he turns over the details late at night and early in the morning. But by the end of the week it has faded a little in significance swept to the back of his head by more pressing things like essay deadlines and tutorial research. It has happened and now he must move on.

Then, in the middle of the following week, Arthur is held up meeting Merlin at the Pendragon estate, and Morgana is there in the kitchen, reading a book of Sylvia Plath poems. She is wearing the same pair of glasses she was the first time they met, and when smiles at him he starts to feel dizzy.

She asks if he wants to come up to her room, and he does, but he struggles to say it for a moment, thinking about everything about how stupid this is about the likelihood of getting caught about how he should have done some research between times so hed have more of a clue what hes meant to do the second time around.

Thankfully, Morgana takes his hand and leads him up the stairs without waiting for him to agree to come with her, and starts to kiss him as soon as the door is closed.

He has to suppose that this time is a bit better than last time. He lasts a bit longer, and his hands dont shake (quite as much), and Morgana makes more noise. They both do, actually. This time is a bit more frantic, really. Hasty and fierce. Morgana tugs his hair and scratches his back and kicks against the sheets. When he cums, she kisses him, hard pushes him over onto his back and pins him to the bed he feels as if she is claiming him.

This time, she collapses over him, and they are both left to gasp into the stilling air.

Then she tumbles off him and lies on her back, rubbing her eyes and gazing at the canopy over her bed.

Do you Merlin manages, after a moment, want to go out for um coffee sometime or something?

Morgana snorts, inelegantly, and rolls onto her stomach. Im not going to date you, Merlin.

Oh, Merlin is not entirely sure how to take that, okay.

Morgana turns an apologetic smile on him from the pillows, its not personal. I just dont feel the need for conversation, alright? I prefer sex. Which youre getting better at, by the way.

Merlins ears turn crimson. Okay, he mumbles.

She leans over and kisses his neck his jaw which he likes. Then she tells him to get dressed, because Arthur will be back soon. So he wriggles back into his clothes (hides the used condom in the palm of his hand again), feeling like a caterpillar clumsily cocooning himself its unnerving that she watches him.

He pauses as he reaches her door. Shes slipped a shirt on over her head and is sitting up, rearranging her pillows.

Are we he blinks, struggles cant really find the words for what he wants to ask her, what are we doing?

She only tosses her head, smile coy and soft. Turn up early more often and well find out.

The next time Arthur invites him round, Merlin arrives an hour ahead of when hes meant to. Morgana answers the door (its the butlers day off), in a denim miniskirt and carpet slippers, hair loose about her shoulders. There is a pause as he stands on the step and they regard each other, and for one sickening moment Merlin thinks that perhaps hes got this wrong that she doesnt want him here but then her lips twitch up, into the ghost of a smirk, and she slips cool fingers through his and leads him inside.

This time is definitely better Morgana moves his hands to where she wants them to be and she doesnt close her eyes while hes inside her. He gets up to courage to mouth his way down her breasts and she doesnt shove him off (actually kind of seems to like it).

He has no idea what hes doing to please her, but he thinks that he must be doing something she enjoys for this to be the third time in as many weeks.

Afterwards, with still a good half an hour to kill before Arthur is likely to turn up, they lie side by side on top of her bed covers, bathed in their own heat. The used condom is leaking into Merlins hand; his head is buzzing, faintly.

Its ten years since my parents died, Morganas voice abruptly breaks the silence. Ten years today.

Oh, Merlin has no idea what to say to that. Im sorry.

Morgana nods, shortly, not looking at him. Merlin has time to contemplate her profile the proud arch of her nose and the stubborn set of her jaw. Her breasts, and the salmon-pink nipples and the sweat still soft on her flesh. Her brow has knitted

she looks upset.

Tentatively, he reaches across to brush the inside of her arm with his finger tips. She casts him a quick, unreadable glance, and then, abruptly, rolls onto her side and folds herself about him like a sheet, one arm draped over his chest, one leg pressed between his own. Merlin lays a hand between her shoulder blades, and finds himself absently toying with her hair. She doesnt seem to mind.

She says a moment later we used to blow bubbles, on the roof of our house, late at night. My dad and me, I mean. It was just this daft thing I mean, it wouldnt really have been late at night, I dont think it just felt late because it was dark and I was little. Thats the last thing we did, before they were killed. Thats the last thing I remember. How stupid is that?

Merlin doesnt know what to tell her, and for a moment, he thinks shes crying but shes only take a deep breath, and then huddling closer to him.

Later that day, he decides he needs to find out how to make a girl cum. The fact is, he doesnt think Morgana has (hes sure he would notice) and he kind of wants to see if he can. Plus, youre meant to, arent you? Youre meant to get the girl to cum youre not much good if you cant

He has no idea where to start, though. Porn is not in the least bit helpful when it comes to real life situations (and hes pretty sure hed just feel stupid doing half of what they do in porn anyway). He knows Arthur would probably be able to advise him, but Arthur can never know about the fact that hes sleeping with Morgana, so thats not an option. Beyond that, he has three choices: his uncle Gaius (no), his mother (good god no), and Gwen, who works in his favourite coffee shop and sometimes gives him free lattes because hes always polite to her.

He met Gwen his first day in the city, actually the week before Freshers, when he moved in with his uncle. Shes nice and funny and pretty which had been enough to unbalance him a bit around her at first, but theyre good mates these days. Still, itll be a bit awkward, asking her for sex tips. Gwen is the kind of person who dispenses tea and sympathy not advice about how to get a girl off.

She doesnt like Arthur, either doesnt like the way he treats Merlin (or anyone, for that matter). Theyve met a few times, and every time Gwen has got that look about her like shes just remembered shes left her front door open or desperately needs to return an overdue library book. Merlin isnt sure how shell take the news that he is sleeping with Arthurs older sister that she appears to be using him for sex and that he is fairly intent on keeping such an arrangement in place for as long as possible.

So he opens with: I I met a girl.

You mean like a girlfriend? Shes sitting opposite him at his table in the coffee shop. Its ten in the morning on a week
day so quiet as the grave and theyre the only ones there. Shes officially taking her morning break, her feet propped up on the chair next to his, nibbling a flap jack.

Well I dont he waves a hand. Morgana is not his girlfriend, whatever else she is. Sort of. Um Gwen youve
had sex before, havent you?

Gwen gives him a very long, very suspicious look. Yes.

So can I um

No.

What? Merlin blinks, I havent even

Im not giving you sex tips, and we are not having this conversation.

But

Surely you made friends with Arthur for situations precisely like this? Gwen folds her arms, exasperated.

Arthur would make fun of me for not having a clue, Merlin informs her, honestly.

Yes but then hed give you advice. Which Im not going to do.

Oh but Gwen Dont oh but Gwen me! Gwens look over her flapjack is severe, Im not going to talk to you about what I do in bed,
Merlin!

Merlin heaves a sigh and then fixes her with his best pleading eyes. Gwen rolls hers.

Ive not killed your puppy, Merlin.

Please, Gwen please

Oh, for Gods sake, get a book out of the library or something!

She gets up and leaves him at the table.

The library does not prove fruitful, however, and the next day he comes back to beg her assistance a second time and, perhaps because the begging is accompanied by a book of his uncles that he thought shed like, or perhaps because its later in the day and shes in a better frame of mind, she acquiests.

We shall never, ever speak of this conversation once its been had, she warns him, before coming round to his side of the
table in the coffee shop, and cupping his ear to begin to whisper into it.

I think perhaps I should just out the middle man and sleep with Gwen herself, Morgana tells Merlin, three days later, once
hes had the opportunity to put her advice into practice.

Shes flushed and breathing hard still but her eyes are glittering. The grin she turns on him is pleased and Merlin feels rather smug, though he cant tell if shes joking or not about sleeping with Gwen.

Its like being stuck between a pair of divorced parents, Gwen and Arthur, he tells her, by way of distraction. Or more

like you know in cartoons, where youve got the character and theres a little devil on one of his shoulders and a little angel on the other? Its like that. Its like Im stuck in the middle whilst they fight for my soul Arthur trying to corrupt me, Gwen trying to keep me pure.

Morgana snorts, given what Gwen taught you to do with your tongue, it doesnt seem like shes that concerned about your purity.

Merlin grins back.

He made her cum tonight thats going to be enough to make him feel stupidly self-satisfied for at least a couple of days.

Morgana rolls onto her stomach, wraps an arm around his neck and plants a warm, wet kiss on his mouth. Shes never done that after theyve finished before shell kiss his neck or his shoulders before she tells him to get dressed but she leaves his mouth alone once theyre done having sex. He doesnt really know what it means for her to be breaking one of her own unwritten rules, but he likes it.

Somehow they end up managing to fuck a second time in that one hour. Theyre just lying together and she idly starts to play her fingers up and down his cock and suddenly hes hard and theres another condom so why not? But it turns out to be a mistake, because Merlin is exhausted afterwards. Hes been okay before, when theyve only done it the once and usually theres time for him to slip into the bathroom and splash his face and take a few deep breaths and maybe run to the kitchen for some coffee. (After the third time, Morgana made it for him). But twice in an hour proves too much hes sweaty and his head aches a little and he really just wants to curl up and take a nap. Preferably with Morgana.

But he has to get up and sneak out the back door and come round to the front and pretend to be awake and alert enough to play video games with Arthur.

It doesnt help that Morgana sidles into the room, looking tousled and sexy, as Merlin is stifling his third yawn. She flashes Merlin a secretive grin and then drops into an armchair across the room, peeling open a magazine and dangling her bare legs over one arm of the chair.

Merlin is temporarily distracted and crashes his Mario cart.

Arthur rolls his eyes, Christ, Merlin! Whats with you today?

What? Merlin isnt alert enough to catch this yawn before it blooms and he has to let it go, scrubbing his eyes as he does
so. Im Im fine

You look like you havent slept in days, Arthur points out, critically. Seriously what did you do last night?

From across the room, Morgana turns a snort of laughter into a coughing fit Merlin decides it would be a good idea to excuse himself and try to get things together in the bathroom.
____________________________________ ...continued here...

They keep sleeping together, though, over the next couple of weeks. It becomes routine he will turn up an hour before Arthur is expecting him; Morgana will quietly let him in round the back and theyll fuck, hard, in her bedroom on her bed or on the floor or once on her desk. A couple of times she climbs into his lap and wraps her arms around her shoulders to do it which feels a little odd, though Merlin likes how it feels somehow more intimate than when theyre lying down (even if its harder to keep all the right bits in the right places).

At first he feels a bit sort of apprehensive. What if making her cum that one time was a fluke? What if shes expecting it every time? What if he never gets it quite right again?

But Morgana tells him she likes the way his neck smells, and she likes the feel of his shoulders and she likes the nooks in his collar bones and the way his lips go when he smiles. She says those things and Merlin forgets to be terrified that this will end, that shes way out of his league, that Arthur is going to beat him to a pulp if he ever finds out and instead his stomach gets warm and he wants to kiss her. He thinks oh god, I think Im in love with you which is insane because all they ever do is fuck. And sometimes they talk about stupid random stuff like the weather or sushi, when they catch each other in the kitchen or the hall; before sex; after.

You cant fall in love with someone just because youre sleeping with them, can you?

It must be a chemical thing. Hes sure hes read about it how endorphins are released after sex to create a feeling of closeness. Biology forcing you to bond with your partner for the sake of the potential offspring.

Doesnt mean hes finding the smell of her hair any less pleasant recently, though.

A few weeks later after hes lost count of the number of times theyve had sex hes just finished and is gasping against her chest.

Did you ?

Mm? Oh yes, Morgana pushes her fingers through his hair, letting him rest his check against her

collarbone.

Thought so, he allows himself a grin and she laughs.

Her skin is slick and soft he kisses what he finds beneath his lips and she exhales, softly. You dont always have to ask, you know.

What?

About whether or not I came. I mean its nice that you do, but you dont have to, her fingers find the rim of one of his ears traces the shell of it.

Curious, now, he levers himself up on his elbows to look at her. Thought it was kind of important, though.

Her lips twitch she slides one hand beneath her head, against the pillows shrugs. Well it is. It is and it isnt. I dont know. Its nice but men are so fixated on the end-game. I think the process can be more important.

What do you mean? Merlin tries not to sound like too much of the insecure five year old he suddenly feels like.

Morgana reaches out, and gently tugs him down next to her on the pillows. Okay, she says, settling them both more comfortably amongst the tangle of bed-sheet and duvet, sex is like a street, yes? A long, long street with lots of interesting things all down it. And at the end of the street is a cake shop. And the cake shop is where everybody on the street wants to get to word of mouth has it that the cake shop is the best cake shop in the world that theres nothing like whats in there anywhere else and its so special, and so important, that everybodys running down the street trying to get to it. You following me so far?

Merlin nods.

Alright, so the things is, what nobodys noticing is that along this street theres a festival, and lights, and music, and dancers and well, once you pause, to take in all of that, and enjoy it, and experience it the cake shop doesnt seem so important anymore, she shrugged, and grinned, stroking his cheek. I mean dont get me wrong, you still want to get there. There really is the best cake in the world in that shop. But you know at the end of the day, its just cake. The streets where all the interesting stuff is happening.

Yeah but its orgasm-cake, Merlin pointed out, thats pretty special cake.

Morganas head tips back as she laughs.

I just mean, she giggles, into his hair, that you dont need to worry too much about it when you get too hung up on the orgasm-cake, you miss the party. And I like the party, Merlin I really like the party.

I thought you said we were on a street?

Clearly, I should work with fewer metaphors.

He grins.

He likes that its not difficult to talk to her about stuff. Even if the stuff they talk about is limited to sushi, the weather, and sex.

Not all girls are going to be so blas about the cake, though, she warns him, after a moment, some girls really need the cake. Remember that. Some girls need cake, he repeats, dutifully.

She laughs again, softly, and kisses his cheek.

Why do you I mean what do you see in me, Morgana? He asks, when things have been comfortably quiet for a little bit longer.

She raises her eyebrows, what do you mean?

Merlin swallows an awkward laugh glances away from her. (For all hes sort of used to her nakedness these days, its still a bit distracting that her breasts are right there).

I mean his ears go red, Im so and youre so

His train of thought is interrupted by Morgana kissing him. Perhaps, she begins, a moment later, you should let me worry about whether or not Im out of your league?

Who said anything about you being out of my league?

Thats what youre thinking, Morgana finds his ribs with a finger and delivers a gentle poke. I like you, Merlin, okay? Youre interesting. And you have nice collar bones. Now stop worrying if I didnt want to sleep with you, I wouldnt be sleeping with you.

He nods, unconvinced, and she rolls her eyes but her smile is genuine enough, and her mouth is soft when she kisses him again.

Its her birthday the following week, and Merlins torn. As far as the outside world is concerned, he barely knows Morgana getting her a present would look really weird. On the other hand how many times do you have to see someone naked before getting them birthday presents becomes a bit mandatory?

Gwen, he asks, two days before Morganas birthday when he still hasnt figured out what to do, what do you get a girl whos not your girlfriend but who youre sleeping with if its her birthday?

Gwen puts down her morning flapjack. What?

I said

I heard you, she holds up a hand, who are you sleeping with, Merlin?

Um Merlin looks down, its a bit complicated

Simplify it for me, she folds her arms.

Merlin tugs distractedly at the sleeve of one of his jumpers. Theres a girl whos not my girlfriend. I wish she was, but she isnt. But we have sex quite a lot.

Is this the girl you asked about when you know, she waves a hand, that conversation were never going to talk about again?

Mm, Merlin nods, attempting nonchalance.

I see. Gwen goes back to nibbling her flapjack, whens her birthday?

The day after tomorrow.

And you like her?

Yeah well if I didnt, I wouldnt be sleeping with her, Merlin shrugs.

Gwen grins, I dont think you necessarily have to like someone to get into bed with them. At least, so Im told.

Well, I like this girl. Merlin tells her, shes shes great, Gwen, she is you wouldnt think wed have anything in common but we seem to always be able to talk about stuff and anyway. I feel like I should get her something but I mean would it be weird?

You want her to be your girlfriend? Gwens head quirks, then no its not weird. Just dont get her anything too expensive. If you talk so much get her something simple but you know something that will mean something to her. Show how well you know her.

Mm, Merlin considers then, abruptly, hits upon a plan. Okay. Right.

Hes invited to the party because hes Arthurs closest friend. There are a lot of people there and he doesnt really get to see Morgana anyway. Still, he manages to eventually slip away and up to her bedroom, where he leaves the little clear plastic bottle of soapy liquid on her desk a note stuck to the top. Happy Birthday, - M.

At half three in the morning, having had a bit too much to drink, he still has it in the back of his mind to look for her and somehow manages to struggle up three flights of stairs, to the roof.

Morgana is resting her elbows on the low wall designed to keep people from hurling themselves from the chimney tops, blowing bubbles into the clear, cold starry night.

Hi, he says, making her jump. Then adds, happy happy birthday.

Her lips twitch. Fancy meeting you here.

Mm, Merlin agrees.

He manages to walk in a straight line towards her, and catches himself on the wall, because his knees have suddenly decided that now would be a very good time to cease doing their job correctly and give way beneath him.

Morgana ignores him for a moment, blowing another stream of bubbles over the wall.

Do you like them? Merlin asks, feeling his tongue go oddly dry, the um the bubbles? I thought you would like them.

I like them, Merlin, Morgana assures him.

Happy birthday, Merlin repeats, sincerely and Morgana laughs.

Youre an adorable drunk.

Im not drunk! He taps his chest, emphatically.

Im sure youre not. Well, he hesitates, wondering, vaguely, if shell think less of him, um I might be a bit drunk. But thats um mostly Arthurs fault. He kept giving me drinks and I couldnt put any of them down until Id drunk some!

Oh, he gets a lot of people that way.

Hes sneaky, Merlin is sincere, and I think he fancies Gwen Gwen. Um Guinevere. He stares at her breasts a lot. She doesnt like him.

I dont blame her.

Gwens the one who taught me to do that thing with my tongue. I remember.

Shes a good friend.

The best.

Im going to sit down now, he informs her, because my legs hurt.

He sits down.

Morgana stays standing, blowing her bubbles. Shes wearing a dress that cuts off just above the knee, leaving a lot of soft, pale calf exposed. He touches it, distractedly tentatively running his finger tips from her knee to her ankle. It feels nice. Hes always liked her legs.

He likes all of her, actually. He likes every little bit of her and he especially likes the brain part of her the part that is the bit that makes her all Morgana-ish.

He likes that bit.

She sits down next to him after a while, tucking her skirt beneath her he catches a glimpse of her knickers and is too drunk to blush when she kisses his cheek.

Youre so cute, Merlin.

Youre very pretty, he replies, honestly. Then adds, do you want to be my girlfriend? Ill be your boyfriend. Id be a good one. But Ive never had a girlfriend before not properly with you know sex.

She giggles, but she doesnt say what hes expecting which is instantly no.

She just wraps her arms around him; presses her lips close to his ear. If you can remember this conversation in the morning, we can go out sometime, okay?

Merlin nods, feels a grin split his face in two. Ill remember, he promises.

Morgana kisses him she tastes like wine and chocolate birthday cake. ________________________________________ ___________________

It takes him two days, but he remembers eventually. The conversation comes back to him in a bolt at about three in the morning and he sits up, blinking, thinking did she did she actually ?

He goes over to the Pendragon mansion the next day, when he knows Arthur will be at rugby practice, with his hair combed and his new favourite jacket on.

Morgana answers the door in her pyjamas, looking bemused. What are you doing here?

Hes feeling cocky, so he grins up at her from the front step. You said youd go out with me.

Theres a pause, as she contemplates him, and her lips twitch, and he cant tell if she looks sort of pleased?

What, now? She asks.

He shrugs, if you want.

Where to?

Um he considers, where do you want to go?

She hovers, thinking her eyes soften; she bites her lip. Hang on a second.

It takes her ten minutes to reappear, fully dressed, purse tucked under one arm she grabs his elbow as she sweeps past him. Come on then. I know a place.

They walk. Its a sunny late morning, cool and breezy, the pavements still glittering frost. Morganas hair is loose and full of kinks and curls because she hasnt had time to take the straighteners to it like she normally does. She swings her purse from her fingertips and tips her head up, gazing at the clear blue sky.

Merlin stares at her doesnt think hes ever seen her outside by daylight before. Not this close, anyway.

Where are we going?

She shrugs, and grins, youll see.

How am I meant to be taking you out if I dont know where were going?

Morgana laughs, youre not taking me out. Were going out together. You initiated, I picked the place. And were splitting the bill. So.

Okay, Merlin says, relieved that hes only going to have to spend as much as he wants to.

So, she begins again, hows life at university treating you?

They have a terrifyingly normal conversation about his subjects, his grades, his next essay deadlines. Hes in first year, shes newly graduated, still picking haphazardly at her options.

The only things I really like to do are men and reading, she says, and somehow I dont think Uther would approve of me becoming a prostitute who works out of the library, do you?

No, he agrees, soberly, probably not.

She laughs.

Turns out, shes leading him to a sushi bar. Hes never had sushi before.

Its kind of greedy, you know, he tells her, when theyre sat at the back and shes eyeing their food with an experienced air, youre taking all of my virginities for yourself.

You have a sushi-hymen for me to pop? She lifts her eyebrows, feigning genuine confusion, and he laughs which she promptly uses as an opportunity to thrust a salmon roll between his lips.

It tastes odd. Not fishy, though. Different. Sort of clean clear sharp. He doesnt know. Not bad though.

Done, she informs him, with a grin. Quick and painless, Merlin. Do you like it?

Mmph, is all Merlin can manage, around rice and fish and something he suspects is seaweed.

She giggles, and delicately picks up another smaller round of rice with something bright pressed into its centre, like a jewel he cant tell whether its more fish or just a vegetable.

Some of it he cant stomach but most of it he can. Morgana is patient with him, picking out what she thinks hell like and telling him whats in each piece.

My mother liked sushi, she tells him, I always thought it looked so pretty but I never liked any of it. Then when she died I sort of made myself eat it, so I could be like her. I made myself do it so much I got to like it.

He nods. My dad, he begins, abruptly, met my mum in a chip shop. He worked there. He used to give her free chip butties. Thats all she ever really tells me about him. How weird is that? He adds, after a moment, I dont like chip butties.

Her lips twitch. Parents.

Yeah, I know.

They end up talking a lot about their respective childhoods. Morganas memories are fond but smeared by the tragic stain of her parents demise; Merlins are convoluted he loves his quiet home life with his mother and he loves the village he grew up with, but he hates how every other young person there made his life so difficult. He appreciates the education he received via scholarship at an exclusive boarding school, but he hates that he was derided there as an impoverished country bumpkin; and he hates that upon returning home he was promptly upgraded from simply weird to posh, up himself and weird.

Morgana is sympathetic.

No one ever knew what to make of me at school, either, she tells him, I overdosed on the black eyeliner and nail polish a bit back in the day, which was enough to get me labelled oh, anything from a slut to some kind of demon-summoner

Bet they left you alone, though, Merlin says, and she shrugs, noncommittally.

Merlin cant imagine Morgana being picked on. Shes such a power-house of confidence and self-belief and shes pretty and charming and smart, all of which qualities he suspects would have preserved him at least a little in school. But maybe that was part of the problem pretty, charming and smart can too easily be misconstrued as slutty, sluttier and bitchy, particularly in someone who likely kept herself to herself unless she had some ulterior motive to socialise.

Universitys so much better than school, though, she tells him, a moment later, youll be fine.

Im already fine, he tells her, Im on a lunch date with a graduate.

She throws her head when she laughs.

They wonder back to the Pendragon estate after theyve finished eating she slips her arm into his as they walk.

Um he checks his watch when they get to the house, its Friday Arthurs not going to be back from rugby practice for an hour, is he?

Morgana shrugs, innocently.

Um so we could I mean, if you want Merlin abruptly realises that hes never actually initiated the sex before. He either turns up at times when she knows to expect him or she grabs him at an opportune moment whilst hes meant to be hanging out with Arthur.

What? Morgana puts her hands on her hips and arches her brows, sex? On a first date? What kind of a girl do you think I am, Merlin?

Hes momentarily confused by her mock-outrage until he catches the sparkle in her eyes and realises that shes teasing him. He smiles, sheepishly.

Only only if you want

Uthers around, she waves a hand, its probably not a good idea today.

Oh right. He realises he sounds extremely disappointed. He is disappointed. He likes having sex with her.

Morganas expression momentarily softens. She stands on tip-toes to kiss his cheek her hair smells different today; she must have changed shampoo brands. I had a good time, Merlin. We should do this again, okay?

Were not replacing sex with lunch dates, are we?

She snorts, not likely. Whens the next time youre going to be round?

Oh um tomorrow, probably Arthur says he got something new

Bring condoms, Morgana advises, Im out of them.

Ah yeah, sure. Hes a mature young man in a sexual relationship he can buy condoms without experiencing excruciating embarrassment. Of course he can.

See you tomorrow, Merlin, she giggles, and disappears inside the house.

The promise of sex (and the knowledge that Morgana is definitely the kind of woman who has her head screwed on firmly enough that shell refuse him if they dont have protection) is enough to chivvy him to the chemists that evening though. Still, on finding the right section of the shop, hes confronted by a bewildering array of brands and sizes and and extra things (what the hell are ribs when theyre in latex and why does a condom have them?!)

Okay, now hes very, very tempted to call Arthur for help. Condoms dont necessarily mean that hes having sex just that hes preparing for it. Arthur will laugh at him for being clueless but he might actually be of some use.

Except except

He calls Gwen.

Gwen at least has the decency to cover the phone whilst she laughs at him, which he appreciates.

Oh God, Merlin she sighs, after shes regained some composure, okay look, just get the normal kind no you know, extras. There should be like a Boots own brand theyre fairly reliable and

should be cheap, okay?

Yeah but they come in sizes.

and?

Well how do you you know tell

I dont know, Merlin! I dont have male genitalia!

She has to break off to laugh again. Once she stops, she says, havent you been sleeping with this girl for a while now? How come you still dont know about this stuff?

Well Morgana always had condoms! Merlin snaps, flustered, because an old lady is in the process of hobbling by and is giving him a very strange look.

There was a pause, as he realises what hes said.

Morgana? Gwens voice wavers, as in Pendragon? Isnt she Arthurs older sister?

Uh Merlin flounders.

Is that who youve been sleeping with all this time? Gwen sounds incredulous, Morgana Pendragon? Tall, gorgeous, gothic looks like a vampire had sex with Keira Knightly? That Morgana?

Merlin is ever so slightly peeved by her tone, is that so hard to believe?

Oh! No! I didnt I mean I just Morgana Pendragon?

Yes, Merlin retorts, Morgana Pendragon. Look, you cant tell anyone, okay, Gwen?

Who am I going to tell? She sounds exasperated. Theres a pause, a soft exhalation of breath, this is the girl you got all worked up over birthday presents for?

Yeah.

You got her something though?

Bubbles.

Bubbles?

Its a thing.

okay.

He can hear her scrunching up her face on the other end of the line doing something very Gwen-ish with her nose and her nervous hands. So what happened? You just started sleeping together one day?

Basically, yeah.

Wow. She considers, sounds like a porno.

He has to laugh. Its its complicated, Gwen. But shes nice. Shes really really nice. I like her. Thats nice, she pauses, does Arthur know?

God no.

You dont want to tell him?

Hed kill me, Merlin tentatively takes down a box of condoms and wonders how an earth they can be strawberry flavoured. How do you flavour latex? They act like they want to kill each other half the time but Arthurs really protective of Morgana, Gwen, seriously. She told me a couple of girls gave her trouble one year at school and Arthur went after them with a shovel. Hes decked pretty much every one of her boyfriends.

Thats a bit he can hear the hesitation in Gwens voice, old fashioned

In his own weird way, he loves her, Merlin replies, I really dont think hed be keen on the idea of me and her shagging.

No I can see that

Gwen?

Mm?

Are glow in the dark condoms genuinely useful or is it just a gimmick?

He arrives late at the Pendragon estate the next day which means that he arrives on time to meet Arthur, which means theres no time to have sex with Morgana. He catches her pouting at him from the hallway when he arrives, and immediately has to tactically position his rucksack to hide his burgeoning erection.

An hour later he goes to find the toilet only to have Morgana yank him into a broom cupboard.

Please god tell me you remembered the condoms.

Um yeah. He manages, through a mouthful of her hair the cupboard is cramped.

Fantastic, she sighs.

Theres a fumbling then a bare bulb clicks into illumination above their heads, and Morgana calmly locks the broom cupboard door behind them. Then she frowns at him. Why were you late? Youre never late.

Slept in, he smiles, sheepishly.

Students, she rolls her eyes, but then she kisses him, so he suspects that hes forgiven.

They fuck, semi-clothed and silent, against what little wall-space is not obscured by shelves, a mop, a ladder and three buckets. For hasty, messy, sweaty sex that has to be almost entirely mute, its surprisingly good. Not that its ever bad but but Morgana kisses him and kisses him until hes sure she must be bruising his mouth, and shes hot and raw and gasping. She hisses god fuck please Christ yes there, there there, Merlin! As he presses hard against her clit with his fingers, and she cums whilst hes still inside her, surprisingly not very close to cuming himself yet.

She mouths his collar bones and the crook of his neck, breathes Oh God, Merlin stroking her fingers through his hair and nestling against him until he reaches his climax, a few minutes later.

She kisses his mouth afterwards she is warm, and hard and damp against him, and he thinks I really am in love with you. For a moment, they are pressed together, foreheads touching he twists his fingers through hers and doesnt want to move or think about the world outside the broom cupboard.

She is grinning into his gasping mouth.

I really like you, Merlin. Good, he says, thats um thats good.

What are you doing on Monday?

couple of lectures, why?

Free in the evening, though?

I think so We should go out somewhere.

He blinks, grins, where?

Dont know. You pick. I picked last time its only fair.

Okay.

Then, abruptly, there is Arthurs voice in the hall loudly demanding to know where the hell hes got to, so they scramble to get dressed and straighten their hair and Merlin guiltily thrusts the condom (not glow in the dark, nor ribbed, nor strawberry flavoured, for all he was tempted to satisfy his curiosity) behind a used paint can before slipping out of the cupboard ahead of Morgana.

Merlin picks his uncles house.

Gaius has gone away for a couple of days to some medical conference in Wales so they have the place to themselves, and somehow Merlin wants to see her there, in the surroundings with which hes most familiar. He has this urge to see her out of the extravagant grandeur of chrome kitchen fittings and white marble floors that characterise the Pendragon mansion, and in amongst his uncles homely chaos, stacked high on every surface in the living room. He wants to see Morgana amongst the guddle of cooking implements in the kitchen the recipe books, the dying plants and seashells on the window sill, the fridge and stove and cupboards that were all installed in the 1960s and are somehow still working.

He cooks, and she makes room for herself on the counter, perches on its edge, next to the old, deep stone sink, and watches him. She fiddles with a little plastic toy soldier on one of the shelves and she touches the collection of marbles and pebbles and semi-precious stones piled up next to it.

In her expensive jeans and designer glasses she looks completely alien to this place, which screams muddy wellies, old dogs and duffle coats. But she doesnt seem unhappy, either. Just curious.

Hes making macaroni cheese the kind his mother used to make him when he was little and they take it up to his room to eat; sit on the floor on a blanket, with candles and cheap wine.

Youre a good cook, Merlin, she tells him.

Thanks. Hes watching the way shes looking about her.

He has the entire bit under the roof to himself a great long attic room, with his bed at one end, and a sofa, an old black and white TV, book shelves and a coffee table at the other. Theres also a rickety old desk, with the second hand laptop he got off ebay, some broken pens, dog-eared textbooks and a dusty chess set.

He likes it his bedroom back home wasnt much more than a cupboard compared to this and at school he shared a dormitory half this size with six other boys. But hes also painfully aware of how meagre it is by the standards Morgana is used to.

Its a nice place, Merlin, she seems to sense his anxiety. Its very you. And its comfortable. Feels like its been lived in.

Mostly because it has been, Merlin points out, Gaius grew up here. This was my great grandparents house. Uther built the mansion up himself, Morgana replies, the Pendragons are an old family but they lost all their money a couple of generations back. Once hed made his millions he spent them buying back their old lands and building the house he imagines they would have had. But I dont know it feels kind of sterile sometimes. Empty. I mean, three people living in a ten bedroom, three story mansion? Even with the butler and the cook and the cleaning ladies the place is never exactly lively.

No, I can see that, Merlin agrees. Hes never been in half the place anyway just the games room and the kitchen, one of the bathrooms, the big function room where Morganas birthday party was based, and of course Morganas bedroom.

My parents had a place that was more like this, Morgana tells him, leaning back on her hands, I

mean there was less stuff and it was probably a little bit bigger but it was just a normal sort of house, you know? We had a huge garden though there was a pond with fish, and Id named them all. A quick, odd little smile struggles to assert itself on her lips, when Uther first took guardianship of me I thought wed be living in my house. That him and Arthur would just come and stay with me and I thought it would be like when they came to visit on holidays, except without my parents, and maybe it wouldnt be so bad, you know? They, um they had to explain to me that I was going to have to move not just out of my house but out of the country, to England . I really hated Uther for a while, for making me. I didnt understand why we couldnt just have stayed in Ireland . I was convinced, for a long time, that as soon as I turned eighteen I was going to go back and move into my old house again. Took me ages to realise that it would have been sold that someone else lives there now. Silly, really. Its not silly, Merlin replies, earnestly. Hes a little bit heart-broken for poor, grieving, twelve year old Morgana, who so abruptly lost everything shed ever known. He wants to reach back through the years and hold onto her promise her shell come out alright, in the end.

Morganas lips twitch she shakes her head. Sorry. Im bringing the mood down a little here. No its fine, Merlin shakes his head, Ive had much more depressing dates, trust me. The first one I ever went on, I was so nervous that I was sick all over the restaurant table. Oh, Merlin

I was an anxious sixteen year old.

Clearly.

They finish the meal, and lie on their backs on the floor, looking up at his sloping ceilings, which are covered in glowing stars.

Gaius put them there, Merlin tells Morgana, as he talks her through the various constellations, when I was little, when he used to come and visit me and my mum, I went through this phase where I was really into, you know space, the planets, all of that. Every time he came out to see us hed bring me another book about stars or something he taught me how to recognise the planets in the night sky. The first time I came to stay here on my own, when I was I dunno, maybe ten, he put the stars on the ceiling, so Id feel more at home.

Thats so nice.

Yeah, yeah it was. He rubs his eyes, thinking back. Morgana curls gentle fingers around his wrist and squeezes.

Your bed is too small, she complains, later, when theyre curled up in it together still fully clothed, on top of the duvet. The room is dark aside from the candles, which are still burning in their holders on the floor.

Well we cant all have four-posters, Morgana.

She giggles, and kisses him.

They are half way through undressing each other oh, so youre a sex on the second date kind of girl, then? when they hear the front door of the house slam.

Merlin bolts upright, listening intently.

Thought you said your uncle was away? Morgana asks, softly she is lying back beneath him, propped up on he elbows. The soft curve of her bare shoulders in the candle light is distracting.

Hes meant to be! Merlin replies, he must have come back early hang on.

He slides off the bed in his bare feet and pads over to the stairs that are the entrance to his room. Theres a door a the bottom of the stairs, which he has left ajar craning his neck allows him to see out onto the landing, and into the hall below. Gaius and, he realises, with a horrifying lurch, his mother are beneath him, shrugging off their coats and talking about the bad quality of the roads in their area.

Oh, he must be in, Gaius is saying, theres his coat all crumpled up as usual and what has he done to the kitchen? Merlin!

Behind him, Merlin can hear Morgana spluttering laughter at the ridiculous nature of their predicament.

Merlin, are you up there? Gaius demands, as Merlin beats a hasty retreat out of sight, come down I brought your mother back for a visit.

Um Merlin raises his voice loud enough to be heard as he frantically yanks on his shirt Morgana throws his jeans at him from across the room. She looks as if shes enjoying this just a tiny bit too much. Ill Ill be just a minute

Hurry up, will you? Its late and what have you done to my kitchen? Its a mess, Merlin.

Stay here, Merlin scurries back to Morgana, Gaius always goes to bed at eleven, mum wont stay up much later you can leave after that.

Im glad youre so proud of the fact that youre sleeping with me, Merlin, Morgana retorts, coolly.

Merlin flushes, Im not its just Gaius has this rule about look, please dont take this the wrong way Ireally like you but Gaius is scary when hes angry. And also my mother must never know that I have had sex. Shes Catholic. Its complicated.

Morgana snorts, rolls her eyes, but nods, waving him away.

Merlin tumbles downstairs and into the kitchen a minute or so later, doing his best to look pleased rather than terrified. Mum!

Sweetheart, she her name is Hunith sweeps him up, oh, my god what is Gaius feeding you?

Youve got even skinnier!

I do try to make him eat, Hunith, but he runs around so much Gaius waves a hand, from where hes poking about the dishes in the sink, Merlin, what have you been doing in here? Oh I um made some macaroni cheese, Merlin replies.

Macaroni how much did you make, exactly? Gaius waves a pot, as if the very idea of macaroni cheese offends him, and would it have killed you to clean up a little?

I was um making some for later Merlin offers, a little lamely.

Gaius flashes him a deeply sceptical look, well you can tidy this mess up before you go to bed and no mistake.

Whose coat is that? Hunith asks, abruptly.

And Merlin balks, because theres Morganas expensive designer denim jacket over the back of one of the chairs quite obviously a girls, quite obviously out of place.

Oh I um Merlins head promptly goes completely blank.

Have you had someone over? Gaius glares at him, you know how I feel about large gatherings of todays youth on my property, Merlin.

It wasnt a a large gathering it was just

Me, Morgana suddenly appears in the door way, it was just me. Merlin made me dinner. But I was about to go anyway.

She looks, bless her, absolutely immaculate. Not one hair out of place, not one piece of clothing wrinkled, not a single thing to suggest that Merlin had his hands down her knickers barely ten minutes previously.

Oh, Hunith stands up. She looks pleased? oh, well, arent you lovely? And you werent going to introduce us to your um your friend, Merlin?

Um Merlin glances from his mother to Morgana and back again. He can feel his ears beginning to burn is aware that hes blushing like a fool. Mum, this is Morgana. Morgana my mum. And my great uncle, Gaius.

Nice to meet you both, Morganas smile is brilliantly warm and fiendishly innocent. Merlin catches the mischievous glint in her eye but suspects that neither his uncle nor his mother will know her well enough to see it themselves.

Very nice, Hunith agrees. She still seems bizarrely enthused by the entire scenario, and how long have you two known each other?

A few months, Morgana replies, Merlins very sweet to me.

But of course he is! Hunith cries, I raised a gentleman, didnt I, Merlin?

Mum Merlin suspects that if his face gets any hotter his eyes are going to melt.

But dont feel you have to go on our account! Hunith adds, ignoring her son, please come in Gaius was about to make some tea

I have to be up early tomorrow, Morgana interrupts her, her tone finely balanced between an apology and a refusal, I really was about to leave. But its nice to meet you. And you dear, and you, Hunith agrees.

Ill Ill walk you to your car, Merlin hurries past his mother to follow Morgana out.

Morgana giggles into his shoulder once theyve closed the front door. Sorry.

No no its fine

Your face she leans against him for a moment, oh, Merlin, youre mums lovely.

She did take that alarmingly well, Merlin frowns for a moment. I hope Gaius hasnt been slipping her anti-depressants again. He does that sometimes it doesnt seem right

your family may be a bit weirder than mine, Morgana informs him, as they begin to walk to her car. Which is saying something, considering.

She pulls him closer and kisses him before getting in she tastes like cheap wine and smells like the sex they didnt quite get to have.

Youre coming round tomorrow, yeah?

Yeah.

Be early. Obviously.

She flashes him a brilliant smile as she drives past and Merlin feels something odd happen to his stomach. He stays on the side of the pavement for a moment, grinning after her car. And then he realises that in all likelihood his mother and Gaius can see him from the kitchen window and decides to go back inside.

It turns out, shes left her digital camera behind in his room when he goes up after enduring an hour of questioning from his still oddly-enthused mother and deeply suspicious uncle. Shes stuck a post-it not to the screen:

Turn me on.

A little smiley face next to her distinctive cursive. Merlin senses some typically Morgana-ish mischief afoot, and sits down on the edge of the bed to do as instructed.

The camera is set to display previously taken images as soon as it powers up and it takes Merlin a moment to realise that what shes done is leave photos of her semi-clothed self on the memory card. In the five minutes or so between him leaving her in his bedroom and her joining him in the kitchen, shes photographed every inch of her exposed flesh her breasts, her abdomen, her parted thighs and whats between them

The shots are all a little shadowy, one or two a bit blurred though that somehow adds to the tantalising, secretive, intimate nature of them. Youd never find something like this on a porn site nothing false or plastic or photoshoped about them. This is Morgana, showing him her body, just for him, just for her. It should be vulgar, except that its really not. Its hot but its also kind of beautiful.

He licks his lips, then slides to down to lie on the bed in the position she must have been in to take these photos in her place, recognising (or perhaps only imagining) faint traces of her perfume still on his bed-sheets. Shes so shes just so he touches a tentative finger tip to the screen of the camera, tracing the outline of her shape with a nail.

You are the best thing that has ever, ever happened to me, he tells her picture and then, embarrassed, he quickly turns the camera off. ________________________________________ _______________
New year approaches. Of course theres going to be a party on the Pendragon estate and both Arthur and Morgana invite him.

I want someone there Id actually like to kiss at midnight, Morgana tells him, and his stomach turns over and he finds himself grinning
like an idiot.

Bring Gwen, Arthur tells him, separately, whats she like when shes drunk, by the way?

Ive never seen her have more than a glass of wine with a meal, Merlin replies, coolly, plus, shed still slap you sideways if you tried
anything. She doesnt like you, Arthur.

She doesnt know me!

You spent all four of your conversations staring at her breasts! Merlin points out, a little exasperated, how do you think most women
are going to react to that kind of treatment?

I didnt spend all of our conversations

Yes, you did!

Oh fuck off. Youre a virgin, you cant talk.

And Merlin bites his tongue.

Hes actually spending more time snogging Morgana than shagging her at the moment anyway. They keep going out, where its kind of hard to fuck, though its perfectly acceptable for her to pull him across the table in their favourite sushi place to shove her tongue down his throat. Actually they have a few places where they like to go and make out. Its fun. He never would have guessed how much fun it would be.

In spite of herself, Morgana seems to have gained an interest in conversation after all. Just before Christmas, she gave him her email address, and now they talk all the time. All the time. Even when theyre not emailing back and forth, the knowledge that shell answer inside ten minutes if he sends her a note is enough to make him feel like hes never really alone anymore. And what really seems strange is that he likes it.

Merlin is very used to solitude. Hes never had more than a few close friends at a time a childhood of alienation from his peers means that he has learned to like his own company. But now he likes Morganas company even more.

Its so weird, how easy this has become. He cant believe he was ever nervous about having sex with her. Hes still terrified that it will end, but every time Morgana traces his collar bone with a finger, or wraps her arms around his neck, or smirks into his shoulder, the possibility becomes more remote.

Stealing away from Arthur to shag is becoming more difficult because its becoming increasingly distracting. He doesnt want to leave afterwards they get into these long, rambling conversations. Its getting harder to keep things under wraps, as well, because touching her is becoming reflexive. More than once hes caught himself reaching for her automatically despite Arthur being in the same room.

Fortunately, Arthur Pendragon is rarely as observant as he would like to believe that he is, and doesnt seem to have noticed.

Why havent you just told him? Gwen asks, as they make their way up the drive of the Pendragon estate, on new years eve, I mean,
youre not really just sleeping together any more, are you? Like it or not, shagging with good conversation is essentially a relationship. Is Arthur really going to react that badly to you being her boyfriend?

Morgana doesnt want to tell him, Merlin replies, listlessly. She doesnt want to tell anyone.

Why not?

She shes terrified of the idea that what she has with Merlin might be real shes terrified that shes going to end up alone like
Uther, like shes been since her parents died she just has it in her head that she doesnt really do relationships.

What exactly does she think shes doing with you?

Im not going to push her, Merlin replies, Im fine with not telling Arthur. Im fine with not telling anyone. Whatever she needs to feel
comfortable I like her, Gwen. I want her to feel secure.

Youre too nice for your own good, Merlin, Gwen eyes him critically for a moment, she ought to be proud shes got you. Youre not
something to be ashamed of.

Shes not ashamed

Well shes acting like she is. Gwen is being uncharacteristically snappish Merlin gazes at her for a moment, wide-eyed. But it might
just be the prospect of being in close proximity to Arthur. She doesnt like him, after all.

They reach the mansions front door theres a couple of bouncers on it, which Merlin finds unsurprising, for, judging by the lights and the noise coming from inside, for once, the great Pendragon mansion is at full capacity and in all likelihood there will be gatecrashers trying to get in.

You Merlin? The bouncer asks and Merlin nods he recognises him. One of the Pendragons gardeners.

In you go, then, the man waves them inside and thankfully Arthurs just there in the hall, chatting up some blonde whom he
immediately abandons when he sees Merlin and Gwen.

Ah! He grins at them looks already as if he might have had a bit too much to drink, Merlin, my good man and Guinevere.

Gwen, Gwen corrects, firmly.

Guinevere! Arthur enthuses, undeterred, come in, the pair of you! Coats over here and go and find something to drink, weve got so
much booze well probably drown in it so we kind of need some more help on that front this way!

Merlin catches only the vaguest glimpse of Morgana sees her flash him a grin from across the main room, but she makes no attempt to reach him. Arthur throws an arm around his shoulder and drags him over to a horde of girls hes never met before.

Merlin, he informs him, earnestly, I believe it my duty as your friend to get you laid before midnight you can ring in the new year as
a true man. Think of it as a late Christmas present.

Um Merlin manages, a little awkwardly. He sees Gwen cast him a significant look before she disappears into the crowd in the general
direction of the drinks cabinet.

He spends the next excruciating two hours desperately fending off all three of the women that Arthur thrusts him at. Finally, Gwen comes to his rescue by grabbing Arthurs arm and telling him that theyre out of diet coke and why dont they go and look for some?

Merlin hastily turns to hapless, half-drunk girl number three, apologetically informs her that he sort of has a girlfriend, and scurries away.

He discovers Morgana on the veranda outside the main room, blowing bubbles.

Its a breezy night and threatening rain so nobody else is mad enough to be out here, despite the fact that its approaching midnight and theres meant to be fireworks. Morgana looks about as morose as its possible to be whilst blowing bubbles (the same bottle he gave her for her birthday, he realises).

Hi, he says, and she starts then smiles at him, genuinely warm.

Merlin!

You alright? He asks, its kind of cold out here.

She shrugs, I just wanted some air. Large parties, small spaces, loud noises she shakes her head.

Kind of draining, Merlin agrees.

They exchange quick, knowing grins and then Merlin sidles over to her. There is a long, companionable silence as they stand side by side with the light from the house at their backs, watching Morganas bubbles drifting out into the dark. Merlins watch bleeps fifteen minutes until midnight.

You know what I would rather be doing right now? Morgana asks, abruptly.

Merlin shrugs, innocently. I could take a wild guess. Morgana carefully screws on the top of her bottle of bubble liquid, pockets it and then reaches across the gap between them to gently tangle their fingers together.

She leads him back into the main room, through the crowd, past revellers and drunk students and snogging couples and past the kitchen where Merlin is fairly certain that he just spotted Gwen and Arthur going at it on the table, and up the stairs, and down the hall, and into Morganas bedroom.

There doesnt really feel as if there can be anything better than kissing and undressing Morgana Pendragon in those last fifteen minutes of the year. She pushes him onto her bed, straddles his lap in her underwear and presses her open mouth to his, stealing away his breath as he tangles one hand in her hair in a way he wouldnt have dared to a few weeks previously. He is drinking her in as if he is a man gasping in the desert and she is the last thing between him and death. Shes clinging to him too, he realises, a moment later one arm about his shoulders, one hand cupping his face.

Its like a sharp punch to the gut, this sudden rush of desire. Not the shock of the first time, nor the trepidation of the second (or forth, or fifth) but the sheer force of need is enough to make Merlin a little giddy. Morgana is gazing at him, her breath still short, dipping her head to allow her nose to touch his.

She doesnt say a word and Merlin cant find any of his own. He knows hell feel like an idiot if he tries to talk anyway what would he say? Everything he feels he should say sounds far too much like every Hollywood romance hes ever seen I need you, I love you, I missed you, I didnt know how much I missed you

I know who you are, he wants to say. I know who you are and I like it and I hope you like me.

But in that moment theres a sudden eruption from outside, and a chorus of voices all raised up at once, and his watch bleeps. Midnight.

Merlin swallows. Happy new year, Morgana.

Happy new year, Merlin. She strokes his jaw for a moment dips, leans down and kisses him.

He kisses her back, enjoying the moment of closeness and connection. When its over he feels even more as if he should say something, but he has no idea what. Theyre left regarding each other again breathing each other in.

Morgana he manages, and then stops, helpless.

Lie down, Morgana suggests, softly, and he does, as she deftly peals off her bra and lace knickers.

He traces a pattern on her thigh as he watches her looks at the fall of her hair and the flutter of her eyelashes. Youre so beautiful, he tells her, and then flushes, because it sounds stupid, even if its true.

But she smiles he thinks he thinks shes blushing. It makes him feel odd. Hes known for a while that for all Morgana is effortlessly glamorous and endlessly sophisticated, deep down she doesnt feel like a particularly attractive person. Her past is too ugly, her world too convoluted she feels like that rotten, gawkish, grieving twelve year old, still. The designer wardrobe and the black eyeliner is a disguise she hopes will keep the outside world from recognising her awkward, angry little self.

You are beautiful though, he insists, as she lies down next to him he rolls onto his side to wrap her up in himself, folds one arm
about her waist, carefully strokes the hair back off her face.

I dont need to be told, Merlin, she nestles closer against him.

Doesnt mean you dont want to be told, occasionally.

She smiles, oh, so youre just flattering me, now?

Im being honest in a way that youll appreciate.

She snorts, think of something else to be honest about.

Youre honest. And youre intelligent. And I like your nose.

The sex feels impossibly good. Morgana arches her back and mumbles his name, drags her fingers through his hair and scrapes her nails down his back. He rocks against her, feels between them where they are joined and manages to stroke her clit, which makes her gasp. His fingers are slick and clumsy and Morganas face is flushed, her eyes half closed, her hair sticking to her brow and shoulders, and somehow its glorious.

He cums after maybe seven minutes (has to be a record) and rolls onto his back, head spinning. Morgana peels the condom off his softening cock, then leans over him to press her mouth to his. He feels her hair spilling across his chest, one of her hands tracing his collar bone.

God, Merlin.

Thanks.

She laughs into his shoulder then flops onto her back next to him, grinning.

Did you Merlin tries to catch his breath, did you

Mm? No, Morgana shakes her head, its fine, Merlin.

No, Merlin shakes his head, its not hang on Ill do something about that in in a second if you could just hold on

Morgana snorts, well, Im not going anywhere.

Hes never properly gone down on her before Gwen told him about a couple of things that he could do but hes only used them briefly and he prefers his fingers. He knows how to use his fingers. But actually using his mouth turns out to be the best idea hes ever had, as Morgana gasps and squirms and makes a low, trembling sound in the back of her throat that hes never heard from her before.

It probably helps that shes already aroused, but she cums very quickly, and when he sits up to grin at her she laughs, breathlessly.

Oh, God, Merlin.

First orgasm of the new year, he tells her, matter-of-factly, serious business.

She snorts. Come here.

She proceeds to kiss him very thoroughly, and he realises that shes licking her fluids off his face, which he finds somewhere between bizarre and arousing. Nestled against her a few minutes later, with his cheek on her breast, as she idly strokes his hair, he thinks that hed really like to fuck her again and then go down on her again. And then

He idly flicks a thumb over one of her nipples watches the bud harden a little. Its never going to stop intriguing him, the way her body reacts to being touched.

Merlin? Shes still stroking his hair.

Mm?

You can stay if you want, she pauses, takes a breath. I dont think Arthurs going to miss you, somehow.

Yeah, Merlin allows his brow to furrow, was I imagining him and Gwen snogging on the kitchen table earlier, or did you see that?

I thought she hated him?

She does. He keeps staring at her breasts.

Hm, Morgana tweaks one of his ears affectionately, well, weirder things have happened than a girl snogging some bloke she doesnt
like.

I suppose. He kisses her breast her collar bone.

Do you want to stay? She asks she sounds perhaps just a little vulnerable her hand has stilled on the back of his neck.

When have I wanted to get away from you like ever?

Merlin is woken up, briefly, at eight the next morning, by the sound of his phone chiming in response to a text. He grimaces in his sleep, bats at his eyes without opening them, and when the sound stops, he drifts soundly back into sleep again, absently huddling closer to Morgana, who doesnt stir.

Approximately an hour later, the phone rings and doesnt stop, and Merlin sits up, disturbed. His mouth is dry and his head aches a little and mostly hes just confused by his surroundings and the manner of his awakening. For a moment, he fails to comprehend where exactly the sound is coming from.

Morgana rolls over and buries her head in the pillows, moaning softly.

Trying to think in a straight line, Merlin untangles himself from the duvet and slides onto the floor, fumbling through the pockets of his jeans until he finds the ringing phone. He squints at the screen to try to work out who in their right mind would be trying to call him at such an ungodly hour on new years day.

Lo? He manages.

Merlin! His uncle sounds peeved, you didnt answer my text message!

Oh, Merlin replies, a little dumbly. He has sat down on the floor, in a pool of his cast off clothes, feeling very cold without the duvet.
The room is dim, daylight only just fighting its way through Morganas curtains. Sorry.

We have an agreement! Gaius insists, you must always answer my text messages, Merlin, so that I know where you are!

I was asleep, Merlin tells him, rubbing his eyes.

Well, where are you? Gaius demands, shortly.

Merlin sighs, at the Pendragons I slept over.

With that girlfriend of yours? Gaius is immediately suspicious, Ive no objection to you having sexual intercourse, Merlin, but I hope
you used protection

Yes yes I know its fine, Gaius um

Is she on the pill? Id recommend it if youre regularly having penetrative sex, you know condoms are the best defence against
disease but they can break and you dont want her getting pregnant

Yeah thanks, Gaius Im um Im gonna be home sometime mid-afternoon, probably, okay? So um see you later

At the very least you must always use spermicide with the condom!

Bye, Gaius.

He hangs up, then spends a moment staring blearily at his phone, wondering whether he really did just have the conversation he thinks he did.

Hes not going to think about it. ________________________________________

____

Do you have to go? Morgana enquires, sleepily, as he climbs back into the bed. She props herself up with one hand and pushes a
curtain of thick dark hair out of her face with the other her smile is drowsy but warm and she looks so so

Merlin shakes his head. No, it was just Gaius being Gaius-like. Im fine here for a while.

Mm, good, Morgana sighs, then leans over to kiss him, good morning, Merlin. Good morning, he replies, softly.

He curls himself around her like a plant, her back pressed his chest, his legs tangling through hers, nosing his way along her shoulder to lay his cheek in the crook of her neck.

God youve got a lot of hair.

You hadnt noticed?

Well, Ive never been in a position where Im having to actually inhale it before.

She laughs finds his hand and squeezes. This is a nice way to wake up, Merlin.

It kind of is, isnt it?

He can feel the way the muscles in her neck taughten a little when she smiles. He kisses her cheek and decides he likes the way her neck smells.

Sleep comes back almost immediately, and Merlin doses, quite warm and comfortable. They had sex twice more the previous night well hes not sure if the last time counts. She sucked him off does that count as sex? Its a sexual act, is what Gaius would say. Except that he really doesnt want to connect Gaius in any size shape or form to this particular situation. But the point is that hes tired.

An undetermined amount of time later, Morgana starts to fidget and Merlin wakes up properly. He rolls onto his back, rubbing his eyes, what time is it?

God knows, Morgana waves a hand, here kiss me.

Merlin does over and over as Morgana lies on her back against the pillows whilst Merlin covers and caresses her. Hes about to ask if she wants to have sex again when Arthurs voice outside the door interrupts them.

Morgana, have you seen my

The door comes open before Merlin can even think about what exactly is about to happen, let alone throw himself off the bed in an attempt to make it look less like hes lying naked on top of Arthurs equally naked older sister.

There is a moment in which all three of them contemplate each other. Arthur in the doorway, in a pair of pyjama bottoms and a dressing gown, hair askew, knuckles whitening on the doorknob, eyes popping wide enough to spit in with reasonable accuracy; Morgana and Merlin in the bed, still naked, still clearly rather intimately entwined.

And then Arthur looks very much as if hes going to be sick.

Oh, Christ.

Um Merlin cant manage anything more coherent as he sits up, abruptly trying to shield himself with the duvet.

Arthur theres a note of warning in Morganas voice but its too late.

Arthur is across the room in two bounds and dragging Merlin off the bed with terrifying force: I am going to fucking kill you -

Arthur! Morgana scrambles after them snatches up a shirt from the floor and drags it on over her head as Merlin wrenches free of
Arthurs grip and dives under the bed.

Come here you little

Arthur, leave him alone!

Get out from under there!

Arthur!

Ill kill you! Ill fucking kill you!

Merlin rolls out from one side of the bed as Arthur dives under the other grabs his jeans and phone and bolts for the open door.

Get back here you arsehole! Arthur chases him into the hall Merlin, staggering into his jeans, tears along the corridor, gets to the
main staircase and takes them three a time, tripping over his own feet and sprawling on the marble floor at the bottom. He hears a clunk and a sickening crack and then tastes blood which he has no time to contemplate because Arthur is suddenly on top of him and swinging a fist.

Weasely little prick

Arthur James Pendragon get off my boyfriend! Out of nowhere, and, mercifully, before Arthur can deliver the promised punch,
Morgana slams into her brother from the behind, performing an impressive side-tackle to knock him off his victim and send him crashing to the floor. She proceeds to sit on his chest and deliver him an almighty slap. What the fuck do you think youre doing?

Arthur looks a little shocked by this particular turn of events his cheek has a bright red hand-shaped mark appearing on it and for a moment he seems dazed.

Morgana takes a hold of the front of his dressing gown and glares at him. Stay down, or I swear to God Ill show Uther every one of your kinky porn mags.

I dont have any kinky porn mags! Arthur splutters.

Yeah, but I do, Morgana delivers a sharp poke to his shoulder, and whos he going to believe they belong to, mm?

Arthur grimaces but doesnt protest further as Morgana climbs off him and goes to where Merlin is clutching the lip he split open on the floor. Her hands are cool as she cups his chin to inspect the damage with a critical eye. Did he do this to you?

Mm-mm, Merlin shakes his head.

Clumsy lout tripped over his own feet, Arthur informs her, coldly, from his back on the floor.

Shut up, Morgana doesnt look at him. Come on, Merlin. Ill get you some ice.

Merlin nods, feeling like a little kid as she stands up and he takes her hand, allowing himself to be led towards the kitchen, which still looks like a bomb (or a few hundred drunk party-goers) hit it the night before.

Hey! Arthur yells, from the hall, what about me?

Stay there! Morgana orders.

Ice located in the freezer, wrapped in a clean dish cloth, and tenderly applied to Merlins lip, Morgana leads him back into the hall. And then they both sit down on the bottom step of the mansions main staircase, and contemplate Arthur, who glares back at them from the floor.

You have kinky porn mags? Merlin asks, abruptly.

Morgana giggles, oh, theres so much more Ive got to teach you, sweetheart.

Merlin has time to grin before Arthur groans.

For Gods sake! Im right here!

You dragged him out of bed naked and then caused him to split his lip open! Morgana snaps, you dont get to talk for a while!

Arthur sits up, eyes narrowing as he scrutinises the pair of them. This has happened before.

I have never slept with any of your other friends, Morgana rolls her eyes.

No! I mean Arthur gesticulates at them wildly for a moment, youve last night wasnt a one off, was it?

Morgana folds her arms but stays stubbornly silent. Merlin decides that hed really rather not draw any more attention to himself than absolutely necessary.

How many times

I am absolutely not giving you a number. Morgana informs him, tartly.

How long, then? Arthur demands, how long have you two been at it?
Merlin catches Morganas eye and he realises shes waiting for his permission to say something. He shrugs.

Its been maybe three months, Morgana tells her brother, after a little consideration.

Oh my God, Arthur rolls his eyes, three months? Seriously? And you couldnt be bothered to tell me?!

It was none of your business! Morgana snaps, youre such a caveman, Arthur! Im older than you! And even if I wasnt, Im still over
sixteen! At that juncture I can choose to have sex with whoever I want!

And you wanted Merlin?

Hey! Merlin is a little peeved at his friends incredulous tone.

Hes interesting, Morgana tells Arthur, firmly. She gives Merlins wrist a gentle squeeze, and he suddenly wants very much to be back
in bed with her, with Arthur nowhere in sight.

Perhaps the touch lingers a little longer than is strictly necessary, but suddenly Arthur has a very strange expression on his face.

Youre not even its not just sex, is it? His brows knit he looks very much as if hes struggling to process something infinitely
complicated, like astrophysics or how to make the library photocopier print on both sides of a sheet of paper, Youre not just sleeping together have you been I mean, are you, like, going out, or something? Is Merlin your boyfriend?

Morgana suddenly looks uncomfortable. We havent really talked about it.

You called him your boyfriend, Arthur points out, when you assaulted me. No one assaulted you!

Hah! Arthur spits, then frowns again, and stop trying to change the subject. You called him your boyfriend.

Did I? Morgana looks momentarily confused.

Merlin pretends that he doesnt remember that he wasnt, in the middle of feeling great pain and great fear and great astonishment, suddenly unreasonably happy at the idea as Morgana had been wrestling her brother off him. He shrugs, noncommittally.

Well, we havent really talked about it, anyway, Morgana looks back at Arthur.

You havent three months and you havent had the talk? Arthur looks disbelieving, god, you two are worse than I am.

Oh, I am really not discussing this with you, Morgana informs him.

And what were you getting up to with Gwen last night, anyway? Merlin asks, suddenly remembering, werent you two trying to suck
each others faces off in the kitchen? For a moment, he gets the distinct impression that Arthur is blushing.

Although that may just be a trick of the light.

We were drunk, is all he says, a little stiffly. And then he gets up, yawning and running a hand through his hair, dunno about you
guys, but Im starving. Going to fry some bacon. Want some?

Merlin blinks. thats it?

What? Arthur asks, distractedly.

You were trying to kill me ten minutes ago!

Arthur shrugs. And now Im hungry. He turns and pads away towards the kitchen, calling back over his shoulder, you could have told me earlier, you know. I would have been cool with it.

Before or after you tried to kill me?!

After, obviously.
Morgana, perhaps for the first time since Merlin has met her, looks confused.

Merlin squeezes her hand. There is actually a reason I like the guy.

Clearly, Morgana shakes her head.

They go back to her room. Morgana stretches out on her bed and Merlin kicks off his jeans before climbing back in beside her she gently kisses his split lip.

My poor baby.

He shakes his head, I tripped and collided with a marble floor can we just tell everyone that Arthur hit me? I think Id come off more manly that way.

Secrets safe with me, she promises, and her lips twitch, although she manages not to laugh.

They are quiet for a moment. Merlin sighs against the shirt Morgana is wearing and buries his face in the material over her ribs it smells of her sweat and her perfume and faintly of beer. She is warm and real beneath it and he thinks that really, truly, this is what love must feel like. Like the dull throbbing of a split lip and the ache of a hangover close against the back of his skull and the taste of her still on the back of his tongue, and not caring at all because she called him her boyfriend.

Arthur knows and now there are few people of consequence left to tell, and if everyone knows, and if Morgana called him her boyfriend, is she his girlfriend?

He doesnt ask. He doesnt dare.

She is tracing circles on the back of his neck with a finger tip.

Merlin?

Mm?

You dont want to sleep with anyone else, do you?

What? Merlin lifts his head up, no who else would I why?

I like to know these things, she tells him, matter-of-factly. You dont, then?

Want to sleep with anybody else? No, Merlin assures her.

Good, me either. She pats her shoulder, which Merlin takes as an invitation to lay his head there.

He thinks shes saying were exclusive now. Does that make her my girlfriend?

Morgana! Merlin! Do you guys actually want some of this bacon? Arthurs voice comes up from the floor below hes probably
standing on the stairs.

Were okay! Morgana calls back.

What?

I said were okay! Morgana repeats, obligingly covering Merlins ears before she shouts.

Oh okay, Arthur shouts, then, after a moment adds, remember to use protection, alright?

Oh god, Merlin groans, and Morgana giggles into his hair.

Were okay, she repeats to him, softly, and he nods, even as his ears get hot.

But she grins at him, and Merlin reckons everythings going to be brilliant for a while.