Understanding Bullying and Creating a Caring School Community

By Ma. Lourdes A. Carandang, Ph.D.

Bullying and the Culture of Intimidation

Home School National International

To develop a comprehensive program, We must start with a deeper understanding of bullying.

What is a BULLY?
noun - someone who uses their strength or power to frighten or hurt someone who is weaker verb - to bully is to threaten or hurt someone or frighten them, especially someone who is smaller or weaker

Keyword is POWER POWER OVER (erodes the spirit) VS. PERSONAL POWER (nourishes the spirit)

Situate in cultural context: SOCIETY, MEDIA, SCHOOL , FAMILY Underneath: feelings of powerlessness and low self-esteem

BULLYING IS A SYSTEM:

The BULLY The BULLIED The BYSTANDER * The Bystander MUST INTERVENE.

4 Markers of Bullying
1. 2. 3. 4. Imbalance of power Intent to harm Threat of further aggression Terror

Kinds of Bullying
1. Physical - hitting, punching, etc. 2. Verbal - name-calling, threatening, cruel teasing 3. Social (or relational) - excluding, alienating, etc. 4. Cyber-bullying - use of internet, (also verbal and emotional)
*All have EMOTIONAL EFFECTS

Children must be safe in school. It is their need and their right to feel safe and cared for. How do we build a caring school environment?

Possible Activities for Discussion with Principals,Teachers and Guidance Counselors

1. Foster AWARENESS and UNDERSTANDING of the bullying system and dynamics of Bullying among students, teachers, others school personnel and parents. Do survey among students. Their views about bullying. DISCUSSION - consolidate findings to formulate antibullying program, Bullying as a System. Create CIRCLES OF CARING- a community of caring. Have a POLICY-of kind of sanction and rewards, bullying vs. caring, what to do when bullied. Etc.

2. 3.

4. 5.

6. Make sure POLICY is clearly understood disseminated to all concerned.-Students, teachers, school personnel and parents. 7. Have base line measure - and evaluation of program after 1 semester or quarter? Set time frame. .. 8. Document so that the school program can be modified, improved and sustained. 9. Build Interschool support system for updating strengthening and sustaining.

A Basic Framework

7 BASIC PSYCHOLOGICAL NEEDS

1. PERSONAL SIGNIFICANCE I matter.

I make a difference.

I am not a non-entity.

2. AFFECTION, UNCONDITIONAL ACCEPTANCE, BASIC TRUST

We need to be accepted as we are.

We need affirmation, and a sense of security.

3. CLEAR AND CONSISTENT LIMITS

We need to know our limits when to say NO.

to know when to take a break

4. SENSE OF COMPETENCE
I can vs. I cant I am good at something. need to develop area of competence sense of power vs. helplessness

5. AFFILIATION
Need to be connected, to belong, to have a support group, to have real friends.

6. WIDE SCOPE OF SELF-EXPRESSION Need to have various avenues to express self and emotions through play, art, music, writing, sports, dance, drama.

7. TRANSCENDENCE
Need to look beyond what is there. To have faith and hope that things will get better.

A Basic Framework

7 BASIC PSYCHOLOGICAL NEEDS