SSYM5223 Adolescent Psychology

PREMARITAL SEX AMONG TEENAGERS

1.

INTRODUCTION

Being a teen is seldom easy. Teens are faced with very important and difficult decisions. One of situation in making a decision is having a sex or not with their boyfriend. Teenagers often dont know as much about sex and sexuality as you might think. Most teenagers get information from their friends, books, magazines, TV or the Internet. The most influence make teenagers drop into this sex zone is their peer friends. Like people always said, children may trust their friends than their own parents. What their friend have saying about social life is always right than viewing from their own parents. This is because friends are more understand about what we want than parents that always dispute or argue on what they are doing. They may doing or follow whatever their friends did than what parents want. Being a friend with this group certainly will ruin their own life. The Ethical Theory of Immanuel Kant According on the ethical theory of Immanuel Kant, Human love is good-will, affection, promoting the happiness of others and finding joy in their happiness. But it is clear, that when a person loves another purely for sexual desires, none of these factors enter into the love. Some think, including Kant, that love becomes a different love when a sexual desire is involved. Kant compares sex to a person appetite for food. He says when someone is trying to feed their sexual desires they put aside the feelings of the person they are devouring. When someones sexual appetite is satisfied the person they used for personal sexual satisfaction is discarded. That what was happen to my respondent, she was left by her boyfriend after they done a sex for several times. He leaves her without told a reason why he doing it. It is really

SSYM5223 Adolescent Psychology

like just a food, when they hungry and want to eat they will ask for it and the person that serve a food has to fulfil. Social Cognitive Theory On SCT, there is a framework with three components, personal factors, environments, and behaviour, which can affect one to another. In addition, personal factors that have been influenced by environments will affect someones behaviour or vice versa (Ronny, 2007; Baranowski et al, 2006). The interventions of personal factors of cognitive, affective and biological events in behaviour influence someone thinking and practicing. The stage of self-control, observational learning, reinforcement, self-efficacy and emotional coping responses of person lead them to outcomes of behaviour. Environmental factors, such as family members, friends and mass media, can affect individual behaviour and create person perceptions (Ronny, 2007; Baranowski et al, 2006). Personal factors as in-school late adolescents knowledge, attitude, relationship status, and behaviours can influence them on having premarital sexual intercourse while individual characteristics as the environment factors that control them. (Ronny, 2007).

SSYM5223 Adolescent Psychology

2.

STUDY CASE

My respondent is a female and she is 16 years old. She is the youngest of two siblings and her sister had married. She lives with her father and her mother died two years ago. She had dropped out of school while in form two. Now, she just stays at home without doing anything. Four months ago, she worked as a cashier at petrol station. Respondent has a problem when she was in 14 years old. On that age, she started doing a sex with her boyfriend. This is happens after her mother died because of stroke. She said she felt like lost everything when her mother died. She lost a place to rely on when she has a problem. Because she is not to close with her father, she found other ways to rely on. Respondent didnt want to burden her sister because she is already married. She knew her boyfriend through her good friend. On that time, she already dropped out from school and her family doesnt know it. Her father was not always at home, so he didnt know whether his daughter went to school or not. When her father went out for work or something she decided to stay at home. But when her father was at home, she pretended like she goes to school but the truth is went to somewhere. She also run out from house at every night and met her good friend at a place near her house. After a few days, her friend introduced her to someone. There are two boys she met. But she interested with one of them and they start met, chat and then change the number phone with each others. The boy just 19 years old and he worked. They closed when her father found out about she dropped out of school. Her father mad on her and they always argued about it until she felt stress and tension. These make her used that boys as a place to express her sadness. She said her boyfriend make her calm down and he will always be with her no matter what will happen. It makes her feel loved and safe when he is beside her. On that time, she commit her good life

SSYM5223 Adolescent Psychology

is like turn back to her. She has someone to share her feeling, gave her happiness all the time and makes her felt someone special. After two months they knew each other, there are something happened to them. She said her boyfriend start asked about her feeling to him. She said that she really in love want him to be her side always. But he never trusted it and said she just used him to fill her emptiness. He wanted her to prove it with doing sex. For the first times, she refused it and said it is a sin if they doing it. He upset and disappointed with her answer and accused that actually she didnt love him. They argued for a few days because of it and didnt contact to each others. When she felt lonely, she decided to call him back and said she will do anything as long as he didnt leave her. She said it because she really loves him and whatever that boy want it she will be fulfilled. Through his voice, he seems really happy with what respondent said. Then, he contacts her and said they will meet later on. She waited for his called and after her boyfriend done his works, he took her to his house. She said there is no one at his house because all his friends went back to their hometown. They had sex for the first time at his house. It does not stop there, it happen again after a few days when he called her and ask for it more. She refused it and said it just enough for once and never want to do it anymore. Her boyfriend disappointed and said that she doesnt love him anymore and she has someone else. Because of scared to lose her boyfriend, she agreed with his requested. They met again and he took her to budget hotel and had sex in there. She said they had sex more than three or four times within two months. Through her story, after two months they are split up and lose contact with her. Before he left he just gave a reason that he have a lot of work to do and one of his family is sick. He has gone back to

SSYM5223 Adolescent Psychology

hometown for take care his family. He promised that he will contact her after he settles his problem. Badly, he lied and gone for no reason and never comes out until now. She doesnt waiting for him and took other ways with find another boy. The reason why she doing it because she said she got into addicted to have a sex. She cant stand for not doing it. So, she started find other boys and they had a sex. She had a sex with different boys. Then, her family known about it and she was beaten by her father. She run out from home and stayed with her good friend because she felt stress and lonely. She has no one to talk and express disappointed about her feeling. But, her father doesnt like her friend because he assuming that she is the one who taught her daughter to get into this wrong way. She said within had a sex she actually release her tension about her addicting. But not all of boys she met had a sex with her. Sometimes, she just had a sex when some of boys that rewarding her with something such as money, new hand phone, clothes, or else. She said last time she had a sex is a few months ago. And she doesnt want to do it anymore and try to avoid it. She said she still young and has a lot thing to do. It is because she realizes that the life she had face is not a good and can result her into ruining her own life. She decide she want do something that give benefit to her own life. Though she did not finished her education, but she still has a chance to develop herself through participation in programme provided by the government for youth.

SSYM5223 Adolescent Psychology

3.

LITERATURE REVIEW

Adolescence, between 13 and 19 years, is marked by the maturation of physical and psychological characteristics. Adolescents are neither children nor adults and during the period of transition from childhood to adulthood, seek to establish their identity. Adolescents are not children because their bodies are physically developing into adult bodies and they begin to socialise more with their peers and rely on information obtained from their peers as opposed to that provided by parents. This is done in an effort to gain independence from parents and acceptance by their peers. Premarital sex is sexual intercourse engaged in by persons who are not married to each other (Kintu, 2011; Thomson, 1938). It is generally used in reference to individuals who are presumed not yet of marriageable age, or between adults who will presumably marry eventually, but who are engaging in sexual activity prior to marriage (Ramesh, 2008). In many cultures in Asia, premarital sex is banned to prevent unwanted pregnancy in women while in India premarital sex is culturally wrong, but recently it was legalized by the Supreme Court due to the influence of the western culture (Kintu, 2011; Perkins et al, 1998). Premarital sex is sex before marriage and it is generally found among the youths. It involves fornication, rape, defilement and incest. The causes behind it have been established including curiosity among the youth, proof of manhood, lust, pornography and its adverse effects, insanity and sex promiscuity as well as moral decadence among the youths (Kintu, 2011; Choe et al, 2004). Many studies have found that having boyfriend and girlfriend will lead to have a potential of dating violence. Dating violence itself is related to negative outcomes and behaviour such as premarital sexual activities. Moreover, girls were more likely reported to

SSYM5223 Adolescent Psychology

get violence and psychological aggression perpetration within relationship (Kintu, 2011; Swhan et al, 2008). Hammer and Banegas (2010:290) state that a commonly cited reason for initiating sexual relations among adolescents was pressure from society and their peers. In their quest for a sense of belonging and to avoid rejection by the group the adolescents succumb to this pressure. When adolescents perceive that their friends of similar age are engaging in risky sex, this perception is likely to foster the same behaviour in them. Conversely, perceived peer norms that are supportive of sexual protective behaviours may influence adolescents to adopt and maintain safer sex. Peers pressure has motivated them to have premarital sexual. Moreover, peers play important role in making someones personality, attitudes and behaviour. Further research has shown that individual behaviour get influence from peer behaviour and it commonly happens in adolescents and adolescents (Ronny, 2007; Cernada et al, 1986). On the other hand, a study in Thailand found that peers are of a minor influence as far as sexual behaviour is concerned. Furthermore, if peers influence doubled with lack of control over entertainment places and easy access to porn media, adolescent may feel encouraged involving in sex at an early age (Ronny, 2007; Podhisita, 2009). Ramesh (2008) founded that peers behaviours has a positive effect on prevalence of premarital sex. In his study he found that those students whose close friends had premarital sexual experience had also very high level of premarital sex. In this, he concluded that regarding peer sexual behaviour, prevalence of premarital sex is far higher for those who had close unmarried friends with sexual experience. Besides, Dittus and Jaccard, (2000) found that perceived maternal disapproval of premarital sex, together with satisfaction with the mother-child relationship, was significantly
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SSYM5223 Adolescent Psychology

related to abstinence from adolescent sexual activity and to less frequent sexual intercourse and more consistent use of contraceptives among sexually active youth (Kintu, 2011; Widmer, 1997).

4.

METHODOLOGY

Information required for the study case was collected from interviews to the respondent. Appointments were made to the actual date of interviews which enabled the respondents to prepare in advance. All information has been recorded and translated into forms of dialogue. I chose respondent as the case because it fits with social problems among teenagers nowadays. I get respondent through a friend of my cousin and she helped me to contact the respondents sister. She told the respondent that I want to do interviews on her and respondent agreed to be interviewed. The interview session was performed at 11 am on November 6, 2012 at the respondents home. During the interview held her father not at home. She was not accompanied by anybody and interview session lasted only involves the two of us. Besides, addition of information is also available from respondents sister through telephone based on a few questions about respondent. Respondent has provided good cooperation during interviews conducted. She answered clearly on each question that I asked.

SSYM5223 Adolescent Psychology

5.

SUMMARY

The purpose of this study was to find out why respondent has be one of teenagers that involved into this premarital sex. Subject of this study is female teenager, she is 16 years old, single, just drop out of school while in form two. Her mother died two years ago and now she living with her father. She involved in premarital sex after her mother died. It happen when she met a boy that 5 years old than her. Started from that moment she addicted to sex and had it with different boys. But now she just stops it for a few months ago. She wants to live in a good way and having a better life. At last in interviewed, she hope others friend or whoever that have situation like her dont easily do something that ruining own life. She agreed that there must be something that can support someone like her. Dont just blame what is individual did wrong. But find what the factors that make individual get into this way.

SSYM5223 Adolescent Psychology

6.

CONCLUSIONS AND RECOMMENDATIONS

Peers behaviours have a positive effect on prevalence of premarital sex. Where peers engage in sexual activities, it is most likely that even all those who join such groups will be taken up to practice the same so as to identify with the group. Furthermore, youth whose close friends who have premarital sexual experiences, have a high level of premarital sex exposure therefore, peers can influence others to engage into such acts. Continuous counselling of the teenagers about engaging in sex before marriage was found as an alternative to behavioural which would help youth to avoid in premarital sex. Parents who are always to talk to their children especially regarding sexual relationships would make them grow up knowing about sexual activities and when advances are made, such things are not new and thus can avoid premarital sex happen. Actually there should be approval and monitoring of the peer groupings among the teenagers so as to check on the activities that teenagers engage in especially as a result of pressure emerging from the peer.

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SSYM5223 Adolescent Psychology

REFERENCES

Dittus P., Jacard J., (2000). Adolescents perceptions of maternal disapproval of sex: relationship to sexual outcomes. Journal of Adolescent Health. James Fieser, (2008). Sex From Moral Issues that Divide Us. Achieved from www.utm.edu/staff/jfieser/class/160/2-sex.htm on November 18, 2012. Kintu J, (2011). Causes And Characteristics Of Pre-Marital Sex Among The Youths Of Madudu Subcounty, Mubende District. Ramesh A, (2008). Factors Affecting Pre-marital Sex among Male College Students of Kathmandu, Mahendra Ratna Campus, Tribhuwan University Kathmandu Nepal. Ronny A. P., (2007). Factors Influencing Premarital Sexual Intercourse Among Adolescents In Indonesia: A Case Study Among In-School Late Adolescents From Indonesian Young Adult Reproductive Health Survey.

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