NATIONALS

ENQUIRER “Enquiring Swimmers Want to Know”

AUGUST 5, 2008

Meet Director “BD” (Brandon
Drawz) empties pool instead of
filling it. Claims idea came to
him during Edgefield happy
hour. Our reporter investigating.
Meet Director “BD” unmasked
as mirror-image twin of the other
Meet Director , “DB” (Dennis
Baker). (For uncanny
resemblance, see picture below).
Six-foot sturgeon found in 50-
meter pool, and immediately
DQ’d by BD for using flotation
device not approved by FINA.
Rules Committee in heated dispute
over which swim aids will be allowed
in competition. Pre-meet swim-off
between meet directors will settle
controversy.

I’M GOING TO
ALLOW
SWIMMERS WHO
CAN’T AFFORD IN A PIG’S
A SPEEDO LZR BUTT YOU
RACER OR A WILL.
BLUESEVENTY
TO USE FINS IN
SHORTER
EVENTS.
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NATIONALS ENQUIRER AUGUST 5, 2008

Inside This Issue

Meet Announcements-----------3
Editorial Erudition
(Readers’ Survey) --------------4
Coaches Corner------------------8
Technical Tools----------------10
Participant Profiles------------15
Oregon Trail
Over the Barrel,
Under the Barrel------------17
Swim Fans’ Forum------------21
In the Next Edition-----------23

What coaching advice should we have listened

to months ago? What's the latest poolside
gossip? What's the inside scoop behind
yesterday’s record swims? Enquiring
swimmers want to know. The infamous
Nationals Enquirer has dispatched its intrepid
reporter to churn out copy for these hard-to-put-
down, photo-filled pages. Old news, rehashed,
performance enhancement breakthroughs
explained, the unavoidable serious article about
competing in our sport, and real-life human-
interest stories are all here. Look for updates ,
every day of the meet, and then some. Don't
miss a single lurid issue!
Pre-meet issues available exclusively on-line; limited numbers of
abbreviated meet issues available in print at the Aquatic Center.
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NATIONALS ENQUIRER AUGUST 5, 2008

Important!
Notices & Corrections
Heads up, Swimmers:

• Correction: Warm Ups Thursday

through Sunday will start at 6:30
AM and end at 7:20 AM.
Competition will start promptly at
7:30 AM. The 25-yard indoor
warm-up pool will open at 7:20
AM and remain available as stated
in the Meet Information.
• Day Tripper Alert!! The Steel
Bridge in Portland will be closed to
cars, buses and MAX trains August
2-24, 2008, as crews connect
existing tracks to the new MAX
Green Line tracks on 5th and 6th
avenues. Shuttle buses will be
carrying MAX riders across the
river between the Old
Town/Chinatown Station and the
Rose Quarter/Convention Center
stations, via the Burnside Bridge.
The lower deck of the Steel Bridge
will remain open to bikes and
pedestrians. You may wish to
consider this closure when
planning your visit to Portland
using MAX and the Day Tripper
Numbers 2 and 3 included in the
first issue of the Nationals
Enquirer.
This inspirational poster, featuring
11,239-foot Mt. Hood rising out of the
Aquatic Center pool, will be available
for purchase during the meet for $5
each. Numbers will be limited. The
Multnomah tribe’s name for Mount
Hood is Wy'east. Legend says the name
comes from a Multnomah chief who
competed for the attention of a woman
with a chief of the Klickitat tribe. The
anger that the competition generated led
to their transformation into volcanoes,
with the Klickitat chief becoming
nearby Mt. Adams and the target of their
affection becoming Mt. St. Helens.
Their battle was said to have destroyed
the Bridge of the Gods and thus created
the Great Cascades of the Columbia
River. Beware the consequences of
fierce competition in these parts!

WARNING:
This publication (if you want to call it that) is not the official, or any, communication of USMS, OMS, Mt.
Hood Community College, or any other responsible organization, nor is it a communication attributable to
the Meet Directors, who are men of few words (but mighty deeds in most situations). This publication is
intended solely as entertainment by athletes, for athletes. The opinions expressed by the editors and
contributors are entirely their own, God help them.
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NATIONALS ENQUIRER AUGUST 5, 2008

EDITORIAL ERUDITION

TO SUIT OR NOT TO SUIT –

LET’S KEEP AN OPEN MIND ON THE

NEW RACING SUITS
Judging by news sources, swimming blogs, and the
high volume of traffic in swimmer discussion
forums, the most burning issue for 2008 is the new
swimsuit technology. Three questions seem to be
on everyone’s mind: (1) whether the world records
thus far in 2008 are attributable to advances in
training, or to a new generation of swimsuit, (2)
whether the new swimsuits constitute “tech doping,”
and (3) whether an aging masters swimmer can get
his hands on a new “swimskin” suit, given that most
of the world’s inventory has been shipped to
Beijing. Rather than give our own views about the
controversy surrounding the new swimsuits, we
thought it would be more useful to solicit YOUR
OPINIONS with the following questionnaire,
prepared by our staff with the highest concern for
journalistic standards of objectivity and impartiality:
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NATIONALS ENQUIRER AUGUST 5, 2008

TO SUIT OR NOT TO SUIT, CONTINUED

Question No. 1: Which company had the most influence on the
design & development of Speedo’s LZR Racer bodysuit?
A. NASA.
B. Speedo.
C. Marquis de Sade Industries.
D. BF Goodrich.
E. Hebrew National Weiner Company.

Question No. 2: When I see my workout partner in one of

the new suits, I think he is:
A. Michael Phelps.
B. Kornelia Ender.
C. Richer than I am.
D. The Michelin Man.
E. The Hindenburg.

Question No. 3: When I see my workout partner actually

swimming in one of the new full body suits, I think he is:
A. Faster than I am.
B. Ryan Lochte.
C. Charlie the Tuna.
D. Das Bot.
E. Cheating.

Question No. 4: When I see my workout partner beat me at Nationals in his new swimskin, I want
to:
A. Stick a pin in his body suit and watch him spin around like a deflating balloon.
B. Set fire to his body suit and watch him melt like the witch in the Wizard of Oz.
C. Steal his body suit and make him swim in that rag of a Speedo I have to wear.
D. Quit.
E. Slash the tires of his Humvee.

Question No 5: When my workout partner is not swimming in his new swimskin, he can be found:
A. Polishing the chrome wheels on his pathetic looking Corvette, which barely runs.
B. Wishing he were me.
C. Riding around on the bitch seat of a chopper pitching beer cans at cows.
D. Telemarketing chain letters.
E. Putting out lawn signs for Ralph Nader (still).

Question No. 6: The main disadvantage of using a new swimskin suit is:
A. You can’t pick up chicks while wearing it.
B. You can’t pick up guys while wearing it.
C. Even if you could pick them up, you couldn’t do anything with them while wearing it.
D. Even if you could do something with them, afterwards they’d probably like the suit better than
they like you.
E. All of the above.
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NATIONALS ENQUIRER AUGUST 5, 2008

TO SUIT OR NOT TO SUIT, CONTINUED

Question No. 7: The person who looks the stupidest in a new swimskin suit is:
A. My nemesis.
B. Jon Naber.
C. An age-group swimmer.
D. Dubya.
E. They guy who just swam 3rd in the US Olympic Trials.

Question No. 8: The swimsuits were invented for people who:

A. Can’t float.
B. Reminisce for the “good old days” when girdles were in fashion.
C. Like the triple-chin look they get by pushing all that flesh
northward.
D. Are suffering from tri-athlete equipment envy.
E. Think Roger Clemens is a national hero.

Question No. 9: To be fair to other swimmers, people who compete in the

new suits should have to:
A. Go skiing in the suit.
B. Wear the suit to the Socials at Nationals.
C. Have themselves filmed getting into the suit, and post the results on
YouTube.
D. Have former Senator Larry Craig help them out of the suit.
E. Go through airport security in the suit.

Question No. 10: When my husband wears the full body suit, he looks like:
A. One of the guys at Jiffy Lube.
B. Edward Norton as the Incredible Hulk.
C. Something from the Prehistory Wing of the Natural History Museum.
D. Dara Torres.
E. A coke machine.

Question No. 11: Even though I don’t like the concept of the new
swimskin suits, I would be interested in buying one of the suits if it
included:
A. Integrated fins and paddles.
B. Different colors, like mauve, or a nice pattern like glenn plaid.
C. A pocket for my Leatherman tool.
D. Feet & a hood.
E. A pisshole.

Question No. 12: People who use the new suits or tug on the lane lines
during kicking sets are referred by coaches as:
A. Shiftless.
B. Spineless.
C. Self-deluded.
D. Vexatious.
E. Cheaters.
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NATIONALS ENQUIRER AUGUST 5, 2008

TO SUIT OR NOT TO SUIT, CONTINUED

Question No. 13: If the new suits had a patron saint, it would be:
A. Saint Thomas Aquinas.
B. Saint Adjutor.
C. Saint Sebastian.
D. Saint Dismas.
E. Judas.

Question 14: If I won $500 in the lottery, I would:

A. Buy matching I-Phones for me and my spouse.
B. Make a donation to USA Swimming’s Make a Splash
Foundation.
C. Attend a Masters Swimming Clinic.
D. Buy an Olympic Gold Medal on E-Bay.
E. Buy a Speedo LZR for my 50M Free at USMS Nationals.

Question 15: The best thing about the new full body suit is that
it allows you to go fast in competition even if you can’t:
A. Pull
B. Kick
C. Float
D. Turn
E. Swim.

PLEASE COMPLETE YOUR QUESTIONNAIRE by printing these pages and circling your
answers, then submit them to DB, BD, USMS, FINA -- or anyone but your editors.

Frank and Robin Parisi, editors, publishers and roving reporters

for The Nationals Enquirer, live and swim (but having recently
retired, do not work) in Portland, Oregon, and Kona, Hawaii.
WLL E
MAKE?
 8

NATIONALS ENQUIRER AUGUST 5, 2008

COACHES’ CORNER

Tips for Competing at Mt. Hood Aquatic Center

By Dennis Baker

Recent renovations at the Mt. Hood Community College Aquatic Center have made its 50-meter
pool one of the fastest in world. After competing many times in this facility and in championship
meets, I have some tips to help you make the best of your swims here.

Don’t stay in the sun too long. Although we are north of the
45th parallel, you can still get pretty burned this time of year.
There will be only limited tent space in the outdoor bleachers
and on the pool deck, but there are plenty of areas around the
facility that provide shade. The indoor bleachers overlooking
the warm-up pool can hold up to 250 sprawled-out swimmers.
There are also many shady lawns around and behind the pool.

Make sure you are checked in for ALL of your events. This
meet has a few differences from other meets. First, the
morning warm-up times in the competition pool have been changed. They will start at 6:30
AM everyday, and end at 7:20 AM, with racing beginning promptly at 7:30 AM. Next, all
the events 200 and longer will be deck-seeded, just like the distance events are. The 200’s
will be seeded by age and gender as usual. Make sure you don’t get caught napping: check
in for your 200’s! Officials will be posting heat sheets shortly before the deck-seeded events
begin. More information will be circulated on this as it becomes available.

Practice your turns in the competition pool during warm-up. Your depth perception is
different in every pool (the Mt. Hood pool has a tricky slope in the deep end, as you swim
toward the starting blocks). Every pool seems to have a different backstroke count from the
flags. Get comfortable with your turns in every stroke that you will swim. We are using the
bigger touch pads, so the turns will all be flat-wall, with no gutter to grab onto. And
remember, the location of the backstroke flags can vary as much as a foot between warm-ups
and your race, depending on the relative wind conditions – be alert to this both during warm-
up and in your race.
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NATIONALS ENQUIRER AUGUST 5, 2008

Bake’s Tips for Competing at Mt. Hood, continued:

Swim in the center of the lane. As with all elite long course venues, the Mt. Hood lane
ropes are large and solid. Running into them at full speed will hurt, and will add a lot of time
to your race. This can especially be a problem in backstroke. In an outdoor pool such as ours
you must sight yourself now and again during your backstroke race. This might involve
moving your head or eyes every so often during the race to see where you are, relative to the
lane rope. While this is a “NO-NO” for proper backstroke form, it will pay off in this pool. If
you run into the lane rope in backstroke you might actually stop completely (ed. note:
Although it can be difficult to distinguish between my normal backstroke speed and a
complete halt, I can personally testify that the lane ropes will stop you cold when you run
into them while swimming backstroke! FMP). Also, don’t “ride” the lane rope during your
backstroke swim. While you may think that staying right next to the line is the best way to
keep it in view, 90% of the swimmers I have witnessed trying this at the Mt. Hood pool have
smacked right into the rope. It’s worth repeating: Swim in the center of the lane!

Use the pool ladders. Do not try to get out of the pool at the wall below the starting blocks.
The tall touch pads make for very high walls without gutters. Save your shoulders and back
from tiredness and possible strains during warm-up, and make your way to the ladders on the
sides of the pool. During races, there should be ample time, after you finish, to exit the pool
at the sides. We will be doing over-the-top starts, meaning that the next heat will be started
after the last person finishes in the prior heat, but while all the prior heat swimmers are still in
the water. Just stay in your lane until the next heat has started, then duck under the lane ropes
to the ladder on the side of the pool that is closest to your
lane.

Watch your step. Lastly, during our renovation we raised

the portion of the deck immediately surrounding the pool by
3 feet. If you are on the actual pool deck make sure you
realize there is a drop off!!! Use the stairs whenever possible
for safety and to save your leg strength.

Dennis Baker, besides being one of our Meet Directors, is the

founder and head coach of Oregon Reign Masters, the masters
swimming team that calls the Aquatic Center “home.” Dennis, a
certified USA Swimming Coach, also coaches age-group swimmers
at the David Douglas Swim Club and masters swimmers at the
Multnomah Athletic Club. Dennis recently came close to achieving his goal of being
the oldest swimmer to qualify for the USA Olympic Trials, several times swimming
sub-2:05 in the 200 meter fly this summer (best time 2:04.07, a whisker short of the 2:03.99 required for Trials). Earlier in
life Dennis was a 2-time Pac-10 Conference Champion and a 2-time Olympic Trials finalist, all in the 200 fly. Find out more
about Dennis at the Oregon Reign Masters site, http://www.oregonreignmasters.org/index.htm. Dennis is pictured, above
right, with the talented and indulgent Roxanne Redwine, Social Chair for LC Nationals, and the person responsible for
planning our two great Event Socials.
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NATIONALS ENQUIRER AUGUST 5, 2008

TECHNICAL TOOLS

RACE ANALYSIS ~
A SECRET WEAPON FOR IMPROVEMENT
You have trained all year, gotten lots of sleep on the nights before your races, warmed up
well, done your stretching and hydrating just like the experts have been telling you to, and have
been avoiding the beer and fried pork rinds (well, mostly). You have been swimming your heart
out for three days. Yet try as you might, you just can’t seem to achieve the times you were
hoping for. Why not?

Maybe all that focus on technique and conditioning isn’t enough; maybe you need to step
back and look at your overall race strategy. But wait, what does the term “race strategy” mean?
Isn’t that just “don’t go out so hard that you die”? Yes, it is; but it could be so much more. Other
than collecting your splits and comparing them to the same event last season, on what data is the
coach basing his racing advice? What part of your race are you trying to improve, and what parts
should you leave well enough alone? Chances are, neither you or your coach has any actual data,
beyond lap splits, about how you swim a race, or about how you might swim it differently in
order to improve. That situation is about to change.

In the last decade, software has become available that makes it possible to collect and
analyze the training and race data most relevant to improving performance. Before the personal
computer, collecting this data on even a single swimmer was virtually impossible: data collection
for just a single race would have required four or five people concentrating on that one swimmer.
The PC, however, has revolutionized data
collection.

At USA Swimming’s 2008 Olympic

Trials, nine individuals sitting at their laptops in
the press box of the Qwest Center, one assigned to
each lane in the championship pool, were able to
input huge volumes of data for each swimmer in
each heat. They accomplished this by using a
relatively inexpensive software package called
Race Analyzer, written by Alex Nikitin (pictured
at right), an age-group coach at the Multnomah
Athletic Club in Portland Oregon, and a technical consultant to USA Swimming.
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NATIONALS ENQUIRER AUGUST 5, 2008

Race Analysis, A Secret Weapon, continued:

In real time, as each race progresses, an operator using Race Analyzer enters Cycle
Count per lap, Break Distance from starts and turns, Tempo, Breakout Time, Drop Off,
Distance Per Cycle, Pure Swimming Velocity, Free Swimming Time, Turn Time, Time
Spent Under Water, Distance Swum Under Water, 15 Meter Time/Velocity and 7.5 Meter
Race Finish Time/Velocity (a more detailed explanation of these terms appears below). At the
Trials, the team of technical consultants downloaded and integrated this data, checked an instant
replay video of the race, as necessary, for anomalies in the recorded data, and within a few
minutes of the conclusion of each event, made the data available to coaches. Each swimmer could
then meet with her coach right after cool-down, review the data and see both how that swimmer
performed with respect to her coach’s race strategy, as well as how everyone else in the event
performed.
To illustrate how Race Analyzer converts extensive and detailed race information into a
concise and informative report, below is a summary of Michael Phelps’ world record-setting 400
IM race in the 2008 Olympic Trials:
Dist Breakout, Brk Dist, Split Dropoff Cycles Time Tempo Tempo-2 Tempo-3 DPC (M/C.) Velocity, Turn Time
(sec) (M) (C/Min) (C/Min) (C/Min) (M/sec) (sec)

50 4.28 12.75 * 26.16 - 17 * 26.16 47.4 46.3 46.8 2.21 1.71 1.20

100 3.17 5.75 * 29.22 3.06 19 * 55.38 47.2 46.6 47.0 2.29 1.78 1.19

150 3.27 5.5 * 31.24 2.02 16 * 1:26.62 38.8 38.6 38.8 2.75 1.75 1.59

200 3.59 6* 30.70 -0.54 16.5 * 1:57.32 36.8 36.6 37.3 2.65 1.62 0.99

250 4.22 6.25 * 35.13 4.43 17 * 2:32.45 33.9 34.8 34.9 2.55 1.46 1.07

300 4.13 6* 36.00 0.87 19 * 3:08.45 35.9 36.4 36.4 2.37 1.43 1.27

350 1.91 3.5 * 29.48 -6.52 15 * 3:37.93 36.3 36.6 36.6 3.10 1.86 1.51

400 4.10 7.5 * 27.32 -2.16 15 * 4:05.25 37.7 38.4 39.3 2.87 1.83 -

Totals 28.66 53.25 134.5 8.83

15M Start: 5.68 sec 15M Velocity: 2.64 m/sec

This Table contains the Swimming Race Analysis of Michael Phelps’ World Record 400 IM swim at
the 2008 Olympic Trials. More information concerning the seven categories of race measurements,
and charts illustrating some of the above data, follow this article.

Now any coach at any level of competition can input that same volume of data for his
own swimmers at every meet, and can provide his swimmers detailed feedback about race
performance equal to that which previously was available only to world-class athletes. A coach
using Race Analyzer is able to identify his swimmer’s strengths and weaknesses, how those
strengths and weakness contributed to the swimmer’s splits and overall time, and how the
swimmer should modify her typical race strategy, or which components of her race she should
improve, to achieve a faster overall time.
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NATIONALS ENQUIRER AUGUST 5, 2008

Race Analysis, A Secret Weapon, continued:

Instead of relying only on a hunch that, for instance, the swimmer loses momentum on
turns, or that the swimmer’s tempo falls off as a race progresses, or that a negative split is not
typically a successful strategy in the 200, a coach can confirm those hunches with concrete data,
he can show the swimmer data from actual races, and he can discuss not just his impression of the
race, but what actually happened in the race. Further, the coach can compare the swimmer’s data
to the “optimal” race statistics reflected in data gathered for elite swimmers in major
competitions. For instance, the coach can determine how closely the swimmer’s average tempo
per lap approached the optimum tempo, or how closely the swimmer’s relative speed on each
stroke in her IM compared to the optimum relative speed for that stroke.
Of course, different swimmers have different strengths and different weaknesses, based
on body type, age, physiology, training history, and genetics, and not every swimmer can
approach the optimum on each statistical factor. For instance, if you compare the race data for
Aaron Peirsol (who swims faster than anyone on the surface and closes the last 7.5 meters faster
than anyone), with the data for Ryan Lochte (who has great walls and always gains on Peirsol
coming out of the turns), you might discover that neither has swum the optimum race on all
factors, but each has exceeded the optimum in his area of strength. Thus, Race Analyzer can
assist the coach in identifying and capitalizing on his swimmer’s strengths, as well as on
identifying and improving his swimmer’s weaknesses.
Over time, using Race Analyzer allows a coach and swimmer to compare objectively the
swimmer’s current race results with past results, and to assess whether the swimmer has
improved (and whether the training steps taken in the interim have succeeded). Race Analyzer
data can be exported to a variety of compatible formats including Rich Text for word processing,
Excel for spreadsheets, Adobe Acrobat and HTML for web-posting. Find out more about the
benefits of Race Analyzer on Alex Nikitin’s web site, www.parametrix.org.

Alex Nikitin (at left, fourth from the right) and the USA
Swimming Race Analysis Team at the 2008 Olympic Trials.
Alex has been working with swimmers at the Multnomah
Athletic Club in Portland, Oregon, since 1994. He has
coached numerous Junior National qualifiers, National Age
group Top 16 swimmers, and Western Zones, Region XII and
Oregon State record holders.
Before coming to the U.S., Alex coached for 5 years in Minsk,
Belarus where he was also a world-ranked Modern Pentathlete.
Alex graduated with Honors form Belorussian State Institute of
Physical Culture and Sport where he received his M.S. degree in
Theory Methodology of Sports Training. Alex was a coach at the
U.S.A. National Select Camps in 1999 and is a frequent speaker
on the various aspects of training design, career planning and
athlete performance tracking. Alex is an ad-hoc member of USA
Swimming National Technical Support team, and developed
Race Analyzer for the national performance-tracking program.
Alex currently serves on the Oregon Swimming Board as the
Technical Planning Chairman. In 2003, Alex was voted "Oregon
Age Group Coach of the Year". Alex qualified for and ran in the
2008 Boston Marathon.
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NATIONALS ENQUIRER AUGUST 5, 2008

RACE ANALYZER'S CATEGORIES OF RACE DATA

Breakout Time: The time (in seconds) from starting tone (start) or feet leaving the wall (turns),
to head breaking the surface.
Breakout The distance from the wall that a swimmer’s head breaks the surface, in meters
Distance: (rounded to the nearest .25 meters)
Split: Official subtractive split time for the length measured.
Drop-Off: The difference in seconds between the length measured and the preceding
length.
This is a measure of speed consistency during a race. The best races are
normally achieved with a relatively small drop-off variation. (Drop-off in
Individual Medley events looks at the race segment for each different stroke.)
Positive values indicate slower time in comparison to the previous split;
negative values indicate faster time. Swimmers should aim for the highest level
of consistency in these numbers.
A big drop-off from the first split to the second, and consecutive positive drop-
off values indicates that a swimmer started racing too fast and "died" at the end.
Big negative drop-off at the last split means that swimmer saved too much
energy during the race.
Cycle Count: Number of stroke cycles during the length (one cycle = one arm stroke for fly
and breast, and one cycle = 2 arm strokes for back and free). This number is
computed using stroke rate and actual free swimming time.
Time: Official cumulative time in the race.
Tempo/ Frequency of swimming cycles during the length measured. Expressed in both
Cycle Rate: cycles per minute (Cycle Rate), and seconds per cycle (Tempo). If you use
single arm stroke for Free/Back, divide the cycle rate by 2 to get the stroke rate.
This parameter can be used to evaluate swimming efficiency. Extremely high
Tempo (Cycle Rate) and average performance times can indicate that swimming
technique is not efficient. However, a very low Tempo (Cycle Rate) and average
performance is not good either.
DPC: "Distance per cycle" - distance covered during one stroke cycle during length
measured. DPC is an ultimate measure of swimming stroke efficiency.
Swimmers and coaches should always look for ways to improve this parameter
in their races. High values of DPC indicate available reserves for future
improvements, an "untapped" potential.
Turn Time: Time in seconds to execute the turn at the end of the length measured. Free and
Backstroke begins with hand entry on the final arm stroke and concludes with
feet contacting the wall. Fly and Breast begin with hand touch and conclude
with foot contact on the wall.
15 M Start: Time in seconds from starting tone to the 15-meter mark.
15 M Velocity: Average velocity over first 15 meters of the race.
7.5M Finish: Time in seconds from 7.5 meters remaining in the race to finish. This split
shows whether a swimmer is accelerating or decelerating at the end of the race.
7.5M Velocity: Average velocity over last 7.5 meters of the race.
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NATIONALS ENQUIRER AUGUST 5, 2008

RACE ANALYZER DATA –

MICHAEL PHELPS, US OLYMPIC TRIALS
“Phelps is known to be an extraordinarily disciplined tactician. He opens races at a sustainable pace, and his strokes
remain uniform, almost mechanically so, from beginning to end. There is nothing spontaneous, unruly or desperate
about the figure he cuts in the pool. When other swimmers, battling fatigue, begin to lapse technically, Phelps looks as if
he is swimming downhill.” Out There by Mark Levine, NY Times, August 3, 2008

400 IM – WORLD RECORD – SEE DATA CHART, PREVIOUS PAGES

Tempo over Distance Velocity over Distance

50 2.8
48 2.6 2.64
47.4 47.2 3 2
46 y = 0.0394x + 0.0729x - 5.0093x + 53.55 3 2
2 2.4 y = -0.0044x + 0.1066x - 0.7471x + 3.1363
R = 0.9061 2
44 R = 0.7697
2.2
42
2
40
38.8 1.86 1.83
1.8 1.78 1.75
38 37.7 1.71
36.8 36.3 1.6 1.62
36 35.9
1.46 1.43
34 33.9 1.4
32 1.2
30 1
50 100 150 200 250 300 350 400
15 50 100 150 200 250 300 350 400

Cycle Count over Distance Distance Per Cycle over Distance

20 3.5
19 19
3.11
3 2.93
18 18
2.74
2.66 2.6
17 17 17
2.5
16.5 2.4
16 16 2.27
2.18
15 15 2 3 2
y = 0.0091x - 0.1265x + 0.5997x + 1.6607
14.5 2
14 R = 0.6536
4 3 2
y = -0.0208x + 0.3422x - 1.911x + 3.9403x + 15.036 1.5
13 2
R = 0.5519
12 1
50 100 150 200 250 300 350 400 50 100 150 200 250 300 350 400

How Does Your Tempo Rate at 350 Meters Into the 400 IM Stack Up? How about your DPC?
 15

NATIONALS ENQUIRER AUGUST 5, 2008

PARTICIPANT PROFILES

1,130 PARTICIPANTS
WHO ARE WE?
Congratulations and thank you to Florida and Texas, each sending over 50 swimmers across the
country to compete in the USMS Long Course Nationals here in Oregon! Swimmers entered in the
meet hail from 43 of the 50 states, from the District of Columbia, and from 5 foreign countries: 28
from Canada, 4 from Switzerland, 5 from Costa Rica, 1 from Dominica and 1 from Mexico. Welcome
to Oregon! Predictably, more than half of the meet’s entrants hail from Washington, Oregon or
California. Here are the numbers, by state:

300

)
66
(2
OR
How the heck
250 am I supposed It’s alphabetical
)
30

to READ this?
(2
CA

you moron; use

your bifocals!
200

)
150
36
(1
A
W

100
2)
(6
FL

1)
(5
TX

50
8)
(3

3)
AZ

(3

9)
7)
CO

(2
(2

VA
NV
8)

6)
5)

(1

(1
5)

15
(1

2)

1)
(1
ID

H
(1
GA

N)C

(1
O)

)
IL

(9
)

(9
(8
KS

LA )

MT )
(9

MD )
MN )

)
)

PA
(7

(6
(6
(6

(6
(6

NM )

NY
MN )

UT
MO )

(5
AL )

NJ )
(5
HI
DC )

MA)

(3

W (3)
KY
(3

(3
)

TN )
AR)

(3

(3

)
(4

3
(2
)

(2

(2
(2

SC )

(2

)
(1

(2

(1
MI

Y
AK

NH
CT

IA

I
NE

W
RI

VT

You can find other swimmers in your age group, look up swimmers by name, and find
swimmers by their club affiliation, on the USMS website at:

http://www.usms.org/comp/lcnats08/heats/roster.php.
 16

NATIONALS ENQUIRER AUGUST 5, 2008

WHO ARE WE?, CONTINUED

Here are a few additional facts about the competitors you will encounter at the meet:

A BREAKDOWN OF THE NUMBERS:

Men: 621 Average Age Overall: 50.07
Women: 509 Average Age Men: 52.21
Youngest 19 Average Age Women: 49.67
Man:
Youngest 19 Mean Age 50
Woman: Overall:
Oldest Man: 89 Mean Age Men: 51
Oldest Woman: 90 Mean Age Women: 50

When you said

“Participation Pie”
I thought you were
1% 3%
gonna share your 5%
pizza grandé . . .

19%
40%
Relays
1 Event
2 Events
3 Events
4 Events
5 Events
6 Events*
14%

*Now that the 6th

18% event is out, maybe I
can recruit someone
to join me at a brew
pub . . .
 17

NATIONALS ENQUIRER AUGUST 5, 2008

THE OREGON TRAIL

“Over the Barrel/Under the Barrel”

Butterfly Lessons and More
Achtung! Masters Swimmers! Anyone still needing to learn proper form in the
butterfly might consider practicing Bake’s renowned “over the barrel/under the
barrel” technique. No, it’s not the same technique you used as an age-grouper
when your coach was trying to teach you butterfly body undulation. This
technique involves hoisting a mug at one of the area’s many brew pubs while
watching the newly-filled barrels ferment and listening to your buddy regale you
with stories about his 200 fly (if you don’t have a buddy, bring a youtube.com
demonstration video).

According to the Oregon Brewers Guild, http://oregonbeer.org/, there are currently 63 brewing
companies, operating 88 brewing facilities, in Oregon. There are 30 breweries operating within the
Portland city limits alone, more than in any other city in the world. In the words of the Brewer Guild:

“Oregon is home to more microbreweries per person than just about anyplace on earth. . . . Come visit
us and explore Beervana.

“Oregon has been blessed with beautiful scenery, wonderful local brewing ingredients and innovative
recipes and brewers who love their craft. Hops, grain and fresh water are all plentiful here. . . . By
mixing all these elements together, Oregon brewers have
concocted some of the best beers in the world. . . . So what
makes craft beers taste different than those mass produced
beers? . . . . Ingredients, recipes and intent.

“Craft brewers use all malted grains (and lots of them) to

produce the brewing liquid. Mass produced beers often use
inexpensive filler grains to create a product with little taste
or imagination. . . . Craft beers are made to taste great
using a blend of Old World traditions and Northwest
interpretations of classic recipes.”

Listed below are the Guild-listed breweries in the Portland metropolitan, Mt. Hood and Columbia
River Gorge areas. This subject requires extensive research, and your editors are in hot pursuit as you
read this. Meanwhile, they recommend that you visit the web-sites identified following the brewery
list below if you want to find out more about one of the listed establishments before deciding which to
visit.
 18

NATIONALS ENQUIRER AUGUST 5, 2008

“Over the Barrel/Under the Barrel”, continued

PORTLAND AND MT. HOOD AREA BREWERIES
Alameda Brewhouse Lucky Labrador Brewing McMenamins / Fulton Pub & Brewery
4765 NE Fremont 915 SE Hawthorne 0618 SW Nebraska St.
Portland, OR 97213 Portland, OR 97214 Portland, OR 97201
503-460-9025 503-236-3555 503-246-9530
Amnesia Brewing Company Lucky Labrador Public House McMenamins / Grand Lodge
832 N Beech 7675 SW Capitol Hwy 3505 Pacific Ave.
Portland, OR 97227 Portland, OR 97219 Forest Grove, OR 97116
503-281-7708 503-244-2537 503-992-9533
Big Horn Brewing MacTarnahan’s Taproom McMenamins / Greater Trumps
Clackamas Town Center Pyramid Breweries 1520 SE 37th Ave.
11860 SE 82nd Ave. #3050 2730 NW 31st Ave. Portland, OR 97214 Who are these
Happy Valley, OR 97086 Portland, OR 97210 503-235-4530 ubiquitous
503-659-1282 503-226-7623 McMenamins,
anyway?
BJ’s Pizza, Grill & Brewery Main Street Ale House McMenamins / Highland Pub & Brewery
12105 N Center 333 N Main Ave. 4225 SE 182nd Ave.
Portland, OR 97217 Gresham, OR 97030 Gresham, OR 97030
503-289-5566 503-669-0569 503-665-3015
BJ’s Pizza, Grill & Brewery The Mash Tun McMenamins / Hillsdale Brewery &
825 NE Weidler 2204 NE Alberta St Public
The first pub to Portland, OR 97232 Portland, OR 97211 House
start brewing its 503-288-0111 503-548-4491 1505 SW Sunset Blvd.
own beer in Portland, OR 97201
Oregon was 503-246-3938
McMenamins Clinton St. Brewing Co. Max’s Fanno Creek Brewpub McMenamins / John Barleycorns
Hillsdale . . . 2524 SE Clinton St. 12562 SW Main St. 14610 SW Sequoia Pkwy.
Portland, OR 97202 Tigard, OR 97223 Tigard, OR 97223
503-238-5588 503-624-9400 503-684-2688
Deschutes Brewery & Public House McCormick & Schmicks’s McMenamins / Market Street Pub
210 NW 11th Ave. Harborside Restaurant and Pilsener Room 1526 SW 10th Ave.
Portland, OR 97209 Full Sail Brewery at Riverplace Portland, OR 97201
503-296-4906 0307 SW Montgomery 503-497-0160
Portland, OR 97201
Hair of the Dog Brewing Company McMenamins / Bagdad Theater McMenamins / Mission Theater
4509 SE 23rd 3702 SE Hawthorne Blvd. 1624 NW Glisan St.
Portland, OR 97202 Portland, OR 97214 Portland, OR 97209
503-232-6585 503-236-9234 503-223-4527
Hopworks Urban Brewery McMenamins / Barley Mill Pub McMenamins / Oak Hills Brewpub
2944 SE Powell 1629 SE Hawthorne Blvd. 14740 NW Cornell Rd. Suite 80
Portland, OR 97202 Portland, OR 97214 Portland, OR 97229
503-232-HOPS 503-231-1492 503-645-0286
Laurelwood Public House and Brewery McMenamins / Blue Moon Tavern & McMenamins / Raleigh Hills Pub
5115 NE Sandy Grill 4495 SW Scholls Ferry Rd. Geez, there
Portland, OR 97213 432 NW 21st Ave. Portland, OR 97225 are 55
503-282-0622 Portland, OR 97209 503-292-1723 McMenamins,
503-223-3184 30 on this list
Laurelwood Pizza Company McMenamins / Cornelius Pass Roadhouse McMenamins / Ringlers Annex alone . . .
1728 NE 40th & Imbrie Hall 1223 SW Stark St.
Portland, OR 97212 4045 NW Cornelius Pass Rd. Portland, OR 97205
503-943-6157 Hillsboro, OR 97124 503-525-0520
503-640-6174
Laurelwood Pizza Company McMenamins / Crystal Ballroom & Lola’s McMenamins / Ringlers Pub
1728 NE 40th Room 1332 W Burnside St.
Portland, OR 97212 1332 W Burnside Portland, OR 97209
503-943-6157 Portland, OR 97209 503-225-0627
503-225-0047
 19

NATIONALS ENQUIRER AUGUST 5, 2008

“Over the Barrel/Under the Barrel”, continued

Sure, but that
leaves over 40
Lucky Labrador Beer Hall McMenamins / Edgefield McMenamins / Riverwood Pub
non-
1945 NW Quimby 2126 SW Halsey St. 8136 SW Hall Blvd.
McMenamins
Portland, OR 97209 Troutdale, OR 97060 Beaverton, OR 97008
to choose
503-517-4352 503-669-8610 503-643-7189
from!
McMenamins / Rock Creek Tavern McMenamins on Broadway Philadelphia’s Steaks & Hoagies
10000 NW Old Cornelius Pass Rd. 1504 NE Broadway St., Suite 900 18625 Willamette Dr.
Hillsboro, OR 97124 Portland, OR 97232 West Linn, OR 97068
503-645-3822 503-288-9498 503-699-4130
McMenamins
McMenamins / St. Johns Theater & Pub McMenamins Oregon City Raccoon Lodge and Brewpub Edgefield – isn’t
8203 N Ivanhoe St. 102 9th St. 7424 SW Beaverton-Hillsdale that where the
Portland, OR 97203 Oregon City, OR 97045 Portland, OR 97225 Friday Social is?
503-283-8520 503-655-8032 503-296-0110
McMenamins / The Rams Head McMenamins Sherwood Rock Bottom Brewery
2282 NW Hoyt St. 15976 SW Tualatin-Sherwood Rd. 206 SW Morrison
Portland, OR 97210 Sherwood, OR 97140 Portland, OR 97204
503-221-0098 503-625-3547 503-796-2739
McMenamins / White Eagle Café, Saloon McMenamins Sunnyside Rogue Ales Distillery and Public House
& Rock ‘n’ Roll Hotel 9757 SE Sunnyside Rd., Suite K 1339 NW Flanders
836 N Russell St. Clackamas, OR 97015 Portland, OR 97215
Portland, OR 97227 503-653-8011 503-222-5910
503-282-6810
McMenamins Back Stage Bar McMenamins Tavern & Pool Rogue Meeting Hall
3702 SE Hawthorne Blvd. 1716 NW 23rd Ave. Portland Int’l Airport: Concourse D
Portland, OR 97214 Portland, OR 97210 7000 NE Airport Way
Yeah, and 503-236-9234 503-227-0929 Portland, OR 97218
Lucky 503-460-4040
Labrador’s
serving at the McMenamins Cedar Hills McMenamins West Linn Roots Organic Brewing
BBQ Social on 2927 SW Cedar Hills Blvd. 2090 SW 8th Ave. 1520 SE 7th
Saturday! Beaverton, OR 97005 West linn, OR 97068 Portland, OR 97214
503-641-0151 503-656-2970 503-235-7668
McMenamins Chapel Pub New Old Lompoc / 5th Quadrant Widmer Brothers Brewing Company
430 N Killingsworth St. 3901 N Williams Ave. 929 N Russell
Portland, OR 97217 Portland, OR 97217 Portland, OR 97227
503-286-0372 503-288-3996 503-281-2437
McMenamins Greenway Pub New Old Lompoc / Hedge House Double Mountain Brewery Taproom
12272 SW Scholls Ferry Rd. 3412 SE Division St. 8 Fourth St.
Tigard, OR 97223 Portland, OR 97202 Hood River , OR 97031
503-590-1865 503-235-2215 541-387-0042
McMenamins Kennedy School New Old Lompoc / Oaks Bottom Public Elliot Glacier Public House
5736 NE 33rd Ave. House 4945 Baseline Rd.
Portland, OR 97211 1621 SE Bybee Blvd. Parkdale, OR 97041
503-249-3983 Portland, OR 97202 541-352-1022
503-232-1728
McMenamins Mall 205 New Old Lompoc Brewery Full Sail Brewing Company
9710 SE Washington St., Suite A 1616 NW 23rd 506 Columbia St.
Portland, OR 97216 Portland, OR 97210 Hood River , OR 97031
503-254-5411 503-225-1855 541-386-2247
McMenamins Murray & Allen Old Market Pub & Brewery Mt. Hood Brewing / Ice Axe Grill
6179 SW Murray Blvd. 6959 SW Multnomah Blvd. 87304 E. Gov’t Camp Lp
Beaverton, OR 97005 Portland, OR 97223 Government Camp, OR 97028
503-644-4562 503-244-0450 503-272-3172
Philadelphia’s Steaks & Hoagies
6410 SE Milwaukee Ave.
Portland, OR 97202
503-239-8544
 20

NATIONALS ENQUIRER AUGUST 5, 2008

MORE MORE THAN YOU EVER WANTED TO KNOW

ABOUT BEER CAN BE FOUND HERE:
http://beernorthwest.blogspot.com/
http://www.beernw.com/
http://pacificbrewnews.blogspot.com/
http://www.pacificbrewnews.com/index.htm
http://oregonbeer.org
http://www.guestontap.com/map.shtml (interactive map)

. . . And the editors don’t want to hear anything about beer being incompatible with
Swimming. At least one multi-games Olympian proves otherwise:

I would have
done this for
Lucky Labrador
if Alex Stiles had
just asked . . .
 21

NATIONALS ENQUIRER AUGUST 5, 2008

SWIM FANS’ FORUM

SAQ* Test
The most burning question that will be on swim fans’ minds Saturday evening, August 16,
2008 is:

(a) Whether Paul Smith breaks :54 in the Men’s 45-49 100m Free after training fewer
yards than his Granny;
(b) Whether announcer Mark Gill can stop talking long enough to make it to the blocks
for his own 100m Free race;
(c) Whether editor Frank Parisi can eat BBQ while wearing a Speedo LZR;
(d) Whether OMS will have to chain timers to the pool deck to get them to stay around
for the 200 Meter Free Relays; or
(e) None of the Above.

*SAQ = Self-Absorption Quotient, as in, to what extent are you someone who thinks so much about things you are directly involved
in that you fail to notice other people or the things around them.

ANSWER: (e) None of the above. Hint:

Two great swim events will be occurring Saturday August 16, 2008, at 8:00 PM PST:
NBC will be televising the conclusion of the Olympic swimming events from
Beijing, the Men's 1500M Free, the Women's 50M Free, and the Men’s and Women’s
4x100M Medley Relays
The OMS Organizing Committee will be hosting a family-style barbecue in the field
adjacent to the competition pool, with NBC’s coverage streamed onto the giant
Datronics scoreboard on-deck when coverage starts at 8 PM.
Tickets for the BBQ Social are sold out, but those without tickets are invited to bring a picnic
and join in the spectating fun.

STAY CONNECTED AT NATIONALS!

You can stay connected while at the Aquatic Center if you’re traveling with a wireless-equipped
laptop. The Wifi point is in the “crow’s nest,” located at the top center of the spectator stands.
Those in the know say that the signal is best in the area directly in front of the crow’s nest,
though you may need to huddle with your laptop under a blanket in order to see your screen in
Oregon’s famous summer sunshine!
 22

NATIONALS ENQUIRER AUGUST 5, 2008

In the Next Issue:

• Mo Chambers’ Tips on Dryland Training
• Timeline and Details For the Friday and Saturday Night Socials
• Evolution of the Swimming Costume
• One Secret of Olympians’ Success