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Prez Sez

The allen dance at the first BUMP meeting of the year was very impressive to say the least About forty-six members, new and old, came to listen and participate in determining the "BUMP game-plan" for future months. To all of you who shared opinions and ideas, thank:you. We want to hear more from everyone. The invasion afterwardsof Guadalahara was overwhelming to that poor unsuspecting restaurant. We1l wam them next time. The January trail work.<Jaytum-out was a little light but the weather was not very conducive either. The next two work.<Jaysare going to be very important I hope everybody will make a conscious effort to show up for at least a couple of hours. We really need your volunteer help. Thanks to everyone who gave donations for the cause of trail access at Oak Mountain. Your generosity is great.! y appreciated. Please continue to make use of the little BUMP envelopes at the lrailheads for the donationboxes. I want to take a moment and encourage everyone to be active and participate in our club. We have a lot of rides and outings coming up this spring which will be noted in the Calendar of Events each month. But we also have impromptu rides every weekend and everyone is invited to go. For information on non-published rides each week, call BUMP WEEKEND HOTLINE at 8061484. We also would love to hear from all of you about what you would like to see in the Grinder, and there are a couple openings left for roving reporters. Please contactmyself or Jenifer if you are interested in contributingmaterial The first Open Steering Committee meeting of the year was held at my house and a lot was accomplished which will be discussed at the BUMP meetings and individualcomrniuee gatherings. Our membership is growing, up to 90 or so by now. Help us continue the pace so others will say wow!

Memo to Local Bike Stores

Homewood Cycles Bob's Bikes River Oaks Cycles Cahaba Cycles From the Birmingham Urban Mountain Pedalers Officers: Secretary: Barry Hair President: Hugh Learer Treasurer: Ken H~er Viae President: JeniferJackson Re: Participation in BUMP Oub meetings: We greatly appreciate your donations to the BUMP club, as well as our discount and your efforts toward increasing Oill membership. We are encouraging our members to be supportive of the local shops and to check with you before mail-ordering. BUMP is undergoing a metamorphosis from a social club to an incorporated non-profit organization. We are working to become even more aggressively involved with statewide issues and we would like to continue to expand beyond the scope of the Greater Birmingham area. We have recently leamed from Allen Polk of the U.S. Forest Service that ''BUMP is the only voice for Mountain Biking in Alabama". We assume by that he means we are the only legitimate organization actively involved in lobbying for preservation and expanSIOnof our sport-up until now, mainly through the efforts of Ken Hester. Allen Polk's advice was "...all I can say is stay together". We can extrapolate from those cryptic words that we should also get together throughout the state. We plan to sponsor several events this year, including (we hope) a NORBA sanctioned mountain bike race. Also, BUMP was instrumental in Tanrehill receivingpreliminaryapproval of a federal grant to build the trail between Tannehill and Briarfield, and our own trail engineering team will be designing the approximate 30 mile route. Sinoe we "started over" last (Xtober, our membership has grown to over 90 and we're working on bringing more people into the sport as well as into our club all the time. This year we will be more aggressive than ever in our campaign to educate mountain bikers to ride responsibly, in an effort to "legitimize" mountain biking and promote better relations within the local trailusing community. And as always, we are working hard to find more places nearbyto rire. Solidarity in the mountain biking community is the only way we can hope to insure the future of our sport in this area. Full implementation of our ambitious goals will require a well organized effort. We want to be in close communication with the local bike shops, and for this reason we would really like to see a representative from each store at the monthly meetings. Over forty members have attended our recent meetings-<ledicated equipment and accessory hungry mountain bikers who no doubt exert an influence on the constant influx of novices to the sport. As a marketing opportunity for you, a consumer benefit for our club, and just to get to know you better, we would like to feature a shop each month on a rotating basis to offer your representatives the opportunity to take some time at each meeting to lalk about the shop, hand out any promotional material you may have on upcoming sales, and to help educate us in mall~rs concemmg the bicycle industry. We invite you to whetl in bikes or bi; 19 in "cw productSor use the time in any way you see fiL We are also considering the idea of a dealer membership program and are interested in your views as to how this could be structured. Please let us hear from you soon. Thank you. JeniferJackson

by Hedda Rockhopper

What long time BUMP members are dragging their little feet about turning in their applications and twenty bucks? One can only conjecture as to the nature of the misgivings which trouble our reluctant friends. Could it possibly be the money? They spend more than that on candy bars and Mexican food. Might the waiver be the source of their reticence? But how could we imagine they would begrudge legal protection for the BUMP officers and members? Could commitment be their dilemma? Why. they've been active and supportive for years! Perhaps it comes down to a lack of understanding as to why a more structured format is necessary. BUMP was fine the way it was ... relaxed and social. Why do we need the hindrance of organiZation and paperwork? We'll probably be too old to ride when the trails are all gone, anyway. Well ... if you put it that way.


139 Jac'- 13ranJg

Public Relations
9429128/3282626 987-8510/969-6356 Stacy Kelly Jenifer Jackson 664-5402/5212831 591-0090/806-1484 Hugh Leader Banyl13.ir

There are some days when I think "why do I keep trying to be a better mountain biker? I'm already over thirty and its time to just let go, get fat and die slowly." But I only think that way when I'm stuck in traffic or after some chick just turned me down for a date. When I'm on my bike I know I'm in my prime and I've only just begun to truly live.

Fund Raising
Jenifer Jacl<son Stacy Kelly Banyl13.ir 591-0900 / 105-1484 664-5402/521-2831 987-8510 /969-6356 Hugh Leader laJrie Mcleman Tracy Reid 942-9128/328-2626 942-5165/871-3252 647-3102/934-0342

Rides & Trips

Jack Bransdori Todd Sproull Laurie Mcleman Beth Ballenger 985-1233 /933-61 03 870-9258 942-5165/871-3252 328-5951 Debbie Sprooll Jenifer Jackson Hugh Leader 870-9258 591-0090/806-1484 942-9128/328-2626

We had to put it off a week due to weather. and this time of year you don't know what the weather isgoing to do until the morning if the day in question. The original date set was January 8th. but the rainy week prior and the cold temperatures prompted the mysteryhoncho to punt". The next Saturday promised cold temps but not as much mud. so the mystery phone squad made some calls. On the sunny morning of January 15th. 20 hearty. hardcore members of BUMPshowed up at LLoyd'son 280at 10:45amin 20 degree weather to ride. Our long caravan of bike-covered vehiclesgot back on 280 to make the 30 minute trip to Childersburg where the mystery ride would be unfolded. We arrived at the mystery meeting place: Merkles Junk Yard. While we made our arctic preparations in escalating temperatures of over 25 degrees. more and more bikebedecked vehicles came rolling in. It was a mountain biking festival! As the mystery unravelled further. BUMPmystery leader. Bill Garrett had arranged for our out-of-town mystery leader Perry Clark of the SylacaugaBicycle Club to show us their turf. Perry and his5 compadres present that day proceeded to lead uson a very well organized ride. The group was large so we were divided into two groups: The hammer crowd which Perry led on a 20 mile ride. did both the Flagpole Mountain TowerLoop and the Creek Trail. The rest of were adeptly led by ChrisPiland on the very very hilly 12.5 mile Flagpole Mountain Tower Loop. Each of the groups were provided cheerful cabooses. Ours was Fred Bradford. who very kindly led one of our members back to the cars when she began experiencing the initial stages of frostbite in her toes. The members of the Sylacauga Bicycle Club were enthusiastic about riding with our club. The club has twenty or so members and is into it's third year. We had a wonderful time that day despite the cold. with Perry Clark. Chris Piland. Fred Bradford. Frank Conn. Denis Nicholson and Jerry Hicks. Our thanks to these guys for coming out and showing us their trails. We look forward to riding with them again soon.


424-4288/879-8373 933-7504 956-9963/934-5(X)0 BalTyl13.ir Greg Waldrop Doug Doughhetee 987-8510/969-6356 674-5444/747-1563 995-2013/868-5436

Ken Hester Quilton Young BiRGarTen

Trail Blazing
Bil Garren Qunton Young Chuck Whited 956-9963/934-5(X)0 933-7504 956-3767 Roger Keel Greg Waldrop 942-0506/251-6778 674-5444/747-1563


987-8510/969-6356 980-~ 785-9169 / 324-5615 Jenifer Jackson Hugh Leader Jack Bransdori 591 -0090 /80&-1484 942-9128/328-2626 985-1233/933-6103

Karen Whitmer Teresa Piercy

Hedda Rockhopper Amy liJnter Non-Published 933-1952/783-3600 JenHer Jackson Hugh Leader 591-<ml / 80&-1484 942-9128/328-2626

laJrie Mclennan Lee Rivers Sally Bilstrom Carl Haywocxj Matthew Riedinger Troy Schmidt Roger Keel 942-5165 / 871-3252 956-1977 / 868-5559 933-7144 853-8927/680-9333 663-4279 / 987-4581 987-7900 /987-1886 942-05(X) /251-6778 BanyHar Jerry Akers Bob Bruner MikeHening Jenifer Jackson Jack Bransdori 987-851 0 / 969-6356 854-7877 979-1508/995-6559 663-Q083 591-0090 /80&-1484 985-1233 / 933-6103

Jenifer Jackson Laurie Mcleman Teresa Piercy Slacy Kelly 591-0900 / 80&-1484 942-5165/871-3252 785-9169/324-5615 664-5402/521-2831 Doug Doughhetee f-kJgh Leader Jack Bransdori Tracy Reid 995-2013/868-5436 942-9128/328-2626 985-1233/933-61 03 647-3102/934-0342

Trail Maintenance
Bil Garren Carl Haywocxj Doug Doughhetee 956-9963 / 9345060 853-8927/680-9333 995-2013/868-5436 Ken Hester Rd<O'Hara Quinton Young 424-4288/879-8373 939-3232 933-7504

Phone Calling
Banyl13.ir Jack Bransdori Laurie Mcleman Slacy Kelly Ken Hester 987-8510/969-6356 985-1233/933-61 03 942-5165/871-3252 664-5402/521-2831 424-4288 / 879-8373 Jenifer Jackson Hugh Leader Teresa Piercy BiIGarTen Quinton Young 591-0090 /80&-1484 942-9128/328-2626 785-9169/324-5615 956-9963 /934-5060 933-7504

If you want to become more involved with the direction that BUMP takes this year, contact one of the people on the committee(s) you are interested in, and get on board. Please join us at the Open Steering Committee Meeting / BUMP Beer Bash at Jack Bransdorf's on Friday February 18th at 6:30pm. Call Jack to find out what to bring and how to get there.

U11@~U~mJ~ [F~UmJ@@@
Dr. Juan Saxon on Being Over Thirty
I don't know much about being over thirty, it's not my area of expertise and I don't have time to look it up ...but I remember when I was a little kid-there was some talk about the age of thirty being "over-the-hill". I bought it back then, because when I was twelve it seemed reasonable. But now that I've been over thirty for a few years, and since most of my friends are too-at least the ones who have any sense--I have a different perspective on this matter. Medically speaking, I can only shoot from the hip on this, but it seems to me that certain things happen to our bodies when we reach our thirties. The main thing that many of us find ourselves dealing with (which never was such a problem before) is insidious weight gain, and the fact that it seems impossible to lose it. I think, based on the evidence of my own opinions, that our twenties were just an elaborate ten-year-Iong grace period. Our bodies were kind enough to let us slide on facing the full ramifications of our wanton self-abuse and neglecLfor a while. Upon reaching our thirties, its time to pay the balloon note, as it were. What self-abuse and neglect you ask? Are you kidding? Remember what we ate? Remember what we didn't eat. Remember when we didn't eat? Remember what we drank? Remember how much and how often? How about how we used to exercise ...over-<:ioing it and under-doing it? And don't forgeLthe sunbathing. It becomes clear to us when we become thirty-something, that our bodies require and expect some disciplined effort, maturity and balance to produce the same results as seemed to come so easily only five or ten years ago. But the thing I've noticed the most about being over thirty is that I'm smarter about taking care of myself, and consequently I'm happier. Of course I make a shit-Ioad of money now and that could have something to do with it too. But the satisfaction I receive from hard mountain biking is sweeter now because every step of my advancing fitness is hard won through a self-discipline and self-awareness and self-respect-that I didn't have before. I recommend being over thirty. Its the best I've ever been.

When We Were KjcGeJ



We are approaching the completion 01 the loop at Oak Mountain. February and March trail work-days willbe especially demanding due to the extensive side-hillingrequired by the topography of the last section of trail. Please plan to be there and help. Our next Trail work-day is scheduled for Saturday February 5th. IIwe are rained (or snowed) out we willreschedule lor Saturday February 12th. As always we'lImeet at the Park OHice on Terrace Driveat lOam. Bringworkgloves, water and a snack. "you arrivea littlelate, we will be parking on the Cabin Road near the Northtrailhead. Thework-days planned lor the rest of the year are: March 5, Saturday April10, Sunday May7, Saturday June 5, Sunday July 9, Saturday August 7, Sunday Sept.l0, Saturday October 9, Sunday Nov. 5, Saturday Dec. 11, Sunday Alter we linish constructing the loop, we will be doing much needed maintenance on the trail. When we get everything in good shape, we'll lookto do some projects on door trailsinthe area. Notice: When the temperature goes down to 20 or below, all trails at Oak Mountain will be closed to bikes the next day.

Once upon a time .. .in the earliest days of the Wondrous And Noble Sport Of Mountain Biking, all of the Enchanted Trails in the Great Kingdom Of Oak Mountain were open to the Bicyclers Of The Mountain. In that innocent age, the Woods Walkers and the Bicyclers Of The Mountain got along and shared. Then there came a day when an enterprising subject wished to hold a race in the Great Kingdom Of Oak Mountain to bring together all of the great heros of the Wondrous And oble Sport Of Mountain Biking to test their prowess. This enterprising subject came before the Prince Of Oak Mountain and respectfully petitioned leave and blessing for the contest, which he received. All went well as word crossed the land of the marvelous race which was to be held, and brave athletes far and wide made preparations to journey to the Great Kingdom Of Oak Mountain as the day would soon be upon them. But The Dark Wizard Of The Woods Walkers learned of the race and cast a spell over the land and the people and even the Prince and the Court to make them forget that there was to be a contest at all. Only the astonishing strength of the great heros of the Wondrous And Noble Sport Of Mountain Biking gave them the power to withstand the lure of The Haze Of Forgetfulness cast over the land. So came the day of the race and there convened a proud assemblage of courageous contestants at the Trail Head Of The North. The air was alive with festivity as the great heros of the Wondrous And Noble Sport Of Mountain Biking made ready to compete. But the Haze Of Forgetfulness made the Prince and the members of the Court forget to come. And the Haze Of Forgetfulness made all the Woods Walkers forget to walk on all the many many other wonderful Enchanted Trails in the Great Kingdom Of Oak Mountain. At the appointed time, the great heros of the Wondrous And Noble Sport Of Mountain Biking gathered at the start and were off in a thunderous haste the instant they were called upon to commence. And at that very moment The Dark Wizard Of The Woods Walkers lifted the veil of his spell and the Woods Walkers on the trail awakened in terror in the midst of the race and were undone. And so it came about that the frightened Woods Walkers went to the Prince and pleaded that the Bicyclers Of The Mountain never again be allowed to ride on the trails of the Great Kingdom Of Oak Mountain. The Prince in his wisdom realized that there had been a dark spell cast upon them all and issued a decree that henceforth, the Bicyclers Of The Mountain in the Kingdom must ride only the very short, very mundane Trail Of The Red, which angered the Woods Walkers even though they had many many enchanted miles of trails to themselves. The Prince then granted permission to the Bicyclers Of The Mountain to build their own Enchanted Trail with the solemn admonition that for always there would be Woods Walkers on all trails, and to take care never to frighten them lest they require of us our one remaining trail. This Tale of days long ago was related to a stunned modern-day mountain biker beside the last bridge on the Enchanted Trail Of Seven Bridges subsequent to an Enchanted Endo, by the wise Fairy Troll who lives beneath the bridge, and is not necessarily in accordance with the views of the editorial staff of the Grinder. Hedda Rockhopper

Dear Hughie. My friend Sven says the new vented bike saddles for women are not politically correct! I need to know, if a guy uses one, is this a cross or a bi-cycle?

[alendar of EventS
February 5th-Saturday lOam, Trail Work Day at Oak Mountain. Meet at tre Park Office or at tre Camp Road near the North trail head. We will reschedule to the 12th if the weather is bad. February 6th-Sunday 8:00am. BUMP ride at Rockford. Meet at LLoyds on 280. Morning and afternoon rides. Lunch provided at $3 per person. Proposed site for BUMP / NORBA Mountain Bike Race. For additional information contact Jack Bransdorf, 985-1233 / 933-6103. If weather is qlstionable, please call Jack to confirm. February 18th-Friday 6:30pm. Open Steering Committee Meeting / BUMP Beer Bash at Jack Bransdorf's. Let Jack know if you are planning to come so he can tell you what to bring and how to get there. 985-1233/933-6103. February 20th-Sunday 8am. BUMP exploratory ride at Tuskegee. Meet at Alab,Ll1a Outdoors. If weather is questionable, please call Quinton to confirm, 933-7504. February 26th-Saturday 8:30am. Sylacauga Bicycling Club ride at Talladega Springs. Contact Jenifer if interested, 591-0990. March 2nd-Wednesday 7pm. BUMP Monthly Meeting at the Hoover Public Library, downstairs in the second meeting room on the left. We will be having dinner afterwards at Guadalahara Mexican Restaurant across Highway 31. March 5tll--Saturday 10am. Trail Work Day at Oak Mountain.

DearInsecure, Uh, uh, uh, nill'm not really familiar with these new saddles ....but it seems to me that we as men in the 90's need to become more comfortable with our feminine sides. Annnnd this of course is, wellllllll, harder for some of us than for others....depending upon, that is, how incredibly manly we are in thefirst place. un suspect you have some, uh, uh, soul searching to do.
Dear Hughie, Why do people have trails ... hikers or bikers? to be rude on the

Dear sensitive, mill think we all know that down through the ages people have hated what they don't understand. This of course does not account for the phenomenon of 'bike on bike" crime. You see, I too hcweexperienced being buzzed on my bike by a Tread with his head up his ...uh, uh...that is to say...we all need to be aware of some basic "trail etiquette". While riding your bike and passing a hiker, slow down to a walking pace and speak: thank themfor stepping to the side or make an appreciative comment about the weather or nature or something. While riding downhill, yield to a rider coming uphill unless they instruct you to come through. We don't run into horses at Oak Mountain, but whenever you encounter a horse while riding anywhere, always dismount and request directions from the rider. IIHl think you get the idea.

March 6th-Sunday 9am. BUMP ride at Kentuck Trail in Talladega. Meet at Olive Garden near Eastwood Mall. If weather is questionable, call Roger Keel to confirm. 942-{)506 or 251-6778. April 16th-Maddog, NORBA Sanctioned Mountain race. Preregistration forms will be available in the bike smps. Bike

~Pe rsonal


Susan Baugh Monty Mims Dennis Funchess Susan Nelson * Laurie Funchess Bob Nicholson Chris Graves Ron Park Rebecca Graves Mark Reed John Griffin Dale Smith * Bill Johnson Dan Watson Celia Johnson Karen Witmer Thanks to our new members for your support of BUMP and of Mountain Biking. We look forward to getting to know you. * Special thanks to long time BUMP pillars for re-joining.

For Sale-BUMP sweatshirts only $15 and tank tops only $10. See Hugh or call 942-9128 or 328-2626. To Order-Team BUMP jersey call Barry 987-8510 or 969-6356. Needed-Donations for trail maintenance at Oak Mountain. Use BUMP envelopes provided at North and South trail head "Shrines" for donation boxes. Free Wake-Up Calls-Contact newly appointed BUMP Chief of Sleep: Bill Garrett, to receive a call anytime between 4:30am and 9:59am. 956-9963. Ideas Wanted-For National Trail Day June 4th at Oak Mountain. Activities, workshops, demonstrations, etc ... Contact anyone on the Special Events Committee. Name Change-Laurie DeShazo will now be famous as Laurie Mclennan. Lost-On loop: hex key tool, chain tool, and car key on yellow key chain. If found please call Chris Graves 979-7640. BUMP WEEKEND HOTLINE-Call 806-1484 to hear a recording of rides and events for upcoming weekend. Leave a message to let us know you're coming or to receive a phone call for more info.


To submit information

of any kind, writeto:


GRIND[R City Office, 5401 9th Avenue South,

S'ham 35212, or fax to 591-0990.