Gallagher 1

Religion and Interpersonal Guilt:

How Guilt Affects Youth
Brian Gallagher Kate Simcox Senior Seminar December 11th, 2013

Gallagher 2 Introduction Guilt is a common experience for all people. When one does something they believe is wrong, the feeling of guilt arises when they are aware of the wrongdoing. Billy Graham explains that guilt, from a Christians perspective, is the result of breaking Gods law. The feeling of guilt then comes when one is conscious of violating Gods law, resulting in a feeling of failure to measure up to ones own expectations or the worlds expectations of themselves (Graham, 1996). It is apparent that youth are more open about their issues in their own lives. Youth are readily eager to share about struggles with drugs, alcohol, pre-marital sex, the party life, and a vast amount of other issues. A youth will be talking about their struggle with some kind of addiction and even when progress is great, the guilt remains and makes them feel as though they are in a losing battle, when theologically, the battle and the war is already won. The common denominator through it all is the feeling of guilt. Youth struggle with the feeling of guilt after they are conscious of doing something that they feel is immoral. Youth in Christianity are taught that Jesus died on the cross for their sins and that their sins are forgiven. The Christian religion promotes freedom from sin and, ultimately, freedom from guilt. With the idea of grace as a gift as the Bible says, youth should be cleansed from their guilt by seeking repentance and seeking a personal relationship with Jesus, understanding what the act on the cross signifies. Ultimately, youth do experience guilt even though they are aware of what Jesus did for them on the cross. This research report aims to look at the correlation between guilt and religion, and whether or not is dealt with in a healthy manner. RQ 1: Is it true that the more the religion, the more the guilt? Or does one need that concept of guilt in order to understand grace? RQ 2: If the guilt is there, is the managing of guilt healthier when one has more religion? Elizabeth Albertsen, Lynn OConnor, and Jack Berry write in their article Religion and Interpersonal Guilt: Variations across Ethnicity and Spiritually that guilt is the uncomfortable emotion when someone believes one has done something believed to be wrong (Albertson, OConnor, Berry, 2006). A. Ellis describes it as an unnecessary part of religion (Ellis, 1980). Furthermore, guilt is a vital emotion in human experience, defined as a negative experience resulting from a disapproving conclusion about ones behaviour. This goes hand in hand with what youth are experiencing today. They are aware of some negative behaviour and they judge themselves, expecting a better outcome of themselves. Guilt usually affects someones life without him or her even knowing it. Guilt can promote obsessive-compulsive symptoms, interpersonal sensitivity, depression, anxiety, and others (Albertson, OConnor, Berry, 2006). There are ways that one can cleanse guilt. Kenneth Burke describes in the guiltredemption cycle, which he says is the root of all rhetoric, that one can manage guilt with mortification or victimage. Mortification is defined as the confession of guilt and request for forgiveness, whereas victimage is defined as scapegoating, which names an external enemy as the source of the problem (Griffin, 2012). Burke defines guilt as tension, anxiety, embarrassment, shame, disgust, and other noxious feelings intrinsic to the human condition (Griffin, 2012). Even though Burke did not claim to have faith, he said that the theological term

Gallagher 3 of mortification and asking for forgiveness after confession is better than any other social terminology of human relations (Griffin, 2012). Burke scratches the surface to a theological term of a way to manage guilt, definitely favoring that mortification is more productive in the rhetorical process than victimage. With the idea of guilt having a theologically based background, or a feeling of wrongdoing and asking for forgiveness, Christianitys god -term grace is easily applied. Watson, Morris, and Hood (1988) suggest the perception of unconditional divine forgiveness may lessen the blow of guilt, but found a negative association of this premise, finding that religiosity made the feeling of guilt worse. Ratanasiripong suggests, however, without a personal concept of guilt or wrong-doing, there is no need for grace (Ratanasiripong, 1996), thus finding guilt is necessary for understanding exactly what grace means, noticing what is wrong and how it can be made right. For Christian youth, this concept of guilt is a means to understanding exactly what Jesus did for them on the cross. The key piece to understanding Billy Grahams definition of guilt is that the feeling of guilt does not arise until one is conscious of actually violating Gods standards, their standards, or the worlds standards. Without understanding truly what one has done wrong, what is right is not as authentic, and youth are keenly aware of this. Extebarria, Ortiz, Conjero, and Pascual (2009) conducted an experiment in hopes of finding the differences between gender resolutions of guilt. Youth were also studied, targeting 159 adolescents aged 15 to 19, 96 young adults aged 25 to 33, and 108 adults aged 40 to 50. The predominant faith of all participants was Catholic or Christian. Extebarria, Ortiz, Conjero, and Pascual told the 360 participants to fill out a questionaire where six situations where explained. By action or omission, the main character harms another person, and the participant had to rate on a scale of one to seven how guilty they would feel in the action. The researchers concluded that ultimately women had the highest in the category of habitual guilt in all age groups, but the adolescent group was the highest in the sub group of habitual guilt. In the responses after the situational questionnaire, when asked if the persons feelings where more intense toward the situation than how they let on in the situational questionnaire, 71.4% of adolescent men and 91.3% of adolescent women said their feelings were more intense. Although this research studied gender differences in resolutions of their guilt, there were glaring numbers that explained the amount of guilt that the adolescent age group of 15 to 19 year olds was feeling, which was stated but not focused on in the research. Albertsen, OConnor and Berry (2006) explain that the Catholic religion averages higher levels of guilt, while more spiritual religions yield less guilt. Spirituality is defined as connecting with the existence of non-physical elements of the world, which religions like Buddhism, Hinduism and Islam promote (Piedmont, 1999). Christianity can often be looked at as God doing something for the people, whereas spiritual religions are the people doing something for the god. In the results of Albertsen, OConnor, and Berry, their research found that Catholics had higher levels of guilt than people with no religiosity, or people who were part of spiritual religions. In a religion where salvation is a gift and does not have to be re-gifted (Downing, 2012), there seems to be some type of disconnect. If Ratanasiripong says that guilt is needed to understand grace, then with grace at the forefront of Christianity, can guilt be dealt with at a healthy level? Hypothesis

Gallagher 4 The research will examine the maturity of the interviewees faith and find if this maturity directly relates to how they handle the guilt that they feel. Out of the 8 interviewees, the hypothesis is that youth with an in depth personal relationship with Jesus will still experience guilt, but will handle it in a healthier way than youth with a lower concept of Jesus. Individuals with a close relationship with Jesus will not internalize their guilt, but rather talk it out to a person in authority in their life, and ultimately recognize the forgiveness and the grace that Christianity has and have a more positive outlook on what guilt means to them. Youth with a lessened relationship with Jesus, whether they are a new believer or just not theologically sound, will have a more negative response to guilt and handle it in an unhealthy manner. This report will analyze trends in how youth deal with guilt depending on their religiosity, how they ultimately define guilt, and how they manage their guilt. Method Participants were 8 middle school to high school students aged 14 to 18, who filled out a questionnaire about guilt during their interview. Arthur Asa Berger say that interviews enable researchers to obtain information they cannot gain by just observation (Berger, 2014). The approach for these interviews was structured interview, with a specific set of instructions that guide the conversation. Berger also states that interviews are a part of qualitative research methods (Berger, 2014). The participants were mostly from Pennsylvania, while one was from South Carolina. Interviewees consisted of 4 girls and 4 boys, all of which are Christians. The interviews were given over Facebook. A word document was sent to each individual person with only a small amount of insight into what the research was looking for. The interviewee then took any amount of time they needed to answer all the questions as in depth as they wanted to. The questions were intentionally open-ended and did not lead the interviewer on to a certain type of answer. The questions asked were: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. Describe your religion/spirituality and what it means to you How would you define guilt? When was the last time you felt guilty? Explain. Do you talk to someone or internalize the guilt? What do you do to get rid of your guilt?

In distinguishing between answers throughout the research, boy 1 will be identified as B1; girl 1 will be identified as G1, etc. The questions promoted any amount of disclosure that the interviewee felt comfortable with. Since all of the interviewees are Christian, the words religion, spirituality, or guilt did not have to be defined, since that is ultimately what is being studied. The results of this research are very much at the mercy of the disclosure of the interviewee. Results B1, B2, G1, G2, G3 ultimately handles guilt in positive way ) B3, B4, ultimately handles guilt in negative way ) G4 unclear ) B1 B2 B3 B4

Gallagher 5 Q1. Forgiveness, second chances, new life, new found hope. Q2. Gut wrenching feeling of self disgust caused by something you have done knowing it was wrong. Q4. I talk to my youth pastor or best friend. 1. Thinks of others, cares for others, be passionate for others. 2. Feeling of regret after committing an act that is against ones moral code. 1. God listens to me without talking back, unlike with other people. 2. Doing something you know your not supposed to and that feeling you get after you do it. 1. When I need something, God is my outlet to help me. 2. That thing that rumbles in your stomach and helps you make decision to turn around and fix what you have done. 4. I just hold it in and try my hardest to just let it go and move and live my life 5. I make myself believe that what I did is just or that I dont care about it. G4 1. Full time Christian girl. I dont call it a religion because to me, its a relationship.

4. I usually take my 4. I dont talk to one guilt to God about it. I internalize what I have done 5. I talk to God, He fixes it. 5. I ask for forgiveness.

Q5. I talk about it to people I trusts.

G1 Q1. My faith is based on the sacrifice of Jesus Christit gives me so much comfort to know I dont have to suffer. Q2. Feelings that someone gets when they know they did something wrong. Q4. My youth pastor.

G2 1. Ive been Christian my whole lifeconnect to God on a daily basis and do everything for him. 2. Feeling bad/sorry for something you did, and regretting it. 4. It would be nice to have someone to talk to, but I try to remember to pray. 5. I ask God for forgiveness when I pray.

G3 1. I love God very much. God gave me a family that loves me and cares about meI know God is real. 2. Feeling of shame for the things I do and regret. 4. I talk to my parents or someone I can trust, but most of the time I ask God for forgiveness. 5. I pray about it. I read my bible. Ask God to forgive me.

2. Doing something wrong and feeling bad after doing it. 4. I dont talk to anyone.

Q5. I reaffirm that Jesus has already forgiven me and ask Jesus for forgiveness.

5. Try to make things right and be happy. I cant fix it.

When asked about their religion or spirituality in question one, all 8 described themselves as believers in God and in Jesus, saying they are Christian. In question two, all 8 of the interviewees unanimously described guilt with language like a gut wrenching feelingknowing

Gallagher 6 you did something wrongregretting it. In question three, the situations the interviewees explained were obviously very different from each other, however, it usually involved hurting someone close to them like a family member or a significant other. In B2s case, however, it was not spending enough time growing in their relationship with God. In question four, a lot of different answers were given, which is where trends on how healthily the interviewee handles their guilt were noticed. Four of eight interviewees (B1, B2, G1, G3) would talk to someone in authority when they feel guilty, like their youth pastor, parents, and in B2s case, God. G2s answer said that she would want to talk to someone if she had someone to talk to, thusly nullifying her for fitting in a category in this question. The remaining three interviewees (B3, B4, G4) internalize guilt or hold it in. In question five, direct correlations between question one and five were present, going with the hypothesis on the more the religion, the healthier the managing of guilt. Five of eight interviewees (B1, B2, G1, G2, G3) described their religion and Christianity, but talked more about the relationship they have with Jesus, how they dont have to suffer anymore, and how much Jesus meant to them. Four of these interviewees said in question five that they ask God for forgiveness, or as G1 put it, reaffirm that Jesus has already forgiven me and that gets rid of their guilt. In B1s case, he talks about it with people he trusts, which is definitely a healthy way to manage guilt, but did not follow the trend of using Christian language. B3, B4 talked about God in question one as an outlet of help or someone to talk to when they feel bad, and both B4 and G4 talked about God being there to listen to them. Thus, B1, B2, G1, G3, G2 all had a high concept of who God and Jesus is to them and ultimately handled guilt in a healthy way. They talked it out to people in authority, and even went to God with their struggle. B3 and B4 both had lower concepts of what Jesus means to them and explained unhealthy ways of managing guilt, like internalizing and keeping it inside of them, not expecting things to change. G4, who was from South Carolina, was deemed unclear on whether they handle their guilt healthily or unhealthily. She did talk about the relationship she has with God and how it means a lot to her, but would internalize the guilt and not talk to anyone about it, even God. This went against the common trend of the interviewees that handled their guilt healthily. Discussion Ultimately, the hypothesis was correct, aside from G4. In RQ1, it does seem that the more the religion, the more the guilt, as Albertsen, OConnor, and Berry explain (2006). It is undeniable that guilt is prevalent in these 8 adolescents. Situations described were usually them hurting someone close to them, but in B4s case, it was even as extreme as having sex with his best friends girlfriend, afterwards making himself believe that what he did was right. Albertsen, OConnor, and Berry (2006) explain that guilt is an emotion when one believes that something they did was wrong, which was heavily supported in this research. All of the interviewees ascribed guilt as some negative feeling that happens when they realize that they did something wrong. As far as the guilt needed to understanding grace in RQ2, the research supports this claim with the 5 interviewees going in depth about Jesus, who ultimately understood that going to God for forgiveness is the best way to manage the guilt they felt, however great or small the guilt was. Watson, Morris, and Hood (1988) suggested that religion could lessen the blow of guilt, but found a negative correlation. It seems that these interviews do counter this point, just like Ratanasiripong claimed (1996). Religion seems to lessen the blow of guilt, making it a healthy

Gallagher 7 way to cleanse guilt, ultimately meaning that the more the religion, the healthier the managing of guilt. The ones who handled their guilt in a healthy manner were the ones who went in depth about explaining what Jesus meant to them. They emphasized forgiveness and grace and how the love they have for God is what defines who they are. B1 described his faith as meaning forgiveness, second chances, new life and new found hope. The ones who handled their guilt in an unhealthy manner would internalize their guilt and not talk to anyone about it, and they explained that God was more someone who they could talk to and go to for help, never mentioning the importance of the relationship with Jesus. B3 mentioned that he knows where he is going after he passes away, but described God as a God that always listens to me without talking back, unlike with other people. G4 was the only one that was hard to determine where she fell on the healthy/unhealthy spectrum. She described a deep relationship with God and explained how God made her happy, but she internalized all guilt and didnt want to talk to anyone about it. She also explained that the guilt cannot be fixed and stays there inside my head. Further research on cultural differences in managing guilt would be useful because she was the only one not from Pennsylvania. Culture could play a big role in how a youth manages guilt, seeing as cultural values and belief systems are greatly different in Pennsylvania and South Carolina. If these interviews were done in person, there could have been more in depth follow-up questions to the original questions, leading to more of an insight into religiosity and managing guilt. Since all 8 interviewees were Christian, there could be more to there answers for the spiritual question if it was face-to-face. Further research would warrant face-to-face interviews, although social media is so impersonal, that could have promoted the amount of disclosure the research did get, since it is not as uncomfortable and intimidating as face-to-face interviews, especially considering the subject matter. More research on healthy and unhealthy ways of managing guilt would be important. There is not much scholarly research on healthy or unhealthy ways of dealing with guilt, only scholarly research on what healthy and unhealthy guilt is by definition. This research includes a better look into the life of youth, promoting a response on how to approach youth with their issues of guilt. Even though most of the issues of guilt described by these 8 interviewees were on the small side, it is obvious that guilt is apparent in youth and happens to be a part of their life. Crystal Downing in Changing Signs of Truth explains salvation as a gift and does not have to be re-gifted (2012), and since Christianity teaches that the world is a fallen world, guilt is a part of the human experience. Religion, however, seems to be an outlet to help cleanse this guilt. Christianity is a religion where God sent his son, Jesus, to die on the cross for the believers sins. Understanding this idea of unconditional divine grace (Watson, Morris, and Hood, 1998) is vital to knowing how to manage guilt in a healthy manner (Ratanasiripong, 1996). The interviewees without a high concept of what Jesus did for them on the cross resorted to unhealthy modes of managing guilt, whereas interviewees with a high concept of what Jesus means to them managed guilt in an overwhelmingly positive way. When there is more religion, there is more healthier manners of managing guilt. Guilt promotes the need for grace, recognizing what one has done wrong makes one turn to ways to make it right. Thus, one who turns to Jesus with their guilt and asks for forgiveness ultimately experienced healthier ways of cleansing their guilt.

Gallagher 8 Works Cited Albertsen, Elizabeth J., Lynn E. O'Connor, and Jack W. Berry. "Religion and Interpersonal Guilt: Variations Across Ethnicity and Spirituality." Mental Health, Religion and Culture (2006): 67-84. Web. 20 Oct. 2013. Berger, Arthur Asa. "Interviews." Media and Communication Research Methods: An Introduction to Qualitative and Quantitative Approaches. 3rd ed. Los Angeles: SAGE, 2014. 159-61. Print. Downing, Crystal L. "Signs of the Times." Changing Signs of Truth. Downers Grove: InterVarsity, 2012. 53. Print. Ellis, A. (1980). Psycholotherapy and athesistic values: A Response to A. E. Bergins Psychotherapy an Relgious Values. Journal of Consulting and Clincal Psychology, 48, 635-639. Web. 7 Dec. 2013. Etxebarria, Itziar, M. Jose Ortiz, Susana Conejero, and Aitziber Pascual. "Intensity of Habitual Guilt in Men and Women: Differences in Interpersonal Sensitivity and the Tendency towards Anxious-Aggressive Guilt." The Spanish Journal of Psyhcology 12 (2009): 54054. Web. 24 Oct. 2013. Graham, Billy. "Guilt." The Billy Graham Christian Worker's Handbook. Minneapolis: World Wide Publications, 1996. Print. Griffin, Em. "Dramatism." A First Look at Communication Theory. 8th ed. New York: McGraw Hill, 2012. N. pag. Print. Piedmont, R. L. (1999). Does Spirituality Represent the Sixth Factor of Personality? Spiritual Transcendence and the Five-Factor Model. Journal of Pesonality, 67, 985-1013. Ratanasiripong, P.P. (1996). Effects of Culture and Religious Belief on Self-Conscious Emotions and Depression:Acculturation, self-construal, belief in grace, shame, guilt, and depression among Asian American and European American Protestants (Doctoral dissertation, The Wright Institute, Berkeley, CA). Dissertation Abstracts International, 57, 7235. Watson, P. J., Morris, R. J., & Hood, R. W. (1988). Sin and self-functioning, part 2: Grace, guilt and Psychological Adjustment. Journal of Psychology and Theology, 16, 270-281.