7 STEPS

TO

MANIFESTING

YOUR HEARTS DESIRES

CYNTHIA OCCELLI

7 STEPS TO MANIFESTING
YOUR HEART'S DESIRES

7 STEPS TO
MANIFESTING
YOUR HEART'S
DESIRES

CYNTHIA OCCELLI

Mood Pop, Inc.

Los Angeles

@ 2013 by Cynthia Occelli

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or
otherwise copied for public or private useother than fair use as
brief quotations embodied in articles and reviewswithout prior
written permission of the author.
The author of this book does not dispense medical advice or prescribe
the use of any technique as a form of treatment for physical,
emotional, or medical problems without the advice of a physician,
either directly or indirectly. The intent of the author is only to
offer information of a general nature to help you in your quest for
emotional and spiritual well-being.
This book was produced using PressBooks.com, and PDF rendering
was done by PrinceXML.

Contents

Also by Cynthia:
Preface
Who am I to write this book?

vi
vii

Universal Conspiracy
A Word on Co-creation & The Law of Attraction

Altitude
The Forest before the Trees

Space
Step One

Dream
Step Two

Commit
Step Three

14

Plan
Step Four

17

RRPs
Step Five

23

Action
Step Six

26

Persevere
Step Seven

32

iv

Afterword
Connect with Cynthia
About Cynthia

35
36
37

vi 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

Also by Cynthia:
Bo
Books
oks
Resurrecting Venus: Embrace Your Feminine Power
Inspired Living
Audio Guided Meditations
Guided Meditation for Beginners
Guided Meditation for Self Worth
Guided Meditation for Prosperity
Embrace Your Feminine Spirit Guided Meditation
Connect with Your Inner Goddess Guided Meditation

vi

Preface

Who am I to write this book?

I am humbled and honored to share this little book of big

things with you. These pages contain the secrets to my
success. Once you know them, youll see that much of the
magic of manifesting what you really want is clear, actionable
and under your direct control. Rather than a secret, youll
discover that having the deepest desires of your heart is the
predictable result of cultivating a fertile inner environment
and taking consistent, intelligent and inspired action. This
should bring you great reassurance because it means that you
have the power and the ability to manifest your dreams. All
you need is you.
Before you read further, I have one request: each time you
open this book, say this silently or out loud: The past is over.
My future is mine to create. I am the most powerful person in
my life. Refrain from mental conversations about whether
you can do this, or how youll take on something that might
scare, or intimidate you. You are here to create BIG dreams,

vii

viii 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

but dont worry, the road will incline gently and life will
conspire to help you all along the way. You are not alone. Be
mindful of your inner feelings and self-talk. If you feel
overwhelmed or fearful, you are likely dark-futurizing
(imagining a negative future development or outcome).
Release it and return to the present moment. Be here now.
All you must do, for the rest of your life, is handle this
moment. You can do this, you always have. Breathe. Accept
your worthiness and know that youre here to live out the
greatest expression of you. We are all cut from the same
cloth. Anything is possible for you.
Sharing the 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Hearts Desires with
you is incredibly fulfilling for me. It gives extraordinary
meaning to my life. The steps in this book were born from
years of enduring seemingly insurmountable challenges and
discovering what actually creates material and meaningful
change. Ive learned what works and, just as importantly,
what doesnt work. Ive lived out everything you will learn in
this book. There is nothing to wish, want or hope for here.
There are only result driven methods that anyone willing can
use. Years of coaching women who were ready to take
ownership and responsibility for their destiny has given me
an unshakable understanding of the power within us all. Its
time you consciously claim your role as the most powerful
person in your life. This has always been true, but claiming it
is a vital step in wielding the life-force within you. To bolster
your confidence and to help you expand your capacity to
dream, Im sharing my story with you. I want you to know
that if someone like me could create the romantic, financial,
physical life Ive always dreamed of living, you can too.

Preface ix

I grew up thinking that God made a mistake by creating me.

I was a biracial child and my father left before I was born. My
mom was a sixteen year old German immigrant who was
very much a child herself. My childhood was steeped in racial
and social discrimination. The prejudice in my community
and parts of my family was so strong that even I believed it
was the truth. I felt bad for being born, for being black and
for intruding on the lives of others.
The dominant theme of my childhood was insecurity and
inadequacy combined with a deep sense of inferiority for not
living up to the image of the ideal modern woman tough
and impenetrable. Blessedly, interspersed throughout the
chaos were wisps of love, light, and angels impersonating
animals and humans. They kept hope alive for me.
Although a gifted student, I dropped out of 9th grade and
surrounded myself with gang members, convicted felons,
drug dealers and teen-welfare moms people who were also
drowning in their miseries. By the time I was nineteen, I was
living in a garage on welfare and had just given birth to a
little boy. His father was incarcerated and I was still reeling
from the ravages of our relationship. I struggled to survive,
from welfare check to welfare check, and often couldnt
afford diapers.
My son gave me a life-changing gift: worth. It wasnt selfworth, I still believed I was wholly defective and undeserving
of good. I believed in his worth he was worthy of the
whole world. He deserved a happy, healthy home and a life of
opportunity. This ignited a flame inside of me.

x 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

My lifes transformation began with fantasies. Surrounded by

naysayers and seeming impossibility, I began to dream. To
escape the pain of my reality, Id fantasize visions of my son
and me living in Los Angeles, me getting an education,
having a beautiful home, marrying a man who really loved us
and being able to give my son everything Id never had.
Fast forward five years, my world had completely
transformed. I was living in Los Angeles, attending law
school, running a business and falling in love. Id begun to
recognize my power and inherent self-worth. I married a
wonderful man in a fairy tale wedding in the South of
France. We built our dream home in Bel Air, had a child
together and I graduated from law school (in the top 3% of
my class), never having finished high school or having an
undergraduate degree. I took up acting and modeling and
traveled the world. Not a single vestige of my life as a welfare
mom living in a garage remained.
At that time, I felt that Id achieved my lifes greatest triumph.
Id done what everyone said was impossible Id gone from
poverty and despair to success and happiness and it seemed
like the rest of my life would be one long ride into the sunset.
Life had a different plan, another lesson, another challenge, an
event powerful enough to shake loose every sense of
confidence, security, and peace Id worked so hard to
develop. One beautiful afternoon, my husband and I enjoyed
a leisurely lunch. That evening, I slid his wedding ring off of
his finger, as nurses prepared him for an emergency surgery.
Hed suffered a devastating brain hemorrhage. It washed
away his personality and our memories. After several
surgeries, he finally regained consciousness. It slowly became

Preface xi

apparent that our life together had been erased from his mind
and much of it would never return. Our marriage was over.
It was soul-ripping.
The following three years would be the most harrowing of
my life. People I loved abandoned me; the family Id adopted
as my own fell to infighting over money and fear. I learned
what it felt like to want to die. My heart was broken wide
open. I was devastated and pissed off at life. Old wounds of
unworthiness bled fresh and in the twisted thinking of
emotional turmoil, I concluded that my husbands devastating
loss was confirmation that I was in fact a mistake and God
wanted to make sure I knew that I was a lesser child.
I was a single mom again. This time I had a huge mortgage,
unattended businesses, neglected investments, grueling
lawsuits and a hole as big as the ocean in my heart. Life on
welfare in the garage became a longed for memory. On most
days, I got out of bed solely because of my children.
Those long dismal days sent me on a journey. I wanted to
understand why I existed. What was the point? Was there
any meaning to my life? A purpose? If so, what was it? I
wanted to know God personally, so I could ask for myself
instead of having another human cite scripture or predict
futures that never came to pass. I studied several religions and
immersed myself in spiritual teachings without regard for the
rules and righteousness of any of them. I meditated,
journaled, turned within and found a place of quiet. If Ive
ever had anything close to an epiphany, it happened when I
realized that I was the creator, maintainer and life-source of
my beliefs and theyd shaped my entire life. Nothing out
there could be against me until I joined in agreement with

xii 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

it. After years of searching for the truth, I found myself. It

was a powerful enlightenment and it set me free. God wasnt
doing anything to me. (S)He was doing what (S)He had
always done: be a force of infinite, unconditional, allencompassing love and beauty. God was changeless and that
wasnt going to change because of me.
The fires of those years were purposeful. They burned away
everything superfluous and left me free of limitation. From
the fertile soils of charred earth, I planted the seeds of my new
life. I knew exactly what I was here for: to live out my
deepest desires and show others the way to freedom without
having to endure their own ravaging fire. I am here to live
my greatest expression and walk beside you, helping you
clear the path to yours.
I am living my dreams. Today, my son attends one of the
finest universities in the world; my daughter is the fifteenyear-old we all should have been free, inspired, loved and
conscious of her inherent worth. I live in my dream home
the same house I built in Bel Air. I am surrounded by
people who actively love me. My life is harmonious. I
recognize myself as a beautiful person who leaves most people
better off for knowing me. I was created on purpose. I belong
and I am safe. My focus now is to connect others, primarily
women, with two truths I know for sure: 1) You are the most
powerful person in your life; 2) You are hardwired to be
drawn to and have your hearts deepest desires.
Ive lived my whole life preparing to share this with you. It is
my pleasure, honor and purpose. Thank you for finding me.

Universal Conspiracy
A Word on Co-creation & The Law of
Attraction

Most of this book speaks to your part in creating your hearts

desires. Its important to note that you are a partner in all you
create. You are not alone and you wont be creating your
desires by yourself. There is an energetic system of
confirmation and support in everything and it will aid you in
magnetizing or creating your true desires.
You can call it whatever you like or nothing at all.
Many people are familiar with these ideas and call them the
law of attraction, law of correspondence, or just like
attracting like.
Confusion arises when we think that we dont have to do
anything or contribute to the manifestation of our dreams,
but think about it, if we had no part to play, it wouldnt be a
co-creation.
There is no cosmic vending machine, you are the most
powerful person in your life and you have an active role to
take if you want to live your dreams.
I liken it to gardening. Gardening requires much work on
the part of the gardener.

2 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

You must choose the right spot for your plants, so they have
the right amount of light, you must till the soil, plant the
seeds, water them, feed them, weed around them, and make
sure no parasites destroy them. Yet, you arent the energetic
source of the seeds growth and without that energetic source
you couldnt have a plant, but without your work your
garden wouldnt exist. Its a true co-creation.

Altitude
The Forest before the Trees

Below are the 7 Steps to Manifesting the Deepest Desires of

your heart. Please refer to each section for a detailed
discussion. Sometimes it helps to see all the steps in one place,
so that youre less inclined to wander in your thinking. To
get the most out of each section, it is vital that you immerse
yourself in the action steps, exercises and practices that come
in each section. Taking action is the difference between ideas
and results. No matter how tempted you are to think them
out and move on, dont! Use focus and self discipline to make
sure you follow through. This is your life and the choices you
make when using this book will dictate the outcome. Give it
your all.
1)

Space.

2)

Dream.

3)

Commit.

4)

Plan.

5)

RRPs.

6)

Action.

7)

Persevere.

Space
Step One

The first step in creating your dreams is to clear away what

no longer serves you, takes up space and/or could block your
creative efforts. Its also vital to reflect and take inventory of
the last year of your life. Imagine planting the seeds of your
dreams among a crowd of weeds and plants that produce
something other than what youve chosen for your life. Your
dreams would have to fight to receive the sunlight, water and
nutrients required to grow. If they managed to grow through
the adversity, theyd be smaller and shaped by their
environment. This is exactly how most people approach new
goals and changes. They start wherever they are and look for
future challenges, while paying little attention to whats
already in the way.
Take some time to look back over last year, see it globally,
and sort through it. Observe yourself, in a non judgmental,
curious way and ask where youve helped yourself or others,
and where you feel you missed the mark. This is important
information and it will help you as you move forward.
Heartwork #1:
Write the answers to the following questions.
1. Were the last 12 months good for you? Why?

Space 5

2. What did you do well?

3. What could you have done better?
4. List the things that moved you forward (emotionally,
physically, financially, in relationships, self-esteem level).
5. List the things that moved you away from your good.
6. Who enriched your life?
7. What relationships were depleting or harmful?
8. What thought or thoughts played most in your mind?
9. Describe each month of the last year with one word, phrase
or sentence.
Heartwork #2:
Study the answers for the hidden gems, the things that made
you better, stronger, more alive. Note the things that brought
you down and caused you suffering.
In hindsight, what could you have done differently to support
and help yourself more?
Be kind.
Youll notice that who you were 12 months ago is not the
same person you were 6 months ago, and who you are now
is also different. This is proof that no matter what you do,
you are always changing. Instead of letting this change happen
automatically, by reaction or by default, this work will help
you consciously choose and influence the direction of your
growth. Go slow, dig in and mine your answers for

6 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

experiences, actions and people who you associate good

feelings with. When you feel good, you are exponentially
more powerful. As you move forward, your focus will be to
increase the good feelings in your life and reduce your time
spent around situations, environments, activities and people
who deplete your energy or leave you feeling weak.
Evaluate any optional projects or activities that arent
resonating with good feelings. Free up space for new and
better things by ending those which dont serve your highest
good. Become an active and conscious observer of where
your time, thoughts and energy may be leaking out of your
lifeeliminate energy wastes. Tie off any loose strands of
things you started and want to finish. Throw out all of the
things that held you back, cluttered your thinking, or held you
in upset or unforgiveness over the last year.
The truth is its all over, the year is gone; it doesnt exist
anymore. All that remains is what you keep alive in your
mind. Let all that does not serve you go, now.
Next, let go of all the reasons things might or must turn out
badly for you. Theres nothing true or factual about those
thoughts; they are just vapors and opinions that feel real when
we focus on them. When you use the past to argue for your
limitations, you tie both hands behind your back and blind
yourself to opportunities that could lead you to your hearts
desires. Release and let go.
For support read the chapters: Surrender Victimhood and
Forgiveness is Freedom, in Resurrecting Venus.
Gather the wisdom and the joyful memories of the last year.
Ultimately, your goal is to take only the good stuff with you.

Space 7

Let only the treasures remain. Love and give thanks for all the
good, all of the lessons learned. The past does not define the
future and you have everything you need to become your best
self and create the deepest desires of your heart.
Make your physical world receptive to the dreams youll be
creating by cleaning and clearing out your physical space too.
Do a little at a time. Get rid of all you no longer use, want or
need. Let someone else benefit from it. As you clean and clear,
remind yourself that your outer actions reflect your inner
work. The more space you make, the more good can come
your way.
Note: If you have a habit of thinking pessimistic thoughts,
you may catch yourself immersed in old thoughts that youve
decided to release. Be gentle and patient with yourself. When
you become aware of your mind reliving or rehashing
something that is not on the treasure list, kindly remind
yourself that youve decided to let it go, and then ask: What
do I really want? Shift your focus and follow the answer to
your bliss. Habits are thoughts repeated over and over again.
Give yourself time to make new ones. You are not your habits
and your habits are not prescient, but they are self-fulfilling,
so learn to observe and instill new and empowering thought
habits.
At the end of this process you will be freer, wiser, infused
with fresh energy and a clearer perspective. This is the ideal
foundation for conscious creation of your hearts desires.

Dream
Step Two

In the last step you created fertile, nurturing soils, and the
space to plant the seeds of your deepest desires. Now its time
to dream! Give yourself permission to dream fearlessly and
without judgment. Affirm that you are worthy of living a life
that feels good and makes you happy. Nothing is too good for
you and the limit of what is possible for you is YOU. Dream
BIG.
In Resurrecting Venus, I wrote extensively about processes
that have helped me clarify and focus my dreams. Here are
selections from Chapter 44, Conceive Your Dream, Please
refer to that chapter now, before continuing.
If youve read Chapter 44 of Resurrecting Venus you now
understand the power and energy of a well crafted vision
board. It bears noting that sometimes you may put something
on the board that doesnt match up to what youll later choose
in life. Thats perfectly okay. We are ever-changing beings.
If you struggle to find something that resonates with your
center, set a full month aside with regular dream exploration
sessions. Get quiet, meditate (the Embrace Your Feminine
Power Guided Meditation is perfect for this), trace the path
back to your earliest memories. What made your child self feel
joyful, free and happy to be alive? The answer is nearly always
related to dreams that would bring you great fulfillment and

Dream 9

joy today. Patiently explore and write down what you

discover. Your deepest dreams may elude you if youre
desperately grasping at them. Stillness, relaxation and peace
open the channels to your inner-world. Cultivate quiet.
Heartwork #1
For a moment, release your dreams, desires and troubles. Let
go of all the things you think you need to be happy. If you got
the job, car, deal, or won the lottery, but had to live in Siberia
to have it, chances are good that you wouldnt be happy. Its
not the stuff that will bring you joy. Thank your way to
heaven on earth by appreciating the abundance all around
you. Start with the trillions of cells working hard to serve you
right now. Be grateful for your mind and every single ability
you have. Give thanks for the surplus of air, light, water and
plants in the world. Give thanks for everyone who has ever
loved you and send loving thoughts to all those you love.
Leave the details, stories, and challenges behind. Count only
the good. From this peaceful state of gratitude, ask your heart
to tell you what you really desire.
Heartwork #2
When you feel as though youve caught the vision of what
you want to manifest, take a moment to test the seeds. Save
yourself the disappointing experience of cultivating what you
thought you wanted and then realizing that deep down its
not at all what your true self wanted. As I mentioned in
Resurrecting Venus, sometimes our dreams belong to others.
They can also belong to our egos. The egos dreams will not
bring lasting satisfaction. They are the dreams that consume

10 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

us as we pursue them, and even if we do attain them, we feel

unfulfilled, unsatisfied and yearning for meaning.
Try this simple test to determine whether your dream is really
your hearts desire. Ask:
Would you still want your dream if no one else ever saw or
knew about it?
Or, in the case of work or an experience that involves others,
would you still want to do it, if you received no money for it?*
*By no means am I saying that money isnt important, but if
money is the sole reason you want to do something, its not
your hearts desire. Your heart needs joy. The most viable,
enduring, and rewarding creations are those that spring from
our hearts.
If youve read this section and done your Heartwork, chances
are high that youve identified your hearts deepest desires. If
youre still not sure of what you want or whether its right for
you, go back to the beginning of this section, read it through
and give yourself the time and space to discover the wisdom
within you. Whenever you conceive a new dream, create a
detailed mental movie of you having just what you want.
Make it vivid and sensory. Fill it with the colors, sounds, scents
and words that you want to hear. The act of creating a vision
primes your mind to unconsciously gather all information and
opportunities in your environment that could lead you to your
dreams. You notice and create more of whatever you focus on.
Im an only child and I spent a lot of time alone growing
up. This turned out to have some real benefits. As a result of
spending so much time alone, I developed a rich and powerful

Dream 11

imagination. As a young mom, Id lie in bed staring at the

garages splintered ceiling and imagine myself living in a
beautiful home in my favorite city, Los Angeles. We even had
a swimming pool. I imagined my son going to a great school,
and me getting an education, and becoming financially selfreliant. In my fantasies I felt beautiful and was surrounded by
people who genuinely liked me. I was in love with a kind and
caring man. My son and I were safe and all was well. I often
fell asleep this way and Id escape to these fantasies when my
days were exceptionally challenging.
At that time, I had no idea of the power I was wielding. Those
intense imaginings laid a foundation for change. I started to
behave more like the me in my day dreams and my attention
was taken off of all of the things I didnt want or like, and
instead focused on what I wanted. The act of thinking of
myself feeling wonderful gave me more energy and opened
my mind up to broader, more perceptive thoughts.
I began to see opportunity where I couldnt before. I also
began to recognize the places I hadnt shown up for myself
in the past and all the ways Id undervalued myself and given
my power away. Slowly, I started to realize that the past did
not have to dictate my future. This triggered a shift in my
expectations; I started to believe that the life I wanted existed
in my future, even though nothing around me had changed. I
felt hopeful and eager.
Set your mind on the trail of your hearts desires and like
a blood hound it will pick up and follow the scent. Make
a practice of dreaming. Develop a picture and a sensory
experience of your best self living the life of your deepest
desires. Each day, feed your vision with your imagination

12 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

and energy. Let your vision be what you fall asleep with
and return to it first thing in the morning. This powerful
process marshals energy and points it in a unified direction.
This intense, hyper-focused power is the thread with which
we weave our dreams.
A Caveat:
Now that youve identified your hearts desire and planted
the seeds, its time to keep it a secret. There will never be a
shortage of people to argue for your limitations. They arent
telling you your story, they are telling you theirs. If you agree
with them, it becomes your story too. Only share your dreams
and vision board with people who have the expertise to help
you in creating your vision, or who genuinely want to see you
succeed. This is always a smart strategy, but especially in the
beginning, when dreams are new, its vital that you protect
and nurture them until they become viable creations.
When making and using your board, be choosy about who
sees it before your dreams come to fruition. Dreams are like
embryos, they need constant nourishment and protection, if
they are going to be born and survive. I rarely share my
board or dreams with anyone outside of my closest confidants,
who I know will not judge or criticize them. Let the energy
of creation build and accumulate around your hearts desires.
When you share your dreams for no reason other than to
include someone else, you run the risk of diluting vital energy,
or even cutting off the flow. If they share their fears, doubts,
and limiting beliefs with you, they may inadvertently derail
your confidence. That said, I have found it beneficial to share
my vision with one absolutely committed fan. This person can
be anyone, so long as they are fiercely supportive of you and

Dream 13

willing to hold the space for your highest good. I share my

dreams with one person who has an unshakable belief in me
and desires my success. I do this because I know that I will
not always feel strong and confident. If I get discouraged or
my vision weakens, this person is still holding my vision and
supporting me. Everything we create exists first in the mind. I
want my dreams to always be alive in at least one mind other
than mine.

Commit
Step Three

The third step in creating your dreams is: to fully commit

to doing whatever it takes to achieve them, as long as you
harm no one, including yourself. This total commitment is
absolutely necessary and if you arent willing to make it,
success may elude you.
W. H. Murray expressed this idea so beautifully when he said:
Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw
back concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is
one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless
ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely
commits oneself, then Providence moves too. All sorts of
things occur to help one that would never otherwise have
occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision,
raising in ones favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and
meetings and material assistance, which no man could have
dreamed would have come his way.
Life will conspire to help you when you make a real
commitment to your dream. Your commitment sends a signal
to the Universe, saying I am here, and I am willing to face
my fears, and step all the way out of my comfort zone to do
my part in this co-creation.

14

Commit 15

The challenge that comes up when we make this commitment

is we come face to face with our fears.
For example, your dream may be to have a business and youre
confident in your skills, services or products you know that
anyone who buys from you will be enriched, but youre afraid
of selling, or asking investors for money to start-up or grow.
Unless and until you overcome this fear, it will hold you back.
Affirm to yourself and to Creation that you are willing and
able to do whatever it takes to create what you want, and
all you have to do all you can ever do is handle this
moment. You can handle this particular moment, this step on
the path. Place your focus here, take the one step in front of
you and then handle the next moment. Keep your focus on the
current step and moment, instead of futurizing an experience
of fear. In my personal experiences and my work as a coach
Ive learned that the nightmare scenarios we create when we
futurize are far more frightful than living through the actual
experience of what were imagining. How many times have
you imagined how terrible something was going to be, and
then afterward remarked: oh, it wasnt as bad as I thought?
It could have been even better if youd used your energy
positively, instead of investing in dread.
One of the most effective ways to eliminate a fear is to do the
thing you fear you cannot. Get started. Be kind and gentle
with yourself. Take small bites. If your goal is to teach and
share your knowledge and wisdom with thousands of people,
and youre afraid of public speaking, start with a small casual
group, give a joint talk, sit on a panel, then take the next step,
all the while being willing to grow and step further outside of

16 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

your comfort zone. Remember you must be open and willing

to do whatever it takes.
Let it be okay if you dont have all the answers. Its okay to say:
I dont know, but Ill find out. Its okay to make mistakes. Its
okay to be wrong. People appreciate someone who can accept
when theyre wrong, or have made a mistake, appreciate the
correction, and keep going. These are the people we come
to trust. Innately we know that no one is perfect, yet we
somehow expect perfection from ourselves.
Heartwork #1
Imagine yourself doing something that will help you
magnetize your dream, but scares or intimidates you. Flip your
perspective and see yourself thriving and doing well. Create
a clear experience of the people involved really seeing your
authenticity, potential and value.
Weve reached the point where the linear, step-by-step
approach weve followed thus far gives way to the wild divine
and the first of several paradoxes emerge. Dont resist the
contradictions or attempt to fit them into a logical format.
Remember your agreement to suspend doubt and judgment?
If you accept these paradoxes as the natural and normal result
of co-creating with a friendly Universe, youll do just fine.
Paradox #1: Once you make a genuine, nothing held back
commitment to do whatever it takes to create your dreams,
you will find that your dreams work hard to come to you. You
wont have to actually do all of whatever it takes, but theres
no fooling the Universe or yourself; youve got to go all in.

Plan
Step Four

The fourth step in creating your hearts desires is to develop

a plan with actionable steps. Having a plan helps us to get
where were going. Its our map and will help us identify what
actions are most related to our goals and what isnt important.
It also helps us to stay on track.
Plans can be simple or complex, anything from a page to
fifty pages. Unless youre writing a business plan to submit to
potential investors (in which case I strongly advise you to hire
a professional), get creative and use whatever mediums and
formats work to bring you greater clarity and connection to
your dreams.
Start with a mission or purpose statement to create the
environment and container for your dream. A mission
statement is commonly a statement that articulates the main
aims and intentions of a business.
For example, ASG Real Estate, a Los Angeles Broker who
focuses on helping families and investors navigate the
quagmire of foreclosures, short-sales, and other distressed
properties has a very short and simple mission statement: To
be unusually helpful.
By contrast, Whole Foods Incs mission statement is much
longer and more detailed:

17

18 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

We believe that companies, like individuals, must assume their

share of responsibility as tenants of Planet Earth.
We actively support organic farming, the best method for promoting
sustainable agriculture and protecting farm workers and the
environment. We also aim to protect the environment by supporting
alternative sources of energy and by recycling or composting our
waste. We are actively involved in our communities by supporting
food banks, sponsoring neighborhood events, and contributing at
least 5% of total net profits to not-for-profit organizations.
Our vision of a sustainable future means our children and
grandchildren will be living in a world that values human creativity,
diversity, and individual choice.
Our whole business is about making a difference in the lives
of our Team Members and the customers we serve, and in the
communities and environments in which we operate.
(http://www.wholefoodsmarket.com/careers/our-missionand-culture)
The power of a mission statement is well understood. Once
you have one that reflects your deepest intentions and desires,
youll have a powerful mechanism for evaluating whether
a contemplated action supports your ultimate vision. If it
doesnt, youll know what not to do which is as valuable
as knowing what to do. Here are some examples of personal
mission statements:
To create a life of ease and balance while pursuing my passion for
creative expression.

Action 19

To live a life of love and beauty and share it with the world by
creating beautiful things.
I am a leader in my family, business, and community. I use my
gifts of intelligence and compassion to motivate myself and others to
reach their greatest potential.
I am a citizen of the world. I create productions and services that
spread laughter around the world.
Mission statements dont have to be for your whole lifetime.
Aim for five years.
Though your mission may affect or involve others, keep it
general. Mission statements that involve a specific individual
are really goals that require a reaction or response from an
individual to be successful. This is overstepping your power
(except in the case of young children). Make you and your life
the focus of your mission statement.
Keep it simple. You dont need to spell out every aspect of
your mission, although you can. Keep in mind that simple is
easy to remember and you dont have to call every detail or
aspect of your intention out. Embodying a positive mission
statement will improve all areas of your life. Rising tides lift all
boats.
The right mission statement will cause a change in your
internal state. It will make you feel something positive in your
body (inspiration, excitement, knowing, confidence). Your
body is wiser than we comprehend; it always knows the right
path.

20 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

Remember to keep your mission statement to yourself, at

least at first. Mission statements start out as tender seedlings
that require your nurturing and protection. Let your mission
statement take root and gain strength before you share it with
others.
My mission statement:
To meaningfully and materially improve lives, including
mine, by using every wondrous and soul-ripping experience
Ive had to create good.
This statement rescues me on emotionally stormy days and
makes every article, radio show, conversation, and email
tremendously important to me. In every moment, I am clear
about my objective and consequently I dont get lost in
tempting, but off target tangents.
Heartwork #1
Craft your mission statement. Let it take form organically. It
will change several times before you hit on the one most true
for you. Once you have a statement that resonates with you,
write it on a card and tuck it into your wallet. Whenever
youre waiting in line, are bored, or have a few minutes
between activities, pull out the card and reflect on your
mission. It will change you and your life. Let it be your
guiding light.
Next, create a plan of action. Do this even if you have no idea
how to get where you want to go.
Heartwork #2

Action 21

Imagine yourself at the place of your big dreams manifested,

now look backward in time and ask: How did I get here?
Trace the path from your realized desire to you in the present
moment. What transpired between there and here? Write it
down, no matter how silly or unrealistic it seems. Then ask
the question again. Document every answer and idea. This
exercise always reveals new and valuable actions.
Heartwork #3
Find a mentor. Look out into the world for examples of people
who are living your dreams and study how they got there.
You dont have to do everything they did and youll do things
in a way thats unique to you, but this information can be very
useful. Most people are willing to share their insights if you
ask them. Its flattering and most people really do enjoy giving
back; reach out to them.
Heartwork #4
Hire a coach or find a positive and motivated friend and set
up a mini-mastermind group. Once a week, get together or
have a call, and take turns sharing what youre working on,
brainstorm action steps, and report your progress over the last
week. (I do this weekly with my friend and book writing
coach Robin Colucci. Its powerful.)
Paradox #2 Work hard to craft a plan of clear action steps
and at the same time dont be worried about what you dont
know, and dont get attached to your plan, because things
nearly always take a different route than you plan.
Ive spent a great deal of time with people who take planning
so seriously, that when they cant see how something will

22 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

work out from the very beginning, they call the objective
impossible and let it go. This shuts nearly every dream down.
Show up, do your best and let the Universe (God, Spirit,
Light) take care of the rest.
For example, I had an entire plan around becoming an author
and not one thing went as planned, yet here I am, and the way
it unfolded is better than anything Id planned.
I was a blogger, and through blogging I learned that I really
love writing; and it allowed me to achieve my lifes mission
without needing anyone else to choose me. From there I
decided that I would build an online social media presence, so
I would have an audience for the books I wanted to write. Id
planned a two pronged approach, I would send query letters
to literary agents and follow the traditional publishing route
(author gets agent then agent sells book to publisher) and,
simultaneously, I would grow my online community, so I
could self-publish my books. As I was focusing on building
my online presence through blogging, Tony Berkman
(genius, sweetheart and owner of blog catalog) put my blog
on the front page of his site.
I was thrilled because it really advanced the second prong of
my approach, it built my online presence which would really
help me to self-publish. Yet, what resulted was completely
unplanned. A publisher saw my blog, contacted me directly,
and published Resurrecting Venus! To this day I still dont
have a literary agent. Nothing went as planned at all. But
having the plan caused me to take the actions and create the
channels for the Universe to flow through.

RRPs
Step Five

The fifth step in creating your dreams is to develop routines,

rituals, and practices (RRPs) that feed your commitment to
your goal and your motivation to take continuous action.
New dreams are delicate and its easy for the demands of life
to draw you in and weaken your connection to your dreams.
Sometimes fear comes masked as busyness or procrastination
when, in actuality, youre really pulling back to avoid the
risk of failure, success, or criticism. When you allow your
energetic focus to wane, or focus more on your fear than
the positive and wonderful feelings of creating your dreams,
they will fall into suspended animation into the category of
someday. Powerful RRPs guard against these devolutions by
stoking your energy and maintaining your connection to the
positive feelings and motivations behind your desires. They
strengthen you and diminish the dream dashing effects of fear.
Your perfect RRPs are unique to you and to be effective they
must be enjoyable and easy.
If possible, carve out an hour each day for your rituals but no
less than 15 minutes. Observe any resistance that comes up
as you read this instruction. Acknowledge that if something
important emerged in your life and required this time, youd
accommodate it. Make this important.

23

24 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

Here are a selection of RRPs that Ive used with tremendous

success.
Meditate. I strongly encourage you to listen to my Connect
with Your Inner Goddess Guided Mediation. It will shore
up your connection to your center and intuitive wisdom. If
your hearts desire involves prosperity and abundance, visit
my YouTube Channel and watch my Guided Meditation for
Prosperity (http://bit.ly/178M8pS). Both of these meditations
have helped me and many others shift their inner environment
to one of powerful possibility, worthiness and wisdom.
Move. Shift and release the energy in your body. Choose an
exercise that works to release stressful and stagnant energy
from your body. Yoga is my favorite choice, but its important
that you choose something that feels good to you. Dedicate
your practice to your goal or intention, or to all the people
who will benefit from you successfully creating your dream.
Swoon. Choose a theme song for your dream and listen to
it every day, especially when you need energy. When I was
getting off of welfare, my theme song was Mariah Careys
Make It Happen. When I graduated from law school and
took on my fear of acting, my song was Diana Rosss Im
Coming Out. They changed my emotional state immediately
and still do.
Soak. Make bathing a ritual. If you have a tub, fill it with
warm water, organic flower essences, oils and sea salts. Relax
and reflect on how youre showing up in your life. What
would you like to do differently? What do you no longer
need? In your minds eye, see everything that doesnt serve

RRP's 25

you being drawn out by the salt, purified, and washed down
the drain.
Journal. If youre familiar with the Harry Potter series, you
know about Dumbledores pensive a glass bowl filled with
memories. Dumbledore places his wand next to his head and
draws out a silvery wisp of memory and places it in the pensive
for safe keeping. Let your journal serve as your pensive. Write
a note every day about your hearts desire. Write an action you
took or plan to take, a hope or fear. Write a note to yourself
reassuring and appreciating your steadfast commitment to
you. In time, youll come to love your journal and it will stand
as proof of how much youve grown and how far youve gone.
Flame. Say a prayer or claim your desire as being birthed into
manifestation and light a candle. Let the flame represent and
sustain your dream.
Two. Make an intelligent exception to the keeping dreams
secret rule. Share your vision with someone who will hold the
space for its easy manifestation. This person can be anyone,
so long as they are fiercely supportive of you and desiring of
your highest good. You are human and you will not always
feel strong and confident. When you get discouraged or your
vision weakens, your confidant will still be holding your
vision and supporting you. This ensures that a constant supply
of energy is infusing your dream.
Heartwork #1
Choose an RRP from above or create your own.

Action
Step Six

The sixth step in manifesting your desires is to take consistent

action toward your goals and adapt to changes along the way.
The importance of this step cannot be overestimated. We live
in a physical universe. As such, we create in thought and
manifest through action.
Take at least one action toward the attainment of your dreams
every day. When youre busy or stressed, make the action
small (send an email, gather information, learn about a person
doing what you want to do, make a call just do something).
Small steps taken consistently over time add up and create
substantial results.
Even just 15 minutes of focused action a day amounts to 91+
hours a year. Imagine the positive change you could create in
91 hours. Now imagine if on some days you devoted two or
three focused hours to your hearts desires. In one years time,
your whole world will change.
The key word when talking about action is: focused. When
we devote all of our attention to one thing, our productivity
skyrockets. Many people hear the word productivity and
get turned off because it sounds like miserable work, the kind
championed in business school and corporate seminars, but
when you view productivity as synonymous with birthing

26

Action 27

your deepest desires, youll realize the pleasures of being

productive.
The keys to high productivity are: 1) calendar whats
important to you and; 2) single-task. Your calendar is your
ticket to freedom. I know it feels just the opposite, but give it
a month and your productivity and free time will sky-rocket.
If youre like most people, you spend a lot of time thinking
about what needs to be done. You plan in your head and
when something new comes up, you move your mental plans
around and figure out how to accommodate it. To make sure
you dont lose track of your objectives, you run your plans
through your mind often and may make to do lists that cause
you to spend more time on the mental planning. All of this
mental planning feels like work. It eats up time, lulls you into
thinking youve done something, and takes energy. You can
spend a whole day thinking of what youre going to do for the
rest of the month and telling others that you have no time for
new meetings or opportunities. Learning to use and maintain
your calendar will end all these mental machinations forever.
Youll know exactly when youre going to do what and youll
be able to see that youve made time for everything you want
to do. Prioritize and work on what has the greatest power to
move you towards your goal. Ask yourself: what one action
would advance my objective the most? Be discerning. Will
spending hours perfecting a letter move you further along
than calling someone who has the power to say yes to you?
Make a choice, calendar it and follow through.
Before we move on, I want to give you a very powerful tip:
be okay with not getting things that dont advance your goals
done. Be okay with mistakes and imperfections. Keep moving
forward. Perfection is grossly overrated. Show up, strive for

28 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

excellence and take the next step. You will make mistakes,
things wont be 100% perfect, but theyll be close and youll be
moving forward. The only people who never make mistakes,
get criticized, or fall are those who do NOTHING.
I was exceptionally resistant to adopting a calendar. I am a
rebel at heart and despise conforming to rules and systems.
For me, this changed when I recognized that the only things
that go on my calendar are things I choose to put there.
Calendaring your life makes sure you tend to your priorities,
both professional and personal, and it frees up precious time
and energy.
The next boon to your productivity is to surrender the idea of
multi-tasking. Multi-tasking feels busy and it makes our ego
feel like we must be very important because were so busy, but
its proven that when we are multi-tasking we are the least
productive. When you devote all of your attention to one task,
that task will be completed faster and better than when you
split your attention.
Before you begin single-tasking, do what you can to eliminate
interruptions and distractions. They create the same poor
performance that multi-tasking does. Theres a Microsoft
study of workers, that found that, on average, they were
interrupted about four times an hour, and 40% of the time
they did not return to the task they were working on. The
bottom line is things dont get done when were multitasking, being interrupted, or getting distracted.
Help yourself by creating an environment that supports your
success. Eliminate interruptions in advance by turning all
phones off, closing the internet, closing your email, telling the

Action 29

people around you that you cannot be disturbed for the next
hour, or however much time you need.
When something interrupts you while working, swiftly
address it by telling them that youll be available at a specific
time and dont engage in chit chat; be direct and get back
to work. Granted, there are times when something cant be
ignored, but the majority of the time this isnt the case. Learn
to set healthy boundaries, so that you have the peace and
privacy to pursue your passions.
Heres a Q&A from my radio show that articulates the
importance of unapologetically setting and upholding clear
boundaries:
Celia asked: I am finding that in order for me to pursue my dreams,
I have to cut back on other things in my life, such as spending time
with friends, and I am having a hard time with this, because I cant
say no and feel guilty when I hurt peoples feelings. Do you have
any advice for me?
Well, dear Celia, I do.
First, understand your why (your reason for cutting back on friend
time). You are cutting back because you have dreams and goals, and
if you hang around with your friends, instead of expressing what is
seeking to come through you, you might regret it for the rest of your
life. You want to experience the joy of living out whats in your
heart. You want to honor the gifts and dreams you were sent here
with. You want to discover the best in you. Thats your why and
its monumental.

30 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

Second, if your friends are really friends, and I am assuming they

are, they love you and will understand and support you in pursuing
your desires. Share this with them, you will feel better and you
may even inspire them to connect with their own dreams. The shift
doesnt have to be drastic. You dont have to stop hanging out all
together, just make your dreams a priority and create a habit of
putting work before play. There are studies that show that those who
delay gratification are more successful than those who do not.
Next, you must learn how to say no. You must feel comfortable
saying it whenever you really want to. If you have to choose between
not giving someone what they want and going against yourself, the
choice should be easy, theyll have to handle themselves while you
take your own side and support yourself in doing what is right
for you. This is key in building self-confidence and self-trust. How
to say no: say it and stop talking. Be light and kind, and get
comfortable with silence (silently sing the alphabet if you have to).
Saying no is not synonymous with saying I hate you or being
hurtful. Its just no. If you really want to give an explanation when
you say no, you can, but keep it super short and dont make it a
habit. You dont have to explain yourself or justify why you choose
to honor your desires.
Finally, dump the whole idea of feeling guilty for hurting their
feelings. Guilt is a toxic emotion which produces nothing good for
anyone. Remorse is appropriate where you regret harming another,
but there is no harm here. This is a great time to mention Bronnie
Ware, who spent years as a hospice nurse caring for dying people.
In her book, The Top Five Regrets of the Dying, she shares that the
number one regret of the dying is: I wish Id had the courage to live
a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

Action 31

In sum, your dreams are certain to manifest when you take

consistent action, prioritize and calendar it, single-task,
eliminate interruptions, set and uphold healthy boundaries. A
massive side benefit of adopting these practices is that they
build the muscles of self-confidence, trust, and perseverance.
These are the holy grails of success.

Persevere
Step Seven

The seventh step in creating your dreams is to persevere.

Perseverance is defined as steady persistence in a course of
action, a purpose, a state, etc., especially in spite of difficulties,
obstacles, or discouragement.
Ive had several experiences and worked with many people
who, at times, appeared to be destined for endless failure
nothing seemed to work, they felt defeated, and people said
theyd never make it but by persevering they found success.
The following quote hangs in my kitchen, for my children
and me to see every day:
Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will
not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent.
Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education
will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and
determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan Press On! has
solved and always will solve the problems of the human race.
Calvin Coolidge
Learn to collect nos as a means of getting to yes. The
worlds most successful people have experienced the most
rejections. Here are some examples:

32

Persevere 33

J.K. Rowling was rejected by 12 publishers before the 13th

gave her a measly $3,000 advance and agreed to publish Harry
Potter and the Sorcerers Stone.
At 511 and 165 lbs, Wayne Gretzsky was deemed too small
and slow for professional hockey.
James Redfield couldnt get The Celestine Prophecy
published by publishers (so he did it himself). It has sold 20
million copies worldwide.
Jack London received more than 600 rejection letters.
A young Barbara Walters was advised by a CBS executive to
Stay out of television.
Eddie Arcaro (Secretariat jockey) lost 250 races before
winning.
Stephen Spielberg was rejected by UCLAs & USCs film
schools.

Paradox #3
To co-create with the Universe we must persevere by giving
all we have to our desired goal and, at the very same time,
we must surrender and let go of the outcome. This always
causes much consternation from my coaching clients. They
ask: How can I live full out and put my everything into
something and, at the same time, let go of how it turns out?
This is the very nature of co-creating. You are responsible for
your part, and the Universe has its own ways, reasons, and

34 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

wisdom. Trust it. When things dont go the way you plan,
suspend doubt and judgment. Trust that something better will
come, or that youve been spared something unwanted, or that
you may not be ready yet. Trust in the wisdom and support
of the Infinite, and a good greater than you could foresee will
emerge.
Persevere and let go. Ive had many experiences I perceived
as failures, but without fail a time comes in the future when
the purpose of the event becomes clear. Often the intense
energy we expend clinging to something is the single greatest
obstacle to our good. It makes us plot, manipulate and attempt
to control life something that rarely succeeds, and if it
appears to succeed, often backfires. It also interferes with our
inner state, it blocks energy and stops flow. Most upset is
derived from our unwillingness to accept or release
something. Like holding water, the tighter we grasp, the less
we have. We greatly improve our lives and results by letting it
go.
Letting go also does not mean giving up. It means that we take
our frenetic, chaotic energy out of the picture and release our
attachment to the outcome. If you believe in a force greater
than you (God, Spirit, Universal Energy etc.), letting go is an
act of surrender to the power responsible for beating hearts
and suspending the planets in the sky, surely it can handle your
concerns.

Afterword
What Ive learned, after decades of practicing and teaching the
principles in this book, is:
When you stand in grace, chart your course and set sail toward
your hearts desires, the Universe will turn the tides in the
direction of your greatest good.
No desire that emanates from your heart is too good, too
unrealistic, or too much to create. Theres no such thing as too
late, and nothing is impossible for you.
This is your time.

35

Connect with Cynthia

Stay Connected!
www.ResurrectingVenus.com
www.facebook.com/LIFEblog
www.twitter.com/CynthiaOccelli
www.YouTube.com/CynthiaOccelli
Listen to the Resurrecting Venus Show on Hay House Radio
www.hayhouseradio.com

36

About Cynthia

Ive read literally thousands of self empowerment and spiritual

books. Invariably, Ive wondered whether the author was
writing about their truth. I wanted to glimpse into their
private spaces and see if they lived their messages as perfectly
as presented. A few times, I was able to interact with wildly
popular authors in private settings and what I witnessed shook
me. I discovered that they were human, not the perfect people
their writings portrayed. At first, it bothered me. I felt misled
for not being shown the whole picture. Soon, I realized the
unfairness inherent in my reaction. I took the authors off of
the pedestals Id placed them on and embraced them as people
just like me.

37

38 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

I dont want to be put on any pedestals either. So I chose to

take this space, traditionally reserved for impressing you with
my achievements, and give you a peek into my world, so that
youll know that I am human, too. Just like you.
Not every day is a wonderful day for me. Sometimes, Im
tired, impatient, and have no interest in seeing another human
being. I am not a perfect mother, daughter, lover, or friend,
but most of the time I endeavor to be and sometimes, Im just
grumpy. I cry, get angry, and on occasion the world gets the
best of me, and I take a soak in victimhood. On the positive
side, these moments dont last very long anymore. I read my
own books and blogs and the instant I am able, I walk my talk.
Im not perfect, but I like me.
I am driven to rescue wild and domestic animals in traffic, and
because I often work in my pajamas and wear them to pick
up my daughter, you may well see me flailing about in the
streets of Los Angeles, trying to catch a shrew (yep, my last
rescue was a shrew, I named him Percy) and looking more like
a sasquatch, than Venus.
I work too much sometimes. I can write for ten hours or more.
It isnt good for me or my family, and I have to use discipline
to stop. Im a very friendly loner and an introvert. I love people
intensely, but if theres a crowd, chances are I wont be in
it. I speak publicly, not because I like to, but because I feel
compelled to. My burning desire is to materially improve the
lives of as many people as I possibly can in one lifetime. Its my
way of transmuting my losses into wins; I call it the alchemy
of pain.

About Cynthia 39

I have a man who loves me the way every woman deserves

to be loved. My children are the light of my life. I am fiercely
independent and very attached to my mother. Ive had the
same best friend since I was twelve. Id lay my life down for
any one of them.
I am the most powerful person in my life and most days I wake
up surrounded by beauty and filled with passion and love. It
was not always this way. I am finally free, at home in my skin,
and happier than ever before.
I am always growing and changing, but my promise to you
is this: Ive built my life by applying the ways of being and
strategies contained in this book.
They work. Take them and make them yours.
With love,
Cynthia