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All email newsletters sent from brent@absolutepowerdating.com during 2011. I heavily recommend to subscribe to this newsletter to continue getting awesome inspiration and getting to the next level by sending an email to brent@absolutepowerdating.com
Table of Contents
How To Move Beyond Needing Attention (2011-12-17) ........................................................................ 3 Allow Yourself To Be Bored (2011-12-10) ............................................................................................... 4 How To Build Confidence (2011-12-03) .................................................................................................. 5 How To Get Women To Go ANYWHERE With You (2011-11-26) ............................................................ 6 How To Stop Procrastinating And TAKE ACTION (2011-11-12) ............................................................... 7 How To Have The PERFECT Woman (2011-11-05) ................................................................................ 10 How To Outrun Your Issues (2011-10-29) ............................................................................................. 12 Why Going Out When You're Tired Is HOT (2011-10-22)...................................................................... 13 How To Give Up WANTING And Start HAVING (2011-10-15) ............................................................... 15 How To Get A Promotion At Work (2011-10-08) .................................................................................. 17 How To Manifest Anything FASTER (2011-10-01) ................................................................................. 18 How To Overcome Failures (2011-09-24) ............................................................................................. 19 Never Say 'Never'! (2011-09-17) ........................................................................................................... 20 Changing Your Autopilot (2011-09-10) ................................................................................................. 21 How To Re-Frame Your Story (2011-09-03) .......................................................................................... 22 How To Stop Thinking (2011-08-27)...................................................................................................... 24 How Belonging To A Group Helps You Succeed With Women (2011-08-20) ....................................... 25 What Are You Getting Used To? (2011-08-13)...................................................................................... 26 The Only Person You NeedTo Impress Is YOU (2011-08-06)................................................................. 28 Why Building Up Your Wingman Attracts Women (2011-07-30) ......................................................... 29 How To Break Your Losing Streak (2011-07-23).................................................................................... 30 How To Stop Being Indecisive (2011-07-16) ......................................................................................... 31 How To Stop Being Judged (2011-07-09) .............................................................................................. 32 How Exercise Helps Your Brain (2011-07-02)........................................................................................ 33 How To Change Your View Of Yourself (2011-06-25) ........................................................................... 34 How To Talk About Your Success (2011-06-18) .................................................................................... 35 Why Listening Builds Attraction (2011-06-11) ...................................................................................... 36 How To ALWAYS Get Great Service (2011-06-04) ................................................................................. 37 How To Overcome The Urge To Pursue (2011-05-28) .......................................................................... 39 How To Speak To Foreign Women (2011-05-21) .................................................................................. 41 How To Use ANY Success To Have Even MORE (2011-05-14) ............................................................... 42 How To Give Out Your Number Part 2 (2011-04-30) ............................................................................ 43 How To Stop Getting Screwed Over (2011-04-23) ................................................................................ 45 1|Page
Brent Smith email Newsletters 2011 brent@absolutepowerdating.com How To Have A Successful Serious Relationship (2011-04-16) ............................................................. 47 Why People Are The Same Everywhere You Go (2011-04-09) ............................................................. 48 Why You Keep Being "The Friend" (2011-04-02) .................................................................................. 49 Breaking News: You're A Natural! (2011-03-26) ................................................................................... 51 How To Deal With Bad Stuff That Happens To You (2011-03-19)......................................................... 52 How To Be The Best Lover She's Ever Had (2011-03-12) ...................................................................... 53 How To Make Decisions That Will Get You The MOST Women (2011-03-05) ...................................... 54 How To Have What You Want (2011-02-26) ......................................................................................... 55 How To Stop Dating And Start Getting Physical (2011-01-30) .............................................................. 57 You Have Permission To Be Successful With Women (2011-01-23) ..................................................... 59 Dealing With Flakiness (2011-01-16) .................................................................................................... 60 Are You Giving? (2011-01-09) ............................................................................................................... 62 Why Wanting Something From Women Doesn't Work (2011-01-02) .................................................. 64
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Brent Smith email Newsletters 2011 brent@absolutepowerdating.com The most common reaction to confronting decisions or facing new situations is to delay or procrastinate. Sometimes it's the search for the right or best time. Other times it's because you're afraid of failing. Whatever the reason, hesitation almost always leads to unhappiness. By delaying an action, you only delay happiness and freeze fear in place. Waiting for the best time means waiting forever, since you can't know that moment until it has passed. Procrastination increases rather than reduces fears. Most often, though, the delay prolongs pain, anxiety, or discomfort. Hesitation will never improve your situation. Most often it makes things worse. So what's another reason you do it? Simple... FEAR. There are times you hesitate taking action because you're afraid of failure. Other times you hesitate because you're not sure what will happen and you're afraid of the unknown. You're probably an expert at coming up with reasons to NOT do something. You're not alone in rationalizing hesitation. We all do it. Most often you rationalize your hesitancy by blaming timing. You might say, "The times' not right." It could be that you think there's one perfect moment to take the action. A slight variation of this "time's not right" excuse is the "I'm not ready yet" justification. That was my favorite. I'm always preparing and then preparing some more, and spending another weekend preparing, all to keep from facing a difficult task. Obsessive over-preparation is my form of procrastination. I think it's better to seize a moment and act quickly than to procrastinate and lock fear in place. Besides, perfect timing is only apparent through hindsight. That's because time doesn't stand still and actions don't happen instantaneously. The judgment of what is the perfect time for any action is knowable only after it has already passed. The only way to stop feeling fearful is to take the action you're avoiding. Stop waiting for the perfect time; it will never come. Instead, realize that today is the best time to do anything. This is the moment. There's no time like now, so take the action. Whether it's going out alone, walking over and talking to a group of strangers or taking that seminar you've been putting off. It may not always turn out positively, but at least you will put the fear behind you and be able to move on. There's a story in the Talmud about a wise man walking in the countryside all by himself. He rounds a bend in the trail and comes upon a pack of wild dogs. Since he's afraid of dogs...he immediately sits down among them. One of the hidden points in that parable is that the wise man "immediately" sits down among the dogs. He doesn't waste time worrying about what might happen or how things could turn out. He realizes every moment spent hesitating is another moment living in fear. He doesn't wait for the dogs to lie down to sleep, or to become distracted by a rabbit, or to start playing with one another. He realizes there's no perfect time to take the action. He knows the best time to take the action is now. 8|Page
Brent Smith email Newsletters 2011 brent@absolutepowerdating.com Fear is the reason we delay taking action. We're afraid we're going to fail, or we're afraid of the unknown. The irony is that by delaying, we freeze the fear in place. And permanent fear leads to a kind of chronic emotional, psychological, and spiritual pain. You all have something you've been putting off and there's no time like the present for getting it done. Take the action. You'll achieve more, be happier and spend less time worried and afraid. Try it and let us know what happens!
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Brent Smith email Newsletters 2011 brent@absolutepowerdating.com You may have already found her. You might want to give the women who you're currently seeing more of a chance. By counting them out, for one reason or another you might be overlooking and missing out on a great relationship. Purging. If you really don't like the women you're currently seeing, stop seeing them and make room for the ones you really want. You must create physical and mental space for new things to enter your life. Giving up wanting perfection By letting go of wanting to have the perfect woman in your life, and knowing that you won't be less of a man if you don't have her will actually allow you to attract a great, near-perfect woman into your life. And, furthermore, she will drop into your lap without much effort on your part. Remember, It's the imperfect things about each one of us that makes us unique and it's those very things that can become our most endearing qualities. Ultimately, the perfect woman is the one whose imperfections you can live with and more importantly the woman who can live with YOURS! Try it and let us know what happens!
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Brent Smith email Newsletters 2011 brent@absolutepowerdating.com I said, "I'm beat and I think I'm done with this place." She said, "Let's get out of here and go to my place." I'm not relating this story in order to brag. I'm telling you because I want you to know what's possible when you stop caring about it and lead a non-stressful life. It seems like no matter who I'm being the results are the same. Truth be told, both versions of me are real. Neither mindset is being used as a technique. Will the above happen to YOU? Maybe. Once you're comfortable being the Mayor you can be anyone you want. Either way, this is an opportunity for you to be real. Being real is something a lot of you are having trouble with. Being tired forces you to be real; so don't fight it. Welcome it and don't try to over compensate for it. Bonus When you've decided to stay home and receive a text from a woman who wants to meet up with you (at a public place) the same night she texts you: You can simply text, "I'm beat and staying in tonight. Probably going to have a glass of champagne and relax." This will be real and she'll feel your energy; and probably end up at your place within 30 minutes. Try it and let us know what happens!
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Brent Smith email Newsletters 2011 brent@absolutepowerdating.com You have everything in you right now to be happy and fulfilled...when you finally understand this, you'll have everything you want...effortlessly. Try it and let us know what happens!
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Brent Smith email Newsletters 2011 brent@absolutepowerdating.com one where you aren't the victim, and there are no excuses. In this story, you are the hero, and you're entirely responsible for your past, present and future. Here's an example: Negative Personal Story "I lost my legs and right eye in a motorcycle accident and I'm in a great deal of pain, and my mom hates me, and I never knew my dad, and my sister is my mom's favorite, and they leave me here all by myself in the hospital and I'm miserable, and my girlfriend left me, and..." Positive Personal Story "I lost my legs and right eye in a motorcycle accident and I'm in a great deal of pain. My body has amazing healing abilities and I know I'll overcome the pain and go on to become the most talented one-eyed porn star in adult movie history! And who knows, maybe I'll meet a woman who likes me for ME and my true talents and not the size of my feet!" Sound too simple? I understand that it's not always that easy to find the courage to let go of the past and rewrite your personal story, but with practice, it becomes easier and easier. Over time, as you become more conscious of the negative self-talk, let go of your lame excuses, and choose a more positive outlook, you'll wonder what all the fuss is about. Try it and let us know what happens!
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Brent Smith email Newsletters 2011 brent@absolutepowerdating.com What should you do? *Realize that feelings aren't facts...they're just feelings. *Let the bad feelings go *Change the reason you go out. Go out to have a great time and meet a lot of people. Not to get dates, get phone numbers, get laid or get relationships (no pursuing) *As an exercise, compose the e-mail again. But this time write exactly how you'd like your life to be, allowing everything to be positive. *Use the improved e-mail as your new visualization. Go over it as often as possible until you convince your self of your new reality. By changing the way you look at everything, everything you look at will start changing. So start getting used to THAT. Try it and let us know what happens!
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Brent Smith email Newsletters 2011 brent@absolutepowerdating.com * When you get on the plane say, "Hey, how's it going?" to the flight crew. They might have a coronary so be careful. I've sat in first class so many times it's not even funny. I could go on and on but you get the idea. When you treat people well, they're surprised and you're viewed as someone who's confident, unique and understands their issues. Remember, they're trying to make a living just like you. Oh, one more thing. When you're leaving say, "See you next time."
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Brent Smith email Newsletters 2011 brent@absolutepowerdating.com * Refuse to be intimidated Temptation is a sign that your ego is fighting for survival. You can't keep your ego from suggesting thoughts, but you can choose not to dwell or act on them. Your ego will do anything to save itself. * Recognize your pattern of temptation There are going to be certain situations where you're more vulnerable than others. It may be when you're tired, lonely, bored, depressed or under stress. It may be when you've been hurt or angry or worried, or even after a big success. Identify your particular pattern of temptation and prepare for these situations. * Request help You need support in times of temptation; so reach out to friends or someone like me. * Refocus your attention Temptation begins by capturing your attention. What gets your attention arouses your emotions. Then your emotions activate your behavior, and you act on what you felt. Since it always begins with a thought, the quickest way to neutralize its allure is to turn your attention to something else. Don't fight the thought, just change the channel of your mind and get interested in another idea. * Reveal your struggle to others Join a support group or form your own. * Believe... and resist your ego Accept what I tell you as the truth. If you're a believer, your ego can't force you to do anything. It can only suggest. Don't argue with it. Don't say, "I'm not going to reach out." Instead say, "I'm on the right path." You can't bluff your ego with logic or your opinion either, but you can use the one weapon that it fears most-the truth! You already have enough power within you to defeat any temptation that comes your way. Temptation doesn't exist outside of you. The truth is that it always begins within you. The battle is won or lost in your mind. Try it and let us know what happens!
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If you've recently had something incredible happen to you, whether it was social or something spectacular in another area of your life, the challenge is getting it to happen over and over again and then taking it to the next level. First, forget about getting it to happen and focus on allowing it to happen. How you think about it while it's happening and directly afterward is the key. While it's happening, think to yourself, * I deserve this * This happens every time * This is something I am, not something I do * I'm happy to have such a positive affect on people * I'm spreading the good energy (I get back what I give out) * ETC. After it happens, it's important to use this positive experience to propel yourself forward. You've got to strike while the iron is hot, so to speak. How? Use it as your new visualization. Close your eyes and go over the recent event in detail. Make sure you include every reaction, smell, sound, look and feeling. Your mind doesn't know the difference between you visualizing it and it actually happening for real. And, since you need to convince your mind that this new behavior is now your life; the more you do it the more it will be. But, don't stop there. Add some additional things that you would like to have happen next time. You're allowed to tweak it. Remember, everything you visualize will come true. Try it and let us know what happens!
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I'm always telling you to lead your conversations towards the subject of 'Social Life' and to give out your number in that context as well (by not drawing attention to it). The two questions I get a lot are, 1)"How do I bring it up?" 2)"What if it's daytime?" 3)"What if I don't have a great social life or none at all?" Simple. After asking the usual questions (day or night) simply say, How's your social life? After she tells you about hers (good or bad) she'll ask you the same question. This is where you guys get scared. You're thinking: "I don't have Brent's extraordinary social life so this isn't going to work". What should you be? Be honest and tell her how you need one because you work too much, are just out of a long-term relationship or have never been that social; but are committed to changing that fact. Being honest doesn't make you look bad. It makes you REAL. So, talk about the social life you want to have and invite her to join you in your quest. She may also ask you to join her. This is where her maternal (I want to fix, help or nurture you) instinct comes in. So if she says, "It's great." And then goes on to tell you about it you could say, "Wow, that sounds cool. If I give you my number, would you reach out and let me know about stuff from time to time?" She might also say, "It could be better." Then you could say, "Mine too, but I'm working on it. Feel free to reach out if you want to know what I've found." If you ALREADY have a great social life then it's as simple as saying,
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Brent Smith email Newsletters 2011 brent@absolutepowerdating.com "I always know about cool things. Reach out if you ever want to know what's going on and I'll send you in the right direction". Then, shut up. She will probably reach for her phone and take your number. If she says, "Take MY number." Don't debate. Get your phone out and say, "Ok, what is it?" After you've entered it, text her right away, "Hey Susan, It's Craig. Nice meeting you. Keep me posted." That's it. Try it and let us know what happens!
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Brent Smith email Newsletters 2011 brent@absolutepowerdating.com I know that people make promises that they ultimately can't deliver but don't go into every situation expecting that to happen or you'll never have any personal growth. You'll have to trust someone eventually...and ultimately; you'll have to trust yourself. Try it and let us know what happens!
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Brent Smith email Newsletters 2011 brent@absolutepowerdating.com saying so I can keep asking them questions. That way I stay away from talking about me. That's a major turn-off with both men and women. I have women telling me some deep stuff. Stuff they would only tell their best friends and emotional counselors and I listen to it and I do care because I'm learning what they want and how they feel. I tell guys to treat women like they're your best friends! Joke around with them and don't take anything personal. Hang on loosely but don't suffocate them. Show interest and then come back later but don't put weight on the outcome because there are too many variables outside of your control. Have fun and move on. Most of all, confidence is the key and that only comes with experience. Everything really changed for me when I stopped worrying about the outcome. Thanks again for showing me the way! Jon Try it and let me know what happens!
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How To Make Decisions That Will Get You The MOST Women (201103-05)
Hey, Whether it's something small like what shirt to buy or something big like what job to accept or whether or not to buy an expensive car, does your internal dialogue sound something like this? 'Hmm, okay, which one will get me more women?' If it does, then you're going down a very dangerous road. Even if you have some success with this approach, you'll be a slave to it for the rest of your life. You're coming from a place of scarcity and your life is revolving around it. If you keep doing what you're doing you'll keep getting what you're getting...which is probably inconsistent success with women...at best! Here's how I make my decisions: When I'm looking at new clothes, my decision to buy a particular item is NOT based on how much MORE I will get laid or how women might DIG it or how it might make a great conversation starter. I make the decision based on whether I LIKE it...period. When I'm looking at a new car (let's say a Ferrari), my decision to buy is NOT based on whether women will think I'm doing well financially and want to sleep with me. I make the decision based on whether I LIKE it. When I'm at a club, my decision to buy bottle service is NOT based on how many girls I can lure over with free drinks, get drunk and trick into getting physical with me. I make the decision based on having a place to hang out and having drinks at my fingertips. I think you get the idea. Am I saying that you should wear a Members Only jacket and drive a Ford Gremlin? No. Although...there are those of us who even make THAT work. What I'm saying is that short of taking a shower, using deodorant and mouthwash, no decision you make should be based on whether the correct one will get women to like you MORE. If all this hasn't deterred you, then just remember that if you end up as one of those guys who pays for the company of HOT women with drinks, expensive dinners, gifts, cars and apartments; your night probably ends with a kiss and 'I'm kind of tired' and then she promptly drives your car over to my place, along with a very expensive bottle of champagne and some new clothes she bought me with your money! And, of course, does things with me that you don't even know are possible. Try it and let me know what happens!
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Brent Smith email Newsletters 2011 brent@absolutepowerdating.com 'This won't work...it can't be this simple. Maybe it works for Brent, but I don't look like Brent.' ETC. You're actually RESISTING and moving even further from HAVING. Dis-belief and resisting are ok feelings to have...just give those up as well. Now you have no more excuses and can put your energy into HAVING! Try it and let me know what happens!
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Brent Smith email Newsletters 2011 brent@absolutepowerdating.com line: change of plan; E-mail body: 'Friday night. Drinks my place. 8:00.'). Anyway, check out her response: whoa, that's forward of you. Ok, I understand. Do u want me to bring anything? :) haha! I'll let you know how it goes! John P, NYC Update! Hey Brent, It was great - not only did she come to my place for our 4th date, but she stayed over! Unbelievable! You're the fucking man! You can be the F-ing man too. Try this and let us know what happens!
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Brent Smith email Newsletters 2011 brent@absolutepowerdating.com Indifferent. By not caring and not pursuing you might actually draw her to you. But remember, if you had been the right kind of person in the first place...flaking would be a rare occurrence. Try it and let me know what happens!
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Brent Smith email Newsletters 2011 brent@absolutepowerdating.com You're out there spreading the good energy and the impact is that you often cause people in bad moods (being negative) to be in good moods (being positive) and more importantly they then spread that energy to the next person they interact with and so on and so on; they're actually paying it forward. I bet you didn't realize that you're having a much bigger impact than you think. Now, imagine if everyone did that. I want you to think about that for a moment. It's a huge revelation. Everything we complain about socially can be overcome, in some aspect, by giving. So the next time you're feeling nervous about approaching, just remember that the secret to living is giving. Try it and let me know what happens!
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