Running head: NARRATIVE REFLECTION

Narrative Reflection John Pearson Loyola University Chicago School of Education

NARRATIVE REFLECTION Never having been educated at a Jesuit institution, one of the components I was looking forward to the most was being able to reflect on my identities and my actions. This has allowed me to not only place what I am doing in the proper context but to also take a step back from the daily stresses of being a graduate student and a paraprofessional. In this narrative reflection, I highlight the most important content I learned from the program. I then look closely at the most important things I have learned about myself and how I have changed since entering the program. Following that, I discuss the most important things I have learned in my Graduate Assistantship. Finally, I close with the most important thing I have learned about social justice and how it will inform my future work in education. The Most Important Content I have learned from the Program As difficult as it is for me to point to the most important content I have learned from the program, I keep coming back to two ideas: discerning my leadership style and the assessment component in higher education. I was extremely interested in taking the Leadership in Higher Education class for one reason in particular: I really looked forward to learning from professor John Dugan. And while he did not disappoint, I learned more about myself and how I lead than other specific theory. I learned that I am a leader who most closely aligns with the ideas of servant leadership. At the same time, I am also a leader who feels comfortable in taking action when the situation calls for it. One of the key components of servant leadership is putting students or the other first and I absolutely fall into this category. I entered higher education to impact students on a personal, foundational level, this philosophy continues to today. I am here

first and foremost to promote, challenge and support each student that I work with. But, when the situation calls for it, I am not afraid to take action and be an advocate for student learning and development. Through the specific teachings of servant leadership I was able to situate my

NARRATIVE REFLECTION leadership style and name it. This has allowed me to continue to develop and sharpen my skills

as I become a professional in higher education. Learning the components of servant leadership is the first piece of important content; the second is the importance of evaluation in higher education. Being a political science major in my undergraduate experience, I was particularly interested in assessment and how it can signify what an office or organization is doing. Higher education can be very difficult to quantify and it is sometimes tough to name what we do. But through two classes, evaluation and curriculum I have learned how to qualify and put into terms what we do. In evaluation, we proposed a plan on how to assess a particular program. Our assessment would demonstrate the impact on the Loyola4Chicago on the student leaders. Being able to first conceptualize the outcomes and then find ways to measure it was extremely enlightening because it gave us first had experience with evaluation. In curriculum not only did we learn what it takes to create a successful class we also learned how to promote student learning. Through quantitative and qualitative data analysis we were able to continue to build the assessment foundation to be utilized in the future. Being able to name what we do will continue to be vital as money continues to be short and budgets continue to shrink. Not only have I learned important content, I have learned a lot about myself. The Most Important things I learned about myself and how I have changed One of the things that were really pushed in my time as a Loyola University Chicago student was the learning that occurs outside the classroom thereby caring for the whole person. I have learned that I am person who thrives on constructive feedback and a person who looks for and attempts to fulfill exceedingly high expectations. While this was initially quite overwhelming, I was able to build my confidence through a good grade here and there and rely

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on the work that I had done previously to guide my future work. Similarly, as I mentioned in my introduction to my ePortfolio, I am especially drawn to being challenged both professional and personally. It is where I feel I grow the most. I consciously chose to come to Loyola because it was so different from my undergraduate experience. It is private, urban and mission driven, three characteristics I had never experienced in my academic career. This has taught me that I should look for and be comfortable with trying something I have never done. I have had never been educated at a private, religiously affiliate institution and was nervous in the beginning, but now I am proud to call Loyola University Chicago my second home. I think back to one particular moment when I embraced being challenged, setting the tone for my career at Loyola. It was in my social justice in higher education course. In discussing the power, privilege, and oppression in our society, I had my very privileged identities pushed and challenged, making me feel uncomfortable. Because many of my identities are privileged, I had never felt this way. While I did struggle at times, I feel now I am ready to have a conversation and take action to change the minds of those who may be similar to me, allowing the conversation and struggle for social justice to continue. This sharp eye for social justice spilled over to my Graduate Assistant experience. The Office of First-Year Experience At my Graduate Assistantship at the Office of First-Year Experience at Loyola University Chicago, the most important thing that I have learned is to be confident, flexible, and always ready to act. Being confident, for me comes from experiencing things from being able to try something and then get better at it. But this cannot always be the case, especially in orientation. Because of this I learned to be confident in the things that brought me to the position I am in today. I have worked extremely hard and I must be able to look to my experiences and know that

NARRATIVE REFLECTION if I was able to get through those hard times, I can be confident as I move forward into the professional world. Next and tied directly to being confident is being flexible. Being confident allows me to be relaxed, increasing my ability to be flexible. But again, this may not always be the case. At times, it is extremely important to be ready for change and in fact embrace the unknown rather than being afraid of it. I think many times, especially in my first year as a Graduate Assistant, I was unsure of myself, making me very rigid. But as time went on, I learned to embrace the ambiguity of not knowing. And although this is scary sometimes, use this experience as a learning experience to see what will happen next. Third, always be ready to go ties back to the first two. As a graduate assistant at orientation we were seemingly always on stage. While nerve wracking at times, it taught me to always be on my toes wanting to act next. I learned that taking action and giving something a shot is a key to success. Although it may not work out all the time, being able to take advantage of an opportunity can be vital in my individual growth. I must be ready to pounce on an opportunity and just see what happens. All of this comes together, and when combined with social justice, has taught me more than I could have ever imagined. Social Justice Being a person with many privileged identities I learned that social justice is not just in the things we say and do, rather it is in the perpetual fight along with the daily thoughts and conversations we have. I recently attended NASPA and spoke up in one of the sessions as we discussed key themes in student development theory. After the session, I was approached by a fellow staff member at Loyola and he thanked me for speaking up, because the person that he was seated next to had very similar identities to me and the Loyola staff member could see that

NARRATIVE REFLECTION the person was nervous and uncomfortable. By speaking up, the staff member saw that as a person with privilege is willing to speak up, continuing the absolutely necessary call for action from everyone in the fight for social justice. I remember reading in one article that social justice is a perpetual fight, one that will never end. This quote will forever stay in my head as I work with students, that the work is never done and I must never, ever get comfortable with my position, rather I must push myself to not only enlighten those around me but also challenge and take action with those who continue to oppress others, even though they may not realize it. Knowing and embracing the fact that the fight for social justice will never end and that it is a daily grind is the most important thing that I have learned as it relates to social justice.