Summary Session 1 Stop and Feel

Lead from Insight Miranda van Schadewijk

Below you will find a summary of the things we have learned during this first session Stop and Feel of the Lead from Insight workshop held on Sunday the 23rd of March 2014 in collaboration with VPV in Hanoi. During this workshop we will learn by doing, learn from our own experience. I am not giving so much input into what is 'right' and 'wrong', 'good' or 'bad'. Because there is no right or wrong when we are learning about ourselves and from our personal experiences. The most important thing to learn is to have the confidence and tools to have a state of mind in which you can continuously learn from your own experiences and know how to investigate inside yourself. Trusting in your own intuitions and inner voice. As a leader, in our own lives, in our studies, at our work, this is a crucial skill.

Head-Heart-Body check
What: Say in 1 word how your head feels, your heart feels and your body feels. Example: My head feels busy, my heart feels happy and my body feels restless. Why: Being aware of what is going on in your head, your heart and your body is the basis for selfknowledge which is the basis for self-management, motivation and leadership. Reflection: For many of us, our head feels different from our heart which in turn feels different from our body. What does this mean? (We can have different feelings at the same time. This influences our decisions making and the way we experience different events. When we make a decision, which part of us is most dominant?)

Setting an intention
What: Think of why you are taking part in this workshop, what do you want to learn, how do you want to be during the workshop; What is your intention? Write it down on a sticky note, share it with the group and put it at the roots of the tree. These are seeds you want to water during the workshop. Why: When we know why we are doing something or what we want to learn, we will pay attention to this question more and probably learn more. The material and exercises can be put in the context of our personal questions/intention and make sense to us. This also helps with remembering things. For example, when we read a history book just like that, we will probably forget a lot. But when we know we want to learn a particular thing: what was the influence of Greek culture in Europe? Than we will read the book with this question in the back of our heads. All the information related to this question will stick to our mind and we can take notes

about it. It is the same for workshops we follow, classes we follow, work we do. Our intention makes an activity meaningful to us.

Body Awareness
Leadership starts with you. Therefore this workshop is called Lead from Insight. Leadership from your own inner wisdom. We need to know what our core values are, what is important to us to know which direction we want to take in life. We also need to know how we can manage our emotions. How can we lead our daily lives, having a choice to act instead of automatically react? To learn to manage our emotions, we start with learning to know ourselves. Learning to know how we can recognize emotions and thoughts in ourselves. Then, we can continue with learning how to manage emotions and thoughts. Knowing ourselves, means knowing how to do research inside ourselves. We can never know ourselves for a 100%, we can never predict all our emotional reactions to unknown events in the future. But we can learn how we can recognize them and investigate into them. The easiest and most effective way to start knowing ourselves is body awareness. Coming back to our bodies and our breathing. During the workshop we listened to the sound of the bell. When we hear the bell, we follow our breathing, feel how the belly rises when we breathe in, and falls when we breathe out. Doing this regularly is training us with focus and body awareness, creating a new habit. We did different exercises connecting body movements to our breathing. For example walking, one step one in breath, one step one out breathe. Dr. Tho Ha Vinh, Happiness Expert, Gross National Happiness center Bhutan, talks about awareness: Advertising and marketing is spending over 600 billion a year to catch our awareness. That is what marketing is about, catching our awareness. So I think a different society depends on our ability to reclaim our power of awareness and redirect our awareness intentionally according to values we want to put forward. (See the full interview here: Happiness )

Mindfulness
Mindfulness means: Body and mind together. We are not regretting the past or planning the future. Our mind pays attention to what our body is doing. Knowing what is happening right now. We observe ourselves. Role of observer. We observe what we are doing, what we are feeling, what we are thinking, what we are saying. Its always mindfulness of something. Mindfulness of breathing, mindfulness of walking, mindfulness of anger, mindfulness of happiness, mindfulness of eating. You can train mindfulness, like you can train to get better at badminton or violin playing. We need to learn this, it takes time.

Jon Kabatt-Zinn, University of Massachusetts, Medical center, founder of Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction programs (MBSR). Mindfulness expert. (See his full explanation here: Mindfulness ) His definition of mindfulness:

Paying attention in a particular way, on purpose, in the present moment, and nonjudgmentally. (Paying attention because we want it, right now, without judging or saying this is right, this is wrong) He also says: The present moment is the only time we have to create, to be in relationship, to love, to do anything. Because we only live in the present moment, we only live now. Nothing happens in the past or the future, those are only our thoughts.

Research
Who: Eileen Luders, University of California Los Angelos, Department of Neurology (science of the brain). What: She compared the brains of 22 meditators and 22 non meditators. Brain facts: - Everything we do and every experience we have actually changes the brain. This is called neuroplasticity. - More grey matter = more efficient and powerful area of the brain. Results of the research: Meditators had more grey matter in regions of the brain important for: - Attention (increased control of attention) - Emotional regulation (better at managing emotions) - Mental flexibility (better at making mindful choices Three very good reasons to practice mindfulness! And there are many more: Clear mind EQ acting versus reacting focus and concentration Improved memory Decisiveness Relaxation of body and mind increased immune function better overall quality of life emotional regulation It's free! Increased productivity No side effects

Deep Listening
Deep listening is listening with our full attention (with mindfulness). This is a very important soft skill that will help us improve our general communication skills because we will understand the other person better, we will understand what the main points are, we will have empathy for the other person which leads to that other person liking us more, helps in conflict resolution, will help us get to know the other and ourselves better.

How: Follow your breathing. Try not to judge. Listen to hear, not to speak. (Dont try to think of the right response) Dont interrupt Observe your emotions and thoughts and put them aside for now. Silence is ok!

Journaling
Writing a journal is a way of practicing self-discovery. Mindfulness of thoughts and emotions by writing them down. Research: What: 49 students had to journal for 2 minutes, for 2 days, about something emotionally significant. Results: They had better moods and better results at psychological well-being tests. Results when journaling is done for more days: Feeling better Healthier blood work (body) Higher grades in school. Exercise: Write for 5 minutes, non-stop. Start with the sentence What I am feeling now is