Cruz 1

Brittany Cruz
Jodie Jones
COMM 1080
7 March 2014
Response Paper 2
A conflict that I had recently with my sister, Monique was regarding our different beliefs
toward organized religion (1). Monique, being lesbian has trouble accepting the lifestyle because
she feels as though they do not accept hers. Since I converted to the LDS religion 7 months ago
my family often feels like I push them away. My sister feels that because my church does not
stand for gay marriages I must not also. Unlike her, I do not see it as being black and white.
Growing up our family was not religious and to be religious was said to be a sign of weakness.
My father would say to us, religion is an excuse to give people happiness and to feel better
about their mistakes.
Although, the conflict only lasted a few hours, it was a loaded emotional conversation for
me to have with my sister (2). The problem ended with both of us having an understanding
where each other stood. She realized that my thoughts of things/life had changed and where
different from what we were taught as children. I understood that she would remain resistant
toward my lifestyle and is happy with hers. Ultimately, we both have extremely different views;
hers being scientific and mine being spiritual we agreed to disagree. My goal during the
confrontation was for her not to see things in black and white (3). It appeared that she wanted it
Cruz 2

to be her way or no way; and when I tried to explain my side it seemed to be tossed aside,
because I had no scientific evidence.
Our conversations as children are what lead us to this conversation now. We were very
much alike with our views and even as adults. It wasnt until I moved to Utah last year that I
changed. Due to her and my family not seeing me for a year we lost touch. I stopped
communicating and Monique wasnt aware of the trials I was facing along with being here in
Utah without family or friends (4). During the conversation I convinced myself that my sister
was closed minded and judgmental (5). Monique was constantly complaining about her being a
victim. People judging her for being lesbian, yet she was judging me and other religious people
for our actions and our beliefs. This was frustrating for me, because I felt she was being two-
faced. Upset with her, I told myself I was spiritually more mature than her, and that it would
take time for her to understand. (6).
I vented to my boyfriend about this argument and recruited him to my point of view
toward my sister (7). Understanding now that by doing this I only helped ruined their new
relationship. Luckily, the issue was resolved N/A (8). Admitting my sister had valid points to
her arguments was something I had to acknowledge in order for us to resolve the issue (9). N/A
(10) N/A (11). There came a point during the confrontation that I felt she wanted me to say Yes,
Monique your right, our church with the help of the tithing that I paid was spent toward banning
gay marriages and I am sorry. This I would not do! I would not apologize or feel guilty for
having faith in my religion and my actions to support it (12). Our relationship has become
healthier because of these discussions and we both our accepting of one another (13).
Cruz 3

Something my aunt said to me after my mother passed away was to accept life and
people for what they are, and not for what you want them to be. I want my sister to be herself
and not to be what I would imagine her being. I love her and her thoughts because they bring
light into how I think (14). After my sister gets passed being defensive she is good at resolving
an issue and I appreciate her input. N/A (15) N/A (16) issue was resolved within hours N/A (17)
N/A (18)
The most difficult part of the assignment was finding an argument that I was passionate
about. I wanted to remember an argument that would most likely come up again in the future and
that I could learn from (18). The hardest thing for me to answer truthfully in the assignment was
recruiting someone to my opinions of my sister (20). It broke my heart to think that I went to my
boyfriend for comfort, but ended up molding his perception of her instead. Unfortunately, he
does not know her like I do and does not understand her views and how she developed them.