What to do with my life this question may be bothering a lot of people just coming out of

college or may be when they have to choose subjects in class X or may be when they have
to decide the college
But here I am already done college , doing job 25 yrs old now and nothing
!till searching for that something which will give me the satisfaction"" something which I loo#
forward to do every morning when I get up
I don$t #now"" I am not able to find it"" everyday I get up and thin# may be today I will find
what I am loo#ing for but nothing
%hey say that universe will give sign and you just have to pic# it up"" why the hell I am not
able to pic# that sign""
I #now that I am not alone in this dilemma"" and there must be lots of people going through
it daily btw I forgot to introduce myself I am !iddhi right"" not sufficient ""
&et me see where to start from"" I thin# born and brought up we can s#ip or else all the
pages will cover only my child hood yup been a naughty #id and did every possible pran# "
'nyways"" engineering graduate"" yeah another one"" engineering has become a fad"" and
boo#s by engineers another one I #now you must be thin#ing better put it down
now"same old bollywoodish story"" thrown with a mi( of college life with little bit masala
added
But seriously those boo#s have become li#e a religion everyone is writing "" everyone is
reading"" and all of them bestseller well I have even cursed myself for not e(ploring life
from that perspective or not paying proper attention to bollywood movies"" or I could have
written a boo#
'nyways no masala here plain boring life suc#ing monotony
!o I thought ta#e a brea# from a job and try everything"" right from selling stuff from home,
to writing articles for maga)ine"" authoring a boo# may be learning mystic sciences and
become a healer or sharpening my analytical s#ills and become a detective"" or may be a
magician who can da))le everyone or may be nothing just li#e jughead" !leep, eat and
sleep *
!o here I am doing all that and putting my e(periences in my diary"" which may come
handy later on for someone else who may find a vocation out of it
Well all the best if you are planning to read on my diary"" it may have its consequence""
may be you also decide to leave your job and become a detective

!o you still want to go through this"" alright come aboard and I will ta#e you with me to my
life$s journey"""
Characters
Siddhi
Ma
Dad
Ishika
Rohit
Chinmay Verma
Mrs Verma
Siddharth Kapur
Pooja
Chapter 1
Hit by the Iceberg
%his all started a year bac# "" +ortunately or unfortunately because of recession hitting us
li#e iceberg hit the %itanic"""
Well"" you #now manager calls you up""" tal#s about lots of stuff"" and then after sugar
coating the words tells you that you need to start loo#ing for other options"" to #eep it
simple"" lets say I was thrown out of office""" and was on streets thin#ing what to do ne(t""
'nd as was e(pected nothing came""" no lightning struc#"" no ideas came flashing""
I pic#ed up my bag and well wal#ed bac#"" , right""" see I have already started saving
money for bad days- to my so called home"" ,rented apt"" small one at that-
Was I living alone""" no absolutely not"" in this world of high inflation and low salaries"" living
alone is not an option"""
!o time to introduce you to my roommate Ishi#a""well"" lets s#ip the introduction for the
moment when she enters the scene"""
right now I am entering alone in an apt which loo#s li#e a furnace"" its on top floor and its
summer and its gurgaon why the hec# did I agree for a top floor"" well for one simple
reason"" that when you have job everything loo#s rosy"" and it was my very first job""
I am not sure what others would have done in such a scenario but I thin# the reactions
would have not been any different"" throwing the bag forcefully""" cursing everyone you #now
in office"" as#ing ./0 why me and not anybody else""" and well cry""" come on crying is a
girl$s birthright"" and well it ta#es the steam off"" so I cried and cried for almost li#e 2 hrs""
yeah that much""
%hen I thought to share this news with my parents"" yes so boring"" 'nyways I called my
mom and told about the whole thing"" and cried some more" he he
'nd as great parents are """ they never question you and have uttmost faith in you and your
potential""'ccording to them the whole world is against their children"" so comes a
whole 111 of not to worry lines"" everything will be alright lines"" and we are here for you
lines"" Well you got the gist"""
I felt much better about that call"""" at least it stopped the crying""
'nd then Ishi#a came""" my very room mate I tal#ed about earlier"" not let me introduce her
properly""" !he is around my age"" again an engineer"" sometimes I fell half of the people
who are graduating and doing job are engineers"" ,yeah I #now its not true""" but there are
too many of us these days""" gone are the charming days when parents introduced their
#ids with choda seena or uncha sar"" meet my son2 daughter"" pursuing engineering- well
well""
so Ishi#a is an engineer"" yup you guesses right "" !oftware engineer,!3- with a 456 firm""
nice pay pac#et"" wor#"" coffee brea#s""" full day '6"" gtal#"" gmail"" faceboo#"" and yes
wor#"""0ont get me wrong we do wor#"" its just that our wor#ing style has become very
advanced"" we multitas# very efficiently
'lright you need a little better description to visualise her"" now I can not give 0aniel !teele
#ind of description but let me try""she is about 5$57, slender, li#es to wear suits mostly , now
dont even thin# she is behen ji just by the fact that she li#es to wear suits"" I #now you
guys-" !he is witty, always ready with correct answers, and if there is ever any verbal fight ,
please girls dont get into that cat fight as shown in reality %8- she is the li#ely winner""
smart, methodical, practical, sensible, spontaneous but she is a little aloof" 'lright this is
what I can tell now but I am sure more of her character will come alive as we go through
the phases of my life part of which too# place in gurgaon""" oh"" 0id I not tell you we will be
going places""fantastic places"" but more on that later
!o, yes going bac# to where we left the scene Ishi#a entered the apartment ,we both have
separate #eys"" you never #now when the other is coming"" typical !3s-
3nough of my rumblings, time for some actual conversation between two human beings"
9:ey, Ishi#a7
9:ey !iddhi7
9:ow was your day7
9usual" 5othing out of ordinary" 0eadline of my current project is approaching, so couple of
wee#s ahead are pretty hectic" :ow about you17
9Well, I had a life altering e(perience today which will result into changing my official status
on faceboo# and twitter from employed to currently loo#ing for wor#" In short, I got sac#ed"7
9Why"" What happened17
9Well, in words of my manager"" the unit I was wor#ing in, was loosing money so needed
to shutdown" Its a strategic business decision" 'nd though he #now I am invaluable to
company, he still have to let me go"" blah blah blah7
90ont worry !iddhi, there are plenty of jobs around" I am sure it will not be tough for you to
get one"7
9;eahhhhhh"" lets see7
96ome on now"" how about some dinner7
95o yaar, don$t feel li#e" ;ou carry on, I$ll have something later7
Ishi came and sat beside me"
9're you feeling o# !iddhi7 ,5ow seriously this question is highly over rated" <eople as#
this question when they #now that other person is not o#" Why the hec# people as# such
questions as if as#ing it, may change the other$s mind and suddenly he will be alright" /r
better still, other person will say yeah, am fine just li#e that to let other person leave him
alone" 'nd he goes on happy in the fact that he made everything o#-
9;eah, I will be o# in sometime7, /f course I am not feelig o#-
9;eah, I understand" 5ow don$t be sad" 3verything will be alright" .od must have made
some better plans for you" 6ome, eat something7
Well, I didn$t need much convincing" I was hungry and no boss, I am not going to coo# food
, I am sure you must be thin#ing of us moving to the #itchen and preparing something-
I am e(pert at many things but at coo#ing, I suc#ed and I blame it on the fact that I was
busy studying so could not get time to indulge in these mundane activities li#e coo#ing"
Well, later on you will come to #now that I suc# at lots of things and no reason to justify that
too"" alas"
We get tiffin from tiffin center which claims it to be li#e your ghar #a #hana" %rue that it
contains our very own dal, rice, chapati and veggies" But thats where the similarity ends"
lets not even tal# about how it tastes or how are we able to eat it day after day and too
even when we have to pay for it"
'fter having a hearty meal ,pun intended-" We went to our rooms, switched on the laptops
and started browsing" %his is a ritual one has to do before sleeping, almost li#e a prayer"
5o matter how tired you are, or downright depressed or even when you are fired, you just
have to do it" !o, I logged in gmail, faceboo#, twitter, yahoo""" etc etc, chec#ed for
messages" 'nd then after much deliberation decided against updating my status or tweeting
about it" I guess I was not ready for more 9're you o#ies7
%hough I thought I may not be able to sleep, it was a very turbulent day for me but guess
what I have discovered another advantage of crying" ;ou become very tired after e(ercising
so many muscles of your face and body in the process of crying, that sleep comes easily"
'nd so I slept li#e a quietly sin#ing titanic in the ocean"
Chapter
!hat sinking "ee#ing a"ter being hit $ %othing to do
:ow quic#ly one moves from a normal healhty person to behaving li#e a 0evdas" %he job
which you hated till the day before yesterday, the job you cursed, which seemed to be full
of monotony, now becomes your beloved <aro and you li#e 0evdas could not stop thin#ing
about it for a second" Wishing every passing minute that it comes bac#"
Bro#ing my reverie is a call from my parents" %hey said that after lots of discussion they
decided that it will be good if I ta#e a brea# now, can come and stay with them for a few
days and then join bac# later" 'nd this is how it went"
9:ey !iddhi7
9:ey dad7
9:ad brea#fast7
95ot yet, didnt feel li#e having anything7
95o, thats not good" 't least have somthing7
90ont worry 0ad, I will have something" ;ou tell me how you and ma are doing7
9We are fine" I and your ma were discussing about you and thought you might not be in
your best spirits now" !o, why don$t you come over and stay for sometime with us" %his will
be a perfect opportunity for all of us to spend sometime together" ;ou also needed a long
deserved brea# and now you can ta#e one" &ater you can start applying and join bac# in
some company$
9But dad, I wanted to start for job hunting immediately ,now that$s not true, I haven$t even
remotely started thin#ing about it as of yet-7
9I understand beta ji, but ta#e some time off" 6ome home and then you can apply from
here as well"7
9;eahhh7
9=ight then its decided that you are coming" &et me #now when are you planning to come, I
can get the tic#ets arranged7 , !o he was not ready for me to bac# out of this plan-
9'lright, let me see7
9.reat, see you then7
I have not given any definite answer to them" But said I will seriously consider about it"
%hey didnt agree first but later on they have to give up as always in front of their #ids" But
they said they will call bac# again to #now my answer"
I cursed my manager, company and that damned job once again"""" which anyways I am
doing since the time I got up"
&oo#s li#e my stomach also joined in the protest as I could hear its grumbling sound" I
loo#ed at the cloc# and it was already afternoon, wasted so much time" :igh time I should
get up and at least settle one complain" I went to the #itchen to prepare 4aggi with a hot
cup of tea"" &ong live the people who invented 4aggi" What would the world would have
been without 4aggi, it has been the constant companion, saviour to all wal#s of people" It
ma#es everyone feel li#e a great coo#" It comes in handy whether its e(am time, or brea#
up time or ma#e up time or just friends sitting together gossiping or snac#s time"" 'nytime is
4aggi time"" 'nd no, 4aggi has not given me any commission to right about it in this
novel"" Its just that its has been with me for so long that I even can not contemplate my life
without it"
'fter my stomach is settled , than#s for it to raise the complain, as I can thin# more clearly
now-, I started thin#ing of what should I do" .o bac# to my parents or stay here"
Well, I did nothing" *ust do)ed off thin#ing about it and got up when Ishi#a entered home"
9:ey you sleeping beauty" .et up, its > in the evening" :ow come you are sleeping late1 I
can see that you had 4aggi for lunch" 5ow get up and get dressed, we will go out
somewhere for dinner" %his staying at home and sleeping will not do you any good" ;ou
need some fresh air"7
9'aahh"" is it already >" I have been sleeping for a long time" &oo#s li#e this thin#ing part
tires me" Why the hell they dont have one subject on increasing your thin#ing capacity or
ma#ing your brains wor# in adverse situation in engineering"7
9;ep, good idea"&ets suggest this in the ne(t 'lumni meet" =ight now just get up and get
going"7
9o# o#"" give me a few minuted" I will get ready" Btw whats the plan" Where are we heading
to7 I as#ed while selecting what to wear"
95o plan" 's today is official off for tiffin service, so thought why not go out and eat" 'nd
anyways, eating out is way better than coo#ing" 'nother reason being, you already had
4aggi one time as your meal" !o, thought will be little considerate on you"" lol7
9'lright7
Ishi#a is a dear friend, I #now that she is just trying to cheer me up" 5o matter how bad
your life become, friends are always there to help you out and ma#e you feel special" If
nothing else, they will help you fight out your loneliness by giving company , wanted or
unwanted-
'nyways, we headed out to this place called ?&ovely restaurant$ in sector@AB which is btw is
at wal#ing distance from our place, hence quite convenient" Its strategic pricing made it a
favorite amongst the youngsters who are staying alone because of their job" .ood tasty
food is an added bonus, please don$t go the name" !ometimes names can be also
deceptive li#e appereances
's it was only >CDE pm, so it was not much crowded and it was a relief to me today" I was
not in the mood for all that noise and hassle" We gave our order and were waiting for food
when Ishi#a initiated the conversation"
9&oo# at this place, so empty right now" In 2 hrs time, you wont be able to see your own
feet here" We should always come at this time only, no waiting time, fast service and best
of all a place to sit"7
9;eah7
9+inally saturday after a full long hectic wee#" :ow about a movie tomorrow"" what do you
thin#" in the new mall which has just opened last wee#" 3veryone was tal#ing about how big
and all it is"" so that ways we can watch the movie as well as see the mall""" and do some
great window shopping""7
9'lright7
%han#fully our order came" 'roma of the food uplifted my mood a little bit" I didnt have
decent
meal since yesterday and well I have a wea#ness for food apart from couple of others
which will soon be out in open"
Ishi#a seeing that I am busy eating, went quiet for a while which was welcome given the
food is damn delicious", 5ow I am not saying that this restaurant is commended by critics
for tingling their taste buds, but loo# at my point of view" <erson who is fond of food, and is
made to eat tiffin2office food daily, feels that well coo#ed and spiced meal is the best in this
world- 11
5ow now don$t start to create a s#etch of !iddhi in your head, slightly fat, overweight,
always thin#ing about food #ind of a girl "" just because I am a self@declared foodie" &et me
introduce myself a little bit more here though it will not matter in the long run" But you #now
girls are girls, no matter how bad a situation is they are always conscious about their
physical appearance and vibes they are sending out to other"" lol
/ne more thing you must have guesses about me that I move quite bac# and forth when I
am tal#ing, very fic#le indeed" I try to stay focus but it is very difficult and really is a big
headache for me" 'nyways we will come bac# to my habits2nature later" *ust let me you
help in creating a mental image of myself" If it would have been a romantic boo#,
description would have started something li#e this"
%he first thing you will notice about !iddhi, are her beautiful brown eyes which are always
bright li#e a small curious #id, slightly arched eyebrows, smiling mouth, slightly round nose"
!he has nice blac# straight hair but she always tie them in a ponytail but which once
opened loo#s li#e a thin# mass of blac# waves in ocean" !he is a petite woman who wears
enjoying jeans with different colored cotton shirts2#urtas"
'nd lets leave it at that because it loo#s li#e a fine description, why spoil it and ma#e it
ordinary for not@a@romantic@story"
o#"" getting bac# from where we started""" me and Ishi#a in ?&ovely restaurant$"" yeah we
drifted a lot from the original story"" but told you my nature"""
!o after I had something in my stomach ,who says only the way to man$s heart is
accessible through stomach-, I was in better spirits"" and I told Ishi#a about my day"
94y parents called up today" they want me to come home, ta#e some rest and they start
applying later"7
9:mm, 0id they say anything else also7
95o, nothing7
9'nd you dont have any in#ling of the fact why are they calling you home7
9What why"" they are worried for me"" thats why7
Ishi#a started smiling her naughty smile
9!iddhi, you are so naive" &et me elaborate it for you a little bit more" I thin# they are
thin#ing of finding a match for you"" hoorraayyy7
95o way7
9Well I have a very definite philosophy behind the whole scenario"7
9'nd will you please enlighten us mortal beings with your wonder #nowledge Ishi#a 4a7
9Why not / thou .od$s children"7
9're you going to tell or I will punch you in face7
9/# /#" !ee from parent$s perspective any time is a good time to start searching a suitable
groom for their daughter and to train her to become a good housewife" By training the girl I
mean, the stuff which we didnt do in home li#e helping in #itchen, tidying the house etc
claiming to be immersed in studies always" 's the daughter is staying with them its more
easier to meet prospective in@laws and finalise the things" 'lso in India, mostly its the girl
who has to shift her job to the city where his husband is wor#ing , trend is slightly changing
now but seriouly not much, still it is mostly male dominated-, so anyways girl has to find the
job then why not wait for sometime and find the job after marriage itself"7
9oh oh"" now I get it7
7/h /h you get it ""lol7
95ow, I really need to thin# and weigh my options7
Ishi#a smiled" 96ool """I would be glad to help you out in searching"" may be I will be able to
find someone for me as well7
9'nd what will happen to =ohit"" 9
9/h, he is there in waiting list na"" let me just have a loo# around" 4ay be I will find
someone better loo#ing with a better ban# balance7 she was all naughty while saying that"
It made me smile after full DE hours" Imagine only few hours changes everything in life and
yes, =ohit is Ishi#a$s boyfriend" :e will come in and go, now don$t loose patience, you will
get to meet him soon"
9.reat"" now no more discussion on marriage" &ets pay the bill and move out from here7
'fter coming bac#, Ishi#a went to her room and I came to my mine" %his new perspective
on my parent$s thin#ing left me more bewildered than before" %his perspective only
deepened my 0evdas li#e feeling" Why 11 's if you didn$t guess" 6ome on, I am only 25"" I
have so many things to see in life and to settle down nooowwww"" bad timing
I still remember when my jiju,brother@in@law- got a transfer and my sister has to resign from
the job" 4y parents and even my jiju$s parents thought that it was the perfect time for jiju
and didi to start a family" 'nd their arguments were soemthing li#e this"
9Beta ji, .od has plans for everyone and ta#e this as a positive sign from him" 5ow you
can start your family without having to deal out with the hassles of ta#ing leaves, managing
office wor# and #ids" ;ou can devote your time completely here and then once your #id is
old enough to be left at home or at creche, you can directly join bac#"7
:ow can you counter such arguments, in which even .od is involved"
I really admire parents for their optimistic approach" 5o matter how hard a situation is they
are always able to find something to cheer about" 'lso, I guess once we grow up they miss
us in their lives, so spending time with their grown up #ids or helping them find a right
partner or waiting for the new arrival in the family ma#e them feel involved in our lives" , I
#now its wrong on our parts to become so selfish and not give them enough time which I
am sure we are going to regret once we have our own children to set e(amples in front of
us-" 'nyways in this current scenario of my being unemployed have given them the perfect
opportunity to get me married"
!huc#sFFFFFFFFF
'nd I slept FFFFFF
"
Chapter &
Home ca##ing
!aturday morning came and so does a thought came in my mind" 5o matter what happens
morning and night will always follow their cycle of coming and going and then coming again"
I simply love this about nature, be it the seasons, or day2night or festivals"" they always
come again and again in your life giving you hope that all is not lost"
;ou must be thin#ing "" great .od"" philosophy that too in morning"" well I have learnt one
thing in my e(perience"" philosophy comes to me naturally when I am ?be#aar$""" right now
jobless" /r just say that my optimism , you will come to #now that this is one virtue I dont
possess in plenty and will be depleted soon- made me thin# about those beautiful thoughts"
I chec#ed the watch, its only G$E cloc#" ;eah, one should not say only"" but once you come
out of engineering college, join job"" sleeping till AE in the morning is another ritual which is
religiously followed by most of us at least" !o getting up at G on a saturday without any plan
or reason is something which calls for serious thin#ing about ?what the hell is wrong with
me$" But guys joblessness does that to you" 'nyways, time for tea and newspaper ,;es, I
do read newspaper" o# o#""" only the bollywood news"" great-" I passed sometime going
through each and every small gossip in supplementary and only headlines of the main
paper"I love gossiping li#e every other person on this planet"" I am girl and this is my
birthright"
I was through with newspaper and was waiting for Ishi#a to get up" 5ormally on wee#ends
when I am free I prefer watching television, but today somehow I dont feel li#e watching it"
'nd once again thin#ing wheels started rolling" !omeone very aptly said ? #hali dimaag
shaitan #a ghar hota hai$" 'nd this devil sitting in my head is ma#ing me thin# so much in
these past couple of hours which I have not done in so many years" H
'gain and again my mind #eep on going over the things Ishi#a said yesterday" %hought of
marriage has completely engulfed the main reason behind all this happenings in my life" In
one way, it was good only that I am not thin#ing about my job or no job" When only the
simple idea of marriage is giving me creeps, how will the actual thing will be I shudder to
thin#" I was actually considering going home after my parents called yesterday but now I am
having second thoughts about it"
+inally Ishi#a came out of her room, giving me a respite from the the ?shaitan$ sitting in my
head"
94orning Ishi7
94orning" .ot up early today 1 &oo#ing for suitable grooms in the newspaper, are we7
9!hut up" 5othing li#e that and matrimonials comes on sunday and not saturday"7
9'lready started gathering information on matrimonials7
98ery funny7
9!o whats the plan" &unch at home, then movie plus dinner out or lunch plus movie out,
dinner at home7
9I guess lets have quic# lunch at home, then lets go out"7 %hat ways I will have less time to
thin#" 4ay be later I will come with some better idea"
9'lright, its AECDE now" &ets target to leave at around ACDE then"7
We were able to leave at D only, and I say its reasonable as we are only little of our target
deadline ,now dont e(claim when I say little off target, everyone needs time and we even
had lunch-" 5ow you will wonder as to what is the need to set the target" %his helps us in
moving things a little faster as we #eep on chec#ing our watches"
Whole day went just li#e that" We watched a rom@com while munching popcorn, moved in
and out of every shop of the mall, chec#ed out all the stuff ,of course which is relevant to a
girl-, purchased nothing, had a nice dinner at the food court and came bac#"
%han#fully I become so dead tired while moving about, that after coming bac# went straight
to bed" 't least I am able to postpone that thin#ing part to tomorrow" I always believed and
still do that if an idea does not stri#e you on thin#ing about a problem in one shot, then you
should postpone it for ne(t day" but of course for applying it, you should be busy enough so
as not to thin# about the problem in first place" I always applied this theory in my personal
and professional life and was quite successful as others always thin# about the solution
beforehand"
But this time I was not so luc#y" %he problem was still waiting me for the ne(t day with no
solution in sight" /nly good thing was that I got up at AE$o cloc#"
6oming out of the room, I saw Ishi#a already having tea and well, reading the matrimonial
section of the newspaper" %his is one of our sunday %< options, loo#ing at all matrimonial
ads and ma#ing ma#ing fun of them" !eriously some of them are quite funny, sometimes its
better than reading jo#e boo#s"
9:ey you got up" =eading ads ma#e me feel that really all #inds of people are their in
soceity":ear this one out @
Widower, 55, retired, having 2 sons, e(pects beautiful, attractive, affectionate Widow with
5o 6hild, from same caste, good communication s#ill, age between D5@BE" <l) send ur
details blah blah
6an you imagine"""" himself being 55 years of age with two #ids and wanting women A5 yrs
younger and no child" 'nd hear this one"""""7
94orning Ishi, 6an we tal# about something else apart from matrimony ads"7
9/uch" !omeone is sure grumpy this morning" &oo#s li#e you were writing the boo# life
after marriage in your mind last night 7
94a#e fun of me"" let me see your face once your parents start thin#ing about your
marriage7 I said in sarcasm
9/uch again""" loo#s li#e you need a strong cup of tea to clear your head" &et me do the
honor of ma#ing cup of tea for you and then we will tal#7
9I dont #now what is there to tal# but cup of tea sounds great"7
9.reat7
;ou must be thin#ing so many of cups of tea in only few pages"""" right"" I #nowwwwww"""
but this is one habit which you get from wor#ing in I% companies" Inlimited supply of tea
and coffee"" means unlimited supply of coffee"" to #eep your brain active or rather to stop it
from sleeping"" and according to me a second reason is only an idiot will not ma#e use of
stuff which is available for free" , though it costs a lot in the long run but what the hec# right
now its free-
Ishi#a came bac# with tea and some biscuits" :er philosophy tea should never be ta#en
alone and I am fine with it because its adding something e(tra only to it"""" , told you I love
eating-
9!o now tell me what have you decided7
9'bout what7
9Whether you are planning to go home or start loo#ing for a job immediately"7
9I seriously dont #now" 3arlier I was thin#ing that going home would be good" I will get a
brea# and rest" I can start applying from there itself and then come down for interview if I
get a call"7
9:mm""" this is a good option" !o what is that stopping from you to do it7
9%he idea you have pushed into my head"" that my parents are thin#ing about me getting
married7
9!ee, this is what I thin# they want but I could be wrong" !econdly even if they are thin#ing
its not that you are getting married tomorrow or as soon as you reach your home" ;ou can
go and tal# to your parents about it" !itting here doing nothing will affect you @ mentally and
physically7
9;eah you are right" I thin# I will go home" I will call my dad and inform him that I am
coming"7
9.reat" 5ow stop being so sad" %hings always happen for good, you will see that
something good will come out of it"7
I smiled"
Chapter '
(t home
+inally I left gurgaon and reached #anpur, my hometown" *aipur is a very nice warm city,
warm as in people and also the weather" %here is something different about I<, I<
language and awesome I< food" I have been to many states but nothing beats the food
and the sweets of I<" 4y dad came to pic# me up at the railway station" ;eah, I #now I am
a big girl but dad li#es to come and pic# me up and I on my part always love the feeling of
seeing him at the platform and waving at him" Its a nice feeling, you feel you already
reached home once you saw your parents standing there to receive you" 'll the tiredness
and suffering of the journey vanishes in an instant when you shout from the window, hey
dad here 9
.reat, so reached home"""" aroma of home coo#ed food filled my nostrils as I stepped inside
my house #nowing that my mother will be coo#ing all my favorite food today" I thought I will
surprise her and quietly moved towards the #itchen, but before I could shout she turned and
saw me" ' huge smile on her face"
9!iddhi beta, you are home"" 9 she hugged me and then in another instant, her inspection
started"
9;ou have become so thin"" am sure you people dont eat properly"" and must not be
sleeping on time"" how about mil#"" and full day on laptop am sure"" you people dont listen
to anyone""7
Before she could add anything further, I interjected
96ome on 4a, this could carry on later also" =ight now absolutely famished" I will just go,
freshen up and come bac#7
9'lright alright, you go ahead" I will start ma#ing rotis7
'fter having a lavish meal , any meal at home feels lavish after eating tiffin and office food
for months or for that matter even wee#s-, sitting at home I felt rela(ed in days" 6oming to
home always is good and the state of mind in which I am in right now, it feels more
welcome this time"
I started flic#ing through the channels on television, in the meantime my mother came after
cleaning the #itchen"
9/h" Its already D pm" =epeat telecast of ?meri saas chudail meri bahu naagin$ must be
coming" !iddhi, can you please go to ?forever shows$" I missed yesterday$s episode7
9o#7
I watched it for half an hr and I was already in sync with everything" %his is the best part
about our shows, you can leave it at anytime and join bac# in anytime" ;ou will feel that
you have watched it all along" :ats off to the writers of such shows that even though story
never moves, they have the ability to inspire people to #eep on watching these shows for
years" 4y mother is such an ardent fan of this ?forever shows$" %his particular serial is
coming when I was in school, and though I was growing up ,completed 2 yrs in school,
moved to engineering college- these people were still at the same age" 'nd suddenly when
I came bac# from engineering college after a month, they aged by 2E yrs" !omehow these
shows can defy the universal law of ageing" &et me not get into more of it as I thin# this is a
subject worth studying and a complete boo# should be devoted to this" I am sure someone
worthy enough will ta#e up this and understand this completely different universe" But I
would li#e to add that I am one huge fan of these shows" %humps up to ? +orever shows$"
=est of the whole day spent in idle chatting and gossiping" I was glad that my parents did
not bring up the topic of either my job or marriage" I guess I was not ready for emotional
tal#ing right now and guess they sensed that"
5e(t morning, the first thought which flashed through my mind is that I should go and meet
6hinmay" Is he my boyfriend"" no" !o, 0o I have a boyfriend"" and the answer is no"" 5ow I
#now your reaction"" come on" you are 25 and no boyfriend""" how is it possible"" are you
not straight or what""lol" &et me answer the last question first"" I am very much straight so
you can be rest assured that this boo# is not about it"" 'nd reason for me not having a
boyfriend is that I thin# friends who are boys after becoming boyfriends can be divided only
in two categories"" one who clings to you ,and I hate clingy types seriously- or the other
who li#es you clinging to them""" I have not met any guy who thin#s that 2 people though in
relationship needs their own space"" or even girls can be good at finances or who thin# that
girls could also li#e to indulge in intellectual argument from time to time and not only pure
gossip , though that is an intrinsic part of girl nature-" <lease guys don$t get offended, I am
sure some of you might be of the third #ind" But till now have not met one"
'nd now I #now what you are thin#ing""" grapes are sour for me"" whatever"" may be they
are sour"" or may be too sweet for me""
But am hopeful to find someone who can prove my theory wrong"" well for the time being I
am single"""
Bac# to 6hinmay"""we are great friends"" have been friends since school" :e always have
been there for me through thic# and thin" 'nd I being such a bad person always ta#en him
for granted" If ever there is a problem, 6hinmay has a solution or at least some good sound
advice" ;eah, you got me"" I am a person who is constantly in need of advice and support"
What #ind of a central character I am anyways, but what to do"
!o morning came and I rushed to meet 6hinmay" I pressed the doorbell and could hear the
familiar chime of bhajan which I #eep on forgetting always" 'fter sometime 4rs" 8erma,
chinmay$s mot her opened the gate"
9:ello !iddhi, how are you7
95amaste aunty7
90o come inside, so when did you come7
9/nly yesterday7
9'nd how is everyone at home7
93veryone is doing great7
9.ood good"" let me wa#e up 6hini" :e is sleeping till now" ;ou had brea#fast, I was just
going to prepare something for 6hini7
9I had brea#fast at home" 4a will not let me out without having brea#fast7 I smiled"
9Wait here beta"" I will just send him7
While waiting for 6hinmay I flipped through the pages of the newspaper" I could hear aunty
wa#ing him up" 'fter about AE mins, he came out"
9:ey !iddhi"" what a pleasant surprise" 4ummy told me that you came yesterday"7
9;es chini$ I laughed"
6hinmay$s pet name has always been one point for us to fight on" :e hates his pet name
and must have told aunty AEE of times, not to call him by this name" But parenst are
parents and then chini is too sweet to be harsh on his parents for the name" !o he is living
with it, but he disli#es when I call him by this name"
90ont ta#e ?panga$ with me in the morning !iddhi" !o, tell me how are you and how is your
roommate whatever her name is7
9/ho, so you have forgotten her name already" Btw she and her boyfriend both are doing
just great7
9%han# you for the additional piece of information which btw was not required and as#ed
for7
9/ho don$t be sad 6hini"7 I laughed
9oh no no, I am not sad" %his is not a sad face you are loo#ing at" Its just that my facial
muscles all get confused while changing the e(pressions" %his actually is a angry face" ;ou
didn$t have the decency to call me for months while you were in 0elhi" /n top of it no call
after reaching, people do change after moving to big cities"" sometimes what they show on
tv is so right7 :e too# a jibe at me"
95othing li#e that 6hinmay" It was not planned and I thought its better to come and tal# to
you rather than discussing it on phone7
9What happened" :ave your parents decided to finally wash their hands of their 25 year old
mista#e"7 :e win#ed"
9'bsolutely not, they still have hopes on me"7
9/h ho" nice to thin# li#e that" But I thin# the reason is not the hope, it is to save at least
one more life from your madness7
9yeaah""" very funny"7 I said in a defeated tone"
9:ey, what happened" &oo#s li#e there is something serious which needs attention" !o you
want to tell me about it7
9/f course, why the hell you thin# I am here so early in the morning" What time will you be
leaving for your institute7
I forgot to tell you 6hinmay is preparing for I'!" !ince the time I have #nown him, he
always li#e helping people" Whenever we used to discuss about the unethical happening in
the soceity, he used to feel very strongly about it" :e used to say that we should get into
the system and change it" When he decided to prepare for I'!, I applauded him that at
least he is doing what he preached to everyone" But I am a little s#eptical whether one
person can do anything, but then 6hinmay always say that if we #eep on postponing for
everyone to join then nothing will happen ever" 'nyways that is his outloo# and he is doing
what he thin# is right" %oo idealistic for me all these tal#s"
95o problem" I can ta#e a day off"7
95o"" your classes are important" %ell me what time you will be leaving7
9Whats it with everyone about my classes being important" I can easily tell mummy that you
have something important to tal# about and I need to ta#e a day off" :ave some mercy on
poor soul"7
9:ow can I show mercy1 I am the devil herself in disguise7 I smiled"
94y bad luc#" :ave to ma#e friends with all the people but devil"7
9;es you poor poor 6hini"7
9o# fine" I have a full day schedule today" &ets tal# tomorrow then" %omorrow my prof at the
institute is not coming, so I was planning on ta#ing leave tomorrow"7
9.reat" %omorrow then"7
9't least tell me what is the issue, so that I can have something to thin# about in boring
lectures to pass my time7
95othing major" *ust some confusion in career" But will tell you in full detail tomorrow" !ee
you tomorrow then"7
9+ine" I will come to your place early morning and then you can tell me7
I guess I am putting off tal#ing about my state of joblessness" 't least I don$t want that
sympathetic loo# from 6hinmay" I am not sure whether it happens with everyone or not, but
whenever I had some bitter e(perience or difficult moment" Its easier for me to ac#nowledge
it in front of strangers rather than acquaintances and worse still with close people" I guess
the reason behind it the reactions we get from different people" !trangers does not give a
damn about you, whether you are falling down from stairs or whether you are being stopped
at red light by policeman" +or them you are just not there or in case if they ac#nowledge
your presence that is only to tell you that you are wasting their time" 'cquaintances will
merely feel sorry for you and ma#e all the tch tch sounds" But close ones, they become sad
because you are sad, they feel the pain, stupidity, helplessness" 'll the emotions with you
and then you feel more responsible for the whole thing" But in the end it always feels good
to tal# to them and share with them" Its just the first barrier of sharing and e(pressing which
needs to be overcome"
Well I came bac# and spent my day with my 4a" :elping her in the #itchen, household
chores which made her very happy and of course watching, discussing, dissecting all the
characters of our favourite shows" 4others always find happiness in little things you do for
them"
4orning came and along with it 6hinmay" I came out of my room after hearing his voice"
4y mother was scolding 6hinmay for not coming to meet her in my absence"
9.ood that you got up !iddhi" I was just as#ing 6hinmay that why he doesn$t come and
meet us in your absence"7
9!orry aunty" I was busy in my studies but now for sure will ta#e sometime out and come to
meet you7
4a smiled" !he li#es 6hinmay a lot and he is li#e a family to us"
9/# you both tal# now, I will go ahead and finish my morning chores7
9.ood morning sleepyhead" ;ou were sleeping quite late" I thought going to office must
have changed your habits" But loo#s li#e wrong its the other way round" /ffice people must
have changed timings to fit in your sleeping schedule7 :e laughed"
9%here is a limit to something or not" 5ow people can$t even sleep late on holidays and
wee#ends"7
9Why not, why not" *ust #idding7
9;eah, I #now7
9!o now tell me what is that major thing which has confounded you and made you to ta#e
the sudden trip to home7
9<lease be serious7
9o#" I am serious" 5ow do tell me what is the problem7
9I got fired7
9:mm7
9What hmmm" ' parrot will give a better reaction than that7
9oh is it" wait" W::''''''%%%%%%%%%%7
95ow its too much" But o# better than before" 't least I feel something happened in my life
which needs attention"7
9o#" 5ow cut the drama" %ell me what happened7
9/#" 4y company was closing down the unit in which I was wor#ing because it was loosing
money rather than ma#ing it" !o instead of assets suddenly we have turned into liability
which needs to be be ta#en care of" 'nd here I am out of job7
9/#" But not to worry" I am sure you$ll be able to find something much better than that" ;ou
are a smart intelligent girl" +inding a new job will not at all be difficult7
9;eah" I guess"7
95o" 5ot guess, I am AEEJ confident about it"7
9;eah7
9o# but what is the confusion in it" I thin# you are doing the right thing of spending
sometime with your family and ta#ing rest" %hen you can go bac# and start applying"7
9;eah thats true""""7
9Why this trail off" 0o you have something else in your mind7
95ot really7
9%ell me even if its unimaginable or unthin#able" I have such a imagination that i can pull
out a rabit from hat just be thin#ing"7
96an you ever be serious7
9/f course" /f course" What I was trying to say" &et me be the judge of the fact whether
what you are thin#ing is anyway near to reality or completely impractical li#e you7
9!ee there you go again" .od #nows why I even bother tal#ing to you7
9o#" I am sorry" so you tell me what is that you are thin#ing about7
9!ee when I was wor#ing in this company, I was not happy" I #now that I am sad right now
because I lost the job" But I guess its more because I lost the feeling of being independent
and good paychec#" But if I weigh how much it is actually because of the fact I lost the job,
I guess its almost none7
9o#7
9When I was wor#ing in the company, I used to crib about everything wor#, culture, people,
their mindset, everything" I never found the wor# mentally stimulating, challenging" <eople
there were happy that they are getting the same routine wor# for so many years which
requires little effort and gets them good salaries" I feel stagnated and suffocated there"7
9/#" I get it" !o have you thought about any alternate career option7
95o7
98ery typical" ;ou #now that you dont li#e to do that wor# but do not #now that what you
want to do7 :e smiled
9;eah, I #now it sounds quite funny" But I just can$t help it7
9/#" !o thin#" %hin# what you want to do e(actly, at least have some idea that what #ind of
wor# will stimulate you7
9%hin#ing will need time7
9/f course it will need time" ;ou have to focus and understand what you want7
9But there is one problem"7
9'nd what is that7
I can see that he is trying hard not to smile at my childish thoughts but failing miserably"
9<lease 6hinmay, it$s not funny7 I was a little pissed"
9o# o#" 5ow tell me what is the problem7
9%he thing is that I thin# my parents are thin#ing of my marriage7
9'nd how do you #now that1 :ave they tal#ed to you about it7
95o7
9then7
9Well, I tal#ed to Ishi#a and she thin#s that is the reason 4a and 0ad wants me to come
home after I lost my job7
9Wow" awesome7
9whats awesome in it7
9%his completely solves your problem"7
94ay I as# how7
9!imple" ;ou don$t want to wor#7
9:ellllooo, I never said don$t want to wor#"" only I didn$t li#e my previous job7
9o# mam, correction"" you didn$t li#e your previous job and you are not sure whether to join
similare type of wor# or not" !econdly, you want time to thin# about it" =ight17
9=ight7
9!o marry a guy who earns a lot"" so you don$t have to wor# and just spend your time
thin#ing7
9I will #ill you 6hinmay7
:e started laughing"
9:ere I am trying to tal# about such a serious issue and all you are doing is ma#ing fun of
me" ;ou are the limit7
9'nd you too are the limit" ;ou girls have this unique ability of turning a mountain out of a
molehill" :ave you ever thought you parents could be worried about you and called you
home" 'nd anyways eventually you have to marry, so what is the harm in case even if they
want to start searching7
9;eah"" but I don$t want to marry right now"7
9'nyways whats the connection between your parents thin#ing about your marriage and
your thin#ing about your career7
9If I will be wor#ing then there is less chance of me getting married" If I will be sitting idle at
home, then I don$t have any e(cuse to get out of this situation7
"7Wonderful reasoning" but what I will suggest is that you wait till your parents raise the
topic about marriage unless you are very #een on getting married" =ight now you just
concentrate on finding what you want to do7
9;eah" 3ven I was thin#ing the same" Its Ishi#a only which put all these stupid thoughts in
my head7
9;eah" I #now7 'nd he laughed out loud"
90on$t worry !iddhi, we will thin# of something" &et us both thin# about it and then meet
again to see if we can narrow down to something7
9;eah that sounds good7
9o# then I$ll leave now" !ee you tomorrow in much better spirits7
9I hope se" bye then7
Chapter )
*earing my thinking cap
!eriously people who are able to understand what they want to do are very luc#y" 'nd I will
say the ones who find their calling at a young age are the true blessed ones" But I thin#
most of the people don$t have a clue about what they want in life or what they really want to
become"
+rom a very young age, we have been instilled with the idea that being an engineer or a
doctor is the only profession which counts" If a child is interested in sports, music or any
other such activity, he is told that it is good to have these things as hobby but one can not
ma#e a career out of it" =eason being simple that it ta#es lot of luc# and hard wor# and
time to start earning or to ma#e a mar# in these fields" Whereas if you are doing
engineering, before even leaving the campus you have a good job in your hand with a
decent salary ,well salary is directly proportional to the ran#ing of your college-" !o you
come out of college and you are earning such an amount which your father started earning
after AE years into service"
'nd who is not attracted by money" 3veryone tries to remain happy #nowing that on Ast of
every month you will be getting a good deal of money in your hand and you can maintain a
good lifestyle of your choice" 'nd that is the reason why after not being satisfied with the
wor# I was doing, I didn$t left the company" 'nd would have continued to do so for I don$t
#now how long, may be till that point of time when my company would have thrown me out"
!o, why am I thin#ing about it now" I can easily go and do that job again" 3arn money and
a good lifestyle" What the hell has changed in A wee#" /ne thing which has changed is that
now I have a ban# balance"" yup"" I do have some amount"" not grand but I can survive
couple of months without ta#ing help from my parents" Its not that my parents will not give
me money if I as# them, but its so out of fashion these days as#ing your parents to help
you out" 'nd second reason is that I don$t #now how my life will be after marriage, so I
want to do a little e(ploration before jumping into it" It may be true that I may not find
anything and have to go bac# to the job but at least I will have the satisfaction that atleast I
tried"
I am sure after reading it, you must be thin#ing that I #now what I want to do ne(t" But that
is the problem I tal# big but I don$t #now what I want to do" 'nd that is what the whole
problem is" +inding out what I want to do"
Who said sitting idle, doing nothing, just thin#ing is the easiest job on earth" In fact, I$ll say
that it is one of the most difficult job which becomes more tough when you dont have any
in#ling about from where you should start thin#ing" But then I have ta#en this tas# upon
myself, so I wore my thin#ing cap,figuratively- to do it"
I heard somebody saying that the #ey to present lies in the past and though many people
say its better to forget the past" I thought delving into the past to find out what I wanted to
do as a #id, might be the thing I would li#e to do as a grown up too"
!o I started thin#ing hard" 6ome on I was just a #id then, how many memories have one of
a thin#ing #id but yes, one was very prominent and I am sure must be shared by every #id
after watching and reading about superheroes to find out that they too belong to that elite
class of people with super powers and are here to save this world" But soon enough you
realise that you get to #now that its a story and there is no !anta coming to give you gifts"
!o of course we have to move to the ne(t one" !o I started rac#ing my brain again trying to
remember something of substance and then bang" /f course, I should have tal#ed to my
4a" I used to recite everything I wanted to become to her all the time, she must be
remembering at least half of it if not all" 'nd so I went out from my room in search of her
and there she was cutting vegetables in front of %8 where else"
94a, do you remember what I was to become when I was a #id7
9;ou, you wanted to become almost everything that came across your way7 !he smiled
affably"
9;eah yeah I #now, still there must be some special things which I must have wanted to do
as a #id"7
9o#" when you were I guess 2 yr old, you wanted to drive car sitting in your father$s lap7
9no no, not so small 4a" =eally, you are ma#ing fun of me, I am serious" ' little grown up,
may be 5@K yrs or little later than that"
9o#" &et me thin#, detective"" no no that was later""" magiccccccc"""" nah"" yes you wanted to
become a pilot" 0on$t #now why you wanted to but I #now why you didn$t7 !he laughed
9;eah yeah" I #now7
<ilot" yes, I wanted to become a pilot" I guess every small #id have a fascination with the
)oom sound they used to hear whenever a plane flew above their head or those little tail
lights which shines brightly at the night ma#ing other stars loo# dull in comparison" &oo#ing
at something flying even a small bird used to create such a wonderment,yes it used to be
then- "then how come such a huge plane flying high above growling and roaring will not be"
'nd that puff of smo#e high up in the s#y which the plane leaves behind used to loo#
majestic"
%hen suddenly the door bell rang bringing me out of my revierie" It was 6hinmay"
9:ello 'unty" :ello !iddhi" !o whats happening7
95othing 6hinmay, I was jsut as#ing 4a about what all things I used to say when I was a
little #id7
9!he was as#ing me what she wanted to become when she was a #id7 4a interjected"
9/h really" :ow interesting, please do tell me what she wanted to become7
9<ilot7 I said
9<ilot, yes fascinating" Why did you drop the idea of being a pilot then7
9I have to drop the idea when I discovered that I am among those few blessed ones, pun
intended- who have the fear of sitting in ferris wheels and merry go round" /n top of it
anything which goes up and down or round and round at good speed ma#e me feel
nauseated" When I have discovered this unadventurous trait of my personality, I thought
better to quit now then to regret later" %hough in recent times I have discovered that I am
not a bad flyer, e(cept a few episodes of nausea and vomiting" ;i#eesss, yes those were
bad flying moments for fellow passengers" !o of course pilot is not something which I want
to become now"7
9/#, then what was the ne(t thing which came to your mind when you realised that you can
not become a pilot7
9%hought of becoming a detective was a very prominent one since the day I read m"y first
mystery boo#" 'll those 5ancy 0rews, :ardy Boys, !herloc# :olmes used to be so larger
than life characters which though were humans but possess the ability to go beyond the
average human mind" 'nd seriously this is something which fascinates me even now but
my observation capability and limited common sense ma#es it an occupation well above my
reach"
4agic again li#e everything is a fantasy come true" When you see magician$s going through
the walls, coming out of the chained bo(es and doing what not, you just wish deep down
that I wish if I could do it" But why I don$t want to do it, for one it requires lots of patience,
commitment and hard wor#" 'nd patience is something which I don$t have"
/#, so these were my fantasy jobs which I can not ever ever pull off" .etting down to the
brass trac#s, to the things with in my reach which something I could have done instead of
ta#ing a degree in engineering" %here has to be something which I must have li#ed " In the
past AE years of my life, I have not thought or done anything e(cept to try to reach where I
am right now" In AEth standard, it was a race to get good scores to secure a position in
science stream, then this race become tougher as the number of competitors increased to
secure a position in a good engineering college" It does not stop here, had to maintain a
good overall 6.<I to be allowed to sit in good companies coming for placement and then
finally getting placed in a good company" Its not that I have not enjoyed college, I did" But
most of the time went watching %8 series or movies on &'5 or spending time with friends
in canteens" 'nd once I joined the job, thin#ing about alternate career or a serious hobby
just never crossed my mind" &ife has become series of wee#days and wee#ends, instead of
days which sometime are hectic and sometimes are la)y" 4y teenage days have become
li#e a distant dream now, memories of those days are there but they have gathered layers
and layers of dust" 'nd as wor#ing through those layers of dust reveals whats lies beneath,
I am sure I will be able to rediscover the one thing which used to give me joy"7
9%hese #ind of things which I have written till now is thought by the people who want to
postpone or never wanted to really change anything" %hey just #eep on thin#ing and
thin#ing and later leave it at that saying that it didn$t happen, may be it was not supposed to
happen" ;ou #now what !iddhi, I thin# if you have to thin# so hard about doing what you
want to do, then you never wanted to do it in the first place" ;ou are saying I could not do
this and do that, but if people really want to do something, they try to overcome their fear"
;ou said you can not become pilot, its not that you have some physical issues, its all
mental" I am not here to give you a lecture but really you are just procrastinating"7
9%hats not fair 6hinmay" Why are you being so mean, its not that I dont want to wor#7
9o#, so you don$t want to continue in the I% field as you are not getting bored doing the
routine stuff" Is that right7
9=ight7
9But you li#e studying and gaining #nowledge and brain storming and thin#ing about it" Is
this correct17
96orrect7
9%hen you have two options" 3ither become a lecturer somewhere or pursue higher studies
and go into research7
9o####7
9:mmm, I can see that these doesn$t sound very fantastic options to you" 4ay I #now the
reason 17
9Well, being a lecturer is too much responsibility and then well money is not so much7
9o#7
9'nd as for pursuing higher studies, I don$t thin# my parents will agree to it" 'ccording to
them, finding a match for a highly qualified girl is very difficult"7
9o#" But if they agree, do you really want to do it"7
9I am not sure" <h0 and all is a little too steep even for me"7
9:mm" I get that, so you want to sit at home, be comfortable doing nothing and earning
loads of money" 4y dear girl, that is not going to happen unless you marry a super richie
rich guy7 :e started laughing and I felt so silly sitting there in front of him"
9o#, enough of silly nonsense" 3ither you really have something up your sleeve or you are
plain bored of your current job hence all this silly thoughts in your mind" What I will suggest
is to stop thin#ing and just ta#e some rest" .ive yourself at least a wee#$s time and then we
will see how you feel about it" By the way, you remember !wati, one of our school friend- ,
she is getting married"7
9!eriously, thats great" !o finally our batch mates have started getting married" %his shows
that our time is not far behind7
6hinmay smiled at her comment, 95ot in near future at least, !o why donLt you come with
me and enjoy other people getting married till then7
9;eah o#" !ure" let me chec# with 4a also once7
9'nd <ooja is also going to be there" !he will be reaching tomorrow afternoon"7
9Is it1 %hat$s great" Its been such a long time since I have seen her" :er father got
transferred right during A2th7
9;eah" &ong time but I am sure she will be her chatty usual self"7
9%hen I have to come to this wedding" I will as# my mother and update you"7
9+ine, let me #now about your program" I should better leave now, its getting late" Bye7
9Bye7
I really hate it when 6hinmay tal#s li#e that but as always he was tal#ing sense and well
idea of doing nothing especially not thin#ing feels great" !o I decided not to thin# about
anything and just enjoy my stay at home for the time being"
I chec#ed with my mother about going to the wedding with 6hinmay and she was o# with it
as long as I come bac# with in the timeline defined" Well of course, timeline is always there
and if you miss it one time, then you have to put some e(tra effort in convincing your
parents the ne(t time you want to go out" I wish it could be more li#e office, #eep on
missing deadline still manager will #eep on giving you wor#" 'nyways, I got the permission
so I called up 6hinmay to inform him that I will be coming for the wedding"
6hapter K
!iddharth Mapoor
:e was sitting alone in the dar#ness of night, loo#ing at the distant stars, trying to find
something in between those twin#ling forms" !o immersed was he in his s#y ga)ing that it
loo#ed li#e as if he really have found something written there" 5ight was so still, it seemed
li#e as if it is also concentrating along with him and help him decipher the messages which
are conjured by the moon and the stars" %hat eerie silence which loo#ed li#e it was
emanating from him has enveloped everything, and suddenly it was bro#en by the hooting
of the owl" %hat bro#e his reverie and made him come bac# to the present" Was it really
hooting of the owl or he just imagined that sound"
95o, how could it be owl hooting" In these structures of glasses and concrete, where it is
difficult to find a sparrow, an owl hooting is impossible" !ound must have come from some
movie played by someone downstairs7 he thought"
Its almost li#e a ritual to him, come bac# from office, have food, spend sometime watching
%8 and then come and sit on the terrace" :e sits quietly there, loo#ing at the hori)on"
!ometimes he #nows what he is thin#ing about, but mostly it is a state of thoughtlessness
almost li#e meditation" 'part from these daily rituals, he come on terrace when he is feeling
lonely or sad or when he is very happy" ;es, being alone in the night and with 9:I47" :e
has grown up listening to his motherLs teachings about ./0, tal#ing about him as if he is
there loo#ing at us, ta#ing care of us always" 'nd though most of the teachings are difficult
to implement, he still got the conviction that he is there loo#ing after him but this conviction
has come with a twist" !omehow when he is confined in the man made walls he find
himself separated from 9:I47" Its only when he is out in open with quietness surrounding
him, then only he gets this feeling that yes now he is there loo#ing at him and listening to
him from where ever he is" 'nd ga)ing at s#y helps as they say he is sitting there
somewhere in the heaven" !o its li#e almost face to face communication" ;eah, that sure
sounds cra)y as hell" ' psychic fellow may be tal#ing to himself alone in the nights as he
does not have a anything better to do with his life" &ets not jump to conclusions without
meeting in person, shall we" &et us say that it almost li#e writing a diary e(cept that it is
more a audio #ind of diary without any records"
!uddenly a sound came from downstairs"
9!iddharth, you left your phone downstairs" Its ringing from past A5 mins, man" 6ome
downstairs and pic# it up7
9/#" 6oming"7
%he phone was ringing at the top of its capability indicating that this time also ringing has
been going on from sometime ,ringing mode is set to ascending as always-" I wal#ed
quic#ly to find that phone is coming from none other than highest authority in my life, my
mother"
9:ello 4ummy7
9:ello !iddhu" Where have you been, I was calling you from such a long time" 5o
response, I was worried"7
9%um bhi na, mummy" Where will I go, I was here only" *ust went outside for some fresh air
and forgot to pic# my phone" But you tell me what happened which made you call me AEE
times in A5 minutes7
9AEE %I43!" Would not have called you even AE times" 're you listening !iddhuLs father,
what is your son saying" %his newer generation, first they will not pic# the phone and when
the other person calls again because he is worried than you get to hear this"7
96ome on mummy, cut out this drama" I am sure there must be something" Mya baat hai7
9:umph7
9/# baba" I ta#e my words bac# my dear mother" 5ow tell me7
9o# o#" !top this buttering up" ;ou #now !harma uncle, the one who is wor#ing in your
0adLs office7
9;es, so7
9:e came yesterday along with his wife for dinner and during conversation tal# of your
marriage came up7
9&o gayi bhains paani mein7 !id thought in his mind but said, 9o#7
9:is brother@in@law is also loo#ing for a suitable match for his daughter who incidentally has
gone to #anpur to attend her friendLs marriage"7
9I don$t li#e the direction this conversation is moving towards at all" I told you n number of
time that I am not interested in marriage right now"7
9'rre, you people" Who is as#ing you to get married tomorrow in the same mundup" 'll I
am as#ing is to just go and meet her"7
9What a stupid idea" :ow can I go in anyoneLs wedding without invitation7
9;ou donLt worry about that" I have already tal#ed to !harma ji about that" Its a home affair
and he will tal# to his brother@in@law about your going and meeting his daughter there"7
9Whats the problem in meeting her someplace else, li#e over a cup of coffee7
9I don$t want any arguments in this relation !iddhu" ;ou better buy a good outfit to wear
tomorrow" 'nd better ta#e some gift for the wedding couple, don$t go empty handed7
9/f course mummy, I #now that" But can you not please drop this whole idea" 's such I am
not interested in meeting a girl and on top of it I am not ready to go to any wedding
uninvited" Imagine how embarrassing it will prove if someone as# me from whose side I
am7
9'e le lo, what is in there to be embarrased about" ;ou are going there to meet a girl with
the consent of your and her parents" 'nd anyways, if someone as#s you from whose side
you are" *ust tell them from brideLs side7
9Its completely futile discussing anything with you" +ine, I will go7
9!ona beta, #yun ji !iddhus de daddy" I always told you #now that !iddhu will never said
no to his mother7
94ummy, cut out the drama" 'nd tell me how the hell will I recogni)e her and whats her
name7
95ow you are coming to the point7
:e could almost hear his mother smile over the phone"
9:er name is <ooja7 she said"
9+ine, and how will I recogni)e her"7
98ery easy"7
95ow don$t as# me to go on stage and as# the bride to show me who the girl is7
9Well that$s the plan7
96ome on" 're you serious, if that$s the case, then I am not going"7
9/ho !iddhu, you are too naive" /f course, you need not go and as# the bride" %hough this
also seems li#e to be a good idea but as I have not thought about it earlier" !o there is
change in the plan, we are sending you the snap of the girl"7
9'lright" 0oes she have my photograph too17
95o, we didn$t had any" 'nyways she #nows that you will be coming" 'lso, smsing you her
number, so get in touch with her once you reach there7
9'lright, fine" &et me see, I will confirm my plans by tomorrow evening"7
95o !iddhu, all this will not wor#" ;ou have to go and that$s it"7
9't least give me sometime to thin# about it mummy" Its all so sudden, I don$t even want t
get married right now" 'nd you are as#ing me to go to a wedding tomorrow to meet a girl"
.ive me a brea#"7
9What rubbish" ;ou are tal#ing li#e a small #id" Why you are ma#ing such a big deal about
it" *ust thin# of it as going to a wedding and meeting new people"7
9But please try and understand, I don$t want to go7
9'lright, do whatever you have to do" 5ow we have become old , who will listen to us" ;ou
people have mind of your own, are well educated, obviously you people #now better than
us7
9+ine, stop this blac#mailing" 5obody can win in a verbal dual with you" 'lright you win, I
will go"7
9;ou are the best !iddhu" /#" I will call you tomorrow" Bye7
9;eah o#" Bye" .ood night7
'fter the phone call, he just sat there with a blan# e(pression" What can he do" :e was not
able to win any single argument where his mother was concerned" !he always had the
upper hand as she has perfected the art of emotional blac#mail" :e smiled involuntarily
while thin#ing about his mother" 'nd then he reali)ed what he had gotten himself into" :e
has not given marriage a thought till now" :e completed his 6' only last year, thought its
true that he has been wor#ing in this firm for sometime now" But still marriage, thatLs a huge
step" :e understands that with marriage comes lot of responsibility, but he is o# with it" :e
is more concerned with finding the right partner"
9Bullshit !id, you are just passing time thin#ing about all this" :ow will you find the right
match unless you venture out in the open and start meeting people" I thin# mummy is
correct, whats the harm in meeting her" In fact its better that you are getting an opportunity
to meet her alone without thin#ing that parents are sitting outside and may be someone is
eavesdropping or will come with snac#s plate in between of aw#ward question7 he thought"
9;es, at least he should go and meet her"7
6hapter K
%he wedding