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an Abused Child
The Raid
In the early morning of September 5, 2013, the German police raided
the homes of our families in Klosterzimmern (86738 Deiningen) and our
home at the Georg-Ehnes-Platz 2, 91637 Wrnitz. The parents and their
children were still in bed at the time.
The children were between
the ages of 1 to 17 years old,
and five infants between the
ages of 2 and 7 months.
They were taken away from
their parents without their
consent by a massive force of
dozens of police officers and
social workers. The parents
were informed that their
children would be taken to unknown places and given to unknown foster
families. Any attempts by parents to contact their children were rigorously
denied. The mothers of infants are still with the babies, but their custody
also is temporarily denied.
The reasons?
The Nrdlingen district
court issued a preliminary order
for the temporary withdrawal of
custody based on its perception
of a very high immediate risk
to the mental well-being of the
children. The only legal facts in
this decision, however, are that the parents of the children are part of the
faith of the Twelve Tribes. What is the legal basis in this? People cannot be
found guilty based on their association with a religious faith. Will we be
treated differently from any other citizen simply because of our beliefs?
No specific evidence was produced against any individual affected.
Obviously, the court considered it irrelevant to first get an accurate picture of the children and their well-being. The courts decision came without
any warning. The police and the youth welfare office presented us with a fait
accompli, with all their facts pre-arranged. A previous visit promised by
the judge never took place...
Ill never forget this; and I believe the our God is going to do the same
to those that did this to us. Thats what I hope.
to read to me the name of my lawyer. Frau Juliane Hock. What? Not one
person told me about her. They didnt want to give me the name.
Then Herr Spitzbart and Frau Ziegler came to visit Jonathan. First it was
all nice smalltalk, but I think they only try to be so nice so that after they can
say that everything is so good and the children are very happy now. But I
didnt want to be so nice. I wanted to tell them what I feel. Jonathan hung on
to me the whole time. He wouldnt even show his face to them once.
Before I had spoken with Frau Assenbaum about my situation
that I felt betrayed I said that the Jugendamt made many promises
but they just betrayed me. But she only told me that I have to be careful
with what I say, and that the Jugendamt might send me home because I
accuse them too much.
So when they were there and spoke with Frau Assenbaum, she wanted
that I would tell them what I had to say. But I said Im not going to say anything if youre just going to send me home. And they said, No, no, we wont
send you home. But right away, they turned my words around to mean that
I dont want to go home. NO! I do want to go home, but I find it unreasonable and irresponsible to leave my sister here alone. My sister is not going
anywhere without me. So they said, OK, you wont be separated.
I told them that all the children should go home as quickly as possible.
Then they asked about Jonathan. I said it is not going good with him since
he is separated from his parents. He screams the whole night. I cant even
sleep. I confronted them that they said the parents would be in contact with
the children. But now the parents dont even know where the children are!
And also that on September 5 they promised me a lawyer and she never
came. The answer was: Well, the children are well taken care of. But this
answer I could not stand. I could only say that I know those children, and
I know that they are suffering being separated from their parents, and it is
not going well with them. So they can tell themselves all they want as long
as they want, but the children are not doing well.
I confronted them with the case of the Argentinian couple who only
came for a few months for work, and just because they lived in the sect
they took their little son away. I find this very brutal, what they do to the
children. The Jugendamt mishandled the Twelve Tribes children. The
Jugendamt social workers are doing great psychological damage to the children, and their excuse for that is that they are responsible to make sure the
accusations against us are true and to protect the children.
I know that these children, whom I know personally, have never ever in
their life been abused. But the social services puts everything in one lump. I
6
dont understand why all the children were taken away. They dont see us as
individuals, and I think that is very unfair.
We saw a film on the TV about child abuse. I found it so brutal. I have
never in my life experienced anything like that. I cant bear it anymore how
the parents of the sect were framed. I only know one thing, and that is
that I never, ever want to leave my parents.
continue on. So I got scared that we wouldnt be able to keep contact with
my parents especially Merea. So I have to be careful that I dont jeopardize my contact with my parents, because I cannot trust the Jugendamt. The
contact I have with my parents, and Mereas contact with them, is the most
precious thing I have.
I think I have a free will. My parents are accused because of child abuse.
We all are declared a sect and we are seen as criminals. I dont want to go to
school because I dont want to make a fool of myself. I dont want to go there
just so they can laugh about my faith and mock me. And what if the police
drives me to school! I dont understand what they will accomplish through
all this. I am here because of Merea. And if I am not here because of her,
then school is not worth going to. They took me by police force away from
home, they can also take me to school that way.
would live at home, all of this wouldnt be so bad; I could get it all out in the
evenings and then in the morning get strengthened.
I am so finished. I cannot trust anybody. I feel myself a hypocrite. I live
community without community. Everything in me only wants to go home.
But on the other hand, I want to stay with Merea that she wouldnt be left
alone. I feel as if I am torn in pieces.
Merea was today as if she was on drugs. She acted pretty unusual. She
was content and extremely happy and excited. Last night she still cried that
she had to go to school and that she couldnt see her parents. She cried on
the telephone with our parents, that she was away so long and wanted to see
them so bad. But afterward it was said that my abba made a bad impression
on her and it wasnt good for her. But I know that it was NOT the case. No
one can talk me into that.
This afternoon Frau Kundlinger and Herr Siegler came to talk to me. I
could not stand their whole explanation. She told me that on the 2nd of October we have the court case. So long still! I must go home! I cannot stand it
anymore! I want to go home! The whole day I ate only one slice of bread and
had not one sip of water. I needed to go to the doctor today to get my health
checkup. But my blood pressure is weak. I feel very weak.
appointment with the court. My sister and I must go home! We miss our
parents. We love them and they love us. Its good that Frau Assenbaum is
not home right now. But maybe when she comes home I can have a clear
talk with her. But Frau Assenbaum says shes staying out of the whole
thing and shes innocent about everything. I told her that she is a hypocrite and that she cannot think that she can stay out of it when she is taking care of us.
It is exactly the same thing as the time with the persecution of the Jews.
It all happens so slowly. Everything happens as slow as a snail. And every
one thinks that they dont have anything to do with it. But suddenly its too
late. I will not let anyone hinder me and I will not just swallow everything. I
will fight against it until we can go back.
It seems like Jonathan must go to a different foster family so that his
imma cannot come and have so much contact with him. It is all so inhuman
and dramatic. He will be totally destroyed and his soul torn. As if it isnt
enough that he is away from his imma, but to change again and put him in
a different place so he would forget his imma! But I guess this is the goal
that the children would forget. It is so terrible. I do not want that any of the
children would forget their parents and forget the reason they were born.
The only purpose in life is that they will take on the faith of their parents
and carry it out!
day was there and I didnt want this day to come. Oh, that I had wings
like a dove, I would fly away to refuge. And then I could pass my wings
on to Merea... Oh, what a dream. I have got to wake up! Reality is hitting
me.
I slept too long and now I have to hurry up. Why do we need to be
there? I woke up Merea, told her to be a good girl, prayed with her, and said
good-bye. Now I was full of anticipation of what I was going to wait for in
town. I wanted to go to the shopping center. It wasnt open. I still had 1
hours before school, and I had arranged it to meet someone in that shopping center. Where should I wait? I dont know town so well. I waited where
we had danced on a Shabbat once.
The WE met. We had a good time. I showed them my school and I
received lots of encouragement, and a big SALAD from my best friend.
Today I felt a bit better, even though I had a hard time to say good-bye, that
it almost made me cry.
There are some nice girls in my school. All the boys are really strange
in my group except maybe that one Chamite boy, who seems to be the most
normal. Well, I dont know them so well. By the way, most girls are really
messed up, too. I will be too, if I stay too long. Other than that, I hate that
school, just for what we should be learning there.
Basically, youre being taught that a gas stove exists, that you are able
to actually create something expensive to eat, and that a sewing needle can
be useful in life, and that cleaning means to really clean. I am already, after
the third day, totally bored. Its the worst thing that could happen to you. I
never felt so bored in my entire life, so useless. Many times I feel like a fat
pig just sitting down, not being able to do anything.
Now Jonathan is being expected to stop nursing. How terrible! I dont
understand. I need somebody to understand me. My lawyer doesnt stand
up for me. No one does. The whole world wants to think that I am doing
fine. They want me to wear their same smile and say Im fine. I dont want
to! Im finished and kaput.
I cant let go! I have to continue fighting.
done it, but I think he must have had a belly ache. She then blames me for
feeding him too much. What can I do? Nothing! It isnt me, its she that
provides food. I too would be sick of her food by now, and I really am.
I dont understand why they would take us away from our parents and
give us to parents that dont even like us or show understanding in any way.
They were acting really strange today towards me. It seems to me that they
dont believe me; they probably see me as a liar.
Today it was a relief to get into the bus and drive to town. There you
are alone. Sometimes its a refuge nobody cares about you, and you dont
care about anybody. But I didnt want to stay at peace with that. I decided to
call the judge herself. I was going to tell her that I dont have any rights since
I left my parents and I need a lawyer. The one they gave me was not on our
side and didnt defend me in any way. I am unjustly treated.
I called, and nobody answered. I tried again. The secretary answered.
She said that the judge was in a meeting and that she was giving her a message and I should call later. Oh no! I know those stories. I want her now! It
isnt possible. So I decided to call again. This time the judge was still in a
meeting. I received the message from her that I should either write a letter
or wait for my appointment. NO! I thought, Its crazy. They dont want me
to bother them. I wanted to scream, I NEED HELP! I hated it so many
people, big city, nobody cares about you, and you dont care about anyone. I
need help. Its not right.
When I arrived home the atmosphere hadnt changed. They were still
full of strange behavior towards me. They twist everything I say, and what
they hear about us, and make it sound weird and right at the same time. I
cannot go on like this. I have to get myself and my little sister out of here,
but Im so tired. They scare you, they finish you up, until you think you are
nothing, and you are powerless, and then youre so scared to do anything.
Thats how they keep us locked up in fear. Somehow we cannot give in. I
wont. I will fight until were free. It isnt right. If theyd really care about us,
they would want to talk to me and not push me off like that all the time.
By the way, Jonathans situation is CRAZY. All of a sudden, our caretakers are viewing us with completely different eyes. They are so confused
and just twist everything. They believe the lies.
Good night. No, bad night!
She is quite at the end of her nerves and reacts to us a lot. She seems to have
no understanding at all. It seems to me like a terrible nightmare. I have no
guts to continue. I cant handle it, to hear all those accusations.
Sometimes I feel strange. Theres no boundaries in the world. Theres so
many undergrounds in school there, too. Maybe its just that they are so
dull that they are over-grounds. Its not that they exclude me. Rather, they
try to include me, but sometimes I just dont want it. Im scared that theyd
get overfamiliar with me (especially all those crazy ones). Its not my place
and I know where my place is.
I get along with some of the girls here. There is one 16-year-old girl who
is very shy and also didnt know anybody when she came to the school. Im
less shy so she likes to be my partner, since we both feel a bit lost sometimes.
Its good when youre not the only one. Another girl can sympathize with
me, being in a home and under authority of the Jugendamt.
Theres also a Muslim girl. Shes 18 and she wears the headcovering.
We both dont go to religion. Shes very nice but a bit shy or maybe passive. Another girl is 19. She somehow makes me think thats how my imma
was when she was young. Shes social and most normal to me. Shes not the
showing-off type like some younger girls here. She puts me in the circle
when I stand on the side. Another girl is 15 (going to turn 16 on Sunday).
Shes like me when Im home. Shes a talker and always has something to
say. Shes outgoing, kind of wild and hyper more like a 15-year-old. Shes
nice but more like me, kind of arrogant and over confident.
Oh my, its all the world. I hate it altogether. But I try to see the people
behind their masks, and it is possible, I realize, that they are just people like
me. But they are hopeless. They dont have a future. They dont have what I
have. They think they have everything they need and want, but they dont. It
makes me so thankful on one hand, but sad on the other. I dont want to be
separated. I dont want Merea to be either.
Jonathan is supposedly staying, but can only nurse once a day. Merea and I
are able to see our parents on Monday in some public house in town. The youth
department is in a big confusion. Now, all of a sudden, they make Ansbach
responsible for us. They just managed to put our whole story on Donau Ries
and now they are transferring everything back to Ansbach. Donau Ries youth
department told Merea to call my parents ten minutes a week at 3:00 pm on
Monday. Now Ansbach is giving new times. What does it change anyways?
I have to do something before that. Otherwise they will blame my parents for talking me into something. Its crazy. They change their minds full
time and change their people around. Im out!
15
But to our surprise they didnt wait until morning. The youth department ordered us back immediately. They wouldnt let us stay the night. Are
they really giving children their rights? What they blame our parents for
doing, they are doing themselves.
By that time I was also in bed. It was 10 pm. That woman then encouraged us to go with them, so we got up and went with the police. I was yelling at them. They felt so bad for us, but thats their job. They drove us back
to our foster parents. I was so afraid of what was awaiting me there, and I
guessed right.
They were so mad. They said I couldnt stay there. The police tried to
calm them down; they kind of defended me and told us to get things cleared
up. They warned me of doing that again because it might hurt my little sister. Then they left. I went to sleep. Somehow I still didnt feel bad about my
decision, but I feared what the next morning would bring.
eat. Merea doesnt want to go with us but they dont leave us alone anymore.
Jonathan isnt in such good spirits today. Im writing letters. I thought about
writing to Angela Merkel. Maybe Ill write to her.
This afternoon relatives of the Assenbaums came for coffee and cake.
Jonathan ate 1 pieces of cake. Today is elections. Angela Merkel was voted
in. FDR is raus. Oh well, I dont like politics. What does it have to do with
me? Maybe I put my hope in that. But maybe they can do something for me.
Good night.
P.S. Happy because tomorrow we can talk with abba and imma in Ansbach. Merea is so, so, so happy, and I am also!
Merea legally for once. It was worse than I thought. Three people were
watching us. One overseeing (youth department), one taking notes, and
one, I think, interviewing us.
First thing I said was that I wanted them to sit around the table with
us. They refused. I said that I felt more comfortable if I saw them and they
wouldnt sit behind my back like that. They said no, they wouldnt. ITS
CRAZY! I got so worked up about them, so I started talking to my parents
about how I feel mistreated by the youth department and everyone else that
goes by them. I was so mad at them. Then we just spoke English.
Anyway, they care beans which language you talk because theyll
anyways write what they want to write. And then they will send what
they think is most important to the judge. It was nice, though, to see my
parents.
Whenever I get really worked up about something those people would
tell me that you are here of your own free will, you can go home if you want,
so dont say anything. I get so indignant. Pure Levite. I need my rights. I
told them that it was unfair to give me such a late appointment because Im
really fighting for it and others already got their appointments with the
judge a few days ago. Maybe I irritate them with the way I am, so they have
me wait extra long. But I dont care, Ill irritate them even more.
Levites fight and Im going to fight and not let them get me down. I will
do my small part to get all of us out. There are sooo many more pages to
write about just today, but I cant anymore. When Im home, Ill talk!
her that maybe my sister was coming. Hannah came together with Barak and
Shalhevet, and I was so happy. It was as if we were never separated.
Barak went over my letter for me because he is a good German teacher
and a good lawyer for me. We talked a lot together. Then they all walked
with me back to school. It was very difficult for me to say goodbye to them.
The rest of the day was very depressing. The beautiful dream was over
and the terrible nightmare continued. This afternoon I felt threatened by
someone. He approached me strange and wanted something from me.
Sometimes fear comes to me. I know here I have no protection, and I know
that for Merea there is no protection. It is very difficult for me.
took him away from me, since he was hanging on me, and sat him into the
high chair to eat. It was 6:30 am. The foster mother said he should feed him
so he stops screaming. I was waiting in the hallway for the lady. Until we
left, he didnt stop yelling. I feel so terrible inside. I wish I could love him,
but it seems we cannot do anything.
This afternoon I went on an outing. We went to a nice big lake. There
we could spend some nice time in peace. My sister took a letter for me to
stick into the mail box. Thank you, Hannah, best friend.
When I came home, Merea and Jonathan came to pick me up with the
foster father. How sweet. They were so delighted to pick me up from the bus
station with the car.
The foster father just told me that the police asked if it had something
to do with the Twelve Tribes. He told them it didnt at all have anything to
do with us this time. I hope they dont make a big story about that one. You
never know, they lie so much.
Bye, bye Shai, hope to see you soon. Latest on Monday in town. But
shell probably just stay one night. Its hard for me to let her go! Shes like
a little wild sister to me. But Im glad shell be in safety! I love you Shayan!
Good night.
and will no longer stay in school. I do not know how I can explain that to
my foster parents and anyways I dont want to attend any other school.
No one heard me or wanted to hear me. I have expressed my opinion
and my desire repeatedly to anyone, but why was I not heard? The judge did
not want to listen to me when I was consulted. Also the Jugendamt and the
legal adviser had no ear for me.
Then as a last hope I have written a letter to the Chancellor Merkel,
with the hope that she would respond to me. The letter remained unanswered until this day.
I can live here no longer, if I am not heard! I do not see that someone
who says that he saves me and then he does not hear me at times. And no
one is interested in my desires! I was a free person and now I am tied up...
and forced to attend a school where I need to waste my time!
I was protected by my parents and cared for, now I am thrown in a pile
of broken glass and any protection is torn from me.
I am supposed to see the world...and my range is as small as never before. For six weeks I go to Ansbach every morning and back in the evening.
I was promised freedom but I am led into a prison! I always felt like a free,
young lion. And now I am to follow some people, who do not have a personal interest in me, into the zoo?
And there I should be free in my 2 meter diameter room, to go around
in circles? I am going there merely to be exploited, like everyone else in
this circus! It is envy that leads people to do such things! I have no more
strength to fight in the cage, and maybe it helps Jonathan ultimately more
if I do the first step, that he will also come out faster. I think to myself that
if we were to start from scratch, then we would know how to act and no one
would have a chance to bring us back.
Maybe they would even wake up and realize how crazy they are two
girls picked up against their will by 100 police officers! Well, unfortunately,
this is all just a dream. In reality I am so weak and small and my enemies are
so big and strong. But if God wills it, he will allow us to run away at least.
Merea wants to come with me. I said to her that she must run from
her school to the train station, rather than take the bus to go home. Then
she would have to board the next train that stops. Actually we had already
planned to run away for weeks, and Merea asked me every day when we
would finally do it. I put it off again and again because of Jonathan. I had to
cry every time I thought about leaving him. When I told my father what we
were doing, he was upset and told us that we should not do it.
24
It could also be dangerous. Six weeks have passed since we were separated from our parents against our will. The judge herself has said that there
is no end is in sight! We decided that today is the day we can finally escape.
Merea and I made our last plans. It took a long time to get Jonathan to sleep.
He slept very restlessly and woke up very early in the morning. I felt
bad, but I wanted to do it. Shortly thereafter, I had to go to school. I had
planned to spend the whole morning sick and then be excused. From there
I could go to Dombhl and continue with Merea on the train. Our goal was
to arrive in Switzerland before nightfall.
When I arrived in Dombhl, I bought tickets for both of us and waited
for Merea. Our train left at 1:24 p.m. Mereas school ended at 1:05 and I
hoped that she would make it because it was a longer route to the station.
When Merea saw me from a distance, she began to run. She was so happy
and excited to run away that we finally made it to escape.
When we boarded the train and it started to depart, we felt liberated.
We never wanted to go back. It seemed like it took forever by the time we
arrived at the next station. From there, we took the train to Zurich, Switzerland. My little sister was very impatient in the train and every time we
stopped, she asked when do we get
out. The day had been very long
but finally we got off the train.
We had arrived in Switzerland safely! That was our goal,
because we are Swiss citizens and
here we want to continue to feel
safe. We hope to be heard by the
authorities here and hopefully be
allowed to always stay with our
parents.
25
the restroom so urgently. Merea too. We wanted to hug our parents but they
didnt let us. We went weeping to use the toilets. When we came back we all of
a sudden just pulled ourselves out of their claws and ran to our parents. After
a while of discussion we were forced to go with the German police and our
parents could follow to the police station. We sat in the police station hallway
for 5 hours with my parents. Then the Youth Department came.
Herr Singer, Herr Ziegler, Frau Kundinger and two other women. My
parents went to talk with them. We were praying that our Father makes a
miracle and lets us go home, but no! My parents both came back crying. I
thought, I wished we could all just die! I screamed at the police and said,
Are you here to protect and save people, or are you here to deliver us to
these wicked enemies?
The police man didnt answer. I said, This is abuse. I never experienced
such abuse! We ran away from them. We ran for our lives and now you are
handing us over to them again?!? We will die!!! One police man came over
to me and told me I should stop. I would make it worse for Merea if I expressed more feelings. He wanted me to promise that I be quiet. I said, Ill
be quiet if he promised me first that we wouldnt be separated.
He agreed and went to talk to the Youth Department. He came back
and wasnt able to promise anything, so I kept on preaching to them and
yelling around and crying, and saying that they were the biggest children
abusers on earth ever. He told me to be quiet but I said that I wasnt because
he didnt give me his promise. Some policemen got some seelsorge person
(soul caretakers preacher) from the Rot Kreuz (Swiss Red Cross) to talk
to me. They thought I turned crazy. I yelled at him to not talk to me and
that I was totally normal and was using my brain and that I wasnt at all
crazy, but if he wanted to know why I was acting like that I would tell him.
I said, They are abusing us! They are taking us away from our parents and
separating us on top of it all.
Wicked Frau Kundinger grabbed Merea and started walking away with
her. I dont even know whether or not Merea was able to kiss my parents good
bye. I quickly hugged my parents and ran behind Merea. I held her tight.
Merea screamed to let her come with me. They pulled me away from her.
The last thing I heard of her was: But promise that I can sleep with my sister
tonight. Please! and then I just heard loud cries. Policemen commanding her
to be quiet and cold answers from Frau Kundinger and Herr Singer.
We drove for four hours and arrived in a village at 2 oclock in the
morning. I asked, Where is Merea? Tell me. I wont do anything before
you tell me.
27
But they just answered, She is in the other car. It was raining and
super cold outside and I had hardly anything to wear, so I followed into the
house. I didnt say a word. They asked if I had a phone.
I said, No.
Herr Singer said that he thinks I do.
I said, No.
The lady that received us asked if she could look through my bag.
I said, No.
So they came to the conclusion that I have one and they will look into
my bag.
I said, No! and that the woman can look herself through my bag
without you all, because I hate you for what you do and are.
Herr Singer mockingly said, OK. Eva never lies. You can trust her that
she will show you her bag after.
When they left, he wanted to shake my hand. I looked him in the eyes
and said, I wont shake the hand of a wicked man like you!
He mockingly answered, Oh, I expected that.
As soon as they left, I put my cellphone on the table, threw my head
into my hands and cried. The woman showed me where my cellphone would
be kept and a little bit of the house. She told me that I was in a home with
7 other girls and there are more homes in this village. I saw my room, she
gave me a toothbrush and toothpaste, and some towels. I didnt want to fall
asleep. I know, Merea must have either arrived now or is still on the road
somewhere. At 3:00 clock she was still on the road they said. I know Merea
didnt sleep in the car. She told me before she left that she will not be able to
sleep and she is scared to sleep because she is scared of what they do to her.
To me this is real bad child abuse. To do something so bad to a child in the
middle of the night.
She has a sick sister the age of Merea, and she is scared for her, because
she could die any moment if her liver stops working. I felt much compassion for her. I told her my story too. We were both crying, just wanting to
go home. We started a huge puzzle together with 3000 pieces. We both feel
we dont fit into the puzzle of this world. She said she doesnt fit anywhere
and so they stick her in a home for people that dont fit. It made me so sad
because I have somewhere to fit, but they dont let me fit there.
Tonight we had a birthday party for one of the girls. It was fun. At one
point the phone rang, and the teacher answered. She came back and said
to the other girl, Hey, we forgot to call your mom. She was so worried
about you...
I said, My mother is worrying about me too. She doesnt even know
if Im still alive and she doesnt even know whether I have a bed and food.
She is probably dying of fear and sorrow and I can not even tell her that Im
fine. Then I ran to my room.
I couldnt hold the tears back longer. All those thoughts overwhelmed
me, about my parents and Merea I am still so helpless, so powerless. I
was getting ready for bed. I took a shower. But the girl I was talking to earlier came to ask me to continue on the puzzle with her. So I went. Maybe I
shouldnt think too much about my situation and think more about how to
encourage her and be a friend.
By the way, today I went shopping with Fee. Because I dont have any
clothes with me. We got some clothes to change, while the other ones are
washing and a jacket.
of days. I wrote a letter to abba and imma and hope to be able to send it to
Wernitz by mail. Now I need to rewrite my whole nice letter for Merea,
cause I wrote in English accidentally.
gave me a little horse of fabric to comfort me and to take with me. The bell
is ringing, Jule opens, I hear his name. I want to jump under the table. I stay
sitting. Jule brings him in...
She calls Britta to come because, Herr S ah. Oh, was is da!!?! That
makes Singer kind of nervous. He looks all around and behaves kind of
scared. I shake his hand (half-heartedly) because Britta told me to. Britta
takes him into the office to talk. He left my bags in the entrance. I grab them
and bring them to my room. Im super nervous. Ill check my things after.
I still want to die. When I come back to the dining room all the girls are
crowded, talking about how gross and strange he is. Its my turn now. Singer
asks me how Im doing, and I tell him BAD, but I smile, to suppress tears.
He asked me why I was saying bad and smiling. I told him, that I was
suppressing my tears. He told me that Merea is in a foster family with other
children and that she asked to be with Ishshah Schott. I told him that she
needs somebody that she knows already so she doesnt turn crazy. I told him
again that I dont regret the step I made to take off with her, cause at least
she had her abba and imma for 3 weeks, and that was worth it, because we
would obviously still not be home yet. He told me, that on the other hand I
wouldnt be separated from Merea if I wouldnt have done that. I told him
that that it was totally senseless to get us again and it should be obvious to
him by now that we love our parents and theres no abuse and no reason for
us to be taken away.
He plainly answered that if we would not have been registered in KLZ,
we would not have needed to leave our parents and that basically its their
own fault. I was totally perplexed and shocked I just stared at him with
my brain, racing with words to tell him, but nothing came out of me. I just
stared and thought that it is time for that man to wake up. Back to the Nazis
Just because you are registered in the house of a Jew, no matter what you
really are, you get killed or whatever.
The worst was that he actually repeated it a couple of times in our conversation. He would just say it over and over again, as if he didnt believe me
that we really havent lived there for a long time. I told him that we arent
Gypsies and we need to be registered somewhere and that Im not at all
ashamed of it. He told me that he cant imagine abba and imma to register
anywhere else but KLZ or Wrnitz. I hated the way he was saying it, so I always said, Really? Im not so sure about that. It for sure was not at all their
plans lately, because we wanted to stay where we were, but maybe they have
no other choice now.
I just hope so badly that it will be in Ansbach, because they promised
to me, that I only need to be gone because I decided to be with my sister. I
31
didnt tell him anything about that. I kind of had a black out, but after all
it might have been good, because it would have arrived anyways. He just
let everything bounce off his ears again. In the end, I gave him a letter for
Merea. He asked to see my room. I told him that he doesnt have any need to
see it and there are plenty of nice people that can see it. He also asked Britta
to go through my bags with her before I got them, but my bags were already
in the room and before Britta could allow him to, I answered, NO! She
can look through them with me, dont worry. Finally he was gone. Britta
watched me unpack my shoes out of one bag, then she said, she doesnt want
to get mixed in with my things and let me unpack my other bag by myself.
I felt like you need me to be a stone to a stone. If Id be super honest
with Singer, he could misuse everything I say.
I dont ever want to enter a church again. Just to be alone, I dont want
to be so sad. I want to be with my friends. Its so terrible to be alone. In the
car the music was so depressing. I think its me singing, but I guess thats
just how everybody feels in the world. ... So alone and dead... Plastic world
with dead plastic smiles. They dont act like it though. They always cover up,
they dont even imagine anything else. They cant even imagine what real
life is like. All I can hang on to is that I have a place to belong and I need to
fight for it until I and the other children have it back!
was going to let us be taken captive now. Why do we need to be out here?
Just to get more and more defiled? I mean the little ones too. Its not what
we were born for! I think our Master is powerful to save, and if not happens??? Does He want our enemies to make fun of Him? Im senseless! My
life is dead. I cant think straight anymore. Is this real?
I can only think of Merea. She cant withstand everything. She is feeling
100 times worse. Shes a child and needs even more care and attention. They
are probably giving her pills. Im soooooo scared for her. They could be
putting stuff into her food if she was not taking pills or be stuffing her with
chocolate. I know that she is doing bad! When I tell the Youth Department,
they dont even say anything to it. They basically say that Im right. They
know that they are killing lives, messing up futures, and damaging souls.
Im so mad. Im being so brainwashed out here and Im about to snap. No,
Im not! Im fighting to be normal.
The main kitchen helps me be normal. I can work with people that have
a bit more common sense. We do normal work and also have normal talk.
Kitchen is totally real life, not crazy youth or retarded professionals. I want
to go home. It will be hard to come back in a way, because we will all be so
different. We will need to come back together and get totally renewed. We
will be so messed up and come back to total surrender and have a clean
conscience. The children need to get loved It will be a challenge. We need
to come straight into the fire. When I come home, I dont want to be treated
like anything strange or special and when I have bad words in my mouth I
want to get rid of them. Tonight they watched a Movie on RTL II about spirits. It was so disgusting and filthy. I said I was too tired. I almost fell asleep
on the couch, because I wasnt watching, but I didnt want to sleep listening
to that ugly story. I hate it. I miss home so badly. I think, the worst for my
little sister, is if she needs to go to bed, scared. I want her to always have
peace and not need to suffer under terrible fears.
I was mad that the Youth Department never told me about that. All
along I had terrible fears for her, when I actually could have been more
relieved. I for sure dont hope this will be forever, but its better than having
her be alone in a foster family. Im happy for what the day tomorrow will
bring.
On November 28, 2013 Eva Krumbacher (Havah) is free at last!
Her parents received the
decision of the district court
that the loss of custody of
their daughter was repealed.
She was picked up at the
facility in which she was
held since her return from
Switzerland. Havahs
younger sister Merea
remained in the custody of
the Youth Department along
with appoximately 30 others
of her friends and classmates from the Twelve Tribes Communities
in Germany. Havahs letter to German Chancellor Angela Merkel
remains unanswered.
38
39
The Rod
The rod is a thin, flexible branch that stings if you get it on the bottom.
It could only injure if one would furiously swing it, and that only happens
when you do not correct in due time that is, if you wait until youve had
enough of this! and are full of rage and anger. The Word of God calls such
behavior hating his child.
To love ones child means: as soon as he is disobedient, take the child to
his room where you can take care of him undisturbed and in peace. In the
film, that peace was misunderstood and condemned as emotionless and
cold. You could also have considered that peace as positive, as it really is.
Emotionless, yes without the emotions of anger and wrath. According to
the sect commissioner in the film, Everyones hand slips at one point or another with emotions, anger, and afterwards you will have to apologize for
40
who remain in the Twelve Tribes. Both are true! But the dropouts have their
experience solely due to the choices of their parents, not the Community.
Unfortunately, the youth welfare office and district court have not taken
this possibility into consideration, otherwise they would have dealt differently with us. The medical officer had indeed just recently found that there
were no signs of physical or mental violence against our children.
Propaganda
In the film you can see how the punishment part of the education takes
place. But for the sake of propaganda, the most important part of the whole
was intentionally cut away: the reconciliation, the encouragement, the embrace, the restoration of the mother-child relationship, where no feelings of
separation remain all the little ingredients that cause a child to grow into
a confident adult. If any ingredients are missing, the fruit will be different.
42
Dear Judge
Believe me, if I did not have my faith, my childs education would look
quite different. If I have to change my way of parenting, my faith must first
be changed, because it is the Word of God, dictating to me how I should
raise my children! If the nation of Germany does not protect religious freedom, then my faith is useless here. It is the practice of religion that matters
the works, not simply the mental belief. That is not faith at all.
What does it profit, my brethren, if someone says he has faith but it
does not have works? Can such faith save him? (James 2:14)
So also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead. But someone will
say, You have faith and I have works. Show me your faith apart from
your works, and I will show you my faith by my works. (James 2:17-18)
The
T H E R E I S A P E O P L E who woke up this morning with one thing on their minds to love their
Creator with all their heart, mind, and strength, and to love one another just as He loved them. Being
just ordinary human beings, we are far from perfect in our love, yet, in hope, we persevere. Our goal?
That the kingdom of God would come on earth as it is in heaven, so that love and justice can rule on the
earth. Sound impossible? It would be, were it not that the Son of God came to earth to redeem mankind,
to set us free from the curse of sin, and to enable us to love. Because we have come to see His worth and
our own desperate need, we have surrendered everything in order to follow Him. Our hearts and our
homes are open night and day to any who are interested in our life or are weary of their sin and want to
know the purpose for which they were created.
nEW YORK
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