American Atheists Essential Reading List

Enjoy the introductory information provided in these books, which are of topics of interests to Atheists. These titles represent only
a fraction of the books available from American Atheist Press, yet collectively they provide a broad overview of Atheist thought.

PAGES

STYLE

Atheism Advanced: Further Thoughts of a Free Thinker by David Eller

An anthropologist advances Atheists and
Atheism beyond bel_ie_f_!
_

STOCK#
16010

$22.00

490

Paperback

Christianity before Christ by John G. Jackson

Christian doctrines are traced to their
origins in older religions.

5200

$14.00

237

Paperback

The Case Against Religion by Albert Ellis

A psychotherapist's view of the harmful
aspects of religious belief.

5096

$6.00

57

Stapled

Living in the Light by Anne R. Stone

Subtitled "Freeing Your Child from the Dark Ages"
This book serves as a manual for Atheist parents.

5588

$12.00

157

Paperback

Our Constitution: The Way It Was by Madalyn O'Hair

American Atheist Radio Series episodes about the myth
that our founding fathers created a Christian nation.

5400

$6.00

70

Stapled

What on Earth is an Atheist! by Madalyn O'Hair

American Atheist Radio Series episodes on various topics
of Atheist philosophy and history.

5412

$18.00

288

Paperback

The Bible Handbook by G. W Foote, W P Ball, et al.

A compilation of biblical absurdities, contradictions,
atrocities, immoralities and obscenities.

5008

$17.00

372

Paperback

An Atheist Epic by Madalyn O'Hair

The personal story of the battle to end mandatory prayer
and bible recitation in schools in the United States.

5376

$18.00

302

Paperback

65 Press Interviews by Robert G. Ingersoll

Ingersoll's 19th-century newspaper interviews
as a Freethinker and opponent of superstition.

5589

$15.00

262

Paperback

An Atheist Looks at Women & Religion by Madalyn O'Hair

Why attempts to reconcile religion with civil
rights for women are self-defeatin~:

5419

$10.00

42

Paperback

The Jesus the Jews Never Knew by Frank R. Zindler

A search of ancient Jewish literature yields no evidence
for the existence of any historical Jesus.

7026

$20.00

544

Paperback

The Great Infidels by Robert G. Ingersoll

How nonbelievers and Atheists have contributed
to civilization and enriched our lives.

5197

$7.00

80

Paperback

The Myth of Nazareth: The Invented Town of Jesus by Rene Salm

Jesus couldn't have come from Nazareth
because no one was living there at the time.

16014

$20.00

401

Paperback

Illustrated Stories From The Bible by Paul Farrell

You can bet this book won't ever be used
In Sunday Schools!

16000

$16.00

172

Paperback

Jesus is Dead by Robert M. Price

Not only is there no reason to believe Jesus rose from the
dead, there is no reason to think he ever lived or died at all!

16005

$18.00

291

Paperback

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PRICE

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Please see the order form enclosed with this magazine for member discounts and shipping details, or consult www.atheists.org.

July/August 2009

AMERICAN ATHEIST

Vol 47, No.6

CONTENTS

ISSN 0516-9623
ISSN 1935-8369
AMERICAN

From the President

Ed Buckner, PhD

Book Review
Bill Hampl

Condoms & the Pope

Janet Brazill

10

Evolve: Politicians Lag Behind

Jim Haught

12

The Closet Atheist

David Smalley

14

The Christ-Myth
Frank R. Zindler

20

Blogosphere Beats Peer Review

Massimo Pigliucci

22

Confessions of a Childhood Atheist

Gale E. Christianson

28

The Problem with the Contingency Argument

Shane Lambert

30

A Born Again Atheist

Gosta Werner Iwasiuk

32

Religion 101: Final Exam (Part 1)

Terrence Kaye

(Print)
(Online)

ATHEIST

PRESS

Managing Editor
Frank R. Zindler
editor@atheists.org

'A Journal

AMERICAN
ATHEIST
of Atheist News and Thought'

General Editor
Bill Hampl
editor@americanatheist.org
Design & Layout Editor
David Smalley
dsmalley@atheists.org
Cover Design
David Smalley
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Theory

FROM THE

Ed Buckner, PhD
President of
American Atheists

PRESIDENT
Naming Two New Leaders

merican Atheists President Ed Buckner announced

that the Board of Directors has recently approved
the appointment of two new leaders for the
organization: Kathleen Johnson as Vice President for
the Western United States and David Silverman as Vice
President for the Eastern United States. Both Silverman
and Johnson are already members of the board of directors
and active leaders of the organization, but their elevation
and new titles are expected to help the organization put
emphasis on vigorous new ideas, fresh approaches, and
broadened leadership for the group.
Buckner said, "I'm delight to be able to share crucial
leadership roles with such powerful and appealing young
activists. Silverman has served admirably-and
will
continue to serve-as
our National Spokesperson and
Communications Director, while Johnson has a distinguished
career in military law enforcement and investigation and
has long led efforts to educate Americans about the major
contributions of Atheists in the military." He added that
both are effective, engaging speakers who will represent
American Atheists well, whether in the media, in debates,
or one-on-one with Atheists or others.
More about each:
David Silverman has been an AA member since 1996,
was New Jersey State Director for four years (State Director
of the year, 1998), and was Activist of the Year in 1999. He
organized the first-ever Atheist protest at the Republican
National Convention in 200 1and originated the post of Youth
and Family Director, which now offers three scholarships,
and the Nogodblog, which gets 15,000 visits per day. On
behalf of AA, he has appeared on many television and radio
shows, such as Hannity and Colmes, The O'Reilly Factor,
Scarborough Country, Its Your Call, Fox and Friends,
Nick News, and on CNN, CNBC, MSNBC, and WWOR.
He has been featured in a political ad for a U. S. Senatorial
candidate. He was written dozens of articles on-line and for
American Atheist magazine, including 'Coming Out,' 'Top
10 Atheist Myths,' and an interview with Douglas Adams
that was published after Adams's death in The Salmon of

AMERICAN

ATHEIST-JULY/AUGUST

2009

Doubt and referenced in Richard Dawkins's book, The God

Delusion. He was named as Atheist of the Year 2008; in
2009, he was appointed as American Atheists Vice President
for the Eastern United States.
First Sergeant (Retired) Kathleen Johnson, a retired
member of the U. S. Army and a lifelong Atheist, began
her career as an Atheists' rights activist in 1996 when she
found an issue of American Atheist magazine in a library.
After joining American Atheists and becoming an active
participant in Atheist causes, she searched without success
for an Atheist organization that catered specifically to the
unique needs of military personnel. In response to this
need, she founded the Military Association of Atheists and
Freethinkers (MAAF) and served as the organization's first
president. In 2001, she relinquished the organization's reins
to her successor in order to increase her activities as Military
Director for American Atheists. In 2008, she was nominated
to the American Atheists' board of directors; in 2009, she
was appointed as American Atheists Vice President for
the Western United States. Her activities have included
numerous speaking engagements, media interviews, public
appearances, and participation as a guest speaker in the first
Godless Americans March on Washington. She continues to
serve her country as a civilian employee of the U. S. Army.

www .atheists .org

dress your car

starting at $2

at atheists.orq/store
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For Adults
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No Special Rights

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FIRST TIME.

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- AMERICAN ATHEIST

wondering

BOOK REVIEW: BY BILL HAMPL

whether

or

not the Chronicles

are

suitable reading material

The Magician

s Book: A Skeptic s Adventures

by Laura Miller

in Narnia

for children. Poignantly,

Miller

details her adult

realization

of

the

lion

Aslan as a Christ-figure:

"Of

aura Mille.r's beautiful ~iece of criticism notes

the

self-

that ever smce a young girl she has had a special

sacrifice of Aslan to compensate for the treachery of Edmund

appreciation

was exactly like the crucifixion of Christ to payoff the sins

of C.S. Lewis's

Narnia chronicles,

perhaps the most familiar of which is The Lion, the Witch,

of mankind! How could I have missed that? I felt angry and

and the Wardrobe. As noted in Miller's introduction, she

humiliated because I had been fooled" (6). As a child, Miller

eventually broke from the Chronicles when she discovered

adored Aslan; as an adult, Miller accepts Lewis's symbolism

their religious themes: "My relationship to Narnia would turn

but confides that some of the thrill of reading the Chronicles

out to be as rocky as any love affair, a story of enchantment,

is gone: "Although as a girl I adored Aslan, he is another

betrayal, estrangement, and reunion ... [W]hen I discovered

part of the Chronicles that no longer moves me as it once

some of the more obvious 'secret' meanings in C. S. Lewis's

did" (33). Simply put, adults note symbolism more readily

children's books, I felt tricked, and for a long time I avoided

than do children. As a woman, Miller detects "all too clearly,

even thinking about Narnia"

Book

the theological strings and levers behind Lewis's stagecraft;

represents her coming to terms, as an adult reader, with the

the great lion seems less a character than a creaking device"

Chronicles.

(33).

(3). The Magician's

One intriguing area that Miller considers is her biography

Still, Miller notes adults' astonishment that children do

of Lewis, notably as a flesh-and-blood man. She relays that

not detect Lewis's symbolism. She notes, "Adults marvel

before Lewis's marriage to Joy Gresham, Lewis had an

that this subtext [of religious symbolism],

unconventional

with Janie Moore, a woman

obvious to us, is invisible to children" (87). She notes that to

twenty years his senior and married, though permanently

the educated adult reader, "Aslan is obviously an analog of

estranged from her husband. She was also an Atheist (135).

Christ," but to a newer reader, "Aslan cannot be Jesus because

Although Lewis eventually called Moore "Mother," "most"

Jesus is a bearded man in sandals and robe, while Aslan is a

of the biographers concur that the relationship began as a

lion" (88). Younger readers are more literal-minded than are

romantic affair" (135). Information such as this helps the

adult readers. Thus, these younger readers are likely to miss

reader to better understand the historical person C. S. Lewis,

most ifnot all of Lewis's religious symbolism.

relationship

especially within the historical context that Miller provides.

course,

so glaringly

Again, although the Chronicles are rife with religious

Miller also notes some of the stranger members in Lewis's

overtones, Lewis's Chronicles failed to convert Miller to

fan-base: "There is a tiny contingent

who, for religious

Christianity. Describing herself, Miller explains, "What I am

reasons, prefer to think that Lewis remained a virgin until he

not, however, is a Christian; for all the countless times I have

married, and an even tinier contingent who like to think he

reread Lewis 's books, they have never succeeded in converting

never consummated his love for Joy, whose divorce was not

me" (8). Miller notes that one reason for this failure is that

officially recognized by the Church of England" (135-36).

she already held a negative opinion of Christianity, which

This minority's insistence on the celibacy of their literary

she found "too monolithic, comprehensive, and established"

hero is just one of the oddities that Miller uncovers.

(100). And though she was later able to once again find

Besides the sections on the life of C. S. Lewis, some of

pleasure in Lewis's works, the texts never conquered her

the strongest sections of The Magician's Book examine the

reservations: "However much I may have been shaped by the

differences between what it means to read as a child versus to

Chronicles, I've remained impervious to the one ideology

read as an adult. These sections would interest Atheist parents

their author deliberately tried to instill in me: Christianity"

AMERICAN

ATHEIST

JULy/AUGUST

2009

(172). The ideologies of the Chronicles bounces harmlessly

accompanies

Christianity: "The first time I encountered a

off her.

truly gruesome image of the bloodied, tortured Christ was

Miller's analysis of what religion in general, Christianity

at the local art museum, where a Spanish painting of Jesus

in particular, 'means' is particularly fascinating to an Atheist

with rolling eyes, crown of thoms, and gore dripping down

audience. She posits whether religion is a set of beliefs or

his face so terrified me I was afraid to venture back into

else a displayable skill set of actions, "whether the stained-

the building for years" (93). This, or course, is one of the

glass and Sunday school associations aren't as much a part

ironies of Christianity: while trying to scare its believers into

of Christianity as the mystical Resurrection of Christ, even

obedience, it instead scares them away from the church.

ifthey aren't supposed to be as important a part. Is a religion

Revolting against the rigidity and violence, Miller notes

a great story about the meaning

how she came into her own.

of life or a daily practice, or its

Miller writes, "As soon as I

it perhaps

acquired any independence

something

else-a

of

collection of icons? Although,

thought, I drifted away from

doctrinally speaking, accepting

the Church and what I saw

Jesus Christ as one's lord and

as

savior is the key act of Christian

conversion,

many

Christians

seem to believe that going to

church and abiding by a list of
detailed restrictions are just as
important"

(90).

For

Miller,

Magicians
Book

are one of two major turn-offs of

Christianity.

A SltBPTIC~

DVE~TURE'
in

She notes, "Most

proscriptions

and requirements,

the

such lists of detailed restrictions

its endless

its guilt-

mongering and tedious rituals"

(6).
is

Especially
Miller's

between

interesting

strong

worship

masochism:

analogy
and sado-

"Religions

have

been known to demand great

suffering from their adherents,
ordeals ranging

from fasting

of the things required of me by

and other forms of self-denial

my religion . . . persuaded me

to self-flagellation

that unhappiness

shirts to outright martyrdom.

was next to

and

hair

godliness and that virtue was

Remove

consolidated by suffering" (93).

and

Reading the Chronicles brought

Miller joy, an emotion she did

and the emotional

not associate with her religious

helplessness

upbringing.

Miller

isn't so very different from the

"Christianity

instructed

explains:

the overt

sexuality

the paraphernalia
sadomasochistic

from
scene,

center of

and dependency

me to

intense bond between parent

comply with a list of dreary,

and child or between a god and

legalistic demands because Jesus, whom I had never met,

his worshipper" (167). In other words, a person's worshiping

reportedly loved me and had redeemed me from the guilt of

a deity raises questions about the emotional needs that such

a sin I had never committed by dying before I was ever born.

worshiping fills for the believer.

The proof of his love was his suffering; lowed

him, and

In closing, can an Atheist find pleasure in the Chronicles,

he expected to be paid in kind. Narnia and Asian made me

with their Christian symbols and religious proselytizing?

happy. Jesus wanted me to be miserable" (95-96).

For Miller, the answer is 'yes.' The beauty and joyfulness of

Perhaps even more troubling than the misery of the

detailed restrictions of Christianity is the second turn-off:

Lewis's imaginative prose negate the religious symbolism of

the Chronicles. The book is availlable at amazon.com.

ritualized violence. Miller catalogues the gore that often

JULy/AUGUST

2009

. AMERICAN

ATHEIST

Condoms and the Pope

By Janet Brazill

action of the world community proves that the

officials and politicians in a number of countries. An article

antiquated views of medieval potentates have no

in the British medical journal The Lancet accused the pope

elevance for modem society. The recent remarks

of having "distorted scientific evidence to promote Catholic

of Pope Benedict XVI-that

risk "aggravating"

the use of condoms would

the problem

of AIDS-have

stirred

London's

Guardian

stated

that

several

foreign

worldwide resentment. The Pope believes that addressing

governments also criticized the Vatican, which is a "rare"

the disease will require a "spiritual and human awakening"

occurrence that "reflects the strength of feeling against the

and "friendship for those who suffer."

pope's comments." A spokesperson for the French foreign

His remarks, uttered while flying to Cameroon as part

ministry said, "France voices extremely sharp concern over

of a seven-day tour of Africa, alarmed many around the

the consequences of Benedict XVI's comments." He added,

world. Michel Kazatchkine-head

"While it is not up to us to pass judgment on church doctrine,

of the Global Fund To

for the pope

we consider that such comments are a threat to public health

statement, which he called "a

policies and the duty to protect human life." Former French

denial of the epidemic." According to Kazatchkine, for the

Prime Minister Alain Juppe went as far as saying that

pope "to make these remarks on a continent that unfortunately

Benedict seemed to be "living in a situation of total autism."

Fight AIDS, Tuberculosis and Malaria-called

to retract his "unacceptable"

is a continent where 70% of people who have AIDS die, it's

The

German

Health

Minister

and

Minister

of

Development issued a joint statement criticizing the pope's

absolutely unbelievable."
in

remarks. "Condoms save lives," they said, adding, "Modem

editorials in the New York Times, the Washington Post, and

assistance to the developing world today must make access

many other publications and a storm of criticism by health

to family planning available to the poorest of the poor,

The comments led to unprecedented condemnations

doctrine. "

AMERICAN

ATHEIST . JULy/AUGUST

2009

especially the use of condoms. Anything else would be

with it. But as it entails dealing with alternative lifestyles-

irresponsible" (Butt/Hooper, Guardian, 3/19).

particularly homosexuality-sex

Spain also weighed in, promising

to send a million

outside of marriage, drug

use, etc., it becomes something the church cannot possibly

deal with until they have first dealt with these core issues."

condoms to Africa to fight the spread of AIDS.

By far, the strongest reaction was in Belgium, where the

The influence

of this outdated

monarch

has been

parliament passed a resolution condemning Pope Benedict

devastating. His Vatican has wielded worldwide influence

for saying that the use of condoms could worsen the spread

through the United Nations, where, as the Holy See, it enjoys

of AIDS. It called on the Belgian envoy to the Vatican to

enormous advantage over any other religion by operating as

lodge a protest over the pontiff's "unacceptable" comments.

a Non-member State Permanent Observer. This designation

It was the first time a country has ordered a diplomatic protest

gives it some of the privileges of a state, such as being able

against the Vatican and brought the controversy to the brink

to speak and vote at UN conferences. Because these operate

of a diplomatic incident between two sovereign states.

on consensus,

The Vatican has defended the pope's words, saying he

was "maintaining the position of his predecessors."

Indeed,

the ability to disagree with the majority

consensus has significant power. The Vatican delegations to

all of the major humanitarian

meetings of the 1990s-the

he was. With all the pomp and circumstance of royalty, this

International

Vatican ruler pontificates dogma based on long-standing

(ICPD), the Fourth World Conference on Women (FWCW),

tradition rather than modem

and the five-year

scientific fact. Despite the

Conference on Population
follow

and Development

up meeting

to the ICPD-

tragic enormity of the problem, he reiterates his Church's

unequivocally condemned the use of condoms to prevent the

position that the spread of HIV and Aids in Africa should

spread of HIV/AIDS. The delegation to the FWCW stated:

be contained through fidelity and abstinence and not by

"The Holy See in no way endorses contraception or the use

condoms. In his arcane thinking, he sees spiritual purity as

of condoms, either as a family planning measure or in HIV I

the primary weapon against this devastating disease.

AIDS prevention programs."

Theologian Daniel C. Maguire looks at it differently.

Such stubborn adherence to traditional doctrine against

In his book, Vaticanology, he writes: "The current Roman

birth control

Catholic theology is one that favors death rather than life.

problem, complicating efforts to combat global warming.

[The Vatican's]

'better-dead-than-condom[-]ed'

position

has increased

the world's

overpopulation

These latest comments of Pope Benedict XVI follow a

has not been blessed by any of the world's religions or by

recent uproar over the lifting of an excommunication

common sense. It is flat-earth embarrassing."

British bishop who denied the extent of the Holocaust. The

Is the pope's empire, then, beginning to crumble? Besides

rebuke from world leaders and theologians,
in his Court-the

Church hierarchy itself-are

the nobles
rebelling.

Despite the Vatican's complete refusal to consider a change

in policy regarding condoms for HIV IAIDS prevention,

on a

pope has also courted controversy with previous comments

on homosexuality

and Islam. All this is causing growing

apprehension within the Vatican over his leadership after one

insider labeled his gaffe-prone reign a disaster.
Perhaps this latest 'gaffe'

will show the world that

bishops' conferences around the world have suggested that

medieval kingdoms are irrelevant in the 21 st Century. The

condom use may be acceptable in some circumstances

to

pope's outdated realm of robes, incense and ritual confine

prevent AIDS. The pope needs to realize that without proper,

him to a way of thinking that is out of touch with modem

effective treatment, the course of this disease will decimate

life. His archaic doctrines should be relegated to the dustbin

the number of serfs in his kingdom.

of history and nations should stop according him a voice in

But can a Pontiff, dedicated to celibacy, ever truly

matters of policy.

understand the real world? As John White, a priest who

left the church after disclosing his HIV status, said of the
church's response to AIDS: "The core of all the problems

Janet Brazill is a retired computer systems analyst, now

around HIV IAIDS is being unable to deal adequately with

engaged

sexuality. If AIDS were merely an infectious disease, then

Colorado Springs.

in social and political

activism.

She lives in

there would be little difficulty for the church in dealing

JULy/AUGUST 2009

- AMERICAN ATHEIST

By Jim Haught

Politicians Lag Behind

M

illions of American schoolchildren visit the

Smithsonian's
natural
history
museum
in
Washington, where they see elaborate scientific
displays about biological evolution that has been occurring
for hundreds of millions of years on Earth. The exhibits show
that dinosaurs existed for 160 million years, a thousand times
longer than humans. The earliest fossils in the Smithsonian
are stromatolites, domes of hardened minerals formed nearly
3 billion years ago when blue-green algae trapped particles
in shallow water.
Yet these same children return to local school systems
where evolution can be taboo, and some fundamentalist

10

AMERICAN

ATHEIST

- JULY / AUGUST

2009

officials repeatedly try to force science teachers to assert that

the planet was created recently, as described in Genesis.
Time after time, courts scuttle attempts to insert scripture
into science courses, but the effort always revives. Last week,
it resurfaced in Texas, where some state leaders wanted high
school biology classes to debate 'strengths and weaknesses'
of different explanations of Earth's existence-a
way to
bring 'God' into science discussion. The Washington Post
commented:
"Those are supportive buzzwords for people who doubt
evolution and want creationism taught in the classroom ....
The force behind restoring the 'strengths and weaknesses'

language, which was stripped from the science standards

in January after two decades, is Don McLeroy. He's the
chairman of the State Board of Education. He is also a
'young earth creationist' who believes the Earth was created
by God no more than 10,000 years ago. Never mind plenty
of scientific evidence that the planet has been around for a
few billion years."
Four years ago, a federal judge in Pennsylvania
declared that teaching 'Intelligent Design' in public schools
violates America's separation of church and state because
ID is merely a disguise for divine creation. Nonetheless,
evangelical legislators in various states, mostly in the Deep
South or less-educated rural regions, still introduce bills
requiring science teachers to allow 'critical analysis' or 'a
full range of scientific views,' to turn classes into religious
forums. Louisiana recently passed an 'academic freedom'

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law to let fundamentalist teachers preach their church beliefs

in class.
Friday afternoon, the Texas board failed to require
'strengths and weaknesses' debate, but fundamentalist
members managed to insert other language designed to turn
science classes into theological battlegrounds. Meanwhile,
some evangelical Florida legislators introduced a mill to
spur similar religious quarrels when evolution is taught.
Heaven help us. Ever since the famed Scopes Monkey
Trial in the 1920s, attempts to sabotage science instruction
haven't ceased. We agree with the Post, which concluded:
"Texans, like everyone else, are free to believe what they
want, hut in science class, they should teach science."

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Lynne Wright, TX - $100
Pamella Stem, WI - $50
Mark Marquisee, DE - $50
Robert Bruno, MN - $50
John Carver, PhD, GA - $125
Wayne Ward,AL- $100

American Atheists thanks the following persons for their generous contributions to our cause.

JULy/AUGUST

2009

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11

feel these spiritual feelings that other folks have.

, "I'm 41 now, but most of my adult life (going back as
far as age 14) 1struggled with believing in the existence of
God. 1had so many questions, even at that early age. Why
did God stop talking to us (verbally}? .. Why do we have to
Dear David,
have a hell?
"My mother, knowing 1had these questions, would set
up meetings with myself and the pastor and he would always
"1 recently heard your BlogTalk radio show on Atheism
and 1think you did an excellent job of telling your story and point to scriptures to explain all of my questions. That wasn t
enough for me because the Bible is a book.
analyzing the Bible and the concept of God. 1am an African
"1 guess if 1had to label myself, 1would say that 1am
American man living in the South, so you can imagine that 1
was raised in a religious (Baptist) household. 1was forced to more of a 'closet Atheist. '1don ~publicly tell anyone that 1
go to church as a child. .. 1could never figure out why 1didn't question the existence of God because people FREAK OUT
fter hosting my first online radio show, I received
a letter from a listener who struggles as a closet
Atheist. Here are some excerpts from his writing;
perhaps some of you can relate:

12

AMERICANATHEIST JULy/AUGUST 2009

and get hysterical.

,
"They cannot handle a mere discussion about the
possibility of there being no God. They think that they
are getting a one-way ticket to hell just for having the
discussion ... Many of them get angry and furious and tell me
that I am going to suffer damnation in hell.
"I will continue to remain anonymous and I don't tell
anyone my true questions and beliefs ...I will also keep
checking your page for more material from you. I look
forward to it. "
Anonymous

tl!lll!!l!lll!!ll

Anonymous,
Thank you very much for your comments, and thanks
for listening!
We've all been in a bad relationship, where we struggle
to make things work, thinking we can force happiness-and
it never comes. Then one day, we find that special someone
and suddenly realize, while some work is always needed, it's
such a relief to love someone you believe in!
Well, religion and free thought have a similar relationship.
For a while, I was a bit of a closet Atheist myself until I
started reading material other Atheists had written. It felt so
cleansing to finally read something that made sense, instead

of trying to force nonsense to work out rationally. What a

relief it was to read an Atheist write his or her thoughts or
clearly state his or her case in a debate!
Once I finally felt at home and at peace with being an
Atheist (first trying to get over the bad taste that word left
in my mouth due to years of sociological brainwashing), I
began to feel this awesome lift of burdens leaving me that
could never return. I have no more guilt for being born. I
have no more sinning qualities. My morals are humanistic
principles, and I've never been happier! That is a joy that I
cannot explain.
Seeing that type of freedom enrages those of faith,
because they don't understand how you can have love, peace,
happiness, and be successful without ever praying.
To an Atheist, this new lifestyle brings confidence and
contentment. It frees up so much time to do work for others
and help those in need. The true humanist can come out
once you're no longer afraid of gods or preachers or church
societies that may judge you. You're not asking "What Would
Jesus Do?" Instead, you're asking someone less fortunate,
"What do you need ME to do? "
Looking at religions objectively, you finally realize that
worshippers' lives are based on hiding how they really feel,
hiding the things they really do, making excuses for their
'sinful' actions, and being too afraid to face the possibility of
being alone in this universe. Once you accept those as facts
and no longer fear them, you have an amazing power to be
you. You no longer have to live by some conjured up 'moral
code,' and your instincts can be set free.
In time, I hope your Atheism shines through and
eventually leads you to a life of Humanism and secular
giving and volunteering. Regardless of where your beliefs or
non-beliefs take you, please continue your research.
I recommend first and foremost, reading the Bible.
Seriously. An objective ethical look into the Bible was the
primary cause of my Atheism. Also, read Atheism Advanced
by Prof. David Eller (available at atheists.org). I'm just
finishing that up and it has been amazing! Also, to stay
current on lawsuits, and the latest battles facing Atheists of
our time, I of course have to recommend subscribing to the
American Atheist magazine, of which I so proudly design!
(Also available at atheists.org.)
And if this research leads you to Christianity, or any
other religion-then
so be it! At the end of the day, the
important thing is finding that way of life that allows you
to be comfortable in your own skin. Whether you're black,
white, homosexual, Muslim, Christian, or Atheist, the closet
is no place to live.
I hope to hear from you again. Feel free to anonymously
post any questions you may have on my web-site, as I would
love to chat. Keep thinking, and keep debating.
Sincerely,
David Smalley
JULy/AUGUST

2009

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The Christ-Myth Theory

By Frank R. Zindler

homas Paine, the originator of the name "The United

States of America," wrote a long letter on August 15,
1806, to one Andrew Dean of New York. Criticizing
the Christian Bible and the various characters in it, Paine
made some shocking claims:
"The fable of Christ and his twelve apostles, which
is a parody on the sun and the twelve signs of the zodiac,
copied from the ancient religions of the eastern world,
is the least hurtful part. Everything told of Christ has
reference to the sun. His reported resurrection is at sunrise,
and that on the first day of the week; that is, on the day
anciently dedicated to the sun, and from thence called
Sunday-in
Latin Dies Solis, the day of the sun; as the
next day, Monday, is Moon-day ... "
In 1807, near the end of his life, Paine wrote the littleknown Part Three of The Age of Reason: Examination of
the Prophecies. This is a very rare book that I edited and
annotated for publication by American Atheist Press back
in 1993. (The book is still available for purchase at <www.
atheists.org>.) In that last work to be published during his
life (he died June 8, 1809), Paine made what I consider to be
the first statement in English of what is now known as the
"Christ-Myth Theory":
"These repeated forgeries and falsifications create
a well-founded suspicion that all the cases spoken of
concerning the person called Jesus Christ are made
cases ... that so far from his being the Son of God, he did
not exist even as a man - that he is merely an imaginary
or allegorical character, as Apollo, Hercules, Jupiter and
all the deities of antiquity were. There is no history written
at the time Jesus Christ is said to have lived that speaks of
the existence of such a person, even as a man."
It is very likely that Paine was catalyzed to this
conclusion back in Paris, where Charles Dupuis was
publishing the thirteen volumes of his treatise Origine des
Taus les Cultes ('The Origin of All Worship'). Dupuis traced
the origins of all religions to astral phenomena and explained
the astrological and astronomical meanings of many features
of ancient religions.
It was nearly impossible for Paine to publish his book,
and it would not be reprinted until Moncure D. Conway
printed The Writings of Thomas Paine in 1894-96. Even then,
it was lost amidst the literary treasures of those volumes.
The theory that Jesus was a myth has been rediscovered
at least every 20-40 years since the time of Thomas Paine.
In every case, it has been almost impossible to publish and
distribute Christ-Myth books and essays to more than a
miniscule reading public. Everywhere, such writings have

14

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been made to precipitate into the abyss of oblivion by the

prevailing forces of Christian tradition. From time to time,
apologists for the ignorance industry have taken brief notice
of such scholars, claimed they had been refuted, and then
buried their ideas in the refuse heaps of scholarly history.
In the 1980s, Madalyn Murray O'Hair startled meand all the other members of American Atheists-by
announcing that she was writing a book to be called Jesus
Christ Superfraud. I was alarmed, embarrassed, and worried
that she might have suffered some sort of cerebral incident.
I immediately set out to see how I might effect 'damage
control.' I sought to find what I presumed would be copious
evidence of an historical' Jesus of Nazareth. '
Within three months I began to worry that I myself
might have suffered some cerebral incident, for I discovered
instead that the Historical Jesus stood on three extremely
shaky legs:
(1)
The witness of the New Testament,
especially the gospels
(2)
Alleged Pagan witnesses
(3)
Alleged Jewish witnesses, including the
historian Josephus.
All three legs of the historical Jesus quickly were broken
and I rallied to Madalyn's side with the publication of a
series of articles in American Atheist, beginning with "Did
Jesus Exist?' This was followed by "How Jesus Got a Life,"
"Where Jesus Never Walked," and "The Twelve: Further
Fictions From the New Testament." My book The Jesus the
Jews Never Knew was devoted entirely to demonstrating that
the ancient Jews not only never heard of Jesus of Nazareth,
they never heard of Nazareth!
It should come as no surprise that I could not publish
these writings in mainstream technical journals or under the
imprint of major commercial publishers. To claim that Jesus
Christ never lived is almost like revealing membership in the _
Flat Earth Society. It is virtually impossible to find publishers
and distributors or marketers for such research. Even now,
American Atheist Press titles are blackballed by all major
bookstore chains and it is only because of the Internet that
AAP at last has found an international market for its ideas.
Thanks to the Internet, we now are beginning to witness
a paradigm shift in religious studies. It turns out that there
are scholars all over the world who independently have
rediscovered the Christ-Myth Theory. I am reminded of the
fact that the Theory of Natural Selection was discovered
independently of Darwin by Alfred Russel Wallace. In
biblical studies as in biological science, I think, the truth
is 'out there' and must of necessity be discovered and

rediscovered until it becomes 'common knowledge.'

Several months ago American Atheists joined forces with
a small consortium of New Testament scholars known as The
Mythicists' Forum to award a thousand-dollar prize for the
best essay that "sheds light on the origins of Christianity
and, at the same time, supports the proposition that Jesus of
Nazareth did not exist."
To my knowledge, this is the first time in the history
of the world at which such heretical research has been
encouraged financially. While the focus for the moment is
on the thousand-dollar prize and the promise of publication,

the long-range expectation is that this will facilitate the

attainment of a scholarly 'critical mass,' a self-sustaining
program of research that will, by virtue of its scientific
methodology, .assemble a faculty of research scholars that
will not only bring to an end the' quest of the historical Jesus, '
but will allow fair-minded men and women to see-perhaps
for the first time in two millennia-the
braided and tangled
beginnings of one of the theopolitical movements that now
have brought our species to the verge of hara-kiri.
The rules and regulations for the contest are published in
this issue of American Atheist. Let the games begin!

2010 Mythicist
Essay Contest

The Mythicists' Forum, a consortium of

New Testament scholars, together with American Atheists, Inc.,
have the pleasure to announce the 2010 Mythicist Prize.
THE PRIZE

The sum of$I,OOO (U.S.) will be awarded to the author of a submitted essay which, in the opinion of the judges, sheds
light on the origins of Christianity and at the same time supports the proposition that Jesus of Nazareth did not exist.
ELIGIBILITY
Anyone is eligible to submit an essay. The prizewinning contribution will be published in 2010, along with submissions of
distinction which merit an Honorable Mention. The publisher will be announced at the time of the award.
SUBMISSION
Contestants are limited to one essay each. Three copies ofthe work should be mailed in one package to:
2010 Mythicist Prize, 346 Crest Drive, Eugene, OR 97405 U.S.A.
DEADLINES

FOR RECEIPT

OF SUBMISSIONS

From the U.S.A.: Dec. 1,2009. From other countries: Dec. 15,2009.
LANGUAGE

OF SUBMISSION

Essays must be written in one of the following languages: English, German, French, Italian, Spanish.
JUDGES
Rene Salm, Robert M. Price, Frank R. Zindler, Earl Doherty. The decision of the judges is final. The prizewinner will be
announced at the 2010 American Atheist National Convention. (Note: If no submission is deemed worthy of receiving the
Mythicist Prize, then the prize will not be awarded.)
FORMAT
Essays must be 30-100 pages in length and double-spaced. Submissions should preferably be printed (or typed) on both
sides of the paper. Footnotes or endnotes are permissible and a bibliography is required. Pages are to be numbered, with
the author's name and the title of the essay on each page. Also, the author's name, address, as well as e-mail address
should appear on the first or cover page. Submissions via email and digital files on computer disk are not permitted, but
contributors should be prepared to supply a digital copy of their essay if requested.
For further information, please write to "2010 Mythicist Prize" at the address above, or email Mr.ReneSalmatrjs@epud.net.
JULy/AUGUST

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American Atheists Letter to the Editor Competition 2010

Rules:
The Letter to the Editor Competition 2010 is open only to members of American Atheists.
To enter, send the uncut and complete newspaper page containing your published letter.
Letters must be published between January 1 and December 31, 2009.
Entries need to be received on or before January 30, 2010.
Include your address, telephone number, and your e-mail address (should you have one).
Letters can cover any issue of importance which advances the Atheist cause.
Letters will be judged by educational content, persuasiveness, and how well they
portray Atheism in a positive light.
Members of the board, officers, and State and Regional Directors are ineligible to enter.
The winner will be announced at the national Convention 2010; the winner will receive
an American Atheist award plaque and one free year of membership in American Atheists.
All entered letters will be displayed at Convention 2010.
Send your entries to:
Neal Cary
P. O. Box 828, Glen Allen, VA 23060-0828

Winner of the American Atheists Letter to the Editor Competition 2009

Published by the Laguna Beach Independent, March 21, 2008
Editor:
to passively let the majority marginalize or
April Fool's day is approaching and this silence me. This fool in his heart feels that the
damned fool (the damned part taken literally by U.S. Constitution gives him the right to lead an
some) would like to comment on foolishness.
unobtrusive life (contrary to the pious).
Psalm 14.1 says, "The fool hath said in his heart,
Most importantly, I1we imbue our children
There is no God." The psalm goes on to say, with humanistic ethics, kindness, values, and
"They (me and over one million other Americans)
morality. We cherish our children's youthful
are corrupt, have done abominable works, there innocence, spontaneity and joyfulness. We
is none that doeth good."
prolong and savor those irreplaceable childhood
Guess whom it is that we see on TV and read joys by abstaining from indoctrinating them with
about in the newspapers that are caught being . fearful hell and damnation ideas.
What is beyond belief (pun?) is that anyone
corrupt, doing abominable works (especially
sexual abuse of children and the cover up of would sacrifice experiencing this one and only
same) and doing bad things? It's the very people
beautiful, natural and happy life for some
who embrace Psalm 14.1! So who is the fool, or nebulous otherworldly promises. And I'm not
more to the point, who is it that is being fooled?
fooling.
IlWe are not foolish enough to believe that
we don't have equal rights in this democratic
Niko Theris, Laguna Beach
secular nation. I for one am not foolish enough

16

AMERICAN

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2009

.dress you rself

starting at $10

at atheists.orq/store

ProuddUt; to he
AMERICA a,.

\VW'W

theia org

No
Stll>missioll
American Atheists
www.atheists.oll'g

JULy/AUGUST 2009

- AMERICAN ATHEIST

17

~
MILITARY DIRECTOR
Kathleen Johnson
411 E. Hwy 190 Ste. 105
PMB66
Copperas Cove, TX 76522
(318) 542-1019
kjohnson@atheists.org
http://www.atheists.org/mil

CONNECTICUT
STATE
DIRECTOR
Dennis Paul Himes
P.O. Box 9203
Bolton, CT 06043
(860) 643-2919
dphimes@atheists.org
http://www. atheists. org/ctl

MISSOURI STATE
DIRECTOR
Greg Lammers
P.O. Box 1352
Columbia, MO 65205
(573) 289-7633
glammers@atheists.org
http://www.atheists.org/mo/

ALABAMA
STATE
DIRECTOR
Blair Scott
P.O. Box 41
Ryland, AL 35767-2000
(256) 701-6265
bscott@atheists.org
http://www.atheists.org/ali

FLORIDA STATE DIRECTOR

Greg McDowell
P.O. Box 680741
Orlando, FL 32868-0741
(352) 217-3470
gmcdowell@atheists.org
Ken Loukinen
(So. FL Reg. Dir.)
7972 Pines Blvd., #246743
Pembroke Pines, FL 33024
(954) 381-5240
kloukinen@atheists.org
http://www.atheists.org/fl/

NEW JERSEY
STATE DIRECTOR
David Silverman
1308 Centennial Ave.,
Box 101
Piscataway, NJ 08854
(732) 648-9333
dsilverman@atheists.org
http://www.atheists.org/nj/

ALASKA STATE DIRECTOR

Clyde Baxley
3713 Deborah Ln.
Anchorage, AK 99504
(907) 333-6499
cbaxley@atheists.org
http://www.atheists.org/aki
ARIZONA STATE DIRECTOR
[NEW]
Don Lacey
P.O. Box 1161
Tucson, AZ 85641-1161
(520) 370-8420
azatheist@atheists.org
http://www.atheists.org/az/
CALIFORNIA
STATE DIRECTOR
Michael Doss
P.O. Box 10541
Santa Ana, CA 92711
(714) 478-8457
mdoss@atheists.org
Mark W. Thomas (Asst. Dir.)
472 Lotus Lane
Mountain View,
CA 94043-4533
(650) 969-5314
mthomas@atheists.org
http://www.atheists.org/ca/

IDAHO STATE DIRECTOR

Susan Harrington
P.O. Box 204
Boise, 10 83701-0204
(208) 392-9981
sharrington@atheists.org
http://www.atheists.org/id/
KENTUCKY STATE
DIRECTOR
Edwin Kagin
P.O. Box 48
Union, KY 41091
(859) 384-7000
ekagin@atheists.org
http://www.atheists.org/ky/
MICHIGAN STATE
DIRECTOR
Arlene-Marie
amarie@atheists.org
George Shiffer (Asst. Dir.)
gshiffer@atheists.org
Both can be reached at:
P.O. Box 0025
Allen Park, MI 48101-9998
(313) 938-5960
http://www.atheists.org/mil

NORTH CAROLINA STATE

DIRECTOR
Wayne Aiken
P.O. Box 30904
Raleigh, NC 27622
(919) 602-8529
waiken@atheists.org
http://www.atheists.org/nc/
OHIO STATE DIRECTOR
Michael Allen
PMB289
1933 E. Dublin-Granville
Rd
Columbus, OH 43229
(614) 678-6470
mallen@atheists.org
http://www.atheists.org/oh
OKLAHOMA
STATE
DIRECTOR
Ron Pittser
P.O. Box 2174
Oklahoma City,
OK 73101-2174
(405) 205-8447
rpittser@atheists.org
http://www.atheists.org/ok/

State Directors
TEXAS STATE DIRECTOR
Joe Zamecki
(512) 462-0572
jzamecki@atheists.org
http://www.atheists.org/tx/
Dick Hogan (TX Reg. Dir.,
Dallas/Ft. Worth)
dhogan@atheists.org
http://www.atheists.org/dfw/
UTAH STATE DIRECTOR
Rich Andrews
P.O. Box 165103
Salt Lake City, UT 84116-5103
(801) 718-7930
randrews@atheists.org
http://www.atheists.org/utl
VIRGINIA STATE DIRECTOR
Rick Wingrove
P.O. Box 774
Leesburg, VA 20178
(703) 433-2464
rwingrove@atheists.org
http://www.atheists.org/val
WASHINGTON
STATE
DIRECTOR
Wendy Britton
12819 SE 38th St., Suite 485
Bellevue, WA 98006
(425) 269-9108
wbritton@atheists.org
http://www.atheists.org/wa/
WEST VIRGINIA STATE
DIRECTOR
Charles Pique
P.O. Box 7444
Charleston, WV 25356-0444
(304) 776-5377
cpique@atheists.org
http://www.atheists.org/wv/

Contacting State Directors

Our directors are not provided with contact information for members in their area. If you're
interested in working with your Director on activism, please use the listing on this page to
contact them. They would love to hear from you!
If you live in a state or area where there is no director, you have been a member for one year
or more, and you're interested in a Director position, please contact:

David Kong, Director of State and Regional Operations

dksf@atheists.org

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JULy/AUGUST

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Blogosphere
Beats Peer
Review in the
Case of Stealth
Creationist
Paper
Massimo
Pigliucci

cademia is notoriously resistant to change, which

to some extent is a good thing. It was therefore no
surprise that when Wikipedia became a phenomenon,
most academics scoffed at it as a passing fad, fatally flawed
by its very core idea: anybody, and I mean anybody, can
become a Wiki author and post new entries or edit existing
ones. Surely, this will inevitably lead to chaos and complete
unreliability, the critics said. But a few years ago a study
of a sample of entries compared the accuracy of Wikipedia
with that of the unquestionably prestigious Encyclopedia
Britannica, and Wikipedia was at least as accurate, in some
cases more.
Of course the 'open access' model does have its limits
and defects, and even Wikipedia has to maintain a certain
amount of vigilance and label particular entries as contentious
or unreliable if there is too much traffic and a lot of editing
and counter-editing (typically concerning political issues or
individual politicians). Still, from apparent chaos the system
has allowed for the emergence of a reasonably reliable firstlook reference source that truly exploits the power of the
internet.
It seems that the next case will come from another
sacred cow of academia: peer review. This is the system
used by modem academics-both
in the' sciences and
the humanities-to
evaluate a scholarly paper before it is
published, the chief gateway to insure the high quality of a
publication, be it in philosophy, literary criticism, medicine,
physics, or what have you. The way it usually works is that
an author submits a paper for consideration to the editor of
a journal in the appropriate field. The editor makes a first
assessment of the manuscript and, if deemed suitable to the

20

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2009

journal, sends it out to two or more reviewers, chosen

from among people actively engaged in research and
scholarship in the field addressed by the submitted
paper.
A certain amount of time later (which can be
irritatingly long for the authors), the reviews come back
with a thumbs up or down verdict, usually accompanied
by (anonymous, and sometimes nasty) comments for the
authors-so that they may revise the original manuscript
and send it back to either the same journal (if so invited)
or to another one. The process repeats itself until either
the paper finds its way into a publication or is forever
abandoned on the heap of wasted efforts.
The peer review system has its obvious advantages
as a gatekeeper for academic publishing quality, but it
has equally obvious drawbacks. First of all, the number
of reviewers is fairly small, which means that the
comments the authors receive may be reflective of the
idiosyncratic views of those individuals and may not
necessarily constitute a good assessment of the general
value of the paper. Second, often (though not always)
the authors don't know who the reviewers are, but the
converse is not true, which leads to the temptation of
stabbing a rival (or a rival's student) in the back.
One can argue that the real peer review actually takes
place over a period of years after the paper (or book) has
been published, and it is the result of how in the long-term
the community at large values the scholarship ofthe authors:
Some papers and books are cited often, some become classics
in their field, and most are never heard of again-which
in
itself is not necessarily an indication of poor quality but
may be a simple reflection of the fact that too many people
publish too much.
What I will call the classic peer review system, the one
that relies on a small number of editor-selected referees
however, is increasingly under challenge. In the physic~
community, for instance, it has been normal practice for years
to post pre-publication versions of one's paper on internet
servers, to get feedback from the rest of the community
before formal submission. People can now refer others to
these pre-prints by hyperlinks, almost as if they were actual
publications, thereby blurring the distinction between formal
and informal scholarship. Moreover, an increasing number
of open access journals now encourages readers' comments
and even rankings to be posted for each paper, occasionally
allowing authors to respond and engage in an open dialogue
with the community.
This is, I think, a trend that is here to stay, and that
will likely completely change the meaning and practice of
academic research over the next decade or so. Still, perhaps
the most spectacular-if
somewhat under-reported-case
of open peer review showed how the blogosphere can be a
more effective guardian of scholarship than a small number
of overworked editors and reviewers.

their web site before they are actually printed.

What happened was that two people,
Mohamad Warda and Jin Han, affiliated According to an article in the National
with Inje University in Korea, submitted a Center for Science Education Reports, the
paper to the prestigious journal Proteomics.
first to note the oddity of Warda and Han's
The paper was entitled 'Mitochondria, the paper was Steven Salzberg, a professor
Missing Link between Body and Soul: of computer science at the University of
Proteomic Prospective Evidence," something
Maryland, who blogged about it. That led to
that should have alerted the Editor, Michael
blog posts by Attila Cordas, Lars Juhl Jensen
and PZ Myers, and eventually to the editor
Dunn, and the reviewers that something
was amiss (a proteomic paper on dualism
of Proteomics requesting a withdrawal of the
and the question of the soul?). Warda and paper by the authors, who complied.
Interestingly, the request to withdraw
Han's review of the literature was meant as a
criticism ofthe currently accepted theory that was not based on the creationist claim, but
the mitochondria (the cellular organelles that on the fact that the bloggers had uncovered
are involved in the production of the energy another problem with the paper that had
that keeps the metabolism of the organism
escaped reviewer and referees: the entire
going) are the result of an evolutionary
body of the article by Warda and Han
endosymbiotic event; in other words, that had been plagiarized from other, already
they originated from the engulfment of published, sources! Apparently, their only
original contributions were writing in really
a bacterial cell by an ancestor of modem
plants, animals and fungi.
awful English and references to the soul and
Warda and Han wrote: "Alternatively,
the mighty creator.
instead of sinking into a swamp of endless
The moral of the story is that the much
maligned blogosphere ("you know, anybody
debates about the evolution of mitochondria,
it is better to come up with a unified can write whatever they want, and nobody's
assumption. ... More logically, the points checking") in this case clearly surpassed the
that show proteomics overlapping between
official, academically sanctioned system
different forms of life are more likely to be of peer review. My hunch is that this isn't
interpreted as a reflection of a single common
going to be the last time this happens and
fingerprint initiated by a mighty creator than that we are looking at the dawn of a new era
relying on a single cell that is, in a doubtful
of academic practice, when papers will be
way, surprisingly originating all other kinds scrutinized by thousands of reviewers within
of life."
a matter of hours from publication. Ifwe can
It is difficult to make sense of the harness this tremendous intellectual power
in a reasonably orderly fashion, we will
badly written phrase (no language editors
at Proteomics?), but surely the reviewers
make the next leap toward a truly worldwide
should have been a bit surprised by the community of scholars and authors.
obviously unscientific phrase "a mighty
creator." Regardless of whether one thinks
that concepts like soul and divine creators
make any sense at all (I don't), they surely do
not belong to an ostensibly scientific paper.
I am not at all suggesting that Dunn or his
reviewers are intelligent design creationists:
they simply missed the supernatural
references, presumably because they were
too busy and distracted by the mountain of. Massimo Pigliucci is a life member of
very technical language surrounding that American Atheists. He teaches evolution
specific phrase (though how they missed and philosophy at Stony Brook University
in New York, and his essays can be found at
the title is a bit more difficult to rationalize
rationallyspeaking.org. His most recent book
away).
The happy ending to the story is the result is Making Sense of Evolution (with Jonathan
of the normal practice that Proteomics has, as Kaplan), published by the University of
do many other journals, of posting papers on Chicago Press.

Visit us at
atheists .org
to renew
your
membership

and be
sure to tell
afriend
about this
organization
and what
we stand
for. Our
members are
the lifeline
of our cause,
and we're

growing
stronger
each year!
~

JULy/AUGUST

2009

- AMERICAN

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21

hen time was young, and I couldn't have been

much older than a boy of five, I first saw the fake
painting of Jesus hanging on the door leading
to the basement of the Methodist church in Rembrandt,
Iowa, population two hundred and twenty or so mostly
Scandinavian souls. With a child's credulity, I mistook it for
a photograph and wondered if there might be others taken
with Mary and Joseph. Jesus was staring upward toward
what I believed to be the direction of heaven, his face and
long brown hair bathed in a golden radiance more diffuse
than any halo. When I asked Millie Blackwell, my harried
Sunday school teacher, about the picture, she told me that it
was the work of an artist named Warner Sallman, who had
undergone a profound spiritual transformation.
"What does that mean?" I replied.
"Well, it means that the artist had a vision of Jesus's face
and later did a painting just like the one on the door, except
that it's a copy."
Not far from Sallman's idealized portrait was a more
disturbing image of Jesus carved out of wood. Nailed hand

sparing fidgety worshipers such as myself the temptation

of gazing longingly into the distance, where sun and sky
conspired to create perfect summer Sundays. On one side
were an anchor, which reminded me that Jesus had chosen a
fisherman as his first and most trusted disciple, and an open
book inscribed with the Greek letters 'alpha' and 'omega,'
according to Saint John the first and the last, the beginning
and the end. Opposite these windows were a bouquet of
white lilies, for purity I guessed, and a cross encircled by a
crown for the 'King of Heaven.'
There was a small balcony to handle the overflow crowds
that always materialized at Easter and Christmas services,
or when some well-regarded member of the community
died, such as my Grandpa Tony did when I was seven. He
had risen shortly before dawn to get a drink of water, or so
he told Grandma as he slipped out of their huge brass bed.
Within seconds, she heard a great crash in the dining room.
The doctor who signed the death certificate told Father that
Grandpa had been felled by something called a coronary
thrombosis; he was dead before he hit the floor.

Confessions of a
Childhood Atheist
Gale E. Christianson

and foot to a rude cross, suspended in agony morning, noon,

and throughout the dark of night, he would never be taken
down by his closest followers, never be laid to rest in the
cool air of the stone sepulcher, no matter what the Bible said.
Not even so much as a sponge dipped in fetid water to slake
his raging thirst.
Such was my introduction to religion.
In the nave of our little brick church, capped by a fake
Norman bell tower and crenelated walls, stood fourteen oak
pews, seven to a side. They faced the simple altar and the
spinet that my Grandma Anna played for many years until
the congregation finally scraped together enough money to
purchase a small organ. Grandma's tiny head and severely
humped back, the result of a childhood" injury, bobbed up
and down in unison as she struck each chord with gnarled
fingers, her hawkish eyes darting back and forth between
the sheet music and the keyboard, reminding me of another
hunchback to whom the church had once granted sanctuary
among the labyrinthine bell ropes and soaring arches of
Notre Dame cathedral.
Our church windows were made of stained glass, thus

22

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. JULy/AUGUST

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A strange thing happened when my parents came into

my bedroom to tell me that my fishing days with Grandpa
were over-forever.
I don't remember crying, either then
or later on at the funeral, my first. But as I lay there in the
gray light, I suddenly realized that someday everyone who
knew Grandpa would also be gone: Grandma Anna, Father,
Mother, Uncle Kenny, Aunt Mary Ellen, the neighbors, Rev.
Weikel, Grandpa's fishing buddies, the barber Roy Cannoy,
who trimmed the edges of his natural tonsure once a monthall of them. I would be the only one left to remember, the
last person on earth to have known what Grandpa Tony was
really like. Then, after a while, I too would die, and Grandpa
would truly be no more.
As was still common in those days, they brought
Grandpa home for the last time in a long black hearse the
day before the funeral, where I made a close study of him
and the etiquette of death. He lay in the living room opposite
Grandma's walnut piano, on which she always practiced so
diligently for the coming week's service. He was dressed in
a dark suit and tie, both of which he despised. Nor would he
have taken any better to the billows of sissyish white satin

that framed his gentle face and broad shoulders.

I had no idea what death was except that it wasn't life.
'Slipped away' is what the adults were accustomed to calling
it, as if death was an accident that could have been prevented
if only you had been wearing your overshoes, or hadn't
forgotten to use the handrail while climbing a steep flight of
stairs. Not only was Grandpa absolutely still, he seemed to
be suspended in midair, like a magician's assistant. Many of
those who came to stand next to the coffin and peer inside
remarked on his peacefulness, of how he looked like he was
only sleeping. How dumb, I thought. Couldn't they see?
Grandpa's eyelids never once flickered; his barrel chest
and ample belly were completely at rest. He neither spoke
nor snored nor took the slightest notice of the
accidental fuss he had caused. Grandpa wasn't
asleep, and he was never going to reawakenhe was dead before he hit the floor.
Sunday school began at ten o'clock
while 'regular church' started an hour later.
Attendance
was all-important,
and the
headcounts for both church and Sunday
school were prominently displayed on a large
signboard next to the altar. As an incentive to
the young, the church gave you a white enamel
pin to wear on your dress or lapel if you went
thirteen weeks in a row without missing a
Sunday, one week each for the twelve disciples,
plus another for Jesus himself. Absences for

fastidious for a man living among balding farmers, an

aquiline nose, and dark, x-ray eyes that made you feel guilty
of something, just being in his presence. More than anything
else, he was in love with the sound of his own baritone voice
and had developed the habit of repeating his favorite phrases
for effect, and always with great solemnity: "Though you
are sinners, Jesus is the light and the way. Yes, the light
and the way. The light and the way." Most members of the
congregation were pretty well aware of their individual
shortcomings and weren't particularly receptive to an
outsider's comments on the condition of their mortal souls,
especially one who so conveniently absolved himself of any
taint of human weakness.
Sunday school cost a dime and was
like grade school art class, but with a
religious twist. We were supplied with
biblically-inspired
coloring
books,
crayons, construction paper, glue, and
scissors, all in an attempt by a besieged
Mrs. Blackwell to keep us quiet for, what
to her, must have been the longest hour
of the week. Sometimes she told us Bible
stories that raised a lot of questions, and
much to her credit she did her best to
answer them whenever she thought we
weren't just pulling her leg.
I once asked her about the Trinity, and
I could tell immediately by the dark cloud

on Sunday picnics with his buddies, none of

which qualified as a religious pilgrimage.
A second pin in the shape of a gold wreath encircled the
first one. Then came a series of interlocking metal bars, each
of a different color. By this time, all of the boys except the
McGrew twins, whose mother raised parakeets and had to
stick around on weekends to feed them, had conceded defeat,
only to be faced by a weekly display of female steadfastness
trailing from breast to navel, like Jacob's ladder.
Our ministers usually served a term of three years, after
which they were transferred to another church. Rev. Weikel,
of whom my memory is exceedingly dim, was replaced by
the Rev. T. Ernest Hoon, who, unlike his predecessor, never
seemed to grow much on the congregation. He sported a
snow-white pompadour, about which he was uncommonly

chain-laden Jacob Marley.) "Now here is

the difficult part. The three aren't truly three but one."
Her beseeching eyes scanned my face for the slightest
flicker of understanding but saw none. It was three by my
count and three couldn't be one. Nor, conversely, could one
be three. Little did I know it then but there were many people,
some of them downright brilliant, who denied the Trinity's
existence, including the great Isaac Newton, who added up
the numbers and reached the same total as I did.
Neither did I grasp certain of the parables. Especially
confounding was the story of the prodigal son. The guy went
off and lived a sinful life for years before finally returning
home, impoverished and disgraced. So what did his father
do? Why, he forgave him as if nothing had happened, while
the other son, who had stuck it out through thick and thin, got

A strange
thing
happened
when my
parents came
into my
bedroo m to
illness didn't count against you. And if you tell me that my that passed across her deeply lined face
happened to be on vacation or visiting relatives
that it wasn't a subject with which she felt
out of town,. a ~ote from the minister of anot~er fis hing davs
the least bit comfortable. Still, she did her
church venfymg that you had attended Its
'J
best.
se~vic~s was ~uf~cient. While I st~ggled with Grandoa
"God," she began, "exists in three
mightily to mamtam a perfect record, It took
r persons, all of whom are equal. There is
me the better part of two y~ars before I finally
were over-- God the Father, God the Son, who is Jesus,
earned my one and only pm, largely because
and God the Holy Ghost." (Her mention of
Father, an avid ham radio operator, liked to go
fo rever.
the latter put me in mind of Scrooge and a

JULy/AUGUST

2009

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ATHEIST

23

little or nothing for his troubles. I could only conclude that

religion was much like everything else in life; you just had
to let some thing pass without asking too many questions.
After Sunday school, we children joined our parents in
the sanctuary, where we were securely wedged between their
shoulders as a precaution against mischief-making. We stood
while the hymnals were removed from their wooden racks
and distributed among the congregation. This was about as
close as I ever got to my Father, physically or otherwise. It
seemed strange and not a little embarrassing to look down
and see his cracked and bony fingers holding onto one side
of the songbook and mine the other. As we joined in, I could
feel the vibration of his tenor voice through the pages:
Rock of Ages, deft for me,
Let me hide myself in thee;
Let the water and the blood,
From Thy wounded side which flowed
Be of sin the double cure,
Save from wrath and make me pure.
At such moments, I was overcome by a mixture of piety
and grandeur. All things seemed possible; all hope eternal;
all prayers answerable. Flanked by the American flag on one
side and a Christian banner with a red cross on the other, I
was the spiritual descendant of the Children's Crusade, with
my very own anthem:
Onward Christian soldiers,
Marching as to war,
With the cross of Jesus
Going on before.
Christ the royal Master
Leads against the foe;
Forward into battle,
See His banners go!
Just up the street, at the very same hour, the Lutheran
youth were in a no-less martial frame of mind, inspired
by a hymn written by the founder of their church, the
excommunicated monk Martin Luther. When Luther feared
himself in danger of being executed, the combative cleric set
pen to paper, the result of which was 'A Mighty Fortress Is
our God.'
And though the world with devils filled,
Should threaten to undo us,
We will not fear for God hath willed
His truth to triumph through us.
In truth, Luther's 'devils' were poorly disguised Roman
Catholics. And it was from one of the Lutheran boys in grade
school that I had first heard them referred to as 'minnow
munchers' and 'mackerel snappers.' That same youth later
told me that the Catholics were breeding like rabbits as part
of a popish plot to take over the world. Though I was not
wholly convinced ofthis, it was enough to bring me up short
the next time we recited the Apostles' Creed. "I believe in the

24

AMERICAN

ATHEIST'

JULy/AUGUST

2009

... holy Catholic Church," it said.

As usual, I turned to Mother for an explanation. "It doesn't
mean Catholics like your friends the Cremers brothers, silly.
It means all the Christian churches put together." But if
we're all together, then why do we have different churches
with different names and different ministers?"
"Well, that's just the way it is. It goes back hundreds
of years, maybe thousands. The important thing is that we
treat one another with a little respect. We're all praying to the
same God, you know."
I was about to bring up the Hindus and the Buddhists, of
whom I had learned a little in school, but I thought better of
the idea given Mother's edginess.
The first time I saw God-or thought I did-was during
another of Rev. Hoon 's enervating sermons. The sun's rays had
penetrated the stained glass windows along the eastern wall,
projecting their magical colors into the sanctuary. I watched
while the prismatic finger of God inched its way across Ken
Hadenfelt's shoulders and onto Lillian Seifken's large black
purse, as if checking up to see if she had contributed all that
she could afford, given the fact that her husband Omar had
just bought a brand new Packard. After crossing the aisle, it
paused in Vera Stratton's lap before moving on to encircle
Mrs. Waldron's ancient visage, transforming the octogenarian
into a living, breathing window of glass. Centuries ago, this
might have been taken as a holy sign, or as a premonition of
a beautiful death, or perhaps the annunciation of a miracle.
I leaned forward involuntarily, reaching out to God in hopes
of experiencing his touch, but just as I did so, Father checked
me with an elbow to the ribs.
It was only after a maddening series of damp and gloomy
Sunday mornings that conditions were again right for a divine
visitation. After a long wait, my patience was rewarded when
a vivid ray came to rest on the nape of Mother's soft neck.
Mindful of Father's looming presence, I reached up ever so
gingerly and touched the colors, only to discover that they
contained nothing of substance whatsoever. Nothing at all.
About mid-December, a giant fir suddenly appeared next
to the altar, and each child was asked to help decorate it by
bringing an ornament from home. After much deliberation, I
chose a black and silver star made of tin. Standing on tiptoe,
I stretched to place it as high up in the branches as possible,
for everyone to see.
We sang loads of Christmas carols during the next couple
of weeks and improvised shamelessly when there were no
adults around.
We three kings of Orient are,
Smoking on a rubber cigar.
It was loaded and exploded,
Now we're on the planet Mars.
'Silent Night' was desecrated when we substituted
"round John Virgin" for "round yon Virgin," though, truth be

told, few of us had even the slightest notion of what a virgin

was. And 'Hark! The Herald Angels Sing' became 'Hark!
The Hair-Oiled Angels Sing.'
Christmas Eve found the whole family, indeed the entire
town, in church. Mother was sometimes in charge of what
was grandiosely termed 'the Christmas pageant.' One year,
when she couldn't persuade anyone else to play the parts
of Mary and Joseph, she roped Father into joining her on
the stage, but only because he had no lines to speak. When
the makeshift curtain parted, they were standing together in
bathrobes staring blankly at what appeared to be a plastic doll
lying in a clump of hay donated by some local farmer. Mrs.
Blackwell read the Christmas story from the Book of Luke:
"And Mary brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped
him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger, because
there was no room for them in the inn." Adoration, it must
be said, was no longer the powerful emotion it had been in
biblical times, and my parents looked more like a couple of
deer caught in a poacher's headlights than potential saints.
When the pageant was over, we each received a bag of
candy, a perfectly-shaped red apple all the way from the state
of Washington, and a present from home. Grandpa gave me
a jackknife with a black handle and a silver chain the year
before he died. Mother promptly put it away for safety's sake
until I was older, which, as I remember, never came.
After church, we all went to Grandma's and Grandpa's
to open our gifts, because that the way they did it in the 'old
country,' meaning Norway. Grandma told of how her mother
placed real candles on the family tree when she was a child,
a moment she looked forward to all year long. Then, at the
stroke of midnight, as the church bells began tolling Jesus's
birth, her father lit the candles, and for a few precious minutes
the world was aglow and as beautiful as it could ever be.
My parents looked markedly different the next time they
stepped up to the altar, their bathrobes and blank stares all
but forgotten. Father was wearing his Sunday suit and tie,
Mother a light cotton dress in a futile attempt to keep cool in
the stifling heat of late August. In her arms was my new baby
brother, flailing and crying for all he was worth, the way he
so often did at home. Still, I was very proud when Rev. Hoon
took him in his arms and sprinkled his rubbery forehead with
consecrated water from a golden bowl. "In the name of the
Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost, I baptize you Thomas
Ray Christianson," for whose All-American name I was
responsible. The onlookers broke into applause, and I felt like
I should be the one taking a bow. Beyond that, 'Tommy' was
cute and sometimes distracting, but what could you really do
with a brother who pooped in his diapers eight times a day
and was half a dozen years younger than yourself?
The exhilaration I felt at the end of Sunday services was
quickly displaced by an intimation of dread, a fey sense that
the prophesied end of the world was at hand. Every business

on the main drag locked its doors, transforming Rembrandt

into an imitation ghost town. Not a lawn mower could be
heard; hot-rodding teenagers like Kenny Obman abandoned
the streets; every clothesline was bare while the raucous
games of children were suspended by custom, if not by law.
Oppressive was the word for it, like purgatory descending.
I later joined the Methodist Youth Fellowship, better
known as MYF, at my parents' insistence. A dozen or so of
us were loaded into cars one freezing March night for the
thirty-mile drive to Newell, where we delivered a 'Traveling
Cross' to our counterparts at the local church, an act deemed
worthy of getting our names in the Rembrandt Booster. After
keeping the cross for a week or so, the Newell kids hauled
it over to Truesdale, a scant ten miles south of us, and so on.
For all I know, the cross is still being driven, willy-nilly, over
country roads by the grandchildren of the pioneering dozen.
One Sunday evening, the MYF was called into special
session at the church, where we were introduced to a dapper
stranger with the palpable air of a leprechaun. We seated
ourselves before a table our diminutive visitor had covered
with an elegant velvet cloth, and watched intently as he
ceremoniously withdrew the contents of his bulging valise.
Among the many treasures laid before us were gold rings,
silver pins, Bibles, and various other objects guaranteed to
lead us into temptation. His message was simple enough.
All we had to do to earn what he called 'premiums' was to
memorize certain verses from the Bible, the New Testament
in particular. The more passages we committed to memory,
the greater would be our rewards, both spiritually and
materially speaking. Anxious to get us off on the right foot,
our benefactor handed each of us a sheet of paper on which
was printed John 3:16: "For God so loved the world that
He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth
in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life." After
we read the verse aloud, he gave each of us a copy of The
Upper Room, a daily devotional guide that Grandma Anna
accumulated by the stack. Only later did I discover that the
issue I had received was a good six months out of date.
Several of us arrived at school the next morning toting
Bibles. Such was our zeal that we sacrificed recess and all
our precious playground time after lunch to grill one another
on passages from the Apostle Paul's letters to the Corinthians
and the Revelation of St. John. It was from the latter that I
learned of horrors greater than any I could have imagined
on my own: "And I looked, and beheld a pale horse; and his
name that sat on him was Death, and Hell followed with him.
And power was given unto them over the fourth part of the
earth to kill with sword, and with hunger, and with death, and
with the beasts ofthe earth."
Death. Always the grim specter of death in religion.
What happened to a baby when it died in infancy, as had
Grandma's lost twin? To the bank robber and the murderer
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once their hard hearts were stilled? And if you were lucky
enough to live out your biblical three score years and ten,
then what? How could those measly seventy years-and
what you did or didn't do with them-save
or damn your
soul through all eternity? It was like carrying the weight f
the universe around on your back all day every day without
respite, asking infinitely more of a single human being than
he could possibly give, like Jesus on the cross.
Still, it was St. John who had gotten me the gold ring I so
coveted, as he had the other members of MYF. We received
them one Sunday at church. Inside each band were inscribed
the letters 'IAH,' which stood for 'I Am His,' meaning
Jesus. An accompanying pamphlet told us that we were to
keep the meaning of the inscription secret, which seemed
odd to me in light of the fact that most Christians saw great
virtue in spreading their creed far and wide, even unto death.
Nonetheless, I took the required vow of silence and proudly
donned my shiny new ring. A few days later, when I lifted
my hand to admire it yet again, the gold was clouded over by
a mysterious green patina that kept returning no matter how
many times I washed my hands. The same thing happened to
my friends, causing one ofthem to quip: "What 'IAH' really
stands for is 'I am hooked. '"
The year that had seen Grandpa Tony die of a heart attack
was not yet done with death. I straggled home under an
ominous sky late one afternoon, carrying a bouquet of pussy
willows, only to be shouted at for no apparent reason. "Where
on earth have you been?" Mother demanded to know, placing
her hands on my shoulders and squeezing so hard it hurt. "I
thought something terrible had happened to you!"
"I was out by the tracks with Alan; we were gathering
these pussy willows for you and Alan's mom."
"Pussy willows!" she shot back in anger. "Don't you
ever go near those railroad tracks again! Do you hear me?
Well, do you?"
"Yes, but what did I do wrong? I only wanted to bring
you these. Besides, Alan was with me the whole time."
"Teddy Siekman is dead," she exclaimed, her jaw
quivering uncontrollably! "That's what's wrong."
It couldn't be. Teddy was my age, and kids my age didn't
just die-at least none that I knew of.
Registering my disbelief, Mother nodded, her voice
softening: "It's true; Teddy and her mother were returning
home from shopping when they got into a terrible accident.
It was raining and the car skidded and overturned in a ditch.
Poor Teddy was thrown out and crushed to death."
Everyone agreed that Theo Caroline Siekman was the
closest thing to an angel they had ever known. The second
of three sisters, she was named after her father, Theodore
'Ted' Siekman, who had long wanted a son. Not only was
Teddy a beautiful child, she was unusually kind and gentle,
a transformation that had taken place after she became

26

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2009

entangled in a com elevator and almost died. Her injuries

had left her lying flat on her back for months, her mangled
legs immobilized by a pair of leaden casts that reminded me
of a deep sea diver. When these were finally removed, Teddy
had to learn to walk all over again, and it took another year of
physical therapy before she was able to ride her bicycle and
roller skate with friends. Blaming himself for his daughter's
mishap and for his overwhelming desire for a son, Ted drew
as close to his daughter as any parent ever could have during
her long convalescence.
I promised myself that I wasn't going to look when
the time came. Instead, I would nobly avert my eyes and
remember Teddy just as I had known her in Sunday school,
where her calming presence could instantly quell a room of
raucous youngsters little concerned with original sin or the
question of an afterlife. Yet when I filed by the casket with
my parents, I couldn't resist the macabre temptation to see
if I could tell which side of her head had been injured by
the overturned car, a topic much debated in whispers among
my friends. It happened so quickly that all I remembered
afterward was a lot of strange makeup, which Teddy had
never used, and the new dress she was planning to wear to
church on Easter Sunday.
Teddy was buried in the same cemetery as Grandpa
Tony, not all that far from his grave. A night or two after the
funeral, I had a deeply unsettling dream that would recur at
least once or twice a year for a very long time to come. I am
looking down upon a group of mourners circling a casket,
weeping softly. I strain to get a glimpse of its occupant, but
the body is blocked from view. All at once, I am overwhelmed
by an ineffable sadness coupled with a sense of loss unlike
anything I have ever experienced before. Without seeing
the face of the deceased, I somehow know that I am the one
being mourned. Then, in the midst of taking pity on myself
and marking my own loss with a steady flow of tears that
leave my pillow damp the next morning, a consoling voice
whispers to me from out of the shadows: "He was a good
boy. He meant no harm to anyone. We'll miss him more than
any of us can say."
Teddy and four or five others, myself included, had been
baptized by the Rev. S. J. Wallace, who was nothing more to
us than a name in a musty register. We had gone through three
more ministers since then and were approaching adolescence,
in recognition of which our status in the church had been
elevated to that of 'preparatory members.' We would soon
be receiving special instructions from our minister prior to
declaring ourselves ready to assume the responsibilities of
full membership. This was to occur on a winter Sunday when
we would pledge our commitment to Christ before the entire
congregation. Afterwards, each of us would receive a King
James version of the Bible in which all the New Testament
words said to have been spoken by Jesus himself were

highlight in red, adding much to their gravity.

Months had passed, and the pain of Teddy's death,
like my troubling dream, had gradually faded. Moreover,
there was a new face in the pulpit, and my first impression
of Rev. Ralph Grote was not in the least encouraging. He
was scowling and saturnine, his sinister aspect heightened
by a five o'clock shadow I would come to recognize as
perpetual. Beneath his deeply creased forehead were a pair
of riveting blue-gray eyes and
the heaviest brows I had ever
seen. They reminded one of
impenetrable hedgerows and
would have done credit to
God Almighty himself.
Looks, as I was often
told in those days, could
be deceiving,
but there
was also the matter of Rev.
Ralph's
personal
life, if
indeed one could call it that.
The
confirmed
bachelor
immediately
became
the
number one topic of gossip
at the weekly meetings of the
Martha Circle and the Stitch
and Chatter Club. And that was just the tip of the iceberg, for
God only knew what the smug Lutherans were saying about
our new minister behind our backs. Somehow, the thought of
a local cleric living in a rambling parsonage all by himself
just wasn't seemly, what with no one to cook and to clean
for him, let alone answer the telephone and provide that
indispensable woman's touch that the Catholic clergy had
chosen to spurn ever since the Middle Ages.
To his credit, Rev. Ralph was as fastidious as he could
be when it came to appearances. In constant battle with
his shadowy countenance, he took to shaving twice a day.
The thick nails on his broad and powerful hands were well
scrubbed and manicured, his thinning hair neatly trimmed
and combed straight back, without a part. He trailed the then
most popular scents of the male toilette wherever he wentOld Spice, Aqua Velva, and Bryl Cream-leading
someone
to wisecrack that the parsonage might be doubling as a secret
barber shop. Never did he appear in public in anything less
than a well-pressed suit, a crisp white shirt, and a dark tie.
His black leather shoes shone with an intensity that would
have drawn raves from a Marine Corps drill sergeant, and in
winter he donned a gray fedora and giant galoshes that made
him look even taller and more formidable than his six-foot
frame.
It did not take long to discover that our new preacher was
a man oflarge appetites, especially when it came to all things
edible. The women of the church were soon comparing notes

"I had

a deeply
unsettling
dream that
would recur
at least once
or twice a
year. "

on Rev. Ralph's habit of showing up on their doorsteps only

minutes before lunch or dinner, just to pay his respects and
to see how things were going. Yes, he supposed he could stay
for soup and a sandwich, or an evening meal of roast beef
and mashed potatoes, but only if it was no bother. He was
practiced at broaching some matter having to do with the
church while simultaneously reaching for another helping
of fried chicken, hoping somehow that his hostess hadn't
noticed.
As the time drew near for my friends and I to profess
ourselves in public, I was beginning to have my doubts.
It wasn't that I was opposed to religion, but neither was I
drawn to it, and I certainly felt no elation at the prospect of
joining up. I had grown increasingly skeptical about many of
the stories in the Bible, including the preposterous account
of Noah's ark and the parting of the Red Sea at Moses's
command. The Second Coming was no less of an obstacle.
After all, if Jesus hadn't shown up again in the two thousand
years since his death, the chances seemed slim to me that
he ever would. Why had the major miracles ceased with
the New Testament, I wondered, and what made the death
of Jesus any more significant than the dying of millions of
other doomed beings? If God truly knows everything-past,
present, and future-then what was the point of prayer when
everything to come seemed preordained? As if that wasn't
enough to justify my hesitation, I was still bewildered by the
fate of poor Teddy, which to me was impossible to reconcile
with the image of a merciful Creator.
I revealed some, but not all, of these misgivings to my
Mother, who in turn relayed my concerns to Rev. Ralph. In
the supreme confidence that is faith, he assured her that what
her son was experiencing was not in the least unusual, that in
the end I would never wander far from the fold. If anything,
I was to be commended for taking such an important step
so seriously, which was more than most of my friends were
doing.
When Mother told me this and of how proud she was of
me, I felt ten times worse. Neither she nor Rev. Ralph had
any idea of just how far I had already strayed. At the same
time, I had no desire to hurt their feelings, much less kindle
the wrath of my Father, who would have dismissed my
reservations as childish nonsense of the worst kind. Thus, I
chose the path of least resistance, the path of the hypocrite,
and smiled back when a beaming Rev. Ralph handed me my
new Bible, with Jesus's words in red. With my parents and
the rest ofthe congregation looking on, I shook his hand and
returned to my seat in the front pew, knowing then what I
still know-now
that time is old. There will be no salvation
of the Christian kind; no offering myself up to the mystery;
no stumbling into grace.

JULY / AUGUST

2009

- AMERICAN

ATHEIST

27

The Problem with the

Contingency Argument

Shane Lambert

hile

it is common for theists to avoid

Eventually we run into a bit of a problem that all who

explaining their beliefs, theists that actually

bother with the debate in the first place must at some

defend them do not vary too widely from

point consider: Who begat the first set of parents? I don't

each other when they make their arguments. One typical

know enough about theology to comment on what exactly

defense of theism that all who participate in such debates

a Jesuit would say, but I know that most Christians would

will undoubtedly come across has been called 'The

claim that Adam and Eve were the proto-humans that

Argument from Contingency.' It is an integral part of

'begat' all others: two people who were simply created by

creationist 'theory' and will both be reviewed here and

the Judeo-Christian god.

also subsequently dismissed as arbitrary and groundless.

In the third edition of A Modern Introduction to

first human came from an ancestor species, a primate

Philosophy one finds a chapter entitled 'The Existence

ancestor who evolved from another species and so

of God-A

Debate. ' The opponents in the debate are two

on. Again, we bump into the same problem. Who begat

noted philosophers from the twentieth century: Bertrand

this ancestor species? If you can satisfy that question

Russell, a linguist, and Frederick Copleston, a Jesuit

(which requires ample skill and specialized education

priest. In the debate, Russell takes an agnostic position

in itself), then you will have to answer 'Where did that

while Copleston seems sure that a god's existence can be

species come from?' over and over again, as the begetting

deduced.

of each species that you introduce will be questioned.

Copleston is definitely to be commended, not because

So on and so forth we keep going back until we come to

he makes an airtight argument, but because he tries to

some really simple life forms or things that can potentially

appeal to reason, for it is a trademark of religious figures

spawn life, though non-living themselves. Depending

like priests to merely assert that their god exists by

on whom you ask, they are believed to have lived

appealing to their own authority. Worse yet, there have

near some bubbling lava or in some kind of "organic

been times in history when, an appeal to force (and not

'primeval soup'" as Richard Dawkins calls it in The Blind

reason) has been used as the only method of persuading

Watchmaker. Even if you have the training or knowledge

one's mind. Copleston's weakness is not that he is some

to get to this point in a debate with a 'true believer' that

kind of religious totalitarian but rather that he is a weak

is now full of skepticism, you still will not be off the

philosopher.

hook. You will then have to explain who or what begat

In his argument Copleston makes ~ simple set of

claims and it goes something like this: You, the reader,

28

The evolutionist, on the other hand, will say that the

the atoms that the first living things were made of: where
did the "organic 'primeval soup'" come from?

were 'begat' (to borrow a word from Genesis in the King

Here is where Copleston comes in again: "[S]ince

James Version of the bible) by your parents, and they

objects or events exist, and since no object of experience

themselves were begat from their parents. They, your

contains within itself the reason of its existence, this

grandparents, were begat from their parents, and in that

reason, the totality of objects, must have a reason external

sort of way we keep going back in time.

to itself." That 'reason' is a god, assumingly; after all,

AMERICAN

ATHEIST - JULy/AUGUST

2009

Copleston is taking a theist position in a debate about

precisely nothing, for it leaves unexplained the origin of

whether or not a god exists. Most physicists will explain

the Designer. You have to say something like 'God was

the existence of the universe in terms of the big bang

always there,' and if you allow yourself that kind of lazy

theory but even if you could do this, you still would not

way out, you might as well just say 'DNA was always

be off the hook with the likes of Copleston. Then you will

there,' or 'Life was always there,' and be done with it."

have to explain what begat the big bang: where did that
'point' come from?

Myself, I would say that matter has always existed,

whether spread out like it is now or in a tiny, dense

If you cannot explain this, then at this point in our

state. The difference between myself and the likes of

quest to understand our universe, you will have something

Copleston is that with each passing moment, nothing is

in common with everyone else, or at least nearly everyone

more clearly and directly verifiable than the existence

else. As Noam Chomsky points out in his essay entitled

of matter. If it's acceptable to state that something's

'Intelligent Design,'-the phrase "'I don't understand' has

existence is simply its essence, then say this about atoms

always been true in the sciences before understanding is

and matter, because we know that these exist. To question

reached." The theists, instead of assuming that you might

the existence of matter is to question your own physical

be weak on the subject, will fallaciously conclude that the

existence, and such is to redefine absurdity.

big bang could only come from their own respective god.

On the other hand, questioning the existence of 'a

In the same way, theists will both eliminate your

supernatural Designer' is perfectly reasonable, because

viewpoint as viable and arbitrarily conclude that their god

'invoking a supernatural Designer' into any debate is

exists (not some other religion's). When you get to this

arbitrary, groundless, and without reference to any known

point in the debate, you could then try to be as nitpicky as

fact. Furthermore, one should always disbelieve in the

they had been. You could ask them to explain where their

arbitrary and groundless until convincing evidence is

god came from, and that is where the arbitrary assertions

provided. Without this, one could be forced to believe in

will come in as they will simply state that their god's

an endless parade of ridiculous ideas.

existence is simply his (or her) essence. Or as Copleston,

the admirable but confused, puts it: "God is His own
sufficient reason; and He is not cause of Himself."
In The Blind Watchmaker, Dawkins has produced a
beautiful paragraph that shows the error in this type of
reasoning: "To explain the origin of the DNA/protein
machine by invoking a supernatural Designer is to explain

Shane Lambert is a Canadian freelance writer based out

of Edmonton, Alberta with a Bachelor

s of Arts

degree from the University of Alberta.

Rare and unusual memesfor the discriminating collector:

www.origin-ot-religions.org
Specializing in the finest memes- new memesmonthl~ ...
JULY / AUGUST

2009

- AMERICAN

ATHEIST

29

t birth, in Linz, Ober-Donau, Germany, I

was an Atheist, as all of us are when we are
born. The infant and young child have no
concept of a god until they are taught this by their
elders. My mother dutifully taught me to pray every
evening before going to bed. I have rather fond
memories of kneeling by my bed, hands folded,
earnestly talking to the Christian god (or so I thought)
asking forgiveness for perceived sins and asking for
protection from evil, but mostly for material things I
wanted. It felt good to talk to this god. I felt secure.
My father was half Jewish, a fact he hid from the
Nazi regime. We were lucky not to be carted off to
the camps because, according to the 1935 Nurnberg
laws, we would be eminently qualified to be part of
Germany's final solution for the' Jewish Problem.'

Austria's educational system required one hour

of religious instruction every school day. Around
fourth grade I began to suspect that my religious
devotion was not as it should be. At that time I made
my first communion, and it was necessary to attend
confession before communion. I did not wish to
reveal my sins to the priest, especially since I felt
uncomfortable by his questions about my habits.
I made up sins and still have a list of sins I never
committed for which I already have been forgiven. I
knew something was not quite right about this, but I
felt it was none of the pariest's business.
By the time I reached high school, my family
had immigrated to the USA. I became very interested
in other religions, fascinated by the similarities of
ancient religions and Christianity/Judaism. I voiced

ABORNAGAIN
Gosta Werner Iwasiuk
Nazi Germany was not Atheistic as is commonly
believed. Churches functioned throughout the
reign of the Reich. The Vatican may even have
been complicit or at least aware of the atrocities; it
certainly helped in the escape of prominent Nazis
at the end of the war, such as Adolph Eichman.
It failed to excommunicate prominent Catholic
Nazis, including Adolph Hitler, although it did
excommunicate Joseph Gobels for marrying outside
the faith, since Magda Gobels was Protestant. Let
it not be said that Pope Pius XII did not have his
standards.
In any case, I was a 'good Christian' child. My
father was a friend of the village priest who was also
his favorite chess partner in our small alpine village.
While in first grade, I even did a stint as an altar boy.
I particularly enjoyed carrying the sensor, the bronze
vessel in which incense burned. I would hand it to
the priest who would wave it, spreading the heavy,
sweet aroma throughout the church. Then he would
give it back to me to carry out. I could then wave it
around myself and create some 'holy smoke.' This
pleased me to no end.

30

AMERICAN

ATHEIST

. JULy/AUGUST

2009

my doubts at school and suddenly found myself in

debates with fellow students. They brought their
ministers to my home to drive some sense into me
and to 'save' me from eternal damnation. But the
more I learned about religion, the more unlikely and
untenable the stories appeared.
In college, I met other people who thought
like I thought, but I still believed that there was
something out there, something more powerful
than I. I transitioned to an Agnostic and took a
course in comparative religion; it became clear to
me that Christianity was a rerun and composite of
many preceding mythologies. Islam copied both the
Old and New Testaments. Jesus, if he ever existed
at all, was one of many 'messiah wannabes' of the
first Century who had a different message than the
others, a message suspiciously reminiscent of eastern
religious philosophy. Jesus preached pacifism, love,
and respect for others, very much like Buddhism and
Hinduism, much unlike the harsh and jealous god of
the Torah.
Medical School was next. I spent many an hour
in the cancer wards, learning my trade. The misery,

the pain, the suffering, the unfairness of illness, and

the smell of death gave me more reason to doubt
the 'glory of God' in which I so fervently believed
when I was that altar boy spreading holy smoke in
my village church in Austria.
When I was a senior medical student, I met a
young woman who translated for Spanish speakers.
She was one step further than I in the evolution
toward Atheism; her disappointment in religion
had come much earlier than mine. She was raised
Methodist in a small Wisconsin town where she
attended Sunday school every week. Her father
was that town's doctor. She had a snow white cat,
ironically named Blood Clot (remember she was a
doctor's daughter).
The cat suddenly died one day. At age eight, the
young girl was introduced to death and she took it
very hard. Being a good Christian, she reconciled
herself to this loss, because she would reunite with
Blood Clot at some future time in heaven. When the
Sunday school teacher asked her, "Why so glum this
morning?" she explained the sad news of the eat's
passing and that she was looking forward to seeing
him again in heaven. "Don't you know that cats
don't go to heaven!" she screamed. The tears welled
up in the little girl's eyes; she would never see her
friend again.
That set her young brain into motion. She
realized then that the whole structure of a god,
heaven, hell, the afterlife, and all those bible stories
are fiction. That was the end of Christianity for my
future wife. Her influence on me nudged me closer
to the realization that the same god that doesn't let
cats into heaven is the same god that demanded
Abraham sacrifice his son on the altar, the same god
who sacrificed his only son on the cross, and the
same god that lets little infants roast in hell because
they were not baptized. She rejected this god, and
eventually, so did 1.
Not long ago, I revisited Salzburg, Austria. I
have a fondness for that city, I suppose, because I
hail from there and my favorite composer, Wolfgang
Amadeus Mozart, was born and lived there. I stayed
in the old part of town, in the Judengasse, at the
Hotel Alt Stadt. The hotel is less than a block from
the Salzburg Dom Cathedral, this version dating
back to 1611. On Sunday morning, very early when
the bells started tolling to call the faithful to come
for worship, I awoke, decided to take a little walk,
and found myself at the cathedral's doorsteps. I was
still an Agnostic, yet I was inexorably drawn to open
the giant wooden doors and walked in. "What harm
could there be in that?" I asked myself.

The place was jam-packed with believers. The

pungent smoke from the incense permeated the air.
Outside the sun had risen, its bright rays shining
through the stained glass windows. The multicolored
streams of light pierced the smoke-laden baroque
chamber. It was as if the god's messengers were
preparing the way for the god to descend from
heaven.
As I looked toward the organ, the same organ
where Mozart sat some two hundred fifty years ago,
its pipes started to drone, and the choir launched
into the glorious and appropriately named "Gloria
in Excelsis Deo" from Mozart's C-Minor Mass.
Suddenly, quite unexpectedly, I felt my face flush,
my heart pound, and tears well up from nowhere. It
was the same feeling I had experienced when I was
an altar boy back in the alpine village where I carried
the incense urn. This feeling came from some primal
part of the brain, a part dealing with emotion and
not reason. I felt a longing to be that little boy again,
to know that I was safe and protected, that a very
powerful divine being cared just for me and would
answer my prayers. IfI hadn't had my wits about me,
I could have reverted to that stage in my life of being
happily ignorant and dependent on the supernatural.
But I wiped off the tears, shook my head, and reality
returned. I can see now how another person who
came to that church could become befuddled.
I fully understand this faith in trust and
goodness. It is very comforting to know, with
certainty, that Jesus loves you and will accompany
you through trials and tribulations until your final
reward in heaven. There is only one problem with it;
it is fiction. Wishing it were true will not make it so.
I must admit that in my ministrations as a physician
I have, in my Deist days, used this mystical feeling
to comfort the sick, the dying, and their families. It
works! Unfortunately it is also a falsehood, a lie.
Ultimately all lies come back to haunt us; ultimately
lies do harm.

Gosta Werner Iwasiuk is the author of

The Jesus Gene.

atheists.org

JULy/AUGUST

2009

- AMERICAN

ATHEIST

31

j'

Religion 101:
Final Exam, Part 1
by Terrence Kaye
1) Which of the following is the most compelling
evidence for the existence of an intelligent and loving
Designer?
A. The girl born in Egypt with two functioning heads
B. The screams of a baby seal as it is tom apart by a
shark
C. The superiority of the octopus eyeball to the human
D. A Caribbean sunset
2) A Christian couple has just returned from their fiftieth
anniversary celebration, when suddenly the husband falls
to the ground, clutching his chest. Assuming the morally
proper action is to try to save his life, what is the most
morally proper action the wife could take?
A.
B.
C.
D.

Ca1l911
Put him in the car and race to the hospital herself
Administer CPR
Fall on her knees and pray to the Lord to spare his
life

3) You are a product tester and frequently bring your work

home. Yesterday, while dressed in a flame-resistant suit
(up to 3,000 degrees) and carrying the latest model fire
extinguisher, you discovered your neighbor's house on fire.
As the flames quickly spread, you stood by and watched the
family perish. Which of the following best describes your
behavior?
A.
B.
C.
D.

All-powerful
All-knowing
All-loving
Mysterious

4) One day while jogging in the park, you see a maniac

with a butcher knife about to attack a six-year old girl.
What should you do?
A. Grab the nearest rock and club the attacker
B. Call the police on your cell phone
C. Yell "POLICE!" and run toward the attacker in a
threatening manner
D. Calmly walk away, because God works in
mysterious ways, and what appears "evil" to our
finite human mind, may in fact be part of a vaster
plan in God's infinite mind, so it's best not to
interfere

32

AMERICAN

ATHEIST

JULY / AUGUST

2009

The author gratefully acknowledges the inspiration

provided by E. T. Babinski, Dan Barker, George Carlin,
Richard Dawkins,. Sam Harris, Judith Hayes, James
Haught, Robert Ingersoll, Adam Lee, John Stuart Mill,
Pablo Neruda, Blaise Pascal, Seneca. Julia Sweeney.
Jethro Tull, Mark Twain. and Mark Vuletic.
5) You are a loving family man who volunteers as a Big
Brother and also at the local hospice when not working as
the director of the community food bank. You awaken this
morning to discover the global news media ablaze with the
first-ever, easily understood, irrefutable scientific proof that
there is no god. What will you probably do?
A.
B.
C.
D.

Quit your job and become a full-time rapist

Abandon your family and go on a murder rampage
Become a professional burglar
Continue your life pretty much as usual

6) Since we can never "know" whether or not a god exists

- it is fundamentally a matter of "faith" - it's best to be a
believer since you have nothing to lose, but everything to
lose if your disbelief is incorrect. Keeping in mind that the
fate of your soul depends on the right choice, in which god
should you place your belief? For extra credit, include a
brief essay justifying your choice, along with the reasons
why you reject the other three.
A.
B.
C.
D.

Zeus
Odin
Vishnu
The Holy Trinity

7) You are the Creator of the universe. Your chosen people

are a tribe of nomadic herdsmen, presently in bondage on
one of the millions of your planets. Their ruler is being
quite obstinate. Keeping in mind that you possess not only
infinite power but also infinite love, your best course of
action would be to:
A. Cause the ruler to drop dead of a heart attack
B. Cause the ruler to fall off a cliff
C. Visit the ruler in a dream and persuade him to let
your people go
D. Slaughter a great number of innocent babies who
had nothing to do with the ruler's policies

8) You are a Starfleet Federation explorer in the process of

cataloging two newly discovered planets. The majority of
the inhabitants of each planet believe in a deity, but they
are two different deities. Deity "X" is said to be not only
all-powerful, all-loving, and all-knowing, but the designer
of a marvelously complex and ordered world. Deity "Y" is
said to be indifferent, absent, unconcerned with the affairs
of his planet, and some even say evil. Which god rules over
which planet?

10) As we all know, there is only one true religion.

What is the one true religion in each ofthe following
circumstances?

Planet A: Has apparently achieved a state of advanced

benign equilibrium in which there are no viruses or
diseases, and only a very small number of natural disasters,
which, when they do strike, always eliminate only the
sinful and evil. The inhabitants, both plant and animal, have
learned to maintain their existence through photosynthesis,
and thus do not have to kill and eat each other in order
to survive. There are no "birth defects"; every inhabitant
comes into existence perfectly formed and equipped for a
long and productive life.

11) Although you are new at golf, you have just hit a
beautiful 200-yard drive and your ball has landed on a
blade of grass near the cup at Hole 3. The green contains
ten million blades of grass. The odds of your ball landing
on that blade of grass are 9,999,999 to one against, too
improbable to have happened by mere chance. What's the
explanation?

DeityX __
DeityY

A
B.
C.
D.

A
B.
C.
D.

You
You
You
You

are
are
are
are

born
born
born
born

in
in
in
in

Karnak in 3000 B.C.

Bombay in 300 B.C.
Baghdad in 900 A.D.
Mexico City in 1956 AD.

The wind guided it

Your muscles guided it
There is no need for an explanation
You consciously designed your shot to land on that
particular blade

12) Which ofthe following is most likely to be true; why?

Planet B: Adorned with many examples of beauty and
order, it is also constantly beset by hurricanes, earthquakes,
tsunamis, floods, volcanoes, lightning bolts, viruses,
disfiguring diseases, parasites, leeches, flies, cropdestroying pests and many other phenomena which afflict
both the innocent and the evil. Every life form on the planet
can only sustain its existence through the destruction and
consumption of other life forms. Some of the inhabitants
are born with a crippling condition called a "birth defect"
which condemns them to living extremely limited, short or
painful lives.

Romulus was the son of a god, born to a mortal

human virgin
B. Dionysus turned water into wine
C. Apollonius of Tyana raised a girl from the dead
D. Jesus Christ was the son of God, born to a mortal
virgin, turned water into wine, and raised a man
from the dead

DeityX __
DeityY __
9) What is the number of children born without arms or legs
that have been miraculously restored by a visit to the shrine
at Lourdes, France?
A
B.
C.
D.

Too many to count

Over 1,000
Several dozen
Zero, but only because their faith was not strong
enough

JULy/AUGUST

2009

AMERICAN

ATHEIST

33

Is your local or national group interested

in affiliating with American Atheists? If
so, please contact Blair Scott, National
Affiliate Director, at bscott@atheists.org
or call him at (256) 701-6265.
Atheists & Agnostics
Group of Ross moor
Web: rossmooratheists.info
@: rgolden272@comcast.net
3612 Rossmoor Parkway #4, Walnut
Creek, CA 94595
(925) 933-3133

ALABAMA
Birmingham Atheists
Web: atheists.meetup.comI132
@: atheists-132@meetup.com
Florence United Nontheists
Web: FlorenceFreethought.org
@: FlorenceFUN@gmail.com
Montgomery Area Freethought
Association
Web: montgomeryfreethought.org
@: organizers@montgomeryfreethought.
org
North Alabama Freethought Association
Web: thenafa.org
@: nafa@thenafa.org
PO Box 41, Ryland, AL 35767-0041
ALASKA
Anchorage Atheists
Web: http://meetup.com/
anchorageatheists
@: alaskanmetal@yahoo.com
205 E Diamond Blvd, # 197, Anchorage,
AK 99515
(907) 250-9565
ARIZONA
Tucson Atheists
Web: atheists.meetup.comJ69
@: AZAtheist@cox.net
9114 E Wolfberry St, Tucson, AZ 85747
(520) 664-0722
CALIFORNIA
Agnostic & Atheist Student Association
Web: daviswiki.orglagasa
@: ccchao@ucdavis.edu
Mail: Box#96.UCDavis.Davis.CA
95616
Atheist Coalition of San Diego
Web: atheistcoalition.org
@: info@atheistcoalition.org
PO Box 4786,
San Diego, CA 92164-4786
(619) 342-7388

34

AMERICAN

ATHEIST

- JULy/AUGUST

2009

Atheists & Freethinkers of

Contra Costa County
Web: contracostaatheists.com
@: thesugarboy@sbcglobal.net
5486 Haussner Drive, Concord, CA
94521
(925) 672-7243
Atheists of Silicon Valley
Web: godlessgeeks.com
@: Contact via Web Page
Central Valley Alliance
of Atheists and Skeptics
Web: cvaas.org
@: info@cvaas.org
CVAAS, c/o Richard Moore, 920 E.
Cambridge Ave, Fresno, CA 93704
(559) 892-0102
East Bay Atheists
Web: eastbayatheists.org
@: info@eastbayatheists.org
Ph: (510) 222-7580
Humanist Society of Santa Barbara
Web: santabarbarahumanists.org
@: President@SantaBarbaraHumanists.
org
PO Box 30232, Santa Barbara, CA
93130
Orange County Atheists
Web: OCAtheists.com
@: contact@OCAtheists.com
PO Box 10541, Santa Ana, CA 92711

(14) 478-8457
San Francisco Atheists
Web: sfatheists.com
@: info@sfatheists.com
900 Bush Street, #210, San Francisco,
CA 94109
(415) 771-9872

Santa Cruz Atheists

Web: santacruzatheists.org
@: howard@burman.net
(831) 335-8231
Shasta Atheists & Freethinkers
@: shasta@atheistalliance.org
PO Box 1544,
Shasta Lake City, CA 96019
(530) 275-4626
COLORADO
Atheists and Freethinkers of Denver
Web: atheistsofdenver.org
@: athofden@onebox.com
PO Box 22174, Denver, CO 80222
(303) 285-3482 x7118
Boulder Atheists
Web: boulderatheists.org
@: info@BoulderAtheists.org
PO Box 21365, Boulder, CO 80308
(303) 258-3974
Metro State Atheists
Web: metrostateatheists. wordpress.com
@: metroatheists@hotrnai.com
900 Auraria Pkwy, Denver, CO 80204
(720) 936-6505
Western Colorado Atheists
@: WesternColoradoAtheists@yahoo.
com
PO Box 1434,
Grand Junction, CO 81502
(970) 263-9199
CONNECTICUT
Atheist Humanist Society of CT and R1
Web: atheisthumanist.org
@: cmojica53@yahoo.com
PO Box 5, East Lyme, CT 06333
(860) 334-6769
Connecticut Valley Atheists
Web: cvatheists.org
@: info@cvatheists.org
650 Bolton Road, Vernon, CT 06066
(860) 454-8301

FLORIDA
Florida Atheists & Secular Humanists
**Affiliate ofthe Year, 2008**
Web: freethoughtfiorida.com
@: Browardatheists@mac.com
PO Box 246743, Pembroke Pines, FL
33024
Gator Freethought (UF)
Web: gatorfreethought.org
@: gatorfreethought@gmail.com
Rebirth of Reason in Florida
Web: rebirthofreason.comIFlorida
@: LutherSetzer@yahoo.com
Saint Petersburg Atheists
Web: atheists.meetup.comJ209
@: easy8@TampaBay.rr.com
PO Box 22304, Saint Petersburg, FL
33742-2304
(727) 577-9150
South Lake Atheists and Freethinkers
Web: atheists.meetup.comJ655
@: jbraga@cfl.rr.com
13234 Moonflower Ct,
Clermont, FL 34711

IOWA
Iowa Secularists
Web: iowasecularist.org
@: contact@iowasecularist.org
PO Box 883, Iowa City, IA 52244
Sioux land Atheists
Web: siouxlandatheists.org
@: siouxland atheists@yahoo.com
(712) 212-5438
KANSAS
Heartland Humanists
Web: heartlandhumanists.org
@: JoAnn@freethinker.org
PO Box 24022, Shawnee Mission, KS
66283
(913) 839-1099
Individuals For Freethought
Web: k-state.edu/freethought
@: freethought@k-state.edu
c/o Office of Student Activities, Kansas
State University, 809 K-State Union,
Ground Floor, Manhattan, KS 66506
Kansas Freethought Society
Web: atheists.meetup.comJ642
@: dfpeters01@gmaiLcom
201 N Harrison St, Spring Hill, KS 66083
(913) 488-6508

GEORGIA
Atlanta Freethought Society
Web: atlantafreethought.org
@: afs@atlantafreethought.org
4775 N Church Lane, Smyrna, GA
30080-7224

KC FreeThinkers
Web: kcfreethinkers.org
@: kcfreethinkers@gmail.com
(913) 894-4024

IDAHO
Idaho Atheists
Web: idahoatheists.org
@: MailBag@idahoatheists.org
PO Box 204, Boise, ID 83701-0204
(208) 455-9222

Miami County Kansas Freethinkers

Web: atbeists.meetup.comI733
@: dfpetersOl@gmail.com
201 N. Harrison St,
Spring Hill, KS 66083
(913) 488-6508

ILLINOIS
Bradley Atheists
@: PTurack@Bradley.edu
912 N Elmwood Ave, Heitz Hall, Rm
112, Peoria, IL 61606
(309) 677-1421

LOUISIANA
New Orleans Secular
Humanist Association
Web: nosha.secularhumanism.ner
330 Julia St, #233, New Orleans, LA
70130-3681
(504) 282-5459

IWU Atheist, Agnostic, and NonReligious

Web: facebook.com/group.
php?gid=5558627959
@: jschmitt@iwu.edu
Illinois Wesleyan University 13 12 Park
St., Bloomington, IL 61701

MARYLAND
Freethinkers Union at McDaniel College
@: mtrn007@mcdanieLedu
2 College Hill, Westminster, MD 21157
(631) 245-2773

MASSACHUSETTS
American University Rationalists &
Atheists
Web: facebook.comJgroup.
php?gid=34367344446
@: aura@american.edu
4400 Massachusetts Ave. NW, Mary
Graydon Center 271,
Washington, DC 20016
(202) 885-3390
Atheists of Greater Lowell
@: stevieb@verizonmai1.com
50 Danforth Rd., Tyngsboro, MA 01879
(978) 394-8729
Boston Atheists
Web: bostonatheists.org
@: BostonAtheists@gmaiLcom
95 Melville Avenue, Boston MA 02124
(617) 935-4951
MICHIGAN
Michigan Atheists
Web: michiganatheists.org
@: amarie@atheists.org
PO Box 0025,
Allen Park, M148101-0025
(313) 938-5960
Mid Michigan Atheists and Humanists
Web: mmah.org
@: Jim@MMAH.org
(517) 750-3887
MINNESOTA
Minnesota Atheists
Web: rnnatheists.org
@: info@mnatheists.org
PO Box 6261,
Minneapolis, MN 55406-0261
(612) 588-7031
St. Olaf Agnostic and Atheist Society
Web: stolaf.edu/orgs/aas
@: aas@stolaf.edu
1500 St. Olaf Ave, Northfield, MN
55057
(507) 646-2879
MISSISSIPPI
Great Southern Humanist Society
Web: humanism.meetup.comJ164
@: HumanistFamilies@hotmaiLcom
2069 Juniper Dr, Biloxi, MS 39532
228-385-1921

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Mid-South Humanist Society

Web: midsouth-humanist-society.org
@: Contact via Web Page

Long Island Secular Humanists

@: LISecHum@aol.com
PO Box 119, Greenlawn, NY 11740

MISSOURI
Columbia Atheists
Web: meetup.com/The-ColumbiaAtheists-Meetup-Group
@: gblammers@gmail.com
509 N William, Columbia, MO 65201

New York City Atheists

Web: nyc-atheists.org
@: info@NYC-Atheists.org
Cooper Station, PO Box 93,
New York, NY 10276
(212) 330-6749

Community of Reason
Web: CommunityOfReason.net
@: info@communityofreason.net
5019 State Line Rd,
Kansas City, MO 64112-1156
(816) 561-1866

Science Club of Long Island

Web: sciencecluboflongisland.com
@: presidentscienceclubofli@verizon.net
12 Andover Place,
Huntington, NY 11743
(631)271-2806

Joplin Freethinkers
Web: joplinfreethinkers.org
@: scott.cragin@gmail.com

NORTH CAROLINA
Charlotte Atheists & Agnostics
Web: CharlotteAtheists.com
@: info@CharlotteAtheists.com

Rationalist Society of St. Louis

Web: rssl.org
@: info@rssl.org
PO Box 300031, St. Louis, MO 63130
NEBRASKA
Omaha Atheists
Web: omahaatheists.org
@: info@omahaatheists.org
NEVADA
Las Vegas Freethought Society
Web: lvfs.org
@: lasvegasfreethought@gmail.com
PO Box 19146,
Las Vegas, NV 89123-0146

OHIO
Free Inquiry Group, Inc.
Web: gofigger.org
@: figinfo@gofigger.org
PO Box 53174, Cincinnati, OH 45253
Humanist Community of Central Ohio
Web: hcco.org
@: infO@hcco.org
PO Box 141373, Columbus, OH 43214
(614) 470-0811
OKLAHOMA
Oklahoma Atheists
Web: OklahomaAtheists.info
@: aok@oklahomaatheists.info

NEW JERSEY
New Jersey Humanist Network
Web: NJHN.org
@: njlm@rcn.com
PO Box 8212,
Somerville, NJ 08876-8212
(732) 666-1716

PENNSYLVANIA
Atheist Station
Web: atheiststation.org
@: info@atheiststation.org
PO Box 1623, Altoona, PA 16603
(814) 949-7149.

NEW YORK

Central Susquehanna Valley Freethought

Web: meetup.com/Central-susquehannavalley -freethought
@: jehovahgodofgaps@gmail.com
1301 Market St, Apt 2,
Sunbury, PA 17801
(570) 809-5353

Freethinkers of Upstate New York

Web: funygroup.org
@: director@funygroup.org
(315) 245-3596
Hudson Valley Humanists
Web: hudsonvalley.humanists.net
@: HVHumans@yahoo.com
PO Box 961, Saugerties, NY 12477
(845) 247-0098

36

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ATHEIST

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Northeast Pennsylvania
Freetbought Society
Web: atheists.meetup.coml622
@: alrgc@yahoo.com
PO Box 2501, Wilkes-Barre, PA 18703
(570) 793-1837
PA Nonbelievers
Web: panonbelievers.org
@: PANonbelievers@aol.com
45 Gravel Hill ReI,
Mount Wolf, PA 17347
(717) 266-13 57
RHODE ISLAND
Rhode Island Atheist Society
Web: riatheist.com
@: info@riatheist.com
PO Box 16034,
East Providence, RI 02916
SOUTH CAROLINA
Secular Humanists of Lowcountry
Web: lowcountry.humanists.net
@: shl@lowcountry.humanists.net
PO Box 32256, Charleston, SC 29417
TENNESSEE
Chattanooga Freethought Association
Web: chattanoogafreethoughtassociation.
com
@: webmaster@
chattanoogafreethoughtassociation.com
6316 Shore Manor Ln, Cbattanooga, TN
37416
Memphis Freethought Alliance
Web: memphisfreethought.com
@: memphisfreethought@yahoo.com
PO Box 3271, Cordova, TN 38088
Nashville Secular Life
Web: atheists.meetup.coml699
707 Cynthia Ct, Mt. Juliet, TN 37122
(865) 567-6892
Rationalists of East Tennessee
Web: rationalists.org
@: info@rationalists.org
PO Box 51634, Knoxville, TN 37950
(865) 539-3006

TEXAS
AtheistCommunity o~AustiJ1.
Web: atheist-community.org
@: info@atbeist-community.org
~O Box 3798, Austin, TX 78764
(512) 371-2911

Seattle Atheists
Web: Seattle,Mheists.org
@: seattleatheists@seattleatbeists.org
11008 NE 140th St, Kirkland, WA 98034
(206) 729-0327

WISCONSIN
Houston Atheists Meetup
Web: meetup.com/Houston-Atheists
@: houstonatheistsmeetup@yahoo.com
Metroplex Atheists
Web: metroplexatheists.org
@: Terry@MetroplexAtheists.org
1332.Martin Ct, Grapevine, Texas 76051
(817) 421-3879
UTAH
Atheists of Utah
Web: atbeistsofutah.org
@: joel@atbeistsofutah.org
2071. Westminster Ave,
Salt Lake City, UT 84108
(801) 879-3245
Salt Lake Valley Atheists
Web: atheists-of-utah.org
@: joeljoel@usa.net
2071 WestminsterAve,
Salt Lake City, UT 84] 08
(801) 467-0458

VIRGINIA
Beltway Atheists
Web: meetup.com/beltwayatheists
@: atheists-530@meetup.com
PO Box 774, Leesburg, VA 20176
(703) 433-2464

Southeast Wisconsin FreeThinkers

Web: swiftwisconsin.org
@: humanist@ameriteclLnet
PO Box 3,.Mequon, Wl53092

NATIONAL ORGANIZATIONS
Atheist Nexus
Web: atheistnexus.org
@: atheistuexus@gmail.co11.l,
PO Box 387, Grayson, GA30017
Atheists for Human Rights
Web: atheistsforhumanrights.org
@: communications@
atheistsforbumanrights.org
5146 Newton Ave,
Minneapolisa~55430-3459
(612) 529-1200
AtheistS United for a Rational America
Web: rationalamerica.com
@: rationality.rules@gmail.com
PO Box 2073, Iowa City, IA 52244-2073
(319) 400-5328
Military .(\.ssoc. of
Atheists & Freethinkers
Web: maaf.info
@: Community@maaf.info
519 Somerville Ave,PMB 200,
Somerville, MA 02143

Rational Response Squad

at GeorgeMason
Web: myspace.comlrrs@gmu
@: gmu@secularstudents.org
Rational Response Sqllad~ GMU Student Activities Office, MSN 2D3;
4400 University Dr, Fairfax, VA 22030
(202) 285-3298

WASffiNGTON
Freethinkers United Network
Web: freethinkersunirednetworlccom
wendita99@hotmail.com
3854 139thAve SE, Bellevue, WA 98006
(425) 269-9108

JULy/AUGUST

2009

- AMERICAN

ATHEIST

3~

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AIMS & PURPOSES

American Atheists, Inc. is a nonprofit, nonpolitical, educational organization dedicated to the complete
and absolute separation of state and church, accepting the explanation of Thomas Jefferson that the First
Amendment to the Constitution of the United States was meant to create a "wall of separation"
between state and church.

American Atheists is organized:

To stimulate and promote freedom of thought and inquiry concerning
religious beliefs, creeds, dogmas, tenets, rituals, and practices;
To collect and disseminate information, data, and literature on all religions
and promote a more thorough understanding of them, their origins, and their histories;
To advocate, labor for, and promote in all lawful ways the complete and absolute
separation of state and church;
To act as a "watchdog" to challenge any attempted breach of the wall of separation
between state and church;
To advocate, labor for, and promote in all lawful ways the establishment and
maintenance of a thoroughly secular system of education available to all;
To encourage the development and public acceptance of a humane ethical system
stressing the mutual sympathy, understanding, and interdependence of all people and
the corresponding responsibility of each individual in relation to society;
To develop and propagate a social philosophy in which humankind is central
and must itself be the source of strength, progress, and ideals for the well-being
happiness of humanity;

and

To promote the study of the arts and sciences and of all problems affecting the
maintenance, perpetuation, and enrichment of human (and other) life; and
To engage in such social, educational, legal, and cultural activity as will be useful
and beneficial to the members of American Atheists and to society as a whole.

DEFINITIONS
Atheism is the comprehensive world view of persons who are free from theism and have freed themselves of supernatural beliefs altogether. It is predicated
on ancient Greek Materialism.
Atheism involves the mental attitude that unreservedly accepts the supremacy of reason and aims at establishing a life-style and ethical
outlook verifiable by experience and the scientific method, independent of all arbitrary assumptions of authority and creeds.
Materialism declares that the cosmos is devoid of immanent conscious purpose; that it is governed by its own inherent, immutable, and impersonal laws;
that there is no supernatural interference in human life; that humankind, finding the resources within themselves, can and must create their own destiny. It
teaches that we must prize our life on earth and strive always to improve it. It holds that human beings are capable of creating a social system based on
reason and justice. Materialism's "faith" is in humankind and their ability to transform the world culture by their own efforts. This is a commitment that is,
in its very essence, life-asserting. It considers the struggle for progress as a moral obligation that is impossible without noble ideas that inspire us to bold,
creative works.
Materialism holds that our potential for good and more fulfilling cultural development is, for all practical purposes, unlimited.

INFORMATION ABOUT TAX DEDUCTIONS

IRS rules state that the tax-deductible portion of membership dues can be found by subtracting the fair-market value of any goods or services that you
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Also, any donations that you make IN ADDITION TO your membership dues are fully tax-deductible.