To Survive or Thrive?

by Nathan & Aline

Have you ever wondered why humanity lives in a perpetual state of survival, and why it is
so difficult to get ahead and thrive? Why is it that certain people are placed as authorities
over us, and that we need their permission to enjoy life? Why do we over consume? Why
are we so competitive? If so, you may benefit from reading on
The only thing that makes us see another person as an authority over us is our neediness
for that which we believe they have and we lack, and this neediness causes separation
between us and them. Instead of being in desire, which is a place of thriving,
interdependence, and creativity, in duality we are in need for our survival, which is
translated down into how we define love, affection, attention, money, sex, intimacy, and
more. Humanity was tricked out of having such things and into needing them by a brilliant
sleight of hand, we shifted our focus from desiring the being, purpose, or relationship, to
perceiving the fruit of such relationships as being the connector that unites beings and
energies
together
in
relationship,
and
then
focussing on it instead.
Things such as sex or money
should be the result of the
relationship, and not the
intimate glue that binds it
together.
For example, if I am already
connected to my wife and I
take my desire off of her and
place it onto the fruit of our
relationship instead, such as
sex, I become needy for sex
and
have
thus
caused
separation between the two of
us. In this way, we lose the
amazing sex we had and are
now subject to the game of
dominance and submission, as my wife now becomes the authority and holds control over
my sexualityall because I took my eyes off of her and placed them onto the fruit of our
relationship instead. Since she (the external representation of my feminine) now holds the

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keys to my sexuality, I will perpetually seek her permission to enjoy sex, which she may
then resist, even if she grudgingly gives in to my needs. Women may also embrace the role
of sexual gatekeeper, and act as either a healer, prostitute, or seductress, to either benefit
others or leverage their position for selfish gain.
When my wife takes her eyes off of me and instead places them on her need for me to
understand her emotional need for security, and I become the gatekeeper to those needs
being met, and I may also resist her, because it is a suffocating responsibility for me to
bear. Men may also embrace the role of emotional gatekeeper, acting as either a healer,
hero, or tyrant, to either benefit others or leverage their position for selfish gain. In this
scenario, she will either need to find another woman to gossip and confide in, or another
sexual partner that she can gain emotional support from, to be able to feel full enough to
continue on. This is a never ending cycle of leaning on others to fill the lack and neediness
that this errant belief system has caused.
Because a woman is seen as the gatekeeper and authority around sex, when a woman is
viewed by a man, she is measured for her capacity to provide sexual pleasure in
comparison to other gatekeepers. Her worth is not valued for the fullness of who she is,
but just for her sexual capacity and ability to satisfy his needs. This also explains why
women are so replaceable and interchangeable to men, and why a man can be so easily
replaced by another who is able to provide greater financial security to a woman. From
this we can see that the patriarchal system is actually one where the feminine is the sexual
authority, and the masculine is the emotional and financial authority.
This pattern repeats itself in other relationships as well, for in the case of money, it has
become the needed component for me to live my lifes purpose, but all that is actually
needed is for me to live my passion and focus on the relationship between me, my business,
and the public that I am serving. This switch from focusing on my life purpose and
passions to wanting a particular financial outcome, is the switch from desire to need, which
then puts me in a space of needing to find an authority (gatekeeper) to give me permission
to have money, such as a boss, clients, etc. However, I can act also as the authority with my
clients, employees, and constituents, knowing that they must come to me to have their
needs met, but for a pricegive me your money and I will grant your needs with my
products or services, I make myself the gatekeeper to your perceived happiness.
This pattern also relates to the masculine freedom wound and the feminines safety wound,
as men want the freedom to meet their sexual neediness, which is much more than their
wives or girlfriends can possibly supply to them, and they also want freedom from their
feminines emotional neediness, which also feels overwhelming. While women want the

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security that their men will provide for their emotional and physical needs (experienced as
romance), and to feel safe from the pain that their men inflict on them when they run off in
their pursuit of sexual and emotional freedom. The freedom wound is pleasure oriented,
needing the freedom to find their perceived lack of pleasure, while the security wound is
pain oriented, having an attachment to both feeling and avoiding pain, for feeling the pain
can be used to be seen by their man, and avoiding pain can be the reason to get their man
to stop their selfish pursuit of pleasure. Pleasure and pain are two sides of the same coin
however, they are the duality split of having a joyful experience and state of being.
Dependence is the modus operandi of the separation and neediness system, and those that
might appear to be independent really are not, as they are just working around their
dependence through rejecting needy people, or through becoming a drug dealer of the
various needs. Needy people go out of the way to supply the needs of independent people
because they believe that they hold the secret to satisfying their needs, but they also give
away their power because of the rejection they receive from the independent ones. A
dependent persons need for approval and to avoid rejection is powerful; rejection is the
easiest way to hustle somebody out of their energy, money, emotional support, sex, or
more. Independent people are perceived as the authorities in life, and dependent people
are those that must be obedient to the authorities in order to even have the hope of having
some of their needs met.
A dependent person can become an authority figure through dominating other perceived
authorities, thus turning the tables in the situation, and there are many forms of
domination, from rape, manipulation, aggressiveness, assertiveness, and even passivity. A
revolution is when a group of people unite in their neediness to overthrow the perceived
source of their lack, but all they are doing is ascending the throne of domination to become
an authority, creating a new set of haves and have nots. On an individual level, when a
man rapes a woman, he is stealing from, and using violence to dominate a perceived
authority figure, because he is tired of being resisted and rejected by her, for he perceives
that she has what he needs; this is sad but true.
However, interdependence is when a person is not needy, because they are not focusing or
attached to the results of a relationship, but are instead connected to a being or purpose
that they desire to be with. When this happens, they will automatically experience having
their needs met by the relationship, and in ways that they couldn't have dreamed possible,
as the relationship supplies all of the love, affection, attention, money, sex, intimacy, and
more, than an individual could ever want or need.

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Without this limiting perception loop going on, competition is impossible, because people
are fighting over the fruits, which is seen as the permission slip to gain the relationship,
instead of having the relationship which causes the fruits to growthe cart has been placed
before the horse. This pattern also perpetuates the belief in limited resources, as it sees
scarcity where no lack actually exists, for people are looking in the wrong place for their
abundance; they are looking at the fruits instead of their relationships. Consumerism and
over consumption is an additional consequence of giving away personal power in this
manner, for people are afraid of missing out on what should be their birthright, which
triggers a panicked hoarding and consuming of sexual and financial resources; lust and
greed.
The over emphasis being placed on sex, money, power, romance, fame, dominance,
submission, authority, survival, war, lack of resources, poverty, starvation, fear,
divisiveness, and more is reinforced through the governments, schools, TV, music, movies,
commercials, video games, media outlets, and the rest of the entertainment industry, is
done to keep the general public looking in the wrong places for their abundance and
satisfaction. This steering of humanity to focus on the fruits of relationships rather than on
the sanctity of relationship has been a highly successful campaign to keep us from our true
creativity and personal power.
Emotional attachment is the healthy ability to connect to other beings within a
relationship, which is something we enhance when we let go of our attachment to
particular outcomes, such as money or sex. Fruitful results come naturally when we have
the capacity to emotionally attach, but are blocked by any attachments that we may have to
expectations and outcomes. To break free from this cycle we must disconnect from our
attachments to that which we think we need, and die to the expectation that we will ever
receive them again, and in this way, we can shift our focus back to that which truly matters,
our relationships. In the Divine Pollination Hive, we use the Emotional Freedom
Techniques (EFT), also known as tapping, to alter our limiting patterns, integrate our
shadows, and let go of unhealthy attachments; it has proven to be an invaluable tool on our
path back to unity.
Our neediness and separation are the after effects of focussing on the results of a
relationship rather than on the relationship itself, it is attempting to make the fruits of
being connected the connector between those in a relationship. Conversely, when a
relationship, and those within it, are the primary focus, all needs dissolve, lacks are filled,
and individuals thrive, for the relationship provides more than enough fruits for them to
taste together; and in this state of being and doing, the two are again united as the One.

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