English Language Center Brigham Young University

Process Analysis Essay

How to get rid of a roommate without committing a crime

Writing Class AA Section 2

Mrs. Courtney Bodily
Process Analysis Essay - Final Draft
December 05, 2013

How to get rid of a roommate without committing a crime

Life is divided in steps, or periods; we were all at one time just little kids crying and
crawling all the time. After childhood, we all became teenagers, and then adults after high
school. These phases in life are similar in one aspect: we were almost completely dependent on
our parents for practically everything. However, after high school, one of the characteristics of
adulthood is being accepted at a university. Many students attend college far away from home,
which both represents the separation from their parents and creates the necessity to rent an
apartment close to the university campus. In some cases, you can make arrangements to live
together with your close friends. However, many students end up living with strangers; in other
words, people that they have never seen before, people from different countries, cultures,
personalities, and goals. Sometimes it can work pretty well and the students can become very
close friends, learning from one another and growing together. Regardless, living with a stranger
can often lead to a huge relationship problem. What should you do if you face this kind of
problem? You sometimes might have desire to kill your roommate, but of course, you do not
want to commit a crime and be arrested. Therefore, the purpose of this essay is to show you how
you can get rid of a roommate without committing a crime, or in other words, this essay will
show you how to try to resolve your relationship problems in a pacific way.
The first step is the dialogue, or effective communication. Dialogue sometimes is hard,
especially if you are an inpatient person. Communicating implies to try to understand the other
side and apply empathy. In relation to this issue, Kerry Patterson, famous for writing the book
Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes are High, said: People who are skilled at
dialogue do their best to make it safe for everyone to add their meaning to the shared pool--even
ideas that at first glance appear controversial, wrong, or at odds with their own beliefs. Now,
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obviously they don't agree with every idea; they simply do their best to ensure that all ideas find
their way into the open. Over time, dialogue has been shown to be the most powerful tool to
resolve problems and conflicts among different people. Often, many people never actually
resolve their conflicts because they had never really tried to practice dialogue before. It is
important, therefore, to strive to do your very best to communicate with your roommate, as this
is a very beneficial resource. Furthermore about this issue, Tulio Maranhao said: He who knows
only his own side of the case, knows little of that. His reasons may be good, and no one may
have been able to refute them. But if he is equally unable to refute the reasons on the opposite
side; if he does not so much as know what they are, he has no ground for preferring either
opinion. (1990) As this statement implies, many people are suffering, simply because they are
so proud that they rebut reasons on the opposite side.
If conversation does not work, or if you are too shy to talk about these problems with
your roommate, the next step is to become aware of your rights. Try to find out the policies of
your contract and learn the rules of the complex where you live. These rules can be your best
friend if you are having troubles with your roommate, because if he, or she, is not following the
complex rules, you can make a complaint about it. Eckhart Tolle said, "Every complaint is a little
story the mind makes up that you completely believe in." (2006) Thus, according to Tolle, the
complaints begin when you think and believe that you are absolutely right and the other person is
the completely wrong. In the majority of student complexes, if you have three complaints against
you, you will be evicted, forcing you to leave your apartment and find a new one as soon as
possible. This is a highly useful way to get rid of a roommate, since they cannot do anything
about it if they are breaking the rules. In addition, these complaints can help your roommate to
repent, realize that he or she must change, and ultimately become a better person. This idea is
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supported by the thesis of Kevin Kelly, who said, A relationship can be strength and recovered
through a complaint. (2013) Life is full of cycles and ups-and-down; you simply can never
know who is going to change, so you need to give the opportunity to your roommate to transform
his or her attitudes and habits.
Afterwards, if these two main resources do not work as expected, you should consider a
more drastic solution. Remember that you cannot commit a crime, so be prudent in planning
what to do. The last suggested resource in this essay may come off as a little annoying, but it is
definitely effective. There is nothing more helpful to show to someone its own mistakes than
through imitation. Simply strive to copy every single annoying habit of your roommate and he or
she will realize what he is doing wrong. If he or she is a good person, your roommate will make
serious efforts to change their ways, and in turn, become a more enjoyable roommate. John
Green, an American author famous among young adult readers, wrote in one of his novels, "I'll
fight it. I'll fight it for you. Don't you worry about me, Hazel Grace. I'm okay. I'll find a way to
hang around and annoy you for a long time." (2012) Your roommate will either recognize the
flaws of his or her character, or place an ad for a contract for sale, accomplishing your plan to get
rid of your roommate.
In conclusion, it is not easy to resolve relationship problems. However, there are some
alternatives that you can try to use to solve these conflicts. Remember that your first attempt at
resolving your problems should always be communication, as this the best way to avoid more
problems while also setting a foundation of what can become a good relationship. If it does not
work, then you can try to follow the steps cited above, or you can adjust these suggestions to
your personal needs and create your own steps to resolve the problems with your roommate.
Regardless of which methods you try, the outcome should result in what is best for you.
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Reference Page

Patterson, K., Grenny, J., McMillan, R. and Switzler, A. (2011). Crucial Conversations: Tools
for Talking When Stakes Are High. Second Edition. Pages 147-148.

Maranhao, T. (1990). The Interpretation of Dialogue. Chicago: University of Chicago Press.

Page 34

Tolle, E. (2006) A New Earth: Awaking to Your Lifes Purpose. Oprahs Book Club. Page 213

Kevin, K. (2013) DO! The Pursuit of Xceptional Execution. Inspiring Irish. Page 48

Green, J. (2012) The Fault in Our Stars. Dutton Books. Page 206