Cards Against Humanity is

available under a Creative

Commons BY-NC-SA 2.0
license. That means you
can use and remix the
game for free, but you
cant sell it.
For more information:
cardsagainsthumanity.com
and
creativecommons.org/
licenses/by-nc-sa/2.0/

He who controls
__________
controls the
world.

The CIA now

interrogates
enemy agents by
repeatedly
subjecting them to
__________.

Dear Sir or Madam,

We regret to inform
you that the Office
of __________ has
denied your request
for __________.
PICK

In Rome, there are

whisperings that
the Vatican has a
secret room
devoted to
_______.

Science will
never explain the
origin of
_________.

When all else

fails, I can always
masturbate to
__________.

I learned the hard

way that you
can't cheer up a
grieving friend
with ________.

In its new tourism

campaign, Detroit
proudly proclaims
that it has finally
eliminated
_______.

An international
tribunal has
found _________
guilty of
__________.

The socialist
governments of
Scandinavia have
declared that access
to ______ is a basic
human right.

In his new selfproduced album,

Kanye West raps
over the sounds
of _________.

What's the gift

that keeps on
giving?

This season on Man

vs. Wild, Bear Grylls
must survive in the
depths of the
Amazon with only his
______ and his wits.

When I pooped,
what came out of
my butt?

In the distant
future, historians
will agree that
_________ marked
the beginning of
America's decline.

In a pinch,
______________
can be a suitable
substitute for
_____________.

What has been

making life
difficult at the
nudist colony?

Michael Bay's
new three-hour
action epic pits
_________
against ________.

And I would have

gotten away with
it, too, if it hadn't
been for
___________!

What brought the

orgy to a
grinding halt?

PICK

PICK

A big black dick.

A beached whale.

A bloody pacifier.

A crappy little
hand.

A low standard of
living.

A nuanced
critique.

Panty raids.

A passionate
Latino lover.

A rival dojo.

A web of lies.

A woman
scorned.

Clams.

Apologizing.

Appreciative
snapping.

Neil Patrick
Harris.

Beating your
wives.

Being a dinosaur.

Shaft.

Bosnian chicken
farmers.

Nubile slave
boys.

Carnies.

Coughing into a
vagina.

Suicidal
thoughts.

Dancing with a
broom.

Deflowering a
princess.

Dorito breath.

Eating an albino.

Enormous
Scandinavian
women.

Fabricating
statistics.

Finding a
skeleton.

Gandalf.

Genetically
engineered
super-soldiers.

George
Clooney's musk.

Getting abducted
by Peter Pan.

Getting in her
pants, politely.

Gladiatorial
combat.

Good grammar.

Hipsters.

Historical
revisionism.

Insatiable blood
lust.

Jafar.

Jean-Claude Van
Damme.

Just the tip.

Mad hacky-sack
skills.

Leveling up.

Literally eating
shit.

Making the
penises kiss.

Media coverage.

Medieval Times
Dinner &
Tournament.

Moral ambiguity.

My machete.

One thousand
Slim Jims.

Ominous
background
music.

Overpowering
your father.

Pistol-whipping a
hostage.

Quiche.

Quivering jowls.

Revenge fucking.

Ripping into a
man's chest and
pulling out his
still-beating
heart.

Ryan Gosling
riding in on a
white horse.

Santa Claus.

Scrotum tickling.

Sexual
humiliation.

Sexy Siamese
twins.

Slow motion.

Space muffins.

Statistically
validated
stereotypes.

Sudden Poop
Explosion
Disease.

The boners of the

elderly.

The economy.

The Fanta girls.

The Gulags.

The harsh day of

light.

The hiccups.

The shambling
corpse of Larry
King.

The four arms of

Vishnu.

Being a busy
adult with many
important things
to do.

Tripping balls.

Words, words,
words.

Zeus's sexual
appetites.