Académique Documents
Professionnel Documents
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Your Church
By Linda Ranson Jacobs
http://blog.dc4k.org
www.dc4k.org
Description: It is true there are children in our communities that are
experiencing the consequences of co-habiting, divorce, two mommies
or two daddies and they are being left out of the church family. Learn
about the different types of families we have in our world today and
how to accept and minister to them. Obtain effective tips for assisting
these stressed out children in your ministries.
Introduction
In our world today we have a huge a variety of families with the
majority of kids coming to us from some type of fractured family life.
These children come to church in a state of brokenness.
What do the families look like in your church?
What about the families in your community? What do they look like?
Brainstorm: Think of all the traumatic events a child in your
community might experience.
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17.
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3 Levels of Stress
1. Positive: Brief increases in heart rate, mild elevations in stress
hormone levels
2. Tolerable: Serious, temporary stress responses, buffered by
supportive relationships
3. Toxic: Prolonger activation of stress response systems in the
absence of protective relationships
What stress does to children
Stress is the bodys way of reacting to challenging or frightening
events.
Stressors affect children physically, emotionally, mentally and
spiritually.
Stress can affect a childs health and or behavior.
Stress interrupts the sleep process. How you can tell if a child is
sleep deprived.
Listen to conversations
Yawn or are lethargic
Frenzied activity
Dark circles under eyes
Cant focus
Stress scrambles the learning circuits in a childs brain
Affects health/ behavior
Chronic stress affects brains
Affects learning ability
Produces anger / sadness
Health run temps within 24 hours of being told trauma
Ear infections / cold
Be careful you dont experience compassion fatigue
Compassion fatigue is a term used to describe emotions and
behavior that people may show after hearing firsthand about the
traumatic experiences of others.
3
Talk to someone you trust. Talking helps you feel more in control
and less alone. Sometimes it is a reality check.
Set personal boundaries. Say no when necessary.
Do a debriefing after a session.
Share your feelings honestly with other leaders but do so in
confidence.
Take care of yourself
Eat nutritiously
Drink a lot of water
Get plenty of rest/sleep
Cut back on caffeine
Exercise yoga, running, walking
Practice breathing from the diaphragm daily
Research bears out that a smile makes a difference
1. When you take time to smile the feel good chemicals such as
dopamine, endorphins and serotonin fire off in the brain.
2. Smiling lifts your mood.
3. The serotonin that is released in a smile helps stave off
depression.
4. When you smile, people react to you differently. They tend to
treat you nicer.
5. Some researchers say that seeing someone smiling activates the
reward system in your brain. In other words when someone
smiles at you, you feel rewarded.
6. Smiling is contagious.
7. Smiling helps deepen relationships.
8. Smiling makes you attractive.
9. The world seems like a better place when you smile.
Job 29:24 I smiled on them when they had no confidence; and the
light of my countenance they did not cast down. (NIV)
Proverbs 15:15 The cheerful heart has a continual feast.
Equipping volunteers to work with stressed children
Every child is different. There is no one size fits all when it comes to
ministering to the child who is under stress.
One other factor many church leaders need to realize is with many
of these children leaders and teachers need to commit to the long
haul. It takes time for a child to grieve their losses. Churches can
run programs like DC4K, DivorceCare for Kids, or other group
support programs. These kind of programs will help the child
maintain their dignity as they heal and move into other church
programs. Assigning mentors to follow the child for several years as
they grow and move into different programs and classes is one
small accommodation all churches can make.
What this is all about -- ministering!
Resources
http://blog.dc4k.org Kids & Divorce blog, lot of articles on discipline,
brain research
http://www.americanvalues.org/search/item.php?id=25 My daddys
name is donor
https://drgrcevich.wordpress.com/2013/09/17/the-many-types-ofchildhood-trauma/ Experiencing trauma
http://www.aacap.org/AACAP/Families_and_Youth/Facts_for_Families/Fac
ts_for_Families_Keyword.aspx Lists practically every kind of
trauma/situation a child can face and does it in alphabetical order
http://www.scionofzion.com/stress.htm Stress Management by Dr. Ken
Matto (with scriptures)
http://www.heartmath.org/ Institute of HeartMath, April 11, 2013 ENews letter
http://www.charlesstone.com/ Has brain friendly tips for ministers and
lay leaders
http://consciousdiscipline.comm 800-842-2846, Conscious Discipline
Dr. Becky Bailey (Loving Guidance)
https://drgrcevich.wordpress.com Church 4 Every Child
http://www.americanvalues.org/search/item.php?id=25 My daddys
name is donor
http://refocusministry.org/2015/01/18/sundays-not-enough-anymore/
Helping churches refocus on what church should look like when Sunday
services are failing.
http://www.abingdonpress.com/product/9781426774300#.VL7JD1od8R
k Attract Families to Your Church and Keep Them Coming Back by
Linda Ranson Jacobs,
http://www.divorceministry4kids.org A lot of encouraging articles about
challenging kids, kids and stress and brain research