http://hubpages.

com/hub/-Dont-Let-Anyone-Steal-Your-Joy
(See it All in Living Color)
Well, I have to be honest, this wasn't something I mastered, it’s something I
had to learn, and practice. I never realized just how many times a day someone
tries to steal your joy. They say that Miserere love company and I never thought
about that as I went through most of my adult life, I might of heard it a few
times from relatives that always seemwed to care and felt it was their
responsibility of passing on a few bit of wisdom for me to take along my journeys,
but I used to hear allot of those kind of cliché, and as I gathered some of my own
personel wisdom along the way as I traveled through life or as being a parent or
spouse and taking on the responsibilitys one must in caring for a family.

I actually was made aware on just how serious it is to structure your life around
church, family, friends and Education through a program called New Choices, but We
get to that in a bit. but first I thought looking at certain foundations might
best set the stage to the one single thought that makes my daily experinces go so
much smoother, So looking at one choices as they surface as we start our orignal
adventures into the unknown called life. yes I miss them, I'm sure many do and
will for sure when they to reach their Golden years, as I have, well you ready.

Hopefully your career chooses you, because it what naturally makes you shine and
your truly good at it and possibely because it is what you were destined to do
anyway But hey that a whole another Hub. Truthfully with everything going perfect
in life you can still find your self getting frustrated and stressed with everyday
life. Especially as you move closer to your twilight years. It seems like you just
wake up one day and you start getting the feeling that those you spent the better
part of your life, working with or caring for have moved on and their world
doesn’t seem to revolve around you like it once did. I can't speak for others, but
it really scared me, I began to think and act out some really strange ways
especially in my behavior with others and to be honest, I really didn't notice it
at first and didn't react so well when others would hint or just point it out.

The mental and Physical changes started surfacing as I approached sixty, Some
didn't phase me, sense I saw so many before me learned to live with them, and it
didn't take me long to acquire all those little items that aided me with them,
like your Keys, Cell Phone and Car finders. But the things I had the most reaction
with was when others would tend to dismiss me from certain job related functions
as if I couldn't handle them any longer, then it started at home, Like oh here dad
I'll do that for you, or your wife would jump on you about doing certain things by
yourself, when I had been doing these thing like forever. Then came the snapping
back at people and getting upset or anger over the simplest things without a real
serious reason. Like someone using something of mine with out asking, or using
something and not put it back if was as if I had forgotten for a few moments that
they were a long time friend or family member who had come to believe it was cool,
Ha. I most likely in the past would say, hey don't be silly just borror it.. Even
when I went to a restaraunt and a waiter left something off my order I had asked
for, and what made it worse, instantly everyone would try to cover for me or fix
it. so what I didn't realize at this point is that I had over the years stuffed
away alot of issues I had encounterd along the way for one reason or another,
usually because someones else problem at the time seemly need my attention, rather
than dealing with self, and as I will discover in time to come I will resent
others because of that choice.

Now to really cap off everything I had an auto accident and Hit my Mouth on the
steering wheel and busted out my Permanent parcels, which wasn't cheap to repair.
I was so embarrassed about others seeing me with out my upper teeth, and I started
dropping out of everything. and dismissing others to go on ahead with out me
making matters worse we were having money problems, a Hurricane just happen to go
past our House in Down Town Houston, Texas, which really made things difficult to
sort out and place prority on, oh and to put the icing on the cake the economy
takes a nose dive and I get laid off, so bills start piling up and the Country
wasn't faring well it self. and if this wasn't enough on my platter I was in
constant pain with some teeth that had dissolved to the gum line as I was using
super glue to hold the messed up Parcels back in, because I didn't want to tax our
cash flow to cover the problem, yep still stuffing it all in, smiling on surface
and screaming inside because I didn't want to dump it on those who need me to be
strong. I then stupidly let one of my sons talk me into trying coke on them, to
kill the pain. Hey it worked and sense the doctor had cut off my pain medician at
the moment it made sense. To make it short I got Busted going out and trying to
obtain some on my own, and I ended up in jail, I can't even begin to share with
you how I felt inside about life in general, and especially when my family came
and saw me through that pane of Plastic, wearing a carrot suit. Iit’s like I went
from super Dad to Looser Dad. But as I spent a few months in the county jail, I
met a man, who changed my life, Mr. Danny Jones of Harris County Substance abuse
program, Its funny they were just going to give me a couple of months in the
county, but I decide to see if I could use this time wisely, so I asked the court
if I could get into any programming, like anger management, so they offered me New
Choices, which was for six months, my family didn't like it at all but, and all
but disowned me, letters stopped coming, talk of seperation, and seemly all
because I took on the extra time to get the program. Putting my needs before
theres, but as I found through group its alway easier to dismissed thing by
hanging the blame on others thoughts and actions..

Well! at first I didn't hit off too well with the councilor, we just got off to a
bad start, but as the weeks unfolded, I began to note, how much this guy really
cared for all these Inmates, If was as if he was going to save them all from
themselves. Truly He had to be totally committed to this career, Me I would have
thrown my hands up from the get go, these guys were just out of control,
constantly trying to run the show, or to better put it take control of the tank,
But I had to respect the guy, out of thirty I started with he had turned about
half of their lives around and change their entire behavior pattern, including
mine. And believe me I didn't make it easy on him; I question everything and
reluctantly surrendered one day at time.

I honestly didn't believe I had that serious of an anger problem, and I didn't
have anything in common with anyone in there, but he never gave up, and trust me I
had really pushed his buttons at time, especially when he hit the nail on the
head, with something I didn't even want to address, openly I'd explode and
strangely enough everything he asked at first would cause me to explode as if some
forced was locked inside just dieing to be released, yes he so diligently worked
stripped me of all my stubborn pride and lies I used to cover everything up,
because I thought a major part of being a man was to never show weakiness. Being
in his group was something I miss at times when little crisis arise even today.

So what did I learn, well that everyman on this planet, should learn and memorize
the 12 step of AAA, and that they will never bring their life under control with
out surrendering their life over to a Higher power, Actually the first three are
life changing, if you choose to except them Which he highly recommended we
consider seriously, To Practice the 2nd of the 12 steps. if we wished to bring the
others to a greater understanding first. It read "Came to believe that a Power
greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity". At the end of this Hub I did
type these out for you. He never forced it down anyone’s throat but did how ever
through tape or acturally church seminars and sermuns, Which some were really good
at getting others to feel and think, then he emphasize family, that we had to
except the responsibility of what our action cost our families and community, and
what are obligation were to being apart of a family, or worse except the
possibility we would eventually lose it. But the things that stuck in my mind the
most is those he keep repeating over and over, like the one thing he admitted he
wouldn't let anyone do reguardless of the situation " He wouldn't let anyone steal
his joy. and he made sure he found away of saying that everyday. Oh another was if
it didn't apply let it fly. He used that to disarm those that felt prosecuted by
things he said. We also watch a lot of video, that demonstraded just how we let
our lives and as well as those in the video's to be turned inside out, because of
the poor choices made and all the New Choices they had to make to change their
thinking so they could change their behavior patterns so to get back on track with
there lives. Yep he had these simple little phrases he'd say everyday. He also,
didn't take any Bullshit, if you would try to step around the real issues, he'd
say fast and loud, Bullshit. Yes there’s one man that had figure life out and
mastered not only his profession, but his personal life, with a few simple daily
thought, but the magic was he believed in them with all his heart, and he was
totally devoted to that which he had committed to. I regret that I didn't really
leave convincing him, just how much he had done for me, I Imagine, he really gets
very little recognition for his true labor, but what he gives himself with those
simple disciplines, makes all the difference. Theirs allot of parents out there
that will never realize what turned their Childs life around, because he a modest
man, and just does what he feels he's lead to, by the lord.

Well I hope this was of some value, and if any of you ever wish you had a set of
those three magic sheets he sends everyone home with, the 12 Steps, the serenity
prayer, and his 26 packs of work sheets on every common problem, humanity
encounters as they travel though life. just call Harris County Sheriff Department
in Houston, Tx, and ask for Mr. Danny Jones of Harris County Substance abuse
program, just tell them he's has been a counciler there for 8 years. or call
anywhere your child is being Incarcerated because of Drugs, Anger, or just out of
control, and ask how can your child get into the New Choices program such as the
one Harris County in Houston, Texas 77002 offeres, I highly recommend everyone
call and ask every sheriff department that question, because if they feel that are
child should be removed from society because of these problems, then they are
responsible now for thier welfare, sense when they need our children to fight
thier wars, or to build thier cities then they have inheritied the responibility
of seeing that they get every fighting chance to learn how to make New Choices, so
to over come the forces that cause them to make those bad choices that have led
them to thier door step, remember we pay thier salaries, we made the choice to
have a Department of Correction, so we should have some voice on how are children
are being guilded through the process of being corrected, not just housed and
released with the same if not worse problem than they arrived with. Harris
County's Guards that work with New Choice work just as hard as the Substance abuse
Staff does, they strive to insteal within each and everyone of them that if you
return again, this is a cake walk compared to where your headed,

Harris County take this programming serious, they even bring in to every thank,
Clergymen that meet there needs to thier religioun. and what even better they
address all thier medical problems, then walk them through every step needed to
reentering society the proper way, The Counselors actually talk with family
members, share there growth with them, and hear the issues they are concerned
about when Johnny comes home, so those issues can be address throughout the length
of the group meetings which are 3 to 4 hours aday and believe me these men know
how to strip away eaxch others armor and yet still have heart to help mend thier
scaring, even when its self infected.. So just as you go to vote on election day,
call and be heard on how you vote for the care of those you love. So if your in
another City or state, you should call your local Sheriff Department and ask them
if they have something simular to New Choices as Harris County in Houston, Tx
77002 has. If not maybe recommend they contact New Choices and ask them to request
some material on it. Living with joy is so much easier to do when those that love
you become envolved with understanding what your dealing with, Drugs today are
designed to addict, because those that have them manufactured do so to make
profit, so since they have 60 years or so of experience in guilding our youth of
ameria to addiction, and they seemly have alot of power if thier able to avoid
prosecution or being shut down or stopped. So we can't just use those old ways of
thinking any more, this game is serious, these are our chil;dren, not just a few
here and there, I mean in the millions, they just tryed to do what they thought
everyone else is doing. They had no idea, just how addicting these new drugs
are.So we must fight back, by helping our authoritys to save our Children lives,
through programs like New Choices.

I remember as a youth going to the movie of apocalypse Now, with Marlln Brando,
and he said a line that has stuck with me all my life the "Horror of it all" Well
today I walk the streets alot, and I believe its at a point in time when we admit
this Drug War is the war of all wars, it's destroying the very fabric of what this
world hold most sacred our family. While we staring at the sky for the possibilies
of metors coming. our measuring the water level at shore, to see just how fast the
Iceburgs are melting, and all of the other things that are placed on our family
tables trough the Internet, TV, Media, School, even all of us talking about them
as we gather, just for a second pause, and imagion what are children are hearing
and digesting at 5, 7, 9, and years of age and older, I can just Imagion that just
maybe we have been a bit careless on how we have dumped tp much on thier
developing minds way to early, before they have even had the oppurtunity to
experience the magic of life. I'm sixty three years old and I can hardly deal with
the horrior of it all, I can Imagion a 10 year old dealing with it. To give you an
example, I was walking tghrough my community and a mother yield out to her
children to get out of the street, because a guy honked his horn to warn them, as
he approached, because they were playiing ball. when the boy said to the other
kids big deal were all going to be die in 2012 anyway, and a liitle girl said, why
are we going to die to the young boy. I almost wanted to stop and listen to what
he was tellig her and the others. But today its taboo to approach others childen,
even if you know them. We have been so controlled by the Horror of it all. but if
we all put are hand on our childrens shoulders and walk with them each day, so
that we can asure ourselfs of the path thier on, sure will miss a few Soap Opera
episodes, football game, a night out with the guys, or a party at the Famingo
Lounge. but at least we sleep better and won't have to wonder what our children
are up to and who thier hanging with,

What happen to our grandparents, they all seem to have disappeared lately, I see
so many retirement home going up everywhere, and my mom has been in one for years,
and she does as much work in hers as the staff does. Oh well its a shame they had
helped raise thier childrens children for centuries, and all of a sudden they are
all better off in the retirement center, isolated from childrens laughter, from
being able to tell them stories are to read to them, or even answer a few of thier
questions, since mom and dad are at work all the time. Well I think the rest is
all up to every parent in the world, how much longer are we going to wait, are we
going to just hold off till 2012, just incase they are right this time, Oh let
them continue to stealing our Joy, after all theres the 2020 perdiction. Heck I
believe there will aways be another to replace the ones that just seemly get swept
under the rug, once they no longer obtain some effect over the masses, but can we
afford the earlier affect of a young boy believeing he going to die in two years
anyway, so why care! Is it possible we all might be letting others steal our
Joy!!!

This is the 12 Steps of AAA

1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol-- that our lives had become
unmanageable.
2. Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

3. made a decision to turn our will and our livesover to the care of God as we
understone Him

4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

5. Admitted to God, to ourselfves, and to another human being the exact nature of
our wrongs.

6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.

8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to
them all.

9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would
injure them or others.

10. Continued to take persononal inventory and when we were wrong promptly
admitted it

11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God
as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for and the power to
carry that out.

12. Having had A spiritual awaking as the result of the of these steps, and to
practice these principles in all our affairs.

I hope these might be of valve to you as they have my life and many others.