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Bible Test
It has been reported in the mainstream media recently that people are Biblically illiterate. A case is being made
to of f er Bible studies in US public schools, with the requirement that they do not promote Judeo-Christianity
but are simply a class on the history and inf luence of the Bible. As a Deist, I think this is a great idea provided
there is oversight to insure the objective teaching of the Bible. An honest objective look at the Bible would turn
any honest and objective person against it!
Below is a test I believe the public school system should use in their Bible study classes. Your input is
appreciated!
1. How many contradictory creation of man stories are there in Genesis?
2. Did the patriarch of Judaism, Christianity and Islam, Abraham, pimp his wif e/half -sister?
3. Does the Bible god f avor one group of people above all others?
4. How many "little children" did the bears kill that the Bible god sent because they teased Elisha about his
bald head? Were the bears male or f emale?
5. According to the Bible, what is God's name?
6. Did the Bible god give orders to slaughter women and children?
7. Why did the Bible god in Exodus 11:10 (among other places), the blasphemous Passover horror story,
"harden Pharaoh's heart, and he did not let the people of Israel go out of his land" and then in Exodus 12:29
the Bible god killed the f irst born of everyone, even of the animals, to punish Pharaoh f or not doing what the
Bible god allegedly made impossible f or him to do?
8. When the Bible god wanted to kill Moses, what did Moses' wif e throw at the Bible god's f eet that made him
change his mind?
9. Why does Joshua 10:12-14 say the Bible god made the sun stand still to allow the Jews more time to
slaughter their neighbors when in reality the sun is stationary in relation to the earth?
10. Why is II Kings 19 almost identical with Isaiah 37 and why is II Chronicles 36:22 identical to Ezra 1:1 through
most of 1:3?
11. Who said they did not come to bring peace, but a sword?
12. Was Jesus supposed to return to earth during the lif etime of some of his f ollowers?
13. Who was critical of the Jews f or not f ollowing their Biblical teachings to kill their disobedient children?
14. Who said their f ollowers must hate their f amilies?
Answers
1. 2. Genesis 1:25-27 and Genesis 2:5-7
2. Yes. Once when she was younger and once when she was in her 90's! Genesis 12:10-16 and Genesis 20:12 (Even though in both cases the men Sarah was handed over to did not know she was married, the Bible god

2 (Even though in both cases the men Sarah was handed over to did not know she was married, the Bible god
was upset with them and not the pimp Abraham!)
3. Yes, the Jews. Deuteronomy 7:6
4. 42 T he protestant versions of this Biblical nonsense and horror story say they were "she-bears" (2 Kings
2:23-24) but the Catholic version of the Bible simply says they were bears.
5.

Jealous! Exodus 34:14

6. Yes, many times the Bible claims he ordered the Hebrews to slaughter women and children as in Numbers
31:7-18, 1 Samuel 15:2-3 among many other places!
7. No reason.
8. T he f resh f oreskin of the inf ant son. Exodus 4:24-26
9.

Joshua 10:12-14 demonstrates the raw ignorance of the ancient Jews who wrote the Bible.

10. Bad editing! II Kings 19 II Chronicles 36:23

11. T he Christian's king of peace, Jesus. Matthew 10:34
12. Yes. Of course, he's already about 2,000 years too late! Matthew 16:28
13. Jesus. Mark 7:9-10
14. Jesus. Luke 14:26
As most Deists can see, one of our greatest recruiting tools is the Bible! Just as we learn about God by
applying our God-given reason on the designs/laws of Nature, so we learn the Bible and the "revealed"
religions have NOT HING T O DO WIT H NAT URE'S GOD when we apply our God-given reason to them!
T heref ore, if people want to get closer to God, based on their own God-given reason, they can't do so by
f ollowing the Bible or Christianity. Deism is grounded on reason and Nature and theref ore leads us to a much
better understanding of Nature's God! Please pass this test on to others who you think will benef it f rom it!