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ont laugh at me just because I humiliated myself. It could also be because I said
or did something funny, well in the positive way of course. Finally, you made m
e realize that mistakes could actually make me a better person.
Thank you for bringing me out of my shell. Thank you for destroying the perfecti
onist and kill joy creature inside me. I know I wouldnt have done those things if
not because of you. So Im really thankful that you entered my life.
How I wish youd stay with me forever.
Confessing my heart out,
Michelle
March 3
Dear Drew,
Isnt it funny that we were actually schoolmates and we didnt even know it until th
e bumping incident? Well, to be honest with you, I cant forget the fact that we b
ecame instant celebrities in our school. You being a campus crush and me being s
ort of a wallflower became an official couple in less than 2 months. Yeah, I kno
w that was quite fast but its just that its hard to stop my heart from beating bec
ause of you.
Everyday seems like a living in a fairytale. Love was literally in the air. You
became my prince and you treated me as your princess. Every time we see each oth
er, I always wish that I could stop the clock from ticking. I always wish that t
hat moment could last forever.
Unfortunately, theres no such thing as forever.
We went on searching for our own version of forever. We failed then we started a
gain. We kept on going along a road for four long years without even knowing whe
re it could be leading us.
You told me you would never give up. We would never give up. What happened to yo
ur promises? Was it all just a lie?
I kept on hanging on even if hurts already. Why did you have to keep on pushing
me away? Am I not enough? Is my love not sufficient? What have I done wrong? Hon
estly, I cant see the point why you had to go and leave me this way. You could ha
ve at least explained why you left me.
Throwing all of the memories that we shared is not easy. I know it will take som
e time but I hope that one day, when we meet again, Ill have the courage to say t
hat I got over you. But I know it would be a very long way. Im still at the start
ing point and I dont even know how to start.
Let me tell you this. Im not writing this letter to bug your conscience. Instead,
Im writing this letter to let you know what Im feeling.
Im not expecting you to reply to each and every letter that I send. Call me dumb.
Call me stupid. Call me hopeless but that wouldnt change a thing. I love you and
I know that you know that. Please keep that in mind.
Confessing my heart out,
Michelle
March 4
Dear Drew,
Alright. I wont be talking about our past already. Reminiscing each and every mom
ent breaks my heart even more. I just want to let you know that leaving without
you is like living in hell. Yeah, Ive never been in hell but one things for sure,
both things hurt.
Like Ive said before, Im not writing this to bug your conscience. I want to tell y
ou the truth. The truth that Im nothing without you.
Yes. Ive been existing for some time before you came into my life. I thought I co
uld survive with just me, Sam and my family. But heck, I was wrong. You came int
o my life and changed everything. You came without prior notice. You made me fal
l and Ive been a fool because I fell at once.
Hey, Im not saying that I regret falling for you. Its just that its so hard to live
alone again. I know I shouldnt put the blame on anyone but please let me blame y
ou this time. Its your fault why Im like this.
Why did you even have to go into my life and make my heart beat for you?
Why did you have to go and leave me?
Why didnt you even bother to return back my heart?
Its so hard to live without the person who holds my heart. Its so hard to live wit
hout you.
Could you please go back into my life? Im not begging you to stay forever. Its jus
t that I want you to have a change of heart. I want you to be a part of my life
once more. I want you to return my heart and make it beat for you.
Im not thinking of impossible things right? Please tell me that its still possible
. Please tell me that we still have a chance.
Dont make it hard for me to continue living.
I loved you and I love you still.
Confessing my heart out,
Michelle
March 5
Dear Drew,
I woke up today still wondering what went wrong. Its been a month since we broke
and still, I cant let go. Yeah, I know I must move on and carry on with my life b
ut its just so hard to do.
Again, I have to blame you.
Maybe if you didnt spoil me when we were together, I could be a lot better now. M
aybe if you let me be the person that I was even before we met, Im still very muc
h in control of my life today. Maybe if we didnt hold on for too long, I found so
meone new who could make my life worth living.
But those are all just maybes. They are not true and will never come true.
Could you just please explain why you left me? Then could you please return my h
eart as well? Maybe after that I could be myself again. Maybe after that, I coul
d learn how to love other people again.
You know what? I hate crying already. Im so tired of crying. I dont want to cry my
self to sleep again just because of this stupid heartbreak.
I hate to admit this but until now, youre still the only who could stop my tears
from flowing. Is there any way for you to go back here and wipe my tears away?
I dont want to sound desperate but I just want to say the truth. Drew, I need you
in my life. I need you so much. The moment you left, you broke the puzzle of my
life. Youre the missing piece and I miss you so much.
Confessing my heart out,
Michelle
March 26
Dear Drew,
You know what? Its kinda weird but I actually dreamt of you. I dont why but that d
ream was kind of creepy. You were there, begging for forgiveness, asking for ano
ther chance. Thats just like so stupid right? I mean come on! You were so sure wh
en you broke up with me. Gosh. I dont know what to say.
Anyways, I guess Ill be trying to go back to the normal me. If you would notice,
I wasnt able to write you a letter for 20 consecutive days already. I needed a ma
keover so bad. I cant believe that I wasted more than a month crying over a boy w
ho, maybe, dumped me for another girl. Hey. Dont get me wrong here but I swear, I
really grieved over my loss but I guess grieving is over or maybe Im on way ther
e.
Ill be going back to my business again. Remember the restaurant/bar that I built
3 years ago? I left that business for a year right? Gee. Thanks to you I had to
leave that. Pssh. Well, now, Ill be going back there. Ill be the hands-on manager
again. And guess what? My band is going to sing there again.
Hey. Im not telling you this so that you and your stupid friends would go there.
Im just telling you that finally, Im getting the chance to do what I want to. That
finally, Im almost free from all the pain and sorrow that I felt before.
PS.
You could still go to my restaurant/bar. But unlike before, youll be paying for e
verything now.
Confessing my heart out,
Michelle
March 28
Dear Drew,
se everytime I see you, you would kiss the girl youre with. Couldnt you just prete
nd to be happy for me and be a decent friend even just for a day?
You know what, I hate to say this but with what youve done yesterday, you just pr
oved to me that youre a jerk. I hate you so much! I know I shouldnt be reacting li
ke this but what the hell were you thinking huh? I told you I wanted to bring ha
ppy memories. I didnt tell you to bring me a nightmare!
Anyways, I wanted to tell you that Ill be staying in wherever country that Ill be
going for a year. Thats just the minimum though. So I really dont know when Ill be
back so that I could slap your face and hit you in your balls for being such a j
erk.
Okay. Im just kidding. I wont slap or hit you. Oh wait. Maybe Ill slap you. Ugh. Ne
ver mind. Ill think about it first so wait for it alright? =P
BTW, if youre actually listening yesterday, todays my flight. So sorry for this sh
ort letter. Im just writing this in the airport while waiting for my flight.
I hope youd take care of yourself. Please if youre really planning to have a new g
irlfriend, please find a decent one. It hurts my ego everytime I see you lip-loc
king with a slut looking girl.
Oops. This is it. I need to board already. I wish you all the best!
See you soon.
Confessing my heart out,
Michelle
April 4
Dear Drew,
Hey. I told you Ill find a way to send you my letters without you knowing where I
am right? Well, here it is. Its still my penmanship but youll never know my addre
ss. Thanks to someone I know back there. =P
Anyways, I just want to let you know that I arrived safely here. So dont worry. W
ait. Do you even worry about me? Nah. I dont think so. I have my own place here a
nd I love every bit of it. The weather is fine and it doesnt kill me to death. I
enjoy being here. How I wish you were here as well but obviously, you cant be her
e.
Since Im enjoying myself here. Ive decided. Youll be the first person to know this
so youre so privileged. Im staying here for maybe 2 to 3 years. I extended my visa
already. Im really sure about this. I have never been so sure in my life until n
ow. I know now what I want to do. I want to stay here and start from scratch. I
want to find my real passion. I want to find the real me. Im getting there one st
ep at a time but I know I have enough time to discover all the possibilities.
I dont want to bore and make you envious about all the stuff that I find here awe
some so sorry for this very short letter. I think this would be the shortest one
that Ill be sending you. Oh well, thats life. Theres always a first.
Take care alright?
Confessing my heart out,
Michelle
April 2
Dear Drew,
Wow. Its been a year since I left the country. How have you been? I know I have l
ots of connection out there but dont expect me to use them to check up on you. I
dont contact them. I didnt contact anyone for the past year. Why? I dont know eithe
r.
I just wrote this letter to give you this news. I opened my own shop in here. I
realized that my love for fashion has been kept in the back of my heart for a lo
ng time and I found the inspiration to show the people in here what I got. Guess
what? They love my designs! Im just so happy. Are you happy for me as well?
Well, besides the shop that I built, I applied as a singer in a restaurant here.
Yeah. They dont pay that much but I love doing it and the tips are overflowing.
Haha. I perform there every night and the people love me and my voice. I didnt se
e this coming but somebody asked me to have a record deal with their recording c
ompany.
Unfortunately, I had to say no.
Yeah. I may be stupid. I let the chance pass by. But I travelled all the way her
e to discover myself and enjoy life. I even told you I dont want you to find me.
How am I supposed to continue all of this if all of you would find where I am ju
st because of that record deal?
Im reaching my dreams already. Only one thing is missing. Maybe some people dont n
eed it but I think I do.
Somebody asked me if he could court me. I didnt know what to say. I mean, its been
a very long time since someone asked me this question. Tell me. What am I suppo
sed to do?
My mind and my heart are kind of confused already.
BTW, I think Im coming home soon.
Confessing my heart out,
Michelle
April 1
Dear Drew,
Its official. Im coming home really soon. I cant wait to see my family and my frien
ds again. Do you think it would be possible if we could talk in person already?
I mean its been 2 years already.
I wont tell anyone when Ill be coming back. I want it to be a surprise. So dont tel
l anyone that I decided to go home already alright? Haha.
If youre going to ask me what I would do to my business, I have an answer already
. I made a lot of sketched already and by the time that I come home, Ill just be
sending the sketches to the other designers there. I believe the staff that I ha
ve here and I know that they could succeed even without my supervision so yeah.
Ill leave the business to them.
I bought something for you by the way. I dont know if youll like it but when I saw
it I remembered you at once. Silly me. I could still remember all the things th
at happened between us even if 2 years have passed and you didnt bother to answer
even 1 letter that I sent.
But please. Dont ever think that I still have feelings for you. I know youre such
a jerk. Im going to say yes to the person whos been courting me already so yeah. I
guess this is it. I really moved on and my heart is as good as new already.
Thanks for all the memories Drew. I would never forget those. You made my life s
o special. Youll always have a special spot in my heart. But this time, I have to
give the throne to someone else.
I hope you found your happiness too. Ive been praying so hard that someone would
come along your way and make you happier than youve ever been when we were togeth
er. I really hope that my wish came true.
Dont bother asking me why I wished that. My only answer would be I still care abo
ut you and nothings going to change that, ever. Remember that okay?
Start counting the days. Well see each other again.
Thank you Drew. Thank you my friend.
Confessing my heart out,
Michelle
April 10
Dear Drew,
Im back. Sorry if I told you just now. Its been 3 days since Ive been here in the c
ountry. Its just that Ive been so busy with stuff and all.
Anyways, I want to invite you to another party. It would be on the 15th. Please
bring your sister with you. I miss her so bad already. This is just a private pa
rty so youre privileged because I invited you. =P
By the way. Dont tell anyone but that would be the day when I would say yes to Br
ad. Remember him? Hes the guitarist of my band. Yeah. I said I didnt contact anyon
e here. I lied. Sorry. Weve been talking a lot and he even followed me to Singapo
re just to court me.
Yeah. I just went to Singapore. I didnt want to travel that far. And thanks to hi
s brother because I got the chance to send you the letters without you knowing t
hat Im just in Singapore.
Sorry for all the trouble that I caused you. I know I should have kept all these
letters to myself but its just that I cant help it. I want you to know what I fel
t and what Im feeling. Maybe thats a reason why I moved on as well. Because I got