Such lamentations.... (School stuffs ....

)
I really fear that this day will come. A day Ive prayed for 2 months. A day of our
academic tribulation. Much has been expected to us but i think its too much. Were not
your ordinary robots whom you can command to work in the most excellent manner.
Were humans , we know how to feel , to focus, to be disturbed, or anything. So dont
ever tell us that we have all the time to do the plate. I hate it when our life is
commanded by such orders , groping our creativity into your ideals.. Do you really think
that creativity and excellence is what you always see?

Ive seen many of them fail. Its really hard to see that while you made it to the
final design , some of us just missed a .25 or .5. I know that some of them have this
thing greater than what I have. Their concepts are far greater than what Ive put into my
bbb (blank bristol board). Maybe Im a bit faster thats why im able to make it BUT
speed alone will never make me a better architecture student. Your input? Competition.
The output? Desperation and separation. Im saddened that the failure that theyre having
right now is not really what they deserved. Their passion is perfectly ignited and i know
that they dont deserved such 5.00 in their record.
Design is subjective. It really is. Every design has its own reason. They may not
be able to put it on the board but I know that they have their own logical
interpretation in all of those shit that youve put(i.e. Why or How).
Lets have this persons code as: lone 10. He is such a great classmate and a student. Ill
miss his supervisor-like manners in the room , going into different tables , as if checking
every plates that we have. Hahahaha seriously, i can relates into some of his dilemma.
Thats maybe one of the only childs similarities.you can relate to each others
thinking. :))
Another person is studen no: dalmatianprime04 . Im really frustated when I was
informed that she failed. Shes one of the most hardworking student that Ive known so
far. She designs with precision and a lot of careful analysis even in the smallest detail of
work. Although she dont believe me when I say that shes so good o great , i dont care.

And those two ,.. Not much to say... Hhaha just kidding! Ill be honest here(dont put
drama music!! >_< ) , THEYRE THE MOST WONDERFUL PEOPLE IN THIS
PLANET , ya know.(effin cool). Hahaha at first , they might look boring and so-generic

person but trust me, theyre the best of friends that youll meet. I didnt really expect that
Ill click to them since I dont really get acquainted with them most of the time. At first , i
thought theyre like those conyo/maarte(in case of girl) / mayabang(n case of guy) . And
during last term , every mwf , we always go out of the school together after class.
But im afraid. Im afraid that this will just be a contract of 1 term, that after this ,I
will be again a stranger to them... Basta, i know na Im too oa or too attached but in my
opinion , a sparks intensity is not determined by the time it takes to produce it , but the
power value thats put to produce it... But im still afraid..... I m getting myself ready ...
But it seems that you can never be ready with such cases of depressive uncertainty.....
Theres still so much i want to say.
.........................................................................................................gonna stop here.

A Nice without C
Mag alalay walang magagawa
Magtanong walang maririnig
Tingnan na lang sa bawat pantig
Tindi ng sakit , hapdiy kumakalabit
Kung kaya lang sana ilabas
Ang luha ng pagsisisi
Gustong ihanda ang sarili
Sa tuluyang pagputol ng tali
Siguro nga akoy may sakit
Pag hinawakan ang kamay, ayaw n maalis
Kung meron sanang magagawa
Lumayo n kayo , hanggat maaga pa
At sa pinadama na pakikisama
Akoy lubha niyong napasaya
Sa tawa , tuwa , revot kanta
Kaibigan, ayoko man , paalam muna

At times , I really feel so worthless at everyone around me. It seems that I cannot do
something good to them , even a single one. Thats why sometimes , I tend to be alone,
just to let go of that feeling of obliged responsibility of a friend or a co-student. Yes , you
can call me a psychotic shit or anything , but maybe , this is just one of my dilemmas as
an only child. That feeling that you have no one to share your feeling. It sucks. However ,
at times, Im able to release such lames and dramas to my classmates, but I do really find
it , a burden for them to hear such stuffs theyre not even interested in the first place. I

want to be alone. I really want to..

I really feel so alone. That no one will always be there. Maybe , thats the reason why
I dont believe in Best friends . In the end , it will always be a contract. It will always
end. Just like those people I once called, Best friend, where are they now? They

will all just disappear. I am really in a chamelleon-identity , i must say. I tend

to adapt in any environment with ease but no one really know my real identity. The only
place where I can be myself is in darkness , where no one can see me. Do you think that
this is my de sire? I really hate this reality where no one can see the real me. I just hate it.
For the first time , parang ang saya saya ng weekend ko. It seems n parang walang
problema . Everything seems so positive , happy , basta , COOL \M/. Pero aun mejo
badshot kahapon since dun kay girl.
Ayn may nalaman din ako regarding our school of architecture here. Ayoko namagka
issue sa kahit kanino especially dun sa mystery girl pero kasi it seems thatt things are
getting unfairfor all of them. I just can keep this in my lonesome mind cause i know
that i can do something about it. The coruption is so drastic that
A node of fraud-o-plus

Often times , I find it funny that people always mistaken my

action as either , progressing or retrogressing. The truth
is , Ive been always like this. If there is some improvement
in me , it must be my openness to the people. wow
luigee , nag i improve ka na .. Anggaling mo naman. .
Some people might be flattered if those things are being
said to them but in my condition , I might stab them to
death. Seriously. I dunno but I really hate it when
someones fraudly complementing me . So bullshit. Im not
pretty sure if ako ung may mali or what. Shit lang.

Currently , Ive having this self-inflicted dilemma on myself. Well , I know Its my fault
but it will be more awful to just blame myself alone for this bullshit . Moreover I would ,
still , like to thank thos bullshits, hahaha just kidding. :) I really treat those pole as my
second family. Oops , much drama , not wow. So gaaaaaay. >_< my apoloy. Btw , I
never Expected those dudes would come in my way. Um , yes , at time , they serve as
distractions but theyre the coolest disractions! FTW! Similarities ... Differences ..
Those are for the weak. The only thing that we care about is the tropa. I cant really
say it in personal , but those guys , Theyll be dead before Ill let them be away. Haha
IF MAY PROBLEM MAN AKO , iLL RATHER TAKE BY MYSELF
THAN TO SHARE IT WITH OTHER PEOPE , SPECIALLY TO MY
BARKADA. ITS NOT THA IM BEING AN INTROVER BUT
INSTEAD , I DONT WANT THEM O CARRY , EVEN A SINGLE
PORTION OF MY BURDEN. I LOVE MY FRIENDS. BUT THERE IS
THIS ONE THING
THAT HOLDS ME BACK
TO HAVE A
BESTFRIEND , KUMBAGA KASANGGA . TRAUMA. SUCH FEAR
ALWAYS BRING ME DOWN WHENEVER AN OPPORTUNITY
ARISES.
NAKAKATAKOT
N
ULIT
MAGKAROON
N
MAPAGKAKATIWALAAN. IM NOT SAYING THAT I SOMETIMES
NEED TO BE A RUDE ONE , BUT HONESTLY , THAT THE ONLY
WAY THAT I KNOW IN ORDER TO HOLD MYSELF , TO HAVE A
DISTANCE ON THE ONE I-WANT-TO-BUT-I-DONT-WANT-TO .... 7
YEARS AGO.. THERE WAS THIS NEW FACESTUDENT , TO WHICH I
THINK IS SOMEONE THAT I CAN HAVE A GOOD COMPANY
WITH ...

IT WILL ALWAYS BE BASED ON OUR

NATURAL NATURE WHETHER WE

SEE THINGS AS OTHER MIGHT SEE

THEM.
Its not that Im against but the
splash but if youll continue to live in
that chilly disposition , itll get you to
nowhere. :)
Itll be the funniest thing to say that
we always do things for the sake of
PASSION and shit.

Just like everyone else , you are here.

Just like what they do , youll leave too
Same as the raindrops that bashes the earth
You appear and disappear , as back and forth
Caution of mind , I said nevermind
To the reckless things, dont know whats right
In the morals of the douchebags, I laugh
Because in nothingness , they see, but black
Confusion, I felt in the hearts of the damned
For emotions they seek , for pleasure so meek
I wish that logic is the physis that I seek
In contentment and oblivion , well meet

Cryptic
Spirals of thought , scrolling the mind
Afraid of direction , dusk above fright
Whom to believe , trust at stake
Be open and able , be always vulenrable

I would like to doubt this doubt. I want to trust. I dont want to hold back.
I will change. I will not fear. The truth in my life is not purely based on what I see ,
what I think, or what I feel. Its what God truly sees in me. Real men dont really stand
alone. Instead , they go in leagues , just like a team. But how? How? Is somebody out
there? So help me God.
God is good all the time. I wish my friends could hear me. I want to express my
gratitude to them for being always there. But how? So help me God. :)
I have this very close friend. I must say that hes a very friendly person. Too bad, I
wasnt the same me , four years ago. If I could be that old me , Ill sure that well get
along better. One things for sure , Ill always be there for him for he is my brother.
Past is important. Future is more important. But above all else, my utmost priority the
thing they called now. Stay strong, brother.
Yes, I dont have an idea that I have an idea. Wo vfdew