Awkward Advice #4

By Ryan Kane

Volume 46
Issue 14B
Guest Editor:
Roxanne Glassenberg

Hello peoples! Today we

got 4 questions! Lets
answer them.
Q: <blank>
A: Mkay then

Tongue Twister
By Paige Doherty

Q: <blank>
A: Hee hee hee
Q: Youre lame,
Awesome!
A: Boo hoo. :p

This is this cat

This is is cat
This is how cat
This is to cat
This is keep cat
This is an cat
This is idiot cat
This is busy cat
This is for cat
This is forty cat
This is seconds cat

Im

Q: Potato. - Chip
A: HAAAAAAAAA!!!!!
I GET IT!!!!!!!
Okay, thats it - bye.
Ask Cooper
By Cooper the Cat

Now read the third word in

each line out loud

Hello again people! Today I only got another 3 questions. Still, 3 is three so lets
start answering
1: Dear Cooper, Would you like to meet my cat? Here are some treats! -Tippy
Sure! Id love to meet your cat, if I havent met him at Cat-Con ye-... Did you say
treats? OM NOM NOM!
2: Why does the scary Walker have 6 fingers?
What scary Walke-? *Sees picture* AAAHH!
3: How is life in Arizona?
Um I live in Newton. Arizonas across the country so how should I know?
Star Crossed Garbage
By Katie Predella

Well those are all the question I got today. Keep sending them!

There was a point in time where recycling and trash were one. Now, they are separate. This made one particular
Pepsi can very upset. It only wanted to be with its true love, the napkin. They were together for a short time, when
united on a lunch tray. Now, they are pulled apart by the needs of the environment. They were placed into two
separate cans, one for trash (the napkin) and one for recycling (the can). They were both extraordinarily sad. The
20 minutes they had spent together were the greatest 20 minutes of their inanimate lives. It broke their aluminum
and paper hearts to be separate once more. The next time you have a napkin and a can, I beg you to stop this heart
wrenching problem, and place them together, united in the recycling bin so that they can be together until the
recycling guys have to destroy them to make new cans and napkins (sad).

NINTENDO EQUALITY
By Katie Predella, Alex Wymer, Ethan Mamenta,
David Martin
K: Hello, and today wed like to talk about
Luigi, Toad, Princess Peach, and Yoshi, the
unrecognized heroes of the Mario world. First
of all, we feel as though Luigi doesnt get
enough credit for all that he does. In most of the
stories, Mario is the main hero, with Luigi as his
sidekick almost.
D: Luigi is definitely the raisin cookie of the
Mario franchise. But, Luigi did get his own year,
where he was blessed with his own games like
Dr. Luigi, Luigis mansion dark moon, and New
super luigi U. Hes been in Marios shadow for
too long, recently, (8/10/15) I had been playing
Paper Mario and there is a way you can read his
diary, and is mostly about how much he looks
up to Mario as an super star, and Marios a total
jerk to him. In new super Mario bros. wii, at the
end of the game, Mario rescues Peach, blah blah
whatever Then the Toads and Luigi come to
give them a lift in his hot air balloon, and after
they get in, they totally forget about the poor ouji
close the basket door on him and fly away. And
in the latest installment of ssb, Luigis side b
move is described as, a sideways dive that can be
charged then it says, its Luigi, so this move
can backfire
K: Next, I think we should discuss Princess
Peach. Ive noticed that shes not a playable
character in some, if not most of the games. She
is usually the princess that needs saving. I dont
agree with this at all. I think she should be able
to fight for herself, and she should be included
in some of the other games. I know in the 2009
version of New Super Mario Bros, she was
captured by Bowser (yet again), and she was not
a playable character in the game. I was upset by
this, as I sort of like playing as princess Peach
(she floats. You have to admit thats pretty cool).
However, she did have a role in New Super Mario
Bros. 3D World (Yay!). Ive been informed that
she had her own game, but it was sexist. Her
character also fits almost every female stereotype
(she fights with her emotions Really?).
Seriously, girls can fight too!
A: She does if you play Super
SMAAAAAAAAAAAAASH

BRRRRROTHERSSSS!... Sorry. Otherwise however

she NEVER seems to fight.
K: True, and I liked her having a role in that.
E: Dont forget that Toad also does a lot for them,
but dosnt get any credit. Sure they get to be playable
characters, but when have you been playing in a group
of people (excluding when Im in the group) playing
Mario, and sombody says I call playing Toad. Think
about it. If Toads werent around, Mario wouldnt have
gotten anywhare in Super Mario Galexy.
A: I agree with this. TOAD 4 PREZ
K: I agree! when Im playing with my family, no one
calls playing Toad. Everyone wants to be Mario. Toad,
Luigi, Yoshi, and Peach are all characters that few
people would want to play. Although Im an exception,
I always call dibs on Luigi.
A: Okay What about Yoshi? Hes also in
*ahem* Super SMAAAAAAAAAAAAASH
BRRRRROTHERSSSS! and he is a good character in
it. However, just like Peach, he gets zero credit from
players. The green dinosaur does have his own games
such as, the Yoshis Island series, Yoshis Wooly world,
and Thats kind of all hes in. He is playable in Mario
Kart but then again, so is everyone in the Mario series.
He is in the Super Mario Bros series but Well, Katie
you can put yourK: ALRIGHT LISTEN UP. If youre playing a level
in a Super Mario game, and you ride a yoshi for most,
if not all of the game, YOU HAD BETTER NOT
THROW THE POOR YOSHI OFF A CLIFF OR YOU
ARE A DISPICABLE PERSON AND YOU DESERVE
TO BE THROWN OFF THE FACE OF THE EARTH
AND BANISHED TO JUPITER. (Unless you
absolutely cannot finish the level without doing that,
then its Nintendos fault)
A: -Enraged letter to the world here...
W: Yoshi is AWESOME he is the best character I
wish he was is the orinshel super Mario bros Mario
gets. Yoshi is the beset he should never be a secondary
character Mario should be a secondary
A: WELP, I think thats all we had to say about Totally
discarded characters.; Nintendo, if youre reading this.
Then think about what weve said.
K: Thanks for reading, and if theres any way you know
that we can help, please submit those ideas to the Dont
Ask Us advice column box.
A: Or the Ask Cooper advice colum. Thanks! (Note:
Nintendo, if you ever read this, the two advice colums
are at our camp, so dont bother about this)

The right dog for you

By Sarah Bo

Daily Double X-Tremes!

By Roxanne Glassenberg

I was so excited the other day

because I adopted a miniature
schnauzer named Cupcake! she
is currently 6 years old but still
likes to run and play! I take her
out for walks in my backyard
when I get home for camp and
before I go to camp.

Extemely amount of advice

columns.
Extremely weird Walker.
Extremely fabulous.
Extreme members of the Emily
fan club.
Extremely hot!
Extemely strange.
Extremly cool CITs.
Extremly extreme articles.
Extremely radicool.
Extremely distraced by Pusheen.
Extreme loss of power.
Extereme moldwarpishness
Extreme stockfish scent! (I think
thats Walker)
Extreme sheep biting!
[May] the worm of conscience
still begnaw thy soul. Extremely!
(Shakespearen Insulter)
Extremely onion eyed.
Extremely awesome.

TIP: walk your dogs every day

even if they are lazy
TIP: dont over feed or under
feed your pets
TIP: you have to give your
pet a bath or take them to a
groomer(which I prefer)
Dear Sarah,
My family just moved to
California so I asked my friend
to put this in for me.My family
isnt sure sure they want a dog
and Im alergic to dog drool, not
a very active and in need for a
loyal companion.WHATS THE
RIGHT DOG FOR ME!
From, Paris Girl
Dear Paris Girl,
thank you so much for writing
to me! I think that sometimes
its hard to find a dog that
doesnt drool. I say that because
most dogs drool if you wave a
treat around or you are eating
something that they like for
instance, my dog Simcha loves
cheese and so if you eat cheese
she will come over to you and
drool on you (its really not that
gross people). Anyway,there are
no dogs that dont drool so Im
gonna have to say this. Get
a cat, fish, gerbal, hampster, or
guinne pig. Im sorry, but there
are just no dogs that dont drool.
Sorry, Sarah

New Rules Made By The Board

Of Trustees
By Paige Doherty
1. Aaron has to rotate each day of
where he rings the cowbell
2. Groupies ages are normal and
random (not in age)
3. Roller coasters to class
4. Fire Dante, David Baler, Gus,
and Mike Casey
5. Fire all male counselors and
CITs
6. Rehire all male counselors and
CITs exept Dante, David Baler,
Gus, and Mike Casey
7. Plant more trees
8. Buy a koala as a mascot and
keep it year round
9. Sell swing sets for safety and
buy new ones

COMEDY AND
NEWS
By Cole Tometsko

COMIC

Today, I am going to interview

Gabe Levine, who is a Daily
Double writer who went to
Boston Comic Con and is here
to talk about it.
Q: How did you like Boston
Comic Con?
A: Great! Awesome! Although,
it was a bit overcrowded.
Q: Meet any cartoonists?
A: No, but I met an actor named
Billie Piper.
Q: Did you buy anything?
A: Yes, I got an awesome shirt!
Q: Go to any panels?
A: Yes, the Movie Debate. I
was going to go to another one,
but I didnt have time.
Thanks a lot, Gabe, for letting
me interview you. If you have
anything related to Comedy
and Comics you want me to
interview you about, starting
this week, I will be taking
interviews to get put in the
news. Until then, that is the
Comedy and Comic news for
today and Ill see you tomorrow
for more news.

How to eat a potato

By Ryan Kane
1. Get a potato
2. Eat it
Congratulations!
Youve successfully eaten a
potato!

IDEA BOX
By Francesca Lodovico
These are the actual spellings of the idea box
notes. Lets go!
*swirlswirlswirl*
ok. * swirls around 3 times * there, done.
your favorite food and why
Pasta because YUMMM
tatt on your arm and urite about i~
WHAATT?!
write about if you died yuur hair.
if I DIED my hair? I wouldnt want to kill it!
( well, its not alive, but whatever. )
The fluffiest thing EVER
PUSHEENNNNNNN
Interview evil Dante.
Hes not that evil!
a review of the DD room
Its cool
what color are you quiz
1. what color are you?
a) the color of my skin
2) the color of my skin
d) the color of my skin
Bye ~ Bye!!!

Poetrees: Imagery!!!
By Angela Nickname Wilson
Today Id write some imagery to change it up a bit.
also, here the definition of the word imagery from the
internets: Full Definition of IMAGERY
1:
a: the product of image makers : images; also :
the art of making images
b: pictures produced by an imaging system
2:
a: figurative language
3:
a: mental images; especially : the products of
imagination
credit to http://www.merriam-webster.com/
dictionary/imagery for the definition.
As the smell of of the eternal fires is wafted down
towards the earth, the flying woman prepares to fly.
With a WHOOSH! She soars downward, leveling out
as she draws towards the mortal world. Her gown of
swan white silk bellows out around. Her face is perfect,
angelic. Her golden hair is loose and shifts in the wind
around her. Her eyes are purest white. She pulls back
her arms and shoots off like a bullet. She rockets in a
circle around the winter wonderland where everything is
dipped in marshmallow fluff. She floats over lake and it
is imcity below her in every widening stokes. As she flies,
she paints a picture. A picture of a deep, lue coated in a
layer of icy frosting. In the morning, the world gasps at
the wonder the lies thickly around them.

Reasons Why Bowties Are Cool, Possibly The Coolest.

By Rachel Alpert-Wisnia
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.

They are the greatest shade of red.

They are very handsome and flattering.
They go with any outfit.
They can save your life.
In case of a robbery, they are very helpful in
choking the robber.
6. They are magical.
7. Because Amy Pond says they look good.
8. Because The Doctor says so.
9. The Doctor gets to kiss Amy Pond because of
them.
10. Because they are cool.

Which Billy Joel Album Should You Listen To?

By Maia Kahn
The title is pretty much self-explanatory. Note: Only a few
albums are on this list, as the Billy Joel discography consists
of 12 albums! Im using the three I know most well in this
article.
Here are the genres/types of music I will be basing these
albums on:
Rock
Retro
Soft Rock
Pop Rock
Jazz Rock
New Wave
1. Rock + New Wave + Soft Rock = Glass Houses
Year Released: 1980
No. of Songs: 10
Personal Faves: Sometimes a Fantasy, I Dont Want to be
Alone, Sleeping with the Television On, Its Still Rock
and Roll to Me
Notes: THIS ALBUM IS SO GOOD! It has a super upbeat,
rock-n-roll vibe that makes you want to dance, sing and airguitar along enthusiastically (listen to Sometimes a Fantasy
and youll know what Im talking about), yet slows down
toward the end with nice songs like Cetait Toi (You Were
the One) and Through the Long Night. There isnt a single
song I dislike on Glass Houses, and its one of my favorite
albums ever.
Fun Fact: The first track (You May Be Right) opens with
the sound of glass breaking, coinciding with the album title
and the cover picture of Joel aiming a rock at a glass house.
Billy Joel also won a Grammy Award for Best Male Rock
Vocal Performance for his work on Glass Houses.

2. Retro + Pop Rock = An Innocent Man

Year Released: 1983
No. of Songs: 10
Personal Faves: An Innocent Man, Uptown
Girl, The Longest Time, Easy Money
Notes: I honestly cant believe this album didnt
come out in 1960. Billy Joel MASTERED the
sound of 50s/60s hits with a series of incredibly
accurate homages to various artists, including
the Supremes and the Temptations (Tell Her
About It), Bob Marley (Keeping the Faith),
and Frankie Valli & the Four Seasons (Uptown
Girl). I also love Easy Money (a tribute to
James Brown), and the do-woppy a capella
track The Longest Time. This album has a
lot of variety, and its fun to listen to. A+!
Fun Fact: Billy Joel wrote the material on
this album while remembering the music he
listened to growing up, and said that during the
process he felt like a teenager all over again.
3. Rock + Soft Rock + Jazz Rock = The
Stranger
Year Released: 1977
No. of Songs: 9
Personal Faves: Scenes from an Italian
Restaurant, Movin Out (Anthonys Song),
Only the Good Die Young, Vienna
Notes: I looooooove this album! No two songs
on The Stranger sound alike, and it has some
of my all-time favorite songs on it. It contains
amazing tracks including its title song, which is
a rock song sandwiched between two iterations
of a haunting piano/whistle refrain, if that seems
possible. The Stranger also features songs such
as the jazzy, 7-and-a-half minute long Scenes
from an Italian Restaurant, rock-and-roll jam
Movin Out, and the always lovely Vienna.
I dare you not to love this album. Its just that
good.
Fun Fact: This is Billy Joels best-selling noncompilation album, and was ranked #70 on
Rolling Stone magazines 500 greatest albums
of all time.
So, I guess thats it for this article. I hope you
take my opinions into consideration, as these
are all amazing albums. Happy listening!

Ballet and Hip Hop

By Emma Falkowski,Jessica Wen and Tahnyia Black
Photos by Emma Falkowski, Jessica Wen and Tahnyia Black
On Tuesday, August
11, 2015, we went to Ballet
and Hip Hop Junior to see
what they were working on. In
Ballet we got to see a beautiful
performance done and then
asked some questions like:
what is the hardest dance
move in your performance
and in general for ballet?
They responded with Tour
jete and for ballet in general
they said arabesque. We
also asked: what are you
working on and what are your
goals for Festival Day? They
stated that they were working
on fixing up what they are
working on and their goals
are to present something that
inspires people!

In Hip Hop Jr. we got
to witness a very entertaining
day. It was obvious that they
were having fun. We asked
them questions to go with the
pictures that we took! The
first question that we asked
was what their hardest move
that they have learned in
the dance? Side split was
everyones answer. Then we
asked them what they were
working on at the moment.
They said it was called boom
boom pow dance! We also
asked them what their goals
were for Festival Day. They
said all songs would be put
together, which seems like
an awesome idea! The last
question we asked them was
what their favorite part of the
class was. They all answered
with the desk routine.

Quiz: What Food Are You?

By Livvy Segall

Ask for Ask

By Mr. Ask

1. What kind of names do you like?

a. top 10
b. rare names
c. your name
d. fandom names
e. names that are words

Okay, so today I only got one question and I am very sad, but I need
more! Here is the one question I got:

2. How do you break up a fight?

a. you dont
b. talk it out carefully
c. talk about how you break up
fights
d. refer to your favorite book
character
e. Be creative

Q: Dear Ask for Ask,

Should I ask you a question to ask you a question? What I need to know
is: what is the best song
in the world, or at least on planet earth?
signed,
Peace for Peace
A: Well yes. And I think the best song is the campfire song song!
until next time...

3. What do you look for in a friend?

a. popularity
b. caringness
c. liking you
d. intelligence
e. spunkiness
4. Whats your favorite at-home
activity?
a. sleeping
b. taking walks
c. screaming when youre home
alone
d. SCIENCE!!!!!!!
e. art
5. Whats your favorite electronic
device?
a. phone
b. iPad
c. wi-fi router
d. gaming computer
e. camera
6. Whats your favorite place to
visit?
a. a big city
b. family
c. your house
d. a library
e. a studio

The Chihuahua!
By Abby Wilson
Known as the smallest dog in the world, the chihuahua is one of the
best breeds of dog. Perfect to spoil and hug and kiss and to fit into
a handbag, they come in many different colors like white, black,
cream, and a mix of all those colors. The chihuahua has a stubborn but
affectionate personality. Their country of origin is Mexico and their
lifespan is 12-20 years, which means that if you get one of these funloving, tiny dogs, you have a great long time to love them!

If you have mostly

As: You are a hamburger and fries! People know who you are, but you
can definitely be a pick-me-up.
Bs: You are a foreign cuisine! You are wise beyond your years and
people still are getting to know you.
Cs: You are dessert! You can be annoying sometimes, but you know
people just want to be with you.
Ds: You are a failed science experiment that just happens to be edible!
Self explanatory.
Es: You are a decorated and filled cake! You are always revealing new
and artistic things about yourself.