John 12:1-8

Mary’s Extravagance

Once is not enough..!

About 15 years ago, in a parish far, far away, I was engaged in some marriage
counselling between a husband and wife, in their early 60s. I won’t go into details –
they are not important. But fundamentally, she was feeling taken for granted and he
was a Man’s Man, ex-Navy, not good at showing his emotions.
During one session, I said to him, “Do you ever tell your wife that you love her?”
“Of course I do”, he said. She looked at him and said in a really sharp voice, “You
never tell me you love me!” He looked away from her and looked at me: “Yes I do,”
he said. “I told her I loved her on our wedding day in 1961. Nothing’s changed. Once
is enough. She doesn’t need telling every day!”

Mary’s intimacy with Jesus

I think it’s probably important to express our love to others a little more regularly than
once every 35 years! And in this reading we have a story of Mary expressing her love
to Jesus in a most beautiful and intimate manner. Let’s give some thought to this
story from John 12…
Now this is a passage that is often confused with a similar story in the other
Gospels. In Matthew and Mark’s Gospels, Jesus has his head anointed by an
unnamed woman at the house of Simon the Leper during the last week of his life. In
Luke’s Gospel, the event happens earlier in Jesus’ ministry in the house of Simon the
Pharisee and the woman mentioned there is a notorious sinner who rubs oil of myrrh
into Jesus’ feet.
But in John’s Gospel, we have a different situation mentioned. The woman is
named: Mary. Not only that: but she has a close relationship with Jesus. She is not a
stranger to him and there’s something very beautiful in that because she doesn’t
need to convince Jesus that she loves him. He already knows…but she wants to tell
him anyway. And she chooses to do so in a really public fashion, in the middle of a
dinner party…
Now, this must have been an amazing dinner party to attend. There were so
many conflicting emotions amongst the people there.
Jesus was keeping his head down because there was a warrant for his arrest
from the Temple officials.
Lazarus has just been raised from the dead a few days before. I have no idea
what he must have been feeling!!!
Mary and Martha are in complete shock. They had buried their brother and now
here he is back with them. Their heads must have been spinning.
Judas is in a bad mood, moaning about the lack of money and the way resources
are being wasted.
So many different agendas and emotions – a charged atmosphere…
And, at the heart of this, is the realisation amongst everyone that Jesus’ days are
numbered. Everyone knew that he would soon be caught and arrested and there
would only be one outcome from that: trial and execution. So, just for a short while,
Mary and Martha are able to offer him some beautiful hospitality; a little respite from
the rigours of those anxious days, an opportunity to feed him, to give him some
space to relax…This is a beautiful gift of hospitality and compassion when it was
needed the most
They all sit at the table together and then Mary performs this most incredible
ritual. She holds the clay jar in her hands, opens it up, loosens her hair and pours the
perfumed oil extravagantly on Jesus’ feet and very intimately, wipes the oil into his
feet with her hair. This was an extraordinary way for any woman to behave, an
incredible and bold display of public affection that transcended so many boundaries
and social barriers.

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 But then John records these beautiful words in verse 3: “The sweet smell of the
perfume filled the whole house.” What a beautiful comment to make after what has
just happened…
But Judas – grumpy Judas – is angry at this excessiveness. He is angry at this
display of extravagance. “Why wasn’t that perfume sold? We could have made loads
of money! Think how many poor people we could have fed! Mary – you are so
selfish!!”
But Jesus turns on him and says he is wrong. Judas is the one who has
miscalculated – not Mary. “Let Mary do what she has done. The poor: you can help
them any moment of any day you want. But I won’t always be here with you. Just for
once, Judas, do something nice for me. Show a little extravagance. Just for once,
show a little excessiveness in love.”

Mary’s prophetic witness

But it wasn’t just a display of extravagance on Mary’s part. Jesus also recognised it
as the prophetic act it was meant to be. What we see in this scene is an acting out of
the scene that is to come…
Judas – challenging Jesus’ authority and not valuing him for who he was.
Mary – anointing Jesus’ body with perfume; probably perfumes that were left over
from Lazarus’ funeral.
Outside the door, there is an empty tomb. Once it had been Lazarus’ tomb but
now it is empty, waiting for another body. Perhaps the people in Bethany were
wondering whose body would be buried next. Mary’s prophetic act of anointing
makes it clear. It will be Jesus…
Mary is acting out a prophecy in the same way that the Old Testament prophets
used to do; Ezekiel eating scrolls , Jeremiah smashing clay jars, Hosea marrying a
prostitute or Isaiah walking around naked. And now Mary, anointing Jesus body for
death
Judas was angry at the waste. But Jesus says, “Leave her alone. Let her say
what she has to say. Mary knows…”
And, of course, Mary carries out an extravagant act as her prophetic mime
because it is in the extravagance that we are reminded of the extravagance of God in
sending his son Jesus to die for us. There is nothing miserly about God’s love for us.
He is excessive in his forgiveness and mercy and grace and Mary’s act reminds us of
that.

Our response
So, in the light of this story how are we called to react to God? I think there is an
invitation in this story for each one of us to show extravagant love to Jesus in
response to the extravagant love he has first shown to us in dying on the Cross for
our salvation.
Mary was giving to Jesus the best she had. Mary sacrificed all in a relationship of
mutual love. Can we do the same? You know the Christmas Carol:
“What can I give him, poor as I am?
If I were a shepherd, I would give a lamb
If I were a wise man, I would do my part
What shall I give him? I will give my heart”
That is the message of this passage from John 12, that Mary gave to Jesus what she
was able to: excessively, extravagantly and we are called to do the same…
The truth is, each one of us has been excessive and extravagant in the depth of
our sinfulness and hard-heartedness. We have all been excessive and extravagant
when it comes to pride and anger and jealousy and envy. So now it is time for us to
show extravagance and excessiveness in love.
And when we do that, when we give to Jesus to the best of our ability the room
fills, metaphorically, with the sweet smell of perfume…

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The Judas in us
We can’t leave this passage without saying a few words about the behaviour of
Judas in this story.
We know that Judas was the money-man. He looked after the money for the
disciples. He kept the budget, as it were. Ironically, of course, it was money that
would be his downfall. Thirty pieces of silver, to be exact…
And perhaps what we see in the life of Judas, particularly through his act of
betrayal and also through this story, is an example of someone who had a gift or
talent and allowed it to distort their way of being.
Judas was no doubt good with figures – he was a financial talent – and that’s why
he was chosen to be the Treasurer for the disciples. But Judas abused that talent.
He abused the gift God had given him and so developed a hardness of heart that
wrecked his relationship with Jesus.
Perhaps there is a lesson for us in this. Perhaps we need to ask ourselves how
we are using our gifts and talents. Are we using them for our own ends, for our own
ambitions or are we using our gifts and talents to bring glory to God?
But more fundamentally, Judas did something far worse…
He hurt Mary’s feelings and was insensitive to her.
Mary tried to do something beautiful for God. Mary wanted to do something
extravagant. Mary wanted to do something creative to show Jesus how much she
loved him. And Judas sat there, with a scowl on his face and sniped and criticised
from the sidelines.
How dare he? How dare he criticise someone else’s expression of love for God?
What right did he have to say that Mary’s gift was inappropriate?
This was a sacred moment for Mary and Judas ruined it for her…
I want to warn each one of us – myself included – against such ungodly and
downright nasty behaviour. We need to be very careful in this…
When it comes to worship, when it comes to expressing love for Jesus, different
people do that in different ways. There is no right or wrong way to worship God.
There is no gift that is more appropriate than another. The sacred time of one person
will look very different from the sacred time of another. And we need to be very
careful indeed before we set about criticising another’s gift to God.
There is a Judas of criticism inside each one of us and we need to be very careful
to keep that under control. And it is difficult…
One of the things I have given up for Lent this year, is sarcasm. It is really difficult
not to be sarcastic sometimes, especially when you have 3 teenage kids (I say that
as a point of fact, of course, not as a sarcastic comment!) But the word ‘sarcasm’
comes from a Greek phrase meaning, “I eat flesh”. And that’s exactly what sarcasm
does. It eats away at people and gradually destroys them. Sarcasm eats away at
communities. Sarcasm destroys fellowship, it wrecks churches. Sarcasm must not be
tolerated for the sheer hurt it causes

The final truth

The final truth in the story is this: Jesus loved what Mary did. It may have been
extravagant. It may have been a bit excessive. It may have been a ‘waste’ of
resources. But Jesus loved it! He loved to see Mary give herself so freely and openly
over to him. Jesus rejoiced in her extravagance.
And here’s the challenge to us as a church community…Can each one of us
show extravagance towards Jesus ourselves? And crucially, can we rejoice in the
extravagance of others? That is the right and godly thing to do…
Jesus has been extravagant and excessive in his love for us by dying on the
cross. It is time for us to be extravagant and excessive in return. in our love and
service of him. It is time for us to give up sarcasm and criticism and rejoice in the
extravagance and excessiveness of each other. as we seek to glorify God in this
church. Amen.