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For the first time in her life, Jocelyn felt like she not only had
a purpose but a clear-cut course, too. She saw little of the doc-
tors for the first few weeks and even less of Warden Crawford.
Assigned to simple, straightforward tasks, Jocelyn began to wear
holes in her shoes from making frequent trips up and down the
first and second level patient halls, changing sheets, delivering
tiny paper cups of medicines, and swapping out, disinfecting,
and returning bedpans. Gradually she began to recognize the
faces underneath the little white paper hats—the other nurses
were cordial, but none of them came close to her friendship
with Madge.
Madge, who still managed to find time to flirt with orderlies
and doctors alike; there was no telling how she did it. For her
part, Jocelyn could barely scrabble together a spare minute to
eat lunch.
But that was all right. She had expected hazing, but instead
Nurse Kramer assigned her some of the calmer patients. In
particular, Jocelyn liked Mrs. Small in 214—her dementia had
progressed to a point where her stories varied day to day, but
every once in a while the old woman described the fishing trips
she used to take with her husband, and Jocelyn would listen
intently, giving the patient a sponge bath or trying to coax her
to eat breakfast. She would wonder where Mr. Small was now.
Had he died before her or had he abandoned this gentle soul?
Jocelyn had watched her own grandmother succumb to a simi-
lar disease, and she was the only family member who’d bothered
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