Staggering Seduction Mines

It is the art of breaking barriers and quickly integrating yourself

into her romantic narrative in a manner that will feel gradual and
natural. I call it 'staggering because of both the incredible results and
because the principle is to break down barriers in overlapping levels and
to create a seduction narrative for her, bringing together her different
realities. Think of it as setting land mines in a staggered pattern. Every
time she attempts to erect a barrier, a mine will explode and give you
further access into her world. And in the end, you bring it together with
her. If you do this correctly, she will be willing to do virtually anything
for you.

Limits of speed seduction (at least of the version so far

revealed):

1) Women have deeply embedded obstacles. It will take more

than simply creating a temporary state of stimulation or
1

openness. She has been training herself for 20+ years to

erect certain barriers. Even if you overcome some of her
obstacles by inducing her into a temporary hypnotic state,
there is a high likelihood that she will retract and put up her
former obstacles once the feeling is gone or you are away,
e.g. the same way the temporary high that comes from
listening to self help tapes goes away after a few days.
Anchors have limited use when they are attached to feelings
and aren't in turn attached to more profound states that are
related to a woman's deepest, most closely held and complex
thoughts. Speed seduction needs a more realistic and
integrated synthesis where the seducer becomes part of the
woman's intricate and lasting thoughts and feelings.

2) These deeply embedded obstacles often make asking her

direct questions to access the fourth level of her mind or
introducing ideas using traditional SS methods (e.g. weasel
phrases) somewhat ineffective. For example, imagine what
would happen if someone you didn't know well asked you
about the specific reason you really enjoy 'x'. You may be
unmotivated to really think about the answer unless you
already really like the person. Without first establishing a
deep level of rapport and trust, and without something to
2

make her WANT to discuss things with you, you will probably
often get cursory and even inaccurate answers.

Just think

about how your parents used to ask you all those questions
about what you enjoy about school, etc.we are inclined to
provide curt answers that say nothing when we are
unconcerned about what the other person thinks or do not feel
motivated to involve ourselves in deeper communication.

3) Ross's answer is to establish rapport before you go into this

type of questioning. He would have us do this with laughter
and making small talk to maker her comfortable. Certainly this
is a viable solution, but it is also easier said than done.
Moreover, if someone is skilled enough to establish this
rapport, they are probably on the path towards seducing that
individual even without using SS tools. A programmatic
technique is thus needed to simultaneously address the
problem with establishing rapport and to put her into a state
where she WANTS to be seduced.
.
.

Basics/purposes of this staggering seduction mines:

1)

Establish a way to simultaneously building rapport and trust by

gradually breaking down her obstacles. These barriers include:
social expectations, peer influences, personality (she isn't used
to being open in this way), moral constructs, and inertia
(especially if she is attractive, she may be unreceptive unless
you provide something that she wants or something that
intrigues her). This technology does not assume that
instilling a momentary or temporary feeling will suffice to break
down the walls. There must be substance underlying the
seduction and substance underlying the lowering and
elimination of her barriers. The idea behind this important
distinction between this technology and SS is that feelings are
not easily recalled, even with anchoring. Her former barriers will
likely destroy whatever temporary progress you have made.
However, if these feelings are combined with ideas, values,
deep memories, hopes, dreams, and the very constructs of her
character, you become something much more important than
someone who temporarily made her feel good. You become
essential to her sense of higher self. Borrowing that infamous
line from Jerry Maguire, "you [will] complete her."
4

2)

Make her anticipate your words and focus on what you have to
say because you will be intriguing, comfortable, and somewhat
confusing to

her. You will instill the feeling in her that you have something
valuable and perhaps essential to add, not only to the
moment, but in her entire life and to her eternal mind and
soul.
3) Give her access to herself in a way that makes her feel as if
she has unlimited power to make herself whole. And provide
"specific generics" that give her reason to believe that you
know more about her than she realizesthat you possess some
kind of insight and wisdom that you will reveal on your own
terms. E.g. asking her if she ever had a secret desire to be an
actor. Use the horoscope principle. That is, if you provide a bit
of insight or a broad level prediction, if she is in the proper
state, she will fill in the blanks and make whatever you say
true. Everything you say will start to take on significant
meaning and she will come to see you as her authority in life.
This is extremely powerful, but also terribly dangerous.
4) Instill yourself into her personal narrative by accessing her
past, present, and future; fluctuating between the three; and
making suggestions about her, about you, and about the two
of you within this context. This is the key to this technology
you will access pleasant and cherished childhood memories,
and integrate them with her present and future. This must
include symbols and snapshots or movies that reveal her
6

values, fantasies, dreams, and aspirations. It is time-distortion

to the tenth power, adding underlying substance to it. If you
are able to integrate these things, you will make her feel
'whole'

and you will be given the opportunity to inject suggestions about

your role in her life very easily.
5)

This technology is called "staggering seduction mines"

because you are laying conversational traps to gradually break down

her barriers, and you will destroy these barriers and employ a
staggered seduction strategy, alternating between her different
realities (past, present, and future) and integrating them, while
incorporating yourself as the glue that holds them together. Break
her down her different levels and put them back together.

Strategic Implementation

These are general suggestions; they merely present a structure

for using this technology. The real power and force in this technology
comes with true understanding of the underlying principles. Thus,
although I present steps in applying the technology, it should not be
taken so literally. These steps are simply examples and highlights of
key principles. One who does not understand the principles will likely
fail in using the technology. However, one who does understand the
principles and learns how to carry them out will wield incredible
power. While I hesitate to use the comparison, it is the same principle
that compels nations of people to follow a cult-of-personality leader
with unbridled devotion and it is the same idea that makes
reasonable people able to fall prey to cult leaders. These ideas
combined with the strongest applications of SS make this technology
absolutely deadly.

Step one:
Set a precedent that allows you to bring up random ideas of which
she will search for greater meaning. This will give you the opportunity to
set 'conversational traps' without having her become suspicious that you
are trying to lure her into your control.
Very importantyou must intersperse profound and extremely
9

intelligent ideas with ridiculous and seemingly irrelevant ones. This is

not the same as interspersing hypnotic suggestions with fluff. You are
condition her to confuse

10

and add intrigue and mystery, making her more attentive and curious.
Make it so that she has a difficult time being able to tell whether you
have said something extremely important or whether you're just being
wildly creative. Do this using an inconsistent pattern. What you discuss
does not have to be geared towards specifically seductive topics. Rather,
you are laying the groundwork so that she will be somewhat confused by
you, but will come to suspect that there's something really deep going on
in your mind. You are conditioning her so that she will come to believe
that everything you say may be interesting and important.
For example, I have gained the instant respect and curiosity of a
number of women by saying something as ridiculous as "You know, I
think Beavis and Butthead is a really good show." She will inevitably
scoff at me and talk about how stupid a show it ishow it's just two
idiots making dumb comments. I will respond by pausing a while, looking
at her for a while, and without any disrespect say "is that all you see in
it? Hmmmm... I guess that's probably what most people think, now that
I think about it." She will start to feel as if I am judging her, though not
necessarily in a manner that it terribly threatening, since it's Beavis and
Butthead afterall.
Only when she asks what I think, as she inevitably will, since she
wants to know on what basis she is being judged, I will launch into a
detailed discussion of how the writer of the show perfectly captures the
most mind-numbing side of suburban dystopiathe imaginary place
11

where life is depressingly wretched and where people live a fearful

existence. I discuss how the idea that these two kids

12

who have nothing in life besides each other and their television
communicate in a way that barely recognizes the existence of the other.
For example, there are numerous scenes where one of them gets hurt,
and the other acts as if he does not even realize it. It's as if the other
person is no more real to him than what he sees on televisionthe most
compelling recent rendition of individualism in our capitalist society
leading to an existential crisis. I'll then compare it to various works of
literature that invoke the same theme, and explain to her that most
people mistake the presentation for lack of substance, which is no
different from judging a book by its cover. I inform her that during
Dostoyevsky's and Kafka's time, their writing was treated as mere
comedy.
Her reaction to my discussion is usually one of tempered
curiosityshe'll of course say that she thinks I'm reading too much into
it, but it's obvious that she is surprised by my insight and is forced to
question whether she's missed something just like everyone else has.
To cap off the discussion, I'll discuss how intelligent the creator is,
referring to an interview and something really profound that he said,
just to make her question herself even more.
It's terribly important to not fight her on it Never be defensive
and treat the conversation like it's being had in good fun. Make her
wonder just how serious you are. Let your statements speak for
themselves, [as an aside, in the above discussion, I've also laid a
13

powerful seduction mineone that is setting up a discussion about

living life to the fullest and achieving the optimal statemore on that
later] Note, if you are unable to discuss your 'ridiculous topic'
intelligently and thoroughly, don't do ityou'll just end up looking silly.

14

So what I've done accomplishes a number of things. First, by making

what initially seems like an absolutely ridiculous statement and allowing
her to think of it/me as ridiculous, I let her know what it feels like to look
down on me or dismiss what I say. Then I lower the boom and
overwhelm her with a discussion to show her just how wrong she is and
let her question her judgment about whatever I say, and essentially
about me. If I do this in a light hearted and even humorous way and
intersperse it into the conversation enough, she will begin to actively
listen to me and will become afraid to dismiss anything too readily for
fear that she'll miss something or be seen by me as not worthy of my
company. I can't emphasize enough how well this works.
Another way to accomplish the same thing is to lace the conversation
with things that seem like they're wildly irrelevant. When you show her
how relevant and interesting your point is, she'll be intrigued and forced
to take what you say seriously, again for fear that she's missing
something. The more seemingly irrelevant comment, the better.
For example, a woman once told me how her younger brother was
really shy. I informed her that a number of mentally ill people take up
the martial arts. Of course, she became offended and asked whether I
was saying her brother was mentally ill. Then I explained to her how the
act of going through physical routines and engaging in a disciplined
practice instills confidence and greater poise, and this is why many
mentally challenged people are encouraged to take up the martial arts.
15

I told her how her brother should focus on an activity that requires a
high level of physicality and discipline because it will force him to focus

16

less on his internal states and instead on a rigorous practice of 'x\

[another asideagain, I'm laying down a conversational mine about how
focus on the external and emphasis on internal states are at oddsit will
be easy for me to talk about her internal states and what she focuses on
in the environment later on]
Btw, I explained to this woman the relationship between her
brother's shyness and mentally ill people practicing martial arts it a lot
better than what I've just writtenbut the idea is that you are
conditioning her in an extremely powerful way. If you are able to set a
precedent where you have the liberty to bring up anything, no matter
how irrelevant it seems, then it will make it much easier to apply
traditional SS techniques later on. Moreover, it will give you the license
to bring up seductive topics without having her instantly erect her
typical obstacles to you. And you start gaining a license to shock her.
You get her used to your saying things that seem outrageous, and
eventually you will normalize these outrageous comments so that she
will eventually start to create a special rule for youthat your
outrageous comments are OK, because occasionally she finds out that
they're really relevant and insightful! Because she's seeing you as a
wildcard, she will consciously and subconsciously question her own
patterns of behavior as it relates to her automatic distancing herself
from potential threats. Eventually you will use this to your advantage by
bringing up sexual themes that would have scared her off had you not
17

conditioned her to accept them.

Do not make the mistake of always explaining why what you've said
is relevant. Don't a jerk about it, but make it so that you are picking
and choosing

18

what you explain. It's all on your terms, because you are the one
with the knowledge, wisdom and power.
Step one is intended to break down her barriers that resist comments
and behavior that fall outside of her moral, social, aesthetic norms. It
lays the groundwork for what you will bring up later. Also, it increases
your worth in her eyes, because she will view you as someone who has
something to add on his own terms. You'll start to become that
interesting and mysterious person who is worth getting to know.

Step two:
Laying conversational traps/mines. Although you have already set
the precedent that allows you to bring up what most people could not,
you still don't want to scare her off, and you must remember how
cautious some women can be (and with good reasonthink of all the
kooks, stalkers, and just awkwardly aggressive dorks there are out
thereattractive women become quite adept at sniffing them out and
shutting them down).
What are these conversation traps? They are references that you
intersperse throughout your conversation so that at a later point, you
can draw a link or reference to what you had said before, making it
seem like you're simply picking up on something that had been brewing
in the conversation. This will make it seem like your conversation has
gradually developed in a substantive manner. It's an interesting but
19

empirically true psychological phenomenon. People feel like if you're

bringing up something that links to something that was previously
raised, it's natural and part of the development of the conversation. It
takes the pressure off of bringing something up in its cold start
newness. This is one of the solutions to the rapport problem I noted
earlier.
In the SS DC 2000 seminar tapes, one student discussed how he
tried to engage in conversation with a woman he met at a bar. He asked
the woman what she really enjoyed about her job and what was
important to her about it. Not bad questions, right? Well predictably, the
woman thought it was a little strange that he was asking these types of
questions right off the bat, and answered in a way that revealed little
and did nothing for him. Ross's answer was pretty cursory, telling the
student that he had failed to first get into the state himself and that he
had failed to establish rapport. While I agree that getting into an open
state before you attempt to get someone else into that state is
important, it is obviously not so simple, and I realize that Ross realizes
this. The difficulty of establishing rapport in the way that Ross would
have his students do should not be underestimated. It is an especially
significant hurdle to overcome if the person doesn't know the woman
well already. This is why you set conversational traps.
Substantively, the conversational traps should be geared towards
touching upon the areas in which she is most likely to have obstacles
20

that prevent her from wanting to allow you to become intimate with her
(and I'm speaking on a holistic level, not just a physical level). As I've
stated, these barriers include ideas that she got from family, friends,
her general moral code, inertia, and the patterns she has assumed in
her personality. The idea is that at the incipient

21

stages of the conversation, you sprinkle into the discussion statements

that can be recalled later on.
Let's say that you suspect that she has a barrier in that she's strongly
influenced by family pressures and will not get into a relationship unless
her family would approve. Maybe her family has an undue influence on
her choices in this way. Anyhow, if you aren't positive about this and do
not have an opportunity to address it, it's likely that this barrier will be
extremely difficult to overcome. So you need to get her to consciously
think about this barrier and when she does, you can use the principles of
SS 2000 to get her to think differently and additionally, you demonstrate
that you have an understanding of these barriers. The conversational
trap should be subtle and must not appear forced.
Using the above example, let's say that you're talking about
something mundane like weather. "Beautiful day," she'll say. "Yeah. Uh
huh, it's supposed to be beautiful all weekend" a normal dullard would
respond. But you, instead, will set a conversational trap and will say
something like "Yeah, it's supposed to be sunny all weekend, but even
so, I have this irrational impulse to carry an umbrella. I think this is a
remnant of influence from what my mother used to always tell me."
She'll just see this as a funny comment, related to the subject at hand.
But what you've really done is give yourself an ability to bring up an
important subject later on.... Like if she does something inexplicable or
apparently irrational later on, you can say, "hmmm... is it possible that
22

this is your personal umbrella issue?" She probably won't know what
you're talking about,

23

unless she's really sharp. If she doesn't know what you're referring to,
then you say something like "remember how I was telling you about how
I have these impulses that are based on things my family told me rather
than what is realistic?" This makes it much easier for her to think about
that topic in your presence, because it was brought up in such a casual
and funny manner and because it was a link to something that was
brought up before.
I could go on for dozens of pages about this topic alone. You can and
should use this powerful technique so that no matter what issue or
barrier might arise, you can make a reference to something that was
discussed beforehand. This is infinitely better than asking her direct
questions that instruct her to delve into her personal space and give
something to you. Instead, it makes her feel like going into her personal
reasons for doing things is part of the development of the conversation.
It simply takes the pressure off of her and allows you to be more
invasive.
Here are some examples of conversational traps I have successfully
used to establish real rapport, break down her barriers, and set her up
for the most powerful seduction model:
1)

"That reminds me of a conversation I was having with my

brother, since he just had a kid, about the best way to raise my
nephew." Of course, if we get into the discussion right there, I
can learn a heck of a lot about her value system, what she
24

prioritizes and cares about, and what her idea is of her past
and future self as it relates to family issues or other common
obstacles. But if we don't get into the discussion then, I can

25

bring it up later by relating it to something she says. E.g.,

she'll say something totally mundane like "I don't like watching
tv much." And I'll respond by saying, "yeah, when my brother
and I spoke about his raising my nephew we spoke in detail
about the effects of tv on kids." Since it's the second time I'm
bringing up the conversation, it's almost guaranteed that we'll
discuss the topic in greater detail. And even though in this
example, we will begin by talking about whether growing up
with tv is good, the real strength of the technique is that I start
getting her to invoke and describe her own childhood memories
and I can easily get her to talk about her attitudes and values
by branching out the discussion so it relates to other things that
my brother and I supposedly discussed.
You see, women really want to talk about these things,
but they will only do it if it feels comfortable, natural and safe.
What I've done is make it seem comfortable and natural, and
by bringing up the conversation in the context of my own
family, it seems safe to her to discuss her own opinions and
experience. This uses the power principle of reciprocation, e.g.
if you reveal something (and she doesn't view you as a needy
weakling who isn't worth her attention), she is likely to feel as
if she should reveal something too.
One of the reasons why this particular conversational
26

trap is so effective is because family and past influences are

critical in a woman's development of barriers or general rules
for intimacy. If you get her to

27

discuss her family and she feels like she's learning something
about her past while she's talking about it, she will enter an
altered statethe most powerful trance state you can access.
As I'll discuss later, it's important that you don't direct the
conversation in a manner that makes it seem like you're
becoming her therapist. Make it so that it seems like you're
trading information and giving her a chance to talk about
things that matter to her. Never spend too much time
exclusively delving into her pastotherwise you'll start to fulfill
an unwanted role. You will need to assert yourself and bring up
plenty of random comments to take her off track when the flow
of the conversation doesn't favor your objectives.
"That experience put me into a state of flow". Here, I'm
setting up a conversation about optimal states. It is somewhat
similar to Ross's discussion about 'biissnosis', but the
difference is that 'flow' is based on academic clinical
psychology and not some new age sounding thing, just in case
she's one who might disrespect the self-help world (or at least
a man's participation in it). If you're trying to raise your
esteem in her eyes, talking about psychological research about
how people become happy and experience optimal states is a
good thingshe'll perceive you as an interesting person who
spends his time reading about sophisticated topics. Referring
28

to something you learned in a self-help course might end up

making you look like something of a wuss.

29

Flow is a field of study pioneered by this professor of

psychology at the University of Chicago. He was trying to
figure out what puts people in their optimal states, where
one's sense of time is off, all distractions fall into the
background, etc. It's like how a chess mater can focus on a
single move for hours without realizing that the time has
passed. If you want to learn more about this topic, you should
read Flow, the Psychology of Optimal Experience. It is a rare
woman who doesn't enjoy talking about this topic. And the
thing is, it gives you the opportunity to really nail her with the
most powerful SS tools. You get her to recall experiences
where she's experienced her most optimal state. She'll want to
do this. Most people want to add something to the
conversationif you're going on about this academic subject
which really has to do with our everyday experiences, she's
going to want to participate to make herself feel like she's
adding something and is intelligent. And you will give her an
automatic way to participate by telling her how. Once you start
to flesh out what her optimal experience was in the past, you
can use all the tools of speed seduction, e.g. demonstrating
understanding, anchoring, putting in commands that relate to
you, etc.
"It's like we're characters in a movie". This one is remarkably
30

powerful. First of all, it's somewhat ambiguous. What do I

mean by 'we'? Is it the generic 'we' or does it mean the two of
us, as an exclusive couple? I'll make this comment when
something unusual happens in the

31

environment when we're talking or if anything unusual is

brought up in our discussion. This gives me an opportunity to
later talk about this 'movie' we're in. And I get her to
contribute about what is in the movie, what happens, and what
the underlying themes are.
The wonderful part of this trap is that it sets up a
discussion where I can directly get her to co-create a movie
about the two of us, and I am given the power as a director in
this movie. This also gives me access to how she processes her
images. It's a direct way to access her submodalities, as Ross
would put it. The actual conversation where you are creating
this movie together is something she will likely enjoy, because
it gives her a chance to be creative and imaginative. It's the
same principle that underlies women's obsession with artists.
They love to live vicariously and feel a part of this creative
world that the man has created. She wants to be a part of this
world of creativity and imagination. You are giving her the
chance to do just this.
This, of course, is the key to seducing hercapturing her
imagination, and most of all directing it. The purpose of your
conversation trap is to make it seem normal to her that you
think in this vivid manner. If she realizes that you process your
ideas and what you hear in a visual and audio and dynamic
32

fashion, it will seem more normal when you ask her to

participate in your creation that involves the two of you. Since
I assume that you have an advanced

33

understanding of speed seduction, I leave it to you to come up

with seduction themes and language in your movie discussion.
"That reminds me of 'name work of literature.'" If you're
dealing with a woman who is an expert in literature, you can't
use this. The last thing you want to do is enter into a territory
that she will best you in. Instead, you want to make feel like
you have something to add. But at the same time, you're also
giving yourself an opening to directly talk about seduction
themes in a non-threatening manner. She'll also likely be
flattered to comparisons or even discussions that compare her
ideas or behavior to works of literature. This is the equivalent to
reading a woman poetry, but it is much better, because by
setting the conversational mine, you give yourself the license to
describe in detail seductive themes and bring up things that
you've picked up from reading. You can also set up discussions
of how what she's said or how she's behaved relates to a good
movie you've seen or a song you've heard.
Think of what's easier for a woman to discuss. She can
respond to a direct question about what she finds seductive or
attractive, which will make her feel incredibly uncomfortable.
Or you can give her the chance to give you her perspective on
what characters in a particular movie are feeling when they're
falling in love. Almost invariably, she'll draw on her love
34

experience and value system. This is an easy way to

35

indirectly and even directly talk about seductive topics. Let

me give you an example.
Early in the conversation, I'll say something mundane like,
"did you see the Oscars?" I'll make a comment about how I
wish "Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon" had won the award for
best picture. If she wants to talk about the movie right then
and there, then fine, I go directly into the discussion. But the
point is that I've set a trap. She knows that I think highly of the
movie, but she has no idea that I plan on discussing the movie
at some point in a deeply seductive manner. Anyhow, if she's
not interested in talking about the movie right then, I wait until
a point in the conversation where I feel like she'll be more open
to go into a topic in greater detail.
Then when something random comes up, I'll make a
comparison to Crouching Tiger, e.g. "yeah, that man has no
patiencenothing like that guy in Crouching Tiger. Do you
remember how Chow Yun Fat had spent his life loving Michelle
Yoeh?" Then I'll let her go on for a while about what she
thought. I'll say some random things back before I barrage her
with seductive theme.
I'll say, for example, "Like every minute, he felt an
overwhelming desire and deep warmth and love for her to the
point where his entire being radiated and glowed with an
36

energy generated from his true love, but he refused to act

upon that feeling all his life, up until the point before death
where he realized he wasted his life by not acting upon

37

that love? I mean can you imagine that? You feel a deep and almost
magical connection with a man to the point where your face becomes
flush and you tingle with excitement every time you're close to him.
[pointing at yourself]. But for some reasonbecause of family, because
of honor, you deprive yourself, and then on the brink of death, you
realize that you have forgone the most important and true thing in your
life?"
If you understand SS, you understand that I'm bringing her into that
state of feeling what true love is like. This should be pretty easy if she
saw the movie, since she'll be dually thinking of her own experience
and the movie (which would've probably evoked some intense emotions
in her). Then I'm getting her to think about how painful it is to not act
on something that she could find out in the future is true love. This
involves negative conditioning, and also time warping.
Moreover, I am also creating an artificial shared experience between
the two of us. Why do women love to watch these romance films? Well
they love to live vicariously and feel as if they are the protagonist who
is winning her true love, just the kind that she deserves. It's the same
principle that makes thuggish men want to see violent films. If you can
get a woman to recall a romantic movie that she loved, and if you can
talk about it in a way that brings back the experience and you can
discuss it in her language, then it's as if you're
sharing that experiencealmost as if you were sitting next to her in the
38

theater, or even better, as if you were both characters in the film.

There's so much more I can do with this Crouching Tiger example.
For instance, I can say, "isn't it interesting how the different love stories
give people different things to relate to in that movie. Like on the one
hand you have Chow Yun Fat and Michelle Yoeh, which involved this
long lasting respect, admiration, and true love which was reciprocated
but never acted upon, [expand and add seductive themes]. And then
you had Zhang Ziyi (the young woman) and the rogue warrior, a wild
heated romance of violent passion where it wasn't so much mutual
temperate respect, but the need to possess and the need to throw
yourself into something dangerous and explosive. Like remember that
scene where he was taking that splinter out of her foot and how
seductive that washow she was experiencing intense physical pain,
but submitting to him in an overtly sexual wayand how she stabbed
him before they suddenly embraced and started kissing passionately
and rolling around then having sex. [again, you can expand and
elaborate]. And finally, you had this brewing possibility of a romance
with Chow Yun Fat and Zhang Ziyi, where this fascination between a
master and pupil was developing. Like Zhang Ziyi was the undisciplined
girl with tremendous talent ability, someone full of possibilities
possibilities and potential that fascinated and drew Chow Yun Fat to her.
And with Zhang Ziyi, there was a real draw of his poise, his wisdom,
and his ability to be a self-entity, unlike the rogue warrior [blah, blah,
39

blahadd more seduction themes].

The brilliant part of this conversation is that you present different
models of romance and falling in love. She will most likely focus on one
of them, the one which she finds most exciting or compelling in her life.
Then you can really explore that theme and describe the scenes in a
really seductive manner. It's like presenting her with a choose-yourown-seduction path/adventure. You are laying traps within the trap.
This is just one example. Potentially, you could talk about seductive
topics the whole time, while she believes she's just having a high
quality conversation about movies, books, music, or whatever. Of
course, you need to do your research before you use this technique.
Otherwise, you'll just come across as dim witted.
I suggest focusing on the romance film technique. You must do your
research and watch these movies and spend time understanding them
and figuring out how to talk about them. Tons of women enjoy When
Harry Met Sally, Sleepless in Seattle, and Pretty Woman. These are
pretty awful movies, but what can you do? If the woman is more
intelligent, then she might like Shadowlands. Remains of the Day,
Casablanca or perhaps even Breathless. Figure out how to discuss these
films in a seductive manner. It will give you an instant in. One
cautionmake sure that you retain a certain level of dismissiveness
when you do thisotherwise she'll probably think that you're a little too
girly.
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Yes, this is similar to Ross's advice to tell stories, read

poetry or whatever. But it's infinitely better, because the
woman will respect you more based on your insight, she will
has access to what you're talking about (i.e. if she hasn't seen
the movie, she definitely will), and it gives her more of an
opportunity to participate and reveal herself to you.

Step Three
Identify those barriers and begin to peer over them.
So you've laid the groundwork. She has some level of respect for
you and is intrigued to a certain degree by what you have to say. And
you've laid the foundation for being able to bring up random topics as
well as bring up topics that have already come up before. Now is the
time to address the barriers preventing you from developing a special
relationship with her. First, you must find out what they are before you
can break down those barriers and get her to think differently.
Much of this has to do with going back to topics that you've brought
up when laying down your seduction mines. The discussions you will
eventually have will simultaneously put her into a receptive trance state
and substantively break down her barriers. In order to do this, you
have to figure out what triggers her interest or causes her to react the
most. You've already brought up a number of topics with your
seduction mines, so when you bring them up again, is it easy to
41

get her to talk about the topic or is she less receptive or interested? If
she is interested, you can delve into the area to find out what her
sticking points are.
For example, there was one situation where I brought up something
about my parents, and she became very interested and started asking
about whether my parents care about what kind of person I date. This is
the easiest case. She's giving me a direct opening to talk about this area
of her life and is indicating what her issues might be. If she's not so
forthcoming, I could make another reference to my umbrella problem
and talk about another such problem. I could then bring up a funny
story about growing up, and then I could ask her an open-ended
questiondid you ever have anything like that happen to you when you
were growing up? Then I would listen intently to see how she
characterizes her childhood.
I'm not trying to be a psychiatrist, nor am I pretending that I can
truly understand her complex past. Rather, I'm getting hints as to what
I should do when I'm crafting seduction themes. If she talks fondly of
her childhood and laughs at things that she and her parents and siblings
used to do, she probably highly values that type of tranquility, peace
and security in family life. So when I go into my seduction theme, I'm
going to focus on those values and feelings that are associated with
happiness in the family. On the other hand, if she talks about conflict
and people who are unreasonable, I'm going to focus my seduction
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theme on overcoming conflict and resolving problemsescaping

negativity.
Another example is one where I determined that the subject of my
seduction seemed to be limited by what she considered to be the
boundaries of her personality. I realized that in order for her to allow
herself to be seduced by me, she would have to do things that she
wouldn't otherwise do. To first put her in this risk taking state, I started
doing slightly unorthodox things. For example, I would talk to
strangers and minimally involve her in the conversation. This
demonstrated to her that we could behave in a way that went beyond
her comfort zone and the results would be positive or at least would not
involve any painful consequences. I then segued into a seduction theme
that involved risk taking. I asked her to recall a time where she
overcame a fear, describing the prior state as one of paralysis, like
she's so nervous that she becomes someone who is not herself (note
that I'm suggesting that her risk taking self is closer to her real self). I
asked her to recall how invigorating and wonderful it felt to know that
looking back, the obstacle or barrier that prevented her from taking a
risk was not realthat she could overcome it and experience whatever
there is to offer in lifeall of the possibilities. Then I involved some
time distortion, saying how great it would feel to be in a place in the
future where she knows she's taken all the opportunities life has thrown
her way and she would have no regrets, and looking back to this point
43

in time, she would know that she made an important decision to

overcome these obstacles that she would later discover were merely
illusory.
You'll want to do this for the major areas in which she might have
erected barriers preventing her from letting you in. As I've stated,
these barriers include her morals, family, social influences, inertia, and
her personality patterns. I leave it to you to craft the specific manner in
which you access these potential barriers.

But the general principle is the same. Relate a statement and an open
ended question to something that you've previously mentioned. And
then listen for her trigger words and emphasis, which you'll use as the
groundwork for your seduction thesis.
Obviously when you start to develop these seduction themes, you
should use all the skills you've learned in SS. The best one to use is
time warping, especially when dealing with her past. If she had a happy
upbringing and has cherished memories of the past, then you can talk
about how memories work, and just as she is now looking back on the
past and keeping that as a part of herself, that someday, she'll look
back to the way things are now, and hopefully she will have made the
right choices so that she can look back just as fondly. Certainly you're
going to want to lace this description with embedded commands and a
more detailed description of what you think should consist of her
44

memories she's currently creating. This is just an example.

One caution. Be sure to watch for the difference between boredom
and reluctance. For example, if I bring up in the conversation again the
topic about my brother raising his kid, if it's something that she seems
reluctant to talk about, then I can safely assume that something about
her life in that area makes it difficult for her to talk about it. I have
identified a potentially huge barrier. And with every barrier, I see great
potential. Because the person who can peer over the barrier is the one
who will gain her devotion.

45

This step is probably the toughest one. This is where you can
potentially scare her off, but it's also where she can start to really gain a
sense of devotion to you, the one who truly understands her.
Step four
Now you have already discovered what some of her barriers are, and
you have talked to her in a seductive manner that relates to the key
themes of those barriers. She should really start to get a sense that you
understand her. You will pace this whole process by interjecting things
that are irrelevant, just to keep her anticipating what you have to say.
Once you're satisfied that she's in a state where she's really starting
to open herself up, you go pull out the big guns.
First, you throw out a number of 'specific generics.' As I've stated
before, there are a number of things that are almost invariably true
about people, even though they believe that thing is a unique attribute
or experience.
One example is "did you ever dream about becoming an actress
when you're growing up?" This is true of almost any woman, actually.
However, especially when she's caught up with how well she's being
understood, she will think that you're reading her mind. This makes her
ripe for the ultimate seduction technique. The 'actress' example works
particularly well with shy girls. Most shy girls have dreams of being
something that they're notsomeone who can project her greatness
and become the center of attention. But they're afraid to do this in real
1

life, and often they're even afraid to reveal that aspiration. I once used
this specific generic on a woman, and she couldn't believe itshe
thought I was reading her mind and just stared at me with her mouth
wide open, saying 'how did you know? How did you know?" "I just did,"
I responded.
Another specific generic is "do you sometimes feel like people just
aren't understanding where you're coming from?" Alternatively, "do you
feel like sometimes, people aren't really listening?" Well this is obviously
true. People in general pay very little attention to others. She'll probably
have picked up on this in her own experience. The benefit of this
specific generic is that she'll also make sure to listen more carefully to
you.
Yet another specific generic is "do you sometimes wonder what
it'd be like if you just left everything and everybody behind and started
anew?" Well everyone thinks about this. And I'm certainly not trying to
say that women are unintelligent and gullible and will think you're
reading their mind if you say this at any point. In fact, if you say this
right off the bat, she'll probably say, "yeah, doesn't everyone think
about that?" However, if you've put her in a state where she's already
fascinated and somewhat in a trance and have demonstrated
understanding, then she'll give your statement a very generous and
liberal interpretation. And all of the sudden, you become this authority
who really understands things and mysteriously knows who knows
2

what.
And even another specific generic is, "do you sometimes feel
disappointed by people." Same principle. Invariably true. But people
are prone to thinking they're more unusual than they really are. This
includes all of us, of course.
Now that you've done that, it's time for the really deadly
seduction. Keep in mind, you do this after you've already loosened her
up, you've identified her potential barriers, you've figured out
something about seduction themes to develop, you've already launched
into barrier breaking seduction themes, and you've presented yourself
as someone mysterious, unpredictable, but intelligent and full of
incredible wisdom and insight. Now it's time to lower the boom.
It's triple threat time distortion. The most powerful technique of
SS is time distortion. But what I've developed here is much more than
just having someone imagine an outcome as if it had already happened
or thinking about and reviving the past in the mind. The basic idea is
that you take the most powerful ideas and themes you've been able to
ascertain about her past (especially her childhood); her current
conception of who she is as an individual, her limits and strengths
included; and her ideal future selfthe way that she thinks she will be
and the way she'd ideally like to be. Take all of these elements, wrap
them up and create a synthetic whole, a complete picture capturing all
of these things, casting it in the most coherent, clear, strong, and
3

brilliant light in a place that goes beyond time and spacea place that
lies in the nexus between reality and imaginationwhere imagination
and fantasythe most uninhibited creativity, intelligence, and spirit of
her mind, heart, and soul become eternal. Yes, it's vague, but
intentionally vague. Basically, you are helping her to achieve a concept
of self that is incredibly powerful, yet resonant with her being.
Let's step back for a moment. Why am I doing what I'm doing
here? 1 am addressing a core problem that addresses what prevents
people from being happy. Most people in our culture are not as happy
as they could be. We all know this but choose not to acknowledge it in
our daily existence. There are a number of reasons why we aren't
happy, but one of the main reasons is that our society pushes us based
on economic constraints and social pressures to behave in ways and
make choices that aren't consistent with how we conceive ourselves
and how we developed as individuals.
There are those of us who are able to adapt is a way that doesn't
stray too far from what we've been, who we are, and what we want to
be. Those people are comparably happy. There are the lucky few who
have been blessed with the proper gifts or even encouragement, or
perhaps they've just figured it out and have the right psychology and
have lived life to the absolute fullest. But then there are the majority of
people who have been trained to not demonstrate or explore the full
extent of our creativity and individuality. Our aspirations are quashed
4

before we even had a chance to get started living out our dreams.
To the extent that this is all true for you, it is three times as true
for women. Our society places so many expectations and limitations on
women's growth. The opportunities to be a certain type of person, live a
certain type of life, and be in a certain type of relationship are severely
restricted due to pressures from family, society, peers, media, etc. If
you have gone through the first three steps of this seduction method,
you will have already uncovered and addressed some of these barriers.
You should not underestimate the constraints that women subjectively
feel.
Every man who wants to understand women should read the
book Reviving Ophelia, written by Mary Pipher. It is a book that
talks about the development of self in adolescent girls and how
various pressures impair and even cripple a young woman's sense
of self and possibility. Obviously I strongly oppose anyone trying to
seduce an adolescent. But it should be clear to you that a woman is
the product of her past development.
Just as you may have adapted to fit in and to become a productive
member of society, a woman you are trying to seduce almost invariably
has encountered tons of sexist bs, has been inundated with messages of
her limits, etc. The whole idea of your seduction should be to present to
her the opportunity of going back to that time when she went from
being a carefree, fearless young girl, full of life and possibility to a
5

jaded, conforming young woman, whose actions are dictated by

someone else's expectations, her fears, worries, and concerns.
If you can seamlessly connect this state of mind and link it to her
current statethe way she sees herself, and her prospective stateher
ideal self which perhaps relates to the way she was as a child, you have
created narrative integrity in her life. In other words, her life will seem
to make senseit will be coherent with a compelling story, rather than
being a patchwork of decisions made without reflection. This is why this
technique is so dangerous. Why wouldn't a woman love a man who
could make her feel this way? I really believe that this technique
provides men the ability to give a wonderful gift to women and can help
them undo some of the unfairness and ridiculousness that exists in our
society relating to attitudes towards women.
So how do you do this? Well you've already laid down the
groundwork. It's now up to you to weave together a narrative using
what you have learned, interjecting lush descriptions, embedded
commands, trance words, etc. There is no one way to do this, and in
fact, I advise against coming up with a canned method, because the
spontaneity of putting things together for an individual cannot be
replaced. However, you can arm yourself with general ideas. The best
one I've come up with so far is as follows.
I ask her whether she's seen the movie Afterlife. It's a Japanese
movie that came out within the last couple of years. It's an excellent
6

film that you should see. Anyhow, if she hasn't seen it, I tell her it's
premise: that after you die, you enter this place between earth and
heavenit looks like a barren and empty place and it's like that for a
reasonbecause they want to give you an opportunity to be by yourself
and understand what is important to you. Your opportunity in this place
is to come up with a single memory that signifies your life, and it is that
single memory that you are allowed to take into the afterlife. You spend
your time in this empty place deciding what that memory is and then
creating a movie, an exact replica of that memory.
This is a fantastic example. It applies what I call the pink elephant
principle. That is, if I ask you to not think of a pink elephant, you
wouldn't be able to do it. Just the same, as I describe how individual
characters in the movie came up with their memories, it is impossible
for her to not think of her own, most treasured memory. And it's easy
and natural to segue into that discussion, i will say that I was thinking
about what mine would be. And then I'd describe one possible memory,
using tactile, visual, auditory descriptions. 1 would then offer her the
opportunity to discuss her memory or at least try to think of one.

She might be shy at first, but once she really starts to think about
it and go back in time to think of that treasured memory, it's not that
hard to get her to describe that memory in detail. And within the
context of the discussion, it's appropriate to ask her about the sounds,
7

the sights, the colors, and feelings of that memoryyou can even be
playful and pretend that she is in the afterlife and you are one of the
directors who is responsible for reenacting the memory. When you're
doing this, you have the opportunity to help her draw out that
memoryyou become a co-director, helping her arrange the pieces so
that everything falls into place. Obviously, it will be very easy for you to
use submodalities, embedded commands, etc. when you are doing this.
Then the next thing I do is suggest that it would be cool if instead
of having a single memory, you could have a short film strip that
represented your life. Like it can start out with a memory from
childhood, blend into a present memory, and then go into the future
and depict something her ideal future self and life. You then assist her
in putting this together, weaving it into a seamless narrative, capturing
the underlying themes and common denominators and interjecting your
voice, your symbolic self, and your energy to piece it all together as the
glue of her new personal narrative. And once you do this, you have her
visualize that movie, that filmstrip wrapping up into an orb of energy,
that's so powerful that it surrounds the two of you, and extends
penetrating luminescent rays of light throughout, bursting within (make
sure when you do this you use ambiguous language so you include
yourself into the experience). Basically, you're taking that narrative and
using techniques of hypnosis and SS to link that

feeling to you. Anchor that feeling and then let her know how easy it is
for you to create that energy, that feeling together.
I've left out the particular language and many of the particular SS
tools that you would insert, but the general idea is there, and it is that
general model that is truly powerful.
If you successfully adhere to this seduction method, you will win
the woman's respect, admiration, intrigue, attraction, and even thanks
for making her feel like she never hasa whole and eternal being.
As with any powerful technique, its application can be dangerous.
I strongly oppose any exploitation of women, but think that this
technique could give men who really have a lot to offer the chance to
share something or provide something really special to someone who
deserves it.