PAGE 17
THE ONTARION TAKES A STAND
Page 7
STEROIDS AT
WATERLOO
161.12
Out of town ‘Yes’ CSA supports ‘No’ with
campaigners fill campus a majority vote
DANIEL BITONTI
According to the organizers of
the ‘No’ campaign, they shouldn’t
be here. It’s a Guelph issue, with
Guelph dollars, they say, so why
then are students from York and
the University of Ottawa canvassing
along Winegard Walk or in the
library, informing students on the
reasons why they should vote ‘Yes’
on continued membership in the
Canadian Federation of Students
(CFS)?
For the ‘Yes’ campaigners, it’s
simple: their presence on campus is
a sign of solidarity.
“I am so happy to see York
students on our campus and Ryerson
students on our campus to explain
why it’s important to work together.
I am so happy that they took time
off from their days either from their
unions or their studies to come and
talk to us and explain their process,”
said Denise Martins, the incoming
external commissioner for the CSA,
who has been actively campaigning
for the ‘Yes’ side.
But Martins says that student
canvassers from other campuses have
received a negative response by some
University of Guelph students.
“I am frustrated at the hostility
that students from outside our
campus have been facing on our
campus… the fact that they’re
getting heckled and the fact that
they’re getting yelled at, the fact
that lies are being spread about
them getting paid,” she said. “This
is not true. A large portion are here
devoting their time to talk to us and
it just really frustrated me to see the
negative attitude a lot of students are
taking.”
Starting April 7, voting began on
continued membership in CFS. Up
until April 6, an active ‘Yes’ and ‘No’
campaign was visible across campus:
in the UC courtyard, for example,
both ‘Yes’ and ‘No’ campaign stations
were set up where students could
be provided with the competing
arguments. Both campaigns
registered with the Referendum
Oversight Committee (ROC) prior
>
SEE “CAMPAIGN,” PAGE 4
www.theontarion.com Apr. 8 - 14, 2010
SEE PAGE 10
the issues this week
BOOKS FOR
3 AFRICA
NICOLE ELSASSER affairs commissioner for the
CRAIG
At a March 31 board of CSA, chaired the March 31 board
directors meeting, the Central
Student Association (CSA)
voted to support the ‘No’ side
meeting and therefore did not
vote, but said that the main reason
the CSA broke their neutrality
5 CARDIFF
in the referendum on continued stance was in the spirit of fairness SPORTS
membership in the Canadian
Federation of Students (CFS).
This effectively allows the CSA to
for both sides.
“Both CFS and CSA are student
organizations. Students pay to both
8 INJURIES
use their organization’s resources the CFS and the CSA,” explained
CELEBRITY
16 SEX ADDICTS
to campaign to discontinue Armstrong. “CFS is paying for the
membership in the CFS. ‘Yes’ campaign, meaning students
The referendum is the result are paying for the ‘Yes’ campaign.
of a recent court battle between The CSA [was] not campaigning
the CSA and the CFS, after a for the ‘No’ campaign, therefore
requested referendum was halted students [were] not paying for INDEX
by the CFS; both the federal and the ‘No’ campaign. Which means
provincial factions of the lobbying there was not an equal allocation Arts & Culture 
group claimed that there were of resources. That was one point Sports & Health 
issues with the petitions that had for taking a stand, that is leveling Life 
initiated the referendum. the resource allocation.”
Opinion 
The motion to end the CSA’s Denise Martins, another CSA
neutrality stance and take a side in board of directors member and Editorial 
the referendum was hotly debated, the incoming external affairs Crossword 
passing with a 16 to 7 majority, commissioner, voted to maintain Comics 
with some board members the CSA’s neutrality stance and Classified 
abstaining from the vote. said that it was a mistake to do Community Listings 
Gavin Armstrong, the
communication and corporate
>
SEE “BOARD,” PAGE 3
 www.beatgoeson.com

e w Vinyl
N in
now k!
stoc

Top 10 Albums This Week


THE ONTARION 161.12
What to do with your old textbooks
Student organizers
request that unused
textbooks should
go to Africa
ALDIS BRENNAN
Beginning last week on April
5, a number of book receptacles
could be spotted in the University
Center courtyard, the Bullring,
and the Co-op Bookstore. These
bins are for the Books for Africa
book drive.
The Books for Africa
organization is dedicated to the
collecting, sorting, shipping, and
distribution of donated books
to children in Africa. While the
book’s final destination is the non-
profit Books for Africa, there is an
intermediary: Better World Books
(BWB). BWB describes itself as a
for-profit social venture, meaning
that it makes money in order to
supply revenue for its non-profit
affiliates such as Books for Africa.
It is BWB that is responsible for
organizing book drives such as
the one here at the University of
Guelph.
Jasmine Sereda, one of the
student organizers of the event,
explained the process.
“We collect textbooks during
the exam period, because that is
when students no longer need their
books, and we ship the acceptable
ones to Better World Books in the
U.S,” said Sereda. “They decide
which ones to send to Books for
Africa and which ones to sell
online to make money for Books
Board of directors votes to provide resources for campaign to leave the CFS
<
CONTINUED FROM COVER
otherwise.
“The CSA has been taking
a neutral stance this entire time
and then they turn around and
say ‘we’re not neutral anymore,’
when it’s convenient for [some]
individuals’ purpose,” said
Martins. “I feel like the neutrality
stance was used a lot to silence a
lot of people and now it’s being
used to justify the fact that student
resources were being used to push
forward this campaign against the
CFS.”
Dave Molenhuis, the national
treasurer for the CFS, has been
on campus speaking to students
during the campaigning and said
he continues to get support from
CSA board members despite last
week’s vote.
“There has definitely been an
outpouring of support from a
number of the board members in
favour of continued membership
in the federation, and as well
the majority of new executive
members also support continued
membership and have been
campaigning very actively on
campus for the past couple of
weeks,” said Molenhuis.
Despite this support from
certain board members, Martins
believes that by the CSA using
its resources to campaign for
a particular side, they’re not
equalizing the debate but rather
Books for Africa asks students to donate their unused textbooks to
help increase literacy in various African countries. Drop boxes in the
University Centre, the Bullring, and the Co Op bookstore are in place
to make donating easier for students.
for Africa.”
Sereda also outlined why the
organization sends books to Africa
rather than money or some other
essential resource.
“We’re students. We don’t
have a lot of money. But we do
have books,” explained Sereda.
“Sometimes we can’t sell them
back to the bookstore or on the
Cannon. Unless we decide that a
effectively dictating how students
will vote.
Armstrong, however, disagrees.
We’re not telling
students how to
vote. We’re taking
a ‘No’ stance. If
students look to us
and they follow our
messaging, then
that’s up to them but
we’re not forcing all
of our members to
vote ‘No.’ We don’t
operate like that.
Gavin Armstrong
CSA communications and
corporate affairs commissioner
“We’re not telling students
how to vote,” said Armstrong.
“We’re taking a ‘No’ stance. If
students look to us and they
follow our messaging, then that’s
up to them but we’re not forcing
all of our members to vote ‘No.’
We don’t operate like that.”
Julia Shonfield
certain book would be useful to
have in the future, it feels great to
give the gift of education to some
that might not get it otherwise.”
The piles of leftover textbooks
that a student accrues over his or
her university career are certainly
formidable. Even assuming that
one book is required for each and
every class in a four year program
and that five classes are taken a
The CFS has become a presence on campus during the period leading up
to the referendum by manning tables which seek to provide students
with information about the services they offer such as the ISIC.
semester, this amounts to 40 books.
University of Guelph student Alan
Bauer understands this situation
well.
“I have about fifty books just
sitting in my closet that I don’t
need or want anymore,” said Bauer.
“I can’t even justify selling them. A
first year philosophy textbook cost
over a hundred dollars and I only
made four dollars back selling it.
This [Books for Africa] campaign
seems like a good way to get rid
of unused and space-hogging
textbooks by giving them to people
who really need them.”
As for whom the books actually
go to, this is determined by Books
for Africa after they receive what is
left over from what BWB couldn’t
sell. According to Books for Africa
itself, the books go to children
of 13 different African countries
such as Sierra Leone, Rwanda, and
Uganda, to name a few.
This effort to increase the
literacy of people all over Africa
is no easy task and even at the
local level, Books for Africa needs
help. Organizers such as Sereda
encourage those interested in
volunteering, donating, or just
asking questions to email them
at uogbfa@gmail.com before the
event ends on the April 23.
Rashaad Bhamjee
NEWS
3
Scrabble considered too
hard
With many people claiming
that the popular Mattel board
game is too difficult, the next
edition of Scrabble to be released
will allow for proper nouns to
be permitted in play. The game
formerly allowed players to get
points (anywhere from one to ten
points per letter in each word) for
any words found in the Collin’s
dictionary, but banned players
from using proper nouns. With
the hope of encouraging more
families and younger players to
enjoy the game, the makers of
Scrabble have made the decision
to allow for the names of places,
people, companies and brands to
be included in play with the hope
that a pop culture element will be
attractive to new players. Along
with the new edition of the game,
Mattel will continue to offer the
old edition for those that feel that
they can compete under the old
rules. (BBC News)
Unpaid internships may
be illegal
Oftentimes for young adults,
the only way to gain the type of
work experience necessary to
advance their careers is to take an
unpaid internship. With the rise of
companies using unpaid interns to
perform necessary tasks normally
performed by paid employees,
labour departments in the United
States are running investigations
and discovering that many
companies are in fact breaking
labour laws with their interns.
One investigator even went so
far as to say that if an intern is
working for a for-profit company
and is offered no compensation,
then this is likely a violation.
Prospective interns should be
aware that the only time an intern
can be unpaid is when they’re
being provided with training akin
to that of a vocational institution,
when they are not taking the place
of a formerly paid employee, or
when they are not providing the
company any immediate benefit.
(New York Times)
Tiger Woods returns
with facial hair;
confusion ensues
Tiger Woods’ return to golf
was much anticipated after his
highly publicized philandering,
but some appear to be distracted
by the golf star’s freshly sprouted
facial hair rather than how he’ll
fair on the course. Experts have
weighed in suggesting that men
grow facial hair to save face after
a public embarrassment, citing
Al Gore’s beard after his loss in
the presidential race. Another
suggestion is that the goatee has
been considered a symbol of the
badass and that perhaps this is an
accessory of his newfound persona.
Another theory is that the facial
hair is being used as a diversion
to take the focus off of his sex
addiction. (Globe and Mail)
 4 NEWS
What can you do with $224,000?
With the referendum
underway, the CFS is
asked ‘show me the
money’
NICOLE ELSASSER
Denise Martins has been a
strong presence on the ‘Yes’ side
during the campaign period leading
up to the referendum on continued
membership in the Canadian
Federation of Students (CFS) on
the University of Guelph campus.
Martins, an avid CFS supporter
and incoming external affairs
commissioner for the Central
Student Association (CSA), has also
been going to classrooms to speak to
students about the benefits to being
part of a national student union with
a mandate to lobby the government
on the behalf of students.
According to Martins, she has
encountered many questions about
the various aspects of the CFS, but
a great deal of them have been about
money in particular.
The contribution from U of
G students to the CFS is more
than $224, 000 of a $7 million
dollar budget that the CFS works
with annually to run their many
programs. She explained that many
students have misconceptions about
where their money is going.
“A lot of what I’ve been hearing
is that there’s no transparency or
that you can’t see the budget [for
the CFS],” said Martins “Go to
the CSA office during office hours
and you will find that if you ask for
a budget from any CFS meeting in
the last 20 years, you will be given
one.”
Martins also explained that when
students do look at the budget, they
may continue to be unclear about why
money is spent on particular things.
“Someone came forward to
the ‘Yes’ table yesterday and asked
why we’re spending $150,000 on
translation,” said Martins. “We need
full-time translators. We are working
to lobby federal government. We
have francophone students as
well. We publish all our work in
both French and English. We’re a
bilingual country and we have to
understand that.”
Dave Molenhuis, the national
$ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $
$ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $
$ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $
$ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $
$ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $
Among other things, $224,000 can pay a semester’s tuition for 90 undergraduate students at the University
of Guelph.
treasurer for the CFS, has been everything from the money spent
on campus, speaking to students on research which helps to mobilize
about the work that the CFS does. members and puts research in
According to Molenhuis, the money the hands of politicians and the
that U of G students pay to the CFS campaigns and mobilization work
that the federation does. The entire
budget is the movement’s budget.
A lot of what I’ve It is the numeric manifestation of
that.”
been hearing is Martins, who is also a student
that there’s no at the U of G and contributes the
$7.17 per semester to the CFS, feels
transparency or that students are unclear, at times, on
that you can’t see the what they are paying the CFS to do.
“I think a lot of people are
budget [for the CFS] thinking of them as donations but I
think I’m paying them to lobby on
Denise Martins my behalf,” said Martins.
‘Yes’ campaigner With students being asked
to vote ‘Yes’ or ‘No’ on continued
membership with the CFS from
in their student fees goes into a pot April 7 to 9, the figure that U of
and then eventually funds the many G students contribute annually,
campaigns the organization runs. $224, 000, is being widely discussed.
“[The money] goes from the Because an amount of money
membership dues and then it goes this large is not one that many
into the democratically decided upon undergraduate students deal with
campaigns, services and lobbying often, or let alone have a clear
in the federation,” said Molenhuis. concept of, one Ontarion staffer
“The entirety of the budget is decided to put it in perspective for
arguably campaigns and advocacy… argument’s sake.
APR. 8 - 14, 2010 THEONTARION.CA
Campaign canvassers
<
CONTINUED FROM COVER
$ $ $ $ $ $
to the campaign period, adhering to
certain campaign protocols.
“Anyone campaigning had to
follow the campaign protocol and
the campaign protocol does not say
you have to be a university of Guelph
$ $ $ $ $ $ student to campaign,” said Gavin
Armstrong, a member of the ROC.
“There are a number of students
from across the country who are
here promoting the ‘Yes’ campaign.”
While the ‘No’ campaign
$ $ $ $ $ $
acknowledged the right of non-
Guelph students’ to be on campus,
members questioned the legitimacy
of their presence.
“This is a referendum that was
$ $ $ $ $ $ organized by Guelph students.
Guelph students signed on. Guelph
student paid the fees. Guelph
students did all the organizing.
And it’s important that when these
issues are presented to us it’s from
Guelph students. From people
we know. From people who know
our issues. Who know what are
Rashaad Bhamjee perspective is on issues,” said Curtis
Batuszkin, a ‘No’ campaigner and
the student responsible for starting
the referendum petition drive
in September. “They don’t know
our history of sustainability. They
WHAT CAN YOU DO don’t know our history regarding
WITH $224, 000? CSA services. They don’t know our
history regarding our human rights
background at the University. They
simply don’t know. How can they
t

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784 lbs of silver
come to this campus?”
For Dave Molenheuis, the CFS
national treasurer, the logic of ‘No’
t
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#FOUMFZ
campaigners simply doesn’t add up.
Continental GT “The fact of the matter is that
students who are members of the
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WJPMJO
federation want to continue to work
or a 13th century with students from Guelph through
their national student movement.
illuminated manuscript
And so I’m a bit confused as to why
that would be an issue,” he said.
t

BDSFT
PG
MBLFGSPOU
“Like myself, I’m here at the national
property in Nova Scotia capacity to answer questions student
might have about any issues or the
t
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TUBSWJOH
work the federation has done in the
African children for a year last couple of years… or the way
Guelph students have worked with
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UVJUJPO
GPS
other students across the province of
90 undergraduate students Ontario on the Drop Fees campaign
and worked with other students on
national campaigns.”
The campaign period is now
over and students will continue to
vote online until April 9.

THE ONTARION 161.12
Sitting on stage with Craig Cardiff
JOSH DOYLE
While most spent last Sunday
at home with ham and Easter eggs,
some of us spent it at Vinyl with
Craig Cardiff. Cardiff stopped by
Guelph for a live show the day
after performing in his hometown
of Waterloo, before heading back
to Ottawa where he now resides.
I was uncertain which held more
promise, family dinner or the show,
but was converted before Cardiff
ever struck a chord.
A small but spirited crowd of
music enthusiasts and folk lovers
huddled around the stage for a
show they knew held promise,
and was evidently worth skipping
dinner for. After a set by Robyn
Dell’unto, a regular songbird
whose comedic approach made her
a natural fit to open for Cardiff. I
had a chance to sit down with
Cardiff as he shared with me some
of his ideas on music.
“I do a lot of house concerts,
churches and prisons. I think all
of them are equally interesting,”
Cardiff said in response to how he
felt about more personal venues.
Cardiff explained that the space
is incidental so long as first and
foremost comes music.
“I just like places where people
make music or want to have music
made for them. I’ve always felt
pretty lucky to [be a part of ] that.”
As the dedicated group of fans
waited for him to start, most of
them were content to sit cross-
legged on the dirty floor of club
Vinyl, Craig made a small request.
“Could we rearrange ourselves
better? There’s lots of room up
here on the stage and beside me.
You guys are all back there in the
dark,” Cardiff said. And that was
Featured artist: Aislinn Thomas
I have known Aislinn
Thomas for a while now. We had
several classes together during
our undergrad and it is always
helpful to know where someone
is coming from and where they
might be going to. Yet, Thomas’
work has surpassed all of my
high expectation and she has
been producing work that firmly
plants itself on the fence between
cheeky/serious and sardonic/
sincere, and it’s wonderful.
For Thomas, her work has
traditionally been sincere and
honest. One might say that
sincerity and honesty are pillars
of not only her work, but her
personality as well.
Last year Thomas produced
Notes, a work that she views as
proposals or possibilities to the
universe. With this project,
Thomas employs sincerity to
attempt a way of making some
sort of connection; finding some
way to connect with something
else, or at least create something
else to connect with. She then
enlarged the notes and wheat
pasted them about town. With
ARTS & CULTURE
Waterloo’s Craig Cardiff played an intimate set at Vinyl last Sunday to an intimate group of 120
people.
how a handful of music lovers
came to sit on the stage beside
Cardiff, as he spent the next two
hours delivering a heart warming
catalog of songs to a crowd of
120. His call and response style of
involving the audience made it less
of a concert and more of a large
group of friends and strangers
getting together.
“The shows that I enjoy the
most happen in places where
it’s most intimate,” Cardiff said,
remarking on the smaller than
ordinary party that claimed the
floor. He didn’t expect anything
more from our city on Easter
the placement of posters and the
slightly large handwriting note
it is hard not to get drawn in and
read, there is something very
approachable and even inviting
about her work that you want to
be immersed in. It’s like a fine
wine or a book, except you don’t
have to read from start to finish
or get drunk.
Her recent works have been
a bit more tongue and cheek.
Thomas still maintains her
written/drawing style but has
added some lovely and subtle
humor. In one piece, she talks
about buying fake cigarettes to
be able to smoke and be apart of
something she is missing, without
the negative heath effects. In
another work, Thomas is simpler,
she creates a Shit Distribution
Diagram where on the left side
there is a circle with the words
“My Shit” in it and the right side
there is another circle with “Your
Shit” written in the centre and
where those two circles overlap
is “Our Shit.” A very poignant
and simple idea that summarizes
everything from relationships to
Sunday. But that didn’t stop him
from making jokes about ignoring
the phone calls of ambitious aunt’s,
and the excuses the audience must
have made in order to be there.
Cardiff involved his audience to
the point that they stopped being
an audience. A larger group would
have only taken away from the
solid relationship he formed with
the whole room. Cardiff explained
that what he does “requires a
smaller group. After two or three
hundred people it becomes a
different domain.”
“I feel like what I do is a
combination of music with an
life in general on a little 8.5 x 11
placket piece of paper.
Along the same lines of the
Shit Distribution Diagram is the
Eater Compatibility Portrait #1:
Rod, Peggy, Zach, Katie, Aislinn.
Thomas takes eating preferences
of her Dad, Mom, brother,
and herself and maps out diet,
preferences/restrictions. This
idea stemmed from relationships
(be it family, friends, romantic or
what have you) and how sharing
food or meals is such an integral
part of them and how completely
incongruent and random they
can be. Most of the time it’s a
funny joke, but it does hold some
insight to who a person is. Food
and food preference resonate on
such a personal level, there is so
much that can be said about food
as it is a very integral part of who
we are. It is also able transcend
the individual by being written
into our DNA as well as our
culture; it is something that is
both beyond us as well as being us
at the same time. Fantastic stuff.
-Miles Stemp
Travis Jon Allison
improvised element,” Cardiff said,
looking over the growing crowd.
His between song antics and
personable approach made it also
a comedy show, as Cardiff pulled
enough material out of the air to
have everyone in Vinyl laughing
hysterically. Needless to say, if you
were present last Sunday night,
you were entertained.
Cardiff is truly a pioneer of
independent music, giving a new
name to that scene by producing
upwards of 12 albums within
roughly the past 10 years. His
recent album, Mistletoe, was
“recorded entirely on an iPod
5
touch … and I think you should
buy three copies.”
Cardiff ’s successful attempt
at selling me on his new album
isn’t an isolated incident, and
his approach to playing music is
quite similar to his approach to
marketing that music. His vast fan
I do a lot of
house concerts,
churches and
prisons. I think
all of them
are equally
interesting.
Craig Cardiff
base exists mostly out of sheer love
for seeing him live, which speaks
to his word of mouth style of
promotion. He also praised Kevin
Priddle, the U of G student-DJ
and show promoter who put the
performance together for being
“excited about music, and making
music happen.”
Cardiff ’s philosophy seems to
hinge on the idea that music is a
joint effort, and takes the interest
of everyone to be truly successful.
I for one have no reservations to
being a part of any music that
sounds as good as Cardiff ’s, and
highly recommend you keep your
ear to the ground for when he
comes back next fall.
Top: Eater Compatability
Portrait #1: Rod, Peggy, Zach,
Katie, Aislinn
Above and left: From the
series Notes
 6 ARTS & CULTURE
Fixed gear bicycles
Look Ma, no brakes:
fixed gears and courier
culture
ZACK MACRAE
Elliott Allen’s day starts around
8:30am when his phone rings.
It’s his dispatcher. The phone call
tells him where he needs to travel
to pick up a package for delivery.
From there, Allen hops on his
bike and rips, because in his line
of work, time is money. Allen is
a bicycle courier in the hustle of
busy downtown Montreal. He
delivers packages on commission
for a living.
“The whole reason that bike
couriers are valuable as a service is
because they are faster than cars,”
said Allen about his job. Speed is
a huge factor for bike couriers who
need to go fast to make a living
wage. But, Allen has something
up his sleeve: a fixed gear bicycle
with no brakes and pedals that are
always turning.
A fixed gear bicycle, as bicycle
enthusiast Abe Levern explains
is “a bike in which the rear wheel
is always engaged and where it
doesn’t coast. So the pedals always
spin at the same rate as the rear
wheel.”
The mechanics of a fixed gear
bicycle are very simple and lie in
the back sprocket that is fastened
directly to the hub. Consequently,
when the back wheel turns, the
sprocket turns and runs the chain,
making the pedals revolve as a
result. On a fixed gear bike, as long
as the back wheel is spinning, so
are the pedals, and the rider has to
keep up with the demand of the
bike.
“What I really like about fixed
gears,” said Allen, “is the fact that
when the wheel is spinning you
always have to be pedaling, the bike
is always moving in proportion to
how much energy you are putting
in.”
Because the pedals never stop
moving, the rider is almost being
pushed by the bike, whereas on a
freewheel bicycle (a bicycle where
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coasting is possible) a rider has the
option to not pedal and put in less
energy for the speed in which they
are traveling.
But for all the energy a rider
puts into pedaling a fixed gear, he/
she must stop the bike as well, and
usually without brakes.
“Because there is no freewheel
mechanism and in my case, also
no brake,” said Allen, “you have to
be responsible for the speed you
create. All the energy you create,
you also have to get rid of.”
Now, you might think that
riding a bicycle without brakes
would be like riding a missile
down the street. But, control is one
of the reasons why riders in tight
metropolitan business districts use
fixed gears. Just as the rider pedals
the bike, he/she resists the pedals
to slow the rotation of the wheels.
Crowded downtown streets are
where fixed gears really pull their
weight.
“Fixed gears don’t really make
sense in the context of long
distance biking. They are meant
for having hyper control in tight
situations,” Allen explained. “You
become a lot more in tune with
the bike and what it’s doing when
you’re surrounded by cars and
people.”
As of late, in cities like Toronto
and Motreal, fixed gears have
become more of a fashion trend
then a practical tool for couriers
to get around the city efficiently.
But, if you need to get around the
city as quickly as possible, a fixed
Richard Masoner
gear bike, simple and aesthetically
pleasing, is the best option.
Although bicycle couriers have
been around for much longer
then fixed gear culture, the two
compliment each other.
The bike
is always
moving in
proportion
to how much
energy you
are putting
in.
Elliott Allen
For Allen, speed is a requisite,
and a fixed gear makes the
difference in his line of work. “Its
all about being faster then cars,”
said Allen. “The nature of the job
is almost inherently illegal because
if we want to make any money, we
have to get there fast, and if we
want to get there fast, we can’t be
obeying traffic laws.”
APR. 8 - 14, 2010
In this special edition of Sound
Check, we have for you The Rest,
a seven piece group hailing from
Hamilton, Ontario. But what
makes this week special is not
the CanCon-like plug, but the
particularly interesting way in
which The Rest decided to market
their new EP The Cried Wolf
Book by releasing it with a short
fictional book. In fact you can’t
even purchase the EP without
simultaneously buying the book
for $18 via the band’s own label,
Auteur. Some might call that
a pretty risky move for a band
with only 200K listens on their
MySpace site in an age where
the average listener’s attention
span is inversely proportional
to the number of songs on their
iPod. The Rest must realize this
reality and offer a free download
and read of the book at the cost
of junk email here: http://www.
auteurrecordings.com/therest/
criedwolf/index.html.
The book is about 14 “chapters”
(pages) of playful story separated
by title pages with corresponding
names from each song (in
reverse order from the EP). It’s
a picture book. The Rest credit
the mysterious MLXNDRSC for
the illustrations, whose childish-
but-dark style could be compared
with Gary Baseman (Teacher’s
Pet/Cranium), Maurice Sendak
(Where The Wild Things Are) or
Stanley Donwood (Radiohead’s
cover art). Not surprisingly,
the story is loosely based off of
the classic Aesop’s fable. It was
written by the lead singer/song
writer, Adam Bently, in the same
digressive, sinisterly humorous
manor in which the band’s
biography was written. As it states
in their bio, “The Rest have always
used the band as an outlet for all
sorts of creative explorations.”
Chalk this book up as more
evidence of that.
Unlike Bently’s writing,
The Rest’s lyrics and music are
surprisingly serious but it gives
them a sense of sincerity rather
than awkwardness. The Cried Wolf
THEONTARION.CA
THE REST
THE CRIED WOLF BOOK/EP
EP starts out with its titled track,
a slowed down (unintentional)
rendition of Radiohead’s “(Nice
Dream)” from 1995, whose riff
was even more blatantly stolen
in Pilate’s “Melt Into the Walls”
(2003). “Cried Wolf (and Other
Animals)” salvages itself after the
gloomy intro bursts into wistful
operatic moans. The Rest channels
Aesop in a ‘moral-of-the-story’
way and remind us, “It can happen
to you.”
“Over The Hill” is a nice piano
ballad, but it’s not until “The Close
Western” hits that I am reminded
of why I bothered to listen to
The Rest in the first place. It’s
emotionally epic and all centered
on the refrigerator magnet lyric,
“Can We Make It Tonight?”
“With Every Heartbeat” acts as
somewhat of a bonus track as it is
originally by Robyn and Andreas
Kleerup, shining examples of
Sweden’s ever interesting pop
scene. For the first time we can
hear the same sense of humour in
a song that is displayed in Bently’s
writing. It’s not that The Rest are
less sincere when they play “With
Every Heartbeat,” but if you listen
to the original and picture a couple
of goofy Canadians jamming out
to this song, the wit is there.
-Daniel Wright
NOTABLE TRACKS:
“The Close Western”,
“Over The Hill”
LISTENERS MAY ALSO ENJOY :
Destoyer – Bay Of Pigs
EP, Kleerup – S/T
NEXT SOUND CHECK:
Most anticipated releases
 SPORTS & HEALTH 7
THE ONTARION 161.12

Gryphon runners prepare to take on the world

MIKE TREADGOLD
With the national competition
handled with relative ease, several
members of the Guelph Gryphons
cross-country team will now ply
their trade on the world stage, as
members of the Canadian team in
Sunday’s Federation Internationale
du Sport Universitaire (FISU) world
championships that will be held in
Kingston, ON.
Gryphons lead the way on the
men’s side, led by two-time CIS
cross-country champion Matt
Brunsting, who will be joined by his
Gryphon teammates Allan Brett
and Kyle Boorsma, along with Nigel
Wray, who will serve as the alternate.
The six-member men’s team will
also feature Dave Weston and Kyle
O’Neill from Western, and Kelly
Wiebe from the University of Regina.
On the women’s side, the
Gryphons will also have a
commanding presence, led by CIS
silver medalist Lindsay Carson,
along with her teammate Rachel
Cliff, who recently won a pair CIS
gold medals in track and field. They
will be joined on the five-member
team by two-time CIS cross-country
champion Megan Brown from U of
T, Sherbrooke’s Valerie Belanger and
Jess Pearo from McMaster.
Chris Moulton, one of the
Gryphons coaches, will also be on a
staff led by Western’s Bob Vigars.
“This event is so unique because
of the range of athletes that
participate,” said Moulton, who did
note that in order to participate,
runners must be full-time university
students. “Many of these athletes
have international experience and
can range in age from 18 to 29.”
In fact, all of the Gryphons
participants have international
experience, except for Brunsting,
who has been injured on two
previous occasions, which kept him
from running.
Moulton will be working
predominantly with the Canadian
men’s team in Kingston, helping to
prepare them for Sunday’s 10km
event, while McMaster coach Rory
Sneyd will lend his expertise to the
women’s 5km event.
“We’ll cross over wherever we
need to,” said Moulton. “But, my role
will be very logistical and managerial,
which is great for me, because it fits
with what I do in Guelph.”
Canada has never medaled at the
FISU cross-country championships,
and although Moulton did not want
to tie himself to a prediction, he is
optimistic for both genders.
“This is one of the strongest
[Canadian] teams that we’ve ever
put forward in recent years,” he said.
“The level of CIS cross-country
running keeps getting stronger and
stronger.
“I’m looking at our potential
top three women with Lindsay,
Rachel and Megan and those are
three unbelievable talents who have
competed internationally. We’re
blessed.”
Brunsting voluntarily held
back throughout the indoor
season in preparation for the FISU
championships, and will be looking
to continue his success on the Fort
Henry Hill course, the site of his
CIS title in November.
“This will be a great way for Matt
to finish his university career,” said
Moulton. “He has unbelievable faith
in himself and a big part of his year
was planning for the FISU race.”
Despite their outstanding history
of experience and success running at
the international level, Brunsting
and Carson have also been dogged
by injuries this season. Moulton,
however, quieted any speculation
that two of Canada’s top runners
would be hampered this weekend.
“Lindsay raced 5km in Hamilton
last weekend and finished with a
time of 17:10, which is pretty good.
She’s coming along quite well and
she’s such a tough athlete,” he said.
“She’s fit, healthy and ready to go.
“Matt just does so well in cross-
country. His health is good. His past
two weeks of training have been
great. He’s ready to go.”
Moulton believes that hosting the
event will provide a degree of home
field advantage for the Canadian
team, which has never run FISU
cross-country on Canadian soil.
“This race has never been held
in North America, so hopefully it
provides a boost,” said Moulton, who
also recognized the strengths posed
by teams from Japan, France and
Great Britain. “I really think that Rashaad Bhamjee
we can be in the mix. We’re a deep Fourth-year Gryphon Kyle Boorsma is among the six U of G runners
team.” heading to Kingston for the FISU cross-country championships.

Waterloo’s steroid response sets a good example for other

schools
tarion
On

other universities and possibly high to compete at a high level in a

MIKE TREADGOLD
Late last week, the Ontario
university sports community was
rocked by news that a Waterloo
Warriors football player was
being investigated for possession
of steroids and human growth
hormone, with quantities of
these banned substances deemed
to be used for the purposes of
trafficking.
As a result of the investigation,
Waterloo’s athletic director Bob
Copeland requested that the
Canadian Centre for Ethics in Sport
(CCES) test all members of the
Waterloo football team. Copeland’s
decision has good intentions,
but is also costly, with blood and
urine samples expected to cost
approximately $1,500 per player, for
a 65-member team.
The player, who has yet to be
named publicly, was subsequently
banned from campus while the
investigation continues further.
Police suspect that this finding in
Waterloo could ultimately help
uncover a pipeline of banned
substances transported between
schools as well.
And, with the CCES involved,
drug testing at other universities
has since commenced, including
tests at Guelph, Laurier, McMaster
and Western, fitting in with the
speculation that the Waterloo
finding was merely the tip of the
iceberg.
The CCES has stated that
positive results will be made public,
and it is worth keeping in mind that
they are testing for ALL banned
substances, including recreational
drugs such as marijuana. Names
– aside from the Waterloo player
in question – may not be released,
however, the number of positive
tests will likely be made public in
an attempt to serve as a deterrent to
other athletes.
So, that’s a Coles Notes-esque
version of the news story, but as you
know, this is an editorial column and
my platform to offer opinion and
commentary on local sports issues.
To begin with, I firmly believe
that Waterloo’s full-scale testing
procedure is unequivocally the right
decision, regardless of the costs or
firestorm that may be created. Critics
of the team-wide testing believe
that its costs, which could exceed
upwards of $30,000, are simply too
great for a single team to foot the
bill and set a dangerous precedent,
especially with other universities
dealing with financial difficulties to
begin with.
Will the tests uncover some
damaging information that could
affect the OUA football landscape?
Perhaps. But, the ramifications
would ultimately be of short-term
consequence, and, if executed
properly, the response to this
situation could ultimately lead to the
crackdown on a province-wide issue
that affects the health of thousands
Brian Hoskins
of young athletes.
By now, you likely know that
I have continuously applauded
Canadian university sport for its
purity and relative lack of pro sports
egoism. Understandably, this story
came as a shock to myself, as well as
others. I was not too naïve to think
that steroid use was non-existent on
Canadian campuses, but the notion
of pipeline trafficking is disturbing
and in need of a stern response.
For the most part – sad as it
may be – varsity sports are the last
opportunity for young athletes
game that has been a feature of
the majority of their lives. Only
a select few will go on to play at a
higher level and this experience is
about maximizing enjoyment and
helping to create young adults with
high character, who will leave their
respective campuses and take on
new non-sports related challenges.
With this in mind, and knowing the
highly-documented physical dangers
associated with steroid use, doping
must be continually discouraged,
even if it means undertaking some
unexpected expenses.
In the last 20 years, nearly
6000 athletes have been tested on
Canadian campuses, returning 56
positive results, 45 of which were
football players. This is a very small
percentage of ‘using’ athletes, who,
by and large, seem intelligent and
educated about the dangers of
steroid use, fitting in with my ‘purity’
assertion. To continue this history
of good judgment, these alleged
pipelines and dangerous sources of
distribution must be dealt with swiftly
and sternly. Kudos to Waterloo for
setting such a formidable example
for their Ontario university peers.
One can only hope that similar
assertive action is mirrored on other
campuses, including this one.
 8 SPORTS & HEALTH
Coping with that ‘spare tire’
KATELYN DINGMANN
With beach season right around
the corner, many people are trying
to shape up and get ready to wear
that itsy bitsy teenie weenie bikini,
polka dotted or otherwise.
Weight-loss supplements and
muscle enhancers are typically
advertised as being a great way to
burn calories and replace fat with
muscle mass. But really, how safe
can these magical weight loss
pills be? Recently, two particular
products were recalled from the
market for being unsafe.
West Pharm Therma Lean
Fat Burner Energizer is not only
a mouthful to say, but it is also a
health product that has recently
been found to cause dizziness,
tremors, headaches, and an
irregular heartbeat among users. In
more serious cases, usage has led
to seizures, psychosis, heart attacks
and strokes.
The combination of Ephedrine
and caffeine in the Energizer
supplement is what causes it to be
so dangerous.
“Our health food store does
not permit the sale of products
in which an ephedrine is mixed
with caffeine,” said Paul Ezard an
employee at GNC Live Well
Health Canada has stated
that people with heart conditions,
high blood pressure and diabetes
would be most at risk from using
the product and further advised
the company to stop selling and
advertising an unauthorized
supplement. The company has
Shattered dreams, only for a moment
Returning from a
serious injury, Thorn
puts the pieces of his
career back in place.
JUSTIN DUNK
In a football game, momentum
can change in mere seconds; a
big play or a bone-crunching hit
can change the complexion of a
game in an instant.
Gryphons rookie defensive
lineman Cameron Thorn had his
first season turned upside down
in a matter of seconds.
Oct. 24, 2009, was as day
that Thorn will not soon forget.
The Gryphons were closing
out the regular season against
the McMaster Marauders in
Hamilton, a game in which
the Gryphons would suffer yet
another close loss.
But Thorn would have to
endure much more than the pain
of defeat.
In the third quarter, Thorn
was running down the field
to cover a punt, when all of a
sudden, he was on the ground,
writhing in pain.
“As soon as I fell to the
ground, I knew something was
wrong,” Thorn said about what
he felt when the injury occurred.
“I looked down and saw my foot
almost backwards, and I started
screaming.”
already responded by closing down
its website.
Border officials have also
been notified to stop imports
of the product into the country
and anyone who has used the
product or has any health concerns
regarding the use of the product is
highly advised to consult a medical
professional.
Hydroxycut products are among
other supplements that have been
recalled from the market. All users
of Hydroxycut were warned to stop
using the product immediately
after the death of a 19-year-old
American teenager in 2007. Liver
failure in the teen was reported to be
linked to the use of the Hydroxycut
products.
There were also reports of at
least 23 people using Hydroxycut
who had suffered serious liver injury
and damage, ranging from jaundice
and elevated liver enzymes – an
indicator of potential liver injury
– to liver damage requiring a liver
transplant.
In May 2009, Health Canada
claimed to have received reports
of 17 adverse reactions related to
Hydroxycut. The symptoms from
patients included yellowing of the
skin or whites of the eyes, known
as jaundice, brown urine, nausea,
vomiting, light-coloured stools,
excessive fatigue, weakness, stomach
or abdominal pain, itching and loss
of appetite.
Hydroxycut, similar to West
Pharm Therma Lean Fat Burner
Energizer, is a product in which the
After a season-ending and possibly career-threatening injury,
Gryphons defensive lineman, Cameron Thorn, is back on the field,
better than ever.
Medical staffs from both
teams quickly ran out onto the
field to Thorn’s aid, and were soon
accompanied by an ambulance.
“There was no pain until they
popped my ankle back in. The
medical staff had to put my ankle
back in because it was cutting off
the main artery to my foot,” he
Hydroxycut products are among some of the supplements that have drawn concern in the health community.
pills were not officially authorized
by the federal agency to be sold in
Canada.
Health problems associated
with Hydroxycut included
seizures, cardiovascular disorders,
and rhabdomyolysis, a type of
muscle damage that can lead to
other serious health problems
such as kidney failure. The FDA
claimed that these cases were
reported by patients consuming the
recommended doses listed on the
Hydroxycut bottles.
Ezard disagreed with this claim.
Rashaad Bhamjee
described. “The doctors believe
that my fibula shattered when they
put my ankle back into place.”
The first doctor whom Thorn
met with actually told him that he
would have chronic pain for the
rest of his life and he would never
play football again. Fortunately,
the surgeon felt otherwise, saying
APR. 8 - 14, 2010
“People affected by Hydroxycut
were most likely taking a higher
dose than [what is] recommended
on the bottle,” he said.
After the recall of Hydroxycut
in 2009, the product has been
re-released to the market with a
slight change in the ingredients
and is currently still being sold at
GNC Live Well health food stores.
Other health food stores, however,
including Healthy’s refuse to sell the
product.
“These products don’t cause
rapid weight-loss,” said Dr. Yoni
that he would be able to heal
properly with the probability of
him returning to the football
field.
Thorn suffered a severely
As soon as I fell
to the ground, I
knew something
was wrong. I
looked down
and saw my
foot almost
backwards,
and I started
screaming.
Cameron Thorn
Gryphons defensive lineman
reacting to his injury
dislocated ankle and a shattered
fibula, which required a five-inch
plate and six screws to hold the
bone in place to ensure it healed
properly. After surgery, Thorn had
to endure many hours of painful
physiotherapy in order to give
THEONTARION.CA
Courtesy
Freedhoff of Ottawa’s Bariatric
Medical Institute stated in a CTV
news report. “There is no magic
weight-loss in a bottle...if there
were, we would all be taking it and
we would all be skinny.”
So, before we seek the extremes
in our weight-loss goals for the
summer, we have to be sure to
recognize the risks were taking in
using these ‘magical weight loss
pills.’
After all, having a few rolls is
better than suffering from serious
liver damage, isn’t it?
himself the opportunity to return
to football.
“It was painful,” Thorn said
of the rehabilitation process. “I
went to physiotherapy three days
a week, and I started jogging and
stretching to loosen up all of the
stiff ligaments.”
After more than five months of
physiotherapy and many workouts
in the weight room, Thorn’s leg is
back to full strength.
Thorn has worked all the way
back to health very quickly and
is participating in a full range of
drills this week at the Gryphons
spring practices. His football
career is able to continue after
battling back from such a serious
and horrific injury.
Thorn had a successful rookie
campaign before suffering his
injury. The rookie defensive
lineman dressed in all eight regular
season games for the Gryphons,
seeing time on special teams and
rotating in on the defensive line.
He recorded one solo tackle
and six assisted tackles during
his rookie season and hopes to
improve on those numbers by
gaining an increased role next
season along the defensive front.
Thorn has a clear vision of his
goals now that he is able to step
on the field once again.
I definitely want to start,” he
said. “I am going to try to start
and be the best.”

THE ONTARION 161.12
Female sexual dysfunction: a biological or social problem?
CATHLEEN FINLAY
It’s the seven words that all men
dread: “Not tonight honey, I have a
headache.”
The international phrase for
a woman’s low libido is now in
the middle of an international
controversy.
The four categories of Female
Sexual Dysfunction (FSD) have
been labelled: decreased sexual
drive/libido, female arousal disorder,
female orgasm disorder, and pain
during intercourse.
FSD has been dubbed fact by
some, and invention by others. But
how can a dysfunction, recognized
by medical physicians, be deemed
false?
Leonore Tiefer is a clinical
associate professor of psychiatry at
New York University’s School of
Medicine and the Albert Einstein
College of Medicine. She is also
the founder of the New View
Campaign, which opposes the
recent medicalization of sexuality
that has helped pharmaceutical
companies sell drugs to millions of
Americans every year.
“FSD as a medical disease? No.
It doesn’t exist,” said Dr. Tiefer in a
phone interview from her office in
New York. “There are a lot of lies
and misinformation out there.”
Dr. Tiefer views the recently
defined dysfunction as part of the
newest trend in medicine today.
“[It’s about] disease mongering.
It’s about marketing – the marketing
of attitudes and diseases,” she
said. “The marketing of models of
sexuality are a part of the marketing
of drugs and treatments.”
Disease mongering includes the
widening of the definition of illness
and disease to allow pharmaceutical
companies to profit off the ‘cures’
for new sicknesses. There needs to
be a disease in order to necessitate a
drug to cure it.
Have your steak and eat it too
Exploring the benefits
and risks of red meat
through the eyes of a
former vegetarian
ELIZABETH MCLEOD
The road to eating meat has
been a long and arduous one for
this strict vegetarian-turned-steak-
lover.
However, after the gradual
journey from tofu to fish and from
chicken to steak – one which was
filled with culinary disasters – I
truly feel home. As red meat and
I become increasingly involved, I
thought it would be a good idea to
take a step back and analyze whether
this is a healthy relationship. The
question of whether or not red meat
is a good dietary choice is fervently
debated in the health world, and as
is the case with most hot topics in
health, the answer is far from being
clear-cut.
As is the case with many things
delicious, there are both positive and
negative aspects to your T-bone.
On the bright side, lean red
The masses accept
medicalization, according to Dr.
Tiefer, because it promises fast,
simple, and expert solutions to
sexual difficulties.
“There are a lot of interesting
books to read about sexuality,” said
Dr. Tiefer. “Don’t go to a doctor – go
to a bookstore. I think women have
sexual difficulties, but dysfunction?
No.”
The question of sexual
‘dysfunction’ versus ‘difficulty’ has
not been ignored by physicians who
treat FSD.
“I think the word dysfunction is
terrible. That’s really a misnomer,”
said Dr. James Clark, a physician
who runs the Central Florida
Female Sexual Dysfunction clinic.
“I think the reality, in better words,
is female sexual difficulties or female
sexual problems.”
meats are not only a good source
of protein and energy, but also may
educing heart
hold benefits in reducing
xcellent source
disease. They are an excellent
erals, including
of vitamins and minerals,
phorous, and
iron, zinc, phosphorous,
potassium. From the perspective of
a formerly fatigued vegetarian, the
addition of red meat in moderation
to my diet provided a bounty
of energy.
The key word here ere
is moderation. In thee
case of red meat,
‘too much of a good
thing’ is entirely
possible. Excessive
red meat
consumption can
be directly linked
to obesity, due
to its high fat
content.
Sarah White is a nutrition
and naturopathy student who
has done research examining the
onsumption in
dangers of red meat consumption
high quantities.
“Specifically, many of these
studies link red meat consumption
Courtesy
But Dr. Clark’s discomfort with
the term dysfunction does not mean
that he doesn’t embrace medical
treatment for FSD.
“It’s a very common issue for
young women to have pain with
intercourse,” he said. “There are
medications that can help relieve
painful intercourse, especially for
those that have pain upon insertion,
which is another type of painful
intercourse.
“There are so many different
treatments, depending on which
of the four categories the problem
[is in],” he continued. “Often,
there’s overlap – it’s more than just
one of the four categories. So, the
treatments are as extensive as the
reasons and the diagnoses behind
them.”
One of the most contentious
aspects to the debate on FSD is
to cancer,” said White, who has
specifically focused on differences
between factory farmed and organic
meats. “Factory-farmed animals are
caged and fed grain that is laced
with pesticides,
hormones,antibiotics
and animal products
products. For this
reason, consumers should choose
only organic and antibiotic-free red
meat.”
the validity of the statistics on
American women who suffer from
the dysfunction.
Dr. Clark’s website claims that
43 per cent of women in America
suffer from FSD. When asked
where this statistic came from,
Dr. Clark cited a 1999 study
done by Edward O. Laumann
et al., published in the Journal of
the American Medical Association
( JAMA).
Tiefer scoffed at Clark’s choice
of proof.
“[The study was a] re-analysis
of sociological data from 1994,”
commented Dr. Tiefer on the 1999
study (referred to as the JAMA
paper). “It is completely fraudulent
as health data.
“One of the authors of the
JAMA paper has been quoted as
regretting the widespread publicity
of the study. He had no idea it
would be used in this way,” said Dr.
Tiefer. “The reiteration of that 43
per cent figure signifies a lack of
concern with academic rigour.”
The second study cited by
Dr. Clark is the 2008 PRESIDE
study by Jan Shifren, published in
Obstetrics and Gynaecology which
found that 44 per cent of women
“reported experiencing a sexual
problem of some kind.”
The study also concluded that
of the 44 per cent, only 12 per cent
said that they had problems that
caused them distress.
“[Shifren] went one step
further, and this is kind of
important,” said Dr. Clark. “Of the
44 per cent of women, only about
a quarter of them are disturbed by
the sexual dysfunction. It’s not that
44 per cent have a real bothersome
problem; probably it’s only 10 or
12 per cent.
“[A woman] may not get
orgasms, but if they don’t have
a partner, and they’re staying at
Additionally, portions and cuts
are important variables. It may be a
shock to some, but a proper portion
of red meat is not an Angus with
cheese, or an A1 steakhouse XT, but
instead, a 3oz portion, about the size
of a deck of cards. It is important
to opt for leaner cuts of meat, such
as lean ground beef
or a lean
Robin Ult
boneless
tenderloin.Keep in mind that
one cannot live on red meat alone,
and it is necessary to incorporate red
meat as one part of a balanced meal.
Interestingly, red meat does
not treat everyone the same way.
SPORTS & HEALTH
9
home knitting sweaters, it really
doesn’t matter,” added Dr. Clark.
Another issue that has been
raised is the role of pharmaceutical
funding in research, such as the
PRESIDE study, which was
funded by pharmaceutical company
Boehringer Ingelheim.
Studies (like the 2003 BMJ
paper by Joel Lexchin et al.) have
shown that a bias favours products
that are made by the company
funding the research.
“The problem is in the
real world, if we don’t have
pharmaceutical companies funding
these studies, most studies won’t
get done,” insisted Dr. Clark.
“Because that’s the only place the
money comes from.
“So there won’t be any medical
breakthroughs or any research,
because the National Institute
of Health or any government
organizations don’t have the
money anymore to fund this kind
of research.”
It is statements like this that
has led Dr. Tiefer to believe that
“Sexuality has been hijacked by
pharmaceutical companies.”
Ideas about the ‘normal’ sexual
functioning of women have always
been in flux according to University
of Guelph History professor Linda
Mahood.
“In the Victorian era,
women who showed overt
sexuality were seen as suffering
from female insanity which
could lead to incarceration or
institutionalization,” said Dr.
Mahood.
Is FSD a medical dysfunction?
Does the existence of FSD open
the floodgates for pharmaceutical
companies to create the next Viagra
for women? Or does the invention
of this disease signify new social
ideas surrounding ‘normal’ female
sexuality?
Depending on your blood type, you
may be more or less prone to the
benefits of red meat. Those with
Type O blood can be classified as
meat-eaters. Type O is the oldest
blood type, dating back more than
40,000 years, and requires animal
proteins found in meats for good
health.
Types A, B and AB – the
‘newest’ blood type – have a slightly
more difficult time digesting red
meats and are less reliant on animal
proteins.
There are additional factors that
must be considered when choosing
to eat red meat, including genetics,
body weight and lifestyle choices,
such as level of activity, smoking,
and drinking alcohol. For example,
if you tend to be an inactive, boozing
smoker, perhaps a diet high in red
meat may not ultimately be the best
health choice for you.
If you consider these additional
factors, keep within the parameters
of moderation and make healthy
choices when it comes to your red
meat, you can truly have your steak
and eat it too.
 The Ontarion
So, the Ontarion is talking about sex.
But let’s face it, who isn’t talking about sex. It’s something that we are confronted with every day, in magazines, on television and in a lot of cases, in
bedrooms. With our sex feature, we have profiled a number of different perspectives and approaches to sex. In some cases, the anecdotes are a little
funny, others are more serious, while some are just awkward; but isn’t sex all of these things at one time or another?

goes a little
As we see public discussion about sex becoming less taboo, we are able to explore further into sexual practices that might not have been talked about
in public forum before. This reinforces a dialogue about sex that helps to break down barriers to make people more comfortable and tolerant.
Sex is something that we have all been involved with at some level and is something that goes beyond relationships; it is something that can be indi-
vidual as well. Just take a visit to your local sex shop and see for yourself.

deeper With this feature, the Ontarion is trying to showcase the different and intriguing ways that sex presents itself to the student population. Everyone has
a different and unique way of talking about sex, and below are just a few examples of one of the most important and talked about issues, not only on
campus, but in our culture at large.

•Masturbation•
Women don’t really like sex, do they? Any woman who craves
sex simply must be suffering from hysteria and should be deni-
grated and cured of her affliction lest she poisons society.
Certainly the aforementioned ideas are untrue and views on fe-
male sexuality have come a long way from a time in the past when
they were widely held as reality. Along with the idea that women
were never to enjoy sex, they were also not to engage in mas-
turbation. A woman choosing to pleasure herself was considered
the cause of heart disease, cancer and hysteria and any woman
thought to engage in masturbation was in danger of having her
clitoris removed as punishment. While ideas about female mas-
turbation have come far, it continues to be stigmatized in a way
that male masturbation isn’t. According to the Transformation of
Intimacy by Anthony Giddens, when asked if they have mastur-
bated at any point in their lives, 90 per cent of men admitted to
having done so. Out of all women asked, 40 per cent of women
claimed to have masturbated at some point. While certainly more
women have then the survey expresses, there seems to be this
reluctance to admit to having masturbated as a woman.
In order to conceive of a woman masturbating, many men in-
stantly picture scenes set for a romantic mood complete with a
bubble bath or lit candles. Some ask what shower head was used
in the making of a young lady’s recent orgasm or inquire about
the treasure trove of sex toys she, no doubt, requires in order to
pleasure herself sans partner.
But sometimes all it takes is some pubescent curiosity and
Gregory Smith, the young hero of the movie Small Soldiers.
It was grade five. The year my parents bought me Small Sol-
diers on VHS. The year public school teachers were separat-
ing the boys and girls to have hushed conversations about our
‘changing bodies’ and burgeoning sexual desires. In the pamphlet
each of the girls in my class was provided were instructions for
‘exploring our vaginas,’ just in case we were curious. We were.
We’d heard and vaguely understood all of those Spice Girls lyrics
and we wanted to know what we were missing. All the steps to
the exploration were in it and eagerly memorized to be used later,
•Sex Shopping•
Male masturbation certainly doesn’t have the same level of
mystique and intrigue – or frequency – as its female counterpart.
By nature, men are curious, and at a young age start exploring
what their bodies do, and how they work.
This self-exploration, not to mention the discovery of pornogra-
phy and the realization that they are attracted to other men and/or
women, inevitably leads to masturbation, usually in late pre-teen
or early teenaged years. Thoughts race through their brains: will
I get caught? Do I really like what I’m seeing? What if I try it like
this? Oh, that’s new! But...it happened so fast?!
Renowned sex educator and counsellor Sue Johanson was
very candid in an interview conducted by the Toronto Sun about
her perception of the frequency of male masturbation.
“99 per cent of men of all ages masturbate regularly,” began
Johanson. “And the other one per cent are liars.”
Whether Johanson was being completely frank or slightly face-
tious is debatable, but nevertheless, her comment reinforces the
fact that for many men – particularly at a young age – masturba-
tion fast becomes second nature, especially for those who may
cope with vasocongestion, aka “blue balls.”
Similar studies, such as American sex researcher Alfred Kin-
sey’s 1948 report, Sexual Behavior in the Human Male, have al-
leged that upwards of 90 per cent of men masturbate, with those
numbers declining in marriages and old age.
And so persist the age-old questions: how much is too much?
Should you stop masturbating when you’re in a relationship or
when you get married?
If you’re looking for answers, you’ll be hard pressed (no pun
intended) to find concrete evidence either way, however, the no-
tion of compulsive masturbation is real, wherein the activity is per-
formed not for pleasure or gratification, but to reduce anxiety or
stress. The practice of compulsion, according to The Diagnostic
and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, significantly interferes
with the individual’s normal routine, occupational functioning, or
usual social activities or relationships with others. In short, if mas-
turbation is preventing you from leading a balanced lifestyle, per-
Ed Reiber has seen the same story playy outout
ut over
ove
veer and
and over
•Abstinence•
Abstinence. The only form of birth control that is 100 per cent ef-
again. fective, so they say. However true this adage may be, being a uni-
A group of university-aged males walk into his local sex versity student and choosing to abstain from sex is typically viewed
shop, perusing the displays and making jokes about the prod- as the territory of the staunchly religious and those for whom the
ucts. After a few laughs, but rarely any purchases, the group opportunity for sex never truly arose. Many have expressed the
leaves. But, a few days later, one or two will come back – al- sentiment that these abstainers can’t possibly know what they’re
ways on their own – and make a purchase. The group setting missing or else they would never have made the unconceivable
afforded the comfort of checking out Reiber’s products; the decision to wait. This being said, some, like our born-again virgin,
return trip simply validated their interest. knew exactly what he was missing and is happy to wait anyway.
“It’s a big joke when they come in as a group; they’re laugh-
ing a lot, especially when it’s guys,” said Reiber, the general At first, choosing to abstain from sex was an incredibly difficult
manager of the Love Shop on Woolwich St. in Guelph, and decision. This, due to the fact that I really like sex.
the former manager of a similar store in Waterloo. “They don’t I’d been having sex with committed partners since I was 19. A
want their friends knowing what they’re buying, and the first late bloomer, some might say, I originally wanted to wait (like all
chance they get, they come back alone.” good Catholic boys do) until I had found “the one.”
While Reiber admitted that his clientele in Guelph isn’t After finding who I thought was “the one” at 18, and dating her
made up of as many students as was the case in Waterloo, for about a year, she ended our relationship the day after her se-
where his store was close to the campus, he did acknowledge nior prom. What I felt was inextricably more painful than anything I
the importance of engaging the student sex shopper. had ever felt before. At 19, and incredibly horny, I’d thought for the
“We do a big promotion at the Envy Lounge in downtown last year that I was about to give myself away to someone I cared
Guelph. Every Sunday is the Sex and Blues Trivia,” said about. However, before I was 20, I was lucky enough to find some-
Reiber. “We also offer a 20 per cent discount to students year-round. We recognize that they don’t have a lot of money, but they’re a big part one else whom I did care for ... well, for about an hour.
of our business.” My decision to have sex for the first time resulted from the ‘spur
Reiber listed condoms, lubrication and novelty joke gifts among the most popular items sold to university students, with adult magazines and of the moment’ feeling that most guys get ... and although I’ve slept
vibrators in the next group of the most sought after items. with numerous women since, at 28 years of age now, I still regret
More than anything though, he stressed the importance of developing an expert relationship with customers, offering help when necessary, my first time.
without being intrusive. So, at 26 when I met my current girlfriend, a confident, indepen-
“The more comfortable you make the customer feel, the better their shopping experience will be,” said Reiber. “If you see a customer come in dent woman with high moral fibre, I knew that I may not be having
and they’re nervous, you need to give them the support they need, but be discreet about it. You always want to make a joke out of it and have sex again for a while. It wasn’t until after a few months of being with
fun.” her that I realized “a while” actually meant “not until marriage.” Al-
though it was a difficult thing to accept, I’ve since come to welcome
my present situation, because I know that I’m with an incredible
person whom I love tremendously.
And at the same time, I know that I’ll finally get the chance to
have the sex I’ve always wanted.

•Sex and Emotion•

when the time was right.
And then along came Gregory Smith. I certainly hadn’t been
looking for the object of my first sexual fantasy; I more discovered
it by accident. Through the hour and a half that Gregory fought
artificially intelligent-army-action figure-robots, I swooned.
So that night with both Gregory and the pamphlet in mind, I
explored but not expecting much. Other girlfriends who had gone
before me had reported lack-luster results. The pamphlet was a
dud and sex was going to be a yawn for our entire lives. After
a few moments of careful concentration and fumbling, I made a
discovery.
The girls in class were wrong and it was awesome.
haps it’s time to reconsider.
Until then, go nuts...
After a week of ignoring your partner, you show up with some K-Y warming gel, ready to make it happen. You get rejected. You scratch
your head. You go home alone, and soon realize just how terrible K-Y warming gel really is.
You would think it’s common knowledge for most people that a strong emotional connection between couples outside the bedroom trans-
lates to good sex. Pretty obvious, right?
Not to everyone.
“You will hear from women that what is going on in their head is going to affect them even wanting to have sex,” says Louise Dorfman, a
psychotherapist who has been counseling couples for over nine years with her husband, David Rubinstein. “So, if they have a week or so
of not really emotionally connecting with their partner, and the guy says well come on, let’s go to bed, they say ‘well I’m not really turned on.’
And he gets offended. But nobody is finding out what the other person is feeling.”

•Sex Addiction•
By now, you’re surely aware that when news of Tiger Woods’
infidelities was made public, it was accompanied by his own ad-
mission of being an addict. A sex addict.
Many scoffed at the very idea, viewing the claim as nothing
more than a weak excuse for unforgivable behaviour.
But, according to Penny Lawson, manager of family services
and special programs at Bellwood Health Services in Toronto, sex
addiction is a real and treatable condition.
“Sexual addiction is an addiction like any other,” said Lawson,
one of Canada’s leading experts on the topic. “You could substi-
tute the word ‘sex’ for ‘alcohol.’ It is when a person uses some sort
of sexual behaviour to medicate or prevent uncomfortable emo-
tional states.”
It is important that people don’t attempt to ignore the serious
nature of sexual addiction and affix such a label to themselves to
excuse cheating. Lawson indicated that through a series of tests,
experts can easily differentiate between a high sex drive and an
addiction.
“Very often, we find something sexually inappropriate has hap-
pened prior to adolescence that introduced them to the idea of
masturbation or sexuality early,” she said. “It’s about looking at
the criteria. Has this person’s tolerance increased to the point that
they’re behaving in ways that they thought they never could? Is it
interfering in other aspects of their lives? Are people in their lives
objecting to what they’re doing? Have they tried to stop and not
been able to?”
The advent of technology and the Internet has a clear positive
correlation with the likelihood of one developing a sexual addic-
tion.
“Obviously, pornography and masturbation are a big [factor] and
have been since pornography was on the Internet around 1991,”
said Lawson. “Everybody has a natural tendency to be curious.
“In the old days, to see pornography, you had to have an ex-
change with someone; you had to buy a magazine or a tape. But
today, in the privacy of your own home and your own room, you
can view all kinds of things. This has created problems for peo-
ple.”
In agreement with Dr. David Demonico’s research, Lawson ap-
proximated that five or six per cent of the population has a sexual
addiction, with an additional five or six per cent falling into an ‘at
risk’ category.
She also added that especially in the case of university stu-
dents, sexual addiction can be difficult to diagnose.
“For someone who is new and in university, they probably have
a high sex drive and perhaps for the first time, a lot of freedom,”
she said. “Therefore, it can be hard to assess this group, because
what you’re doing in your first year away from home may not nec-
essarily be addiction.”
Lawson listed websites such as sash.net and iitap.com as re-
sources for people with questions about their own potentially ad-
dictive behaviour.
Dorfman and Rubinstein work on issues such as infidelity, a lack of passion and physical intimacy, communication problems, as well as
issues like arguing and power struggles. Regardless of the problem, both therapists say that building a strong emotional connection with
your partner is the most important thing in overcoming any one these issues.
It’s seems simple. You might be thinking, ‘tell me something new.’ But both Dorfman and Rubinstein say that building this connection re-
quires practice.
One common problem that most couples are familiar with is a discrepancy in sexual desire, where one partner has a higher desire than
the other.
“[What we work on] is not making it a pathology, that there is something wrong with that, but to help them understand what is happening
in each one of them,” said Rubinstein. “In other words, it’s OK for the high-desire partner to want to have sex, but it is also okay for the low-
desire partner to express that they’re not that interested.”
Rubinstein says that one of things to work on is actually listening to each other differently; to engage each other differently.
“I mean, for example, there are many couples who don’t look at each other in the eyes. So, even to have that type of engagement, where
they look at each other and try to see who is there – so to speak – and try to understand what the person is feeling, [what they] are about
and to try and understand the emotional world of each of them.”
Adds Dorfman, “It takes practice, it’s a skill. We’re not talking about staring at each other, but really trying to see who’s there. To learn from
all your senses, to listen deeply when your partner is talking, to put all that busyness out of your own mind so you’re not trying to figure out
what you’re going to say next, or not thinking I need to defend myself because he is really talking about me.”
Both therapists say that learning to develop a strong emotional connection with your partners at a younger age is beneficial to a healthy
relationship down the road. A good sex life will surely be the result.
There’s even more sex in the Ontarion this week! Female sexual dysfunction: a biological or social
Check out the following articles as well: problem? page 9
Sexposure: A final farewell page 13
Pop Cultured: A new kind of addiction page 16
 Life
12 APR. 8 - 14, 2010 THEONTARION.CA

lets them eat brioche

NICOLE ELSASSER
There is nothing quite as
satisfying to a bona fide food
enthusiast as successfully baking
bread. This being said, there are
so many obstacles and potential
snares that can intimidate the
bread-baking neophytes that the
feat may never be attempted at
all. Aside from the obvious mind-
trap of ‘what if my yeast isn’t
active somehow,’ which is usually
accompanied by ‘what happens
if my dough doesn’t rise,’ the fact
that nearly every bread recipe
seems to be written with the
assumption that all home-cooks
own a standing mixer with a dough
hook is certainly daunting. In lieu
of the home-cook’s likely lack of
a standing-mixer, kneading the
dough by hand becomes necessary.
This can be difficult especially
without an understanding of the
role that kneading plays in the
bread baking process and the
overnight or while you are out at
work, or school, which means that
you are not pacing your home and
peeking at the rising dough every
three minutes, praying for a rapidly
doubling in size. And, on top of
all that, by succeeding at baking
your own bread from scratch you
have swiftly become outrageously
impressive to all your non-baker
friends.
This recipe for brioche is a
perfect way to start of baking. The
delicious, slightly sweet bread is
wonderful for breakfast with a
little bit of blackcurrant or apricot
jam. The bread is even good when
stale, and the leftover bread can be
used in many other recipes. It is
very simple to make and requires
minimal kneading.
And Hemmingway liked
brioche. Need I say more?
The recipe provided is inspired
by Ina Garten’s and is enough for
two loaves. It is difficult to divide

C RECIPE for Brioche C

patience and strength to do so for the recipe in two, but one of the Kyle Gillespie
often close to 10 minutes. Then loaves can be frozen for later.
there’s the time consuming nature And in case there are any
of bread baking, often involving brioche enthusiasts reading
several rising times spanning hours this particular article and are Directions bowl and cover with plastic wrap.
or even days, and that damned scratching their heads about the Ingredients Refrigerate the dough overnight to
aforementioned kneading time. appearance of the pictured brioche, Combine the water, yeast and rise.
But there is good news. yes it doesn’t look like brioche. 1/2 cup warm water sugar in a bowl. Stir and allow to After rising time, allow the
With a properly stocked pantry, The Barefoot Contessa said seam 1 package of dry yeast stand for 10 minutes until the dough to sit at room temperature
it can be very inexpensive to make at the top and here we are with a 3 tbsp sugar yeast and sugar dissolve and there for one hour. Grease two loaf pans.
your own bread. Not to mention crater-covered brioche rather than 6 large eggs, at room is a foam on the surface of the Turn the dough onto a lightly
that with many types of bread the shiny smooth crust one would temperature mixture. Add the eggs and beat floured counter and cut it in half.
the rising time can take place normally expect from this beloved 4 1/2 cups unbleached flour them with a hand mixer or whisk Roll each side into a small cylinder.
2 tsp kosher salt for one minute, until well mixed. Place the cylindrical loaves into the
1 cup unsalted butter, at With the mixer on low speed, pans and cover with a damp towel,
room temperature add two cups of flour and salt and allowing them to rise at room
1 egg mixed with 1 tbsp mix for five minutes. Keeping the temperature until they double in
milk, for egg wash mixer on low throughout, add two size, roughly two hours.
more cups of flour and mix for Preheat the oven to 375 degrees
Yields two loaves five more minutes. Add the soft F. When the loaves have risen,
butter in chunks and mix for two brush the top of each with the egg
minutes, scraping down the beater wash and bake for 45 minutes, or
until well blended. Continuing to until the crust is golden and the
mix, add an extra 1/4 cup of flour. loaves sound hollow when tapped.
Knead the dough for two minutes. Turn loaves out onto wire wracks
check it out at Scrape the dough into a buttered to cool.
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THE ONTARION 161.12
Creeper alert: some strategies to surviving a night on the town
SAM MORTON
Let’s see if this situation sounds
familiar to any ladies out there: it
is Thursday night and it has been
a long week. You and some friends
are blasting the music and getting
ready for a night on the town. You
have visions of what your night is
going to be like: a good time with
the girls and a chance to dance all
the stress away. You’re checking to
make sure you have everything: ID,
wallet, cell phone and a survival
guide’s worth of strategies for
avoiding the inevitable ‘creepers.’
Now, first thing is first: we must
define the creeper in order to avoid
the creeper. A solid definition of a
creeper is hard to pin down; just
as our survival strategies progress
so too does the creeper’s offensive
moves. So in place of a definition
here are some signs to look for. The
biggest thing to watch out for is
‘the stare,’ which is the trademark of
many creepy guys. It’s that leering,
calculating look in his eyes that says
‘that’s right baby, come to papa’.
Another sure sign of a creeper is
when a guy finds a random excuse
to get into your bubble such as
massaging your shoulders, picking
lint or hair off your top (which may
or may not have been there in the
first place) or grabbing at your hand
or arm to dance with you. When
subjected to ‘the stare’ and ‘the bad
touch’ it is natural to experience a
sudden urge to vomit. Instead of
Sexposure: A final farewell
It’s been long and
hard (pun intended)
AISLINN WYATT
This is a bittersweet issue of
Sexposure; it’s the last one I’ll be
writing. I’m about to graduate
and be flung into that big, scary
“real world” thing, so I’ll be saying
goodbye to Guelph, the Ontarion
and this column.
In this last issue I wanted to
thank all those wonderful people
who helped me along the way
and reflect on the whole process.
Pardon me this one last indulgence
to cap off a truly indulgent column:
I have been so lucky to be able to
write to you all about my passion,
sexuality, week after week.
My first thanks need to go to
the Ontarion. To be given space
in such a widely distributed
publication to pontificate was an
incredible opportunity. Thanks to
all the staff, volunteers and editors
who turned my simple word
documents into real newspaper
articles.
I would also like to thank all
the members of NAKED at the
Wellness Centre. Without the
camaraderie and support of these
amazing, passionate individuals
this column would not exist.
Thank you for reminding me that
there are sex-positive, motivated
people in this world who want
just as badly as I do to make it a
safer, more pleasurable place to
be. Thanks Wren, Jamie, Rebecca,
spewing on the dance floor, take
a look at some of these survival
strategies.
STRATEGY #1: DO THE WALK-
AWAY
There are many different takes
on ‘The Walk-Away’ but the basis
of this classic creeper survival
strategy is to get away, far, far away
from the creeper. This may involve
pretending to see a friend across the
bar and walking in that direction or
making a dash for the sanctuary of
the washroom.
STRATEGY #2: TELL THEM YOU HAVE
AN STD
I know many women out there
would be too embarrassed to use
this particular strategy, but if you
Sonja, Walker, Jordan, Brittney and
Charlotte! And special thanks to
Natalie, my former co-author, who
helped get this whole thing out of
our heads and off the ground.
The Wellness Centre has been a
great research resource for me this
past semester, and the work they
do on campus is invaluable. You
remember those condoms your RA
had in first year? That’s where they
come from! Shameless plug: please
go visit the Centre, second floor
of the JT Powell building (above
student health services). We’d love
to see you all!
I also need to thank professor
Robin Milhausen for her fantastic
sexuality courses here at U of G.
I was a wide-eyed freshman when
I first had the pleasure of being
her student, and her absolutely
boundless enthusiasm for all
things sexuality has definitely
rubbed off on me. Thanks Robin,
for granting me space within my
education to discuss sexuality
with other interested people, and
for widening the horizons of my
mind.
Another big thanks goes to all of
my friends, family and classmates
who have patiently listened to me
rant indigently about my favourite
sexuality pet peeves. You have all
been gracious enough to listen to
me and bold enough to challenge
me, which has forced me to really
and truly defend my opinions and
examine why I think the way I do.
Yet more thanks to all of those who
sought out my advice on sexuality.
want to see a creeper move faster
than you’ve ever seen someone
move before than this is the move
for you. If you have the ovaries to
use this strategy, you can be almost
guaranteed to have won the battle
in the war on creepers.
STRATEGY #3: I DIG CHICKS
Be forewarned this move can
work, but it also has the possibility
of backfiring... big time! Some
creepers, upon hearing the words
“I’m not into guys” or “I’m a lesbian”
will back off if they believe they
don’t have a chance. However, for
some creepers, using the “I Dig
Chicks” is like adding gasoline to
a horny bonfire. Use with caution
and make sure you have a backup
strategy.
It’s a real honour to be let in on
someone’s sexual self, and I hope
dearly that I have helped.
I’d finally like to thank you
(yes you!) for reading. Nothing
warms the cockles of my heart
the way seeing someone reading
my column does. Better still is
Allen Isard
STRATEGY #4: PUT A RING ON IT
This is the ‘little black dress’
of creeper survival strategies.
Also known as ‘Old Faithful,’ this
strategy entails cracking out a fake
engagement ring and sliding it onto
your ring finger. Usually the sight
of an engagement ring will keep
the creeps at bay. A little skill is
involved as it is imperative that the
creeper sees the ring, so keep your
drink at chest level in your left hand.
Warning: this strategy does not
discriminate between creepers and
non-creepers, meaning the nice guy
you were talking to will also see the
ring. Use with caution.
STRATEGY #5: BE OBSCENE: MAKE
A SCENE
This strategy comes in at the end
Mike Treadgold
to hear people talking about the
issues I discuss every other week.
I’ve harped on at length about how
important communication is when
it comes to sexuality, but simply
talking about sex and sexual health
is the vital first step.
Getting people talking and
LIFE
13
because it is the one many women
are the most afraid of using. This
approach is about being assertive,
standing up for yourself and not
being scared of hurting a creeper’s
feelings. It’s about shedding the fear
of being called a bitch and looking
out for yourself.
Krista Pauly, a University of
Guelph student, is not afraid to stick
up for herself when the creepers
comes out. “Don’t be afraid to tell
them off and get assertive, girls
are associated with being nice and
gentle but when it comes to going
out you are your own body guard
and protect yourself because no one
else is going to,” she says.
So why is it that the most simple
(in theory) and straightforward
strategy for dealing with creepers
is the least utilized? According to
Britney McCullough, a second year
english major at the University of
Guelph, “Men are socialized into
thinking that their aggressive and
sometimes creepy behaviour is okay
and we [women] are socialized into
thinking that we shouldn’t hurt the
man’s ego.”
No matter what their origin
and reason for existence may be, the
fact remains that there are creepers
among us. Next time you are going
out to the bars and checking that
you have everything, make sure
you’re bringing along a repertoire or
creeper survival strategies.
(hopefully) starting a lively,
informed dialogue about sexual
issues was my humble goal in
writing this column. It may not
have changed the world, but I want
to believe that Sexposure has had a
positive influence on the Guelph
community.
Just because this column is
ending doesn’t mean that the
discussions it has fostered have to.
Talk about sex with your friends,
roommates, even parents! While
great strides have been made in
making the world a more sex-
positive place, it’s only when
people are talking about sex freely
that it will be realized that sex isn’t
anything to be ashamed of but
in fact has the potential to be a
beautiful, life-affirming thing.
Thanks for reading, and I’ll see
you on the other side,
 14 LIFE
I really want to get into...
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Trying to get into baseball can
seem intimidating at first; after all,
there are 30 major league teams,
each of which play 162 games each
season, not to mention the many
years of tradition, scouting reports,
and statistics that come with the
sport fondly known as America’s
pastime.
But, if your initial reaction to the
thought of getting into baseball is a
feeling of intimidation and a sense
of being overwhelmed, here are a
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Joe Mauer - Catcher,
Minnesota Twins:
Perhaps the most well-rounded
catcher in recent decades, Mauer was
last season’s American League Most
Valuable Player, demonstrating a keen
batting eye, power and superb defensive
instincts. His trademark sideburns have
become legendary in Minnesota to the
point where the team now dedicates a
game each year to honouring his facial
hair.
t
"3*&4
t
Don’t make drastic changes in your
lifestyle this week, Aries. On Monday
Mercury in Taurus squares impulsive
Mars, your ruler, and you’ll be wise to
a j
think before you take action in a tricky
situation. You’ll feel as if you’re driving
with the emergency brake on as you go
about your daily routine on Wednesday.
Make sure you allow extra time for your
tasks. On Saturday you’ll interact with
an unscrupulous individual. Remember
to stick to your personal standards and
ethics.
t
5"6364
t
You’ll feel like you’re on top of the world
few starter suggestions for how to
get into this great sport.
First, I suggest that you start
by following one team; maybe one
from close to home? Let’s say the
Toronto Blue Jays. Certainly not the
most popular team, they could use
the fans. If you don’t have an affinity
for a particular team, try following a
select few players, or join a fantasy
league and create your own team,
made up of real players.
Not being a hockey fan myself, I
don’t like basing my sense of national
identity around the performance
Albert Pujols - First base,
St. Louis Cardinals:
Undoubtedly, baseball’s most dangerous
hitter, Pujols is coming off of his third
National League MVP season, a year in
which he led the league in home runs,
runs scored and slugging percentage.
Pujols makes hitting look easy and has
already taken aim at the game’s most
illustrious batting records.
this week! On Monday the Moon trines
Venus, your ruler, in Taurus, and your
sense of personal well-being will be
b
strong. Your intuition will be on target
when the Moon sextiles Mercury in
Taurus on Saturday. You’ll devote a lot
of thought to the best way to present
yourself to others. On Sunday you’ll find
a new friend and discover a compatible
companion. It’s a great time to meet new
people.
t
(&.*/*
t
Where are you going, Gemini? Do you
know? On Tuesday your brain will settle
down when Mercury, your ruler, in steady
Taurus trines profound Pluto. You’ll
of a sports team, but the simple
act of following the Blue Jays can
be considered a nation-building
experience. Seeing as the Blue Jays
are the only Canadian team in Major
League Baseball, they attract fans
from all across our diverse nation.
You see, baseball is not necessarily
a game just for traditional “sports
fans.” Baseball does not sustain
the same popularity and culture in
Canada as does hockey.This is largely
because baseball attracts a variety
of fans, for many different reasons.
It’s not as fast-paced or physical as
most other sports, namely hockey or
football. Baseball is foremost a game
of patience, and requires patience to
watch.
Playing video games is a great
way to get to know the teams and
players. Watching games with
Jason Heyward - Outfield,
Atlanta Braves:
Want to make a good first impression?
How about hitting a home run in your
first major league at-bat, as Heyward
did on Monday. Heyward is among the
most hyped prospects to come into the
league in years and became famous for
breaking car windows with his moonshot
home runs in spring training. Rental car
companies now offer – no joke – HLI
(Heyward Liability Insurance).
t
)ĠģĠĤĔĠġĖĤ
t
chart your progress to make sure you’re
on the right path. A domestic matter you
thought was put to rest will pop up again
c
on Wednesday. It’s possible you’ll need
to embark on an extensive home-repair
project. On Sunday you may be asked to
volunteer for a committee dedicated to
helping your community.
g
t
$"/$&3
t
Keep your wits about you as you interact
d
with others this week. Don’t rise to the
bait when the Moon in your sector of
adversaries squares the Sun in volatile
Aries on Tuesday. Your imagination
will be more grounded on Wednesday,
and your brain will start to operate in a
pragmatic way. Try not to rock the boat
in a certain situation on Saturday. Your
best bet is to be as agreeable as possible
in this matter.
t
-&0
t
You have a loud roar, Leo, and this
week an associate will discover how
strident you can be when you’re angry.
e
On Monday Mercury squares Mars in
fiery Leo and you’ll engage in a war of
words with this person. You’ll return
to your home to take care of family
issues on Saturday. Allow time to sort
out your domestic matters. On Sunday
your attention turns to mystical subjects.
You’ll read a book that will help you
develop spiritual insight.
t
7*3(0
t
Virgo, your innate shrewdness will
kick in this week. That’s a good thing,
because on Tuesday a difficult life choice
f
will confront you when Mercury, your
ruler, trines discerning Pluto. You will
make sure you select the right option.
Cabin fever will hit you on Saturday.
You often long for a change of scenery,
since you’re of the Mutable Quality.
APR. 8 - 14, 2010
someone who has a strong grasp of
the rules is a good idea, as a lot of
the excitement comes from taking
notice of the finer details of the
game. Baseball is game of strategy,
odds, and statistics; every situation
calls for a different plan of action.
Just picture yourself as a batter,
standing at the plate, waiting for
the pitcher to throw you something
in the strike zone. He could throw
you a heater down the pipe, or an
unlimited number of permutations
of other types of pitches, locations,
and speeds. Then, consider that
batting is only one aspect of the very
complicated game.
The most important piece of
advice that I can offer to someone
getting into baseball is most likely
the most obvious: go to a game!
Seeing it for yourself is the only way
Roy Halladay - Starting pitcher,
Philadelphia Phillies:
Blue Jays fans went into mourning when
their beloved ace was traded to The City
of Brotherly Love in the off-season after
Toronto determined that they could no
longer afford his game-changing talent.
Doc, as he is affectionately known, has
a robotic-esque work ethic and instantly
makes the Phillies the favourites to
win the NL East. If you’re not a fan of
lengthy ball games, go watch Doc pitch;
he’ll go about his business and get you
home in time to watch The Office.
Consider planning a weekend excursion.
On Sunday a new hobby will cure your
feeling of boredom and stagnation.
t
-*#3"
t
You normally navigate the social scene
with ease, but on Thursday you’ll be at a
loss when you interact with others. The
Moon squares Venus, your ruler, and you
won’t be on the same wavelength as your
associates. You might become entangled
in a mildly embarrassing social faux
pas. Don’t worry. You’ll be back on top
of your social game by the weekend.
On Sunday you may decide to obtain
a friend of the four-legged variety and
become a pet owner.
t
4$031*0
t
You approach life intensely, Scorpio.
On Monday Mercury in your sector of
open enemies squares aggressive Mars
h
and you’ll come up against someone
who isn’t on your side, to say the least.
Before you aim your stinger, consider
if your energy would be better spent
creating a new lifestyle for yourself. You
may become a mentor to a young person
on Saturday. Remember that you have a
lot to give to others, and they can benefit
from your experience.
t
4"(*55"3*64
t
Sagittarius, you are usually too busy
l
to think! However, this week you will
become much more reflective, starting
when profound Pluto, the ruler of your
i
zone of subconscious thoughts and
feelings, turns retrograde on Tuesday.
A new responsibility will be added to
your to-do list on Wednesday. Finding
time for your task will prove a bit of a
challenge. You’ll enter domestic mode
on Sunday. You may spend time in
your kitchen and prepare some of your
favorite comfort foods.
THEONTARION.CA
to get a feel for the atmosphere of
the sport.
Also, try rooting against the New
York Yankees, the most widely-liked
team with a wickedly loyal fan-base,
and disgustingly large number of
players making ridiculous sums of
money. Considered a dynasty of
hitting and pitching power and an
archrival of the Toronto Blue Jays,
the Yankees provide the ideal enemy
for loyal Jays fans.
Like any sport, baseball is a
game of inches. You can miss hitting
or catching a ball by inches; just a
few inches can be the difference
between being safe or out, hitting a
home run or bouncing a ball off the
wall, winning Game 7 of the World
Series or losing it all.
Hopefully I’ll see you at the Home
Opener on Monday! Go Jays Go!
Adam Lind - Designated hitter/
Outfield, Toronto Blue Jays:
Lind is quickly making Blue Jays fans
forget about the last great lefthanded
hitting Jay: Carlos Delgado. The sweet-
swinging slugger, entering just his
second major league season, was the
Silver Slugger award winner last year
among designated hitters and started off
the year with a bang, going long against
the Texas Rangers on Monday. Lind
brings all the talent, and none of the ego
to the game and is a refreshing example
of humble, yet successful players.
t
$"13*$03/
t
You’ll deal with frustrating moments
this week, and your customary stoicism
will be severely tried before the week
is over! You’ll encounter a number of
setbacks in your agenda when Saturn,
your ruler, backtracks into frenetic Virgo
on Wednesday. As you run into delays,
you will become flustered, so keep that
in mind. On Saturday you’ll cut short
your interaction with a loved one who
grows extremely overbearing when
you’re around. Your own needs will take
precedence on Sunday.
t
"26"3*64
t
Trust your instincts this week and you’ll
be glad you did, Aquarius! You often
forget to listen to that inner voice. On
Tuesday make sure you look beneath the
k
surface when you interact with others.
Don’t ignore warning signals. Your sense
of positive optimism will be strong when
the Moon conjuncts lyrical Neptune
in Aquarius on Friday. You’ll find that
your inspiration skyrockets. You’ll revel
in your unconventional attitude this
weekend and concoct a new image for
yourself on Sunday.
t
1*4$&4
t
You are usually laid-back in your
approach to life, Pisces. This week you’ll
surprise yourself with your desire to go
after what you want with gusto! On
Monday you’ll bring a bold attitude
to your life experience. You won’t
back down when you run up against
challenges. Your self-esteem will rise
on Saturday, and you’ll like what you
see when you look in the mirror as the
Moon in Pisces sextiles Venus. You’ll
have the confidence to strut your stuff.
Horoscopes courtesy of
horoscope.com

THE ONTARION 161.12
ANDEW T KNOWS SOMETHING ABOUT DINOSAURS
I’m going to be a podcaster
ANDREW T
Good Morning Angels,
We should start a podcast.
Yeah, seriously: You and me
should get together some time to
record one. It’s not hard, really. All
we gotta do is lay down some audio
tracks, pick a couple of songs to
spice it up, and then share it with
the world. We can make it Sumo-
themed, if that’ll make it easier. You
and I can pretend we’re warring
sumo wrestlers, and we can call the
podcast Dohyo; that’s what they
call the ring they fight in. Look, I’ve
done all the heavy lifting. All you
have to do is show up.
I’m starting to turn pretty heavily
into podcasting…a podcaster? It
may come as a shock to some of
you that I’ve been hosting a radio
program called Andrew T and the
Dynamo Elite for just about three
years now. It may come as more of
a shock that after three years, this
show will no longer be gracing the
airwaves of Guelph’s own CFRU
93.3fm. I’ll be done. Kaput. Finito.
Ended. Finished. Terminated. Over.
Stopped. Other words that mean all
of that.
To break it down, that’s just
about 156 episodes and probably a
little over 300 hours of radio. And
now it’s suddenly going to be gone.
So like a gorilla mother who adopts
a gorilla shaped doll after a terrible
OPEN CONTENT
Deconstructing the iPad hype
MICHAEL RIDLEY
The feeding frenzy over Apple’s
new iPad has become almost
unbearable. While it won’t be
available in Canada until later this
month, it hit the streets in the U.S.
this week and the media is saturated
with chatter about it.
The reviews have been mostly
positive. And surprisingly positive
from some of the usually jaded tech
writers. However, this isn’t really a
review. I have never used an iPad.
Like you, I’ve just read about it and
watched the videos. But there is
something about it that intrigues
me.
First, true confessions: I am a
bit of an Apple fanboy. And I am
seriously distracted by bright, shiny
objects. I am very excited about
the iPad. However, that’s not what
I want to talk about. This isn’t a
review about the iPad; it’s a review
about what the iPad means.
The extraordinary hype around
the iPad started long before we
knew anything about it. We wanted
it to be something to change our
world, our lives. So what’s that all
about? What needed changing so
badly?
Whether the luddites like it
or not, advanced and emerging
technologies tend to make things
better. PC. Internet. iPod. The
wheel. Fire. For some, the iPad will
poaching incident where she loses
her baby, I am going to take up
podcasting to fill the radio-less gap.
To do this, I’m going to be using
Garage Band. On the one hand, it’s
If I can take
my laptop
there and
record some
audio, then
that’s where
a podcast can
happen.
the free software that came with
my laptop, and I’m getting pretty
familiar with it. On the other hand, if
I started a band, it’d be a garage band.
Actually, it’d be a no-fi surf rock/60’s
girl group inspired type of thing,
but they don’t make software about
that. There’s other free software,
like the ever-popular Audacity, but
I’m sticking with Garage Band. Yes
sir, it’s the platform of choice for
determine their future: wild success
or serious crash and burn.
Think newspapers. Print
newspapers are gasping for air
everywhere. Readership has tanked
and the free versions on the web
(while popular) are not bringing in
the revenue. Are newspapers dead?
Definitely. Well, sort of. Maybe.
No.
The publishing industry is
hoping that the iPad will monetize
digital newspapers (and magazines,
and books) in the same way that
iTunes and the iPod did for music.
The popularity of the Kindle,
despite its limitations, suggests
they are on to something. So
the iPad is really the payPad for
publishers. Their future existence is
tied very tightly to its success. This
is probably a good thing. I’m by no
means a fan of Rupert Murdoch
and the mega publishing empires,
but we do need a means to fairly
compensate writers, editors, and
other creators.
What is the iPad? A laptop,
a netbook, or just 4 iPod Touch
duct taped together? Hence the
chatter about this device as a “new
category.” Neither fish nor fowl;
something we will buy in addition
to other devices. For the marketing
types, introducing a “new category”
makes their hearts beat faster. For
us? Meh.
OPINION
recording any and all audio projects
that I do.
The great thing about podcasts
is that they can happen on your
schedule. Kind of like how you can
order pizza at almost any time in
some cities (right?) I can wake up
at 4am and record some Sleepy-
Time audio. Or, it could be the ‘Join
Andrew at the Beach’ edition of the
However, there is something
just plain different about it that
makes you think we are going into
new territory. Doug Horne, one
of the UG librarians, noted in his
blog recently that the iPad was
p
likely the first computer his mother
would buy. Itt will happily sit in her
kitchen and get used all the time.
It may be thee first real “information
appliance.” Oven. Toaster.
Fridge. iPad.
It’s also an appliance
in the sensee that this is
a device to encourage
consumption, n, not a tool
to further creation. The
face and the
touch interface
lack of otherr stuff makes
ndable to the
it more amendable
perience. Too
consumer experience.
uture versions
bad. Maybe future
cements will
and enhancements
change that. t. For now,
getting an iPad means
ing, listening
viewing, reading,
… not so much uch creating
ting.
and contributing.
ager attempt
In a meager
ention away
to deflect attention
from Apple, e, Microsoft
ures of its
leaked pictures
Courier deviceice recently. This is a
dual screen computer that folds
together into a paperback book
sized object. Quite fascinating.
Already it’s being dubbed the “iPad
Courtesy
show. If I can take my laptop there
and record some audio, then that’s
where a podcast can happen.
Some might argue that
something special is missing from
podcasting that you can get on the
radio. Like, one of the things that
everybody loves about SNL is the
feeling that anything can happen at
any moment. It’s live, and anything
killer.” Perhaps. Bring it on. We
need diversity in marketplace as
much as we need standards around
the digital objects we use.
The hype meter is on extreme
at the moment. This too will pass.
We are always y so eager
g to see in
new tools some sort of salvation or
redemption from our
current condition. The device will
set us free. And sometimes it has.
In the case of the iPad, it’s carrying
the hopes and dreams of many of
the digitally challenged industries.
15
can go wrong! That’s kind of what
it’s like being on the radio. With
podcasting, however, nothing can go
wrong and everything can go right.
You have as many tries as you want to
make the perfect bit of radio-styled
entertainment. This American Life
and Radiolab are highly produced
and some of the most perfect bits
of audio I’ve ever listened to. You
Look Nice Today improvise most
of their jokes, but they can cut out
the fat. Even something like Stuff
You Should Know, which is mostly
just reading lots of facts, can be re-
jigged to make the lesson funnier or
more engaging. Not to say that these
possibilities aren’t available on live
radio, but there’s really no excuse for
it to not happen in a podcast. You
have a chance to do it right. Just like
Zac Effron in 17 Again. Did you
see that movie? What’s wrong with
you? I would never watch that!
What I’m asking you to do here
is come over to my house, or Skype
in with me, and let’s record some
podcasts. Oh, and if you want, listen
to Andrew T and the Dynamo Elite
on May 4th, 2010, from 10pm-
12am for the last little bit of a
dynasty. It’s bittersweet, like a bowl
full of rhubarb and sugar. Bam! My
analogies are on fire today!
I actually eat rhubarb and sugar.
My girlfriend makes fun of me for
it. Is that mean, or am I actually
weird?
It’s a bridge to the future for them.
And it has arrived just in time.
And, yes, I’m going to pre-order
one for myself online. Can’t wait.
Michael Ridley is the Chief
f
Information Officer (CIO) and Chief
Librarian at the University of Guelph.
Contact him
h at mridley@uoguelph.ca
or www.uoguelph.ca/cio.
www.u
Teach English
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TESOL/TESL Teacher Training
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 16 Opinion Apr. 8 - 14, 2010 theontarion.ca

L oose Cannon Pop Cultured

Student spaces feeling the squeeze A new kind of

Greg Beneteau
As one of the oldest continuing
publications on campus, the Peak
has long been a place for students
and community members to tell
their stories using a variety of
creative means: news stories, poetry,
photography, visual art, long-form
interviews, first person accounts and
historical retrospectives.
With a focus on social
justice, the Peak has skirted with
controversy and encouraged debate
about everything from gender
norms to the inequalities created
by capitalism. Undoubtedly, it fills
a niche in the campus community
that other publications – including
the Ontarion and thecannon – do
not.
So why is the Peak any less
deserving of its office than the
newly-created Student Help and
Advocacy Centre?
Questions like these will occupy
the CSA Board of Directors at its
Wednesday meeting (now passed)
as they tried to figure out how to
cram one more organization into
the sardine can that we call “student
space.”
The outcome of the space debate
– which may also affect the Photo
Arts Club, if the Peak is given the
front end of the PAC office as
compensation – is not yet known.
But the issue is larger than which
group is more entitled to a door and
four walls.
Although student organizations
continue to grow on this campus,
the university has provided no more
room to accommodate them. In fact,
it can be argued that student space
on campus is being systematically
destroyed by neglect.
The townhouse that holds the
CSA Foodbank and Bike Centre
at the corner of Gordon Street
and South Ring Road is a prime
example. In its fifty-plus year history,
the building has suffered from a
sagging foundation, warped floors,
water damage and mold problems.
For years, tenants have asked the
administration to provide more
Although student organizations continue to grow, there is little room
to accommodate them.
than piecemeal fixes to the seriously
compromised construction.
Instead, the university is planning
to demolish all six of the white
houses on the corner and replace
them with landscaping.
In the meantime, the Foodbank
is being accommodated in a building
across the street, but the Bike Centre
will be closed until the CSA can find
it a new home.
Raithby House was once home
to Student Volunteer Connections,
the Student Support Network and
the Multi-faith Resource Team.
Two years ago, a triple threat of fire,
flooding and destructive squirrel
activity sent its former residents
across the street to McNally House,
where they waited for repairs.
These groups play an important
role in campus life; they deserve
better than to be stuck on the far
end of campus. Yet the historical
home of college professor and
farmer George Raithby, built in
1882, remains uninhabited.
The University Centre itself was
originally financed with student
money, for use as a student space.
Not just the second floor, mind you,
but the majority of the building, was
supposed to belong to students.
But the predecessor to the CSA
was bankrupted by the university,
which refused to collect student
Rashaad Bhamjee
fees. The University Centre was
then “appropriated” by the U of G
in the 1970s. The CSA fought back
and was rewarded with ownership
of the second floor, which could be
considered a consolation prize of
sorts.
That legal battle happened a
generation ago, but the fight for
student space is far from over. The
soon-to-be empty space at Gordon
and South Ring is prime real estate.
If the university decides to rebuild
there, there is no guarantee that
it will include student space in its
plans.
Like death by a thousand cuts,
we are being squeezed into smaller
and smaller locations. To keep
from losing any more ground, the
CSA should adopt a give-and-
take strategy for student space. For
every square inch taken away by the
university, our student representative
must demand an equivalent amount
of space somewhere else.
The CSA should also continue
to push for the university to expand
student space for clubs (there are
more than 80) as well as places of
worship and social hangouts.
Students are suffering from a
serious space deficit. Rather than
fighting over the little room there is
left, we need to turn our attention to
the bigger picture.
addiction
Duncan Day-Myron
I’m beginning to long for the
days when exhaustion was the only
bullshit psychological condition
Hollywood also-rans used as a
scapegoat. What a world we live
in where the defacto response for
an unfaithful celebrity is to go to
rehab.
Back in the ‘90s, Michael
Douglas became probably the
first celebrity to check himself
in for sexual addiction. But the
most publicized case in recent
memory was David Duchovny—a
bizarre case of life imitating art,
as Duchovny plays a sex addict on
Californication— who checked
himself in back in 2008. It came a
little out of left-field then, as the
reports of Duchovny’s (alleged)
philandering didn’t come out until
well after he’d gone into rehab.
Then Tiger Woods happened.
One of the most successful and
highly paid athletes in the world,
his public image went into a
tailspin beginning last (American)
Thanksgiving, with woman
after woman coming out of the
woodwork in the following months.
His wife moved out, he apologized
publicly, and then checked himself
into rehab for “sexual addiction.”
When did this become an
acceptable cover?
I’m not here to dispute whether
sexual addiction actually exists—a
quick Google search will lead you
to enough sexologists who are
doing that far better than I ever
could—just whether or not it is an
acceptable copout. But just the fact
that Sex Rehab with Dr. Drew is an
actual show and not a fever dream
should be enough to indicate that
sexual addiction is far too trendy.
Jesse James followed the
same pattern as Tiger, almost
to a T. Against my wishes, the
(alleged) neo-Nazi and motorcycle
enthusiast married Sandra
Bullock back in 2005. Having
America’s Sweetheart at home
apparently wasn’t enough and
James ended up nailing a woman
with accommodating morals and
a forehead tattoo (and a swastika
on her thigh!) within five years
of marriage. Then came the other
mistresses, and the gutless public
apologia that ended with claims of
‘sexual addiction’ and ended with a
stint in rehab.
When Lindsay Lohan was
(allegedly) living off of blow, Adderall
and Ketel One, during her formative
years, going to rehab for “exhaustion”
was laughable, but it didn’t attempt
to excuse her misdeeds. It just
repackaged it in a way that wasn’t
illegal. Sexual addiction is different,
and worse, because that’s what it
does: it feels as if these lotharios
are trying to absolve themselves
of responsibility, and blame a
psychological disorder which may
or may not even exist. And even if it
does exist, is a rich successful athlete
going around having relations
with porn stars really indicative of
uncontrollable sexual desire? If it
was really that compulsive, I think
more than none of these women
would be beautiful. Or at least have
one that’s off-type. But they’re all
beautiful, young, blonde women. If
there are legitimate people out there
struggling with this, this kind of high
profile would do nothing to create
sympathy for them. If anything,
Woods and James’s behaviour would
trivialize what might otherwise
require serious concern.
Instead of going to sex rehab,
which I imagine is an approximate
mix of resort spa and high school
health class, I think the public
reparations for these men should be
being forced to admit the truth: that
they couldn’t control their throbbing
members and didn’t care enough
about their wives or families to be
faithful. That’s it. No ‘it isn’t my fault,
I have a problem,’ Charlie Sheen
excuses. This non-news would
disappear ten times faster if that
were the case.

Visit www.sundaycinema.ca for more info on these Central Student Association events
all day 8:00 pm 9:30 pm 7:30 doors
doors 8:00 pm show
csa book fair an eveninG witH muSic By
Books for
everyone:
cookbooks, Bruce PeninSula
coffee table
S
ERB
ACK books, health flowerS of Hell
PAP
books,
how-to
books, craft
& gardening Katie StelmaniS
99¢ - $6.99 books, kids
books & much
much more! full five-day feStival includeS: live BandS,
A great time to stock up! Zine fair, art GallerieS, BiKe-in film ScreeninG
courtyard sale sunday cinema Sun Apr 11 live music Thurs Apr 15 live Fri Apr 23
Thurs Apr 8 & Fri Apr 9 war memorial hall e-bar | 41 Quebec | $10 | $8 with food item dubin street united church | 68 Suffolk West | $15 regular | $13 students
uc courtyard $3 UoG stu | $5 general Lic/all ages. Tickets at CSA and The Bookshelf. Co-presented with Kaleidoscope Promotions and Kazoo! For more information, visit www.kazookazoo.com.
Thurs 8 am to 11 pm | Fri 8 am to 5 pm Nelson Mandela and the game that made a nation. Co-presented with KYEO. Tickets at CSA and Ground Floor Music (13 Quebec Street).
The Ontarion 161.12
The Ontarion wants you to vote ‘No’
The Canadian Federation of
Students (CFS) did everything
to stop this referendum from
happening. Months ago, they
refused to accept the petitions
asking for the opportunity to let
U of G students decide whether
they truly want to be members
of the CFS. It took a court
battle and the ruling of a judge
to allow students the right to
democratically decide where their
money goes and whether they
want to be a part of this particular
lobbying organization. Now that
the CFS has been ordered by a
judge to allow this referendum to
go forward, they have descended
upon our school in droves to
inform us of the value of a ‘united
student movement.’
But where were they before?
Many students are hearing
about the CFS and the money
Letters to the Editor
Retraction
On April 1 the Ontarion
published an article entitled “No
Rules, No Problem.” Shortly
after the publication of the article,
the Canadian Federation of
Students (CFS) contacted the
editorial staff of the Ontarion and
the CFS advised that the article
contained factual inaccuracies
and a number of assertions based
on those inaccuracies. Based
on the advice of the CFS, we
immediately removed the article
from the online version of the
Ontarion. We regret any harm
that may have been suffered
by the CFS, the Canadian
Federation of Students-Ontario,
and any other individual.
Dear UofG Undergraduate Students,
On Wednesday, March 31,
2010, the Board of Directors of the
Central Student Association, which
represents all undergraduate students
at the University of Guelph, voted to
take an official stance, to support the
NO campaign in the referendum
regarding continued membership in
the Canadian Fedeation of Students
and in encouraging undergraduate
students to vote to de-federate from
CFS and CFS-O.
As elected and appointed
student leaders on this campus, and
representatives of various groups,
departments and clubs, we support
the CSA in their decision and
encourage all undergraduate students
to vote No during the referendum
voting period from April 7-9.
We, the undersigned, encourage
all undergraduate students at the
University of Guelph to vote NO
in the referendum on continued
membership in the CFS and
CFS-O.
Signed:
Every College Student Government
President:
1. Zach Dadson (College of Arts-
Student Union, CSA Board COA
Appointed)
2. Tammy Fisher (Student
Federation-Ontario Agricultural
College)
they’ve been paying to them for
the first time during this campaign
period. Last issue, the Ontarion
published the results of a CSA
Capacity Analysis and Planning
survey that revealed that in nearly
all areas involving the services
offered to them by the CFS, they
were either totally unaware of
these services or had never used
them at all.
Now that the CFS is looking
at loosing the $224, 000 that U
of G students provide them with
annually, they’re here and with
some unusual tactics to boot. For
some reason, the ‘Yes’ campaigners
and the CFS felt it would be a good
idea to bring in canvassers from
outside universities like York, U` of
T and Ryerson, among others, to
go to classrooms, and walk around
campus talking to students about
all of the good that the CFS does
3. Martin Straathof (College of Social
& Applied Human Sciences Student
Alliance)
4. Kristin Butler (Central Veterinary
Student Association)
5. Graeme Close (College of
Management and Economics Student
Association)
6. Guillaume Blais (College of
Biological Science Student Council,
CSA Board)
7. Adam Kristoferson (College of
Physical & Engineering Science
Student Council)
Student Senators:
8. Nathan Lachowsky (CSA Academic
& University Affairs Commissioner)
9. Kevin Bowman (CSA Academics
& University Affairs Commissioner-
Elect)
10. Allison Webb (Student Senate
Caucus Co-chair, B.Sc. Student
Senator)
11. Thomas Piggott (B.Sc. Student
Senator, President of UoG Pre-Med
Club)
12. Erin Preiss (B.Sc. Student
Senator, Peer Helper)
13. Kaitlyn Townsley (B.Sc. Student
Senator-Elect)
14. Jordan Evans (B.Comm. Student
Senator)
15. John Sakaluk (B.A. Student
Senator, CSA Board Student Senate
Caucus Rep)
16. Alisha Fernandez (BAS Student
Senator-Elect, DukeofEd President,
BASSA Rep)
17. Derek Alton (BA Student
Senator-Elect)
18. Josh Gaber (BComp Student
Senator)
19. Kyle Runeckles (BSc Student
Senator)
And Other Student Leaders:
20. Nick Stepanov (CSA Human
Resources & Operations Comm.-
Elect, GCC VP)
21. Gagan Dhaliwal (CSA Board
CBS At-Large Elected, CBSSC VP-
Internal)
22. Eric Oosterhof (CSA Board OAC
Appointed)
23. Robin Callaghan (CSA Board
OAC At-Large Elected)
24. Leslie Kumagai (CSA Board
and should be allowed to continue
to do for U of G students. But this,
to the Ontarion, speaks to a larger
problem.
Why do they need to bring
students from outside universities
to influence Guelph students
in a Guelph referendum about
Guelph issues? The answer seems
to be because there isn’t enough
of a CFS-supporting presence on
campus to hold up the weight of
a campaign; there weren’t enough
students who openly cared enough
to push for the ‘Yes’ side of the
debate.
According to Denise Martins,
a ‘Yes’ campaigner and incoming
CSA executive, in an article
published in the news section of
this issue, the negative ideas about
these outside-university canvassers
are likely being disseminated by
those campaigning on the ‘No’
OAC At-Large Elected)
25. Adam Little (CSA Board OVC
At-Large Elected)
26. Lisa Parker (CSA Board CSAHS
Appointed, CSAHS-SA VP-Admin-
Elect)
27. Lindsay Morris (CSA Board
CSAHS Appointed)
28. Johnathan McGillivray (CSA
Board CSAHS At-Large Elected)
29. Karen Larkin (CSA Board CME
At-Large Elected)
30. Lyndsey Smith (CSA Board COA
At-Large Elected)
31. Mythri Viswanathan (CBS
Student Council Student Governor)
32. Leona Morris (ADFW
President)
I came out of the recent CSA
elections feeling inspired and with
renewed faith in my fellow students.
Not only had I just been elected
the students’ External Affairs
Commissioner, but I was elected
on a platform of student unity and
cross-campus solidarity. Having
received overwhelming support
from students in this campus I
was ready to defend these ideals
on behalf of all students (both
Guelph and otherwise). I entered
this referendum confident and
empowered.
Here we are now, in the middle
of a referendum that is asking us
whether we are stronger when
connected to students across
Canada. The Canadian Federation
of Students just like any other
organization has its imperfections,
however without membership in a
national student organization, our
students will be left isolated from
the broader student movement. This
situation will not only undermine
our position, but also the position
of all students in Canada. It is vital
for student unions to be in active
communication and work with one
another. The CFS allows for this
communication to take place, and
connects us to a strong movement
which is fighting for students across
the country. I see no proposed
solution to the disorganization and
impotence that we will face should
Editor's Page
17
The Ontarion Inc.
University Centre
side and that they aren’t coming Room 264
organically from students. But it’s University of Guelph
hard to ignore that there’s some N1G 2W1
truth to the assertions likening
these outside canvassers to ontarion@uoguelph.ca
interlopers.
Let’s call a spade a spade here. Phone:
What this comes down to is the 519-824-4120
University of Guelph. Guelph General: x58265
students paying Guelph money Editorial: x58250
for services and advocacy from an Advertising: x58267
organization that most students Accounts: x53534
aren’t even aware of.
It’s hard not to believe that Fax:
there could be a better alternative 519-824-7838
to the CFS. One that is present on
the campus all the year round; not Editorial staff
just when they’re faced with losing Editor-in-chief
our money. It’s time we had a look Daniel Bitonti
Arts & culture editor
at what those might be.
Zack MacRae
And that’s why the Ontarion News editor
wants you to vote a resounding Nicole Elsasser
‘No.’ Sports & health editor
Mike Treadgold
Copy editor
Roli Wilhelm
Web editor
we cease to be members of the CFS. Sarawanan Ravindran
In last week’s Ontarion, the
opposing sides were presented with Production staff
Photo & graphics editor
a disclaimer reminding you that Rashaad Bhamjee
both the ‘Yes’ campaigners and the
Ad designer
‘No’ campaigners have an “agenda”. Anne Tabata
My agenda is the platform that I was
Layout director
proudly elected upon. That platform Duncan Day-Myron
of student unity is why I am the
chairperson of the Yes committee, Office staff
and it is why I believe the CFS is Business manager
the best chance we have at effecting Lorrie Taylor
change. Office manager
For these reasons and many more, Monique Vischschraper
Ad manager
I urge you to vote YES to student Chris Hamelin
unity, YES to lower tuition, and YES
to retaining our membership in the
Board of directors
Canadian Federation of Students. President
Denise Martins David Evans
CSA External Affairs Chairperson
Commissioner-Elect Timothy McBride
Treasurer
Curtis Van Laecke
I just received a text message Secretary
saying “vote NO for CFS”. Not only Joanna Sulzycki
Members
am I very annoyed with this, I am Matthew French
even more concerned on how they Andrew Goloida
got my number. I do not recognize James Hawkins
the number and when I try to call it Marshal McLernon
the operator says the number if off.
Regardless if this someone I know
I am disgusted by these tactics. I can
handle the aggressive campaigners
yelling at me as I try and educated
myself on the YES campaign (even Contributors
though I am not YES). But I cannot Greg Beneteau
begin to comprehend this mob Aldis Brennan
Katelyn Dingman
mentality. If this is a group that wants Josh Doyle
to take over the responsibilities of the Justin Dunk
CFS I am very worried. What kind Cathleen Finlay
Kyle Gillespie
of propaganda will they be shoving Allen Isard
down my throat next? I wonder how Elizabeth McLeod
Sam Morton
they would react if they found out Michael Ridley
the YES campaign did the same. Julia Shonfield
As I mentioned before. I AM Andrew Townsend
Daniel Wright
DISGUSTED. Aislinn Wyatt
Anthony Fedec
Submit your
Letters to the Editor to
The Ontarion is a non-profit organization governed by
a Board of Directors. Since the Ontarion undertakes
the publishing of student work, the opinions expressed
ontarion@uoguelph.ca in this publication do not necessarily reflect those of the
Ontarion Board of Directors. The Ontarion reserves
the right to edit or refuse all material deemed sexist,
racist, homophobic, or otherwise unfit for publication
as determined by the Editor-in-Chief. Material of any
All submissions must form appearing in this newspaper is copyrighted 2009
include your name and and cannot be reprinted without the approval of the
Editor-in-Chief. The Ontarion retains the right of first
phone number. publication on all material. In the event that an advertiser
is not satisfied with an advertisement in the newspaper,
they must notify the Ontarion within four working days
300 word limit on all letters. of publication. The Ontarion will not be held responsible
for advertising mistakes beyond the cost of advertisement.
The Ontarion is printed by the Guelph Mercury.
18 Crossword Apr. 8 - 14, 2010 theontarion.ca

Sudoku

1 8 9 4
5 7 3 1
1 2
1 6 8
6 1
4 9 7
7 4
6 8 7 9
5 9 7 3

8 5
6 1
5 7 3 2 9
1 8 6
BestCrosswords.com 3 2 9
Across Down 8 5 3
1- “______ sprach Zarathustra”; 1- King of comedy
5- Bit of film, to a photog 2- Director Wertmuller 2 7 4 8 1
Congratulations to 8- Zwei cubed 3- Fall prey to a banana peel, say
last week’s winners... 12- Pale purple 4- Swear words 9 4
14- It may be happy 5- Words of denial
15- Small combo 6- Where It.’s at
16- Writer Loos 7- Explosive shells 1 7
Anna Neustaeter 17- French 101 verb 8- Env. Notation
& 18- Canvas shelter used
on camping trips
9- Fatty part of milk
10- Pivot
Jim Morrison 19- One of the 12 tribes of Israel 11- Emblem
21- Period of immaturity
23- ___ de guerre
13- Doze
14- Steering wheel
DeGuile University by Michael Slotwinski
Stop by the Ontarion 24- ___-Mart 20- “You’ve got mail” co
25- 13th letter of the 22- Norwegian king
office (UC 264) to Hebrew alphabet 24- Water holes
pick up your prize! 26- Of religious rites 26- Pace
30- Foot-operated lever 27- Calculus calculation
32- Band 28- Maize
33- Lessen 29- Like tubers
37- Architect Saarinen 30- Schemes
Submit your answers 38- Icons 31- Illumination
to the Ontarion office 39- Incandescence 33- Designer Simpson
for your chance to win 40- Long drawers with 34- Et ___
fancy trimming 35- Accent
42- Feeble peevish complaint 36- Large jug or pitcher
43- Shouts 38- Light
2 Bob’s Dogs 44- One who feels bad 41- Ethereal
45- Strike 42- Sagacity
48- Feel bad about 44- Palm Pilot, e.g.
49- Driller’s deg. 45- Clock pointers
The Ontarion also is 50- Assumed name 46- Accustom
looking for volunteers to 52- Plant or shrub 47- Memento
57- Dangerous weapon 49- Contradict
make crosswords or other 58- Victor’s cry 51- “She turned me into a
puzzles for us. Stop by if 60- Command ___! ...I got better...”
you have any inquiries, 61- Approached 52- Currency of Turkey,
or email Monique at 62- Not any and formerly of Italy
63- Lobster state 53- Enclose
64- Dispatched 54- Comics canine
ontarion@uoguelph.ca 65- Baseball stat 55- 1996 Tony-winning musical
66- Sneaky guy? 56- a family _____
59- Armed conflict
The Ontarion 161.12
Classified
Community Events
Free Tai Chi Classes. The
Guelph Tai Chi Club meets
Monday, Wednesday, Friday
@ 5:30pm on Johnson Green.
Rain Location Mack 316.
Beginners Welcome. For more
information contact: nicholas@
practicaltaichi.ca
Help Fight HIV/AIDS in
Guelph Just By Dining Out.
On Wed April 28th, 2010
from 5:00 p.m. till close, make
a reservation at a participating
restaurant. The restaurant will
donate a portion of your bill
to the AIDS Committee of
Guelph. It’s one night only so –
get a group together and book
early! Visit www.aidsguelph.
org for more information.
Helping a great cause has
never been so easy or tasted so
good!
Housing
Furnished 4 rooms apartment,
near stores & bus stops. Direct
bus to UoG. $450/month/
room includes utilities &
Internet. Offer of “swap rental
for work”, ask info. Photos on
Facebook “mrscelina guelph”.
Celina 519-763-8444
Personals
U N E X P E C T E D
PREGNANCY? Considering
ADOPTION? No
judgements, just talk. I also
have a professional Adoption
Practitioner, home stud,
PRIDE training, ready &
certified, a professional artist/
teacher. Email: Waitingmum@
yahoo.ca for profile.
Services
SELF STORAGE – 1
MONTH FREE. Rent for 2
months & get the 3rd month
free. Heated, Safe, Secure,
Video Surveillance. Close to
U of G. 519-822-2810 www.
someplacesafe.ca
Writer’s block? Professional
essay help available for all
subjects and levels. Masters and
PhD graduates specializing
in editing and research. Toll
free: 1-888-345-8295. Email:
customessay@bellnet.ca Visit
us: www. customessay.com
Community Listings
T hursday April 8
Guelph-Wellington Women
in Crisis – Getting Along
With Your Kids, monthly
workshops for parents and
caregivers of children and
youth 8-18 years old. 7-9pm
at the Sexual Assault Centre,
38 Elizabeth St. To register
call 519-836-1110. X232 or
x300.
All students and staff are
invited to view “Community
Class Works: A documentary
about alternative learning
environments for students”.
Thornborough 1200 at 7pm.
Admission is free and there
will be free food!
Friday April 9
Be the Change – Benefit
Concert – to help build school
in Masaai Mora, Kenya,
with support from Free the
Children. 6pm in Peter Clark
Hall. Tickets: $10.
Open Mic fundraiser for Tin
Roof Global Action – an
international development
non-profit organization serving
Canadian youth and children in
the developing world. 8:10pm
at the Bullring. $5/door!
Classified & Community Listings
Saturday April 10
Guelph Civic Museum Exhibit:
Engravings and Paintings of
local artist John Mattar (1935-
2006). Continues until June
6, 2010. A retrospective of his
watercolour and acrylic paintings
and engravings. 6 Dublin St. S.
Open daily 1-5pm. guelph.ca/
museum.
Sunday April 11
University of Guelph Choirs
- “Force of Nature” Featuring:
19
Missa Gaia. Conductor Marta
McCarthy. St. George Anglican
Church, 99 Woolwich St. Adults
$15, Seniors/Students $10.
7pm. 519-824-4120 x52991 or
kbygden@uoguelph
Wednesday April 14
Storytelling at the Boathouse.
8pm (every second Wednesday
through December) Boathouse
at 116 Gordon St. Sandy Schoen,
storytellers@guelpharts.ca, 519-
767-0017. www.guelpharts.ca/
storytellers. Free. Donations
graciously accepted.
Ongoing:
Guelph Food Bank Spring
Food Drive – March 24-April
11. Most needed items include
canned meat, pasta, cheese
spread, peanut butter, canned
vegetables, canned tomatoes and
pasta sauce, stew, diapers, toilet
paper, paper towels.
Help recognize World Lupus
Day on Saturday, May 8. Team
Butterfly will be walking to raise
funds for research and increase
awareness of this life altering
chronic illness. Please go to
www.walkablock.ca to register.
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