Running head: EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

Emotional Intelligence Paper

Amanda Ayers
PSY/301
July 18, 2016
Theresa Cruz

EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

Abstract
According to Mayer, Salovey, & Caruso (2004), the capacity to reason about emotions,
and of emotions to enhance thinking. It includes the abilities to accurately perceive emotions, to
access and generate emotions so as to assist thought, to understand emotions and emotional
knowledge, and to reflectively regulate emotions so as to promote emotional and intellectual
growth (p.194). Emotional intelligence can come in the form of stress and greatly effect
communication systems. Emotional Intelligence plays a vital role in the workplace, as well as, in
ones home and personal life. It has a great impact on relationships in these areas. However,
there are many ways one can improve their emotional intelligence.

EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

Emotional Intelligence Paper

Emotional Intelligence. Is it real? What or who does it effect? Not
everyone knows exactly what emotional intelligence is or that it is a common
aspect of our daily lives. Truth be told, without emotional intelligence life
would be extremely difficult. This paper will discuss emotional intelligence
and its relation to communication, the use of emotional intelligence concepts in the
work, home, and personal life, as well as different ways to improve emotional
intelligence.
Emotional Intelligence and Communication
Before we get into the correlation between emotional intelligence and communication,
lets first look at just exactly what emotional intelligence is.
Mayer, Salovey, & Caruso (2004) best defines Emotional Intelligence as:
The capacity to reason about emotions, and of emotions to enhance thinking. It
includes the abilities to accurately perceive emotions, to access and generate emotions so
as to assist thought, to understand emotions and emotional knowledge, and to reflectively
regulate emotions so as to promote emotional and intellectual growth (p. 197).
Now that there is a baseline understanding of emotional intelligence, the focus can shift
on just how it ties in with communication. Stress and learning how to handle it is a part of
emotional intelligence. Stress can have a negative impact on communication. Individuals under
high levels of stress tend to become detached from their surroundings, family, friends, and their
life period. It negatively effects relationships, whether at home or work, even the relationship

EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

with ourselves. However, if individuals learn how to manage stress, they will then be able to
create a life of success. According to Segal (2008), managing stress helps individuals place trust
in others, give a sense of creativity, increase sensory awareness, and give them the ability to
attend to their self-needs, as well as the needs of others.
Emotional Intelligence Concepts in Work Life, Home Life and
Personal Life
Emotional Intelligence plays a vital role in the workplace, as well as, in ones home and
personal life. At one time society believed that all that was necessary for a person to succeed
was to have a high IQ. It was thought that individuals with a high IQ performed better in the
workplace because they were more proficient in analytical thinking and reasoning of problems.
A cognitively intelligent individual may be able to quickly resolve issues that are related to
mathematics or science, but if the same individual does not have a high EQ they may have a
difficult time with emotional issues. If this individual is in a leadership role within an
organization and has difficulty with emotional issues, working in a group could prove to be
difficult for all involved. For this very reason, many employers are now seeking individuals with
not only a high IQ but also a high EQ. Sometimes the individual best suited for the job is not
always the smartest person in the room, but the one with the highest EQ.
Emotional Intelligence is needed for a successful personal and home life. The fifth
domain which deals with handling relationships is especially important when it comes to
marriage and family. It is always emotional when dealing with matters of the heart, so it is
imperative to be able to handle ones emotions and the emotions of others, along with having
empathy if the objective is to have any harmony within the home. Life is stressful especially in

EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

this day and age, and it does not get easier when adding a spouse and a child or two to the mix.
Many marriages end because one or both people involved do not understand their mates
emotional needs.
Ways to Improve Emotional Intelligence
There are many ways one can improve their emotional intelligence. To
begin this process, one must find out what gives those feelings of relaxation,
safeness, calmness, and the ability to focus (Segal, 2008). The key to
copping with questionable emotions is knowing that we are in control of
them, and not the other way around (Segal, 2008). Once you can recognize
you EQ and learn how to control and improve it, you will begin to see success
in your relationships. The best step that has come across in improving EQ is
learning when enough is enough, learning how to stop dwelling on negative
thinking and shift the focus outward (Rosenthal, 2012).
Conclusion
Overall, emotional intelligence is the ability to perceive, control and evaluate emotions in oneself and others - and to use that information appropriately. EQ effects all aspects of our
daily lives. It affects all relationships. However, there are ways that emotional intelligence can
be built up and strengthened daily. The best way to put it, according to Rosenthal (2012),
It may not be possible for everyone to have a psychotherapist. But you can become your
own therapist. It all starts with learning how to listen to your feelings. While it may not
always be easy, developing the ability to tune in to your own emotions is the first and
perhaps most important step.

EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

REFERENCES

Mayer, J.D., Salovey, P., & Caruso, D. (2004). Emotional intelligence: Theory, findings, and
Implications. Psychological inquiry, 15(3), 197-215. Retrieved from
http://www.unh.edu/emotional_intelligence/EI%20Assets/Reprints...EI%20Proper/EI
2004MayerSaloveyCarusotarget.pdf
Rosenthal M.D., N. (2012, January 05). 10 Ways to Enhance Your Emotional Intelligence.
Retrieved from Psychology Today: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/your-mindyour-body/201201/10-ways-enhance-your-emotional-intelligence
Segal, J. (2008). The Language of Emotional Intelligence: the five essential tools for building
powerful and effective relationships. New York, NY: McGraw-Hill.