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Phraser Connector
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By Elaine Storey
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Standing
Understanding
and Misunderstood ...
An editorial by Elaine Storey
Do you notice that the harder you seek
someones approval and understanding, the
more frustrated you become.
So, back to getting your point across, someWe all have a desire to be understood and often times you have to make the other person feel
times suffer great angst because we cant find
good about themselves so they feel good about
the words to adequately explain ourselves.
what you want them to understand.
When you look into the eyes of someone when
you are in mid-sentence and they are scuffing
their shoes or picking spinach out of their
teeth, you just have to stop and ask yourself
why you even bother.
Assuming they arent listening, you have options about how to proceed...remembering
there is a fine line between getting them to
understand and bullyiying.
So, the first rule on How to proceed has absolutely nothing to do with you unfortunately and Compliment them. You sure look nice today
everything to do with them.
That new hairstyle really shows off you eyes.
Accept that people wont always get you. Accept that their opinion of you is based much
more on where they are in their lives than
where you are. Accept that they will only hear
Who is this person to you? Are they in your
This is a bit of slippery slope here because if
one snippet of what you say. Accept that they
circle of friends? Are they part of your family? you over compliment them, they will automat- can say things and not mean it. Accept that
In the scheme of things, you must ask yourself, ically become suspicious and the opposite will theirs isn't the only voice in the room.
why you need them to understand you.
occur and they will think you are making fun of
them. A reverse compliment goes like this
Our need to be understood is often pressured
Are you in negotiation talks with them? Do
You look nice in that colour? ...to the person
by the approaching train or the late hour or by
they handle the money in your relationship? Do with low self esteem, they hear this...You nor- a line we have drawn in the sand.
they own the prettiest shoes?
mally dont look good in all the other colours,
only this specific shade of paisley.
Sometimes you have to let the point go. If you
The second rule is to be honest about why you
are driven to win the point at all costs, maybe
are seeking their approval. Do you need their
There is a point when you may have to abandon its time to reconsider why you need to be
understanding to proceed with your modus
all of the above and admit they are not worth right? What would happen if you looked at it
operandi . Can your plan only be hatched
the hassle. You can agree to disagree, and that from another point of you. Or through the eyes
with their consent? Do you need to have them is okay.
of the other person. Truly through their eyes
side with you instead of siding with the other
from their six foot frame wearing blue socks
guy?
Even if you get someones full understanding
and unkempt hair. Their ability to hear what
and support, there is still no guarantee they
you have to say will always be based on how
Where does your self esteem rate in all of this? will like you. Siding with you is no replacethey feel in that exact moment. We may wonIs your esteem down a pint? If so maybe what ment for friendship. Seeing eye to eye may be der forever and back why something isn't as
you need really, is about six hours of retail
seen as giving in, and for those who thrive on
obvious to others, when it is so obvious to you.
therapy.
discourse, it may feel like the cowardly approach to take.
Maybe sometimes we may just have to be more
But, getting back to the self esteem thingy is
understanding so as not to be misunderstood.
there a point when you realize that knowing
Truly understanding someones point of view is
what you know is enough. Maybe the whole
practically impossible based on the truth that
world doesn't need to know it. Can you honwe all come from a different place. We may
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OPEN
Evenings & Weekends
Your one stop for
Gel Nails, Micha Lashes,
Pedicures, Waxing & more
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BY Audrey Read
The community was saddened by the death of Bill Satterwaite, he had been living in the area for several years and will be missed by his family and
many friends. May you rest in peace Bill.
*****
August 31, 2016 I was blessed with my sixth Great Grandchild! Little Jayce made his appearance weighing in at six pounds and one ounce. His
proud parents are Tanis and Clay and his very proud Grand parents are Bruce & Jean Read; Shannon Payne, and the Great Grandparents, Dan &
Sharon Payne, Eva Kalhood and Evelyn Seigner as well as myself so this little fellow will have a lot of babysitters I'm sure!
*****
You know with the lovely sunshine we have been having I managed to get a fairly good sunburn, now it is beginning to peel and it always makes
me wonder why if it is going to come off in layers so darn thin why couldn't we lose at least enough to make a difference!....People who were
born thin don't know how lucky they are!
*****
Been patronizing the Endako Roadhouse quite a bit lately with several friends, that is a darn good place to eat let me tell you! Not only is there
good food but the atmosphere is so nice and friendly! Thanks Mandy and staff for a great place to go that is close to home!
*****
Have been trying a lot of new recipes that will use up some of my many zucchini's that keep producing in my greenhouse. I think the best is the
Chocolate loaf, thanks Phyllis for that recipe! It not only tastes good but also freezes well.
*****
Rita & I went for a wiener roast at George & Toni-Lynn's the other night, had a great time under the roof of their gazebo while watching the thunder and lightening storm and later the beautiful rainbows!
*****
People are busy hauling their hay for winter storage now, then it will be time to bring the cattle home, sort for shipping and then hopefully have
some fall pasture before having to start feeding.
*****
Got a message from "Yon Editor" today, September 15....she says she has to have an "early deadline which is September 19!" Now really, Elaine,
don't you realize how very busy everyone is at this time of year?..Naw, I don't think she does! But you know, she DOES do a jolly good job with
our little paper and sure works hard for Autumn Services so I guess I'll just "get with it" and send some bits of malarkey in for her...good thing I
kissed the blarney stone isn't it! LOL!
*****
Sold my last bull today, Ol' Buddy was leased out to our friends the Chapman's for the summer. His new home will be with Harold & Bonnie
Morowski who have been buying cattle from us for several years. At least I know he is going to a good home and that means a lot to me. Now I
Diaper
onlyAhave
steers left and you know...they don't reproduce worth a hoot! LOL
2 spoons
*****
4 containers
Finally got the last of the potatoes dug and in the basement, I didn't plant nearly as many this year, was a good thing too because they really produced and most of them are huge! Have been giving a lot away along with carrots, cabbage etc. Some
folks aren't as fortunate and it is good to give a helping hand now and then. I think I finally have picked the
last of the zucchini thank goodness! I am getting a bit tired of trying to figure out what to do with it. The
tomatoes are still producing and sure are delicious, it will be a sad day when I have to go back to those
store bought things.
*****
The Rose Lake Community Hall put on a great Poker Ride & Cowboy Social on Sept. 18th, the steak dinner was delicious and I even won a jar of Wild Cranberry Jelly....my absolute favourite! Several Fraser
Lake folks including Don & Judy Carter as well as Carl & Ethel Wiggins rode in the ride and everyone had
a great time.
*****
I have several trees in my yard of different varieties, some are bright yellow and some are bright red, they
look gorgeous! Sure be nice if the leaves stay on the trees for a few weeks instead of getting blown off in
the wind. With all this rain and then sun I have had to get back to mowing the lawn regularly
again....seems like the work never ends!....I AM getting quite concerned about this winter though....no
cattle to feed, could end up to be pretty boring to say the least! I may have to take up some kind of hobby....ah well, time will tell, for all I know I may be living in Hawaii come December!
*****
There is a confounded Magpie hanging around my chicken house...could be the reason I haven't been getting many eggs lately come to think of it!...Anyway he has the bloomin' nerve to sit on the fence and
squawk at me as if I am invading HIS domain! I'd like to throw a rock at him and teach him a lesson but I
wouldn't hit him anyway! LOL I tell you, what I have to put up with these days!
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Members of the public who wish to cut firewood on vacant Crown Land for personal use
must obtain authorization via a Free Use Permit for Firewood from the Ministry of
Forest Lands and Natural Resources Operations. There is no charge for this privilege, only a
commitment to abide by a number of simple rules that are outlined in the Free Use Permit.
Firewood cutters must obtain a Free Use Permit from EACH Forest District where they
intend t cut firewood on Crown Land, signed by EACH District Manager or designate.
Each permittee must read and understand the conditions of the Free Use Permit for FireWood Cutting prior to signing it. The Permittee must carry the Permit at all times, and
must produce the Permit at the request of a Resource Officer, Conservation Officer or a
Peace Officer. Cutting firewood on Crown Land without this permit may result in a confiscation of the wood and charges .
It is up to the permit holder to determine whether he/she is cutting on vacant crown land.
More information as to the areas, can be obtained by contacting the Vanderhoof Natural Resource District Office at 1.250.567-6363 or
Toll Free at Inquire BC 1-800-663-7867
Call:
250.699-6225
Closed 12:001:00 daily
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She was one of the smallest in the group. Her hi-vis vest hung
almost to her knees.
Her eyes were slightly red-rimmed from crying, and she held
tight a large picture of two beautiful women.
In her small hands she twisted a red, cloth bag. The contents tobacco - a gift from her friends in Stellaten.
Her name is Jaden West, her friends and family call her JJ.
She is twelve years old.
She stood quietly, her family and friends at her side.
She listened, holding back tears when family friend from Vancouver Klath-Bhi drummed and sang to her. He commended
her for being an example of how to be. You carried our ancestors on your back and made them very proud.
When he knelt beside her he looked into her eyes and said he
wished to grow up to be just like her. To which the crowd laughed.
Following the drumming ceremony, she was led to her Aunty Alanas house where
all the family was gathering.
With an easy smile she admitted to getting tired on the way, and her feet got sore, but
she said, Cancer patients feel worse. And that was justification in her eyes to do what
she did.
And with a little giggle she thinks her school friends might think she was crazy, but she
thought others would think she was cool.
The day before her Aunty Alana passed away from stage 4 gall bladder cancer, JJ wanted
to raise public awareness of cancer. Inspired by Terry Foxs Marathon of Hope run and
the Cops for Cancer Tour de North, JJ thought she too could do a walk of her own.
She told her dad she wanted to walk from their home in Burns Lake to Nadleh where her
Aunty lived ...some ninety kilometers away.
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Waiting for the team
Dave & Jolene Webb and Mike LeDuc over half way there
Participants line up behind the Terry Fox flag
. 2016
2016 Terry
Fox Run
Edna
Vanwerkhoven
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Donations of food gladly accepted for the food
share program at Autumn Services.
We have people using this daily, and they are
very appreciative of your thoughtfulness.
A Cut Beyond
Open 9:305:00
Monday to Friday
Call 699-0055
Please stay tuned
Big changes are happening for October.
Watch your mailboxes for a flyer soon
Fraser Lake
Summer Hours
OPEN Mon to Fri
8:00 to 5:30
OPEN Sat
9:00 to 5:00
closed Sunday
TECHNOPURE WATER
Water Treatment Systems
Building Center
Shop our September flyer
for our Paint & Flooring
event...flyer ends
September 10
250.699-6506
www.ace-canada.ca
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The
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Writers Life
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Anthony realized that if we already had tons of writing on-line and tons of writing off-line, that the sensible
thing to do was to form a publishing house to protect that writing so that I could always write a play about
my story, or sell the movie rights, or anything else I wanted. It struck us both as deeply wrong that a publisher had more rights to an author's creation than the author, all while still doing publicity, book signings, and
likely making little or even nothing off of royalties. Publishing houses quickly learn if the book they've
signed on isn't the new 'Harry Potter' or 'Fifty Shades of Grey' to backbench the book, the publicity and the
author leaving authors like beached whales: high and dry.
Originally the business model for StarkLight was purely defensive: make a corporation where we can safely
write and play without fear of having our 'babies' taken from us. Keep the copyrights intact and for the many
people who were already clamoring for GAF books and for Carnival Fun and other stories to be developed it
gave a place for our already hefty fan base to buy official copies of books. We decided to start off with a biyearly anthology for speculative fiction called simply: StarkLight Anthologies.
We put out a tenuous query for other author-friends to become involved in the anthologies and were bombarded with submissions. The result was to diversify into more anthologies, novels, of course, collaborative
novel writing (think of it like campfire story telling where each author takes a turn at taking the helm of the
story. This is done under the supervision of one story co-coordinator who makes sure that the story stays on
target and makes sense). This recently branched out further into a poetry imprint: StarkLight Philosophies.
StarkLight press continues to pick up speed and, like a snowball rolling downhill, much of it is driven off the
passion of sheer momentum. As we meet more and more talented authors to add to our growing business
community. Born out of my time in Fraser Lake, I will continue to keep you up to date on: A Writer's Life
through the Phraser Connector. Thanks to Elaine Storey for keeping up this fabulous regional publication!
Next month I will be interviewing publisher/author and business man Anthony Stark on his take of the Birth
of StarkLight Press. Tune in here!
parts
their cords
Radios
Microwaves
Vacuums
Heaters
Lightbulbs
Cardboard
Car batteries
250.699-8322
20 Cougar Street
We have
Storage
Space
For RENT
Or LEASE
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Community page
For Sale
Dyson Canister Vacuum (Like New)
-Bagless-perfect for high traffic areas and if you
have pets (shedding)
FOOT CARE
Diabetic foot care is available at Autumn Services
Friday, Oct. 21st,
Book directly through Debbie Noble
@ 250.570-1281
DANCE CLASSES
SEPTEMBER SCHEDULE
TUESDAYS:
2:30 - 3:30 Sr. Fitness Drop-in by donation
3:30 - 4:30 4-6 yr. old Tap
4:30 - 5:30 5-9 yr. old Jr. Hip-Hop
5:30 - 6:30 10 & up Sr. Hip-Hop
WEDNESDAYS:
3:00 - 3:30 Tiny Tots 2-3 yr. olds (Limit 5 students)
3:30 - 4:30 4-6 yr. old Jr Jazz
4:30 - 5.30 7-9 yr. old Intermediate Jazz
5:30 - 6:30 10 & up Sr. Jazz
Classes will begin Sept 6th and end Dec 14th, 2016
Classes will be held at Autumn Services building in Fraser Lake
There will be a Christmas Show, date yet to be determined
Email elementdancestudios@gmail.com for a registration form and information package.
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W E RE ON
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FAC E B O O K
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Book a Birthday Party,
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By Pablo Neruda
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