Danny is the 16-year-old son of an acquaintance; while we have never met, he is aware that his

mom and I know each other. This connection, small as it is, proved to be helpful in making him
feel a little more comfortable speaking with an otherwise complete stranger, especially one
asking specific, personal questions.
Psychosocial Development
The first concept I wanted to ask him about was easy to chooseidentity, which is such a
huge part of an adolescents life. Berger defines identity achievement as the point at which a
person understands who he or she is as a unique individual, in accord with past experiences and
future plans (Berger, 2016, p. 351). Since identity is such a broad topic, I used Eriksons four
arenas of identity formation to guide some of my questions.
I asked Danny about his religious identity. Unlike many Utah families, Dannys isnt
LDS. He mentions that a lot of his friends are, and there are aspects of it that he finds appealing
things like a community, friends to hang out and go camping and play basketball with, and
doing community service. However, he questions some of their beliefs and why some of them
are beneficial. Do they really just do everything the Book of Mormon or their religious leaders
tell them, he wonders. Danny is showing here that he is not only questioning authority, but trying
to figure out his own beliefs about how the world works, what motivates and manipulates people.
I also asked him about his relationship with his mom, whom I know only vaguely
weve only met a couple of times, although we have a good number of mutual friends. I was
looking for the classic parent-teen conflict, what Berger explains as the drive for independence,
arising from biological as well as psychological impulses and social expectations, clashes with
the parents desire for control (Berger, 2016, p. 357). Surprisingly, Danny got along pretty well
with his mother. Apparently, shes pretty tech-savvy for her age, and makes an effort to
understand his problems and issues. Still, he says, she sometimes finds her to be too involved at
times, and would like a little more personal space. He regards her over-concern as a lack of trust,
that shes afraid he might do something terrible.
Cognitive Development
I was eager to question Danny about egocentrism, which Berger defines as a
characteristic of adolescent thinking that leads young people to believe in their own uniqueness,
and to imagine that other people are also focused on them (Berger, 2016, p. 330). While this
thinking is amplified in adolescents, adult struggle with this concept as well. When I asked
Danny how much he cares about what other people think of him, his answer was surprisingly
logical and mature; he only seemed to care about the opinions of those he felt were important or
close to him. I was amused when he mentioned that he did care more about what girls thought
about him, especially the ones he thought were cute. I was reminded of the stupid things I used to
do at his age, just to impress girls or make them laugh. Danny did say that he put a fair amount
of thought into the clothes he wore; personal fashion, it seemed, was not only an indicator of
coolness, but also a uniform of sorts that sorted people into different groups and cliques: the
jocks wore certain clothes, as did the goths, skaters, and so forth. So there was an element of
everybody caring about what everybody else wore.
I also asked Danny about his general approach to decision-making: did he think about
things intuitivelythought that arises from an emotion or hunchor analyticallythought
that results from analysis, such as a systematic exploration of pros and cons, risks and
consequences, possibilities and facts (Berger, 2016, p. 335)? The answer, as it turned out, was a
mix of both, depending on the situation. He mentioned that for smaller decisions that didnt

matter as much, hed just go with how he felt about it without thinking it through too much.
However, for larger, more important decisions, he would want to take some time to step back and
analyze the facts. Sometimes this was hard, and he might ask his friends or even his parents for
their opinions. He would also find pro/con lists to be helpful.
Biological Development
I was hesitant to broach the subject of puberty and physical changes, but Danny seemed
comfortable talking about his body. I asked Danny when he hit his growth spurt, which Berger
defines as the relatively sudden and rapid physical growth that occurs during puberty (Berger,
2016, p. 322), and how it compared to kids his age. He mentioned that it started around age 13,
and that for a little while, he was embarrassed when his female peers were taller than he was. He
stated that his father wasnt particularly tall, nor was his mother, and that he was a little worried
he may not be at least six feet tall, which was his ideal. He was, however, pleased to note that he
was around the average amongst his peers, and reassured that he wasnt abnormally short.
Height, as well as musculature and athletic ability, were somewhat important in terms of
perceived coolness.
So, then, how exactly did he feel about his body? Did he have a healthy body image,
which Berger defines as a persons idea of how his or her body looks, especially related to size
and shape (Berger, 2016, p. 324)? Danny admitted that he was a little overweight, and that he
wished he were more athletic and fit. While he had friends who were athletes and lifted a lot, he
had heard that really heavy lifting interfered with puberty. (I told him to do his own research, and
not to take anyones word for it.) He seemed torn: on the one hand, guys with strong bodies
seemed to be more attractive to girls; on the other hand, he felt that attraction should be much
more than just physical, and didnt want a girl to like him just for his muscles. I reassured him
that this was a mature way of thinking, and thanked him for his time.
Reference List
Berger, K. S. (2016). Invitation to the Life Span (3rd ed.). New York, NY: Worth Publishers.