CHAPTER 4- GENDER AND FAMILY

QUESTION:
How did your parents influence the development of your gender role? In what ways did you
model yourself after your same gender parent? In what ways are your conceptions of appropriate
gender roles similar to or different from those of your parents? During high school, what
influences did your peers have on your gender role development? How important were your
boyfriends or girlfriends in developing your sense of yourself as a woman or man? Who are the
people who most influence your gender-role concepts today? As a parent, what gender roles will
you model for your children?
ANSWER:
My parents never married and my mom has been a single parent most of my life so my
mothers gender role growing up might have been quite different than the typical nuclear family
male/female roles. She was not only busy working full time but also came home to cook, clean,
and bathe her two daughters. Something that has predominantly stood out to me and has greatly
influenced my gender role is her emphasis of independence as a woman. In a way she used
manipulation and verbal appellations (Strong & Cohen, 2014, p. 124) to shape me into a more
independent driven woman. For example, she was strict about me getting good grades and to
take my education more seriously so I could have opportunities for scholarships and be able to
finish college and get a degree. She would remind me to work hard for myself so I would not
have to depend on a man to be successful or financially stable. I think that this emphasis on
education should be important to both gender roles but my moms bias toward men in general

could have shaped my ideas toward being more cautious about marrying the right person and
having the urge to get a college degree before making that commitment.
My dad on the other hand also worked full time and did the cooking and cleaning around
his house for his wife and two other children. I got to see him on most weekends and during the
summer but our quality time together was when he taught me how to fish and when he wanted
me to help him with the cooking. Fishing could be seen as a more masculine trait but it is
something that brings back so many great memories and is an activity that I still enjoy today. I
think that different gendered activities are important for families to participate in together to help
kids understand that there shouldnt be a fine line between expectations and behaviors of male
and females.
In the high school setting I was interested in joining the dance team which would be a
typical feminine gender role but we actually did have around 4 or 5 guys on the team. This
shaped me by realizing that male roles can be very gender stereotypical especially through
teenage years when we may have a more bias opinion based on what we were taught growing up
in our own homes. I am sure at some point these men were called names or even made fun of by
their peers which on average, is about 30% more than those who follow the traditional gender
norms of male expectations (Strong & Cohen, 2014, p. 127).
Growing up my parents and family shaped some of the bias gender role perceptions I
have had but as I am transitioning into adulthood and gaining more knowledge of the diversity
and complexity of gender roles, I have been able to become more understanding and aware of
them. Parents are the biggest influences in shaping these gender roles and as a parent I will
probably dress my daughter in pink and want my son to try out different sports teams. One of the
things I will emphasize to them though is to want to try something new and explore different

activities to find out what speaks to them as an individual. I hope to teach my children to be
accepting of everybodys ideas and preferences relating to gender roles and so they arent
susceptible to bullying or misplacing stereotypes on people before they get to know them as a
person.
Word Count: 598

Work Cited
Strong, B. & Cohen, T.F. (2014). The Marriage and Family Experience: Intimate
Relationships in a Changing Society (12th ed.). Belmont, CA: Wadsworth.