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A-flat accidentals in the initial bars seem unnecessary, as it's flat in the key sig

and I don't spot an A-natural until bar 7


- bar 6, right hand, needs the same voice 1 / voice 2 treatment as bar 5 (put the
chord in voice 1 only and the inner voice in voice 2, which will make the stems
flip down)
- there's a double flat in b.28 and 30. Usually, these are unnecessary in
chromatic passages; select the note and tap Return to enharmonically respell to
D-natural
- in bb. 64-67 there are some A-sharps and B-flats in close proximity - unless
you've got a specific reason resulting from harmony for this enharmonic
discrepancy (possible sometimes), normally readability would be favoured, so
they would all become B-flats
- b. 88 over the barline to 89: B-flat to F-sharp augmented 5th looks a little
awkward in notation, but is then justified by the F-sharp in the left hand, so I
think it's the right approach after all
- later in the score the boxed text hitpoints refer mostly to the music, but it would
be better for them to acknowledge moments in the film to show how they sync
Canon:
- I attach my version (just for illustration!)
- in b.10 you've got a 5th followed by an 8ve and then a parallel 8ve into the
next bar; the best way I can think of to fix it is to go down to C instead of A in the
left hand, but it then doesn't work if implemented earlier in the right hand - does
this have to be a strict canon? If yes, then it will need more work here. If we do
this in the right hand we end up with 5ths by contrary motion (also bad)
- more suspensions would be nice and bars 20-22 give an opportunity for two 7-6
in a row
- the Renaissance formula for cadence says, if the counterpoint is being added in
the lower voice, there should be a 5th followed by a minor 3rd and then the final
note - I include an illustration
Exploring:
- switching from pizz. to arco quickly may sometimes be a problem, but only a
violinist could tell you f this is the case here in bar 13
No Country:
- is this for quite a tender scene? It sounds mostly gentle to me, but could be
quite a different experience with the film clip, of course
- the piano could use some phrasing slurs

- the hitpoints could be more descriptive

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