Sherrell Redfern

Wp2
Eng 101-108
Zack DePiero
November 18, 2016

Bipolar Disorder
The Disease The Cause The Effects

Could you imagine wanting to die at the thought of waking up? I couldnt. But this is
what many people that suffer from bipolar disorder have to deal with. Majority of cases from this
disease causes people to lead miserable lives with nothing to look forward to. However,
depending on your background - how you grew up, your discipline, and what you know - you
would look at the disease with a totally different perspective. In order to prove that, I picked two
people with the same differences Ive described to point out specific ways they interpret the
disease. Also, My first piece of writing was a case report written by 3 [Catherine Zhang, Mark
Agius, & Rashid Zaman] psychiatrists. In contrast to an article written by a patient that is greatly
effected on a daily basis by bipolar disorder who would prefer to remain nameless. Both pieces
of writing are talking about gentlemen in their early 40s. Im intended to prove that the patient
describes the disease better because he has actually experience the different coping mechanisms,
treatments, and thoughts of the process.

There are countless numbers of moves made in each piece that makes it significant.
Depending on the reader and their purpose for reading a piece, they will be looking for different

things to retain after reading a piece. Each move makes a difference because depending on the
target audience. Because all effective writers tailor their language to the audience they are trying
to reach.

The 3 psychiatrists worked together to produce a case report that relates to bipolar
disorder. This genre has an audience that dictates the format of how this genre of writing came to
be. Audience, those who are the (intended or unintended) recipients of the rhetorical message .
( Laura Carroll , 49 ) Specifically this case report was written as conference paper. Exigence is
the circumstance or condition that invites a response. ( Laura Carroll , 48 ) So we can infer that
the audience is highly educated colleagues of the authors because the exigence is different. The
report begins with a summary and an introduction which gives you more details and insight into
what points about bipolar disorder they want you to grasp as you read. The psychiatrists uses
terms mostly known to others in that specific field of work to incorporate big ideas into one
sentence. For example These include disease chronology and symptomatology; response to
antiepileptic medication. This idea was large, instead of breaking it down so almost anyone
could understand, they used vocab familiar in the field. This use of language shows how
interpersonal the piece really is.

In contrast to the case report, the piece written by a patient was more understandable and
relatable to the general public. The patient is a man in his early 40s who has been suffering with
bipolar disorder since childhood. The article is formatted with 3 main headlines mania,
depression and the middle. He uses words that are relatable to everyone. He also uses words in
a tone that is submissive to his disease, meaning he accepts the effects as they come at him. No
matter what it is - work, hanging out with friends, exercise - I dont enjoy things because the

smallest details annoy me. This shows how the depression of his disease affects his life on a
regular basis. He chooses words like annoy to make you see how bad small details really
bother him in a big way.

The psychiatrists worked to provide some of the same but different focus points even
though the authors discussed the same topic. One of the focus points that was included by both
authors talked about how the patient coped with the disease on a daily basis. Though they had the
same focus point, each patient had different tactics and approaches as to how they deal with the
many effects of the disorder. The psychiatrists deciphered how the different medications that
were being administered affected the patient physical and mental health. The case report states
Lithium and valproate were effective in mood stabilization, but was of limited use due to
intolerable adverse effects. When reading this piece I realized how medicine can improve a
problem, however they all come with side effects. On the other hand, the patients article
describes how he uses exercises as his method of healing on the contrary to putting chemicals in
your body that can give you bigger problems than the actual one you were looking to solve. The
patient says I have the most fun running around, exercising, and entertaining people this is how
I cope with my depression. The patients method is better because there is no negative physical
side effects to his coping mechanisms.

Another focus point the two pieces of writings share is the causes of the disease bipolar
disorder in the 2 patients. Although, the authors have the same focus point, yet again the pieces
look at them in different ways. For instance the article produced by the psychiatrists looks at the
bodily functions of bipolar disorder. Because of their profession, their attention is directed to the
causes that relate to things such as heredity and brain patterns. After further research into the

patients medical history, the discovery that both his grandmother and mother was diagnosed
with bipolar disorder By looking at things through an explainable or logical perspective, this
convention appeals to logos. Whereas the article produced by the patient discusses the negative
thing that happened in his life which caused him the disease. When my depressed phase kicks
into high gear I always refer back to the first time I felt this anxious, depressed feeling. Even
though I feel I understand what happened to cause me to feel this way, I have no defense against
myself when taken over by my depressed state of mind. I inferred that the patient believes the
disease stems from an incident that occurred in the past. Which is a totally different outlook than
the psychiatrists on the causes of bipolar disorder.

Even though the psychiatrists produced paper presented more logos to provide ethos -
referrers to the credibility of the rhetor ( Laura Carroll , 54 )- than the patients piece, I feel that
in order to talk about a topic you have to have more knowledge than something you learned in a
book. When talking about something as important as a disease I feel there should some form of
compassion through the text. Verses all fact and statistics, which makes the writing more stuffy,
educational, and informative (if you understand psychiatric terminology.

No matter what genres and topics that are compared or contrasted, there will always be
specific conventions to each piece of writing that will give hints to the writers purpose. After
breaking down the moves made by the authors I have concluded that the patient is better
qualified to explain how bipolar disorder affects people in many ways at different times. Being
as though he has experienced all that was discussed he can give you facts based on the fact that
he has been through it.

Work Cited
Backpacks vs. Briefcases: Steps Toward Rhetorical
Analysis
By: Laura Carroll
Source #1 : hppt://www.phychiatriadanubina/casereport
psych.com
Source #2 : hppt://www.healthline.com/health/bipolardisorder-feels-like#1

ENG 101-108 Feedback Matrix for

WP2
Table of Textual Features and Qualities
Did
Not Meet
Expectation
s
Thesis Statement
Use of Textual
Evidence from Genres

Met
Expectation
s

X
X/X-

Use of Course
Readings

Analysis

Organization/Structu
re

Attention to
Genre/Conventions and
Rhetorical Factors

Excee
ded
Expectatio
ns

Exploration of
Disciplinarity (Different
Perspectives)

X+

Sentence-level
Clarity, Mechanics, Flow

Comments and Grade

Redfern,

This is fantastic workexcellent job.

Please check out my comments on some
little tips, as well as some bigger
questions/suggestions. Dont forget to
remind your reader once in a while about
what it is, exactly, that your argument.
Here and there, it felt like I was just
reading about some random stuff, and I
wasnt super-clear on how it related to
your argument. (Im not saying it DIDNT,
Im just saying that you need to find a way
to work that in.)

Overall, though, you nailed this WP2

and Im super-happy with your hard work.

19/20